Strangeverse 2076+

[pauwoo]

Los Angeles Leopards (86-69, .555, 2nd NL West) @ Las Vegas Outlaws (87-68, .561, 1st NL West)
Las Vegas, the team I love to hate in a city I love, even if my wallet doesn’t (split 6’s? Of course. Always. Dealer’s showing a King? Split ‘em, sir!)… they are our self-appointed enemy, representing a corrupt and malicious intent to our good and noble motivations. And, judging by the comments posted on their team’s message board, they feel the same way – it’s a mirror-image perception paradox where we are their Castor Troy and they are ours… we’ll both be reaching for the speargun here, looking to vanquish our misunderstood foe. What is clear is that we’re not much different than Las Vegas – we can both hit, we both get on base (their .331 OBP bests our .322 OBP), and we both have good (read – serviceable) staffs. Their top three offensive players are capable of giving any staff fits – 1B Jacob Wells (124 OPS+, 22 HR) and RF Jordan Maze (144 OPS+, 31 HR) provide a bit of pop, and SS Ray Gerhold (144 OPS+, .428 OBP) does just about everything else. There are really no easy outs when you face off with the Outlaws and given that our pitchers only tend to shine when there is some low hanging fruit in their general vicinity, all bets are off here… it could really go either way for us over these 4 games. Both clubs have a lot to gain and everything to lose during this series – add in the fact that we don’t really like each other much and you have a recipe for some of the best, most meaningful baseball our league's fans have seen this year or it could just devolve into a sort of winner-take-all cage match complete with metal chairs swung like baseball bats, atomic leg drops off the top turnbuckle and a pair of alligator-skinned shoes that would make the Golden Stallion himself green with envy as the prize awaiting its claim by the victorious party. Look, I’m not stylish enough to hold a swank pair of alligators down – but, I’ll be happy to give it a try.




156 of 162: Merl Crawford (10-10, 3.99) @ Elijah Rizzuto (15-11, 3.37)
Win, 6-4. Merl’s changeup was effective – when he hit the brakes, the bats flew by – over 6.1 innings, only 2 hits allowed (one was a solo homer from Jacob Wells, though), and 2 Ks for our rapidly improving young hurler. The Outlaws made it interesting in the bottom of the 7th, putting 3 runs on the board and coming to within a run – but, in the end, it was Otto Isaac’s 2-run jack in the top of the 5th that was the difference maker as we never relinquished the lead after that frame. Mullen went 3 for 5 and scored, Pepper went 2 for 5, scored, and drove one in, we got two SAC FLYS, and swiped a couple of bags for good measure (a double steal - Ethan took 3rd, Otto 2nd). Off to a great start – but there is no rest for the wicked in Vegas… one misstep and we’ll lose the next three, Brisky will be asking our legal team to annul another “accidental” marriage, and our quest back to the top of the table will fold like an amateur facing off against Johnny Chan.

In other news… SP Kordell Littles, of your CITY OF COMPTON RAIDERS, got lit up to the tune of 5 runs as our minor league outfit was summarily dismissed from the International League playoffs by the Victoria Royals… they won the game by a score of 10-2, and the series 4 games to 2. OH HONG went 2 for 21 during the series. Let’s hope he gets himself a good nutritionist and trainer during the offseason.


157 of 162: Michael Brisk (13-10, 3.48) @ Al Van Wilder (1-1, 3.34)
Loss, 5-3. It’s only fitting that Al Wan Wilder (pictured), a man whose party-boy reputation rivals that of Brisky, would get the win in their first-ever head-to-head matchup. Both put forth ho-hum performances, but Al only allowed 3 to Brisky’s 4… we had our moments, a slick 3-2-3 double play in the bottom of the 8th saved a run, and we had our chances, Otto at the plate, bases loaded, the bottom of the 9th with two outs on the board (he whiffed), but failed to capitalize when we needed it most. On a side note… the Outlaws had the roof closed, obviously, but I do believe that they had the thermostat set to 85 in the visiting clubhouse – I have half a mind to request an investigation, but we have two more days in town and I don’t want to end up in a hole out in the desert somewhere so I’ll probably just check out the seafood buffet at the Bellagio tonight instead. They’ll probably be out of crab by the time I get there, though.

158 of 162: Cole Guzman (12-8, 3.93) @ Cam Murphy (11-17, 4.45)
Win, 7-5. Arnold Webster came up big – 3 for 4, with a 2-run double, and a run of his own – Otto scored 3 times, and Pepper Grant brought two in on his 31st double of the year. The pitching, for either club, wasn’t great, but our two doubles and an Ethan hit home run got the job done in this one. Now, we just need one more to make this trip a rip-roaring success – one where we went deep into the bowels of the world’s shadiest casinos and still came out smelling roses.

159 of 162: Tommy Mathieu (7-5, 1.95) @ Jack Snachez-Flores (10-10, 4.35)
Win, 9-1. We smashed them in this one – stormed the castle and razed all the villages on the way… AJ Hinson went 5 innings in relief and kept the Outlaws at bay with 3 Ks and only two hits, Pepper and Mack both hit homers, three doubles for the club (Ethan, Mack, some guy named Justin), and we hit two, two-out RBIs. All systems go, full steam ahead! Castor Troy has been vanquished, his kid is at our house, none the wiser, and all is right with the world once again… 1st place, baby! A full game ahead of these Vegas shysters.

Nothing to say here – the better club won, it was as it should be… I always knew we’d come up looking like a million bucks when all the chips were down. Well, that’s my story at least…

[pauwoo]

Los Angeles Leopards (89-70, .560, 1st NL West) @ San Jose Seals (61-98, .384, 6th NL West)
Our sojourn through the 2076 regular season ends with a set against a team that is widely considered the worst in baseball – we’re 10-5 against them so far, so confidence is high – our confidence is high after that last visit to Las Vegas, our charter clear… we’ll need to truck these guys, win out the 2076 campaign, and stay vigilant if we are to maintain our slim lead in the NL West. That we’ll visit these patsies on our way out the door feels serendipitous, like the stars are aligned… but, we’ve been beaten, handily, by worse during my tenure in Los Angeles so to overlook this squad would be disastrous. This is where re-signing a natural-born leader like Pepper Grant comes into the picture – we’ll need him to keep the guys focused, to not let our arrogance lead to a ho-hum effort. Ours is as good a club as any when it is focused and worse than most when it is not. And, while, on paper, San Jose shouldn’t present us with any challenge, what worries me here is our effort – the easiest way to get beat is to not even consider it as a possibility. San Jose is terrible, true, they have, bar none, the worst offense in the majors – 12th EVERYWHERE – and pair that with a pitching staff that has had its moments even without much run support… it’s something like pairing a box of Franzia’s Sunset Blush with a 16oz container of low-fat, small curd cottage cheese. Look, a set against San Jose should present like a 10-piece jigsaw puzzle, like something our club should easily solve… what gives me pause, however, is that we’ve struggled against poor teams before, we can do so again (our periodic indifference should not be discounted), and when you come into to these things overconfident and self-assured, with the hangers-on whispering in your ear about how great you are, you often wake up on a canvas in Tokyo, looking around the squared circle, wondering what happened while some guy that goes by the nickname ‘Buster’ celebrates gleefully in the neutral corner.

160 of 162: Merl Crawford (11-10, 3.90) @ Prior Balazs (10-11, 3.33)
Win, 5-3. Workmanlike… that’s how I’d describe this one. Nothing fancy. Merl gave us 6 shutout innings, a Zippo Hollins error led to two runners scoring, but that won’t be charged to Crawford’s account. Three doubles (Ethan, Pepper, Aston), a homer (Shepard), a SAC FLY (Sparacino), and two swiped bags for the La La’s in this one. We handled our business in Game 1, and, in what was a nice surprise, we learned that Las Vegas lost to Mexico City by a score of 9–2 as we were heading back to the hotel. That puts us up by two games now… I’ll sleep a bit easier tonight.

Elsewhere: New Orleans punched their ticket to the dance… only one spot left now – Salt Lake and Vancouver are battling for it. Vancouver would seem to have the easier road to the playoffs as they are matched up against the woeful Portland Lagers while Salt Lake is facing off against the already playoff-bound Denver Miners.

161 of 162: Trev Anderson (4-2, 2.61) @ Robert Thomas (1-1, 4.05)
Win, 2-0. Trev was in top form over 5 innings – he allowed one hit, fanned 6, but was lifted after doling out his 4th free pass. No bother, though, as we secured the team shutout here with Logan Zaslavsky getting the hold and Anderson Parker striking out the side in the bottom of the 9th to record his 24th save. The sticks were mostly silent with only Mack’s 1 for 2 performance worth talking about. Or is it? Nah… I mean, whatever, he scored a run, got a couple of free passes… no big deal. What is a big deal is that we’ve sewn it up – this win, coupled with another Las Vegas loss, put us up by 3 games and secured a first-round bye in the 2076 playoffs.

162 of 162: Cole Guzman (12-8, 3.90) @ Bentley Hunt (8-18, 3.94)
Loss, 4-3. This isn’t how I’d have drawn it up – walked off by the worst team in baseball in the last game of the season. Guzman gave a good account of himself here – his 6.1 innings, 1 earned, and 6 K performance would normally be enough to win, but our closer, Anderson Parker, in an uncharacteristically poor performance, gave up a 3-run ding dong to SS Jimmy Potter that sent us off with our heads hung low in shame. Potter is a .199 hitter who’s not known for his power… that’s gotta sting a little bit. That’s not how you want to close out a fine regular season – but, as they say, it is what it is, so we move forward, just never straight. Ethan and Mack both hit doubles, Isaac proved that he can sacrifice his personal stats for the team with a SAC FLY, and no one got hurt… so, we have that going for us.

Elsewhere: The Vancouver Bears secured a playoff spot with a tie-breaking, 3-1 win over the Salt Lake Alpines… and have now earned the right to get bounced out during the wild card round of the playoffs. Or, they could win the whole thing – who knows, stranger things have happened. Hell, Portland did it in 2063, entering the playoffs on an 82-80 record and eventually defeating the heavily favored Brooklyn Atlantics in 7 games.


Securing the first-round bye is huge, no doubt, but we will have our work cut out for us with a likely series against our arch-nemesis Las Vegas, and assuming that we can get by them, a likely battle against the Philadelphia Patriots will follow. Then, should we navigate those rough seas, the likely opponent would be the 102-win Seattle Metros, that rare power-hitting team whose pitching staff is as good at getting outs as its offense is at hitting bombs. 193 dingers (1st overall), 3.53 FIP (3rd overall), and an outlandish +191 rDiff. They’re the real deal, a tough test for anyone. Side note: 1B Arnold Webster won the HR race with 43 jacks and SP Tommy Mathieu finished second in ERA at 2.20… Philadelphia’s Palmer Parker won the batting title with a .347 AVG and Phoenix’s SP Landon Sampson (pictured) led the majors in K’s at 300 – he’s led the NL in this category 6 straight years, topping 300 in 5 of those. Also, his ERA of 1.54 is a new league record, topping SP Toichi Enomoto’s 1.66 ERA from 2009… a 67-year old record smashed. Toichi was a 9-time Pacheco winner and 11-time all-star whose resume is only missing an ever-elusive world championship. He led the league in wins 8 times, ERA 7 times, and topped 20 wins 6 times (he won 24 TWICE)… the man is a legend, and now it looks like Landon may be as well. We'll send our congrats out to Landon, but, let's be clear, nothing excuses his choice in facial hair stylings... nothing.


Oh, and the Leopards own, RF Mack Ramirez, won batter of the month in the National League... the 24-year-old Los Angeles right fielder hit .373 with 10 home runs, 20 RBIs and 22 runs scored. The pride of Lemon Grove, California had himself a nice second half in a Leopards Kit -

Check out the bracket … we’re likely doomed.

[pauwoo]

2076 Playoffs (Wildcard Round)


The Vancouver Bears advanced with a 2-0 series win on the road against the Denver Miners… RF Reading Minor hit .857/.875/1.286 with a homer and 2 RBI’s for the winning club. He hit .291/.382/.596 with 14 homers and 37 RBIs in 64 games for Vancouver. He was called up from Kelowna in June and hasn’t looked back since… the Virginia Beach Captains won their best of three against the Montreal Alouettes 2 games to 1 in no small part due to the efforts of RF Ford Pigott who went 6 for 10 with a homer and 2 RBI during the series – Ford hit .262 in Virginia Beach this year and only hit 6 HRs over his 145 games played, so some timely power from the young man here… In the surprise hit of the summer, the Phoenix Coyotes quickly dispatched the, suddenly, ice-cold Las Vegas Outlaws two games to nil and got a great series from 2B Scott Kaszuba who hit .500 over the course of those games and gave the Outlaws staff fits…New Orleans won a nail-biter against the Brooklyn Atlantis, two games to one, and got clutch performances from C John Matsui (pictured) and SS Billy Brown to punch their ticket to the divisional round. So, 3 of 4 road teams won their wildcard series… ok, makes perfect sense.

Looks like we’ll get Phoenix in the 2nd round, hardly a consolation prize… we had an 11-7 record over them in the regular season, which I like, but the playoffs are something else – anything can happen here and often does.

[pauwoo]

Wednesday, October 7th, 2076
Phoenix Coyotes (2-0) @ Los Angeles Leopards (0-0)
Facing off against Landon Sampson in the first game of the Divisional Round is hardly ideal. Like everyone else, we haven’t hit him well, though we did hit 5 homers off him in the regular season, with two of those belonging to clubhouse leader PEPPER GRANT. So, if nothing else, we have a punchers chance. The book on Landon reads, “Landon Sampson is a short (5 foot, 9 inches of lean steel and sex appeal) who was acquired by the Phoenix Coyotes in the 1st round of the 2067 draft. He throws FIVE pitches, with his signature pitch an elite curveball. His strike-throwing ability and movement of his pitches will limit the long ball (will it, though?) and he has the stuff to generate swings and misses. Sampson’s truly one of the elites and should be in the Victor Pacheco Award conversation year in and year out”. So, basically, given Crash’s scouting report, and backed by our dismal performances against him this year, this will be a tough start to the series for us… add to that the pressures of a home playoff game contested in downtown L.A., with the movie stars, models, and card-carrying members of the Illuminati out in force, our mettle will surely be tested. Listen, day-drinking is rarely a good decision, it’s a particularly poor decision before a game like this, but, if you’re not washing down a bowl of migas with a double mojito then you’re not trying very hard…




Game 1: Landon Sampson (3-0, 0.43 versus LA in the Regular Season) @ Tommy Mathieu (1-2, 1.08 versus Phoenix in the Regular Season)
Win, 2-1. We’d open the game with a walk, an error, and a 19 pitch effort from our starter, Tommy Matthieu – tentative, sketched out, and not looking a lot like the cocksure club we worked our way into being during the 2nd half of September – not ideal – but, in the bottom of the frame, with Landon in full-on Kershaw mode, we’d reach on a leadoff single from Ethan and follow that up with a 2-run dinger from LF Andy Shepard… an early 2-OH WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING cushion for the good guys. Phoenix, to their credit, got some get back in the next frame, Clifton Mars hit a double, stole 3rd, and was brought home by a well-hit single from 2B Tony Zepeda – and, just like that, this pitcher’s duel was starting to take on a different light… Landon would settle down, of course, recording 9 Ks through 5 frames, and settle into something of a groove. We’d chase Sampson out during the 6th, after drawing two straight walks, and continue to walk the tight rope from there, closing this one out in the top of the 9th on a 3-4-3 double play to take the 1st game of the series and drop an L on Landon for our first time in 2076.

This was a welcome surprise - I guess it's migas and mojitos for breakfast every day going forward... I choose to believe that my breakfast choice is the reason we won, and so it is...

[pauwoo]

2076 Playoffs (Divisional Round)
Phoenix Coyotes (2-1) @ Los Angeles Leopards (1-0)
This wouldn’t be LA without scandal and we wouldn’t be the Leopards without Brisky in the fold… your boy was photographed late last night, with a supermodel on each arm, wearing a pair of leopard print tights (him, not them) by TMXYZ. This guy… not sure what to do with him – here he is, about to start in one of the biggest games of his life, and instead of getting a good night’s sleep he’s out gallivanting with a couple of runway models, smuggling plums in a pair of way-too-tight leopard print pants, and carrying on like he hasn’t a care in the world… and who knows, maybe he doesn’t. Hell, it was only two seasons ago when I bailed the guy out of jail in Mexico City, so he could start a game for us – he twirled a complete game, 2-hit shutout that night – and he was none the worse for wear. He’s a legend, no doubt, a real, true-to-life Magnum PI / Charlie Sheen hybrid sent here from outer space to seduce women and win ballgames. His opposite here, starting for Phoenix, is no slouch though – we’ll need Brisky to shake the sheets and come up tossing bee-bees if we are to get a game 2 win with Matthew Townsend on the hill. We haven’t exactly struggled against the guy this season – Pepper and Zippo are both hitting .400+ against the guy – but if experience tells us nothing else, some guys dial it in with their backs against the wall and some guys don’t. Townsend’s got good stuff, even if his secondary pitches leave a bit to be desired, and is a battle-tested, 13-year vet with a 2074 championship under his belt. He’s been here before, knows what it takes, and is, undoubtedly, motivated to put his best foot forward against us in game 2.




Game 2: Matthew Townsend (0-2, 6.38 against LA in the 2076 Regular Season) @ Michael Brisk (2-1, 2.01 against Phoenix this year)
Win, 5-4. Brisky started off a bit sluggish here – he gave up his first hit to Scott Kaszuba on his 3rd pitch of the game, a nice little bloop just out of our second baseman’s reach – but struck out the next guy, picked Kaszuba off, and followed that up with another K to get out of the frame unscathed… must’ve been a good night last night, I guess. Otto opened up the scoring in the bottom of the first with a solo homer that traveled 411 feet, but Brisky followed that up by surrendering two infield singles followed by a 2-run double to 2B Tony Zepeda, and, just like that, Phoenix had their foot on the gas… nothing doing though as we’d grab the lead back a couple of innings later when SS Ernie Sparacino hit a 2-run single to give us our 1-run lead back. Unfortunately, or not given how this one ended, Phoenix was able to claw their way back and regain their lead in the top of the 8th, but, in the end, 1B Arnold Webster had the last laugh as the reigning HR champion sent a 2-run, moonshot ding dong over the fence for the dramatic, awe-inspiring, and, sure to be entered into LA folklore, walk-off game-winner. That trade, in retrospect, may have been my finest moment as the General Manager for these Los Angeles Leopards.

Up 2-0 and headed to Phoenix... we're off on the good foot so far and looking for trouble...

[pauwoo]

2076 Playoffs (10/10 – 10/12)
Los Angeles Leopards (2-0) @ Phoenix Coyotes (2-2)
The last time we were in Phoenix, we had our asses handed to us, were outscored 24-8 over three games, and were sent back to Los Angeles with our tail stuck firmly between our legs. Guzman, who will get the start in the first of three games, got lit up and took the loss after giving up 7 hits and 3 runs in 4.2 innings of work. Their sticks were righteous, their pitching, fierce, and their defense could do no wrong. And, it’s not that the Coyotes were any better at home than they were on the road, that their fans lifted them whenever someone dared to enter their house – hell, even we were 6-4 against them in their house over the course of the season – but, on that last trip, in early September, they showed some mettle, made sure we understood what they were capable of. That’s the scary bit – the players on our club have no appreciation for history, context and the bigger picture don’t factor into their mindset… it’s all 'what have you done for me lately' because these young, coddled millionaires can only see so far beyond their own nose. The recent past is weighted too heavily and anything from August or before is too far removed to factor into how we approach this series. That’s good & bad… good, because our guys may come in hot, looking for some get back, and bad because focusing too heavily on our recent misfortune in Phoenix may wind us up too tight – we need to keep it light, loos, and airy if we want to take care of our business while in town. If we can’t do that one simple thing – keeping it loose and fun – then this thing may spiral out of control so quickly that, before we even understand what happened, we’ll be on a plane, headed back to the City of Angels, down 3-2 in a series we should have closed out already.

Game 3: Cole Guzman (2-1, 3.12 against PHX in 2020) @ Liam Anderson (2-0, 3.75 against LAL in 2020)
Loss, 6-7. We’d score our first run on a bases-loaded walk in the top of the 2nd – taking full advantage of Liam Anderson’s early control issues – but, they answer back with some authority on a solo HR from LF Matthew White followed by a 2-run dinger from 2B Tony Zepeda. They’d follow that up with 3 more runs in the bottom of the 4th and, just like that, recent history was repeating itself. We’d come storming back a bit – mostly behind a stellar day from Otto – 4 for 4, a homer, a double, and 3 RBIs – but were unable to get ourselves all the way thereafter a disastrous first four innings. Cole took the loss, as he should, on a 3.2 inning performance that saw his allow two HRs and 7 earned on 5 hits and 2 walks. Pepper managed to get a hit, Ethan went 0 for 3 with two walks and a score, and Arnold Webster went 0 for 4 with 2 Ks and left 4 runners stranded.

Elsewhere: The Seattle Metros lost to Vancouver by a score of 9-5 and failed to record the Divisional Round sweep. So, they are human – good to know.

Game 4: Trev Anderson (1-0, 2.84 against PHX in 2020) @ Mark De La Cruz (0-0, 0.00 – we’ve never even heard of this guy before today)
Win, 8-7. We’d win a barnburner here, riding Otto’s coattails to secure the game 4 victory and put ourselves one win away from the LCS. Otto, for his part, went 3 for 4 with TWO HOMERS, 5 RBIs, and 3 scores, Webster hit his 2nd jack of the series and drove two in, and Ethan put a couple of hits on the board and scored. Our bullpen struggled – three made an appearance and each allowed a couple of runs to plate. A fielding error from Hamza McDonnell led to four of our eight runs… we did the dirt here – gifted a win by a boneheaded infield miscue.

Elsewhere: Seattle, looking none the worse for wear, closed out their series against the Bears, in Vancouver, by a score of 9-1. It’s hard to see anyone beating those guys.

Game 5: Tommy Mathieu (1-2, 1.08 against PHX in 2020) @ Landon Sampson (3-0, 0.43 against LAL in 2020)
Loss, 2-0. Landon put a 6 inning, shutout on the board and fanned 11 batters before handing it off to the pen, who came through with more of the same – outpitched, outmanned, and outgunned here folks… LF Andy Shepard went 0 for 4 and fanned four times, Otto went 0 for 3 with 2 K’s, and our only hits came from Webster, who’s batting .319 so far in this series, and Zippo (.063 so far). This isn’t how we drew it up… I’ll sit down with our Skipper, Michael Scott, and talk strategy on the way home – see if we can’t come up with something snappy. Or, maybe I’ll forgo that, and sit next to our hitting coach, Darryl, to see if he knows what the problem is. I mean, obviously, Landon was the problem, but I wouldn’t mind hearing his take.

I’d like to say that I’m surprised, that this poor set in Phoenix is just an aberration, baseball’s way of keeping you honest – but, that wouldn’t be accurate. The simple fact is that we should’ve closed it out here but were too much in our own head, wound too tight in our quest for revenge, to let the game come to us. Otto has been otherworldly so far in this series - .471/.526/1.235 with 4 HRs, and 9 RBI – but, after that, the drop-off has been steep… Ethan, Pepper, Mack, and Zippo are all batting below the Mendoza line and our pitching – especially that of Julen Morales and Cole Guzman – has been poor. We’re headed back home only one win away from punching our ticket to the LCS with our confidence shaken and the good vibes drying up.

[pauwoo]

Phoenix Coyotes (4-3, 1-2 OTR) @ Los Angeles Leopards (3-2, 2-0 AH)
We’re back in L.A. and, after a day off to collect our thoughts, are as ready as we’ll ever be to face the Coyotes. We’ll have Brisk on the hill, a man whose greatest strength (that he never gets nervous) may also be his biggest weakness, and we’ll need him to have superior command over each of his three pitches… a tall order against a Coyotes lineup that seems to be hitting their stride. If we can just stay calm, focused, and play like we mean it this should be a winnable closeout game – but, that wouldn’t be our style. We have a tendency to take the road less traveled this season, not because it is the correct path, but because it looks more fun and our guys want to see what the 4-wheel drive can do. Now would be a great time to buck that trend, to find and take the most efficient route to victory – and they are plentiful for us. The reality here is that we are the better club and we should win this series… but that hasn’t stopped club, many who were much better than us, from fizzling out at the end and not living up to their potential… so, why should we be any different?



Game 5: Matthew Townsend (0-2, 6.38 Vs LA during the regular season) @ Michael Brisk (2-1, 2.01 Vs PHX during the regular season)
Win, 5-1. The guys came out of the gate hot… Otto drove in a run in the bottom of the 1st and Dom cracked a 2-run moonshot in the same frame to take the early 3-0 lead and we’d get a couple more before all was said and done. Brisky was stout over 5.1 innings of work and a managed to work his way out of a couple of jams before handing it off to the bullpen (the 4 K’s were nice, could’ve done without the 3 walks though), Otto went 2 for 4 with a double, a homer, 2 RBI, and 2 runs, Webster scored, and Zippo put a SAC BUNT on the board. Three doubles, two homers, and three 2-out RBI for the club tonight – that’s how you get after it in a closeout game.


Otto Isaac was instrumental in the series win and was given MVP honors - .476/.522/1.286, 5 HR, 11 RBI for the 2075 Boyce recipient.

With New Orleans jumping all over Philadelphia’s SP Josiah Weber early in their 6th game and securing a 5-1 win in the closeout game, it looks like we’ll be spending some time in the Bayou next. Neither of the teams I predicted we would face has managed to survive and advance through the playoff bracket – which either means that I have no idea what I’m doing or that baseball is a fickle mistress… or both. It’s definitely both. In 9 head-to-head matchups against the Gators during the regular season, they won 7 of them… suffice it to say that I’d rather see any team in the National League over these guys. This will, undoubtedly, be our toughest test of the season so far. We’ll need to dig deep, find a gear we didn’t know we had, and run those RPMs so far in the red that we’ll either find some power we didn’t know our engine had or blow a gasket. There is no middle ground here. None.

[pauwoo]

New Orleans Gators (6-3, 5-0 OTR) @ Los Angeles Leopards (4-2, 3-0 AH)
That New Orleans managed to free climb their way to the League Championship Series shouldn’t be a huge surprise – unlikely given the rock face they had to scale this season and made all the more difficult given the injuries they’ve had to overcome, but, obviously, not impossible. Quirky ownership aside, the Gators have one of the most balanced clubs in the majors with an esprit de corps that makes the rest of us look dysfunctional by comparison. Each piece fits snuggly to the next with well-defined roles and a charter that requires each player to stay in their lane. The Gators are that dark horse marching band who are headed to state where coordination, dedication, practice are the critical components of their success. They are short on soloists, their baton twirlers keep it simple, avoiding the triple-lindy that has become commonplace in favor of the more basic double-knuckle pop… what they lack in individual skill they make up for in synchronicity. You won’t find a tighter, more in sync marching band in Louisiana… led by the consistency of SP Luc Felix and his devastating changeup and the sweet swing of 2B Telma Taveras, this is a club that will lull you to death before finishing you off with drum sequence that would rattle your brain. And, they’re hot right now – all impeccable timing, balanced crankshaft, and just enough rotational energy to jump off the line without laying too much rubber down. The fact is that they are the one & only club that completely dominated us in the regular season, we have the makings of a catastrophe here.



Game 1: Joseph Thompson (2-0, 3.15 Vs. LA) @ Cole Guzman (0-0, 0.00 Vs. NO)
Loss, 7-6. Arnold Webster would break the ice in the bottom of the 2nd frame with a solo dinger after we watched Cole walk a tight rope in the top of the 1st & 2nd – 2 hits and runners at 1st & 3rd during both innings for Guzman… Otto would follow Webster’s at-bat with a solo dinger of his own, back-to-back jacks for the La La’s! But, in the end, New Orleans put their resiliency on display against us once again and just kept chipping away until LF Isidro Lutz put us to bed with a 2-run HR off Anderson Parker to put us to bed… all tucked in for storytime with our night light on in the corner in case we get scared.

Tough loss. I felt like we were in control most of the way, even as the Gators kept finding ways to keep it close. Their lineup behaved like one long drumline, marching lockstep and keeping time better than a 19th-century cuckoo clock, until hitting us in the face with a percussive crescendo in the form of Isidro’s 2-run moonshot. So, while the city of New Orleans plans an impromptu parade (a game one win is as good an excuse as any, I suppose), I’ll be Velcro’d to my couch, a bottle of Jack only an arm's length away, drunkenly fielding text messages from Phil and trying out my best excuses for our setback here. I’ve eliminated all of the Tony Chachere Creole Seasoning from my spice rack, smashed my Zydeco record collection against the wall (they make for surprisingly true frisbees), and will forever skip, “Last Gang In Town”, each time I drop the needle on Give ‘Em Enough Rope (actually, I won’t - that’s a brilliant track). Tomorrow we will find ourselves in a must-win situation, our resolve will be tested, and, should we fail, our route to victory will become impossibly steep.

[pauwoo]

New Orleans Gators (7-3, 6-0 OTR) @ Los Angeles Leopards (4-3, 3-1 AH)
This is what the end of my career as General Manager of the Los Angeles Leopards looks like. At home and already down 1-0 in the League Championship Series with Luc Felix taking the mound against us. Felix has thrown 22.2 consecutive scoreless innings against us this season, including one of the two no-hitters thrown in 2076. So far this season, he’s fanned us 22 times, kept his defense fed with 25 grounders, and has surrendered only 9 hits. Basically, he’s Nikolai Zykov and we’re his marionettes… expertly controlled and made to do his bidding. Tonight – live & in Hi-Def Real-Time Supermarionation – the world (or at least a substantive percentage of the US Population) may witness our demise. Or, maybe we win… maybe we break free of our strings and bat this guy around a little bit, put some bad ones on him, and walk out of here with the W… I mean, I wouldn’t hold my breath, but stranger things have happened.



Game 2: Lux Felix (3-0, 0.00 Vs. LAL in 2076) @ Tommy Matthieu (1-1, 2.37 Vs. NO in 2076)
Win, 6-3. A Pepper Grant 2-run dinger in the bottom of the 2nd would bring across the first two runs we’ve charged to Felix’s account in all of 2076 - some early revenge for the yellow caps made even sweeter given the fact that they were his first RBIs so far in the postseason – and we’d get another on a well-hit grounder from Dom before closing out the frame. Unfortunately, New Orleans would come roaring back in the top of the 4th scoring two runs on a 2-run homer and another on a run-scoring double before we’d get our turn at the plate. A double from Dom would bring Pepper home in the bottom of the 7th to put us back up by one, and solo shots from Otto and (you guessed it) Dom would pad our lead by two more in the bottom of the 8th… and that would do it as Anderson Parker picked up his 3rd save of the postseason… knotted up and headed back to New Orleans!

Well, that went better than I thought it would… it might be some of the best, most resilient baseball our club has played so far this year. It’s a good sign, showing that, with our back pressed firmly against the wall, we have the in-fighting chops to hold our own in the phone booth long enough to get the action back to the center of the ring where our footwork will have an opportunity to shine. We have a long way to go here, against a club that has had our number all season… we’re not out of the dark yet, our flashlight’s batteries are drained, and we’ll have to feel our way along the cavern walls to find our way back into the light. After tonight, as challenging as it will undoubtedly be, I like our chances.

[pauwoo]

Los Angeles Leopards (5-3, 1-2 OTR) @ New Orleans Gators (7-4, 1-3 AH))
We’ve made two trips to New Orleans this year - we play 9 games against each club in the NL East, 6H/3A or 3H/6A. On the first trip, I went with a Fried Shrimp Po' Boy for lunch before the first game of the set and Luc Felix no-hit us. And to add insult to injury, they swept us. The next time we were in town, I went with a Fried Oyster Po’ Boy and we managed to get a win but lost the next two. This time, I’m going with the Peacemaker - half fried oysters, half fried shrimp... I think that two negatives will equal a positive here. Or, I’m hungry. We’ll have Brisky on the bump and while he’s been far from otherworldly for us in the postseason, the guys play well behind him and he keeps it close enough for us to not have to rely on the pen too early. That’s key here as we’ll have Cole starting during the set and, with the way he’s been pitching, well need those arms to stay as fresh as possible. Best case scenario - Brisk eats 7 innings for us and the guys do enough to get a W...



Game 3: Michael Brisk (1-0, 0.79) @ Dylan Tuyay (1-1, 3.94)
Loss, 3-1. Brisk held the Gators scoreless over 5.2 innings but Anderson Parker blew his second save of the series during the bottom of the 8th after giving up a 2-run jack & solo homer, respectively. Three doubles and eight total hits for the club weren’t enough to come away with the win as we were also fanned 14 times and left 7 runners stranded… We mostly outplayed New Orleans in this one, but, when the chips were down, Telma Taveras and Jeremy frickin' Glickstein stood tall for Louisiana and ripped the victory right out of our hands. It turns out that the Peacemaker Po’ Boy was as cursed as the others – I’m not sure what I should do for my pregame meal at this point. Protein shake? Gelatinous goo? A Hot Ham & Cheddar from Parkway Bakery?

On an evening when the Seattle Metros celebrate their sweep over the Virginia Beach Captains, ours is a more contemplative mood. The visiting clubhouse is quiet as the guys silently shower up before boarding the shuttle back to the hotel, no one is making eye contact, and Pepper is in the back corner doing his level best to talk Otto out of throwing a temper tantrum. Down 2-1 with two games left to play in the Big Easy is far from ideal. These guys have had our number all year, they know it, we know it, everybody knows it. We can’t go about it business as usual – we need guys to step up, we need Zippo, who fanned three times tonight, to snap out of his slump and at least hit his weight, we need Pepper to be even more vocal on the bench, and we most certainly need Anderson Parker to regain command of his slider. We need one win to get this thing back to LA – just one – and we need to get it tomorrow because I can’t afford to go on another bender in New Orleans… the last time that happened, I joined a ragtag Rougarou hunting outfit and got lost in the Bayou until Phil sent a team of mercenaries to come and find me. By the time those guys pulled me out of the swamp, my newly adopted accent was so thick that I had to take accent reduction classes online for the next six weeks. Don’t get me wrong – I believe in, and will one day play an important role in the capture of, the Rougarou… just not now, not with so much baseball left to be played.

[pauwoo]

Los Angeles Leopards (5-4, On Road: 1-3) @ New Orleans Gators (8-4, At Home: 2-3)
Heading to the ballpark for game 4 and I’m not at my best – I managed to stay out of the hooch but had trouble sleeping. Each time I found myself on the verge of capturing some Z’s the voodoo ceremony scene from Angel Heart would play itself out and frighten me back to consciousness, drenched in a cold sweat, and wondering what time it was. And, after a simple breakfast and skipped lunch (my best bet at this point), I arrived at the park tired, hungry, and disagreeable. We have a lot riding on this game – a 3-1 hole would prove too difficult to climb out of I’m afraid – and will start Trev Anderson in the contest. This will be his first time facing off with New Orleans – a clean slate – and your guess as to how well he’ll hold up is as good as mine. Trev’s got good stuff, he’s young and full of misplaced confidence, but his control can be an issue and he has a tendency to gas out pretty early as a result. If working, his splitter and forkball should give these guys fits early and if he can eat enough innings for us, we’ll have some of our better relievers available to close it out for us tonight. Our Skipper, Michael Scott, has been instructed to leave no stone unturned – this is a must-win, a gotta have it. No more meetings in the makeshift conference room, no more railing against our HR department – tonight we’ll need him focused and ready to close the deal on a game four victory.



Game 4: Trev Anderson (0-0, 1.59) @ Joseph Hinder (2-0, 0.64)
Loss, 3-1. Trev Anderson acquitted himself nicely over 5.1 innings of work where he allowed only three hits and two runs while fanning three… his three walks and their two runs scored during the bottom of the 6th were his undoing though. Isidro Lutz and Jeremy Frickin’ Glickstein both put balls over the fence for the Gators, we did nothing of the sort – we, instead, left 9 runners stranded and fanned 16 times with each of New Orleans’ 4 pitchers retiring at least one batter by strikeout. Their Closer, Don Haag, K’d our entire side during the top of the 8th and 9th frames… 3 up, 3 down, wash, rinse, repeat. That’s six consecutive Ks for the guy. SIX. Four of our guys – Mack, Andy Shepard, Webster, and Sparacino – all K’d three times. Four of our guys were also fired. Forever. Or, they will be if/once we lose this series.

When I drew this one up – charted it out on a swamp-specific nautical map – the picture I completed looked much, much different than the reality we currently face. Where my sketch showed joy and celebration, our reality is bleak and foreboding. We’re on the precipice of an epic failure, the type of meltdown that gets played for years on ESPN Classic complete with baseball pundits offering their take on what led to our demise. I’m sure my name will be thrown into the conversation – and, it should be. I built this club and it is looking like the pieces we have assembled may not have fit. And, it should be noted that while being down 3-1 is not the end of the world, a comeback is possible (lesser clubs have done it), the way we lost this one in dominating fashion is enough to decimate a team’s confidence. If we can’t shake it off and show up tomorrow like we don’t have a care in the world then our fate is sealed… just another favorite dismissed from the 2076 NL playoff bracket.

[pauwoo]

Los Angeles Leopards (5-5, On Road: 1-4) @ New Orleans (9-4, At Home: 3-3)
Here we go – one game to rule them all – we’ve dropped twelve of our best marbles into the circle and are ready to put them all on the line in a game of keepsies. I can’t say that I have a good feeling about this one – our shooters haven’t consistently rolled true and when they do, we haven’t had enough power behind them to claim any new cat’s eyes for our bag. Should we be dismissed here by these New Orleans based upstarts, we’ll enter the offseason with a lot of personnel questions to answer given our inability to get the job done and if the persistent rumors that our owner, Phil Murray, intends to drastically reduce our budget in 2077 are true, it’ll be challenging to do so. I’d like to avoid those decisions for as long as possible – so, a win would be nice followed by a couple more in L.A. – stranger things have happened, just not to us so far…



Game 5: Cole Guzman (0-1, 10.29) @ Joseph Thompson (0-1, 6.43)
Loss, 12-7. We came out gangbusters… a three-run dinger courtesy of the regular season home run king, Arnold Webster, had us off and running early. That New Orleans would answer back in the bottom of the 1st was hardly a surprise but that they continued to clap back at us for the next 5 innings was new. Ethan got a hit and scored, Otto hit his 9th HR of the playoffs, a 2-run shot in the top of the 5th, and even Zippo got a hit and scored. We’d hit a team cycle too with a double (Zippo) and a triple (Shepard) added to the mix… but, still, it just wasn’t enough. The Gators hit FIVE two-baggers, Jeremy Frickin’ Glickstein charged a 3-run ding dong to Alvin Leaf’s account, and, all told, New Orleans outplayed, outpitched, and outscored us at every turn. Such an unsatisfactory and disappointing result here… changes are definitely on the horizon.

The plane ride home is sure to be, umm, challenging… that we fizzled out in the LCS is hardly a surprise – our team showed itself to be a world-beater one game and a doormat the next. Our issue was consistency, especially that of our pitching staff – we’ll be looking to make some upgrades during the offseason there – and our inability to stay focused on the task at hand. When we arrive in Los Angeles, the guys will go their separate ways – Otto to some exotic locale in the South Pacific, Brisky to his ranch in Montana, Pepper back home to American Samoa – while me and my team, the inner circle, will return to the office to make some decisions. We’ll owe Phil a presentation recapping the season – an overview of our financials, some player analysis, and a summary of our goals for 2077. And, assuming we survive that meeting with our jobs intact, we’ll then have to dive back into it and make the changes required to right the ship.

Notes: The Seattle Metros won the World Series over the New Orleans Gators, 4-1. They dominated every facet of the game, outscored New Orleans 24-8, and toyed with them as a barn cat toys with a field mouse. That our fate would have been the same against this PNW juggernaut is no consolation – we’d have liked the chance to bring home our second championship even if the likelihood of doing so was nonexistent. This is Seattle’s 6th Championship, tying them with Portland and Buffalo for 2nd in league history. New Orleans was gunning for their 4th – but, sadly, or not depending on your perspective, there will be no parade for the Gators.

Awards:

• LF Aitor Cubas (SEA) won the AL Boyce Rigg Award, his winning campaign featured a .275 batting average and a .421 on-base percentage this year. In 157 games he piled up 149 hits, 23 doubles, 2 triples, 42 home runs, 104 RBIs, and 127 runs scored. Austin Rollins of the Seattle Metros finished second in the voting, while Patrick Adams of the Seattle Metros finished third.
• LF Palmer Parker (PHI) won the NL Boyce Rigg Award, the top hitter put up a .347 batting average this year, as well as a .422 on-base percentage. He played 159 games and racked up 217 hits, 49 doubles, 1 triple, 36 home runs, 114 RBIs and 102 runs scored. Ray Gerhold of the Las Vegas Outlaws finished second in voting, while Norris Flaherty of the Philadelphia Patriots finished third.
• SP Bradley Hughes (SEA) took home the AL Victor Pacheco Award, the Metros star delighted the hometown fans with a fine 2.34 ERA and 268 strikeouts in 226.2 innings. Hughes surrendered 180 hits and 61 walks and limited opposing batters to a .212 batting average. Norm Rodriquez of the Montreal Alouettes finished second in voting, while Big Burt McElheny of the Salt Lake Alpines finished third.
• SP Landon Sampson (PHX) took home the NL Victor Pacheco Award, he excelled with a 16-6 mark and 1.55 ERA in 33 starts, tossed 209.2 innings, fanned 300 and held opposing teams to a .165 average. Luc Felix of the New Orleans Gators finished second in voting, while Tommy Mathieu of the Los Angeles Leopards finished third.

Leopard Award Winners:
Gold Gloves – Pitcher, Tommy Mathieu (Los Angeles Leopards); Third Baseman, Pepper Grant (Los Angeles Leopards)

Silver Slugger - Catcher, Dominic Cooke (Los Angeles Leopards) -
.267/.344/.438, 484 AB, 17 HR, 1 SB, 121 wRC+, 4.0 WAR; First Baseman, Arnold Webster (Los Angeles Leopards) -
.268/.350/.540, 593 AB, 43 HR, 20 SB, 111 R, 150 wRC+, 6.7 WAR

Other Notes:

• Ethan Mullens has decided to opt-out of the remainder of his current contract. He will test free agency. It’s a test that he will likely pass. With flying colors.
• Phil Murray dropped our budget by $23 million.
• RHP Trevor Dotson was ranked the #3 prospect in baseball and 1B Oh Hong was rated 8th.
• We have a TON of arbitration-eligible players, including Otto.
• SP Tommy Matthieu will be a free agent… we’re currently paying him $28-mil. We won’t try very hard to keep him.

[pauwoo]

March 9th, 2077
We’re gluttons for punishment – trading in our break from everyday baseball for baseball every day. We’ve stayed busy in the offseason – we managed to keep our offensive core together (we lost Zippo to Montreal via free agency, though), re-imagined our bullpen (now a mixture of crusty vets and young guns), and, really, don’t look that much worse for wear. Mathieu went to Dallas via free agency, so we’ve lost our ace, but… our lineup should crack, our defense remains stout, and our pitching, all things considered, looks to be a tick above serviceable (though, with Brisk serving as our Ace we are likely asking for trouble).

Summary of Roster Moves:

• 2B Zippo Hollins becomes a free-agent. He signed a 3-year, $55 million-dollar deal with Montreal.
• SP Tommy Mathieu becomes a free-agent. He signed a 3-year, $102 million-dollar deal with Dallas.
• LF Andy Shepard becomes a free-agent. He signed a 1-year, $6.9 million-dollar deal with St. Louis.
• Signed CF Ethan Mullens to a 1-year contract extension worth a total of $14,500,000.
• Signed CF Otto Isaac to a 1-year contract extension worth a total of $19,800,000.
• Signed 1B Arnold Webster to a 1-year contract extension worth a total of $8,900,000.
• Traded 28-year-old starting pitcher Cole Guzman, 31-year-old reliever Arlo Alverson and 22-year-old minor league second baseman Sam Kilgour to the Brooklyn Atlantics, getting 27-year-old starting pitcher Case Tunnell, 25-year-old reliever Jan Hernández and 24-year-old minor league closer Yong-Sun Choi in return.
• Traded 31-year-old reliever Julen Morales to the Las Vegas Outlaws, getting 33-year-old reliever Cory Sterner in return.
• Signed free agent SS Hetereki Ailani to a 2-year contract worth a total of $8,400,000.
• Signed free agent RP Adrian Bae to a 1-year contract worth a total of $3,200,000.
• Signed free agent SP Nick Demmer to a 2-year contract worth a total of $20,000,000.
• Signed free agent RP Saul Guzman to a 1-year contract worth a total of $4,000,000.
• Signed free agent RP Reynaldo Igarashi to a 2-year contract worth a total of $8,500,000.
• Signed free agent RP Grumpy Losito to a 2-year contract worth a total of $5,800,000.

So, certainly not a complete overhaul, and, through free agency, I feel like our bullpen is improved even though some of our new arms are unproven… I’m trusting our head scout, Crash Davis, here, so if they’re not up to snuff he’ll be headed back to the Minors in a coaching role. We have a couple of fireballers in Compton that could benefit from his leadership, I think. Letting Zippo and Mathieu jet via free agency freed up most of the capital we needed to shed, and we were able to trade for players of similar skill at a lower cost. With that being said, the baseball punditry has us picked to finish 2nd in the NL West with Las Vegas making the jump to 1st place… I disagree of course – I have us winning it all in 7 games against the Montreal Alouettes.

[pauwoo]

Side Note: As ever, Strangeverse is a sandbox that I endlessly tinker with… to that end, I’ve added a AA league to the save to give teams another development club to improve their talent pipeline (or not, depends on ownership). I also rebranded several of my AAA clubs to move away from the bootleg concepts I had been using (read: teams from other sports leagues) … so teams like the Hartford Whalers and Seattle Supersonics have been replaced by the Scranton Electrics and Kent Comets. In all, between the IL (AAA) and CL (AA), I now have clubs operating in the USA, Canada, Barbados, Mexico, Cuba, and Puerto Rico. Being a minor leaguer has never been so exotic. I futzed around with the Bush League as well – got rid of Columbia Blowfish in favor of the Tallahassee Tomcats… but that’s about all I did there.

As for my organization… it’s Los Angeles Leopards > Compton Raiders > Inglewood Sentinels. When I finally get around to adding an A team, I'm thinking that Chico would make a good host city... maybe call them the Chico Crusaders? Dunno. Will have to think about it.

Los Angeles Leopards (0-0, .000, t-1st NL West) @ Phoenix Coyotes (0-0, .000, t-1st NL West)
We’ll start the 2077 campaign in the desert against a club that gave us fits in this park, sweeping us once here, in 2076. They don’t look too much different as their management didn’t go crazy in free agency and acted like a middle school boy at his first school dance, hugging the wall, all shifty-eyed, during the winter meetings. The only move of any substance they made was to sign SP Kikuzo Ueno to a 2-year $18 million-dollar contract… they’ll slot him in at 3rd in the rotation, but, from a skill perspective, don’t look a lot different as a whole. They’re expected to finish 3rd on the NL West table, which, if correct, would have them snagging the last wild card spot. They do have the 9th ranked development system, which is nice, but with 117 points separating them and the top-ranked system (Virginia Beach Captains) even that isn’t worth celebrating too much. They’re basically stuck in neutral for now – a good opportunity for the La La’s to get off on the good foot here. It should be smooth sailing after Landon Sampson embarrasses us in the season opener…

1 of 162: Michael Brisk (0-0, 0.00) @ Landon Sampson (0-0, 0.00)
Loss, 5-3. We start off poorly, lose the season opener in a game that was called off during the top of the 8th due to rain, and look on in disgust as Otto & Webster both strike out three times to start the 2077 campaign. Brisky didn’t pitch like an Ace (because he’s not one) – he gave up 4 runs in 4.2 innings of work, Pepper went 2 for 3 and scored, and Ethan swiped a couple of bags. 1B Charlie Hultquist put a bad on us in the bottom of the 5th – with two outs in the books and the bases loaded, he hit a 2-run single that put Phoenix up for good… He gets to be the hero today. Well, him and the rain (we definitely would have secured a come from behind victory if not for the downpour).


Elsewhere: The reigning champion Seattle Metros got the season started off with a bang – LF Aitor Cubas, 2076 Boyce Rigg Award winner in the American League, went 2 for 3 with a homer, 2 RBI, 3 runs, and 2 walks in his clubs 10-3 over the Portland Lagers. Looks like he has designs on putting ‘two-time’ in front of the ‘Boyce Rigg Award winner’ this season…

2 of 162: Merl Crawford (0-0, 0.00) @ Tony Hultquist (0-0, 0.00)
Loss, 4-1. Listen, we’ll be okay, our guys are notoriously slow starters (Otto – I’m looking at you), and this is a marathon, not a sprint… Ahhh, who am I kidding? We’re doomed, I’ll likely get fired, and, clearly, every move I made during the offseason was wrong-headed and stupid – I shouldn’t be running a baseball team, I shouldn’t even run a lemonade stand! Merl allowed 4 over 5 innings of ‘work’, Otto went 0 for 4 and left 3 on base, and Webster added 3 more Ks to his major league-leading total of 6. Dom hit a homer and Mack put two doubles on the board… but no one cares. We’re an also-ran, on pace to go 0-162, and, as far as I am concerned, the laughing stock of the league. I have half a mind to send the entire club down to Compton… give the young guys a crack at it.


Elsewhere: LF Palmer Parker, 2076 Boyce Rigg Award winner in the National League, went 2 for 3 with a 3-run homer and 2 runs in Philadelphia’s 6-1 win over the St. Louis Blue Birds… anything Aitor can do, he can do better.

3 of 162: Case Tunnell (0-0, 0.00) @ Kikuzo Ueno (0-0, 0.00)
Loss, 5-4. Kikuzo played better than advertised, 8 innings of 5-hit ball from the newest edition to the Coyotes roster, and C Titas Baldwin’s 2-run single in the bottom of the 4th would be all Phoenix needed to secure a sweep in the first set of the season. We had our moments… Otto got his first hit (a double) and scored a run, Webster, the reigning HR champ, put one out, and Pepper hit .500 for the series. Our pitching continues to be a problem though – 3.2 innings, 5 earned from Case today. We’re a bit out of sync it seems but, with 6-straight games at home on the horizon, we’ll have some opportunities to right the ship.

We’re one of only three teams to start of the 2077 campaign at 0-3 with New Orleans (that’s what they get) and Salt Lake City joining us at the bottom. That’s not terrible company as both clubs, like us, are better than what they’ve shown so far, but it’s not the start I was looking for. We knew coming into the season that we had some question marks in our starting rotation, but a combined 8.78 starters ERA to start it off was not the answer we were looking for. Tough way to start the season against a division rival – here we are, only three games in, and already with plenty of ground to make up. Just not a good look from the La La’s. Bummer biscuits. In other news… 1B Tom Franzone, of the Pittsburgh Pipers, has already put three balls out of the park – he tops out at ‘legendary power’ on the potential meter and it’s looking like he’s starting to tap into that this season.

[pauwoo]

San Jose Seals (1-2, .333, 5th NL West) @ Los Angeles Leopards (0-3, .000, 6th NL West)
The Seals, like us, are cellar-dwellers, the difference, and this is important, is that they are supposed to be here and we’re just visiting. There’s also an old adage that goes, you’re only as good as your last set - and, well, we were laid to waste in ours while San Jose, for all their lack of baseball might, were able to walk away from theirs with a 1 in the W column. San Jose’s offense looked good to start the season - they put some good wood on the ball, hit a few bombs, found their way to the first bag more than most, and found ways to move guys over even if they don’t always bring them back to the dugout. And, well, we’re not really doing any of those things. We’re hoping that 4 & 5 in the rotation bring something resembling big league caliber pitching acumen to the table before we turn the corner and trot Brisky out for a second shot at a first impression. The hobbled old battle-ax was beat up a bit during his first go this year, but, as ever, I expect that he’s good for it... all this guy needs to stay happy is his lime green Lambo and a sixer of High Life in the fridge - everything else is just window dressing. Let’s just hope that Trev and Demmer get it done for us in the first two games of this set and that Brisky doesn’t slam that sixer back right before game three.

4 of 162: Jeronimo Tucker (0-0, 0.00) @ Trev Anderson (0-0, 0.00)
Win, 3-0. First of all, Jeronimo Tucker is the Strangeverse equivalent of B.A. Baracus and if his facegen is accurate he’s been pitiless to more than a few fools in his day. He acquitted himself nicely here giving San Jose 7.1 inning of 6-hit, 3-run baseball, but Trev, flexing the yellow cap, was better… 7.2, 4 hits, nothing earned or otherwise, and 5 Ks for our #4 who is soon to be our #1. Our offense was still abysmal though – Mack was the whole show with a 3-run jack – but we’ll happily take what we can get here… nice to get a win here, especially in the home opener. At least I won’t get roughed up in the parking lot on my way out to my car, so, I got that going for me.


Jeronimo Tucker pities no fools…

5 of 162: Cuco Verhoeven (0-0, 0.00) @ Nick Demmer (0-0, 0.00)
Win, 7-6. The offense comes alive in the bottom of the 8th with 5 runs scored to put us up by one – we’d get a 3 for 3 day from Dom with a single, a double, a triple, 2 RBI, and a run, Ethan hit a 2-run double in the bottom of the 3rd, secured three hits, and scored twice, and Otto secured his first two RBI of the season on a single in the bottom of the 8th to trigger an LA free-for-all during that frame. Three double plays for the club too, including a 5-3 double up between Pepper and Webster.

6 of 162: Bentley Hunt (0-1, 4.50) @ Michael Brisk (0-1, 7.71)
Win, 11-4. When he pulled up to the stadium, with the UFO blazing and the Lambo freshly waxed, I knew we’d get some vintage Brisky on the bump in this one. And by vintage, I mean a 5-inning outing with 2 earned, and 8 Ks added to the ongoing tally. The real story here, of course, was the offense – we exploded in this one… Mack went 2 for 4 with a GRAND SLAM (I almost don’t even need Otto with this guy around – he’d make good bait for landing an elite pitcher), Otto smacked a couple of hits and scored three times, Webster hit his 2nd long ball, a three-run moonshot, and Ethan drew four walks (that ties our all-time single-game walk record) and scored. Four swiped bags for the club here too – Webster, Otto, Ethan, and Mack did the honors.

Okay, this is more like it… this is the style of LA baseball we were looking for. Unfortunately, it came at a cost as Pepper was hurt after getting hit by a pitch and had to leave the game… diagnosis pending, which in OOTP speak means his hand has probably been smashed to smithereens and he’ll likely be out for two years or more. Up next, we’ll welcome the Las Vegas Outlaws to town for a 3-game set – they were picked to win our division and a sweep here will go a long way if our intent is to disagree with that prediction. They’re our most hated division rival, so, if nothing else, we’ll have our pride on the line.

[pauwoo]

Las Vegas Outlaws (4-2, .667, 2nd NL West) @ Los Angeles Leopards (3-3, .500, 4th NL West)
At 4-2 to start the season, and with their offense already putting their mid-season form on display, the Las Vegas Outlaws are making the analysts at BNN look pretty good so far. After dropping two straight in Austin to start the season, the Outlaws have put together a nice little 4-game streak and will look to keep the good times rolling as they arrive in Los Angeles to take a run at us in a 3-game set. They made a couple of moves over the winter – the first was a trade with us that brought Julen Morales to Sin City where he’ll have an opportunity to start, and the second notable change was signing the often aggro Eloy Delando who gives them a serviceable defense out in left and a power bat at the plate. Injuries are already a low-key problem for Las Vegas again this year – SP Evan Frazier will be out for 2-3 weeks and RP Al Van Wilder will miss 6-7 weeks due to a strained oblique. Really, over the last few seasons, going back to 2074, Las Vegas has had what it takes to be a powerhouse, they just haven’t had the constitution to stay healthy long enough to finish what they’d started. Here we are, in 2077, and the story remains the same – as talented as anyone, but more brittle than most.

7 of 162: Jack Sanchez-Flores (0-1, 9.00) @ Merl Crawford (0-1, 7.20)
Loss, 1-0. Merl gave us 7.1 innings of his best stuff, allowing only 6 hits and one runner to plate, but Sanchez-Flores was just a smidge better over the same stretch in a 4-hit, nothing earned, 8 K performance. The only run scored in the game came on a run-scoring single from Ray Gerhold in the top of the 6th, and, outside of that offensive outburst, our fans were treated to a lot of really poor AB’s, swings & misses, and pitches thrown for strikes. In all, it took three hours and four minutes to sort this one out… most of our fans didn’t ride it out with us and while I’d have liked to join them, as the General Manager of this fine outfit, I had to stick it out… boredom be damned.

Elsewhere: Pepper’s diagnosis came in… broken collarbone, out for ~6 weeks. Gutted for the guy – could’ve been worse I suppose, not sure how, but it could’ve. His replacement, for the time being, will be solid, all-around utility man – Jarel White – who hit a whopping .176 in 96 starts for us last season.

8 of 162: Julen Morales (1-0, 0.00) @ Case Tunnell (0-1, 12.27)
Loss, 6-0. There’s trouble at club paradise – our attempts to present ourselves as the club to follow for our most affluent, money-spending fans have yielded no returns. Who wants to follow a club that consistently underperforms? Julen, the formerly disgruntled Leopard, returned to town and meted out his revenge over 7 innings of 2-hit, lockdown pitching, and 1B Jacob Wells & LF Eloy Delando both put balls out of the park while we did nothing of consequence. Ethan fanned three times, Otto went 0 for 4 with 2 Ks, we left 5 runners stranded, which wouldn’t have been enough anyway, and LF Justin Burton committed his first error of the season. We’re far from firing on all cylinders here… just kind of sputtering along like a Yugo with misfiring plugs.

9 of 162: Brantley Powell (0-0, 0.00) @ Trev Anderson (1-0, 0.00)
Win, 5-1. Otto showed up today, went 1 for 3, and hit a tasty little 3-run ding dong in the bottom of the 8th to give us all the cushion we’d need to low-key salvage this dismal set against Las Vegas. Trev put in another solid performance, backup catcher, Yoshi Nakamura hit a 2-run blast, and we only fanned 2 times as a club. We played okay here, did enough to walk away with a win before heading out on the road for 13-straight, including a 4-game series in New Orleans… we’ll take this win, head off to the airport to fly out to the location of our 2076 collapse, and hope that we can secure some of that sweet, sweet get back while out east.

While Montreal and Vancouver have come off the line like thoroughbreds, we’ve sauntered out of the gates like a mule with an attitude problem. It’s early and there’s plenty of runway left, but should we manage to get this rickety bucket off the ground anytime soon you’d be remiss not to question our ability to get up to an altitude above the hard deck where we can engage our foes in some good ol’ fashioned dogfighting. So far, our offense has been underwhelming with Ethan, Otto, and Webster all making a living below the Mendoza line, and our pitching has been inconsistent, below-average, and often so piss-poor that we may need to rethink our strategy there. And now, after dropping 2 of 3 sets to start the season, we’ll head off to New Orleans to stare our conqueror in the eyes while telling ourselves, over & over under our breath, that we don’t believe in black magic, that those chicken bones don’t mean anything, and that the tarot cards were clearly being dealt from the bottom of the deck.

[pauwoo]

Los Angeles Leopards (4-5, .444, 4th NL West) @ New Orleans Gators (3-6, .333, 6th NL East)
New Orleans is weird in all the ways Portland, OR wishes it was, and in a few that it hasn’t even considered. Four days spent wandering its streets can change a man, so I’ll try to temper my wanderlust and geo-fence the murkier areas as off-limits to the team (I’m looking at you, Brisky). It’s also an opportunity to visit Félicité’s Fortune Telling Jumbo Shrimp Shack where I’ll sample some legendary gumbo, squeeze a reading in, and drop some quarters into the crown jewel of her retro arcade - Journey: The Game. That a nearly 100-year old arcade game works as well as it did the first time it was plugged in is enough to convince me that her voodoo is on another level, so I’ll take my reading with more than a grain of salt... That I left with an upset stomach, murky fortune, and 7-quarters shy of a high score certainly doesn’t bode well for this 4-game parlay against the Gators, but we’ll have to play the games anyways. Plus, when you factor in that my attempt to make the theme of this trip “don’t stop believing’” was met with a collective eye roll from the guys, delivered at a volume that would make my pre-teen daughter stand up and take note, we have a recipe for disaster on our hands here. That New Orleans is off to a start on par with our own is of no real consequence - our guys are checked out, unfocused, and seemingly operating under the assumption that we can turn this thing around whenever we want. That’s just not how it works, and unless we take a good long look in the mirror before the first game of this series, Luc Felix and his merry band of Ne'er-do-well’s will happily give us all the reasons why going through the motions just isn’t going to cut it.

10 of 162: Nick Demmer (0-0, 5.40) @ Thomas Deane (0-1, 5.06)
Loss, 11-1. New Orleans picked up right where they left off with us last year and decimated our club to kick off this 4-game series. So, while Brooklyn was at home celebrating the 100th Anniversary of the Clash’s Self-titled debut with a rebroadcast of Career Opportunities from their Live @ Shea performance during the 7th inning stretch, we were deep in the bayou looking for a way out of the game. Thomas Deane fanned us 8 times, Telma Tavares hit a three-run bomb off Demmer, and Paul Swift hit a pair of two-baggers and drove 3 in. We played another game of highlight free baseball unless your idea of a good time is watching Otto go 0 for 3 with 3 Ks. If that’s your bag, cool, we got you covered.

Elsewhere: Brooklyn, in no small part buoyed by the vocal stylings of Joe Strummer, went on to charge 5 runs to the Outlaws’ account after the stretch and won their game by a score of 8 to 3. Brody Owens’ GRAND SLAM in the bottom of that frame was all she wrote for Las Vegas.

11 of 162: Michael Brisk (1-1, 5.59) @ Luc Felix (0-1, 8.71)
Loss, 5-3. I put Halpert on Brisk duty after last night's game and given that Brisky showed up on time today while Jim was nowhere to be found I was a bit nervous going into this one. Turns out I had every right to be as New Orleans put a thorough beating on the boys here with Paul Swift’s 3 for 3, two, two-baggers, and a HR day leading the way for the Gators. Again, our highlights were few and far between, with Mack fanning 3 times and Otto adding a couple more to his running tally. Webster hit his 3rd jack though… whatever.


Elsewhere: Angry Eloy, of the Las Vegas Outlaws, went 3 for 5 with 3 HOMERS, 6 RBI, and 3 runs in the Outlaws 13-2 destruction of the Brooklyn Atlantics. The former Missouri Tiger now has 7 HRs on the year which is good enough to lead the majors by… three. Also, from BNN, Jan Hernández bent a little, but he didn't break against the Fort Worth Cowboys. The City of Compton Raiders pitcher hurled a 8-hit 5-0 shutout in a fine performance, surrendering 1 walk and tallying 8 strikeouts. Tallying is a good word – I need to put that to use more often.

12 of 162: Merl Crawford (0-2, 3.65) @ Carson Vespa (1-1, 3.00)
Loss, 4-0. Carson Vespa, who entered the game riding, you guessed it, a gator themed Vespa motor scooter much to the delight of the home crowd, pitched a complete game, 2-hit shutout and fanned 10 en route to victory. Paul Swift continued to run roughshod over our pitching with a 3 for 4 day with two, two-baggers and 2 RBI, and we, again, did nothing of note. But in keeping with our theme of being terrible at baseball, we now have 6 of our everyday guys making their living below the dreaded Mendoza line. I wonder if Phil is having my office cleaned out now or if he started that project as soon as we boarded our plane to New Orleans.


Elsewhere: Dimitri Pimentel, of the St. Louis Blue Birds, pitched a complete-game, 3-hit shutout over the Austin Grackles and rung up eight of them during their 7-0 win. Pimentel is now 2-0 on the season, with 8.3 Ks/9, and an ERA+ of 148. The former Aztec of San Diego State is having a nice bounce-back start after two straight years of sub-100 ERA+ seasons.

13 of 162: Case Tunnell (0-2, 11.74) @ Joseph Hinder (0-2, 1.17)
Win, 7-5. We avoided the sweep, which is nice, and got good performances from Otto, who went 2 for 5 with a 2-run bomb, and a couple of runs, and Webster who hit two doubles and a homer. A homer from Mack rounded out the derby, a triple from Hector Espinoza completes the team cycle, and an outfield assist from Ethan rounded out the highlights here… we’ll take it, we have too – we’re basically living off scraps at this point, so any opportunity to get fed is met with a lot of tail wagging and unconditional love.

We’re struggling, shuffling along like a shell of our former selves – once so cocksure and worry-free, we’re now riddled with anxiety and the seeds of distrust in management are actively being sewn. My future in the City of Angels is as sketchy as ever, I haven’t heard word one from Phil, the local media is calling for my head, and my ex-wife just filed to take sole custody of our pet cat, Mr. Shankly. We’ll head north to Ottawa next, where the poutine flows freely, and the attitudes towards our club veer to the negative. My goal here, besides winning a couple of games, will be to gain an audience with their owner, Woody Owens, because, who knows, maybe he’ll be in the market for a failed big city baseball GM in the near future.

[pauwoo]

I needed to do something, anything really, to improve our offense. So, after trying various combinations with several different teams, this was the best I could come up with. In Arthur Grant, we are getting a good bat to add to the lineup, but we lose a bit defensively (he has terrible range in the outfield) and his speed, stealing, and baserunning skills are non-existent. We just need him to hit though. To get him I had to give up our utility infielder, a guy who is capable of playing 3B, SS, and 2B in a pinch, and our first choice off the bench when one of our everyday guys needs a day off. He will be missed. Jarel is the better all-around guy here and 2B Dylan De La Rosa is a solid prospect who should have a productive Major League career. We were able to get Vancouver to throw in a back-up 3rd baseman who we will try not to use too often and a left-handed pitcher in David Beck that looks like a career minor-leaguer who will make a solid Bush League starter one day.

Los Angeles Trades White for Vancouver's Grant: It has been in the rumor mill for several weeks, but today team officials for Los Angeles and Vancouver confirmed an agreement. The Leopards dealt 27-year-old 3B Jarel White and 20-year-old minor league 2B Dylan De La Rosa to the Bears for 27-year-old LF Arthur Grant, 27-year-old 3B Rishon Orosz and 26-year-old minor league LHP David Beck.

Grant enters the lineup immediately and will start out in RF, Rishon will be with the big club until Pepper heals up, maybe longer if he does well enough, and Beck heads to Inglewood to ply his trade with our AA club.

[pauwoo]

Los Angeles Leopards (5-8, .358, 4th NL West) @ Ottawa Senators (5-7, 4.17, 6th NL East)
While their offense has sputtered along since the start of the season, Ottawa’s pitching and defense have looked pretty stout. Their bullpen, where they rank 2nd in ERA, has been particularly stingy and closer Andre Plumley has already earned saves in four of Ottawa’s five wins. Unfortunately, pitching alone won’t get it done for the Senators, and, so far, their offense has shown itself to be as sketchy as ours… 12th in runs and wOBA, 11th in OBP and OPS, and 10th in batting average. Ottawa has been a less than storied franchise over the last 6 seasons, where they’ve hit a high-water mark in winning percentage of .488, have not so much as sniffed the playoffs, and have had trouble keeping their finances in the black. Their owner, interestingly, is a charitable sort of fellow who has funneled a lot of his personal wealth into the club, he stays an arm’s length away from the day-to-day operations, and, as far as I can tell, is in a happy mood. I’m not sure why he would be happy – perhaps he’s clinically insane – as his club has managed to take the 4th highest budget in the league, spend it dumbly, and have come up empty each time a new plan was executed. After a rip-roaring 2060s, when Ottawa made the playoffs in 8 of the 10 seasons and won the title twice, the 2070s have been rough – their front office has been a case study in financial malfeasance, their team has struggled to play .500 ball, and, as a result, we’re starting to see their fan interest start to slip. I like Ottawa, I want them to do well – after this set because we need to do well too.

14 of 162: Trev Anderson (2-0, 0.71) @ Julian Horne (1-1, 1.62)
Win, 3-2. All’s well that ends well… we tied this one up in the top of the 7th and a 2-run home from Leandro Mercedes sealed it at the top of the 9th. Ottawa attempted to make a comeback, but could only squeeze out one run in the bottom of the final frame… New utility guy, and current starter in place of Pepper, Rishon recorded two hits and two runs, Arthur hit a run-scoring double in his only AB, and 5 solid innings from Trev where he allowed only 5 hits and a run while fanning 7.


Elsewhere: C Lester Brown, of the CITY OF COMPTON, went 2 for 3 with 2 dingers, 5 RBIs, and a couple of runs in the Raiders 7-2 win over the Kansas City Wheat Kings. Lester had a so-so season in AAA last year, he hit .258 and put 14 balls over the fence for us, but this is the year we’d expect him to make the leap… he’ll never be our primary Catcher, and, truth be told, it’s unlikely that he’ll hold a roster spot on our big club with any consistency… but, Brown still has some room to grow and could surprise a few folks this season. He’ll be one to keep tabs on, for sure. 1B Oh Hong, currently getting in some work with the Inglewood club, went 3 for 5 with a solo homer and two runs in the Sentinels 7-6 win over the San Juan Leathernecks. I’m not sure why my Assistant GM, Oscar Martinez, has OH HONG assigned to our AA club, but I guess if that’s what the numbers say to do, then that’s what he’ll do… Oscar is our numbers guy. He’s good at interjecting into other people’s conversations to correct them and captains a trivia team in his spare time.

15 of 162: Nick Demmer (0-1, 12.79) @ Teodoro Herrera (0-2, 5.54)
Loss, 5-3. A 3-run blast from Ottawa left fielder Evan Prag put Ottawa up for good in the bottom of the 7th and our attempt at a comeback in the top of the 9th, where we scored one run, fell short as we dropped game 2 in Canada. Mack Ramirez drove two runs in, Sparacino was responsible for the other, and, as a club, we left a staggering 14 runners stranded during this contest as our offense continues to fall far short of its potential. Leandro put up a fun 0 for 0 line with four walks and, unfortunately, starter Nick Demmer left after the first with an injury… back spasms will make him questionable for a week or so. New guy Arthur got another AB as a PH in this one – no hits though. Our Skipper doesn’t like using him against lefties it seems.

Another Trade: Basically, I’m traded a guy who tops out at Ace potential but has a ways to go to get there for a couple of guys who are further along in their development but track to be bottom of the rotation / long relief types in the Majors. Here’s the trade: The Leopards will send 22-year-old minor-league RHP Woodstock Brooke to the Miners for 23-year-old minor-league RHP Dwight Beasley and 21-year-old minor league RHP Ramiro Marte. The deal is expected to be finalized shortly and the clubs will be introducing their new players to the press when the paperwork is complete. Beasley heads out to meet our Inglewood club in San Juan while Marte heads to the International Complex while we assess the best place for him to go this season. Our hope here is that, with plenty of SP prospects in the funnel, these two arms will bolster our bullpen in the not so distant future.

16 of 162: Michael Brisk (1-1, 4.30) @ Paul Pentz (0-1, 3.00)
Win, 5-1. Otto went 3 for 4, hit his 4th ball out of the park, drove two in, and scored to lead the way for the La La’s tonight – finally, we get a series win on the road. That was a long time coming and hardly worth the wait… Ethan collected a couple of hits, Arthur rode the pine again as we faced off against our third consecutive lefty, and we swiped 3 bags as a club. Brisk gave us five innings of 2-hit, 1-run ball (with that one being a solo dinger for Archie Imanov in the bottom of the 2nd), and Grumpy Losito gave us four scoreless innings in relief. The guys were dialed in and managed to put a level of focus on display that we haven’t had in our previous 15 contests.

Elsewhere: CJ Virtue, of the CITY OF COMPTON, went 2 for 4 with the 2 being homers, 3 RBI, and 3 runs on the road in Victoria, B.C. The Raiders won the contest by a score of 7-4 and are now off to a 6-1 start in the International League. The Big Club should be taking notes…

We’ll take a long couple of flights into Mexico City to face off against the Jaguars with an improved attitude and a bit of renewed focus. Fortunately, the guys will have a day off tomorrow to acclimate to their temporary surroundings and should, given that they are finely tuned professional ballplayers, be no worse for wear when the 1st pitch is thrown out on the 16th. The series win in Ottawa was good, we needed it, it was SUPER NECESSARY, but we are not out of the woods yet… our immediate goal will be to steal this set from the Jags before heading up to Austin to close out this long, early road trip. If we can stay focused and make that happen, we’ll be in a great position to climb above .500 at home to close out the first month of the season. I’d like to see us salvage this month as best we can and to do that a series win in Mexico City is where we must start.

[pauwoo]

Los Angeles Leopards (7-9, .438, 5th NL West) @ Mexico City Jaguars (8-8, .500, 3rd NL West)
During our last trip to Mexico City, Leandro Mercedes and Michael Brisk went missing for two days – search parties were created, the local authorities were involved, and we feared the worst. We’d eventually find them at Arena México after confirming the rumors we’d been hearing about a mysterious new tag team that was making waves in the Federacion Universal de Lucha Libre – it seemed that their newly christened ‘Lucha de Equipo y vuelo’ was in the midst of a four-match winning streak buoyed by their contrasting styles… Leandro did his work from the top turnbuckle while Brisky was developing a reputation as a catch-styled leg lock specialist. Fortunately, for us, we were able to convince those two knuckleheads to leave that life and return to baseball just in time Michael’s start – he gave us five, labored innings and got touched up a bit in the 5th but was otherwise unscathed by the athletic diversion. This time, Brisky isn’t scheduled to make an appearance – so, all bets are off… he’ll either behave himself or rejoin the wrestling underworld and suffer a season-ending injury over the next three days. Those are the choices – I just don’t see any middle ground. But I digress… back to the task at hand – in Mexico City, we’re getting an opponent whose offense has helped them to tread water in the early goings of the 2020 campaign. They’re ranked 2nd in average, 3rd in OBP and OPS, and 5th in runs scored… it’s the pitching that has been the let down for the Jags as their arms have struggled to operate with any consistency – 12 in runs against, 11th in starters ERA, 10th in bullpen ERA, and 7th in FIP so far this year. They’ve also lost 5 straight and were most recently swept, at home, by the Philadelphia Patriots in a four-game series. We’ll have our opportunities here and could, theoretically, play our way into a winning record… hopefully, the squad will stay focused on the task at hand and not get swallowed up by all the extra-curricular activities that Mexico City will so generously offer up.

17 of 162: Merl Crawford (0-3, 3.50) @ Lee Myers (1-1, 3.57)
Loss, 9-3. Mexico City’s David Pritcher went yard from the leadoff spot only five pitches into the game – the flood gates were opened here as the Jaguars would charge 4 total runs to our account during the opening stanza… we’ll blame the elevation and our dehydration for the poor start. That Pritcher would do it again in the bottom of the second should give you an idea of what our night started off like in Mexico City… in the end, it was just more of the same, repeated over and over as we got styled on in the first game of this three-game set. We’ve cured all that ails the Jaguars and thanks to our charitable ways, they can now put that 5-game losing streak in the rearview and try to string something snappy together. Arthur Grant got his first hit in a Leopards kit, Webster hit one out and drove in two, and Mack Ramirez would close out the 20-second highlight reel with an OF assist in the bottom of the 3rd when he gunned down Gavin Dawson at 3rd.

18 of 162: Case Tunnell (0-2, 7.42) @ Casey Tucker (2-1, 3.63)
Loss, 9-5. We play the role of the heel once again in this one with Mexico City playing the face who preservers and guts out the win in the end – except, they’d not need to dig deep here as we were, again, summarily dismissed without offering up much in the way of resistance. Heathcote, taking a page out of Pritcher’s book, put two over the fence against us (including a 2-run shot off Case) with 6 RBI, and Tucker twirled 6 shutout innings for the home team. Tunnel gave up 6 runs over 5 innings of work, Mack and Webster both fanned 3 times, and we left 6 stranded as we continue to present the worst of ourselves in 2077. On another note, my accountant sent me an email suggesting that I should diversify my investment portfolio – he added something at the end about paychecks not being guaranteed forever at the end which I did not appreciate.

19 of 162: Trev Anderson (2-0, 1.02) @ Ben McGillicuddy (0-1, 6.94)
Win, 8-7. We’d survive a gonzo, 3 for 4 and 5 RBI, performance from Winslow McMillan and come away with the win. Webster and Mack, in a reversal of fortune, both hit balls out of the park and drove in a combined 4 runs, and we managed to get it done despite a disastrous outing from Trev who allowed 7 runs in only 1.2 innings. The flight to Austin will feel much longer than it actually is after this set and while getting a win after having our asses handed to us in the first two feels nice, we leave knowing full well that we got lucky here and, really, should’ve lost this one too.


Elsewhere: 3B Mercury Alghajari, of the Brooklyn Atlantics, went 2 for 3 with TWO JACKS, SEVEN RBI, and two runs in his clubs’ 12-6 win over Tom Franzone and the Pipers. Franzone, it should be noted, sat this one out for Pittsburgh – they could’ve used his bat in the lineup it seems… Mercury is off to his best start since 2070 when he won his 1st and only Boyce Rigg Award – he’s hitting .395/.440/.921 with 6 HRs and 13 RBI so far in 2077. At 33-years old, and not aging particularly well, Aghajari’s best days are likely behind him, but, every once in a while he’s good for a breakout game that gives fans a glimpse of his former glory.

The version of ourselves that we put on display in Mexico City, like the version of ourselves we’ve put forward so far in 2077, was made even more disappointing after showing a glimmer of what we are capable of in the 3rd game. Our ability to play team-first, top-flight baseball isn’t really in question – it’s our ability to do it with any regularity that is giving us fits. In Austin, against a club that is arguably even worse than us, we’ll have an opportunity to sample some local BBQ, catch some live music, and to get this bus back on the road and going in the right direction… so far we’ve been operating with a faulty GPS system and an outdated road atlas and have veered so far off the beaten path, that getting back to the freeway may cost us another tire or two on the way. I’m hopeful that, once we re-enter the US, my phone doesn’t start buzzing uncontrollably as an avalanche of text messages come in from Phil, the media, and our public relations department. One thing is for sure – if this keeps up, then a pink slip is definitely in my future.