Portland Raccoons (ABL)

[Westheim]

2073 CONTINENTAL LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP SERIES
Portland Raccoons (105-57) vs. Atlanta Knights (105-57)

The Raccoons had a day off for travel and for finding out that Phil LeVan had cracked his elbow in the collision with an Atlanta wall, so he was obviously out for the year, and we were down to three outfielders for the rest of this series, and then the odd emergency assignment like Ronaldo Rivera on the corners or Katz in center (once hell froze over, and only then!). Sam Brown would also get a shot after Contreras went 0-for-9 in Atlanta.

Game 3 – Scott Bickerton (17-10, 3.11 ERA) vs. Andy Canada (18-9, 3.11 ERA)

Bickerton had faced the Knights three times – all while still with the Falcons, and had lost all of those starts, going 0-3 with a 6.61 ERA. Canada had also pitched three times against the Coons, but had rather sparkled, 2-0 with a 1.21 ERA.

The ceremonial first pitch was thrown out by Haji Thulalinglongkorn, affectionally known as “Haj”, the 2073 State Spelling Bee champion.

ATL: CF Ehlers – 3B B. Metz – LF Jo. Soto – C Boudreaux – RF D. Mendoza – 2B Jer. White – 1B M. Medina – SS X. Contreras – P Canada
POR: CF Schneider – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Woodley – RF Markovich – C S. Brown – LF Etienne – 3B Rivera – P Bickerton

Right away, Bickerton tried to get that fourth loss of the year against Atlanta, giving up a single to Ehlers, nailing Metz, throwing a wild pitch, and walking Mendoza with two outs in the first inning, but then Jeremy White struck out and stranded all the runners. It only cost Bickers 31 pitches. Schneider drew a walk, but was doubled up by Yocum in the bottom 1st, and Miguel Medina and Xavier Contreras right away went to the corners with leadoff hits in the second inning. Canada’s bunt was bad and forced out Contreras at second base, and Ehlers and Metz both popped out as the Raccoons kept flirting with an early and hefty deficit.

For the rest of four innings, neither team reached base with less than two outs, or touched third base. Brown and Etienne hit 2-out singles in the second, and Yocum hit a 2-out single in the third, and Bickers inexplicably walked Canada with two outs at some point, but neither team made anything from those opportunities. The first less-than-2-outs batter to reach after the early scoreless drama was Ronaldo Rivera, singling with one out in the bottom 5th. Bickers bunted him over, but Schneider grounded out, too.

Bickerton finished six messy shutout innings on 99 pitches, plus a pop from Canada on his 100th pitch to begin the seventh inning, then was replaced with Chad Brown, who got Ehlers to pop out to short before giving up singles to the 2-3 batters. Toby Boudreaux then flew out to Etienne on the warning track… Rios handled the eighth inning while giving out a 2-out walk to Medina, but the game remained scoreless.

Both teams were on seven hits and no runs through eight innings, once Yocum hit a 2-out single against Canada in the bottom 8th, but Katz lined out to White. Justin Hart then batted for Canada to begin the ninth inning. He singled off Cecere, but two groundouts and a fly out to Schneider kept this runner on base, too. The Raccoons faced Elijah LaBat in the bottom 9th, beginning with Woodley. Him, Markovich, and Contreras made three useless outs, and a scoreless game went to extra innings.

Rule 5 Ron got around a leadoff single by Boudreaux in the tenth inning, getting three straight outs afterwards, while LaBat was still in the game for the tenth, but lost Etienne on balls to begin the inning. Etienne ran on the first pitch to Rivera, but Boudreaux threw the ball away, and Etienne hustled all the way to third base with the winning run and nobody out! Rivera ended up being walked haphazardly after that, and McFarland batted for Rismiller. He hit a fly to left that Soto caught on the slide heading towards the left foul line – but that meant he sat on his tush on the ground and had to scramble up first, giving Etienne more than enough time to jigger home from third base…!

Raccoons 1, Knights 0 (10) – Raccoons lead 2-1

Yocum 3-4;

Not a lot to shout about in this game, but at least it went into the right column!

Game 4 – Aldomiro Campion (10-5, 2.81 ERA) vs. Bobby MacDonald (9-3, 2.44 ERA)

Both these starters had missed a chunk of the season due to injury, but Aldo had still managed to face Miners three times. He went 1-1 with a 3.12 ERA. MacDonald had only faced the Raccoons once in September, getting a no-decision for six innings and two unearned runs.

The ceremonial first pitch was thrown out by right-hander He Shui, the leader in wins of the 2054 Raccoons, the most recent team of Brownshirts to win the World Series. Shui was a 28-year-old rookie in that season and won the ERA title right away in addition to Rookie of the Year honors. He went 92-72 with a 3.63 ERA, and saves 22 games in an 8-year career in the ABL, pitching for three different teams.

ATL: 2B Ehlers – RF D. Mendoza – CF Jo. Soto – LF Troxel – 1B Jer. White – C Hart – 3B B. Metz – SS X. Contreras – P MacDonald
POR: CF Schneider – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Woodley – RF Markovich – C S. Brown – LF Etienne – 3B Rivera – P Campion

Aldo pitched one inning, in which Ehlers popped out on a 3-0 pitch, Mendoza drew a four-base walk, and the Knights somehow didn’t score, then was removed from the game by Silva after admitting to having discomfort in his core, which soon turned out to be an oblique strain. Brilliant. Jimmyboy, three days removed from 34 pitches in relief, would get ready as soon as possible from there, and Moses was also sent to the pen immediately to warm up behind him. Meanwhile, the Coons took a lead, as Schneider and Yocum singled to begin the bottom 1st. Katz fanned, Woodley loaded the bases with another single, and then Markovich hit a ball through the left side for a 2-run single. Brown hit an RBI single to center, but Etienne and Rivera then ended the inning with unproductive outs, so Jimmy took the hill with a 3-0 lead.

Beau Metz, who singled off everybody, singled off Jimmy in the second, but was left on base, and so was MacDonald with his leadoff single in the third. Instead, Katz, so far pretty much underwater in the series, tripled to lead off the bottom 3rd and then was immediately brought in by Woodley with another single, 4-0, but MacDonald then struck out the next three batters.

Jimmy ended up pitching four innings in long relief. Not one of them was clean, but the fourth was by far the stickiest one. Xavier Contreras led off by doubling, and the Otter batted for MacDonald and slapped an RBI single. A walk to Ehlers brought up the tying run with nobody out, but Jimmy hunkered down from there. He got a fielder’s choice from Mendoza in a full count, getting Ehlers removed at second, then popped out Soto. Troxel ran another full count before whiffing on the ninth pitch of the at-bat, leaving runners on the corners. These four innings cost Jimmy 70 pitches, and he then handed it off to McPartland, to clear the 7-8-9 batters in the bottom 6th (we were remarkably stingy with double-switching with the short bench…), and Moses would come in after that.

Hart tripled off McPartland, who plated the runner with a wild pitch after whiffing Metz, which was depressing and reduced the score to 4-2. Moses then walked Ehlers in the seventh, and Soto hit a long fly to right with two outs – but Markovich got the catch made on the warning track to end the inning…..! Moses then retired the 4-5-6 in good order in the eighth inning.

The Raccoons didn’t tack on, so Cecere got the 2-run lead against the bottom of the order in the ninth inning. Beau Metz homered right away after singling off everybody else with two legs and a tail, and now the cushion was gone. Contreras grounded out to Katz for the first out. Alex Barnes pinch-hit for the pitcher Mello, but struck out. Ehlers was the last out of the game for Atlanta – and struck out as well!

Raccoons 4, Knights 3 – Raccoons lead series 3-1

Woodley 2-3, RBI; Wharton 4.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 4 K, W (1-0); Moses 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 1 K;

Aldo was *probably* out for the season with the oblique strain, although a full evaluation would be made after the series (IF the Coons managed to win any of the next up-to-three games).

Down to a 23-man roster now…

Game 5 – Crispino D’Urso (17-6, 2.77 ERA) vs. Brett Bebout (16-6, 2.42 ERA)

The Coons went back to their Game 1 starter, who had done well until he didn’t, while the Knights skipped ahead to Bebout after their own Game 1 letdown.

We had burned both our starters-turned-long-men in Game 4, but most of the regular relievers were decently rested for this final home game of the series, although Cecere had been out three times in four days for 54 pitches, so a bigger lead would be appreciated.

The ceremonial first pitch was delivered by Olaf Olsen, the founder of Portland’s first sperm bank for street animals, and widely suspected pervert.

ATL: 2B Ehlers – RF D. Mendoza – CF Jo. Soto – LF Troxel – 1B Jer. White – C Hart – 3B B. Metz – SS X. Contreras – P Bebout
POR: CF Schneider – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Woodley – RF Markovich – C S. Brown – LF Etienne – 3B Rivera – P D’Urso

Crispy had issued more walks than strikeouts in the series opener, but struck out Mendoza and Soto after Ehlers’ leadoff single in Game 5, and Troxel grounded out. Troxel also bungled to pick up Markovich’ singles ball in the bottom 2nd that gave the Coons an extra base and allowed Woodley to score from second base after his leadoff double, and that put the first run on the board. Brown singled softly, putting runners on the corners with nobody out, but Etienne whiffed. Rivera hit a sac fly to center, 2-0, and with two gone, Bebout gave up singles to Crispy Bear and Schneider to load the bases, but then struck out Yocum.

Crispy struck out four across the first three innings, giving up a single in each of them. No runs though, and surely better than Bebout on short rest, who loaded the bases with the 3-4-5 batters and nobody out to begin the bottom 3rd. Sam Brown spanked a sharp grounder to the right side, but Ehlers made a dive for it, knocked it down, scrambled up and threw to first – and with no aim, pulling White off the bag when he had all the time in the world with Sam Brown running…! The error was for one base and as many runs, 3-0, but Etienne singled to left for two more and Rivera hit an RBI double to knock out Bebout. Harry Facteau popped out Crispy Bear, but then plated a run with a wild pitch, and another one on Schneider’s triple to center…! Yocum hit a sac fly, and Katz hit a double before Woodley grounded out to second to end the inning.

At the end of three innings, the Raccoons held a NINE-RUN LEAD, and Crispy looked reasonably sharp. What on the baseball gods’ white Earth with red stitching could go wrong now!?

Soto reaching on a throwing error by Yocum to begin the fourth shoulda taught be some decency, and then Troxel singled. White drove in a run with a hit to center, but Crispy then *labored* out of the inning, getting to 76 pitches in four innings, 34 in this one. But the Coons reclaimed the run right away as Markovich and Brown got on base against Duarte to begin the bottom 4th, and then Rivera hit a sac fly to right, 10-1.

Crispy Bear went six innings, never had a 1-2-3 one, but struck out seven and could have looked worse. He still held on to a 9-run lead, emboldening the Raccoons to go to Rule 5 Ron for length. His first pitch smushed Joel Ehlers’ wrist. Angelo Flores replaced him… Soto hit a 2-run homer in the inning, and Troxel and White got on base before Hart hit into an inning-ending double play. Rismiller next struck out bunting after Rivera led off the bottom 7th with a double. The Coons didn’t score from there, and he struck out Metz in the eighth, but then put Xavier Contreras on and was yanked. McMahan got a double play from the usual pinch-hitter, Alex Barnes. The Coons did nothing in their half of the eighth inning, but McMahan struck out Flores and Mendoza to begin the ninth. He ran a full count to Soto, who hit a fly to left – and Etienne clawed that one to send the Raccoons to the World Series!!

Raccoons 10, Knights 3 – Raccoons win series 4-1

Schneider 2-4, BB, 3B, RBI; Katzman 3-5, 2B; Woodley 2-5, 2B; Markovich 1-2, 2 BB, RBI; S. Brown 2-4, RBI; Rivera 2-2, 2 2B, 3 RBI; D’Urso 6.0 IP, 8 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 1 BB, 7 K, W (1-0) and 1-3; McMahan 1.2 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

Huzzah!! For the first time since the 2054 championship season, the Raccoons would advance to the World Series!!

Without LeVan or Aldo (probably), but WITH Juan Licona!!

[Westheim]

2073 FLCS

The 2073 FLCS had the 109-53 Warriors enter the postseason as the best team in all of the ABL. They had done so on spectacular pitching, allowing just 544 runs across the season, with a starters’ ERA of 2.90. They had come fourth in offense, for a +236 run differential, despite hitting only 98 homers, third from the bottom in the FL. They had enough .300-ish hitters to fill a silo, but the only slugger, Jordan Lopez (.322, 25 HR, 101 RBI) entered the playoffs with a bum shoulder and would try to soldier on, officially being listed as day-to-day. Nobody else on the team had more than 13 home runs. Alex Diez (19-4, 2.22 ERA) and Harry Poteat (21-7, 2.73 ERA) fronted the rotation, and the bullpen was rock solid, with lethal weapons from either side. They looked very well rounded even though veteran starter Mike Bell and reliever Luis Olvera were going to miss at least the FLCS.

Opposite, the 97-65 Miners had the lowest win total in the postseason, but entered with the biggest margin over second place (19 games) in a lousy FL East. They had finished second in runs scored and third in runs allowed, but with only a +131 run differential. They had the best individual pitcher in the competition, maybe, as Brian Jones (21-8, 2.78 ERA) had executed 312 batters by strikeout this season (*down* from 335 the year before), but the rest of the rotation and pitching staff was decent, but not great. On offense, they had only one qualifying .300 hitter, Kris DiPrimio (.305, 15 HR, 84 RB), and only one guy with more home runs, Willie Cordova (.271, 17 HR, 92 RBI). The offense worked more on the principle of on-base, constant pressure, and tickling the other team to death with singles.

PIT @ SFW … 0-2 … (Warriors lead 1-0) … SFW Adam Quebbeman 2-3, RBI; SFW Alex Diez 8.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 7 K, W (1-0);

Diez and Matt Guadagno pitch a combined 1-hitter to knock the Miners to the ground in Game 1. Trent Taylor hits a single, and Pittsburgh brings only one guy over the minimum to the plate in the game.

PIT @ SFW … 5-3 … (series tied 1-1) … PIT Willie Romero (PH) 1-1, 2B, 2 RBI; PIT Kris DiPrimio 2-4, 2B; SFW Jon Schomer 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; SFW Devon Lewis 3-3, BB, HR, RBI;

The Warriors hit their home runs and take a 3-0 lead in the second inning, and Harry Poteat (0-0, 3.38 ERA) pitches seven scoreless before coming apart in the eighth. The Miners score all their runs in those last two innings to even the series.

SFW @ PIT … 0-7 … (Miners lead 2-1) … PIT Willie Cordova 2-4, 2B, 3 RBI; PIT Trent Taylor 3-4; PIT Tom Kies 9.0 IP, 8 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 7 K, W (1-0);

SFW @ PIT … 0-1 … (Miners lead 3-1) … SFW Jordan Lopez 2-4, 2B; PIT Roberto Pena 3-4, RBI; PIT Brian Jones 8.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 10 K, W (1-1);

SFW @ PIT … 12-5 … (Miners lead 3-2) … SFW David Jankowski 3-4, 2 2B, 4 RBI; SFW Adam Quebbeman 3-5, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; PIT Roberto Pena 3-4, 2B, 2 RBI; PIT Trent Taylor 2-3, BB, HR, RBI;

PIT @ SFW … 11-7 … (Miners win 4-2) … PIT Steve Humphries 2-5, BB, 3B, 3 RBI; PIT Willie Cordova 2-5, BB; PIT Kris DiPrimio 2-4, 2 BB, 2B, 2 RBI; PIT Trent Taylor 3-5, HR, 2B, 3 RBI; PIT Austin Gordon (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI; SFW Eddie Contreras 3-5; SFW Jordan Lopez 2-3, BB, 2B, 2 RBI; SFW David Jankowski 2-5, 3 RBI; SFW Raquel Estevens (PH) 1-1, RBI;

Both Tom Kies (1-0, 4.09 ERA) and Harry Poteat (0-0, 7.36 ERA) are battered out of the game for a handful+ runs in just a couple of innings in tit-for-tat assaults, before the Miners slowly pull away in the middle innings, while patching their own game together with multiple innings each from Dan Speake, Tony Gaytan, and Jimmy Giddings to advance to the World Series.

[Westheim]

2073 WORLD SERIES
Portland Raccoons (105-57) vs. Pittsburgh Miners (97-65)

The Miners were one of only two FL teams that the Raccoons had never met before in the World Series, the other one being the Scorpions. The Miners were also the only team in the entire league that had never WON a World Series!

To make sure this would remain one of those factoids fun for everybody outside that particular city and a 100-mile radius around it, the Raccoons had some work to do and that began with roster moves after the CLCS.

Both Phil LeVan (elbow) and Aldomiro Campion (oblique) were removed from the playoff roster. We still had five starting pitchers left, so no concerns there. In turn, we got Juan Licona back from the DL for the World Series, so that was obviously great.

Now, the rotation – the Miners leaned hard left with their lineup, so Jimmy Wharton would obviously fill the hole left by Aldo in the rotation, and we were considering whether it was worth aligning him and Bickerton in a way they could pitch four games in the series at the expense of Crispy Bear (who was not ready to pitch in the first two games in Portland anyway). Considering the left-handed tendency in the Pittsburgh lineup, the Raccoons wanted another left-handed pitcher, and despite being yoinked off the roster ahead of the CLCS, the Raccoons now added David Delgado back to it, preferring him still over Mike Pavan.

[Westheim]

2073 WORLD SERIES
Portland Raccoons (105-57) vs. Pittsburgh Miners (97-65)

For the first time in 19 years the Raccoons would host the World Series in trusty old Raccoons Ballpark, and while nominally they had won more games than the Miners, the task at paw was not an easy one, not only because the Miners right away would throw the man, the monster, Brian “Nuke” Jones on regular rest at them. The lineup perhaps lacked standout sluggers, but was dense from top to bottom (and they had a score of ex-Coons to spit in our food bowls, too!).

Left-handers, that remained our mantra. Gotta lean on our left-handers.

The Raccoons sorted Scott Bickerton to the front of the queue for pitchers in the World Series, while Nick Walla would get the second start here in Portland. After that it was likely that we’d go with Jimmy Wharton rather than Crispy Bear in Game 3.

These teams had met in the regular season, with the Raccoons winning two of the three games. Each team had scored 20 runs on the other. Perhaps my whole theory about pitching in this series was moot, as Jimmyboy Wharton had been at the front of a heavy 13-4 loss, getting stuck with nine runs, in May.

Game 1 – Scott Bickerton (17-10, 3.11 ERA) vs. Brian “Nuke” Jones (21-8, 2.78 ERA)

That 13-4 game had been started by Jones, who had struck out 312 batters this regular season, and another 19 Warriors in the FLCS. Jones was genuinely hard to beat, but he had given up 6+ runs four times this season, so sometimes the slider didn’t slide and the snapper didn’t snap, and we had two rolls of the dice for that in the series, probably, although the Miners were SO desperate for their first championship that they might pitch the 5-time defending FL strikeout king three times in this series.

I can not understate what a monster Jones was. He had 1,579 career strikeouts. He was 27 YEARS OLD.

Bickerton was not with the Raccoons at the time of that May series, and the Falcons didn’t play the Miners at all this year.

The first pitch was thrown out by Stu Loman, the first person to unicycle through all 49 contiguous states and survive the ordeal.

PIT: RF Humphries – 2B R. Pena – 1B DiPrimio – CF Cordova – SS Tr. Taylor – LF Meyer – 3B C. Castro – C W. Romero – P B. Jones
POR: CF Schneider – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – RF Licona – 1B Woodley – C S. Brown – LF Etienne – 3B Rivera – P Bickerton

The former Critters Steve Humphries and Roberto Pena were rounded up with strikeouts by Bickers to begin the game, but he walked Kris DiPrimio before getting a groundout from Willie Cordova. In the second, Trent Taylor, Mike Meyer, and Carlos Castro, and all the other alliterations, went down on groundouts. The Raccoons first got on base with Licona returning with a leadoff walk in the bottom 2nd, although Woodley then became the first punchout for “Nuke” Jones. Sam Brown singled to right, Licona dashed to third base, and we had runners on the corners for – well, how the **** did we get to the point where Jaylen Etienne (0 career homers) started a World Series game in the field!!?? He struck out, unsurprisingly, and Ronaldo Rivera popped out, ending the inning.

Bickers worked around a leadoff walk to Willie Romero in the third inning, then hit a leadoff single himself in the bottom of the inning. Schneider walked and was forced out by Yocum grounding one to the shortstop Taylor, and with runners on the corners *again*, Katz popped out behind home plate for the second out. Jones got Licona to 1-2, but no further. Licona caught up with the 1-2 pitch, and THUNDERED a 3-run home run to right-center!!! HUZZAH!!!

Two things from there; it started to rain, and Bickerton gave up a leadoff single to DiPrimio, a walk to Taylor, and singles to Meyer and Castro for two runs right away in the fourth inning before Romero popped out and Jones fanned. That entirely wasn’t how you’d want to go about a 3-0 lead with Jones on the mound for the opposition, and it only got worse. The Miners AGAIN had the leadoff man Humphries on base with a single in the fifth, and this time Bickers struck out Pena, flew out DiPrimio, but then gave up a 2-piece to Cordova with two outs, and the Miners took a 4-3 lead…

But you hadn’t seen nothing yet, because Bickerton went back out for the sixth, AGAIN put the ******* leadoff man on base, as he walked Meyer, and then gave up two singles, a run, and then, when faced with Jones, a 3-run homer to break the game wide open, 8-3.

The air was a bit out of the game from here, although Jack Moses at least got a couple of outs on the board without giving up more crooked numbers. Moses also hit a single in the bottom 7th, together with Schneider, who also got back on base, but Yocum lined out to short and Katz grounded out to short to let that chance pass. Jones was done after seven innings, having struck out only five Coons, but done plenty of damage otherwise. Hector Gomez batted for him and cranked a pinch-hit home run off Moses in the eighth. Woodley singled and was doubled up by Brown in the bottom 8th, and after a Woodley error put the leadoff man on base in the ninth inning, Delgado replaced Moses to finish out the game. Delgado SUCKED beyond words, got beaten up and around for another three runs, but that was like his ******* problem, as we preferred to keep the arms together for Game 2.

Miners 12, Raccoons 3 – Miners lead series 1-0

Schneider 2-4, BB, 2B; McFarland (PH) 1-1;

Game 2 – Nick Walla (12-8, 3.16 ERA) vs. Nate Freeman (16-9, 3.22 ERA)

All my schemes so far had been rather harebrained, and now we’d send in Walla for Game 2. He had given up five runs in a no-decision in May, but of course everything was much better aligned for him now. Surely. Hopefully. We also went back and put Markovich in leftfield for Game 2 against the right-handed Nate Freeman.

Freeman had actually pitched twice against the Critters this year, before being traded to the Miners from New York. He had gone 1-1 with a 4.80 ERA.

The ceremonial first pitch was thrown out by Trent Brassfield, who caught the final out of the 2054 World Series, a fly ball by the Warriors’ Jason Schaack, to seal a Raccoons title in five games. Hey, we’re still in the running for that!

PIT: 3B C. Castro – RF Humphries – CF Cordova – 1B DiPrimio – LF Meyer – 2B R. Pena – SS Tr. Taylor – C G. Rivas – P N. Freeman
POR: CF Schneider – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – RF Licona – 1B Woodley – LF Markovich – C S. Brown – 3B Rivera – P Walla

Castro singled to start Game 2, but Walla struck out two of the next three to keep him decent and from scoring. The Raccoons first reached base with back-to-back singles by Woodley and Markovich, who went to the corners with one out in the bottom 2nd, but Sam Brown hit the ball back to the pitcher, and Freeman had no troubles getting a 1-6-3 double play out of that one.

Gabe Rivas’ leadoff single and an error by Brown on Freeman’s bunt then put a pair on base to begin the third inning. Walla struck out Castro, but Humph hit a fly to deep left. Markovich bounced off the wall to catch that, but kept all his limbs intact, at least. Rivas made for third base on the play, but Markovich also caught Willie Cordova’s easier fly to left to keep them on the corners.

Walla hit a single in the bottom 3rd, but nobody cared, and then returned with a leadoff walk (…) to DiPrimio and a Pena single with one out. Taylor popped out to Licona in shallow right, but Rivas singled well past Yocum to drive in DiPrimio from second for the first run of the game. Walla had to get the last out from Freeman, and then issued ANOTHER leadoff walk to Castro in the fifth. He was forced out by Humph, who resisted pickoff attempts, and then the Miners filled the bases with an infield single by Cordova, and then a bloop single by DiPrimio, and perhaps that was the point at which I knew that we weren’t gonna hoist the trophy at the end of the series. The Coons snapped and sent Rios in to replace Walla after his 4.1 muddy innings, but Rios gave up a 2-run single to the previously .120 hitting Mike Meyer, and only then got two outs from Pena and Taylor. The Coons were down 3-0 in the middle of the fifth inning, and looked already pretty much cooked.

Rios batted for himself so he could remove the 8-9-1 batters in the sixth, which he very much didn’t. He got Rivas, then walked Freeman (!!), allowed a single to Castro, walked Humph, and then walked in a run against Cordova. McPartland replaced him and got a double play grounder from DiPrimio to end the inning in the 4-0 game. Yocum also hit into a double play after Schneider walked to begin the bottom 6th, which was a great way to ensure that it didn’t get any closer than 4-0 any time soon. Freeman then walked Katz as well, and then ran into a 2-run homer by Licona, 4-2!

After Woodley hit another single, and Markovich grounded out, McPartland collected three more outs. Freeman returned for the bottom 7th, but was knocked out on two pitches, which Brown and Rivera took for a single and double, respectively, and parked the tying runs in scoring position with nobody out. The Miners replaced Freeman with right-hander Jorge Sanchez, who popped out the pinch-hitting Ramon Mata, conceded a run on Schneider’s groundout, and then also popped out Yocum to leave the tying run on third base.

McMahan for the Coons, and Javier Arocho and Alex Nunez for the Miners allowed no runners in the eighth inning. We actually went to Cecere for the ninth, and he gave up a leadoff single to Humph, but then got three outs and kept the runner on base.

Bottom 9th, and another ex-Coon, Pedro Valentin, who had left Portland last summer with a 6.09 ERA and had since pitched to a 1.90 ERA for the Rebs and Miners, and who could just burn in ******* hell for all I cared. He struck out Markovich and popped out Brown before we tried another lefty bat against him, but Etienne just kept striking out, and the Coons sat at the bottom of an 0-2 soup.

Miners 4, Raccoons 3 – Miners lead series 2-0

Woodley 2-3, BB;

…

[Westheim]

2073 WORLD SERIES
Portland Raccoons (105-57) @ Pittsburgh Miners (97-65)

The Raccoons bade their ballpark farewell, and how things were going, for the season. Three games (maybe) in Pittsburgh were up next, and the Raccoons were still hellbent on sending out Jimmy Wharton for Game 3.

What could possibly even go wrong anymore from here?

Game 3 – Jimmy Wharton (14-9, 3.52 ERA) vs. Tom Kies (13-6, 3.68 ERA)

For the first time this postseason, we’d see a left-handed starter. Not that it changed MUCH about our lineup.

Jimmy had of course been run for nine runs in his start against the Miners in May, so the tactic by now was to make them feel safe, and then trip them up by sending out Rule 5 Ron in the second inning or something, I don’t know. Kies hadn’t faced the Critters in May.

POR: CF Schneider – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – RF Licona – LF Markovich – 1B Woodley – C Contreras – 3B Rivera – P Wharton
PIT: RF Humphries – 2B R. Pena – 1B DiPrimio – CF Cordova – SS Tr. Taylor – LF M. Meyer – 3B C. Castro – C W. Romero – P Kies

Kies walked three Critters in the first inning, and somehow we even scored with the help of a former friend even after Yocum made it two outs with a 6-4-3 grounder to erase Schneider’s leadoff walk. Katz walked, and Licona doubled to right, where Humph then threw badly to home plate, allowing Katz to score. Another walk to Markovich and a Woodley RBI single made it 2-0 before Contreras struck out. The Miners right away got leadoff knocks from Humph and Pena, though, and scored a run on Cordova’s sac fly in the bottom of the inning, so the Jimmy Wharton strategy DEFINITELY wasn’t working.

The Miners also had the first two batters on base in the second inning, and it was getting a bit ridiculous at this point. Meyer singled, Castro walked, and then Willie Romero made it three with a game-tying RBI single. Kies bunted, Humph lined out, and Jimmy couldn’t ******* field Pena’s grounder, which became an RBI single, and DiPrimio hit another RBI single after that. Cordova grounded out, but the Miners had turned the 2-0 deficit into a 4-2 lead in just two innings.

Licona’s daily homer made it 4-3 in the third inning before Wharton offered a leadoff walk to Taylor in the bottom of the inning. Meyer fanned and Castro hit into a double play, but that didn’t stop me from frothing from the mouth.

Pena doubled home Kies, who had singled (…) in the bottom 4th, 5-3, and that was the end for Wharton. Even Rule 5 Ron could then get four outs without tripping over his own ******* tail, but thankfully we wouldn’t get to a Game 7 anyway like this.

Neither team reached base in the sixth, as Delgado retired the bottom of the order, and Rivera drew a walk against Jorge Sanchez in the seventh, but nothing came of that as the Raccoons continued to trail by two runs. Chad Brown then doubled that with another useless outing in the bottom 7th, giving up straight hits to Pena, DiPrimio (double), and Cordova (RBI single), with a sac fly by Trent Taylor on top, before getting yanked. Rios came in, completely unhinged walked Meyer, and then somehow coaxed Castro into thinking there was a superior strategy to just standing there and taking another walk. He grounded out to second to end the inning.

Licona hit a 2-out single in the eighth that was only for the statistics, while in the ninth Javier Arocho got the 4-run lead, but allowed singles to Woodley and Rivera to bring in Valentin. Mata pinch-hit for Rios and struck out on a 3-2 pitch that hit home plate, and Schneider sent Humph all the way to the wall with a fly ball, but the catch was made, and the Raccoons were done.

Miners 7, Raccoons 3 – Miners lead series 3-0

Licona 3-4, HR, RBI; Woodley 2-4, RBI; Rivera 2-3, BB;

(buries face in paws)

(sobs)

Game 4 – Crispino D’Urso (17-6, 2.77 ERA) vs. Brian “Nuke” Jones (21-8, 2.78 ERA)

Turns out we *would* see the “Nuke” only twice in this series, but not in the way we had imagined. The Miners were lusting for that first championship, and had no time to waste. The Raccoons still didn’t know what was hitting them. We went back to our Game 2 lineup, not that that had given us any luck.

POR: CF Schneider – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – RF Licona – 1B Woodley – LF Markovich – C S. Brown – 3B Rivera – P D’Urso
PIT: 3B C. Castro – RF Humphries – CF Cordova – 1B DiPrimio – LF Meyer – 2B R. Pena – SS Tr. Taylor – C G. Rivas – P B. Jones

Humph hit a double in the first inning, but otherwise Crispy looked good enough in the early going, while Jones retired the first six Critters he faced, four by strikeout, before walking Sam Brown to begin the third inning. A wild pitch advanced the runner, but Rivera struck out, and Crispy grounded out meekly. Schneider got hold of a fastball, though, and put it into the seats for a home run and a 2-0 lead. Yocum and Katz, both batting in the .100s at this point for the playoffs, then hit a pair of singles, but Jones Nuked Licona, and that ended the inning.

The ******* ******** with putting on all the leadoff batters started in the third inning with a Rivas single, although he was left on base. In the fourth, Crispy Bear walked Cordova and gave up a single to DiPrimio to make it TWO on base to start the inning. Meyer grounded out, but Pena got through the right side for an RBI single, 2-1. Taylor struck out and Rivas popped out to end the inning and leave runners on the corners.

Through four innings, Crispy Bear had two strikeouts and Jones had NINE. Crispy became #10 to begin the fifth inning, but Schneider and Yocum then hit singles to get to the corners. Katz popped out, and Licona hit a fly to deep right. He missed his daily World Series homer, but the ball hit off the bottom of the wall for an RBI double, 3-1. 3-1 was also the count on which Woodley grounded out to short to end the inning.

The “Nuke” didn’t Jones another player until he came up to Crispy again, then ending the top of the sixth, while Crispy allowed another ******* leadoff single to DiPrimio in the bottom 6th. Pena also singled, but Katz got an inning-ending double play grounder from Trent Taylor to get him out of the inning.

Schneider (walk) and Katz (1-out single) were on the corners in the seventh inning, but Licona struck out against Jones, the 12th and final K for Jones in the game as he was then replaced with Alex Nunez for Woodley. The southpaw got the groundout and stranded the inherited runners. Crispy also left after 6.2 innings, but not on a high note. Instead a leadoff single (AAARGGHH!!!!) by Rivas and Castro’s 1-out double had shortened the score to 3-2. Humph’s groundout moved the tying run to third base, and McMahan was sent in for Cordova. The Miners sent Willie Romero to pinch-hit, and he hit a fly to right-center that was gonna dink in until Licona came flying out of nowhere and made a diving catch!!!

McMahan struck out in the top 8th so he could continue to pitch, with neither Rios nor Delgado being of any use to man nor beast, but gave up a leadoff single (visible blood vessels at the temples) to DiPrimio before getting stingy outs from Meyer and Norm Chapman. Wanting no part of the right-handed hitting Taylor, the Coons then intentionally walked him with first base open; the Miners had already burned their second catcher, and couldn’t bat for the left-handed Rivas anymore! Rivas flew out to left, and that ended the inning.

The Coons gained insurance in the ninth inning as Arocho put Schneider on base to begin the inning. He stole second, scored on Katz’ double, and a wild pitch, and – after Licona was walked intentionally – sac fly by Woodley got another run home.

So now we got to watch Cecere put not one but TWO ******* LEADOFF BATTERS ON BASE. Gomez singled, Castro walked, and then he started to strike out people. First Humph, then Ron Wilmes. DiPrimio hit the first pitch he got up the middle, but Katz was there and got the force at second base to keep the Raccoons theoretically involved in this championship.

Raccoons 5, Miners 2 – Miners lead series 3-1

Schneider 2-3, 2 BB, HR, 2 RBI; Yocum 2-5; Katzman 3-5, 2B, RBI; S. Brown 2-3, BB, 2B; D’Urso 6.2 IP, 8 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 3 K, W (2-0);

Game 5 – Scott Bickerton (17-10, 3.11 ERA) vs. Nate Freeman (16-9, 3.22 ERA)

Our pitching plans beyond Game 5 were in thorough disarray at this point, but there was no alternative to Bickers anyway in Game 5.

POR: CF Schneider – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – RF Licona – 1B Woodley – LF Markovich – C S. Brown – 3B Rivera – P Bickerton
PIT: RF Humphries – 2B R. Pena – 1B DiPrimio – CF Cordova – SS Tr. Taylor – LF Meyer – 3B C. Castro – C W. Romero – P N. Freeman

Game 5 started peculiar with Schneider reaching on an uncaught third strike, but the Coons never got the free runner off first base in the inning. The Miners got Pena on with a single in the bottom 1st, but he got doubled up, 3-U style, on DiPrimio’s liner to Woodley.

Bickerton got only one more out. The Miners began the bottom 2nd with a Cordova double, then got two singles from Taylor and Meyer to drive in a run. Bickerton balked in another after Castro grounded out. Romero singled home a run, 3-0, and a FOUR-PITCH WALK to THE ******* OPPOSING PITCHER made the kettle boil over. Moses was inserted, allowed a single to Humphries (noisy double-facepaw with groan!!), but then had both Pena and DiPrimio pop out to end the inning.

Rivera doubled and Schneider socked a 2-run homer in the third to get the score narrowed down to 3-2. Meyer tripled with two outs in the inning and Moses walked Castro before Romero flew out to Markovich… Moses continued to wobble around until he wore out his welcome, too, in the bottom of the fifth inning, giving up a leadoff double to DiPrimio, and then THREE WALKS to Cordova (who was caught stealing), Taylor and Meyer. The only card the Raccoons could play with Castro at the plate was McMahan. Under the watch of the left-hander, FIVE RUNS would score, and he didn’t get out of the inning. Castro singled. Romero singled. Freeman plated a run with a groundout. Humph singled. Pena singled. Each drove in a run. When Rule 5 Ron replaced him just to get out of the ******* inning, he plated Humph from third base with a wild pitch on his very first pitch.

I took the cue, and my hat, and left the suckers to their own devices. I left the ballpark, crossed the street, and entered the Irish pub right across from the house of sadness. Of course, they had the ******* game on TV there, too, but I could at least get proper beer to drink myself senseless and maybe even into a coma. I arrived just in time to see Katz hit a 2-run homer in the sixth that he should have saved for next season, because even with Yocum on base and with Rule 5 Ron having not ****** any additional runs onto the board, it was still a 9-4 blowout. Even Licona’s almost-daily homer only made it 9-5. And chased Freeman.

The Miners boldly brought on Tetsu Kurihara, perhaps one of the worst pitchers still somehow employed. He struck out four furred dimwits in two innings. Romero and Gomez hit singles against McPartland in the bottom 7th, but the Miners missed the final blow and let the Coons squirrel off again with their 4-run deficit. Katz singled off Alex Nunez in the eighth, but got no help from anybody else, and so that inning led nowhere.

Bottom 8th, Rios came in because they still had left-handed bats. He faced four batters, gave up four hits, a 3-run homer to Meyer included, and then departed again. On my fifth ale, I was past caring, even when Katz threw a ball away to plate another unearned run behind Chad Brown. What did it matter anymore?

Miners 13, Raccoons 5 – Miners win series 4-1

Licona 2-4, HR, RBI; Etienne (PH) 1-1;

(barfs into a bucket while crying and ordering another ale)

+++

2073 WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS
Pittsburgh Miners
(1st title)

[DD Martin]

Really good season, bummer it didn’t get the Raccoons their 9th ring. Miner just got hot at the right time and the injury bug was really biting the last month of the season.

[Westheim]

(wakes up in darkness) … (blinks)

I feel the comfort of discarded food and garbage bags underneath my furry tush. (tries to stretch, but paws hit something)

(feels around) … M-hm. M-hm. (nods to himself) … (expertly opens the lid of the garbage can from the inside and climbs out)

…

(sits on top of the garbage can in an unknown alleyway, slightly swaying in a cool breeze, and starts to pick bits of potato peels out of his fur)

The last thing I remember – what is it… oh yes. Tetsu ******* Kurihara shutting the door on the Raccoons. (sways in the breeze) … I can’t tell you whether that was ten hours or ten years ago. (looks around) Or where I am. (looks around and spots a stack of newspapers on the ground next to the garbage can.

(squints hard)

The ‘Billings Trombone-Gazette’?? … (sways) … probably not a worse piece of slander than the Agitator. (squints harder) … those are from the week of the World Series, so maybe it’s closer to ten hours after the Coons lost the Series, rather than ten years.

(picks another something out of his fur, sniffs at it, sniffs again, then sticks it in his snout)

That’s still good. Oh well. (stretches right hindpaw) I guess, there’s still work to do in Portland.

(as he jumps off the garbage can and has all four paws in mid-air, the frame freezes, and a drum-heavy 1980s action TV series theme starts clanging, and in big bold yellow letters, the script ‘WESTFIELD, GM’ appears on screen)

+++

After 21 hours on the bus from Billings to Portland I arrived back at Raccoons Ballpark, five days after the sad-sack end of the World Series and after most players and personnel had scattered. The thing that was there was the envelope with Adam Valdes’ new budget for 2074.

The Raccoons had won a grand total of 110 games in 2073 on a barely top-10 budget of $68M, and of course 110 wins hadn’t been enough in the end. Valdes ******* FINALLY found his wallet and opened it up reasonably wide and increased the budget to $75M, which still only put the Raccoons in eighth place among all teams, but separated from the sticky midfield now, and while still remote from the top five (and one note on that in a second), there was more than just a little wiggle room for the first time in several years.

The purse still paled of course to the Knights, who aimed not just the moon, but several planets over with the their new $104M budget…!

Top 5: Knights ($104M), Warriors ($98M), Crusaders ($97M), Miners ($91M), Titans ($87M)
Bottom 5: Scorpions ($57M), Loggers ($57M), Blue Sox ($51M), Condors ($46M), Falcons ($45.5M)

The remaining CL North teams could be found in 16th (IND, $62M) and 19th (VAN, $58M).

The average budget this year went up a roughly $1.1M to $70.15M. The median budget went up $250k to $66.75M.

+++

Some things were a-changing in Portland, and some would stay the same. Both Adam Yocum and Ricky McMahan had player options for the 2074 season, smelled the chance of a ring, and executed them, for $8.1M and $1.6M respectively, virtually assuring that Yocum even with budget room would stay the biggest earner on the roster, which Anthony Schneider (who had a raise to $6.1M kick in) most likely coming up in second place.

Changing was the head scout, as Oscar Semchez elected retirement, so a replacement had to be found there.

There would also be changes about some of the 35 players hanging around on the extended roster as we entered the offseason. First of all, eight of those were coming up for salary arbitration and three more were free agents.

Starting with the free agents, the only one eligible for compensation (type B) was Jonathan Contreras, who had somehow been out-hit by Sam Brown over the course of the season, so we’d gladly cash the extra draft pick there and find a defensive catcher to pair with the oddly high-OBP (.395) Brown. Then there was Gabriel Rios, and there was by now enough animosity and frustration (not only from Game 5) and broken promises there that it was best to part ways.

The third free agent case was Phil LeVan, and he was the one with the broken elbow (in addition to Jack Hamel having the shredded knee), so there were a couple of half-in, half-out outfielders from last season that were in serious medical trouble and still perhaps wise to keep around. LeVan was 32 and whether he’d be extended a contract offer would largely come down to his willingness to sign a 1-year deal, perhaps with options.

We also had eight arbitration cases, three of them position players. One was the already mentioned Sam Brown, who had put up an impressive OPS mostly on walking a lot and slapping singles. He was a keeper for sure, just like Josh Woodley, former Rule 5 pick, who was not giving us any reason to complain at first base. The third position player on the list was Ricky Jurado, and I crossed out his name in red faster than Cristiano Carmona could load up on breath to try and explain how good his swing paths were, or how he has mastered the art of diamond sudoku, or some other **** that was not reflected in his .169/.213/.247 slash line. He hit .276 with 11 homers in AAA, but I wasn’t gonna pay up to $2M to find out whether he could do that in the big leagues *this time* around.

Three of the six starting pitchers we had ended the season with were up for arbitration, including both starters shipped in from the Falcons independently of each other during the season, Bickerton and Moses, as well as injury-happy Aldo. They’d all stay of course, but the question was what to do with six starting pitchers when you had Jalen McCorkle waiting to come up at some point next year (and hopefully not doing a Centeno in the meantime). McCorkle would have come up (most likely) *this* summer if not for the elbow injury.

And then there were two highly erratic and routinely annoying relievers in the mix, Cam Jackson and “Rule 5 Ron” Rismiller. I probably enjoyed spitting “Rule 5 Ron” too much to non-tender him, but I was actually considering it for Jackson, who had gotten BOMBED seven times last year, and was walking too many people.

Now that I checked, Rule 5 Ron’s BB/9 was just as bad.

Okay, maybe there are savings to be made besides Jurado’s arbitration estimate here…

[Westheim]

Unbeknownst to management at the time, Josh Woodley was DESPERATE to sign a long-term extension and was lurking around the ballpark just waiting for an opportunity to plead his case for job security. Given that he had just posted two seasons of 3.8 and 3.4 WAR, had decent defense, and had won CLCS MVP honors just mere weeks ago, he was selling his fur well under value. The Raccoons were able to sign him up for SEVEN years and just $15.6M for a year buying out his arbitration years, four years of free agency, but two of those would be cheap team options. The salary in those last four seasons would only go up to $2.7M, which was shockingly cheap.

But I’d be a bad GM if I kept my players from making stupid financial decisions to tie themselves up for paupers’ money until they’re 32, so I was all too happy and eager to sign that deal that guaranteed him only $11.3M over five years.

Things went on from there by settling on contract extensions with all three starting pitchers in the arbitration queue. Aldo and Moses signed 1-year deals for $1.8M and $950k, respectively, but the Raccoons and Scott Bickerton agreed on a 6-year, $21.1M contract extension that covered two years of team control and four years of free agency, the last year being a team option. Another team-friendly, long-term extension! Now they just all had to remain healthy and effective…..

And it’s all fine and dandy to pile up starting pitchers first and then decide what to do with them later.

Also dealt with later were one-year extensions with Sam Brown ($660k) and Rule 5 Ron ($575k). Eventually we also got Cam Jackson signed for $690k.

Ricky Jurado did not get an offer, and Jonathan Contreras declined the arbitration offer and filed for free agency, leaving the Raccoons with the hope for a supplemental round pick as compensation. Phil LeVan and Gabriel Rios also became free agents, and so did a couple of AAA players including Antonio Pacheco and Dave Falquez.

With that, we’d reach the juicy part of the offseason, including several intriguing international free agents that had washed ashore, including young Cuban SP Dante Herrera, Japanese left-hander Kazuo Sonoda, Cuban right-hander Marco Carrillo, and Japanese slugger Tatsukichi “Smooth” Yonemura; the “Smooth” was apparently a jeer and short for “Smooth Brain” for the 27-year-old’s abject lack of any shred of intellect – the Japanese media was not playing around, but then again by age 25 he had reportedly already burned his house down cookie rice, twice – but he could sure hammer the baseball far and wide. He was the most expensive of the bunch.

The Raccoons’ finances were not limitless, but about $7M were available, however, the real construction sites were elsewhere, as we needed a catcher to pair with Sam Brown, third base had been rather desolately maintained by Ronaldo Rivera, and at least a thought should be expended on a veteran left-handed reliever.

+++

October 25 – The Pacifics send SP Jonathan Martello (13-10, 3.78 ERA), who missed most of the last two seasons with injuries, to the Wolves for two prospects.
November 3 – A couple of days after he is named the FL Rookie of the Year, the Cyclones swap OF Chris Torino (.286, 18 HR, 72 RBI) to the Rebels for 2B Matthew Selep (.293, 44 HR, 398 RBI) and catcher #90 prospect, Bobby Bryant.
November 13 – The Crusaders send UT Luke McGrew (.271, 18 HR, 174 RBI) to the Indians for RF/LF Brian Layell (.272, 14 HR, 73 RBI).

+++

2073 ABL AWARDS

Players of the Year: SFW OF Jordan Lopez (.322, 25 HR, 101 RBI) and POR INF John Katzman (.322, 25 HR, 100 RBI)
Pitchers of the Year: SFW SP Alex Diez (19-4, 2.22 ERA) and POR SP Crispino D’Urso (17-6, 2.77 ERA)
Rookies of the Year: CIN OF Chris Torino (.286, 18 HR, 72 RBI) and BOS RF/LF Jonathan Snyder (.270, 22 HR, 88 RBI)
Relievers of the Year: PIT CL Pedro Valentin (3-2, 1.94 ERA, 43 SV) and POR CL Orazio Cecere (1-1, 1.21 ERA, 56 SV)
Platinum Sticks (FL): P SAC Gustavo Vega – C SAL Danny Rivera – 1B SAL Jeremy McDermott – 2B DEN Chris McNulty – 3B PIT Carlos Castro – SS PIT Trent Taylor – LF SFW Jordan Lopez – CF LAP Mike Hulett – RF CIN Melvin Avila
Platinum Sticks (CL): P NYC Jarod Nesbit – C LVA Chris Haynes – 1B MIL Cesar Ramirez – 2B LVA Jimmy Williams – 3B LVA Matt Rodewald – SS POR John Katzman – LF NYC Eddie Marcotte – CF ATL Jorge Soto – RF MIL Carlos Dominguez
Gold Gloves (FL): P TOP Dan Jennings – C WAS Chris Willhite – 1B TOP Tom Ferrari – 2B DEN Chris McNulty – 3B SAL Ray Olin – SS SAL Tyrese Armstrong – LF CIN Chris Torino – CF PIT Willie Cordova – RF RIC Travis Bickerton
Gold Gloves (CL): P CHA Randy Rautenstrauch – C TIJ Robert Alvarez – 1B NYC Raul Ledesma – 2B SFB Mario Flores – 3B ATL Beau Metz – SS NYC Tomas Guangorena – LF TIJ Eddie Campos – CF BOS Keigo Mochizuki – RF ATL David Mendoza

Kaaaatz!!

The last time a Raccoon won the Player of the Year award in the Continental League, John Katzman’s parents hadn’t even met yet. That would have been Manny Fernandez in 2036…! Only two other Critters had won the award before that, Tetsu Osanai, twice in 1986 and 1988, and David Brewer in 1995.

The Pitcher of the Year award had been visited more regularly by Critters, with the most recent winners being Seisaku Taki in 2052, He Shui in 2054, and Kennedy Adkins in 2055, just before Ben Seiter won a couple for the Crusaders, and then Jason Brenize started his rein of terror on the league and award.

For Cecere it was his third straight Reliever of the Year award, but the first as a Critter. He had won the pot with the Falcons in 2071-72. Which begs the question how the Falcons were going absolutely nowhere but the Coons dashed to 105 regular season wins with Cecere, and (for parts of the year) Bickerton and Moses. The most recent Raccoon to win this award had been Matt Walters, taking it home three times in 2055, 2057, and 2059, the first of these in conjunction with the Rookie of the Year award (as Taki and Shui had done in their Pitcher of the Year campaigns, although they had been veterans of the Japanese and Taiwanese league, respectively).

The only one of the four major awards we didn’t take this year was the Rookie crown, but Crispy had won that last year. The last CL player to follow up the ROTY title with the Player or Pitcher of the Year award in the following season was – NOT Jerry Outram, the Elks’ specter of terror from the 2030s and 2040s, who had one season in between his ROTY title and the first of his five POTY awards; but Kevin McGrath (who?), who did it on different teams, taking ROTY honors with the Falcons in 2025, and then ending up winning the POTY title after being traded to the Condors. That 2026 season was the only time McGrath led the league in homers, RBI, slugging, and OPS, and the first of seven times he led it in strikeouts, which tells you how the rest of his career went and why he’s not in the Hall of Fame.

[Westheim]

The Raccoons entered the races for Tatsukichi Yonemura, the Brick from Yokohama, as the offseason proper began to ramp up, even though there were other construction sites on the roster, primarily catcher and third base.

This would for sure add another giant contract to the roster, and at the same time we nosed around the league a bit to see whether the odd other giant contract on the roster could be traded for an All Star catcher or something, but it was not the best time to try and swing large sums of commitments around in mid-November when everybody piled onto the newly minted free agents. I can’t go into too much details because the Agitator has its jagged ears everywhere, but Adam Yocum had the biggest contract on the team (2074 would be the final season of it), but his production was tailing off a bit. He had put up 5.1 WAR in his first season in Portland, and it had gone down every year since, reaching 2.8 in ’73. Also, middle infielders in their mid-30s, yada yada yada.

Also, what’s the plan with Katz, given that he’d hit 30 just after next year’s World Series (and hopefully no longer unringed). Did a move to third base make sense, or did we want to try and work it out with Ronaldo Rivera there? Katz’s range wasn’t the greatest, but the same was true for his arm – maybe you actually wanted to rotate him the other direction, towards second base…? His career zone ratings clearly advertised putting him at second (but that wouldn’t be in the cards for this year with Yocum there (COUGH)), as he had +16.1 ZR in 1,685 innings at second, +16.4 ZR in a whopping 7,156 innings at short, and only +1.4 ZR in 1,165 innings at third base. This season, his ZR at third had been negative at -1.4 for just under 300 innings, and +0.8 in 987 innings at short. He had not appeared at second base for the Coons since 2070, but had played there all the time with the Wolves and had won his first Platinum Stick at second base in 2069.

Assuming the Raccoons got the Yokohama Brick, where would he even bat. With the prodigious power, the right-hander would fit very well between the left-handed sticks of Licona and Woodley, so he’d probably be batting fifth, with Schneider and Yocum (cough!) still on top of the lineup, and then Katz in the #3 slot (because which insane individual would move their CL Player of the Year from the #3 slot?). That left the catcher (currently Sam Brown by default) and third baseman (probably Ronaldo Rivera by default) to fill out the lineup – and if we signed Yonemura, there wouldn’t be too much money left over for other improvements.

Don’t forget though that we have six starting pitchers on staff, not counting Jalen McCorkle. Of the pitchers… the most expensive was actually 3-times-running CL Reliever of the Year Orazio Cecere, who made $5.2M in 2074 and who had a player option for ’75, which was nice for him I guess, and only then the starters would crop up with Walla making $3.2M, Bickerton and Wharton $2.1M each (both getting increases later on), and Aldo $1.8M in a contract year. Moses was at $950k and under team control, and Crispy made the minimum, because life was just unfair.

So it wasn’t easy at all to free up budget space by trading a starting pitcher, but you should get a catcher for any of them just fine.

If you traded Yocum, and rotated Katz to second, you then needed to find a #2 hitter. Woodley was an option with a career .292/.379/.439 slash, but had no speed to offer. McFarland was a weird one, slipping onto the roster mid-2071 and never going away and playing almost exclusively off the bench while batting .292/.373/.390 last year. He was much more from Yocum’s profile in terms of the lack of power (one career home run), but had the promise of being a very good base stealer if you just let him play regularly. I also regularly forgot his first name, much like with Andy Yocum.

McFarland would be a very good defensive shortstop, but whether he’d hold up in the #2 hole was a different question, as he was only a .260/.340/.343 hitter for his career. Then there was the #130 prospect, Ismael Tenorio, who had reached AAA this year, but had only hit .236 in 85 games, and who was not seriously in the running so far. Tenorio would turn 23 in February, so there was still time.

+++

November 18 – The Stars acquire LF/RF Luis Vazquez (.262, 6 HR, 55 RBI) from the Rebels for 3B Justin Moore (.230, 14 HR, 80 RBI) and #129 prospect Jon Hinshaw.
November 20 – The Raccoons trade for the Blue Sox’ C Pat Cohen (.257, 57 HR, 314 RBI), parting with SP Steve George (5-12, 5.08 ERA).
November 20 – The Rebs acquire 1B Brian Ventimiglia (.308, 1 HR, 78 RBI) from the Scorpions, who receive infielder John Love (.240, 8 HR, 49 RBI).
November 22 – 34-year-old star shortstop Trent Taylor (.258, 118 HR, 746 RBI) signs a 3-year, $11.52M deal with the Knights after just having won the World Series with the Miners.
November 22 – The Buffaloes sign ex-POR C Jonathan Contreras (.281, 95 HR, 465 RBI) to a $2M contract for 2074. The Raccoons receive a supplemental round draft pick for compensation.
November 26 – The Crusaders sign ex-ATL SP Andy Canada (137-89, 3.54 ERA) to a 2-year, $13.4M contract.
November 27 – New York also snaps up 4-time CL Player of the Year 1B/LF/RF Cesar Ramirez (.332, 206 HR, 998 RBI) from the disintegrating Loggers team on a 2-year, $17.2M deal.
November 27 – The Loggers acquire SP T.J. Herbert (42-46, 3.62 ERA) from the Buffaloes, along with $1.1M in cash, for a prospect.
November 28 – Former New York outfielder Jose Banuelos (.273, 91 HR, 360 RBI) agrees to a 3-year, $4.46M contract offer from the Scorpions.
November 29 – The Loggers sign ex-OCT 1B Ian Stone (.292, 254 HR, 969 RBI) to a 3-year, $12.12M contract. The soon-to-be 37-year-old Stone had spent his entire career in the Thunder system up to this point.
November 29 – The Raccoons sign 24-year-old Cuban SP Dante Herrera to a minor league deal.
November 30 – Atlanta draws in former Crusaders SP Jarod Nesbit (83-79, 3.89 ERA) with an offer of $36.1M over six years. This returns the #19 pick in the 2074 draft that the Crusaders had forfeited to the Knights four days earlier to the Crusaders again.
November 30 – The Stars land ex-RIC 1B David Cline (.272, 60 HR, 448 RBI) on a 5-year, $28.94M contract.
December 1 – Rule 5 Draft: 12 players are selected from outside their previous team’s 40-man rosters. The Raccoons are not affected.
December 1 – The Buffaloes get the deal done with ex-SAC LF Ian Streng (.273, 132 HR, 616 RBI), giving the 33-year-old a 2-year, $8.08M contract.

+++

Pat Cohen is an excellent defensive catcher that hasn’t always hit a lot and put up a career-high .765 OPS with the Sox in 2073, but he’s also a nearly-even switch-hitter that has an advantage against left-handed pitchers, meshing very well with left-handed hitting Sam Brown. He also made only $1.7M each for another three years, and Steve George had to get outta town anyway. The Blue Sox think they can fix him. Bless their little hearts.

The Crusaders were in the funny situation now where they had forfeited their second round pick, but not their unprotected first round pick.

The Titans’ outfielder Manuel Garcia was also briefly a free agent before the Titans resigned him for six years and some $36M, which probably meant another 200 homers off the Raccoons for the rest of the decade.

Meanwhile, the Capitals tossed $1.64M down the well to sign Ricky Jurado. Good luck with that. The Caps also signed Phil LeVan, bum elbow and all, to a 2-year, $2.56M contract.

[Westheim]

In early December and the run-up to the Winter Meetings, the bidding for … (looks at the notes again) … Tatsukichi Yonemura – he’ll need a nickname immediately should he arrive here, because that’s entirely too many syllables for me – kept going back and forth and our offer stopped having a 2 in front and going to a 3. For the total contract length, not per year (snickers). By January, that’d be per month. No, it was eight figures with a leading 3, which were entirely too many numbers for the little dimwit to comprehend anyway.

On the side, we were looking at left-handed relievers, and while there were some killer options like the Gold Sox’ Kelvin Castillo, the Sox had won 97 games and figured they could get past the Warriors somehow, eventually, but not without their closer. So that was not a move that was gonna get made; the Elks had a relatively young lefty, Tyler Walton, with a cutter to die for, and there were two things about the Elks: they were already overbudget by a couple of millions, and you never wanted to leave the Elks with anything that could turn out to be of value… which is why I thought of Cam Jackson. They were not interested though, even as we tried to cover the difference in salaries with loose dosh.

They’d take Crispy Bear, though. Yeah, sure. Always stay loosey-moosey on your side of the border.

The Winter Meetings began with a report that Yonemura had signed with the Titans – that turned out to be false. Instead, he might want more money, and a 6-year rather than a 4-year deal, and at this point the Raccoons began to be pushed out of the conversation.

By the third day of proceedings, I was slipped a note by Cristiano on a drive-by that Yonemura now wanted $34M for a 4-year contract. The Raccoons didn’t even have that budget space readily available. Can we throw a player to the Wolves? Or the wolves, if need be? And we better do it quick…!

+++

December 2 – 30-year-old 3B/2B Carlos Castro (.268, 44 HR, 499 RBI) takes his World Series ring with the Miners and takes it to Cincinnati for a $1.98M contract for 2074.
December 2 – The Thunder sign ex-Condors CL Chris Thompson (29-32, 3.28 ERA, 99 SV) for $3.44M over two years.
December 4 – The Miners win the bidding for ex-Bayhawks OF Jake Ward (.282, 103 HR, 650 RBI) with a 7-year deal worth $37.28M.
December 4 – The Knights sign up former Titans reliever/closer Cody Kleidon (70-83, 3.19 ERA, 403 SV) for $3.16M over two years.
December 4 – The Caps acquire INF Dennis Wright (.243, 12 HR, 81 RBI) from the Rebs in exchange for OF Larry Nelson (.265, 19 HR, 155 RBI).
December 5 – INF/LF Edgar Gonzales (.271, 66 HR, 489 RBI) moves from the Falcons to the Thunder in exchange for right-hander Mike Blanchard (7-9, 4.74 ERA, 13 SV), who appeared in a league-high 89 games in 2073, and a prospect.
December 6 – Richmond wins the services of former Bayhawks backstop Hugo Valdez (.272, 51 HR, 381 RBI) for $18.56M over four years.
December 8 – The Bayhawks acquire catcher Carlos Mora (.230, 6 HR, 70 RBI) from the Falcons for SP/MR Max Hamlin (22-27, 3.98 ERA).

+++

That was the end of the Winter Meetings. Yonemura hadn’t signed, but sure made everybody around him – he was there with an entourage of assistants and translators – sort of mad.

We had not gotten any outlandish offers for some of our starting pitchers, either.

But we have a Hall of Fame ballot…!

[Westheim]

(sits gloomy at his desk, a bowl of snacks untouched, and stares out into the gray afternoon over the ballpark)

+++

December 17 – Japanese free agent slugger Tatsukichi Yonemura settles on an offer from the Knights for $34.4M over four years.
December 19 – The Raccoons acquire left-handed MR Tyler Walton (4-3, 4.37 ERA, 10 SV) from the Canadiens for A-level SS/3B Luis Flores.
December 20 – Former Caps starting pitcher Adam Lunn (157-139, 3.94 ERA) winds up with the Crusaders for a 3-year, $24M contract.
December 21 – Meanwhile the former Crusaders SP Danny Ortiz (154-128, 3.74 ERA) is crossing the last T’s on a 2-year, $13.8M deal with the Knights.

+++

With Yonemura going elsewhere, the Raccoons were back to an outfield of Schneider in center, Licona in right, and soup of the day in leftfield. The pursuit of the brick-brained Yonemura also meant there had been no dosh for any other endeavors and now we were behind on our offseason shopping once more.

I will be open – I have no idea what the Elks find in Luis Flores. He projects as an unremarkable hitter, he has unremarkable defense, not outstanding speed, and he has the attitude of a foul-mouthed megaphone. They specifically asked for him. It was either him, or fellow low-minors infielder Carlo Gradi (the Italian one), or Crispy Bear.

These things are not equal…!?

We’ll revisit this when Flores wins his fourth batting title in ’82.

After the Yonemura disaster the Raccoons turned their attention to free agent Dan Moore, but he was already asking for $42M over six years, and I was getting dizzy from these numbers, because when I had been a spring chicken, you could have bought half a U.S. state with all the cows in that half for $42M…!

Then there were the Loggers and their grotesque Picasso of a roster. Carlos Dominguez had four batting titles and was hitting 20+ homers every year, and despite having tortured the Raccoons for almost a decade, he’d only turn 30 in January. He was also heading for the last year on his contract and surely didn’t mind a way out of Milwaukee, where they looked hellbent on losing a hundred games next season.

The Loggers were by the nature of these things open to trade, and the Raccoons had a surplus starting pitcher anyway, and some other loose bits (relievers especially) that weren’t gonna make the roster. We’d even toss in a prospect starting pitcher (not: McCorkle). In Loggerland, they listened, but they wanted more. They didn’t want Jack Moses or Aldo – they wanted Jimmy Wharton (or Crispy, straight up, but no thanks).

The team was on the table and ready to be signed. Jimmyboy, Cam Jackson, and #91 Tony Trinidad for Carlos Dominguez, and his $5.8M contract for 2074. No further questions asked. Dominguez with his career .349/.428/.505 slash, 1,842 hits, 158 homers, and 859 RBI would surely fit in well with the Raccoons, especially since the left-handed Dominican slugger had a reputation as an auxiliary coach, always pushing his teammates to do more and to train harder. Every aspiring team could use a player like Dominguez, even if he was going to turn to the wrong side of 30.

But I looked at our former #4 pick. I looked Jimmy Wharton in his hazel eyes, while he was mindlessly munching away on his bowlful of kibble, cheeks full and smacking with delight. What a could little critter he was! What a little angel! And he was supposed to go to the Loggers??

And I saw a black bar appear over his head, and in scarlet letters inside the bar, a word appeared.

It said, BETRAYAL.

There he sat, scratching himself behind his ear with the left hindpaw, mid-munch, entirely unaware yet that he was one stamp of approval away to be BETRAYED and sent to Milwaukee.

BETRAYAL.

LIAR.

FRAUD.

(rubs his big black googly eyes to make the picture go away)

No wonder we never win anything.