Yet Another OOTP6 Dynasty, Year 2: One Flew Over the Pale Hose

[MrJones]

Awesome stuff cknox!

[cknox0723]

hey, thanks to the resident lolita fan and I guess the resident counting crows fan for the replies! sorry for the brevity, but in a bit of rush today. so with only a few minutes' adieu for some last-minute editing, here we go...

[cknox0723]

Roughly a year ago, on July 1, 2006, Jon Garland was toting a 2-7 record through his first dozen-plus starts of the season, having struck out 60 batters in 98 frames -- and walked the same number, predictably pushing his ERA up over five. Considering that "Jon Moo" had a 4-15 record the season before, it wouldn't have been a stretch to think that the next number in his sequence of won-lost records was going to be 3.98...in the Atlantic League.

Wind the crank forward to today. Garland's a completely different pitcher, having cut the walk rate while sharpening his breaking ball enough so that he's just not quite so damned hittable. But his opponent in this one, Aaron Harang, looks like vintage Garland, if for some reason you ever wanted to see that. A 1-6 record has been carved out largely because Harang has lost the command of his sinker, and with it, his K/BB has shrunk to a tasty 40/44.

Tasty for opposing batters, at least. And this game is no different. I could get into specific detail, but suffice it to say that we score a couple of runs in the first on a Brian Anderson double to left, with all runners getting on base with two outs. Garland has a few of his usual problems in the bottom half, battling the strike zone and his own fatalistic tendencies and giving a run back. But we move on to the second with the lead, a lead, some sort of lead still intact.

Weird inning. Both sides get a runner in scoring position with no out. Both times, the pitcher comes up and makes an out, and both times, the leadoff man makes the third out. No runs score. The only difference is that Jon Garland bounced out to third, while Harang whiffed, and Ramon Vazquez flew out to the warning track in center field, while Tim Salmon...whiffed.

When in doubt, take the guy with the K's, DIPS says, and likely that's as good a reason as any for what was to follow. Raul Gonzalez jacks a long ball out to Tallahassee (-Pain) with one out in the fourth, but outfielder Juan Encarnacion matches that solo shot with one of his own in the bottom of the fifth, a moonshot to right-center. 3-2. Close game, yes?

Nah, don't be silly. The Rays can't hit and can't pitch and don't have the HEARRRRRT to make up for it. In the top of the sixth, we mount another furious two-out charge, with rookie Clint King coming off the bench to bat in Garland's slot and deliver the big blow, a sharp two-run single to right field. A small lead becomes a comfortable one, and thanks to Otsuka, Calero, and Gallo, the three-headed bullpen monster, it's never anything but.



CHW 5 TB 2

WP: J. Garland (7-5) - 5 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 2 BB, 4 K
LP: A. Harang (1-7) - 5.2 IP, 8 H, 5 R, 3 BB, 2 K
S: M. Gallo (1/2) - I do not remember how many saves Gallo has, but **** 'im, this one shouldn't count anyway

Improbable Starters: Charlie Zink started the year in Florida's minor league system. Still trapped in double-A at the age of 27, the knuckleballer could scarcely hope to be even the future Jared Fernandez. Then he won four of his first six starts at AA, got the call-up...and did it again. With the fishy implosion of now former Sergio Mitre (more on that at some point), Zink got the call to the bigs on June 9th and proceeded to watch the floater dance like never before. Four innings in, he was still no-hitting Saint Loo, and after six, he had a hot shower and a 6-1-0-0-0-2 line for the scrapbook. The 'pen held it, and Charlie Zink had made one hell of a debut.

After a couple successful years in the high minors, Gabe Ribas was definitely ready for a big league role this season, but what that role would be was rather undefined. But the Crew up in Milwaukee found out while down in Florida that Ribas had a decent sinking fastball and a big, sweeping slider that's more like a deuce and...nothing else. So off to the 'pen he went, along with erstwhile starters Wade Miller and Doug Davis, who have scarcely had even 10% of the success of their real-life counterparts in this world.

Ribas, this short, skinny righty, displayed excellent command over his first 20 games and 35 innings, walking just four, and after mediocre 27 year old righty Andy Good was dispatched to a desperate Philadelphia ballclub on the fifteenth of June (more on that one later, too)...

The stage was set. Somehow, these two most unlikely starters ended up opposing one another on this day. Their performance was less than stellar, as neither made it into the fifth inning. Zink took the loss while Todd Van Poppel and his delicious 8.40 ERA picked up the win with 2.2 innings of half-decent relief in lieu of the mostly ineffective Gabe Ribas.

However, this story doesn't have to have a happy ending and, hell, it probably won't - these two are not future superstars. But there are certainly less interesting tales of 27 year olds out there, yes?

[The Funk]

What? You're still winning?!!!?!?!?!?!Ausrufezeichen

Craig ------>

Also, when you gonna update The Hitchikers Guide to the Pale Hose? Here's a crazy idea, you stick your full active roster (and interesting minors) on it, with info where appropriate. If a guy gets traded, write that down but leave him on the list. Add new players to the end of the list so it's easy to see who came first. That way, all us Pale Hose fans will have a thorough reference list of the personel. It's quite a big job, but I think I can pressure you into doing it, plus it would be amazing.

I'd be happy to do some of the work, especially in the supervising and delegating fields.

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by The Funk

It's quite a big job, but I think I can pressure you into doing it, plus it would be amazing.

I'd be happy to do some of the work, especially in the supervising and delegating fields.

yeah, an update to that is definitely forthcoming, but probably not until the All-Star break. because I am lazy (as lazy as a guy with a 700-post dynasty can be), but also because I get the feeling [SPOILER ALERT] that the face of the team may be changing very soon [/SPOILER]. but not before I poll all of you lot, at least, so I can get my arse completely reamed for destroying whatever future this franchise may have.

it will probably be in a new thread, though, likely titled "the restaurant at the end of the universe" or something similar. just an FYI!

here comes an update with many words, some strung together in sentences and others randomly inserted.

[cknox0723]

We head into the third game of a 4-gamer in Tampa having allowed more than four runs just twice in the last ten games, but our offense hasn't been on the same upswing. My lack of confidence is fully, sadly rewarded when consecutive singles to left by 2B Ramon Vazquez and Brian Anderson lead to absolutely zilch, mostly squelched by a comebacker off Magglio Ordonez's bat that Tampa moundsman Seth McClung handles deftly to start a 1-6-3 double play. To start the bottom half, Ryan Franklin gets a similar bouncer back to him off the bat of Rocco "The Woonsocket Rocket" Baldelli. But the opposition's second hitter, young outfielder Jason Pridie, hits a little Woonsocket chopper that bounces up over Franklin's head and seemingly into center field...but for Ramon Vazquez, starting at second base for the first time this year after 90+ starts there last year. "Pokey" makes a backhanded flash of the leather and rifles the sphere across his body over to first for a bang-bang out. No rest for the weary, but no rust for infielders on a little sabbatical at shortstop, huh?

Guess not, but Vazquez will get that rest, because apparently that up-the-middle play -- one he doesn't have to make at short -- tickled the rust in his back. Pale Hose nation, hold your breath, because out comes our offensive and defensive catalyst with an injury, all because I had some stupid idea to rest Adam Kennedy and stick newly-acquired Jack Wilson at short. And the manager's a f*cktard!

Apparently the rest of the team is holding its breath, too. Franklin gets out of the first with another ground ball, but doesn't have that chance in the second after an offensive 1-2-3 top half from our "offense." A leadoff walk to Mark Kotsay is followed by a bouncer to short off the bat of the opposition's best hitter, .300 hitting third sacker Andy Phillips, but the supposed defensive wizard Jack Wilson muffs that one. Another walk two batters later loads the bases with one out, but with anemic-hitting backstop Mike Barrett and the pitcher comin' up, you'd think we might get out of the inning. Franklin does retire Barrett, but it's on a medium-range fly ball to left, and Brian Anderson's peg home is just a bit outside. And high. And awful. It allows the other two runners to move up, but luckily the pitcher McClung bounces one to new second baseman Enrique Wilson and we're only down a run. Despite not allowing a hit, so there's no solace to be found in that deficit.

The third inning is boring, as the aesthetically challenged say. I prefer the term 'quaint', like a cottage up in Maine. (Or the fishing village Scarborough) "Buddha" Ordonez singles to left to start the fourth, and after Eric Munson whiffs some serious cheddar, Yorvit! hits a comebacker that the West Virginia native McClung can't handle. Nifty -- a base hit means a run. But Raul Gonzalez hits into a 3-6 force and Frank Thomas (where did I come up with this lineup?) flies out to shallow left-center.

With one out in the next half-frame, Andy Phillips rakes some of those pesky leaves on a blast to left, a rare four-bagger for the line drive hitter. Yorvit! eventually matches that blast with one of his own that just clears the wall in left, but it's the eighth inning by that point and I get the odd feeling that it's too little, too late. When Proven Closer (TM) Ray King comes out of the 'pen for the ninth, that feeling turns into a sickly sort of dread as Frank Thomas and One of the Infielding Wilsons (ewww!) and Olivo go down feebly against the hard-throwing southpaw. And in spite of last-place Tampa doing their best to run themselves out of a victory, getting thrown out four times on the basepaths in two of the middle innings, despite of a complete game four-hitter from Ryan Franklin, the whole pitching-and-defense thing just didn't work out against a guy named McClung who touches the upper nineties.

Obviously the is not dancing for our offense right now, but maybe it'll dance for fifth starter Michael Nannini in the final game of the set, especially since he's opposed by a 28 year old named Jeremy Guthrie who's making his first start of the season and just sixth career. And, trust me, those first six weren't much to write home about. But we can't manage to punch the ball out of the infield in the top of the first, with the only bright note being that Ramon Vazquez made the first of those outs, meaning that he put a little oil on the rust in his back and got the OK to keep playing.

Nannini fans "The Woonsocket Rocket" to start the home half and then retires left fielder Juan Encarnacion on a bouncer to short, but then the monsters crawl out from under the bed again as Mark Kotsay thumps a double to right and comes around to score two batters later on a single by light-hitting utility man Geoff Blum. He may be the worst choice for any team ever to start at first base, but what the hell, it's the Pale Hose, right? Somehow Deivi Cruz strikes out instead of hitting that knife-twisting three-run tater, but one run seems like fifty right now. I mean, with innings like this...

1B Frank Catalanotto:
Singles to short center field.

3B Eric Munson:
Strikes out swinging.

CF Brian Anderson:
Strikes out looking.

LF Clint King:
Strikes out looking.

...who the hell needs more than a one-run edge?

Nannini's troubles are nil in the bottom of the second, but you don't exactly need a dancing banananana to retire a sickly trio of journeyman John Hattig, Uribe-tastic backstop Barrett, and some pitcher.

Speaking of the pitcher Guthrie, Miguel Olivo greets his first offering in the third inning with a heave of lumber, and the ball flies over short for a leadoff base knock. Nannini executes a perfect sacrifice, something that Jon Garland can't seem to do. Up steps Ramon Vazquez, aching back and all.

"Guthrie rocks and fires a one-one fastball...hard shot near the second base bag, great stop by Baldiris, who scrambles up and pegs it to first -- not in time! Oh, Vazquez dove into the first base bag with reckless abandon and just beat the throw. Great hustle play on both ends, and now the Pale Hose have runners at the corners with one out."

That's why most everyone still loves Pete Rose, you know, the hustle. Vazquez's infield hit motivates our offense, if you believe in that sort of thing, as we wake out of our game (or week) long slumber with a roar. Adam Kennedy whacks a single over the head of first baseman Blum (ha!) to tie the game and keep us in the same situation, runners at the corners with one out. And then the journeyman Guthrie comes unglued a bit, first bouncing a pitch that scoots by Mike Barrett and allows "Pokey" to come home, and then losing "Buddha" to a walk. A double steal works perfectly, another run comes home when Frank Catalanotto literally swings a perfect bunt up the first base line and no one covers home, forcing backstop Barrett to take the out at first. An error by second baseman Baldiris gives us a fourth run, the snakebitten Rays make two baserunning blunders the next half-frame, and it's smooth sailing the rest of the way save for the second home run of the series for light-hitting shortstop Deivi Cruz. (WHAT THE HELL IS WITH DEIVI F***ING CRUZ GOING ALL ENRIQUE WILSON-VS.-PEDRO ON US??? )

But it's a solo shot, and Tampa starter Guthrie is chased by the next half-frame, the top of the fifth, when we add a fifth run onto the board. Unheralded foot soldiers Parker and Walker and Grabow do an admirable job to keep the game close through the middle and late innings, but ain't no glory in pitching behind, so it's Calero and Bevis and Gallo who get the glory in closing out a 5-3 ballgame.

I know it's just the lowly Devil Rays, but every 'W' we notch on our belt is another game that isn't a loss. And we're just the Pale Hose, after all. Three outta four ain't bad for anyone.

Back home for four with the Empire, and then three with Texas. Here comes a key stretch in determining just what the hell kind of bunch we've got here.

[ifspuds]

A couple friends and I used to call Deivi Cruz "The First Shortstop On The Moon". It's a long story, and not actually all that funny, but I bring it up just to say that maybe you should deviously send him into orbit lest he do more damage against you in the future.

[cknox0723]

On April thirteenth, we played the Yankees for the first time in this 2007 season, with 22 year old phenom and 2006 Rookie of the Year Tyler Clippard on the mound for a club that was 5-1 at the time and had won 109 games the year prior. The Pale Hose were 1-6, with the slightest of hope only because a deal for a man named Catalanotto had just been announced.

Originally Posted by Y0DA55

Nice Pickup! I thought you were in need of some sort of jump start. I think your battery has been dead this season and I hope that "Dressing" can be the salad tosser.

^^Pretty apt assessment of what I was thinking at the time. We got our jump start on April 13, not from "Dressing" (who didn't dress), but from Adam Kennedy, Magglio Ordonez, and Esteban Loaiza. Kennedy slammed a one-out double in the first inning and came home on the Magglio Ordonez single that followed, giving us a 1-0 lead that we never relinquished. We never relinquished it because Esteban was fooking brilliant, tossing a three-hit complete game shutout and not allowing a single runner past second base, but for good measure, Kennedy added three more doubles after his first inning two-bagger. One of those was followed up by an Ordonez moonshot, the club added a bunch of late tallies off a stink Bomber of a bullpen, and we had ourselves a sweet little 7-0 victory.

That was our only win in that three-game set, but it was the first hint that maybe 70 (70!) wins were within reach this year. When we next met up with the Empire, it was the very end of May, and we were just around .500 and just around the top (and bottom) of the AL Central. Of course Schizo Jorge got his ass handed to him in the first game. 12-2 losses. But then we won one (1111), a tight 2-1 extra-inning victory that you can check out right heah if you want to stroll down memory lane. Brings us to the rubber match, where we face the young right-hander Clippard for the second time. Co-inky-dentally enough, Esteban is our moundsman. Shortening a long story, he gets his face bashed in, Alex Rodriguez drives in seven runs, and the few runs we manage off "The Yankee Clippard" aren't near enough. Hindsight has me wondering whether the 12-7 loss wasn't just the response of the baseball gods for sitting Adam Kennedy when he hit four doubles the first time he faced that pitcher, but giving up that many runs, we could have had Shoeless Jack himself in the lineup and it probably wouldn't've mattered.

Anyway, bring yourself back to the here and now. We're playing the Yankees in the Second City for the first time this year, and wouldn't you know it, facing Clippard once again. "Gumby" Kennedy is in the lineup this time, but it's Mark Buehrle and not Loaiza on the mound. May not need seven runs then, not with our ace on the mound, right?

Well...we're on the short end of the score before we've even swung the bats against live pitching, because an innocent two-out single by Alex Rodriguez turns into a run when left fielder Randy Winn drives a double. A couple innings come, a couple innings go...and it's Winn on the spot again in the third, and again he brings "Slappy" home, this time with a one-bagger. The next frame, Buehrle strikes out the side (1B Giambi, C Lunsford, and the pitcher Clippard) after a leadoff single by Marcus Giles, but it don't mean no nothin'. "McDreamy" Jeter leads off the next frame with a single, moves into scoring position on an ironic sacrifice by the man called "Godzilla" in his native Japan, and then moves over to third on A-Rod's 4-3 groundout. Now, there's no way that Randy F. Winn will come through again, is there?

Crack. Outside fastball, Winn goes with it and the sphere finds no leather to fly into. He's just another outfielder against right-handed pitchers, perhaps notable only for his terrible throwing arm, but toss a southpaw out there and he's every legendary hitter wrapped into one. Maybe the chap's left-eye dominant.

We make it a game in the fifth, though, gamely touching up Clippard for some runs. Rookie outfielder Clint King starts the inning with a base knock and then Yorvit!, spudsy's boy, pounds a double. A couple batters later, Adam Kennedy (him again!) pounds a hit, and then Brian Anderson ropes a two-bagger to tie the game up.

Nice try, nice try, but Winn's three hits in those three RBI situations were a bad omen, and the bullpen just don't keep us in it. First it's my boy PJ Bevis throwing the ball everywhere but in the catcher's mitt in the seventh, and then it's "Wild Man" Ankiel tossing straight fastballs and getting clobbered in the ninth to put the game well out of reach. We faced Tyler Clippard in April and scored seven runs and we faced him in the beginning of June and scored seven runs. Third time sure wasn't a charm as June winds down. Seven runs? Hmmm, not so much. But it wouldn't've mattered anyway.

NYY 9 CHW 4

WP: T. Clippard (4-3) - Kid is 22 years and 4 months young and already had 15 career wins. Many, many more are comin'. **** the Empire.
LP: PJ Bevis (0-2)
S: D. Weathers (17)

[Jestor]

Maybe you should try trading for Clippard.

[The Funk]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

but also because I get the feeling [SPOILER ALERT] that the face of the team may be changing very soon [/SPOILER]

w00t. About bloody time!

Originally Posted by cknox0723

it will probably be in a new thread, though, likely titled "the restaurant at the end of the universe" or something similar. just an FYI!

Nice. How about: 'The Line-up from the Dregs of the Universe' or something like that?

When's there gonna be a Pale Hose website?

EDIT: And now I'm a major leaguer so my ideas must be taken seriously!

[cknox0723]

hey, some nice replies! and one extra because I missed it first time around.

Originally Posted by ifspuds

A couple friends and I used to call Deivi Cruz "The First Shortstop On The Moon". It's a long story, and not actually all that funny, but I bring it up just to say that maybe you should deiviously send him into orbit lest he do more damage against you in the future.

^fixed that for ya

I bet that the story behind that is funny, or at least worth telling, because that is an awesome nickname. So, get to it!!!

Originally Posted by Jestor

Maybe you should try trading for Clippard.

I know there is a smiley face, so maybe the post was not all that serious, but still feel like I have to respond with a resounding "Hell, no." In addition to the fact that we have nothing to give the Yanks for the 22 year old (+1 to OOTP's AI for that), what fun is it to trade for other teams' top prospects? It is not especially realistic (even taking into consideration, for example, the real-life moves this offseason by Florida) and particularly when you account for New York's position in the standings. Clippard can help them win, and at 22 years old no less, so why trade him?

Occasionally I have to remind myself that it is OK to give myself a little leeway, it is just a baseball text sim, but I don't see the point to winning at whatever costs the game allows me. I think the trades and signings I have made have been reasonable; when I don't feel the way, I try to compensate for it. (One example you will see in next year's thread is bumps in the salaries of the free agents we signed this year, Garland and Kennedy and whoever else. Not because of good or bad performance, but because I think it seems reasonable to do. Otherwise, we will eventually end up with millions of dollars and be able to easily acquire superstars, and where is the fun in that?)

However, your mileage may vary. And that's OK, too!

Originally Posted by The Funk

w00t. About bloody time!

if/when the moves I am contemplating actually take place, it will be a total mind****, for certain. I can promise you that neither Buehrle nor Ordonez will go, however, and the same goes for Esteban. It will be a sad day when he is pitching for another club, and that despite his atrocious season chronicled in the first thread.

Originally Posted by The Funk

Nice. How about: 'The Line-up from the Dregs of the Universe' or something like that?

point, Funk. I like that one quite a bit.

Originally Posted by The Funk

When's there gonna be a Pale Hose website?

As for this, I don't know. I am not very tech-savvy, and would be clueless in how to start a website. But I have considered releasing the files, so anyone could play with the Pale Hose file if they wanted.

However, I think both are probably goals for the (somewhat) distant future. I mean, hell, this dynasty has not even finished a second year yet.

It's amazing, you know, there have been dynasties that have simulated the entire length of Major League history (and beyond) in the length that it has taken the Pale Hose to play a half-dozen or dozen games. Three cheers for this forum.

Originally Posted by The Funk

EDIT: And now I'm a major leaguer so my ideas must be taken seriously!

I had half a mind when I saw just how many posts I was getting out of the Pale Hose, that when the post count hit 1999 I would either create a new name or just disappear for-evah. Then I scrapped it, because I realized that would be like not voting in McGriff to the Hall of Fame he didn't hit 500 home runs (only four hundred eighty-some), and plus no one would understand WTF I was talking about when I said "Hacktastic Julio!!!" after seeing Julio Lugo on TV. Of course no one understands WTF I am talking about when I say that, anyway.

Well, I was going to provide an update but I am all typed out. Plus it is not exactly an update I want to provide, so I'll wait a day or so and hope against hope that things changed.

[cknox0723]

So, it unfortunately appears that the Pale Hose are going to have to take a seat on the bench (next to the spirit of Juan Uribe) for a little while. I am fine, but the long and short of the matter is that I have no access to the Pale Hose for the time being, and a few obligations I need to take care of as well.

However, all is not bad out here in the badlands. It is a good time for a break, because the club has not yet faded from the division race and there's still about 90 games to actually look forward to. The thread is about to hit 10,000 views. And the dynasty countdowns are coming up (get your votes in!!!)...so there should be plenty of reading in the meantime, and likely better than this mess to boot.

I'll still be around, too, and even posting in here from time to time. Obviously I can't move forward with the season or even provide any stats, but there are some observations and crap that I might want to say occasionally, and so why the hell not, better than letting the thread sink to page eight.

And the Pale Hose will be back in all their full-fledged "hacktasticness", maybe later rather than sooner, but eventually. As Babe Ruth said in that ridiculous movie, "Heroes get remembered, kid, but Pale Hose never die. They just rot in the laundry hamper until they smell like ****. Follow your nose and you'll never go wrong."

[Jestor]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

And the Pale Hose will be back in all their full-fledged "hacktasticness", maybe later rather than sooner, but eventually. As Babe Ruth said in that ridiculous movie, "Heroes get remembered, kid, but Pale Hose never die. They just rot in the laundry hamper until they smell like ****. Follow your nose and you'll never go wrong."

Dude.

I'd *so* hit it with Wendy Pfeffercorn.

[ifspuds]

I'll miss the Pale Hose. Hope all goes well for you during their hiatus!

[CTSoxFan]

I to will miss the Pale Hose.

Check out my Pirates dynasty while this is away. *cheap plug*

[DAL 9000]

You and your "obligations," Craig. When will you learn to set priorities?

[zukes]

damit, I need a Pale Hose fix.

[Vris]

Good bump.

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by Vris

Good bump.

Agreed.

Happy New Year's, all. One of my myriad resolutions is to get the Pale Hose back up and running, all the way into a third thread. It'll still be a few weeks (but hopefully no more) before I can update you kind folks on the plight or lack thereof of this fake ballclub, but I am looking forward to returning.

In the meantime, I hope to figure out whether or not this team is going to compete this year. I don't see much hope for the next few years, because even though prospects like SP C. Scarborough and middle infielder H. Made will be maturing, so, too, will our division rivals. And Cleveland, for example, has more up-and-coming outfielders (named Brimer, Sizemore, and if I recall, Michael Conroy) than we have legitimate prospects in our entire system. So I'm not too optimistic about 2008 in this universe, though of course much can change 'til then and even if we do suck, it apparently makes for good reading.

That information would tend to make you think that this is the year, especially since we are still in the race with the All-Star break approaching ever so slowly. But maybe we're already over our heads. It's made me consider silly, irrational things, like trading one of our two prospects for some major-league help, taking a shot at the division while completely destroying our future.

If you've got a few hours, go back and read the last few pages if you like, get a more precise sense of exactly where we are and think about what you'd do if this was your solo league. That's the beauty of this forum, isn't it? Lend me your suggestions, your criticisms, and when this whopper of a "dynasty" finally resumes, lend me your ears and maybe we'll get something worth reading. In the meantime, don't try the veal...it's just nasty how that thing ends up on your plate.

[orin2]

I demand some kind of action. Yes, this is my first post... so what? Here I just slogged -read: enjoyed laughing my butt off- through a year and a half of Pale Hose History (PHH) and now they are on hiatus? NO WAY.



How long until we see some movement?!