Yet Another OOTP6 Dynasty, Year 2: One Flew Over the Pale Hose

[cknox0723]

Chad Bentz is a name I wanted to squeeze in to the Montreal preview, but couldn't, but rather than let him drop, I'm giving him a whole separate post.

Why a whole separate post for a guy struggling to be the last reliever out of the 'pen for a team that could well finish in last? Well, check out Mr. Bentz's minor league numbers from the last three seasons:

YEAR		ERA	IP	BB	K	WHIP
'04 (AA)	2.33	54	17	51	1.24
'05 (AA)	2.02	84.2	24	71	1.00
'06 (AAA)	2.98	51.1	14	42	1.09
'06 (MLB)	0.00	3.1	0	3	0.90

This sucker can pitch. This sucker is also a native of Juneau, Alaska. Think about that for a second. How the hell does a kid from Alaska grow up to be a ballplayer? And this is not a Joe Crede or Juan Uribe, here, this is someone who's going to pitch quality innings in the major leagues if it means I have to pick him up in trade. Does the sun even shine during the daytime in Alaska? I don't think it does.

But Chad Bentz isn't extraordinary because he's Alaskan and has put up good AAA numbers in this universe. Want to know why I'm really writing a whole post about Chad Bentz? Read this: http://www.juneauempire.com/stories/...po_bentz.shtml

Towards the bottom, the local Alaskan rag drops these lines in:

Originally Posted by Charles Bingham of the Juneau Empire

For a relatively unknown rookie trying to make his first major league roster, Bentz has drawn more than the usual amount of media attention. Bentz was born with a deformed right hand, what he calls his "birthmark," and pitches and catches with his left hand, switching his glove between hands like former major leaguer Jim Abbott.

In a 1,000 word article, that's the only mention of the reason why I'm writing this right now. The rest is about the local kid trying to stick in the bigs. How many millions of kids play some form of youth baseball? 5 million? 10 million? And this is one of the guys that made it all the way to the top, beating the 1,000,000 to 1 odds or whatever it is. A guy with only one fully-developed arm. Why the hell doesn't everyone know about this guy like they did with Jim Abbott?

For all I know, Chad Bentz is the kind of guy who would walk up to some chica and after getting rejected, hand her a business card that says, "Chad Bentz, MLB pitcher." And he's not even really an MLB pitcher, so that would make him an even bigger tool than he'd otherwise be. But even if Chad Bentz is really like that, overcoming what he has is astounding. You hear stories all the time about people that rise out of poverty to become a heart surgeon, or someone that jumps into a burning car to rescue another person and gets paralyzed in the process, and what Chad Bentz has done isn't anywhere comparable to that. But this ain't chopped liver, either.

Modern-day leagues aren't about "trading 4 pujlos" because "hes the best in mlb!", and they're not even about winning the damned World Series. The real reason I love 'em is for stories like this that ought to be told before they're forgotten. Never mind Eric "law is strick" Cyr or Hacktastic Julio Lugo, go try and find Chad Bentz in your fictional league. If he's there, I'll be glad to delete all players and have a redraft. Heck, it's not as if the Pale Hose couldn't use a fresh start. But you and I both know it isn't going to happen.

I know that this stuff just shows how I'm just a big softie at heart. But what baseball fan isn't?

[Vris]

Heartwarming story Craig.

[ifspuds]

I think you could find a Chad Bentz in a fictional league if you only thought of the story on your own. But I understand where you're coming from: truth is stranger than fiction, and you couldn't make this stuff up. I'll stop with the cliches there, and finish by saying that this is a cool story and thanks for giving it a post, Craig.

[cknox0723]

Thanks, gents, I'm glad that my playing messenger was worth it. Interestingly, we will go from that "heartwarming" post to, um, something completely different. I like this next post, though. But before we get to that...

Originally Posted by

I would expect it to be Sister.

...just wanted to quote this A-1 Aces line. And the day that Terrmel "Sister Sledge" gets traded to Pittsburgh, never expect to hear the end of it.

[MattStewNYY]

Speaking of Sledge, I have been inspired by your style Mr. Knox, and am utilizing it to do an MVP 2005 dynasty over at MVPMania.com.

Nationals Owner Mode Dynasty

Going to give them a little CKnox flavor with my own little twist. See how they like that curveball.

[cknox0723]

Jason Jennings, ace
in Coors, now here. Expansion
dilutes the talent pool.

Guess who won seventeen
last year? Paul Wilson. Next year,
he'll get $10 mill.

Dontrelle Willis, from
West coast. Fun to watch, big leg
kick. Still DIPS victim.

Josh Karp pitches for
Marlins. How quaint. Too bad it's
as well as a trout.

A bullpen full o'
journeymen. That lacks foresight,
as the Hose well know.

Good relief ace, though. Tim
Spooneybarger. Long ass name.
I'll call him "Spoon Ass"!

Florida, where old
outfielders go to die. Free
Miguel Cabrera!

On second thought, he
starts in left anyway. That'll teach
them to avoid Juan Gone.

Double play duo -- Seifrig
and...Roy? Nope, Will F. Harris.
The 'F' means "f***tard".

No Delgado here.
1B -- OBP Jesus.
More like Alou, though.

Catchers may bloom late,
but Josh Willingham just sucks.
Still no Piazza.

Mike Lowell's solid.
Consistent as you can get.
But this team needs Bonds.

SS J. Wilson.
Not Jack, but Josh. Hacking mass.
Julio Wilson?

SS prospect Powell --
fifth pick, near ready. Will hit,
but "fields" like Jeter.

Just saw Sean Burroughs,
wasting away in three-A.
Play nine third basemen?

Florida was 4th.
Lost Castillo, signed no one.
This year, World Series!

Hope springs eternal.
But in geriatric land,
none. Coincidence?

[Vris]

Awesome post Craig.

[Jestor]

Got to love the haiku

[cknox0723]

Thanks for the comments, guys. Been a rough day, so excuse the brevity -- oh, and Matt, once I get a moment I plan to sign up for those forums and check your dynasty out. I expect big things.

[cknox0723]

Much to my chagrin, this Philly club sizzles like the steaks the city's famous for. They have no catcher -- someone with two first names, Josh Paul, is their only option there -- but they'll get above-average production from most every other position. These are flawed players, sure -- Chase Utley barely got on base at a 30% clip last year, their three-headed third base monster of Jimenez, Nakamaru, and Nevin is...well, you come up with your own witty line about a decapitated cerberus. Oh, and Bob Abreu hit just .248 last year. But Pat Burrell. Jim Thome, and Abreu will combine for over 100 big hlies, and Marlon Byrd's not too shabby, either -- .310/.360/.455 for the average, OBP, and SLG if you run a quick and dirty Marcel projection on his last three seasons' worth of numbers. The Phightin' Phils were 8th in the league in run scoring last year, and nothing seems so out of sort that they wouldn't do that again.

The pitching will make or break this bunch, but they've got a strong backbone in Vicente Padilla, a certifiable ace who may not allow 46 less hits than innings again, but should still be good for 35 solid starts and perhaps 17 wins. Frankie Cordero's a quality closer, with an ERA in the mid-twos a near-lock, and his setup men, who weren't bad last year, should be...well, richer, if nothing else. Damaso Marte, our old friend, nicknamed "Shoeless", and knuckleballer Trever Miller are the hired guns to do the seventh and eighth inning dirty work this year.

But all is not peachy in Philadelphia. The lineup's great, the bullpen's strong, they've got an ace, but they're going to need 800 innings from their other four starters to apparently grow from some magic beans. The four mulattos behind Padilla are as bad a group as I've seen so far, on par with Chris Reitsma and Edgar Gonzalez and Darrell Rasnar.

Jason Johnson's the best of the bunch, a decent back end guy. His upside is what he did last year -- 10-8, 4.03 ERA, 175 innings. If he pitches in a bit of a poor luck, leaves a changeup or three up in the zone -- watch out, because he'll go from 'average' to 'duck and cover'. Such is the life of a nibbler who fans 4.5 per nine.

Jon Lieber's 36 and pitched pound for pound as well as Johnson did last year. You want to bet on him improving? Sure, anything's possible -- but as your number two starter?

Better than 26 year old Brett Myers as the three, though. His ERA last year? 5.12. For comparison, Dr. Loaiza's was 5.32, and he lost 16. 5.12 is pretty damned terrible in this league. "Ah, but he's young," you're thinking. "Potential." If it's there, he's kept it well hidden, as his career ERA in nearly 800 major-league innings is 4.58.

And Mike Hampton and Darren Dreifort will engage in an all out scrum for the fifth starter's slot. Dreifort might keep the ERA under five; Hampton shows no reason that you would think that.

Imagine if the injury bug bites. Cole Hamels, a 23 year old southpaw, won 10 in AAA last year, but a year after going 5-12. No one else looks ready. This rotation is worse than the one in Chicago. It's a shame. This ballclub is like that first used car you drive -- may not look perfect, but it looks like it'll work well enough. And it's wheels, baby! It's a car, damn it, who cares what it looks like? You can go wherever the open road will take you!

And then you realize the transmission's shot, and you end up on the side of the road in the rain. Randy Wolf, now in Los Angeles, was this team's transmission. 200 innings of league-average ball, maybe slightly above -- this club should have busted open the piggy bank for Josh Towers. Wolf would have been worth five wins to this team. It's five wins they'll sorely, sorely miss, because they'll end up on the outside looking in because of it.

[gordyhulten]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

Double play duo -- Seifrig
and...Roy? Nope, Will F. Harris.
The 'F' means "f***tard".

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by gordyhulten

I quote the tongue-sticking-out smiley not because I have anything great to say beyond "f***tard", but for the simple reason that I am bumping this solely because there are 20 people in the forums right now. Comic relief, what can I say?

P.S. Willie Harris was actually formerly with the Pale Hose. Two years ago he was in our AAA system and one of the many malcontents that I cut. Two years later he's starting in the bigs. Who'd a'thunk it?

[The Funk]

God damn it! I was thinking of using haikus somewhere along the line, you beat me to the punch by a long margin. Still, I'll probably wait a few months until I hope everyone's forgotten and do it anyway And for the record, I call dibs on sonnets!

Originally Posted by cknox0723

Imagine if the injury bug bites. Cole Hamels, a 23 year old southpaw, won 10 in AAA last year, but a year after going 5-12. No one else looks ready. This rotation is worse than the one in Chicago. It's a shame. This ballclub is like that first used car you drive -- may not look perfect, but it looks like it'll work well enough. And it's wheels, baby! It's a car, damn it, who cares what it looks like? You can go wherever the open road will take you!

And then you realize the transmission's shot, and you end up on the side of the road in the rain. Randy Wolf, now in Los Angeles, was this team's transmission. 200 innings of league-average ball, maybe slightly above -- this club should have busted open the piggy bank for Josh Towers. Wolf would have been worth five wins to this team. It's five wins they'll sorely, sorely miss, because they'll end up on the outside looking in because of it.

I love this, great analogy and I love the ending sentence. I don't know if it was intentional or not, but the "outside looking in" comment fits in beautifully with the "on the side of the road in the rain" part. Or maybe that's just me having to do too many mind-numbingly boring analytical essays. Great stuff, as always!

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by The Funk

God damn it! I was thinking of using haikus somewhere along the line, you beat me to the punch by a long margin. Still, I'll probably wait a few months until I hope everyone's forgotten and do it anyway And for the record, I call dibs on sonnets!

Oh, sonnets are tough, though. I gave up shortly after my attempts to rhyme Willingham and "flatulence" proved to be in vain. I'll be all the more impressed if you pull it off.

Originally Posted by The Funk

I love this, great analogy and I love the ending sentence. I don't know if it was intentional or not, but the "outside looking in" comment fits in beautifully with the "on the side of the road in the rain" part. Or maybe that's just me having to do too many mind-numbingly boring analytical essays. Great stuff, as always!

I would love to say that I consciously thought up that line...but I'll set aside my modesty for once and say that my sub-conscious probably had a good handle on it all along. Thanks for your comments, they've provided me with plenty to chew on. Now get back to "For Want of a Decent Title", ya slacker!

[cknox0723]

A team that won 85 last year despite their run totals projecting a better mark. A crackling good lineup with the only notable hole wearing a mask and various ignorant tools made of plastic. No jokes about me being worn by John Estrada, please. A shaky rotation. Haven't we heard this song and dance before?

Well, yeah, so I'll limit this little ditty on the Woo-Woo Braves to a short medley. Just like Philadelphia, this club can pound that little white pill the same as the boys from Ball Four pounded the ol' Budweiser. Ryan Klesko, coming on for many millions, will only help the cause, at least this year. Raffy Furcal is the catalyst, and his DP partner, 27 year old Jake Gautreau, hit .330 last year and won Rookie of the Year honors. Even if the two don't combine for 350 hits again, an outfield of Chipper Jones, Carlos Beltran, and J.D. Drew is as formidable as you'd expect from hearing those names. Aramis Ramirez finishes a frightening front seven off, and only the aforementioned catcher Estrada won't do serious damage with the bat. He won't need to. The only worry is the outfield depth, but most every team is a little lacking somewhere.

The real worry for this club is pitching. Philadelphia has a deep, solid bullpen, but a rotation that leaves a little wanting. Atlanta's entire pitching staff leaves a little wanting, and instead of Leo Mazzone, this club has Ben Stroup, whose surname sounds like some disease you'd acquire in the jungles of South America.

Stroup the Medicine Man and his magic potions have worked on the nomadic Dan Miceli, who's thrown 180 innings over the past two years with a fine ERA around three, but the veteran is 36 years old this season -- and slated to be the team's closer. That should be a big tell as to the rest of the 'pen's quality, and even though the numbers aren't terrible, per se, there are pitchers with noticeable flaws everywhere you look. Kevin Gryboski and Andy "holyroller" Brown constantly fight the strike zone, rather than embrance it. Buddy Hernandez, a stathead favorite, can't strike anybody out. And setup man Will Cunnane is...well, he's Will Cunnane. His career ERA's 4.65 for a reason. One run game, one man out in the eighth and Carlos Zambrano's out of gas. Are these the kind of guys you really want to turn to?

But while Philly has a chasmic edge in the bullpen, Atlanta's rotation isn't quite a nuclear waste dump. It's not straight out of the mid-90's, either, but how can you expect that? The Good Zambrano, acquired two offseasons ago for Andruw Jones, resembles Victor somewhat in that he fights his control -- but not constantly, and this Zambrano can certainly dial it up on the radar gun. Best of all, he's 25 and signed for a mere $5 million a year for the next four seasons. Brett Evert will be around 'til then, too, though the major league sophomore is actually a year Zambrano's senior. He won 16 last year with an ERA just shy of league average, and the Braves will need a repeat performance to seriously contend. To do that, Evert will probably have to cut out the long ball from his diet, as he gorged on 33 of those last year.

Beyond that, things are rather icky, but that's still better than the Phils. Lance Cormier, another youngster, went 5-12 in his rookie campaign, but, hell, Glavine probably did, too. Cormier's 26, though. He probably ain't even Pete Smith. Josh Fogg went a sparkling 14-5 last year with a nice 3.41 ERA, but my scout thinks he should be trampled by wild boars. Why he hates a guy with 49 career wins and an OK 4.26 ERA is beyond my scope of vision, but it'll be something to keep an eye on. The fifth starter appears to be Steve "The Trash" Trachsel, but he's garbage. There are some sort-of recognizable, sort-of possibly passable guys in AAA, though, and last year's first rounder, 18 year old Dan Stanley, might just pull a Zack Greinke on the league if he finds out he's actually left-handed and has been conned all this time. Or maybe not.

As down on Philly as I irrationally am, that same part of me likes this team. Maybe it's the Mazzone effect, or maybe it's that I wrote so much, I don't know. But so much for a short medley. So, Mr. Fish, what do you think of this bunch?

[Vris]

Shhh....Don't tell anyone my real name!

They look solid. If Josh Fogg ever put that line up in my solo leagues, I'd be dancing in the streets! I think the offense is enough to overcome the shortcomings of the rotation (which isn't that short).

Estrada is a dependale catcher. I guess he doesn't have great ratings (like you would know anyway), but I agree that in all my leagues he doesn't really fair that well either (albeit it's a small sample size...<---fictional guy).

I don't see why they can't win the division. But Philly has a monster team as well. I think the Braves lineup has a little more pop though. If you don't mind, you think you can put up Chipper's stats for the past couple years? He must be aging gracefully by now. In a league for me, he had a great season, so I signed him for way too many years and I ended up trading him. One of the biggest decisions I've ever had to make with OOTP.

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by Vris

Shhh....Don't tell anyone my real name!

Name? Why, who the hell are you, Mr. Raccoon?

Originally Posted by Vris

They look solid. If Josh Fogg ever put that line up in my solo leagues, I'd be dancing in the streets! I think the offense is enough to overcome the shortcomings of the rotation (which isn't that short).

You make a good point, though I don't like their last two starters at all. Such is life. I don't really like Chicago's last two starters, either.

Fogg will be an interesting case. I actually agree with my dopey scout here, in that last year was a career best -- but Fogg has a rotation spot this year, guaranteed. If he walks 1.6 per nine again, how much can you say he'll really drop off, and wouldn't most of that be attributable to defense, unless he's just throwing sh*t up there and getting pounded? I don't know. Eventually, we'll find out.

Originally Posted by Vris

Estrada is a dependable catcher. I guess he doesn't have great ratings (like you would know anyway), but I agree that in all my leagues he doesn't really fair that well either (albeit it's a small sample size...<---fictional guy).

You make a good point, tangentially. Catchers are historically late bloomers -- take Paul Lo Duca or Jorge Posada for an example. Estrada is still young enough to improve plenty. If he hits even .260 this year...this offense could score 10 runs a game and not have to worry about the pitching.

Originally Posted by Vris

If you don't mind, you think you can put up Chipper's stats for the past couple years? He must be aging gracefully by now. In a league for me, he had a great season, so I signed him for way too many years and I ended up trading him. One of the biggest decisions I've ever had to make with OOTP.

Ah, now I know I have hit the big time, a stat request, and for someone not from Chicago (or Birmingham or Charlotte)! You'll be...well, not necessarily happy, that's not quite the right word, but content, at least.

YEAR	AB	AVG	OBP	SLG	R	RBI
2004	546	.293	.401	.502	110	85
2005	548	.319	.421	.473	101	81
2006	527	.292	.394	.507	95	95

Larry Wayne remains a fine player at age 34, with the decline phase looming. If he reaches 500 long balls (he's 150 away, give or take), he'd have a shot at the HOF. I'm still kicking around what I think of that.

Originally Posted by Vris

I don't see why they can't win the division. But Philly has a monster team as well. I think the Braves lineup has a little more pop though.

Ah, the perfect chance to segue. I agree, they are better than Philly, if only a bit, but the division might be tough. Why do I say that? Well...

[cknox0723]

Well, maybe this league's Eastern division was not so different from its younger brother's counterpart after all. The Metropolitans are still the back-page New York team, but only barely so. Their financial situation again gives them an advantage over the lesser lights of the division, but not so much so that their pitching should be inordinately better, yet that's just the case. It's a talented and staggeringly deep staff, evidence of such being that Jeremy Affeldt, the Royal who tortured us so last year, is pitching in middle relief despite a 3 year, $30+ million contract. Yet how is he going to crack a rotation composed of two horses in Tim Hudson and Livan Hernandez, fellow big-ticket signing Bronson Arroyo, and two cases of "OOTP's development system sucks" in Aaron Heilman (a legitimate ace!) and Jeremy Griffiths? So Affeldt will work to set up Dan Wheeler alongside Matt Mantei and Felix Rodriguez, and I just see way too many guys with ERA's in the twos and threes to expect this team to not win dozens and dozens of games.

That's without discussing the position players, who aren't the caliber of those in Atlanta or Philly, but they don't have to be. Even if Eli "Hollywood" Marrero doesn't drive in 108 runs again (but he might -- he drove in 105 in '05!), Jim Edmonds, yet another free agent pickup, will pick up the slack with his sparkling on-base skills. I wouldn't want to be on the books for his $10 million contract, but in the Apple, who cares? Jose Reyes and Kaz Matsui, who I nicknamed "Rodeo Monkey" in a past pique of wit, will provide a hacktastic, speedy, slick fielding 1-2 punch up the middle, and Jason Phillips and Matt LeCroy will provide a better post-Piazza tandem at catcher and first than will the barber shop quartet of Olivo-Torrealba-Thomas-Hillenbrand in Chicago. And D.Y.'s D.Y.'s under the bright lights in Shea now, and as long-suffering Chicago fans well know, he's a championship-caliber player. Even without a top-notch farm system (though Scott Kazmir's yet to be traded in this universe ), this club has plenty of those championship-caliber players, so it makes sense that they'll be using them to compete for championships, both this year and in the forseeable future.

[TotalEnd98]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

Catchers are historically late bloomers -- take Paul Lo Duca or Jorge Posada for an example.

Jorge Posada was not a late bloomer. He was a criminally-mismanaged catcher, who didn't get the playing time he deserved because the Yankees apparently were getting great oral sex from Joe Girardi or someone supporting him and his 650ish '97-'99 OPS.

[seth70liz76]

Originally Posted by TotalEnd98

Jorge Posada was not a late bloomer. He was a criminally-mismanaged catcher, who didn't get the playing time he deserved because the Yankees apparently were getting great oral sex from Joe Girardi or someone supporting him and his 650ish '97-'99 OPS.

Yeah, but Joe Girardi knows how to win, ummm, I mean, is a proven leader. Look at those legendary 1992 Cubs, or 1994 Rockies--where would they have been without Joe?