Oakland A's 2024 And Beyond Dynasty

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
1 June 2027
A's take first baseman Jones and reliever Byrd in the draft
By Will Theyevermakeit, weak prospects correspondent

Oakland general manager Paulie Beane selected first baseman Mark Jones (20/L/1*, projects to 2*) and right-handed relief pitcher Joe Byrd (21/R/0.5*, projects to 4.5*). Jones is a lefty power hitter who the A's scout believe will become a poor man's Matt Olson. Jaws didn't exactly drop when Beane kept with tradition and selected a reliever with his second round pick. Byrd may ultimately become a strikeout pitcher, but a diabolically bad changeup may perpetually hinder his development.

Beane was distinctly unimpressed with the draft offerings this year, even more so than usual. "Drafts in this game are always bad when you pick 30th in the first round, and especially so when you also have no compensation round picks. But this year, seeing the sheer unrelenting hopelessness throughout the pool whenever it was our turn to choose was a particular joy. I can't even remember how many picks we had, let alone what any of their names and positions are. Still, at least my minor league roster is nicely clogged with dross now."

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
5 June 2027
Injury misfortune threatens to derail Oakland's mini-recovery
By Brad Luck, unluckiness correspondent

To describe Paulie Beane's mood as thunderous would be putting it mildly. The Oakland general manager was enraged when the news came through from physio Walter Proofplasters. New recruit Brad Bradford has been ruled out for six weeks with elbow tendinitis suffered in the 2nd inning of yesterday afternoon's 7-2 win over the Baltimore Orioles. Staff working near Beane's office in the Coliseum hastily found themselves a relative to go care for or a child to pick up from school, in an effort to get out of harm's way while Beane's destructive rampage blew itself out. Thirty minutes, one smashed desk, two splintered chairs, a fatally abused coffee machine and four slaughtered pot plants later, and he was done. Club accountant Dee Loit quietly siphoned half a million dollars into the team's capital repairs fund for the remainder of the season.

Bradford has been an immediate success in the short time since his arrival on the west coast, and will be missed. Oakland have gone 4-1 during that spell, to now stand at 23-28, and Bradford himself has hit 8-16 with a home run. Jim Thompson was promoted onto the active roster in his place.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
10 June 2027
Oakland trade Stewart, Williams and Jackson for starlet Dundee
By U. Plonker, risky trades correspondent

Oakland GM Paulie Beane made a major step towards building a roster capable of maintaining a long-term trophy challenge, with the acquisition of right-handed starting pitcher Brad Dundee (24/R/3.5*, drafted 2025 rd 1 by Milwaukee) from the Brewers. Going the other way were starting pitchers Rodney Stewart and Bill Williams, plus Mr Frustrating himself, reliever Johnny Jackson. Also joining Oakland is minor league starting pitcher Ricardo O'Quinn. Williams's departure leaves Brad Bradford as clear leader in the daftest randomly generated player name competition in the A's clubhouse.

Dundee is a former first round draft pick and was BNN's #7 prospect at the start of the season. He is 7-1 with a 3.09 ERA in 11 starts for Milwaukee. He is on minimum salary for at least until the end of 2028 and Beane sees him very much as part of Oakland's long-term plans. Beane also feels Dundee's arrival has strengthened the roster for this season, as his 26-29 side look to recover from their disappointing start.

Stewart and Williams were both out of contract at the end of this season, and were unlikely to be able to negotiate renewals with the A's. Beane has clearly flipped them while they still have value, and may yet seek to reacquire one of them if they reach free agency this offseason. The 29-year-old Stewart had asked recently Beane for a lucrative extension, and reports say Beane physically shoved Stewart and his agent out of his office when they gave him their laughable demands. Williams was a useful reserve but has spent the season in the minors. Nathan Hamilton's performances this year convinced Beane that Williams was dispensable. Jackson's unerring ability to serve up dross, easy-to-smack pitches is well documented.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
24 June 2027
Dundee out with an elbow strain, Mendoza gets his chance
By L. Bowstrain, minor injuries correspondent

General manager Paulie Beane openly sipped his glass of whisky throughout yesterday's post-game press conference. Oakland had beaten Arizona 4-3 in the third game of their four-match interleague series, but it was the latest injury to a big mid-season trade arrival that had him struggling to control his feelings. Starting pitcher Brad Dundee was forced out of the game early after suffering an elbow strain, and will miss two to three months. Prospect Ramon Mendoza will take Dundee's rotation spot, while Dundee joins namesake Brad Bradford on the disabled list.

"Even Mendoza's mother would admit he had an absolute shocker when he briefly came up to the majors last season", said Beane of the 22-year-old lefty who threw for a slimy 9.49 ERA in 3 starts, showcasing his careful public nurturing of young players' confidence. "But, thanks to me trading away the better alternatives, he has earned his chance. I want him to grab it with both hands, and make me feel very bad when I send him back down again later in the season."

Beane had, until today, been in a much better mood of late. Yesterday's win moved Oakland to an even stevens 34-34 for the year, putting them 5.5 games behind surprise leaders Houston in the American League West division, and 4 games off one of Beane's hated wildcard spots. They have been unlucky, however, as their Pythagorean record is 39-29. If Oakland can continue their form of the last month or so, they will certainly bag a playoff spot of some kind by the end of the regular season.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
8 July 2027
Journeyman De Horta shuts out anaemic A's offense
By Anne Neemic, useless batting correspondent

Oakland have been on a terrific run of late. Languishing at 19-27 at one stage, they had a superb month of June to reach 43-37. But then more injuries struck, stretching GM Paulie Beane's squad depth to the limit. Brad Bradford was joined on the disabled list by two other outfielders, Martin Wilson and Jim Thompson. Dennis Hawkins at best finds playing the outfield a challenge, but has been pressed into service at his so-called optimal position of left field. Prospect Robert Perry, for so long of great potential, but still never getting the coveted Big Blue Arrow of Readiness award by minor league manager Ron Washington-Deecy, has been called up for emergency outfield backup duty.

As if that wasn't bad enough, yesterday in the rubber game of their series with San Diego, Oakland then ran into the irresistible force that is career pitching medicrity Adrian De Horta. The 32-year-old righty, with a 4.56 career ERA and 5.51 mark so far this season, found the A's lineup in generous mood. Oakland's boys swung and missed at anything that moved, and shortstop Josh Morgan's single was their one solitary baserunner in the entire game, as they were beaten 3-0. By the end, De Horta could have pitched a space hopper towards them and they still wouldn't have made contact.

Field manager Phil D'Manager was visibly sobbing in the dugout at one point in proceedings. He was presumably expecting to be torn to shreds by Beane later. Their relationship has remained rocky despite the A's recovery, and it is rumoured the two are no longer on speaking terms.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
19 July 2027
First all-star game call-ups for Dickson, Gusman, Hawkins and Cruz
By Y. Bother, pointless game correspondent

Five Oakland A's players have been selected to the 2027 all-star game. Pitcher Ambrose Bailey received his second call-up, just reward for his 2.77 ERA in the first half of the season. And there were first selections for four other players. Karl Dickson has fallen away a little after a superb first few starts, but still made the American League roster. There were also three Oakland batters who got the call: second baseman Alejandro Gusman, left fielder Dennis Hawkins, and muscleman outfielder Javier Cruz.

Cruz has been awesome all year. Oakland fans are unused to watching many balls sailing into the green seats of the Coliseum. Well, hit by A's batters at least. So at times this year they have hardly believed what they've seen. Cruz has crushed 25 homers already, and, barring injury, will smash the franchise season record of 33 set in 2021 by former catcher Devon Fisher. Paulie Beane, Oakland's general manager, has apparently already resigned himself to the fact that if Cruz carries on in this fashion, he will command a salary well out of the club's reach by the time he reaches free agency. Gusman's case for a call-up was aided by the sensational progress he has made defensively at second base, and he has now become genuinely average. Beane commented about his fielding, "It turns out you can polish a turd."

He may have five World Series rings, but the all-star rosters proved that Beane by no means gets all his decisions right. Three relievers he has in the past chosen to let go, Jose Ceguera, now at Tampa Bay, Roland Mathis of the Chicago Cubs, and Atlanta's Franyel Casadilla, all made the rosters. Beane said, "Congrats to those guys, it's terrific to see how well they've done since their time here with us. I probably shouldn't have traded them, but am I bothered now? All I'll say is, five World Series rings. So, no."

His Oakland side will now look to push on from their current 48-43 position. That's good enough for second place in the AL West division, and the second wildcard spot. Divisional leaders Houston sit only 3 games ahead, so the A's are still very much in the race.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
5 August 2027
Hamilton's 2-hit shutout cements place in Oakland's rotation
By Noah Runs-Allowed, shutouts correspondent

Starter Nathan Hamilton very definitely locked down his place in the Oakland rotation last night, after throwing a sublime 2-hit shutout in the A's 8-0 win over the San Francisco Giants in the latest Bay Bridge Series. The 23-year-old Hamilton fanned 6 and allowed just 2 walks in a comfortable win for Paulie Beane's side, a victory which was assured when the lineup smashed 7 runs in the 6th inning, with outfielders Eddie Holland and Brad Bradford both walloping home runs.

Although Jose Fernandez is expected to leave the club when his contract expires at the end of this season, Hamilton's emergence means on any normal club the young rotation would, barring injury, probably now be in place for several years. Karl Dickson, 25, and Ambrose Bailey, 29, are already all-stars. 24-year-old Brad Dundee is still injured but will be back. And young lefty Ramon Mendoza, 22, is making the most of his chance in the big leagues, posting a 3.16 ERA from 7 starts since being called up. But this is a cheapskate club, not a normal club. Fernandez's $22.4m salary will come off the books and give some salary room, but will Beane be able to afford to keep this quality quintet beyond the next couple of years, once Hamilton, Dundee and Mendoza reach arbitration? If not, Beane will be banging on owner Ban-ki Rupt's door, demanding a higher payroll budget. But he's unlikely to get anyway with such an appeal. As he has numerous times in the past, he may have to fortify himself with a couple of whiskies, before picking up the phone and trading away an excellent player.

Oakland have been in electric form of late. They have gone 14-5 over their last 19 games, and, while the equally in-form Houston Astros remain 3 games ahead in the American League West, the A's are now 57-45 and it is firmly a two-way battle. The A's also lead the wildcard race, and hold a 3.5 game lead over the team who are third in that race, the usually awful Kansas City Royals.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
24 August 2027
Pummellings by Toronto leave Oakland with it all to do
By Lou Sing-Ground, bad run correspondent

The 76-41 Toronto Blue Jays have the best record in baseball, and their performances against the Oakland A's this past fortnight have shown why. In the teams' two head-to-head series, the A's have been clipped six games to one, with their only victory coming in the final match, last night's 10-4 win at Rogers Center.

Those two series batterings by the Blue Jays have seen Oakland, who stand at 66-54, lose ground to the Houston Astros in the American League West division. The 73-46 Astros now have a commanding 7.5 game lead. Oakland, however, are still clinging desperately onto the second wildcard spot, and have a 3 game lead over chasing Kansas City. Speaking after yesterday's game, general manager Paulie Beane was not exactly a picture of joy unconfined at the prospect of facing the fifth wildcard lottery draw of his tenure. "Unless Houston hit a bad spell, it will be difficult to catch them now, but we'll keep fighting to the very last game", he said in cliched fashion. Asked about the wildcard, he said, "Obviously I hate the fixture. And only marginally less so when we win the damn game."

Oakland's bats have been a bit quiet of late, notwithstanding being stymied by the Blue Jays. Babe magnet Javier Cruz now has 31 home runs, just 2 short of the single season franchise record with two months still to play. Third baseman Patick Snel was dropped down the lineup by Beane after a slow start to the season but has recovered well and is now batting third. Beane's biggest concern is centre fielder Eddie Holland, who has been demoted from the lead-off spot after a steady but utterly unspectacular season so far. He has a .324 OBP but the 29-year-old's overall offensive production has now fallen in each of the last two years. With two years remaining on a $16m per annum contract, Beane and owner Ban-ki Rupt will be desperately hoping this isn't a steep and terminal decline, and a contract about to go bad.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
6 September 2027
Starlet Morris gets his chance as lothario Holland is ruled out for the season
By Johnny Rubber, casual relationships correspondent

Oakland general manager Paulie Beane has promoted to the active roster his latest outfield prospect, 24-year-old corner outfielder William Morris, after centre fielder Eddie Holland was ruled out for the season following yesterday's 7-6 win over Colorado. Morris was originally drafted by Texas in 2021 and joined the A's from Tampa Bay in November 2024 as part of the trade that saw current catcher Jakson Reetz arrive and former catcher Devon Fisher depart.

Morris is a left-handed power hitter very much in the image of Javier Cruz. The similarity unfortunately does not extend to defense, where Morris manages somehow to be even more inept. If he develops as scouts expect, he and Cruz could form a potent nice-slugging-with-not-nice-defense partnership in the middle of the A's lineup in years to come. Holland came out of yesterday's game with a strained groin in the 4th inning. Rumours quickly surfaced that Holland, a well known, shall we say, swordsman, had actually sustained the injury during extra-curricular activities the night prior to the game. A source told the Telegraph (translation: we've probably made this up), "Eddie turned up to the game looking tired, and we did wander if he had perhaps lived up to his reputation after hitting Denver's nightspots and not getting as much sleep as he ought. It's fortunate for him that we are on a road trip, or else Paulie Beane would have his guts for garters." Another insider told us that Beane would very much have Holland's guts for garters the moment he got back to the west coast.

Oakland have done their best to give other sides a shot at the postseason through being frustratingly inconsistent over the last few weeks. But the other contenders have been equally as generous in return, and, after yesterday's win completed a 3-0 sweep over the Rockies, Oakland stand at 71-60, second in the American League West and still in a wildcard spot. Division leaders Houston have just hit a dire slump, and Oakland have closed to six games behind. Can the A's overcome the odds and yet grab another divisional title?

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
7 September 2027
Morris homers in first major league plate appearance
By Homer Sareasy, young sluggers correspondent

Oakland slugging outfielder William Morris last night matched the feat of his colleague Javier Cruz a year ago by larroping a home run on his first major league plate appearance. Batting in the eight spot, he smoked Seattle starter Jose Gonzales into the Coliseum seats in the 3rd inning. He also hit a double next time he was up.

Unfortunately Morris's time in the lineup may be limited thanks to his team mates. Oakland lost the game 4-3 in extra innings, but would have won in regulation had it not been for an unearned run scored by the Mariners after an error by Brad Bradford. Bradford has been given the centre field role by Paulie Beane, the A's GM, after Eddie Holland's injury. However, if he carries on like this he won't have the role for long. Beane's response could be to instead move Martin Wilson into that vital defensive position, shift Bradford to left field and leave Morris out of the team. Morris said to reporters after the game, "It was a great day overall. I showed today I can slug a ball pretty hard, and I'll show Brad Bradford I can slug him pretty hard too, if his muppetry causes me to be dropped later on."

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
20 September 2027
A's prepare for run-in with 6-0 week
By Homer Stretch, late season correspondent

Oakland GM Paulie Beane declared himself satisfied with his team's performance over the last week, noting that "I haven't been forced to smash any office furniture for a while, and have only drunk one bottle of whisky this week." His world champions yesterday completed a 6-0 week during which they swept divisional rivals Los Angeles Angels and division leaders Houston, outscoring their opponents 46-19 in the process. The A's now stand at 79-64, just four games behind the Astros in the hunt for the American League West title. They look odds on to claim a wildcard spot at a minimum, as they hold a 7.5 game advantage over Kansas City, the leading chasers. It is equally odds on that, should they make what is Beane's favourite fixture of the year, they would face Tampa Bay. The Rays are marooned 11.5 games behind Toronto in the American League East division, but comfortably 9.5 games clear of the Royals in the wildcard race.

Oakland fans are, however, increasingly concerned about the loose performances of all-star closer Eric Wright. Wright - dubbed "Eric Wrong" by A's supporters with a keen sense of humour - has earned 36 saves from 41 opportunities this season. But he seems to be on a one man mission to demonstrate what a misleading statistic the save is. He is leaking runs like a sieve, and has posted a 4.39 ERA and a 4.09 FIP. That said, his fundamentals are good: he has marks of 2.3 BB/9, 9.4 K/9 and 4.1 K/BB. His BABIP is an even .297. Even the finest sabermetric brains are divided over whether Wrong has been any good this season. Renowned sabermetrician James Bill said, "I haven't a clue. All I do know is that the people who run baseball teams are fools." Beane has simply instructed field manager Phil D'Manager to leave Wrong in the closer role. It helps that, in a bullpen with an overall ERA north of 4.10, no one else has been much cop either. Beane denied he has reverted to the "selling the closer" strategy of his predecessor.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
4 October 2027
Tense final week beckons as A's hunt down Astros
By Ting Mynails, final week correspondent

When Oakland were 19-27 and 12.5 games back in the American League West division at the end of May, no one gave them a hope of achieving a fifth consecutive world championship. Eternal optimist Paulie Beane certainly didn't. Nor did the local bookies, who, apparently oblivious to the team's performances over the last four years, were at that point offering odds of 50-1 or more against an A's World Series win, which fans gladly took up in droves. But now, with just one week and six games to go in the regular season, the Bay Area's bookmaking community is staring down the barrel of prospective financial armageddon, and hoping against hope that Oakland do not continue their recent form. For not only have the 88-68 A's now guaranteed themselves a wildcard berth, but they have closed to just two games back from long-time division pacesetters Houston.

It has been a fantastic turnaround for Beane's boys. Rumours, denied by the club, abound that several members of Oakland's bullpen have shares in Californian bookmakers, given their apparent urgent desire to chuck games away. But there have been excellent seasons from the rotation, Karl Dickson leading the way with a 16-6 record and 2.94 ERA. And the batters have been uncharacteristically productive, including second baseman Alejandro Gusman's .373 wOBA, Javier Cruz's 39 home runs, and Dennis Hawkins's 115 RBIs. Two wins this week would give them a sixth straight season of 90 or more wins.

Can the A's complete a superb reversal and pip the Astros to the divisional title right at the last minute? Will Seattle and Texas, who the A's face in these final games, spoil their party? And will we keep asking hypothetical questions rather than reporting actual news?

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
11 October 2027
Oakland forced to settle for the wildcard game, will meet Tampa Bay
By O. Nonotagain, wildcard game correspondent

So, it'll be the fifth wildcard game of his managerial career for Paulie Beane. He'll be so chuffed. Oakland put up a valiant fight during the final week of the regular season, going 4-2 to finish on 92-70, but a 3-3 week for the Astros was enough to see them to the American League West title by a single game. Oakland will now face Tampa Bay in the wildcard match-up. Quite when that will take place is not yet clear, as the National League has four teams - Atlanta, Miami, Milwaukee and San Diego - tied at 83-79 for the second wildcard spot. God only knows how the league will sort that one out. Some tremendously unfair way, presumably.

The week started off in disastrous fashion for Oakland. In their first game at Seattle, the A's broke a 2-2 tie with two runs in the top of the 9th inning. Victory was assured, right? Unfortunately, not right. Eric Wright, to be precise. The sobbing from Beane, and the cheers of jubilation from Bay Area bookmakers, reverberated around the city as, gathered round their television sets, they watched Eric Wrong give up 3 runs in the bottom of the inning to hand the A's the loss. It was Wright's seventh blown save of the year. Beane said afterwards that young lefty Jose Duran will take over closer duties for what remains of Oakland's season. And it got worse for the A's when, after the game, Alejandro Gusman was diagnosed with a hamstring strain by physio Walter Proofplasters, and won't play again this season. Forgotten man Rich Weaver came up to the active roster as an infield backup, with Ketel Marte shuffling up the pecking order to be starting second baseman.

That Seattle loss proved to be crucial in the end. The week also saw contrasting performances from the Oakland rotation. Nathan Hamilton added to his growing reputation with a magical 2-hit shutout as the A's won the rubber game of the Seattle series 10-0. Meanwhile, on the season's final day against Texas, Ambrose Bailey wangled himself out of the tiresome burden of pitching in the starting rotation in the postseason if the A's make it past the wildcard game, by bending over and getting his backside spanked for 8 runs in the 1st inning while retiring only two Rangers batters. He somehow managed to avoid taking the loss after a magnificent comeback from the A's offense saw them pinch a 13-12 win in the 9th.

So, it's the wildcard game for Oakland. Beane is 2-2 in the fixture in his career to date. What will happen this time? And from now on, will we always conclude our articles with a couple of hanging questions?

The final playoff picture is as follows.

American League
AL East winners: Toronto (106-56)
AL Central winners: Cleveland (93-69)
AL West winners: Houston (93-69)
Wild cards: Oakland (92-70), Tampa Bay (88-74)

National League
NL East winners: Philadelphia (85-77)
NL Central winners: Chicago Cubs (97-65)
NL West winners: San Francisco (95-67)
Wild cards: LA Dodgers (86-76), one of Atlanta, Miami, Mikwaukee, San Diego (all 83-79)

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
12 October 2027
Controversy over National League wildcard tiebreaker; Milwaukee and San Diego cry foul
By W. T. Eff, disbelief correspondent

MLB commissioner Rob Manfred-Mann last night faced calls for his resignation after the farcical resolution of the four-way tie for the second National League wildcard spot. Four teams, Atlanta, Miami, Milwaukee and San Diego, all finished the regular season tied at 83-79. Manfred-Mann's decision was to play a single tiebreaker game between Atlanta and Miami. The Braves won 6-3 and officially progress to meet the Dodgers in the wildcard game. Milwaukee and San Diego were eliminated, apparently on alphabetical order.

Upon hearing the news about the tiebreaker arrangements, Milwaukee and San Diego, with considerable justification, complained vigorously about "scandalous alphabetical prejudice and discrimination" on the league's part. Atlanta expressed their support for Manfred-Mann's decision, saying "Just name your city something beginning with 'A' - problem solved". Manfred-Mann cited "the need to complete the fixture calendar before the non-existent winter arrives in this fictional league" and "the difficulties in coding anything more complex on the handheld devices we use in the MLB head office" for adopting such a childishly simplistic approach. He vigorously denied rumours that controversial former commissioner Dub Giles offered him any advice in reaching his decision. "Even he wouldn't have done something this daft", he is reported to have said privately.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
14 October 2027
Dickson brilliance leads A's to victory in tense but unexhilarating wildcard game
By Dan Rather-Boring, low scoring games correspondent

I don't believe it. Paulie Beane's Oakland A's are on a postseason march yet again. The team that, at the end of May, was 19-27 and apparently sinking fast, is now through to the American League divisional series after beating Tampa Bay 1-0 in last night's wildcard game at the Coliseum. The A's may be the four-time defending world champions, but they will have it all to do to overcome the 106-win Toronto Blue Jays in the next round.

In a game that was somehow incredibly exciting yet deathly dull at the same time, the A's were led to the win by in-form ace Karl Dickson, who threw 8 peerless, scoreless, remorseless innings, restricting the Rays to just two hits and one walk. The Rays had shrewdly selected lefty Robert Hayes to start the game, in an effort to stifle the A's offense by meaning that Beane's platooned lefty hitters Javier Cruz, Matt Olson, Patrick Snel and William Morris were kept on the bench. And it worked. But they reckoned without Dickson.

After seven scoreless innings apiece, the A's finally roused the crowd from its stupor and opened the scoring in the bottom of the 8th. Second baseman Rich Weaver opened the inning with a lead off double. Field manager Phil D'Manager put Snel in to pinch run for him, and Snel was advanced to third on designated hitter Dylan Johnston's single. Shortstop Josh Morgan then batted Snel home to score the game's only run. The smile on Paulie Beane's face could reportedly be seen from space as his newly installed closer, Jose Duran, delivered a 1-2-3 top of the 9th to seal the win. The laxadaisical lineups managed just six hits between them all night. Tumbleweed rolled across the outfield on several occasions during the game.

Meanwhile, the National League tiebreaker scandal continues to rumble on, as beneficiaries Atlanta strolled past the LA Dodgers in the NL wildcard game. If they win the World Series, commissioner Rob Manfred-Mann, already under considerable pressure, would surely be in an untenable position.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
18 October 2027
Brave Oakland's championship run finally ends as Toronto prove too strong
By Noah Contest, mismatches correspondent

Oakland's run of successive World Series victories has finally come to an end as they were unceremoniously dumped out of the postseason after a 3-0 divisional series dismantling by the impressive Toronto Blue Jays. In a series of one-sided games, Oakland lost 5-0, 11-1 and 8-3 to a Toronto side who feasted on the A's usually strong pitching and kept their lineup quiet. Bookmakers in the Oakland region breathed a collective sigh of relief at the news that their livelihoods were no longer under threat from the multi-million dollar pay-outs they would have had to make had the A's won yet another world championship. After that close call with extinction, the days of them offering stupidly large odds on the A's are over. Maybe.

General manager Paulie Beane was in surprisingly philosophical mood after yesterday's final game. "You can't win them all", he said with an unusual sense of perspective. "Don't get me wrong, I'm decidedly narked about this. But my accountant Dee Loit tells me we've used up all our capital maintenance budget for the year. Somehow we seem to have got through a lot of furniture here in the front office this season. Shoddy workmanship, I say. But in any case, Dee says that if I lose my temper and break anything else I'll literally have nothing to sit down on. So I'm trying to keep as calm as possible, despite my disappointment", he said through clenched teeth as he squeezed furiously on a stress ball.

Beane now has the remainder of the postseason to decide what to do about the expiring contracts of pitching legend Jose Fernandez and shortstop Josh Morgan. Both players are alleged by those in the know to want what Beane considers to be unrealistic salaries and lengths of contracts for their age, so free agency looks imminent for the pair. Beane is reportedly hopeful of agreeing a one-year extension with veteran infield backup Ketel Marte, who is now keen to stay at the Coliseum after regaining second base duties when Alejandro Gusman got injured a few weeks ago.

MLB commissioner Rob Manfred-Mann is expected to remain in his post after Atlanta, the beneficiaries of the wildcardgate scandal, were eliminated by the Chicago Cubs in the National League divisional series.

[Paulie123]

The Oakland Telegraph
10 November 2027
Wait goes on for Cubs as Indians take World Series crown
By Indy Ans, Cleveland correspondent

Cleveland fans celebrated last night as their team claimed the 2027 World Series title with a 4-2 series win over the Chicago Cubs. It is their second title of what is being dubbed the Dynastic Era of Baseball, the period since 2015. They won previously in 2016. Cleveland fully deserved their victory after overcoming the heavily fancied Toronto Blue Jays in the American League championship series. For the Chicago Cubs, the wait for the elusive world championship continues. It is their second loss in the fall classic of the Dynastic Era, after they also lost to Minnesota in 2021.

In Oakland, general manager Paulie Beane said, "The Indians let my predecessor poach Peter Brand off them over 25 years ago, which helped set up all our club's success. That was a calamitous setback for them, so well done to them for getting back to the top of the game." He confirmed that outfielder Jim Thompson and infielder Ketel Marte has agreed new one-year contracts with the A's for 2027 at $2.8m and $1.0m respectively. The versatile and defensively strong players will provide good backup support. Beane also said that club legend Jose Fernandez and shortstop Josh Morgan would become free agents after they were unable to agree terms on extensions. "Morgan is about to turn 32 but wants 5 years at in excess of $14m per year. Good luck with that, mate. If you can find some fool GM willing to pay you that, well, good luck to them too, they'll need it", Beane said.

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The Oakland Telegraph
2 December 2027
Jose Fernandez: A tribute
By Jose I. Loveyou, pitching legends correspondent

Oakland GM Paulie Beane admitted he had tears in his eyes and gave his iPad a little hug as the departure to free agency of club legend Jose Fernandez was confirmed yesterday. Both club and player wanted their association to continue, but they could not agree a financial package to suit both parties. Fernandez may be old, wrinkly and senile these days, with a fastball rated by coaches as less threatening than the average high school pitcher's, and that comes at batters so slowly they could do a lap of the bases and still get back to home plate in time to swing at it, but it was fitting that he has remained surprisingly effective to the end. In his final season at the Coliseum, he still went 16-10 with a 3.62 ERA.

His seven-and-a-half year career on the west coast has been nothing short of stellar. Four World Series rings, in 2023, 2024, 2025 and 2026. Four American League Cy Young Awards, in 2022, 2023, 2024 and 2026, to add to his National League one in 2018 at previous club Miami. Four all-star call-ups, in these same years, in addition to three previous selections with the Marlins. Three seasons leading the entire league in wins: 2020, 2022 and 2024. Three seasons as MLB's ERA leader, in 2022, 2024 and 2026. A perfect game, against Tampa Bay in June 2023. And he was a true workhorse, never pitching fewer than 219 innings in any of his whole seasons for Oakland.

Fernandez joined the A's from Miami in June 2020 in a trade that even the most die-hard of Marlins fans would concede was ever so slightly won by Oakland. All-star pitcher Denny Miller, just a prospect at the time, moved westwards with him. Ageing and impending free agents Sonny Gray and Sean Doolittle, plus utterly hapless hitter Billy Burns, went the other way. Beane had been looking to land a proper ace to top his rotation for several years beforehand. Gray, Jeff Samardzija, Robert Stephenson, Michael Wacha and Tyler Skaggs had all been tried but not really delivered the goods. With Fernandez, Beane finally got his man.

Fernandez started all but one of his 254 games for the A's. He never even came close to posting a losing win-loss record in any year, finishing with a 137-56 record for the club. Twice he posted annual ERAs in the 2.50s. He may be just a set of numbers in a computer game but he will be missed. He is a legend. From all at the Telegraph, we say, thank you Jose, for all the wonderful memories.

An emotional Beane told reporters, "OK, he's gone. Forgotten his name already. Jose who? Let's move on." Karl Dickson is the man attempting to fill Fernandez's boots as the team's resident pitching ace. If he does even half as well, the fans in the Coliseum will adore him.