Portland Raccoons (ABL)

[Westheim]

Perhaps understandably, the Raccoons calmed down a bit after the winter meetings, dosh being spent and all, although we still crept after a few veteran pitchers™ that would totally not ruin the entire show come April. We were trying to get some valid arms on the cheap without entirely descending down the dented cans aisle…

There were not a lot of savvy trades to swing with some of the sizable contracts behind the expensive three. Nobody was really into J.P. Gallo after his meh season, and then we had $7.7M in total bound up in Jose Corral and Carlos Fumero, both of whom figured to be in different platoons. Neither of these players attracted any interesting offers when dangled throughout December.

+++

December 20 – The Buffaloes acquire former Warriors CL Cody Kleidon (49-64, 3.23 ERA, 362 SV) on a $6.2M contract for 2070.
December 24 – The Raccoons announce the addition of former Buffaloes SP Ian Lowry (49-89, 4.56 ERA), the 29-year-old getting a $700k contract.
December 25 – The Loggers sign former Rebs SS Casey Ramsey (.297, 107 HR, 833 RBI) to a $2.48M contract for the 2070 season.
December 27 – The Thunder get 2-time World Series champion and reigning FL Pitcher of the Year, ex-Cyclones SP Jose Aguilar (64-34, 3.24 ERA) on a 6-year, $50.6M contract.
January 5 – The Stars land ex-RIC SP Bobby Marceau (70-56, 3.49 ERA) on a 5-yr, $37.3M deal for the 32-year-old.
January 5 – The Raccoons add veteran right-handed MR Victor Ramirez (52-55, 4.27 ERA, 35 SV), who signed for $900k just a week shy of his 38th birthday. Ramirez will be on his seventh team in seven years, the most recent being the Loggers.
January 6 – The Loggers send 3B/SS Rafael Murcia (.261, 17 HR, 163 RBI) to the Bayhawks for OF John Parrish (.240, 32 HR, 154 RBI). The Bayhawks also receive a prospect.

+++

Okay, I said no dented cans, and I don’t think that Lowry is a dented can. He has NEVER pitched for a good team. He’s been on a WINNING team exactly ONCE. His control is an issue, but he can live off the defense by getting consistent groundballs, and maybe then he’ll put a 4-ish ERA together. I wouldn’t go as far as hoping for a winning record… But he makes a decent enough #5 until we can see where Val Centeno is, which means for at least three months.

Ramirez was completely betrayed by defense for two years in a row, and I am sure that he can be better. I mean, he was on the Loggers last year. Every game against the Loggers went like 10-8.

In all the excitement of the last weeks we totally forgot that there is a HOF vote going on.

Other Coons with new deals: Wally Leggett got $530k from the Indians; aaaand that’s it right now.

+++

I'm home from tomorrow and for the next two weeks until January 4 or 6 (depends a bit on whether other people in the office get their **** together on when I go back) - anyway, we'll wrap up the offseason the next few days, and once I'm back from the inevitable food coma around the 25th/26th, we'll get the season going and get the Critters churning!

[Westheim]

January 8 – The Canadiens trade OF Tyler Chenette (.290, 28 HR, 192 RBI) to the Capitals for OF/1B Jose Alvarez (.273, 36 HR, 287 RBI).
January 10 – The Crusaders sign up former Loggers INF Kyle Reber (.281, 35 HR, 505 RBI) for three years and $11.76M.
January 10 – The Warriors trade 28-year-old 1B Jerry Morejon (.277, 81 HR, 358 RBI) to the Raccoons for 25-yr old SP/MR Cameron Bridges (1-1, 4.66 ERA) and 26-yr old INF Gary Gates (.240, 0 HR, 28 RBI).
January 28 – Pittsburgh signs ex-SAC SP Jay Williams (78-88, 4.14 ERA) to a 2-year deal that will pay $14.6M to the 31-year-old right-hander.
January 31 – The Raccoons trade AAA SP/MR Randy Rautenstrauch (18-16, 4.72 ERA) to the Rebels for right-hander Javy Carpio (17-13, 3.89 ERA, 5 SV).
February 1 – Former NAS SP Tomas Restrepo (55-40, 3.67 ERA) inks with Denver for $7.76M over two years.
February 1 – Veteran left-hander Elijah LaBat (45-53, 3.55 ERA, 128 SV), most recently with the Knights, lands a 2-yr, $6.08M deal with the Canadiens.
February 3 – The Indians sign ex-POR SP Girolamo Pizzichini (57-68, 4.37 ERA, 1 SV) to an $810k contract for 2070, which means the Raccoons receive a supplemental round pick as compensation.
February 8 – Dallas announces that a 5-year, $15.44M contract has been signed with former Canadiens catcher Steve Varner (.267, 64 HR, 373 RBI).
February 9 – The Thunder sign former Miners SP Chris Hale (69-68, 3.89 ERA) to a $19.5M contract over three years.

+++

The Warriors came up with the Morejon offer and wanted Bridges and Noah Newhard, and I told them no. For some reason they really wanted to get rid of Morejon, though. Bridges has been weighed and found too light by us, and I was out of patience with Gates (81 AB for zero RBI last year). The person most unhappy about this deal was probably Dan Gomez, because his roster spot just disappeared. Morejon was cheap, in a contract year, and didn’t look like trouble from the get-go.

Getting rid of Rated-R was still on the bucket list for this winter and with Carpio we got another one of those “oh maybe he can start in a pinch” pitchers that can’t start. His dead straight lazy 91mph fastball is gonna play GREAT in Portland. Tony Gaytan better hustle to keep giving up more homers per inning than this guy.

We were already $1M overbudget at this point, so further additions were categorically out of the question unless somebody was made enough to take on J.P. Gallo’s contract. The offseason was over for the Coons and now it was time to hammer whatever we had accumulated into a roster that wouldn’t fall apart the second they touched down in Elk City, where the 2070 season would begin for this team.

All type-A free agents have signed by this stage, and the Raccoons’ compensation for Joel Starr remains the lowest forfeited pick of the winter. Whee!

Critters of the past with new futures included Jaden Wilson signing an odd 4-yr, $4.4M contract with the Buffos; Ramon Carreno got $620k from the Loggers; the Thunder gave $780k to Jim White;

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2070 HALL OF FAME VOTING

The Hall of Fame would welcome two new members in 2070, these having emerged from the recently completed voting process.

With the Alex Vasquez, one of the foremost examples of a get-on-base, steal your way around players of the last decades was elected. Vasquez played 17 seasons for the Miners and a couple more years with the Knights at the end, leading the FL in stolen bases in each of his first seven seasons. His 669 career stolen bases still have him seventh on the all-time leaderboard. Apart from that he led the league in OBP twice and collected three Gold Gloves and four Platinum Sticks in middle infield positions through his career. Power was never the Dominican left-hander’s game – he never hit more than five homers in a season and more than 30 doubles just once. But his constant on-base presence and ten seasons with 100+ walks had him on the bags constantly to harass the opposition. For his career he batted .292/.404/.360 with 2,605 hits, 1,640 walks, 37 homers, and 779 RBI.

While Indy’s Bill Quinteros was more of a slugger and had 17 consecutive seasons with double digit home runs for the Indians before a few more journeyman stops at the end, the corner outfielder actually never led the league in home runs – but in his second season in 2044 hit 17 triples to lead the league in that category. He also topped the CL in OBP twice. Not much of a defender, he made his value with the stick, getting up to 58 extra-base hits in a season, and racked up six Platinum Sticks along with nine All Star nominations. While he hit .300 or better four times in his career, towards the end he posted low averages, but the knack for a near-.400 OBP remained with him all the way til the end of his 20-year career. Quinteros retired a .268/.398/.437 hitter with 2,381 hits, 326 homers, and 1,261 RBI. He also stole 217 bases in his younger years and drew 1,739 walks.

Quinteros is also the first player with a surname starting with Q in the Hall. Someone make room between Gary Perrone and Andrés Ramirez!

Full voting results:

PIT 2B Alex Vasquez – 1st – 82.9 – INDUCTED
IND RF Bill Quinteros – 3rd – 76.2 – INDUCTED
??? LF Eddie Moreno – 7th – 71.4
POR SS Lorenzo Lavorano – 2nd – 63.1
CHA RF Danny Ceballos – 1st – 28.2
DEN 3B Ronnie Thompson – 9th – 22.2
NAS C Jose Cantu – 1st – 16.7
??? CL Jason Posey – 1st – 13.9
IND CL Tommy Gardner – 2nd – 13.5
??? CL Ben Lussier – 1st – 13.1
LAP RF Matt Diskin – 4th – 11.9
IND LF Danny Rivera – 7th – 11.9
DEN MR Kellen Lanning – 3rd – 9.5
ATL CF Jon Alade – 1st – 9.5
??? SP Matt Sealock – 10th – 9.5 – DROPPED
??? SS Julio Moriel – 2nd – 9.1
WAS LF Dan Martin – 1st – 7.9
??? SS Alex Adame – 6th – 6.3
??? CL Mike Lynn – 7th – 6.0
SAC SS Chris Navarro – 3rd – 5.6
PIT LF Josh Abercrombie – 1st – 5.2
??? SP Kyle Turay – 2nd – 4.4 – DROPPED
??? CL Kevin Hitchcock – 1st – 4.0 – DROPPED
DAL LF Omar Gonzalez – 4th – 4.0 – DROPPED
??? SS Rick Price – 3rd – 3.6 – DROPPED
SFB SP Milt Cantrell – 1st – 3.2 – DROPPED
??? SP David Concha – 1st – 2.0 – DROPPED
OCT 1B David Worthington – 2nd – 1.6 – DROPPED
??? CL Willie Cruz – 1st – 0.8 – DROPPED

Lonzo is still the career stolen base leader… but Omar Sanchez, age 40, tied him with five steals between the Stars and Scorpions last season. Whether another team will be bold enough to invest in Sanchez’ old and aching body, remains to be seen, but right now they are jointly atop the leaderboard with 752 steals each.

[Westheim]

February 22 – The Cyclones trade CF/LF Matt Little (.268, 65 HR, 310 RBI) to the Stars. The departure of the 27-year-old outfielder nets them two prospects.
March 2 – The Canadiens send OF/1B Rick Atkins (.287, 82 HR, 490 RBI) to the Rebs for LF/CF Jeff Hawkins (.295, 6 HR, 50 RBI) and the #10 prospect in the league, CL Alex Tabares.
March 15 – The Warriors find a way to spend $30.3M in March, signing ex-PIT SP Jesus Ordonez (42-47, 4.06 ERA) to a 5-year deal.
March 31 – Sacramento signs ex-Condors OF/2B/SS Mike Pinault (.223, 71 HR, 341 RBI) to a 2-year, $4.32M contract.
March 31 – The Scorpions also get MR Leo Garcia (4-2, 4.05 ERA, 2 SV) and a prospect from the Aces in exchange for 2B/SS Carlos Cervantez (.261, 20 HR, 151 RBI).
April 3 – The Titans ship C Jonathan Gutierrez (.280, 100 HR, 447 RBI) to the Miners, along with a prospect, for the service of SP Adam McDonald (53-64, 4.15 ERA).

+++

I was entirely busy trying to balance the budget in the last weeks. Nobody wanted to flick a backup infielder for one of our superfluous and useless right-handed relievers, so there was nothing else to do really. When you’re broke, you’re broke. And your rotation is gonna consist of five bodies and at least as many rolls of duct tape.

There was one thing that we did for the future, and that was signing a 4-year, $6.5M contract with Tony Gaytan that would take out his last two years of team control at $1M and $1.5M, and then two years of free agency for $2M. It looked like a low-risk gamble, since he was not likely to lose his fine control at 27, and in the meantime, enjoy the fireworks. Yes, it’s Crusaders and damn Elks and everybody and their mother hitting their homers, but your kid’s four, he doesn’t know the difference. Make a brave face.

And if **** does hit the catapult, then we’ll have the most expensive mop-up pitcher in the league. (shrugs!)

But the Coons have won the division ONCE in the last 14 years, and were within single digits of the winner only four other times… maybe stop looking for perfect, and go more for “that’ll do”. Also, mind the 5-year window with this lineup.

The longest stretch with only one playoff appearance for the Raccoons, by the way, was 20 seasons from 1997 to 2016. Only the 2010 Coons got there (and didn’t win a ring either). In that whole stretch, we also only had four other seasons where we were at least within single digits of first place (all clustered from 2007 to 2012, except 2008).

Apart from that we only signed up a random Cuban left-hander, David Delgado, who had four pitches but no stamina, and stuck the 23-year-old in Ham Lake, and you’ll never hear from him again.

Former Raccoons that found a new home in this time included Pedro Mendoza, signing with the Thunder for $570k; Juan Sanchez was taken in by the Stars for $600k; Lorenzo Marquez joined the Knights for $590k; Atlanta also added Angel Alba for $620k; Trent Brassfield got on the Blue Sox for $660k; Evan Alvey then also joined the Knights for two years and $1.65M; Dave Blackshire (age 42!) signed with the Stars for $600k; the Knights kept bringing them in, signing Rafael Valencia for $530k; Diego Mendoza landed with the Loggers for $620k;

[Westheim]

2070 PORTLAND RACCOONS – Opening Day Roster (first set in parenthesis shows 2069 stats, second set career stats; players with an * are off season acquisitions;

SP Nick Walla, 29, B:R, T:R (11-18, 3.80 ERA | 55-62, 3.50 ERA) – Walla has five good pitches, and came close to an ERA title in 2068 before a late fade derailed the campaign, and he would be even better if he had a wipeout pitch in his arsenal. Too many homers allowed (though not remotely close to Gaytan), and last year he couldn’t buy himself a run if he needed one, so he came pretty close to leading the league in losses. He’s signed to a long, team-friendly deal so he better abandon all hope now.
SP Vinny Morales, 28, B:S, T:R (10-9, 3.92 ERA | 19-19, 3.78 ERA) – returned from the list of busted prospects as a midseason replacement in 2068 and suddenly managed to pitch competently at the major league level, even though his strikeouts were rather few and far between. Good control, but tends to give up dingers and doesn’t have a lot of stamina.
SP Tony Gaytan, 26, B:R, T:R (11-16, 3.99 ERA | 33-50, 4.17 ERA) – “Bombs Away!” Gaytan gave up almost as many homers (36) as walks (38) in 2069, which is already almost all that you need to know about him. We also signed him to a cheap 4-year deal just a month earlier, so that act and the accompanying funny music will keep playing in Portland a while longer.
SP Jimmy Wharton, 23, B:L, T:L (7-5, 4.41 ERA | 7-5, 4.41 ERA) – former #4 pick debuted ahead of schedule in the middle of last year and was beaten around quite a bit; command is not where it needs to be, and he’s still honing the curve/slider combo that should make him an effective weapon. Maybe by the end of this year?
SP Ian Lowry *, 30, B:R, T:R (8-12, 4.36 ERA | 49-89, 4.56 ERA) – this year’s rental on the cheap spent most of his career on the Wolves, partially explaining that record, and I can’t make any promises that it’s gonna get better yet. Lowry at least has a good cutter and slider to generate groundballs, so some actual defense should help him.

SP/MR Javy Carpio *, 32, B:R, T:R (5-4, 3.08 ERA, 3 SV | 17-13, 3.89 ERA, 5 SV) – four-pitch pitcher from Cuba that hung around the Rebels for the last seven years, but repeatedly passed through waivers untouched. When he started he was rather ineffective, but maybe he can present value in a multiple-inning role.
SP/MR Gabriel Rios, 28, B:L, T:L (4-1, 2.35 ERA, 1 SV | 18-20, 3.68 ERA, 2 SV) – Rios wants to start, and we always muse that Rios could start, but whenever Rios does start, it’s usually a disaster. While he reigned in the terrible control and 5.8 BB/9 he showed when he *did* start for most of the 2067 season, we’re not necessarily dying to get back to that unhappy place.
MR Edgar Gutierrez *, 27, B:L, T:R (no stats) – free agent signing out of Mexico with a good circle change and a curve that’s not curving very well. Control should be good, and maybe we can have a good seventh-inning option here.
MR Victor Ramirez *, 38, B:R, T:R (2-12, 5.98 ERA, 17 SV | 52-55, 4.27 ERA, 35 SV) – free agent signing that got NO defense from the Loggers’ lumber department last season (.377 BABIP) and should do better with an infield with a full set of paws behind him. If no, then he was at least relatively cheap.
SU Danny Nava, 28, B:R, T:R (3-1, 1.92 ERA | 41-30, 3.43 ERA, 50 SV) – this four-pitch righty that led the FL in saves in 2065 and then started 28 games the year after that came over from the Thunder in July 2068 and managed to pitch 22.2 innings for the Critters with ZERO walks (!!), which didn’t mean he didn’t give up some runs through other means. The flyball pitcher’s stats were more reasonable, but he struck out 5.4 batters for every walk and wasn’t constantly being taken over the fence, so that alone makes him a strong eighth-inning option on this team.
SU Ricky McMahan, 28, B:L, T:L (3-3, 2.91 ERA | 17-13, 3.38 ERA, 10 SV) – steady work from this left-hander who shook off his awful control issues a few years ago and is now usually not a reason for concern.
CL Pedro Valentin, 30, B:S, T:R (3-1, 1.62 ERA, 39 SV | 23-16, 2.69 ERA, 108 SV) – led the FL in saves in his first Coons year in 2068 after being acquired in that mixed-bag deal with the Cyclones along with Jared Duhe and “Rated-R” Rautenstrauch, and is the last piece of that deal still actually with the team (which also means he missed out on two rings in Cincy while trying to keep this pig stye together, hey-ho). He brings a GORGEOUS curveball and a 96mph heater and I don’t really have any complaints about anything right now (!) …

C Jake Flowe, 27, B:L, T:R (.303, 6 HR, 37 RBI | .278, 21 HR, 116 RBI) – Flowe’s second season as primary catcher saw him hit .303, which was barely enough for an above-average OPS. Not that power we hoped we were gonna get, and he’s *fine* but not *great* behind the dish. An upgrade was not in the wallet, though.
C/3B Willie Jalomo, 23, B:S, T:R (.250, 0 HR, 2 RBI | .250, 0 HR, 2 RBI) – a decently defensive young catcher that didn’t really hit a lot and somehow wiggled into a roster spot with the peculiar ability to play third base, also symptomatic of a team that has 40% of its budget invested in just four players and has to cut corners with everything else. Then again, we were not exactly thrilled by any of our 1-year rentals those last couple of years.

1B Jerry Morejon *, 28, B:L, T:L (.281, 15 HR, 64 RBI | .277, 81 HR, 358 RBI) – somehow, in January, the answer to “what’s next after 11 years of Joel Starr at first?” became Morejon, who split 2069 between the Rebs and Warriors, and came over in a trade with the latter. He’s weird in that he is speedy on the bases, but does not do a lot with the glove and his power is not extraordinary, so I don’t think he’ll last as long as Starr.
1B/LF/RF/2B/3B/CF/SS Carlos Fumero, 28, B:R, T:R (.285, 7 HR, 48 RBI | .305, 29 HR, 422 RBI) – former Rookie of the Year and defensive Swiss Army knife that was acquired from the Knights a year ago for Jaden Wilson and started a lot at second base, but we kinda evolved past that and now he figures to platoon with Morejon when he’s not subbing elsewhere or we fill the DL again.
2B/SS/3B Adam Yocum *, 29, B:R, T:R (.298, 0 HR, 41 RBI | .325, 6 HR, 492 RBI) – acquired from the Warriors in a different deal than Morejon, Yocum brings elite on-base, single-slapper skills and combines it with a steady glove and a positive attitude. He’ll need it.
3B/LF/RF J.P. Gallo, 31, B:S, T:R (.232, 18 HR, 82 RBI | .247, 155 HR, 653 RBI) – Gallo returns as third baseman after a productive first half and a second half where we kept looking for a pulse and never found one. His defense also seems to be breaking up, but the good news is that he’ll be a free agent after the season.
2B/3B/SS/CF John Katzman *, 25, B:R, T:R (.287, 11 HR, 72 RBI | .283, 48 HR, 316 RBI) – the Raccoons paid dearly and a lot to get Katzman away from the Wolves where his talents were largely wasted; while short is not his best position, it’s better this way round than with Yocum at short. Katzman can hit for a high average with power and brings speed and nimble paws to turn the double play, and he’s somehow only 25 and signed to a *relatively* friendly contract given his offensive output!
2B/SS/3B/RF Josh Mireles, 24, B:R, T:R (.195, 1 HR, 9 RBI | .195, 1 HR, 9 RBI) – the Raccoons ran out of money before they could get another proper backup infielder, so we’ll have to make do with Mireles, who hit NOTHING in 128 at-bats as a rookie. At least he’s a good gloveman, and he might enter quite a few games as defensive replacement.

LF/RF/CF Steve Humphries *, 33, B:R, T:R (.299, 14 HR, 63 RBI | .277, 77 HR, 518 RBI) – the Raccoons shoveled $36M into the oven to sign the former Titans outfielder as free agent, making him the chronologically first big addition to the roster before the trades for infielders were made. Humphries is a 5-time Gold Glover that still roams leftfield like a young one, and he brings some experience in how you win a title, or don’t suck in general, which this team needs. He is also an elite OBP hitter, and will bat leadoff for the team.
CF Tyler Wharton, 32, B:R, T:R (.308, 29 HR, 82 RBI | .327, 304 HR, 1,215 RBI) – TYLER WHARTON!! Okay, the start in Portland was slow for the 7-time FL Player of the Year, and then he went on the DL, at which point the team simply collapsed. Had a strong second half though, up to standards almost, and if he got a good start this year I wasn’t sure why he shouldn’t bop more homers than Gaytan was giving up on the other end.
RF Jose Corral, 29, B:L, T:L (.241, 12 HR, 58 RBI | .265, 92 HR, 407 RBI) – horrendous 2069 season that we don’t really want to talk about again, where he somehow managed to post a negative WAR and that’s how he’s now fallen into a platoon with van Otterdijk.
RF/LF George van Otterdijk, 25, B:R, T:R (.299, 11 HR, 43 RBI | .284, 12 HR, 48 RBI) – here’s a secret: we don’t really know what to do with the young Dutch Antillean, who suddenly slugged in the second half, but who is also rather dim on defense and is royally offended by the idea of ball four.
LF/CF/RF Benito Otal, 25, B:L, T:L (.263, 6 HR, 42 RBI | .266, 8 HR, 61 RBI) – quirky and speedy defensive outfielder, including competence in center, who hit for more than expected during his rookie half-season, but in 2069 went from bench to starting lineup to sucking and back to the bench. One of the many filler players on this team.

On disabled list: Nobody.

Otherwise unavailable: Nobody.

Other roster movement:
MR Mike Davis, 26, B:R, T:R (0-0, 0.82 ERA | 0-0, 0.82 ERA) – optioned to AAA; right-hander with a sinker and slider that didn’t perform well at all in St. Pete last season, and somehow escaped damage in Portland where he walked seven guys in 11 innings.
MR Jason Holzmeister, 25, B:S, T:R (4-1, 3.41 ERA | 9-4, 4.04 ERA) – optioned to AAA; former Rule 5 pick that can only hold onto a job when the only other options are to shoot him in the knee or send him back to the Falcons.
MR Matt Schmieder, 28, B:R, T:R (1-2, 5.36 ERA | 3-5, 5.31 ERA) – waived and DFA’ed; this Alabama righty brings a very good curveball, but he can miss pretty badly both outside the strike zone and inside it, too; gave up eight homers in 47 garbage innings last year.
MR Antonio Pacheco, 23, B:L, T:L (1-0, 1.64 ERA | 1-0, 1.64 ERA) – optioned to AAA; this left-hander did dazzle with the knuckle curve at the end of last season, but we also know what his walk numbers were in AA and AAA that same season (hint: not pretty) and maybe a bit more seasoning will help him.
SP/MR Juan Vega, 27, B:R, T:R (0-0, 1.50 ERA | 0-0, 2.57 ERA) – optioned to AAA; four muddy pitches and a vicious attitude that I can’t bother dealing with.
1B Dan Gomez, 25, B:L, T:L (.278, 4 HR, 17 RBI | .278, 4 HR, 17 RBI) – optioned to AAA; run-of-the-mill first-sacker that would have made the roster in the platoon with Fumero (and more as a placeholder than anybody expected to bring actual value) if we hadn’t somehow tumbled into possession of Jerry Morejon late in the offseason.
1B/LF/RF/3B Jamie Colter, 28, B:L, T:R (.286, 0 HR, 1 RBI | .268, 8 HR, 52 RBI) – waived and DFA’ed; surely not the worst type of contact bat and versatile on defense, but the Raccoons were not interested in spare left-handed bench bats at this point…

Everybody not mentioned by now has already been waived, reassigned, or sacrificed to the baseball gods this offseason.

OPENING DAY LINEUP:

Vs. RHP: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon (Fumero) – 3B Gallo – RF Corral (van Otterdijk) – C Flowe – P
(Vs. LHP: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – 3B Gallo – 1B Fumero – C Flowe – P)

The lineup has tilted to the right with a completely new 1-2-3 punch, all of whom are right-handed batters. Fumero and van Otterdijk are even additional right-handed options. The boys will probably decide who plays how often in those platoons, and they’re not gonna be broken down just by handedness. The hot paw plays. None of the switch-hitters (Gallo, Jalomo) is particularly *good* against lefty pitching, so they’re not helping as much as they could be.

OFF SEASON CHANGES:

The Raccoons “won” the offseason again according to BNN, and don’t they ever? It just never turns into rings. The Coons gained +12.1 WAR, of which the Humphries signing was half. While the Yocum deal was almost WAR-neutral, we gained another +5.3 WAR on Katzman, and then +2.4 more on the Morejon trade. The Caprio trade with the Rebs was +1.5 WAR, partially just by getting rid of Rated-R. Starr and Leggett (going out) and Lowry (coming in) were all worth north of 1 WAR in one direction or another.

Top 5: Raccoons (+12.1), Crusaders (+11.8), Buffaloes (+9.1), Warriors (+5.2), Thunder (+5.0)
Bottom 5: Rebels (-7.6), Miners (-7.7), Wolves (-8.5), Falcons (-8.8), Cyclones (-8.9)

The remaining CL North teams were all over the map. The Indians came seventh with +4.7 WAR, followed by the damn Elks in eighth with +4.0 WAR. The Loggers might as well have stayed home (12th, -0.1 WAR), and the Titans took quite the beating, 19th with -7.2 WAR.

PREDICTION TIME:

Last year I thought the team might win 90 and they didn’t come bloody close. The perspective has changed a bit now, with all the contracts that we have accumulated for an actual lineup that might actually score runs. Big Wharton, Yocum, Humphries, and Katzman are all signed through 2074 (2075 for Katzman), and that’s gonna be our window now. If we don’t ignite immediately, and with the rickety pitching I don’t think we will, then the window might be closer to three years, because good luck trading Humphries and Wharton once they’re 35.

But yeah, the team should be a lot better now, and I will make two predictions actually. One is that we’re at least competitive and win 86 games, and the other is that we actually score 4.4 runs per game. That would be 713 runs for a full season.

(despaired smile)

PLAYER DEVELOPMENT:

Of course the flurry of trades in the winter had costs. The Raccoons had the best ranked minor league system a year ago, but for various reasons then took the axe to it, and now are left with the fifth-worst ranked farm in the league.

Last year we had 11 ranked prospects, of which eight were in the top 100, and four even in the top 20. No top 20 prospect remains, we barely have a top 50 prospect, and only three top 100 and eight ranked prospects in total are still on the books.

For removals from the list we had a pair that matured to the majors in #5 Jimmy Wharton and #92 Josh Mireles, where they did so and so. But the big wrecking ball to the farm came in the offseason, where we traded away all of #2 Nelson Aguilar, #20 Oscar Gaitan, #79 Phil Townsend, and #163 Adam Quebbeman. On top of that, injury reduced the #66 rating of Val Centeno to nothing, and #188 Jack Hamel quietly slipped out.

50th (-35) – AA CL Noah Newhard, 21 – 2068 supplemental round pick by Raccoons
57th (+92) – A SS/3B Danny Reyes, 18 – 2067 scouting discovery by Raccoons
89th (new) – A LF/INF/CF Rob Robinson, 19 – 2069 fourth-round pick by Raccoons
138th (new) – AA RF/LF Isaac Bishop, 22 – 2069 first-round pick by Raccoons
142nd (-48) – AAA OF Jesus Guerrero, 23 – 2063 July IFA signing by Raccoons
151st (new) – AA SP/MR Mike Pavan, 23 – 2069 supplemental round pick by Raccoons
157th (new) – A 2B/SS Ismael Tenorio, 19 – 2067 scouting discovery by Raccoons
160th (new) – A INF Omar Vigil, 19 – 2067 scouting discovery by Raccoons

The franchise top 10 were completed by AAA SP Val Centeno (23, 2065 July IFA) and A RF/LF Kory Steiner (19, 2068 fifth round).

Finally, the top 10 overall prospects this year are:

#1 (new) – TOP AA CL Brent Shaw, 19
#2 (+1) – SFB ML OF/1B Ryan Redding, 20
#3 (+1) – TOP AAA OF Javier Velazquez, 22
#4 (-2) – SAL A OF/1B Nelson Aguilar, 19
#5 (+2) – OCT AA RF/INF/CF Jay Moore, 21

#6 (+3) – DAL AA INF Carlos Saldana, 22
#7 (+6) – SFW AAA SP Juan Arreola, 25
#8 (+2) – VAN AA SP Alex Tabares, 21
#9 (-3) – BOS AAA CL Jay Krenek, 22
#10 (+74) – MIL AA SP Danny Ramirez, 21

Shaw was the #1 pick in the 2069 draft – and the only new professional on the list, which was truly a rare occasion. Seven of the ten had already been a top 10 prospect last year. The other three promoted to the majors; last year’s top prospect CL Gustavo Vega reached Sacramento mid-season and made 25 relief appearances for a 3.41 ERA. #5 SP Jimmy Wharton made 14 starts for a 4.41 ERA with the Raccoons. And #8 CL Kelvin Castillo made his debut mid-season with the Gold Sox and pitched to a 4.82 ERA in 35 relief appearances with two saves.

Both #4 Nelson Aguilar (from Portland to Salem) and #8 Alex Tabares (from Richmond to Vancouver) were traded this winter.

Next: first pitch.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (0-0) @ Canadiens (0-0) – April 8-10, 2070

To my extreme dismay, the Raccoons had to start their season in the frozen tundra, which meant that I was not able to attend, being still on Canada’s Most Wanted list. They couldn’t even fill it to ten faces, but somehow mine was up there right at #3 for all those years…! Anyway, I had to smolder at home in the office and occasionally break into hysterical bursts of “I bet we’re gonna score TEN on Opening Day!” – because that was surely not gonna end in bitter disappointment. The damn Elks had at least laid down for the season series last year, which the Raccoons had won (10-8) for the first time in eight years. They were a popular pick to finish bottoms in the North – assuming the Raccoons could keep their pitching together and their new batting toys off the DL.

Projected matchups:
Nick Walla (0-0) vs. Nate Freeman (0-0)
Vinny Morales (0-0) vs. Ricardo Montoya (0-0)
Tony Gaytan (0-0) vs. Juan Rosado (0-0)

All Elks starters were right-handed. The Coons started the season with 16 straight games without an off day, ignoring being off on the actual Opening Day Monday of the season. No rest for the wicked until the 24th.

Game 1
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Walla
VAN: SS Barraza – LF J. Hawkins – RF Lozada – 1B An. Ramirez – CF D. Moore – 3B C. Castro – C J. Contreras – 2B Den. Wright – P N. Freeman

The Raccoons sure made an instant impact on the Elks, who saw Adam Yocum reach on a soft single before Nate Freeman – like Nick Walla a hot contender for the 2068 CL ERA title before late fades – gave up back-to-back bombs to John Katzman and Tyler Wharton for an instant 3-0 score! Tah!! (excitedly hops around the office with Honeypaws in his arms)

Now, of course the Elks were not gonna lie down that easily. Nick Walla got tagged for a run in the bottom 2nd on hits by Dan Moore, Jonathan Contreras, and Dennis Wright, and his stuff looked it was still skiing up in the mountains. He struck out just two batters through five innings, while scattering five hits, just as many as the Raccoons got off Freeman in the same timeframe, as they calmed down noticeably after the first inning. At least until Tyler Wharton hit his second homer of the game, another solo piece in the sixth inning that extended the lead to 4-1 again. Freeman racked up ten strikeouts by stretch time, and the Elks then really started to hit Walla. Contreras went deep to left in the bottom 7th, and Wright hit a triple to right and scored on a pinch-hit groundout by Hector Moreno, which suddenly narrowed the score to 4-3. Roberto Barraza grounded out for the second out of the inning, but Jeff Hawkins then got Walla for another double, and that was the end for the Coons’ starter. Danny Nava came in and popped out Roberto Lozada to end the inning.

Elks lefty Josh Atkins walked Katzman and Wharton in the eighth inning, but the Raccoons could not do anything with that as George van Otterdijk popped out hitting for Jerry Morejon, and Gallo grounded out to second to end the inning. McMahan retired Antonio Ramirez, Dan Moore, and Castro in order in the bottom 8th. The Coons didn’t get past a Jake Flowe single off long-ago Coon Elijah LaBat in the ninth inning, and the gap remained a skinny run into the bottom 9th. Pedro Valentin got the ball, obviously. John Bustillos flew out to center before Wright reached on an error by Katzman just as we inserted Josh Mireles at short and moved Katz to second for “defense”. However, Jose Alvarez and Barraza made calm outs to end the game and give the Coons that Opening Day win. 4-3 Raccoons. Katzman 2-3, BB, HR, 2 RBI; T. Wharton 2-3, BB, 2 HR, 2 RBI;

Jake Flowe extended a 12-game hitting streak to end the 2069 season with that late single.

Actually, let me rephrase that “no off days thing” – Wednesday brought snow to Blizzard City, and that day’s game was postponed for an honest attempt to play two on Thursday. This was after the Indians-Loggers season opener on Tuesday was already frozen out at America’s ice box, the Great Lakes.

Given no *actual* off days on the schedule, a spot start was right away on the table. Rios? Carpio?

Game 2
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Morales
VAN: SS Barraza – C J. Contreras – RF Lozada – 1B An. Ramirez – CF D. Moore – 3B C. Castro – LF Bustillos – 2B Den. Wright – P R. Montoya

The Elks got the start for the double header, plonking Vinny Morales for three singles with Barraza, Contreras, and Ramirez before Dan Moore cranked a first-inning grand slam for a 4-0 score. Dennis Wright in the second and Jonathan Contreras in the third added solo home runs, leading to Morales’ early demise from a 6-0 game. Gabriel Rios replaced him and got out of the inning, but then got whacked around himself in the fourth. Bustillos and Wright hit singles to begin the inning, and while Montoya’s poor bunt forced out the lead runner, the Elks still scored three more tuns with a Contreras RBI single and Lozada’s 2-run double with two outs. Meanwhile, the Raccoons had three singles through five innings and were not even remotely near scoring a run. (rolls into a ball on the trusty brown couch)

Not getting near scoring position was even preferable to the sixth inning, which Steve Humphries led off with a triple and then was left stranded on third base on three pops and grounders by those very expensive 2-3-4 hitters. The game was about just getting through it and perhaps have some pitching left over for the second one, should it actually be played. Victor Ramirez made his Coons debut and put up a zero in the bottom 5th, which at this point had to be considered a rousing success, while Edgar Gutierrez made his ABL debut outta Mexico with two innings, but gave up a homer to Antonio Ramirez in the bottom 7th, just after J.P. Gallo had tried to do some rallying with a solo jack off Montoya in the top 7th. Javy Carpio then also made his Coons debut, allowed three singles right out of the gate, walked in a run, and somehow only got tagged for three more runs in this absolute rout of a game. Katzman hit a homer off Roberto Navarro in the ninth he should have saved for the next game. 13-2 Canadiens. Gallo 2-4, HR, RBI;

Ow.

Game 3
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – 3B Gallo – 1B Fumero – C Jalomo – P Gaytan
VAN: SS Barraza – LF J. Hawkins – RF Lozada – 1B An. Ramirez – CF D. Moore – 3B C. Castro – C J. Sandoval – 2B Onelas – P J. Rosado

It was bitterly cold for the nightcap and right after the first inning Tony Gaytan confided to the pitching coach that he couldn’t feel his claw tips for the near-freezing temps. Good foundation for a guy that gives the souvenirs up by the dozen! However, the Elks had only one hit off him in the first two innings, and then the Raccoons somehow scored. Tyler Wharton had been on base but was caught stealing in the second, and Jalomo drew a 1-out walk in the bottom 3rd before being forced out on Gaytan’s bad bunt. Back-to-back doubles by Humphries and Yocum – RBI’s for the latter – put the first two runs on the board though before Katzman grounded out. However, maybe the ball just wasn’t gonna fly outta here in arctic temperatures. Wharton clocked a fastball that sounded absolutely gone off the bat, but dropped into Hawkins’ glove on the edge of the warning track in the fourth. Gaytan staggered around leadoff singles by Jerry Sandoval in the third and Hawkins in the fourth, and retired the 7-8-9 in order to get the shutout through five, but had only one strikeout to his name.

Hawkins hit a 1-out double to center in the bottom 6th before Lozada popped out. Ramirez grounded one to Yocum that was misfielded off Yocum’s frozen paw for an error, and the tying runs were on the corners. Dan Moore hit a grounder to the left side that Katzman dove for and knocked down, but ended up with his face in a snow pile and had no play – infield single, and the Elks scored an unearned run, 2-1. Gaytan then managed to get Carlos Castro to hack himself out to end the inning. Top 7th, and Rosado hit Gallo leading off, then walked Fumero on four pitches. Gallo was then caught stealing third, and the battery made poor outs to kill the inning for good. Gaytan got the 7-8-9 in order again, followed by some actual offense in his favor when Yocum tripled to right with one out in the eighth. Katzman singled to center to get the run home, 3-1, and when Moore clanked the ball with his hoof for an error, Katz jiggered up to second. Wharton was walked intentionally. Katz had the urge to get back to the dugout where they had a mobile heater the entire time huddled around, so when the Otter singled up the middle to center there was no stopping him at third base. Moore’s throw home was late, and the run scored. The trail runners advanced as well, but Rosado walked Gallo regardless to fill the bases. Morejon pinch-hit for Fumero, but popped out to short, and Jalomo flew out to right to leave the bags full. Gaytan returned to get the 1-2-3 batters in order in the eighth (Katzman shagging a scorched liner that felt oddly comfortable in the paw upon making impact), then was hit for. Valentin allowed singles to Moore and Castro in the ninth inning, but held on with a K on Hector Moreno and a Bustillos groundout to end the game. 4-1 Raccoons. Humphries 2-5, 2B; Yocum 3-5, 3B, 2B, 2 RBI; T. Wharton 2-3, BB; Gaytan 8.0 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 3 K, W (1-0);

Raccoons (2-1) vs. Knights (3-0) – April 11-13, 2070

The Coons came home already thinking about spot starts, but not for this series, but rather Monday afterwards. The Knights had thrashed the Aces for *32* runs in three games, so I was a bit queasy. They had allowed *eight*. Early doors! Last year we won six of nine games against them, the third year in a row that we took that season series.

Projected matchups:
Jimmy Wharton (0-0) vs. Rob Wilkinson (0-0)
Ian Lowry (0-0) vs. Scott Triebwasser (0-0)
Nick Walla (1-0, 4.05 ERA) vs. Adam Lunn (1-0, 0.00 ERA)

We will have to wait a bit longer for our first southpaw opponent of the year.

Looking at Monday, we’d play those battered Aces. Their lineup looked like we’d rather send a right-hander up for a spot start, which would then by Carpio, 27.00 ERA be damned.

Game 1
ATL: CF J. Soto – SS Guangorena – C Hart – RF Da. Mendoza – 1B DiPrimio – 3B Schomer – 2B J. King – LF Troxel – P Wilkinson
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – C Flowe – P J. Wharton

The Knights had the bases loaded immediately as Jorge Soto doubled, Tomas Guangorena singled, and Jimmyboy fudged Justin Hart’s comebacker for an error. This was a good time for an early mound conference, and Wharton responded to suggestions that he might wanna stop ******* up with getting a grounder from David Mendoza to third that Gallo used to tap his base with, but the throw to second was late, and then a 4-6-3 double play from Kris DiPrimio, keeping the damage to one run. Katzman made an error in the second to keep traffic levels high, and in the third the Knights put Hart and Mendoza on with singles before DiPrimio popped out and Jon Schomer sent Big Wharton back to the warning track to make an inning-ending catch. The Coons’ first base hit was a leadoff jack by Jose Corral in the bottom 3rd, tying the game, and Jimmyboy hit a double with one out, but overran the base and was tagged out as he displayed more symptoms of overexcitement over starting the home opener.

Soto drew a leadoff walk in the fifth and Guangorena singled as trouble began to brew on the bases, but Hart hit into a 6-4-3 and Mendoza also grounded out to dispel the threat. The sixth then started JUST like that, with a leadoff walk to DiPrimio and a Schomer single. Joe King then hit into a 4-6-3 double play and Tom Troxel grounded out.

Rob Wilkinson left the 1-1 game with an injury in the bottom 6th, still pitching a 2-hitter. Wharton was still in for the seventh. Soto got him for a 1-out double, but Guangorena flew out easily. Justin Hart, hitting .471, was then a terrible 2-out batter to appear. The switch-hitter murdered left-handers especially, but had looked bad for several at- … no, he singled to left and brought in the go-ahead run. Wharton then walked PH Jorge Munoz on his way out of the game. Nava cleaned up behind him when he got DiPrimio to ground out. The Coons got Yocum on base to begin the bottom 7th, but Katzman whiffed and Wharton hit into a double play. The Knights instead tacked on another run against Victor Ramirez in the ninth, as Soto bashed a leadoff triple and scored on a Guangorena sac fly. The Coons never got another paw on base. 3-1 Knights.

Miserable game.

Game 2
ATL: CF J. Soto – SS Guangorena – RF Da. Mendoza – C Hart – 1B DiPrimio – 2B J. Munoz – 3B Schomer – LF Valencia – P Triebwasser
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – C Flowe – 3B Jalomo – P Lowry

Lowry made his Coons debut and broke Adam Yocum on his first play, allowing a scorched liner to Soto that Yocum caught with a weird leap and stretch, but cranked his back and left the game after a lengthy on-field consultation with trainer Luis Silva. Josh Mireles replaced him, playing short, with Katz going over to second. Lowry put up two scoreless before Big Wharton opened the bottom 2nd with a double to left. Jerry Morejon ended an 0-10 spill to begin his Coons season and singled, putting them on the corners. Corral popped out, but Flowe managed to get the game’s first run home with a groundout, which was also all for the inning. Runners were on the corners with two outs again in the bottom 3rd after Mireles and Katzman singled. Wharton struck out and nobody scored.

Offense remained absent for the Raccoons, and the Knights tied the game in the sixth when Triebwasser and Soto hit singles off Lowry, pulled off a double steal, and then got the tying run home on Guangorena’s groundout before David Mendoza left the go-ahead runner at third base with another groundout. Lowry made it to the stretch in the 1-1 tie, then was hit for with Corral, who legged out an infield single with nobody on and two gone in the bottom 7th. Triebwasser allowed another single to Humphries, but Mireles popped out.

The eighth saw the Knights get Joe King and Guangorena hits off Gutierrez before Gabriel Rios came on and rung up PH Santiago Valdez and Hart to keep the game tied. Valentin also scattered two runners in the ninth inning, but pulled through the inning, leaving Schomer and Troxel stranded when John Baxley grounded out to short from the #9 hole. Still tied, the Coons were bringing the bottom of the order against Alvaro Garza, right-hander, in the ninth inning. The Coons’ pair of catchers was hitting 1-for-20 for the season, so there was room for improvement, but Flowe grounded out and Jalomo flew out to left. Gallo whiffed in the pitcher’s spot, and the game went to extras.

There, Danny Nava held off the Knights for two innings, but the Raccoons just. Could. Not. Get. Going. Morejon drew a walk in the 11th and was left at first, and that was the extent of offense they showed. The last spot start option for Monday disappeared when the Coons had to go to Carpio for the 12th inning and beyond, bringing him in with a double switch, Otal replacing the Otter, but playing left, with Humphries moving to right. Carpio only had to pitch one inning, giving up FIVE runs on seven hits. Schomer and Troxel opened with singles, Lorenzo Marquez (nods acknowledgement) swatted a 3-run homer, and then they just added on for fun. The Coons didn’t even reach base. 6-1 Knights. Mireles 2-5; Katzman 2-5; Corral (PH) 1-1; Lowry 7.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 5 K;

(starts to feel despair)

As Adam Yocum went to the DL on Sunday, the Raccoons called up 27-year-old Jacob Davis, the textbook definition of “warm body”. Davis would wear #29, his old #38 having been given to Victor Ramirez.

Game 3
ATL: CF J. Soto – SS Guangorena – RF Da. Mendoza – C Hart – 1B DiPrimio – 2B J. Munoz – 3B Schomer – LF S. Valdez – P Lunn
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Katzman – RF Corral – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – 1B Fumero – C Flowe – SS Mireles – P Walla

Nick Walla retired Atlanta in order the first time through and struck out the side in the second inning, then bunted Flowe (walk) and Mireles (scratch single) into scoring position in the bottom 3rd. Humphries whiffed and Katzman flew out to Soto to leave them stranded. – Cristiano! What is going on?? (panic in the eyes)

Walla retired 11 straight before David Mendoza took him deep in the fourth inning for the game’s first run. The Coons began their half of the fourth with a Corral groundout before Wharton singled to left and stole second – the first steal by a Coon this year after four failed attempts – followed by a walk to Gallo in a full count. Fumero singled the bags full, Flowe whiffed, and Mireles floated one out for Mendoza to pick down. Humphries singled and stole second in the fifth inning, but was thrown out at the plate by Valdez when he tried to come home from second on a Katzman single.

The next thing to go wrong then appeared to be Nick Walla’s arm shaking itself loose. He had not walked a batter in the first 11 innings of the season, and struck out Lunn to begin the top 6th, but then walked Soto and Guangorena, who took off for a double steal. Flowe threw the ball away, allowing Soto to score, but Walla kept walking Mendoza. Hart hit an RBI single, and then Walla walked DiPrimio and Munoz (the latter with the bases loaded) before being retrieved and taken down the tunnel by Silva. Edgar Gutierrez got a 5-4-3 double play from Schomer to end the inning and keep the damage to four total runs on three hits and five walks, although our concerns were different altogether at that point.

The Coons were deep in the doldrums in the bottom 7th, making outs with Flowe and Mireles before Benito Otal pinch-hit for Gutierrez and singled. Humphries hit another single, and Katzman knocked an RBI double, suddenly bringing the tying run to the plate against new pitcher Evan Alvey. Van Otterdijk batted for Corral against the southpaw, then grounded out on a 3-0 pitch with Wharton behind him, the braindead little ****. Wharton then doubled to right off Alvey to begin the eighth instead, but with nobody on base of course. McMahan and Ramirez kept the Knights from scoring more runs in the late innings, while Mireles then opened the bottom 9th with a triple off Erik Swain. He scored on Otal’s groundout, but that in itself helped little to overcome a 3-run deficit. Humph and Katz were retired to end the game and complete the sweep. 4-2 Knights. Katzman 2-5, 2B, RBI; T. Wharton 2-4, 2B; Mireles 2-4, 3B; Otal (PH) 1-2, RBI;

(looks pale)

Luis Silva checked every square inch of Walla’s right arm overnight and found nothing, and I don’t know whether that is supposed to calm me the **** down now!? FIVE WALKS IN AN INNING, LUIS SILVA!! FIVE!! (shakes)

Raccoons (2-4) vs. Aces (3-3) – April 14-16, 2070

The Aces had just swept the Indians, but still entered having allowed the most runs so far in the CL. They were sixth in runs scored, while the Raccoons were tied for last with the Falcons. The Aces’ rotation had suffered the worst against the Knights, as evident in a couple of ERA’s that were coming up here. But at least they had all their ducks in a row. This season series had also been won 6-3 by the Coons last year.

Projected matchups:
Cody Childress (0-0) vs. Alex Duarte (0-1, 14.73 ERA)
Vinny Morales (0-1, 20.25 ERA) vs. Ignazio Flores (0-1, 23.63 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (1-0, 0.00 ERA) vs. Danny Ryba (1-0, 1.29 ERA)

Flores would be the first left-handed pitcher for us to contend with this season, and the only in this series.

The Coons exchanged Jacob Davis, who had not gotten into Sunday’s game, back for spot starter Cody Childress, who had gone 2-10 with a 3.94 ERA for Portland last year. Morales had only thrown 48 pitches in his rounding up by the Elks on Thursday, but he looked like he could use every second of rest. Childress had not packed any spare underwear with the understanding that he was gonna be right back in St. Pete on Tuesday.

Game 1
LVA: SS Hatakeyama – CF Phelps – LF Lorenzo – C Haynes – RF A. Rosado – 3B Rodewald – 2B J. Williams – 1B Caceres – P A. Duarte
POR: LF Humphries – SS Katzman – RF Corral – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – 1B Morejon – 2B Fumero – C Flowe – P Childress

Koji Hatakeyama opened the game with a double to left-center, but Josh Phelps grounded out and pops by Vic Lorenzo and Chris Haynes kept him stranded at third base. The Coons instead took a 1-0 lead in the bottom 1st on singles by Humphries, Wharton, and Gallo, who got the RBI. The lead lasted for one out before Childress gave it back, and then some, on Jorge Caceres’ score-flipping 2-run double in the top 2nd, which plated Alfredo Rosado and Matt Rodewald. The two scorers got on base again with a 2-out double and catcher’s interference, respectively, in the third inning, but Jimmy Williams’ grounder to Katzman kept them stranded.

The middle innings were rather calm; Childress finished six innings of 5-hit ball, but then ran out of pitches. He still had a chance for a W in the bottom 6th, when Corral reached base, but was forced out by Wharton, and then Gallo and Morejon got on base with two outs, bringing up Fumero with the bags stacked, but he grounded out miserably to short. The Coons then gave the ball to Javy Carpio, who couldn’t get much worse from his blowup against the Knights, but at least gave it an honest go in the seventh inning. He allowed a leadoff triple to Hakateyama, plated the run with a wild pitch, and then allowed singles to Phelps and Lorenzo before balking in Phelps’ run with two outs. It was truly breathtaking. Jimmy Williams and Tyler Wharton then both hit a triple in the eighth inning and neither scored – the Coons declining to bring in the run with Gallo popping out and Morejon hitting an inning-ending grounder to short in a 3-0 count. (gob hangs open) In the ninth, the Coons got a leadoff single from Fumero before Mireles pinch-hit and smacked into a double play. 4-1 Aces. Humphries 2-4; T. Wharton 2-4, 3B; Gallo 2-4, RBI; Fumero 2-4; Childress 6.0 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 R, 2 BB, 3 K, L (0-1);

(sad stare)

Cody Childress (0-1, 3.00 ERA) went on waivers after the game, and the clueless Coons brought up Dan Gomez, who had started the AAA season hitting .313, but was not going to play against the left-handed pitcher on Tuesday anyway.

Game 2
LVA: SS Hatakeyama – 2B Cervantez – LF Lorenzo – C Haynes – RF A. Rosado – 3B Rodewald – CF Phelps – 1B A. Jones – P I. Flores
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – 1B Fumero – 3B Gallo – SS Mireles – C Jalomo – P Gaytan*

Portland again scored in the first inning when Flores nicked Wharton, who was brought around on singles by the Otter and Fumero before Gallo lined out to Hatakeyama. Mireles also was hit, but doubled off by Jalomo in the second. Hatakeyama would hit a triple and score on an error by Mireles to tie the game in the third inning, but Tyler Wharton exacted revenge for the earlier plunking with a solo homer to left, giving Gaytan a new 2-1 lead.

Offense was slow again in the middle innings, with Gaytan gliding through on a 3-hitter while the Coons put Katz and Big Wharton on the corners with 2-out singles in the fifth but van Otterdijk declined to bring in a run and popped out. The 2-1 lead was still up in the eighth inning when Mireles made another error to put Lorenzo on base to begin the inning, and then Gaytan balked him to second base as if Lorenzo wasn’t fast enough anyway. Chris Haynes hit a scratch single to put them on the corners, but Alfredo Rosado popped out to Katzman. Gaytan faced Matt Rodewald, gave up the game-tying single on the first pitch, and then was lifted for Nava, who whiffed Phelps, and McMahan to face Adam Jones, but who got to ring up PH Byron Duncan instead to keep the go-ahead runners on base.

Bottom 8th, Katzman hit a leadoff single to center. Wharton’s long fly was caught by Phelps, and van Otterdijk popped out. Fumero singled, sending the go-ahead run to third base, but Gallo flew out to Rosado and they continued to be just infuriating. Hatakeyama reached on a 1-out error by McMahan in the ninth, but the southpaw cleaned up his own mess on the rug with a pop and a strikeout and kept the game tied into the bottom 9th, where the Coons launched three left-handed pinch-hitters at righty Pedro Negron, and didn’t make it out of the infield with any ball between Morejon, Flowe, and Gomez.

Deep enough in the morass to send Pedro Valentin out for two innings in April, the Coons had the 1-2-3 go down in order in the tenth against Negron, then faced righty Mel Guerra in the 11th. Corral batted for van Otterdijk and scorched a triple down the line, and so the game winner was 90 feet away with nobody out. Fumero ended it quickly with a single through the left side. 3-2 Blighters. Katzman 2-5; T. Wharton 2-4, HR, RBI; Corral (PH) 1-1, 3B; Fumero 3-5, 2 RBI; Gaytan 7.1 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 0 ER, 3 BB, 6 K; Valentin 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K, W (1-0);

Maud, please call the police. I would like to report a $30M offense missing.

With such a long string of games, we’d have to give out off days. Tyler Wharton and Steve Humphries got Wednesday off.

Meanwhile the Aces scratched Ryba for unknown reasons and sent a right-handed spot starter, Luis Ortiz (0-0, 13.50 ERA).

Game 3
LVA: SS Hatakeyama – 2B Cervantez – LF Lorenzo – C Haynes – RF A. Rosado – 3B Rodewald – CF Phelps – 1B A. Jones – P L. Ortiz
POR: 2B Fumero – SS Katzman – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – 1B Morejon – LF van Otterdijk – CF Otal – C Flowe – P Morales

Hatakeyama singled through Katzman’s legs and then stole two bases before scoring on Vic Lorenzo’s sac fly in the first inning on Wednesday, just in case you thought it couldn’t get much worse; well, Morales’ ERA didn’t get worse, thanks to getting gangbanged for six runs in 2.2 innings in his season debut… The Aces’ lead was short-lived, as in the bottom 1st Katzman singled, Corral drew a walk, and Gallo hit an RBI single. Katzman scored well ahead of Phelps’ throw home, allowing the trailing runners to advance, but Morejon whiffed and van Otterdijk flew out to leave a pair in scoring position…

Morales’ ERA then went back to the 20.25 he had started with once he gave up a home run to Alfredo Rosado to lead off the second inning, and then two more homers for four runs in the third inning. Carlos Cervantez singled with one out, and with two gone Chris Haynes homered for 424 feet, Rosado singled, and Rodewald crashed another 2-run homer. The four hits came within seven pitches.

Vinny Morales then had his sordid bum dragged through five innings before being hit for, getting whacked around some more, although when you accidentally kept them in the park, the Coons’ outfielders proved quite capable to prevent major offensive outbursts. In turn, Benito Otal hit a homer to right with Gallo on base to shorten the gap to 6-3 in the fourth inning. Fumero and Corral reached in the fifth, but didn’t score, and then the ball went to Carpio, who had to post at least one zero here in the top 6th or he’d have his moist tush voided off the roster already. He didn’t as Adam Jones legged out an infield hit and then scored on a 2-out Cervantez single, although part of the blame was on Fumero’s slow play on Jones’ grounder. However, Caprio was then taken over the fence by Haynes in the seventh, and put two more on base, and I didn’t feel like dealing with that **** for another five-and-a-half months. Josh Mireles batted for him and homered off Ortiz in the bottom 7th, not that it made much of a dent in the Aces’ lead.

We got to add an hourlong rain delay in the eighth to the non-fun, but on the other side Gallo got on base against Mel Guerra before being forced out by Morejon. Guerra walked van Otterdijk and was replaced with left-hander John Santamaria, who threw a wild pitch before allowing a run on a mighty groundout by Tyler Wharton, batting for Otal. Jalomo batted for Flowe and grounded out. Fumero drew a walk in the ninth, but that was the extent of the rally there. 8-5 Aces. Gallo 2-3, BB, RBI; Mireles (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI;

In other news

April 7 – NAS RF Austin Gordon (.200, 1 HR, 1 RBI) hits a solo home run in a 4-1 Opening Day win against the Miners to reach 300 career homers. The 33-year-old 2064 FL home run leader tags PIT SP Brian Jones (0-1, 2.84 ERA) for the milestone.
April 7 – ATL SP Adam Lunn (1-0, 0.00 ERA) throws a 3-hit shutout to beat the Aces, 7-0.
April 7 – The Titans beat the Crusaders in the XXL Version of Opening Day, not walking off, 6-5, until the 16th inning.
April 8 – Rebs OF Juan Licona (.556, 0 HR, 2 RBI) hits safely in the first two games of the season, including two singles in this day’s 8-6 loss to the Cyclones, to stretch a hitting streak started in ’69 to 20 games.
April 8 – The Warriors trade 2B Jimmy Madden (1-for-4, 0 HR, 0 RBI) to the Pacifics for SS/2B Dustin Cox (.250, 0 HR, 0 RBI).
April 10 – New Warriors closer Brad Fales (0-1, 27.00 ERA) is ruled out for the season with a gross case of shoulder inflammation.
April 10 – LAP 2B/SS/LF Zach Giddings (.778, 1 HR, 4 RBI) goes 5-for-5 with three RBI, including the walkoff home run, in a 10-8 win against the Scorpions.
April 14 – Rebels OF Juan Licona (.400, 1 HR, 7 RBI) runs his hitting streak from September to 25 games with a sixth-inning single in a 6-2 win against the Wolves.
April 14 – A broken rib is going to cost SFW OF Jordan Lopez (.280, 1 HR, 2 RBI) a month on the DL.
April 15 – SAL SP Martyn Polaco (1-1, 1.62 ERA) takes a no-hitter into the ninth inning against the Rebels, but gives up singles to RIC C/1B Willie Romero (.375, 0 HR, 1 RBI) and streaking Juan Licona (.382, 1 HR, 7 RBI) and has to settle for CL Johnny Chapman (0-0, 7.71 ERA, 1 SV) to save his 2-1 win.
April 16 – The Condors place SP Jason Brenize (0-2, 4.50 ERA) on the DL to sort out some elbow soreness. The 8-time Pitcher of the Year is expected to return at the start of May.

Player of the Week (FL): DAL CF/LF Matt Little (.429, 3 HR, 11 RBI)
Player of the Week (CL): VAN 1B Antonio Ramirez (.632, 3 HR, 7 RBI)

Complaints and stuff

Nine games. 23 runs.

Just a few select comments on the offense. Steve Humphries drew 102 walks last season, and managed two so far. He is about to half his OBP. We have four bodies for the catcher and first base jobs, and none can hit. The Yocum injury was devastating. I feel very very tired already.

Then the pitching. Vinny Morales has given up SIX homers, and Tony Gaytan none. Nor an earned run, but three walks, as we soldier on here in upside-down land. No word on Nick Walla and whether his arm has come off after that 5-walk inning that sunk him against Atlanta.

Once I am done crying here, Javy Carpio (0-1, 21.60 ERA) will go on waivers. **** that guy.

Maud, can you please call Dr. Schoenbloom? I have this hammering in my head again. I need something that dulls my brain.

Upcoming: a nice, gnarly four-city road trip to Indy, Milwaukee, Tijuana, and Oklahoma City.

Fun Fact: Jared Duhe got a .375/.474/.531 start for the Warriors.

(buries face in paws)

+++

*Silly me forgot to reset my rotation after shoving in Childress earlier.

[Westheim]

The Raccoons waived Javy Carpio (0-1, 21.60 ERA) as intended and replaced him with Jason Holzmeister on the roster, because that would make everything so much better.

Raccoons (3-6) @ Indians (3-5) – April 17-20, 2070

The defending division winners from Indy also hadn’t gotten the start they had been hoping for, sitting eighth in runs scored and runs allowed, and in fifth place. Their defense so far had been slippery when wet, but they had already stolen nine bases, while the Coons had trouble even hitting for nine bases. Indy had won the season series in 2069, 11-7. They had SP Justin Esch on the DL, probably for the entire year, due to a torn rotator cuff.

Projected matchups:
Jimmy Wharton (0-1, 2.70 ERA) vs. Miguel Lopez (0-1, 2.25 ERA)
Ian Lowry (0-0, 1.29 ERA) vs. Girolamo Pizzichini (0-1, 3.86 ERA)
Nick Walla (1-1, 5.25 ERA) vs. Victor Perez (0-2, 3.29 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (1-0, 0.00 ERA) vs. Mike DeWitt (1-0, 7.20 ERA)

DeWitt was the only southpaw for this series. J.P. Gallo got a day off in the opener. Katzman was scheduled for Friday.

Game 1
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Katzman – RF Corral – CF T. Wharton – C Flowe – 1B Fumero – SS Mireles – 3B Jalomo – P J. Wharton
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – C A. Gomez – 1B M. Rogers – 3B Ma. Martin – RF T. Torres – SS Leggett – 2B G. Lujan – P Mi. Lopez

Both teams only had a single the first time through the order, Fumero doing the honors for the Portland Pathetics, but Katzman hit a single to lead off the fourth inning, and the Raccoons looked in business when Lopez walked Jose Corral. Big Wharton popped out, though, but Jake Flowe showed signs of a pulse and hit an RBI single to right-center for the first run in the game. Fumero hit another single to load the bases, and then was doubled off, 3-U, when Josh Mireles lined out to Matt Rogers. Awesome!

That 1-0 score was the extent of offensive success for the two teams through five innings. Jimmyboy gave up three singles through five shutout innings, although Humphries and Tyler Wharton both had some work to do with long fly balls given up by the youngster. Top 6th, and the Coons had another fat scoring chance when Corral led off with a single and Ty Wharton doubled to left, putting the pair in scoring position with nobody out. Flowe hit a sac fly, Fumero popped out, and Mireles whiffed, which was apparently as good as it was gonna get right now. From Jimmy Wharton’s side then, walking Matt Rogers and giving up a homer to Matt Martin then just like that wiped the entire lead in the bottom 6th. While that hardly shocked me, my jaw *did* unhinge when Jimmy Wharton replied with a home run off Rodolfo Zea in the seventh inning, giving himself a new 3-2 lead. Humphries reached on an error and Katzman walked after that, but both were left stranded when Corral whiffed and Big Wharton flew out to Malcolm Spicer, one of many ex-Coons on that Indy roster, another one of which, Wally Leggett, got on base with a single to begin the bottom 7th, but was stranded by Jimmyboy, who was done after seven. Morejon batted for him with Flowe and Mireles on the corners and two outs in the eighth, but popped out against Zea.

Between McMahan, who allowed a single to PH Eddie Menchaca, and Victor Ramirez, who was taken deep by Matt Martin with two outs, the Raccoons then instantly blew the lead in the bottom of the eighth inning, instead entering the ninth trailing and facing Shamar King. Humphries drew a leadoff walk and was doubled off by Katzman, and Corral flew out to Tony Torres to end the game. 4-3 Indians. Flowe 2-3, 2 RBI; Fumero 2-4; J. Wharton 7.0 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 4 K and 1-3, HR, RBI;

Game 2
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Fumero – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF van Otterdijk – 1B Morejon – SS Mireles – C Jalomo – P Lowry
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – 1B M. Rogers – 3B Ma. Martin – RF T. Torres – SS G. Lujan – C M. Reed – 2B Leggett – P Pizzichini

Friday’s game was scoreless through three innings as well, with Lowry yet to give up a base hit. The Coons had three and Tyler Wharton managed to strand Humphries and Fumero on base with a lazy fly out in the third inning, but J.P. Gallo then went deep to right to begin the fourth and the Raccoons were up 1-0. This became 2-0 when van Otterdijk immediately hit another homer to left! Jerry Morejon singled, Mireles popped out, but Willie Jalomo then ended an 0-for-17 run to begin the season with an RBI double to center, 3-0. He was left on base, but the Coons tacked on a run in the fifth when Wharton doubled and then scored on productive outs (!) by Gallo and the Otter.

Lowry walked a pair in the fourth inning, but those runners remained stranded. The Indians did get him, kinda, for a run in the fifth inning when Guillermo Lujan singled, stole second, and eventually scored on a 2-out wild pitch… The Raccoons’ starter would get through seven innings, albeit with the contact getting louder in the last few frames. However, the defense held together and the Indians never got a hit besides that Lujan single that led to the run across those seven innings. The Coons got the 9-1-2 batters out with Jason Holzmeister in the eighth inning, then had Pedro Valentin clean up in the ninth, although he did allow a double to Matt Martin to give the Indians a second base hit. 4-1 Raccoons. Humphries 2-4, BB, 2B; Fumero 2-5; Katzman (PH) 1-1; Lowry 7.0 IP, 1 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 4 BB, 2 K, W (1-0);

The Raccoons have yet to score more than five runs in a game, and they did that only once.

Game 3
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – C Flowe – SS Mireles – 1B D. Gomez – P Walla
IND: CF Hilario – SS G. Lujan – 1B M. Rogers – 3B Ma. Martin – RF T. Torres – LF McInnis – C M. Reed – 2B Leggett – P V. Perez

Humphries singled his way on base to begin the Saturday game and was doubled off by Katzman, so the offense was truly humming. Nick Walla then walked Rogers in the first inning, five days removed from drowning in a 5-walk inning against Atlanta, although I also couldn’t recall a Coons pitcher getting Rogers out so far in this series… Walla then gave up a run on Torres and Leggett doubles in the second inning, which was not great either, and seemed to be behind in the count a lot. Humphries pulled the scores even with an unearned 2-out RBI double in the third inning, driving home Mireles after Matt Martin had dropped a previous foul pop by Humphries to allow him to stay in the box. Perez then rung up Katzman. Walla walked Rogers again in the bottom 3rd, but see my remarks before for how good we were doing against Rogers as a whole (in fact, at this point, he was “only” 5-for-10 in reaching base in the series, but it sure felt like 10-for-5).

Big Wharton singled to lead off the fourth and then was caught stealing before Mark Reed committed a 2-base throwing error on Gallo’s infield roller. That free runner was left on base of course on a grounder by Corral and Flowe popping out. Tony Torres hit a leadoff double and scored on two productive outs in the bottom 4th, 2-1 Indy, and I just didn’t like how Walla was looking, although he would end up finishing seven innings without allowing another run or walk. He struck out only three against two walks and four hits in this oddly incompetent looking contest, and was of course still 2-1 behind.

He was taken off the hook in the eighth though when Katz socked his third homer of the year off Tim Tennant, so there was that! Wharton then legged out an infield single and Tennant gave up another bomb to J.P. Gallo, and suddenly the Coons were on top, 4-2! We then brought in Gabriel Rios in a double switch (Otal in, Corral out) for what could potentially be a 6-out save against a heavily left-handed lineup. He gave up a leadoff single to Jose Hilario in the bottom 8th, but the runner never got off first base as the 2-3-4 batters made outs. In the ninth, he struck out Torres and Miguel Medina before Mark Reed rushed a homer over the fence in right, cutting the lead down to one. Rios remained in to face the switch-hitting Leggett, and ended the game with a K! 4-3 Coons. Humphries 2-5, 2B, RBI; T. Wharton 3-4;

This result dropped the Indians into last place, seven months after they had won the division.

Game 4
POR: LF Humphries – 3B Fumero – 2B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – 1B Morejon – SS Mireles – C Jalomo – P Gaytan
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – C A. Gomez – 1B M. Rogers – 3B Ma. Martin – RF T. Torres – SS G. Lujan – 2B Leggett – P M. DeWitt

DeWitt struck out three in the first inning, but also allowed a double to Fumero and a walk to Katzman, who were left on base. Gaytan struck out three of the first five batters he faced, while Malcolm Spicer singled his way on and was caught stealing, then nailed consecutive Indians, Torres and Lujan, with 2-out, 2-strike pitches in the second inning, which annoyed me greatly, but at least Leggett didn’t lob one out after that and instead popped out easily to Wharton in shallow center.

Gaytan finally (?) gave up his first homer of the year to Matt Rogers (…) in the fourth inning, which took him 18.2 innings to do on the new season, and put him in a 1-0 hole. The Coons were stirring for the first time since the opening frame in the fifth when they slowly loaded the bases with Mireles (walk), Jalomo (single), and Humphries (walk), but then there were two outs already. Fumero, batting .400, punched out. Instead Hilario drove in an unearned run when Wharton dropped a Leggett fly for a 2-base error in the bottom 5th, and the Indians were up 2-0.

DeWitt looked like he had this game in the bag. He got his 10th K against Jalomo to end the seventh inning, but only added one more against Gaytan in the eighth before being lifted. Tennant retired Humphries and Fumero, and Gaytan pitched eight innings in awaiting a complete-game loss, as with a 2-0 score the Indians sent Shamar King after the 3-4-5 batters. Katz grounded out to Martin, but Wharton singled to right, at least bringing up the tying run. Corral batted for the Otter and walked in a full count, and the Morejon **** into a 6-4-3 double play and flushed the rally. 2-0 Indians. Morejon 2-4; Gaytan 8.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 5 K, L (1-1);

(whiny noises)

Raccoons (5-8) @ Loggers (7-4) – April 21-23, 2070

The Loggers were in first place and scored more than twice as many runs as the Raccoons per game, which was probably all you didn’t want to know. Their pitching was even up to snuff so far, allowing the second-fewest runs in the league and they had a +26 run differential from just 11 games, so I really don’t know why the **** we came here in the first place. The Loggers had a 5-year run of winning the season series against the Coons, 11-7 in 2069.

Projected matchups:
Vinny Morales (0-2, 14.09 ERA) vs. Danny Ortiz (1-0, 5.73 ERA)
Jimmy Wharton (0-1, 2.63 ERA) vs. Curt Green (2-0, 4.26 ERA)
Ian Lowry (1-0, 1.29 ERA) vs. Julio Robles (0-0, 21.60 ERA)

We were not entirely sure why Robles, a casual back-end starter at the best of times, who had gotten bombed in his sole relief outing of the year, was lining up for a start here. Probably a tease. All three were right-handed.

Game 1
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – 1B Morejon – SS Mireles – C Flowe – P Morales
MIL: SS Van Leeuwen – RF Da. Wright – LF C. Dominguez – C M. Rodriguez – 1B C. Ramirez – 2B F. Carrera – CF Parrish – 3B Di. Mendoza – P D. Ortiz

Jake Flowe homered after Mireles had already driven in Gallo for the game’s first run in the second inning, so the Coons had a 3-0 lead in the early going against the Loggers, who in turn faced Vinny Morales, who had yet to give up fewer than six runs in an outing this year. He retired four in a row before Cesar Ramirez singled, but the runner was doubled off on a 4-6-3 grounder by Fidel Carrera. Top 3rd, and Humphries and Katzman reached the corners leading off with a double and a single, respectively, but Wharton popped out to the shortstop Sean Van Leeuwen. Gallo hit an RBI single to center, but Corral and Morejon grounded out and didn’t get any additional runners home.

Dave Wright doubled to center to begin the bottom 4th for the Loggers and Carlos Dominguez hit a single to right immediately after that. Manuel Rodriguez bounced a comebacker right to Morales with runners on the corners, and Morales, who had gotten a Gold Glove last year, turned a 1-6-3 double play with it while scaring Wright back to third base. Ramirez then grounded out to Katzman, leaving the runner stranded. On to the fifth, where the Coons reached their high water mark for offense and knocked out Ortiz with hits from Humphries, Wharton, and Gallo, who got another RBI and led the team with a paltry eight. When lefty Jorge Quinones replaced the starter, the Coons sent van Otterdijk to bat for Corral in a bid to go for the throat. The Otter singled in two runs to get the Coons to SEVEN for the game, but was then left on base.

Morales cruised through six innings on three hits, but the Coons got flustered when Dominguez and Rodriguez hit singles to begin the bottom 7th and sent McMahan for the left-handed 5-6-7 batters. Ramirez hit a bloop single and John Parrish hit an RBI infield single, but in between and afterwards Carrera and Diego Mendoza made poor outs. When right-handed Casey Ramsey then pinch-hit, the Coons sent Nava, who got another pop to Katzman to strand three runners in a 7-1 game. The run was then pulled back against long-ago Coon Ramon Carreno when Mireles tripled and scored on Flowe’s sac fly in the eighth. That was the final run of the game, as the Coons then got scoreless innings from Gutierrez and Ramirez on the way out. 8-1 Furballs. Humphries 2-5, 2B; Gallo 2-3, BB, 2B, 2 RBI; van Otterdijk (PH) 1-2, 2 RBI; Mireles 3-4, 3B, RBI; Otal (PH) 1-1; Morales 6.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 7 K, W (1-2);

EIGHT runs in ONE game!! (snout hangs open)

Julio Robles then pitched in the middle game against Jimmyboy.

Game 2
POR: LF Humphries – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – 2B Fumero – 1B Morejon – C Flowe – P J. Wharton
MIL: RF Da. Wright – SS Van Leeuwen – LF C. Dominguez – C M. Rodriguez – 1B C. Ramirez – 2B F. Carrera – 3B Di. Mendoza – CF Parrish – P Ju. Robles

Humphries singled, Big Wharton walked, and Corral dropped an RBI single behind Van Leeuwen for a 1-0 lead in the first, but Fumero then grounded out to leave two on. Van Leeuwen then hit a double off Jimmyboy, but was left on. Tyler Wharton hit a solo homer to right in the third inning to make it 2-0, then joined Humphries in hitting singles in the fifth inning. One double steal later they were in scoring position, and Gallo got a run home with a grounder to second, while Robles, who was on five strikeouts, had Corral at 0-2 and then nicked him for another 2-out runner, but then did succeed in striking out Fumero. Fidel Carrera’s leadoff single in the bottom 5th was then only the second Loggers hit off Jimmy Wharton, who got a double play grounder from Diego Mendoza to clean up. John Parrish flew out to left to end the inning.

The Raccoons extended their lead in the sixth inning when Flowe doubled to right with one out, and then advanced on a wild pitch. Robles inexplicably walked Jimmy Wharton, then gave up the Flowe run on a grounder by Humphries, 4-0. Robles got Katz on a fly, then was hit for with Ramsey to begin the bottom 6th. The pinch-hitter doubled, Wright singled, and Van Leeuwen struck out against Jimmyboy while Wright stole second. Carlos Dominguez got a run home with a groundout, but Fumero made a nifty play on Rodriguez’ grounder to end the inning, with Team Wharton still up 4-1.

Things then got even stickier in the seventh with Ramirez and Carrera singles. Jimmy Wharton was yanked when he nicked Parrish to load the bags with one out. Nava came in as the fire brigade again, had PH Mario Alaniz at 1-2, and then gave up a screamer to left – but Humphries got there to make the catch. Ramirez went for home – and a ZINGER beat him to the plate, bang-bang play and the umpire brought the fist down to end the inning…!! Nava was retained to bunt in the eighth after Fumero and Morejon hit singles off Neil Mongillo and Flowe struck out. Humphries hit an RBI single to left with two outs, but now this inning also ended at the plate as Dominguez threw out Morejon there.

Between Nava and Rios we sat down the Loggers’ 1-2-3 batters in order in the bottom 8th, and B.J. Butrico got three straight outs against Portland in the ninth before we gave the 5-1 lead to Edgar Gutierrez. Manuel Rodriguez singled right away, while Ramirez flew out to Otal in center. When Carrera singled, the save was on and Valentin replaced the Mexican rookie, but Diego Mendoza doubled through Gallo to get the runners home. Parrish whiffed, but PH Vince Shapiro legged out a soft single to put the tying runs on the corners with two outs and turn the lineup over again. Wright went down on strikes to end the game…! 5-3 Raccoons. Humphries 3-5, 2 RBI; T. Wharton 2-4, BB, HR, RBI; Morejon 2-4; J. Wharton 6.1 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, W (1-1);

Look, boys, what you can achieve by scoring more than three ******* runs a game!

Game 3
POR: LF Humphries – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – 2B Fumero – C Flowe – 1B Gomez – P Lowry
MIL: SS Van Leeuwen – RF Da. Wright – LF C. Dominguez – 1B C. Ramirez – 2B F. Carrera – CF Parrish – C Guitreau – 3B Di. Mendoza – P C. Green

Straight base runners to begin the game from a Humphries single, Katzman walking, and a Wharton single to center gave the Raccoons a run before they made an out, but the 4-5-6 then made straight outs that were not helpful in getting a second run home. Flowe and Dan Gomez singled to begin the second and were bunted onwards by Lowry, after which Humphries got a run home with a groundout, but another base knock wasn’t in the cards, and Katzman flew out to Parrish in center. Parrish drew a walk in the bottom 2nd and Tommy Guitreau came a bit too close to a game-tying homer for my taste, but Corral picked the rocket off the top of the fence. Fumero singled in an unearned runner with Gallo in the third, as Dave Wright hadn’t been able to make up his mind whether he wanted to dive for Gallo’s looper or play it on the bounce, and instead took it off the chest for two bases.

The trouble for Lowry started in the bottom 3rd with a leadoff walk to Curt Green, from which he almost didn’t make it back with a lead, as the Loggers then quickly piled on three hits with Van Leeuwen, Dominguez, and Carrera, and the latter two each drove in a run to narrow the score to 3-2. Parrish flew out to a running Humphries to end the inning. The Coons continued to score in every inning, though, even though they only reached with two outs on a Humphries double to left in the fourth. Katzman singled him home with a liner over the glove of the shortstop, but Wharton’s long fly was rushed down by Parrish to end the inning.

The scoring string then did end, and a 4-2 lead was as good as tie with these Loggers. Lowry wasn’t pitching badly, but he gave up a single to Carrera and an RBI double to Guitreau with two outs in the sixth and that narrowed the score to one run again. Diego Mendoza was then brushed by a pitch and Lowry had to ring up Vince Shapiro to get out of the inning.

Gallo went yard off Mongillo in the seventh to tack on a run again, and the 5-3 lead went to Rios in the bottom 7th, but now the bottom tried to fall out of the barrel. Rios nicked Wright with one out, Dominguez singled, and then Fumero fumbled Ramirez’ grounder to load the bases. While Rios buggered out of there by getting pop outs on the infield from Alaniz and Parrish, he didn’t do so without Flowe letting a ball escape between his legs to concede a run on a passed ball… Gallo for the second straight inning then tacked on another run after Humphries and Katzman reached. Wharton forced out the latter with a grounder to short, but Gallo got Mongillo for an RBI single to left-center, 6-4. Mireles then batted for Rios in Corral’s deserted spot and struck out. Holzmeister handled the eighth, which included Diego Mendoza flying out on 3-0 pitch to help out. The ninth brought more drama instead, as Valentin got Van Leeuwen to ground out, but then walked Wright and Fumero made another error on Dominguez’ grounder. Ramirez flew out easily, but Casey Ramsey strung an RBI double to left, and any other runner but Dominguez would have been sent home with the tying run, but the Loggers had to stop him at third base. The .180 hitter Parrish then ended the game with a 3-run homer to right. 8-6 Loggers. Humphries 3-5, 2 2B, RBI; Gallo 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; Flowe 2-5, 2B;

Fumero had three singles, but cost five unearned runs with his defensive *************. Good job.

Raccoons (7-9) @ Condors (5-11) – April 25-27, 2070

Tijuana sat eighth in runs scored and had allowed the second-most runs so far in the CL. Their -25 run differential was worse than the Coons’ (-13), and they were near the very bottom in speed, defense, and especially starters’ ERA. Ace of Aces Jason Brenize was on the DL this week still, as was reliever Jason Reed. Josh Rugar was hitting .242 with five homers, and nobody else in that lineup had more than one. The Critters had won this season series in every even year going back to 2046, but the Condors had won it in every odd season going back to 2063, 5-4 last year.

Projected matchups:
Nick Walla (2-1, 4.26 ERA) vs. Luis Renteria (1-2, 8.36 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (1-1, 0.39 ERA) vs. TBD
Vinny Morales (1-2, 8.56 ERA) vs. Ryan Mann (2-1, 4.79 ERA)

Renteria and Mann were right-handed. The middle spot would have been rookie Brian Kauffman, but he was suspended for the duration of this series, and we’d have to see how the Condors would patch things up.

The Coons made a roster move, returning Dan Gomez (.222, 0 HR, 0 RBI) to AAA for Jacob Davis, who this time might even get into a game before Adam Yocum came off the DL on Sunday.

Game 1
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – C Flowe – SS Mireles – 1B Morejon – P Walla
TIJ: 2B M. Roberts – SS M. Moreno – 1B D. Cline – CF Rugar – C Brann – 3B D. Rodriguez – LF Schreiber – RF J. Elliott – P Renteria

Humphries and Katzman reached base to begin the game, but it took a Corral single with two outs to get a run home, and Flowe’s groundout then stranded a pair. Nothing major happened until the top of the order was batting again for Portland, and the 1-2 were on base again to begin the top of the third. They pulled off a double steal, then scored together on a Wharton single. Chris Schreiber’s throw home allowed Wharton to second base, but so would have the four-pitch walk that Gallo drew. Corral grounded out, Flowe popped out, but Josh Mireles dished a ball into the gap for a 2-out, 2-run double, and a 5-0 lead in the game. Morejon, batting .171 with no RBI’s, was walked intentionally to get a K on Walla and end the inning, and Renteria was yanked in the bottom 3rd for PH J.D. Johnson, who drew a walk off Walla, who was still being watched curiously. Schreiber had begun the inning with a double, but Mike Roberts wrapped up the frame with a double play grounder.

Humph and Katz then reached base together for the third straight time in four innings when lefty David Mundell walked both of them in the fourth. Wharton’s single loaded the bases, and Gallo’s single plated Humphries. Corral scored a run, but for the cost of a 4-6-3 double play. Mundell walked Flowe, but Mireles then flew out to Schreiber. An error by Jake Elliott then put Morejon on base to begin the fifth. Walla singled on an 0-2 pitch, and Humphries drew another walk to load the bases. Katz doubled home two to send Mundell packing. Pat Bidwell then shut down the 3-4-5 batters hard to keep the score at 9-0.

Walla was nursing a 2-hitter on a reasonable pitch count through six, but the sparkle wasn’t there. He only whiffed three through six. The Coons then replaced Humph and Wharton at the stretch given the 9-0 lead. Walla struck out two in the seventh, but the shutout burst with five outs remaining when Danny Rodriguez got hold of a pitch and barreled it over the wall in right. Walla allowed another single to Mario Moreno in the ninth, but apart from that finished the game undeterred for a 4-hitter on 98 pitches! 9-1 Furballs! Humphries 1-2, 3 BB; Katzman 2-3, 2 BB, 2B, 2 RBI; T. Wharton 3-5, 2 RBI; Walla 9.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 5 K, W (3-1) and 1-5;

I am still not seeing 2068 Walla, but he looked a lot better than at the start of the season. It was enough at least to be named BNN’s Player of the Day.

Ryan Mann got the ball on short rest on Saturday, while Jacob Davis was ill with an earache. Maybe he wasn’t gonna get into a game after all.

Game 2
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF van Otterdijk – C Flowe – SS Mireles – 1B Morejon – P Gaytan
TIJ: 3B D. Rodriguez – SS M. Moreno – 1B D. Cline – CF Rugar – C Brann – LF J. Jenkins – 2B Vidrio – RF J. Elliott – P Mann

The Condors burst out for four runs against Gaytan in the first inning as Moreno singled, David Cline walked, and with two outs Mike Brann hit an RBI single and Jeremy Jenkins socked a 3-run homer. Gaytan reeled himself in after that, but the damage was done, and the Coons didn’t get as much as a single for four innings against Mann, who was positively wild and walked three, but also struck out five. Mireles slapped a leadoff single in the fifth inning, but was doubled up, and it was gonna be one of *those* games.

Gaytan did *fine* until he suddenly gave up three hits and two runs in quick succession in the seventh inning, but the Raccoons by then still were sat on that Mireles single and nothing else. The Raccoons would never get another hit, and for the game ended up drawing five walks and striking out ten times while drowning without making too many bubbles on the surface. 6-0 Condors.

Adam Yocum did not come off the DL as hoped for on Sunday, so Jacob Davis remained on the roster and who knows, maybe he can become the running gag this year. Called up six times, never got the uniform dirty.

We were up against left-hander Bryan Farris (0-0, 2.77 ERA) on Southpaw Sunday.

Game 3
POR: LF Humphries – 1B Fumero – 2B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – 3B Gallo – SS Mireles – C Jalomo – P Morales
TIJ: 2B M. Roberts – 3B D. Rodriguez – 1B D. Cline – CF Rugar – C Brann – LF J. Jenkins – SS Vidrio – RF J. Elliott – P Farris

The Coons disappeared for the minimum the first time through as Mireles drew a walk and was doubled up by Willie Jalomo, while Vinny Morales issued a walk in each of the first two innings, but didn’t allow a run; he just escalated his limited pitch count early on, needing 47 tosses through three innings. Neither side had a hit after three, in fact.

Humphries walked and then Fumero doubled to left to begin the fourth and put a pair in scoring position. Farris walked Katz in a full count, which brought up Wharton with three on and (sigh) nobody out. He got a run home with a slow grounder to third that had Rodriguez rush in, and then his only play was at first base. The Otter walked the reload the bases, and then the Condors lost Gallo’s sodden grounder on the infield for an RBI infield single. Farris walked in a run against Mireles, 3-0, but then struck out Jalomo and brought up the pitcher with two outs, a duel that ended with a bases-clearing double and Farris getting yanked from the game. Mundell replaced him, walked Humphries, and then got Fumero to pop out, ending a 6-run inning.

Mundell would pitch two innings across three actual frames, hit a single off Morales in the bottom 5th, but then gave up a solo homer to Mireles in the sixth. From there he packed the bases with Humphries, Fumero, and Katz, and two outs, and then had Wharton, who had hit into a double play against him the last time up, at 1-2 before hanging one, and you can’t hang one to Tyler Wharton. GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAND SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMM!!!

Morales was done after six innings of 2-hit, but 5-walk ball that pretty much got him to 100 pitches. Jacob David batted for him and grounded out against Harry Facteau in the seventh, then replaced Katz at second base for the rest of the game. Gutierrez got four outs after Morales left, and McMahan and Holzmeister both allowed a hit and got one more out in a gooey eighth, but the Condors were kept off the board until Mario Moreno hit a pinch-hit RBI single off Danny Nava when they were down to their final out in the ninth inning. Danny Rodriguez flew out to center to end the game. 11-1 Furballs. Humphries 0-1, 4 BB; Fumero 3-5, 2B; T. Wharton 1-5, HR, 5 RBI; Morales 6.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 5 BB, 4 K, W (2-2) and 1-3, 2B, 3 RBI;

In other news

April 18 – 23-year-old TIJ SP Bryan Farris (0-0, 0.00 ERA) no-hits the Aces for eight innings on his ABL debut, leaving in a 1-1 tie (both runs unearned) before the Aces claim a 3-1 win on their only base hit, a walkoff home run by 2B/SS Carlos Cervantez (.237, 2 HR, 8 RBI) off Condors closer Tyler Reed (0-1, 3.18 ERA).
April 18 – Rebs OF Juan Licona (.372, 1 HR, 7 RBI) sees his 27-game hitting streak end with an 0-for-5 outing against the Blue Sox. The rest of the team does hit though and takes a 7-3 win.
April 18 – Knights INF Jorge Munoz (.265, 0 HR, 3 RBI) could be out until June with an oblique strain.
April 18 – Sacramento kills the Stars with a 10-run first inning and then cruises to a 16-3 win. DAL SP Juan Sanchez (1-1, 10.29 ERA) retires none of the eight batters he faces, all of whom score. SAC OF/2B/SS Mike Pinault (.324, 3 HR, 16 RBI) drives in seven runs with three walks and three hits, including two homers *in the first inning*.
April 19 – ATL OF Jorge Soto (.396, 0 HR, 2 RBI) is expected to miss a month on account of a herniated disc.
April 19 – The Condors beat the Aces, 3-2 in 14 innings, despite being out-hit in the game, 15-8.
April 19 – The Bayhawks beat the Knights, 7-6 in 16 innings, on a walkoff home run by C Hugo Valdez (.256, 2 HR, 9 RBI), after no runs had been scored since the sixth inning.

April 20 – A home run by VAN RF/LF Roberto Lozada (.275, 3 HR, 8 RBI) beats the Crusaders, 1-0.
April 23 – SFW SP Matthew Stratford (1-1, 3.21 ERA) is expected to miss two months from an oblique strain.
April 23 – The Stars score *15* runs in the third inning to thoroughly erase an early 6-0 lead for Los Angeles, and end up winning a 23-11 smasher. DAL 1B/3B/OF Dallas Stockton (.280, 6 HR, 22 RBI) drives in eight runs with a grand slam, 3-run homer, and sac fly, while DAL 3B/2B/LF/RF Mike Baird (.231, 0 HR, 12 RBI) drives in five more on two doubles.
April 23 – The Falcons are taken apart by the Knights in an 18-1 rout. ATL C Justin Hart (.460, 5 HR, 27 RBI) goes 4-for-6 with a homer, two doubles, and seven RBI to lead the charge.
April 23 – The Titans acquire catcher Curt Goodwin (.300, 0 HR, 10 RBI) and a prospect from the Stars for outfielder Jake Evans (.400, 1 HR, 3 RBI).

April 24 – SFW SP Sean Ranney (1-1, 5.48 ERA) could miss four months after having bone chips removed from his elbow.
April 25 – The first career hit of Miners RF/LF Nate Holcomb (.167, 1 HR, 1 RBI) is a 14th-inning walkoff home run to beat the Scorpions, 4-3.

Player of the Week 2 (FL): SAC OF/2B/SS Mike Pinault (.357, 4 HR, 17 RBI), hitting .412 (7-17) with 3 HR, 10 RBI
Player of the Week 2 (CL): BOS OF Eddie Marcotte (.333, 2 HR, 9 RBI), going .414 (12-29) with 2 HR, 6 RBI

Player of the Week 3 (FL): WAS 2B Andy Ratliff (.448, 1 HR, 16 RBI), hitting .450 (9-20) with 1 HR, 6 RBI
Player of the Week 3 (CL): VAN C/1B Jonathan Contreras (.414, 2 HR, 16 RBI), clipping .500 (12-24) with 1 HR, 10 RBI

Complaints and stuff

The Stars scored 23 runs in a day. The Coons can’t score 23 in a ******* week!!

Okay, things got markedly better in the last week here, and while we’re still far away from scoring even four runs per game, the Coons put out 39 markers against the Loggers and Condors, or 6.5 per game. I can work with that!

Yocum’s return on Tuesday after another off day should also help with densening the lineup a bit more, and then we’ll try to find solutions for all the bats that aren’t working; catchers, Morejon, van Otterdijk…

After the off day on Monday, we finish the long road trip with a 3-game set in Oklahoma, and then it’s home for a 7-game homestand against the Elks and Crusaders. Most of our games in May are at home, with only nine road games scheduled, and none of them East of Oklahoma.

Fun Fact: The Raccoons will not play a game East of the Mississippi for eight full weeks.

This goes from the Condors series we just played straight through to June 19, the middle of a Buffos/Titans road trip. Of course we then get to make three separate cross-country trips in the next five weeks after that.

[Westheim]

Monday was off and on Tuesday the Raccoons activated Adam Yocum and sent Jacob Davis, who had gone 0-for-2 on Sunday, back to AAA for the second time this month.

Raccoons (9-10) @ Thunder (10-8) – April 29-May 1, 2070

The Thunder had gotten off to a slow start despite allowing only three runs per game, the best rate in the CL. They had the fourth-fewest runs scored, but a +9 run differential. The pen had been pretty lousy, but the rotation had a 2.34 ERA. The Coons had lost the season series last year, 5-4, the sixth straight year where the Thunder had maintained the upper hand.

Projected matchups:
Jimmy Wharton (1-1, 2.25 ERA) vs. Jose Aguilar (1-1, 2.01 ERA)
Ian Lowry (1-0, 2.25 ERA) vs. Chris Monahan (0-0, 0.69 ERA)
Nick Walla (3-1, 3.21 ERA) vs. Ken Nielsen (2-0, 1.53 ERA)

Yikes, those ERA’s. Aguilar was left-handed to begin the series.

Game 1
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Fumero – 3B Gallo – RF van Otterdijk – C Jalomo – P J. Wharton
OCT: CF J. Reyes – SS Palominos – RF Bonner – C Bohannon – 2B C. Gutierrez – LF D. Perez – 1B Jim White – 3B B. Robinson – P J. Aguilar

The Coons did not get on base in the first couple of innings, but a bloop single by Martin Bohannon, another soft single by Jim White, and Brian Robinson hanging an elbow into a breaking ball loaded the bases for the Thunder in the bottom 2nd. That brought up Aguilar with two outs though and Jimmyboy put him away with no fuss to strand all three runners. Aguilar went on to sit down a full dozen straight on the brown team before Bohannon got Jimmy Wharton for a solo home run in the fourth inning; and Jose Palominos doubled home Aguilar, who hit a scratch single in the fifth inning to double the Thunder’s lead to 2-0.

The threat of a perfect game became real after the Coons also reached through six innings, the sixth ending on a sliding grab by Danny Perez on a looper to shallow left hit by Jimmyboy. The game was out the window for good in that inning, when Wharton allowed three more runs – all unearned for a pair of errors made by Fumero and Big Wharton; and then Aguilar walked Humphries to begin the seventh. Aguilar rung up Yocum, but then slipped singles to Katz and Big Wharton, but Fumero then hit into a double play with the bases loaded, because of course he did. The Coons did not threaten in the eighth, which was Aguilar’s last inning before Brian Doster came on for the ninth, allowed a pinch-hit single to Benito Otal and a pinch-hit homer to Jerry Morejon to get the Coons on the board. Steve Keller replaced Doster and put the lid on. 5-2 Thunder. Morejon (PH) 1-1, 2 RBI; Otal (PH) 1-1;

Game 2
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – 1B Morejon – P Lowry
OCT: CF J. Reyes – SS Palominos – 1B I. Stone – RF D. Perez – C Bohannon – LF Thore – 2B C. Gutierrez – 3B B. Robinson – P Nielsen

Lowry allowed three singles to Palominos, Perez, and Bohannon, who drove in the game’s first run, in the bottom 1st, and the traffic wasn’t gonna get any lighter from there. The Thunder had two more singles in the second, and Lowry leaked a leadoff walk in the third, but none of those runners came around to score. The Raccoons had a hard time getting going again, but in the fourth Katzman singled and Wharton walked to begin the inning, putting some bodies on base. Corral was done 0-2 before bouncing a single through the right side, loading the bags with nobody out. Gallo then rolled a ball near the first base line that Nielsen made a dash for, but he looked home, only to find Katzman already sliding in, and by the time he spun around, Gallo was already rumbling into first base – infield single and a tied game, and the bags were still full. Flowe hit a solid RBI single to center, and Morejon drove in a pair for the second time in two days with a single to left-center. The Thunder yanked Nielsen right there and then, and lefty Chris Hale shut the Raccoons down hard, retiring the 9-1-2 for poor outs and no more runs.

The Coons hit into double plays in the next two innings, but the Thunder got nobody on against Lowry anymore in the middle innings. Doster was back in the game in the seventh, walked Lowry, allowed a single to Humph, and then left with an injury. Luis Ramirez then got a fly to center from Yocum and Katzman grounded into the third double play in three innings. Of course things then swung the other way. Lowry issued two more walks and gave up a 2-out, 2-run triple to Jon Reyes in the bottom 7th that narrowed the score to 4-3, although the Coons then came right back with a 2-out single and stolen base by Gallo off Jon McGinley, and then Flowe plated him with another single in the eighth, 5-3. The Otter batted for Morejon and doubled, but Flowe was not going to score from first, and then Fumero pinch-hit and struck out.

Bottom 8th, and the Coons shuffled the bags full by various means, as McMahan put a runner on when Ian Stone singled, Nava put on Coby Thore with another single, and then Gallo put a runner on when he ****** Carlos Gutierrez’ 2-out grounder for an error. Rios came in to face the left-handed hitting Brian Robinson, but the Thunder sent right-hander Victor Talavera (who?) instead. The bench warmer grounded out to Gallo, who didn’t dare fudge another one, and the inning ended. Valentin put the game away quickly in the ninth at least. 5-3 Raccoons. Humphries 2-4, BB; Gallo 4-4, RBI; Flowe 2-4, 2 RBI; van Otterdijk (PH) 1-1, 2B;

Pitching change for the rubber game, as we instead got up against Danny Baca (2-0, 4.21 ERA), who was left-handed.

Game 3
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – 3B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Fumero – SS Mireles – RF van Otterdijk – C Jalomo – P Walla
OCT: CF J. Reyes – SS Palominos – 1B I. Stone – RF D. Perez – C Bohannon – LF Thore – 2B C. Gutierrez – 3B B. Robinson – P D. Baca

The Raccoons got to score first in the rubber game, getting Yocum and Katzman on with first-inning singles, and into scoring position on a weird throw to third base by Jon Reyes that was never gonna get Yocum on Katz’ single. This led to an extra run as Wharton plated Yocum with a groundout, but Fumero also got Katzman home with a scratch single with two outs. Mireles then grounded out. Danny Perez took Walla deep in the bottom 1st though, knocking a 2-run homer with Reyes on third base.

The second inning was a massacre; first of all the Thunder whacked Walla for four singles and two more runs and took a 4-2 lead, but Baca, who drove in a run, injured himself running the bases, and the inning ended when Palominos lined into a 6-U double play on which Mireles tagged out the pinch-running reliever Jason Stine, but also got his shoulder pinned under the lard-assed left-hander’s knee and couldn’t move his arm afterwards, so he, too, left with Luis Silva. Morejon entered the game at first, with Fumero and Katz shuffling around the infield to fill all the spots.

Humph walked and Yocum singled to put the tying runs on the corners with nobody out in the third against Stine. Katz hit an RBI single, 4-3, but then Stine got three straight outs without letting that tying run across the plate. Walla meanwhile was beyond saving, gave up two more singles – although Perez was caught stealing – and then an unearned run on a Fumero throwing error in the bottom 3rd. Stine filled the bags with the Otter, Humph, and Yocum in the fourth, also two outs, but Katz lined out to short, while Walla allowed another three singles and a run and was yanked with two outs in the bottom 4th after allowing ELEVEN hits in 3.2 innings.

The Coons left two on in the sixth before Morejon homered off Chris Hale in the seventh to shorten the score to 6-4. This was followed by a single by van Otterdijk, and then Jalomo busting into a double play. Danny Perez homered off Holzmeister instead, who pitched two innings, but without much grace. Gutierrez gave up a leadoff double to Coby Thore in the eighth and then saw that runner score on an error by Morejon, then made it two by walking Mike Weber and giving up an RBI single to Reyes. Big Wharton hit a useless homer off Pedro Mendoza in the ninth, but no actual rally materialized only to be killed with a double play. 9-5 Thunder. Humphries 1-2, 3 BB; Yocum 2-4, BB; Katzman 2-5, RBI; T. Wharton 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; van Otterdijk 2-5;

Raccoons (10-12) vs. Canadiens (11-10) – May 2-4, 2070

Ugh. Elks. The smell! Also, they were third in the division, third in runs scored, and seventh in runs allowed. The Coons had eked out a 2-1 edge in the season series, but looked ready to blow that.

Projected matchups:
Tony Gaytan (1-2, 2.08 ERA) vs. Juan Rosado (1-3, 5.40 ERA)
Vinny Morales (2-2, 5.95 ERA) vs. Ricardo Montoya (4-0, 1.85 ERA)
Jimmy Wharton (1-2, 2.33 ERA) vs. Nick Waldron (3-1, 3.75 ERA)

Those were all right-handers, but the Elks had been off on Thursday, so they had wiggle room.

The Coons also placed Josh Mireles on the DL with a separated shoulder, which was unfortunate given that he was now actually hitting .318… Helll-lo, Jacob Davis.

Game 1
VAN: SS Barraza – CF D. Moore – RF Lozada – 1B An. Ramirez – LF Bustillos – 3B C. Castro – C J. Contreras – 2B Den. Wright – P J. Rosado
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – 1B Morejon – P Gaytan

Gaytan made even the $6.5M deal look bad in the first inning, allowing a first-pitch single to Juan Barraza, a walk to Dan Moore, and then a pair of bombs to Antonio Ramirez and John Bustillos for an instant 4-0 hole that the Coons weren’t gonna emerge from anymore. Humph singled and was doubled by Katz in the first, and Big Wharton walked and was doubled up by Corral in the second. Gaytan gave up another homer to Ramirez his second time up, and I was quietly suckling on the nearest bottle of Capt’n Coma.

Rosado then walked the bags full with Yocum, Wharton, and Corral in the bottom 4th, bringing up Gallo with one out, and still didn’t have himself reeled in. He walked Gallo on four pitches to force in a pity run, but then ******* Flowe poked into another ******* double play to kill the ******* inning. Bottom 5th, Gaytan doubled to left with one out. Humphries then immediately popped out, Yocum walked in a full count, and then Katz doubled in a pair to left and scored on Wharton’s soft single to narrow the score to 5-4.

Silly me was then thinking about how we’d turn this stupid game around until the bottom 7th when Gaytan was somehow still allowed to **** around on the hill and gave up a 1-out fly to center off the stick of PH Jeff Hawkins. Wharton ran it down and caught it sliding, but then came up limping. When Luis Silva emerged from the dugout, I started to bawl and hid under the pillows. Benito Otal replaced Wharton in center.

Fumero drew a leadoff walk off Josh Atkins in the seventh and was left on first base. Otal then drew a leadoff walk off Josh Atkins in the eighth and was left on first base. McMahan and Ramirez pitched scoreless innings against the Elks in the eighth and ninth to keep the game close so we could draw another leadoff walk in the ninth and leave that ******* runner stranded, too. But in fact the Coons made outs with pinch-hitters van Otterdijk and Jalomo and only then did Humph draw a 2-out walk from Elijah LaBat, who was 36 by now. He stole second, but Yocum’s groundout ended the game. 5-4 Canadiens. T. Wharton 1-1, 2 BB, RBI;

Luis Silva talked me off the ledge after the game by assuring me that Tyler Wharton had a mild knee sprain and wasn’t gonna need the DL, or an amputation. He was however out for the remainder of the weekend and probably until the middle of next week. Given the size of his boomstick, Wharton remained on the roster as dead weight for the time being. Between Humph, Otal, and Fumero there were enough centerfielders to go around.

Game 2
VAN: SS Barraza – CF D. Moore – RF Lozada – LF Bustillos – 3B C. Castro – C J. Contreras – 1B H. Moreno – 2B Den. Wright – P R. Montoya
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – RF Corral – SS Katzman – 3B Gallo – 1B Morejon – C Flowe – CF Otal – P Morales

Both teams scored a run in the first on Saturday, Katzman singling home Humphries to make up for Vinny Morales’ clumsy attempts at tossing that saw him hit Dan Moore, walked Lozada, and give up a run on a 2-out single as well, that one by Carlos Castro. Humph was back on base in the bottom 3rd, drawing a 1-out walk from the veteran right-hander Montoya. He was antsy to steal, but couldn’t get a jump until he ran while Yocum singled to right. Almost getting hit by the batted ball, he nevertheless bid for third base and woulda been out if Roberto Lozada’s throw hadn’t been off line. Castro had to chase after it, and Humphries turned third base and scored to give the Coons a 2-1 lead, with Yocum following into second base, but he was stranded. In the fourth, an error by Dennis Wright put Gallo on base leading off. He stole second, but then two indifferent outs were made by Morejon and Flowe. The Elks walked Otal intentionally, but then gave up an RBI single to Morales through the right side. Humphries grounded out to short to strand a pair.

After that flurry of activity, nobody else reached base until stretch time, then, as Vinny Morales gave up four hits early, but then sat down 11 straight Elks before giving up singles to the Robertos of Troubles, Barraza and Lozada, in the eighth, and those two represented the tying runs. McMahan replaced him against Bustillos and Castro, ran two full counts, rung up one, but walked the bags full on the other. Pedro Valentin then entered to face the .361 hitter Jonathan Contreras, had him at 2-2, and then gave up a long fly to right that made me shriek in terror as Corral was seen screaming just alike as he rushed back to the fence, made a leap – AND PULLED THE ******* THING DOWN!!! Inning over!

Yocum strung a leadoff double to left in the bottom 8th, which would hopefully become a tack-on run. Corral grounded out, which wasn’t the worst, and Josh Atkins then walked the bags full with Katz and Gallo. Fumero batted for Morejon against the left-hander, grounded out slowly to third base, but that at least allowed Yocum to score as Castro had to go to first for any out. Another run scored on a wild pitch before Jacob Davis grounded out. And then Valentin loaded the bases in the ninth. He struck out Hector Moreno, but then walked Wright, Ramirez singled, and he drilled Barraza. Moore singled in a run with a sharp whistler to left, and another run scored on a Lozada groundout. The tying runs were in scoring position, and the Coons twitched and sent Rios for Bustillos. The panic move worked and the slugger grounded out calmly. 5-3 Coons. Yocum 2-4, 2B; Morales 7.1 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 4 K, W (3-2) and 1-3, RBI;

There’s no easy game with this team, huh? Maud, I’ll have a soothing tea, maybe with some tranq, and how about two trays of chocolate chip muffins for Sunday?

Game 3
VAN: SS Barraza – LF J. Hawkins – CF D. Moore – 1B An. Ramirez – C J. Contreras – 3B C. Castro – RF Bustillos – 2B Den. Wright – P Waldron
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – CF Otal – SS Katzman – 3B Gallo – 1B Morejon – RF van Otterdijk – C Jalomo – P J. Wharton

I wanted this rubber game very badly (but I wanted every game against the damn Elks very badly). The weather looked like real trouble, and Jeff Hawkins hit a double right in the first, and then left the game with discomfort in his side and was replaced by Jose Alvarez, who had been on the Crusaders some years back. He scored on a Moore double, Wharton walked Ramirez, Contreras hit an RBI single, and then Castro found a double play, but we were already 2-0 in the hole. Humph and Yocum then went to the corners immediately with hits, but Otal popped out, Katzman forced out Yocum, and was then picked off first base by Waldron to end the inning, and I had half a muffin fall outta my snout.

The next two innings were so-so, with Wharton at one point ringing up four in a row, but also bunting into a double play after the one ******* time a fortnight where Willie Jalomo would reach base. The Coons then stuffed the bases with one out in the fourth as Katz doubled, Gallo walked, and Morejon singled softly to right, but there wasn’t a runner on this roster daring to try for home from second against Bustillos’ cannon. Van Otterdijk snapped an RBI single to right (and then repeat the last part of the previous sentence), and Jalomo sucked into a force at the plate for the second out. Wharton grounded out and remained 2-1 behind, but the bottom 5th began with Humph walking and Yocum finding left-center for a double. With two in scoring position and nobody out – … was I really getting my hopes up? Otal tied the game with a grounder, but Katzman popped out and Gallo flew out to center…

All that was for a 5-hit busted flush in the sixth inning as Barraza singled and Jose Alvarez homered off Wharton, who then allowed three more singles and another run to the damn Elks. Otter and Corral (batting for the dismissed Wharton) then hit singles in the bottom 6th, but of course nobody on this ******* team would get a 3-run homer to tie the game up again. Otal and Katz hit 1-out singles in the seventh, Gallo walked to fill the bases AGAIN, and then Morejon took a strike, and another, and … flicked a 2-run single to center. Moore threw home, didn’t get Katz, and allowed the tying and go-ahead runs into scoring position. Van Otterdijk whiffed, and you couldn’t let Jalomo flail there. Fumero pinch-hit, grounded out to first, and yet more precious runners were left ******* wasted. It was also raining by that point.

To add to the rage, Yocum hit a 2-out single against Oliver Graham in the eighth, stole second, and then was left on base by Otal. Holzmeister and Nava held the score together in the last two innings, while the Elks brought back LaBat for the ninth against the 4-5-6 batters. Katzman grounded out to third, but Gallo singled. Morejon’s groundout advanced him to second, and then with the game about to die, the pitcher’s spot came up, and we had to save our last twig on the bench for that opportunity, and it was Jacob Davis. He fouled away the first pitch, and then the umpire called a rain delay and I could totally see how the ******* Elks would win the rubber game in a rain-shortened game, with the Coons having the tying run on second while being down to their final out. I howled bloody murder, but the game actually resumed about 11 muffins or 40 minutes later. LaBat was still pitching, and Davis swatted his very next offering into the right-center gap – Bustillos could not get there, and it was down for a double, and the game was tied!!! Fumero then walked, and Flowe struck out, and we went to extras.

Victor Ramirez *immediately* gave up a run in the tenth, allowing singles to Barraza and Antonio Ramirez to give the Elks a new lead. LaBat was still going in the bottom 10th and got Humphries out, but Yocum and Katzman singled. Gallo was batting with two outs, hit a grounder to third, Castro grabbed it, flubbed it, and chased it into foul ground, and the bloody error kept the Coons alive. They were also in a terrible position, even if you ignored the 6-5 deficit given that behind Morejon was the pitcher’s spot. Even if Morejon tied the game, we were not gonna win it here. But Morejon didn’t tie the game – he ended it with a fly to center. A fly to center for some 430 bloody feet and a … (giddily claps his little sticky paws) – WALKOFF GRAAAAAAAND SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMM!!!! … 9-6 Furballs!!! Humphries 2-5, BB, 2B; Yocum 4-6, 2B; Katzman 3-6, 2B; Morejon 3-6, HR, 6 RBI; van Otterdijk 2-4, RBI; Davis (PH) 1-1, 2B, RBI; Corral (PH) 1-1;

In other news

April 28 – Boston backstop David Johnson (.237, 2 HR, 9 RBI) gets a single in a 7-6 loss to the Aces, which marks his 2,000th career hit. The 9-time All Star and 2-time Gold Glover got all but 192 of those hits with the Blue Sox.
April 30 – Indians CF/LF/3B/1B Matt Martin (.265, 3 HR, 12 RBI) would be out for the month after tearing a meniscus.
April 30 – The Falcons trade SP Jason Morea (1-1, 1.69 ERA) to the Warriors for OF Adam Campbell (.236, 2 HR, 9 RBI).
May 1 – Falcons SP Ayahito Ochi (3-1, 1.95 ERA) holds the Indians hitless for 8.2 innings before giving up a double to IND INF/CF/RF Wally Leggett (.188, 1 HR, 9 RBI) and is replaced with CHA CL Orazio Cecere (1-1, 2.16 ERA, 5 SV) to close out the narrow 2-0 contest.
May 1 – A first-inning home run by NYC 1B Alex Vargas (.195, 1 HR, 2 RBI) remains the only score in the Crusaders’ 1-0 win against the Condors.
May 1 – The Wolves score three in the ninth to tie the Blue Sox, and then two more in the tenth to counter Nashville’s tenth-inning run and walk it off, 5-4, after doing next to nothing for eight innings.
May 3 – CIN SP Shoma Nakayama (1-2, 5.59 ERA) was diagnosed with an oblique strain and was going to miss a month.
May 4 – A ruptured medial collateral ligament ends the season of OCT SP Danny Baca (2-0, 4.55 ERA).
May 4 – Aces OF Victor Lorenzo (.337, 0 HR, 6 RBI) was expected to miss a month with a separated shoulder.

Player of the Week (FL): CIN OF Fernando Cruz (.364, 2 HR, 13 RBI) clipping .538 (14-26) with 1 HR, 6 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): VAN OF Dan Moore (.378, 1 HR, 14 RBI), slapping .560 (14-25) with 4 RBI

FL Hitter of the Month: DAL CF/LF Matt Little (.356, 5 HR, 30 RBI)
CL Hitter of the Month: ATL C Justin Hart (.384, 6 HR, 30 RBI)
FL Pitcher of the Month: CIN CL Ben Dickson (4-2, 2.70 ERA, 6 SV)
CL Pitcher of the Month: ATL SP Adam Lunn (5-0, 0.92 ERA)
FL Rookie of the Month: RIC OF/1B Dan Vaughn (.298, 0 HR, 12 RBI)
CL Rookie of the Month: ATL OF David Mendoza (.274, 3 HR, 17 RBI)

Complaints and stuff

(grins stupidly from ear to ear, especially for a 3-3 week)

The Tyler Wharton injury sucks, but we might get him back around Wednesday, so I’ll hold the tears a while longer. Mireles taking his .318 stick to the DL is also not great. The thing is, there’s like five batters on the roster that are not hitting anything at all, but they’re hogging two positions between them, so the bottom of the order is so bleak. Jalomo’s not gonna last much longer. 2065 fifth-rounder Sam Brown is hitting .349 in AAA, and he’s not great defensively, but we need more sticks. He’s also lefty-hitting, so he’s not meshing with Flowe, but we gotta find us some warm paws.

Jerry Morejon reached .200 for the first time here with the walkoff slam, and hit 6-for-18 with 3 HR and 11 RBI this week.

I don’t have any solutions for the dire rightfield platoon right now. The best hitting outfielder in AAA is Carlos Matas, who’s 29 and we’re kinda through all his tricks at the AAA level (.229, 4 HR, 26 RBI in 159 career games).

We have four more at home with the Crusaders now, and then will make a trip to Denver on the weekend. There’s a 2-week homestand on the other side of that.

If you excuse be now, I have to go down to the clubhouse and give Jerry Morejon what he deserves for a 2-out, come-from-behind, walkoff slammo against the damn, dumb, dense Elks. Yes, a thick smooch on the cheek. Both cheeks!!

Fun Fact: The Knights are one of five teams with fewer than two World Series championships.

They won their only title in 2055, joining other one-times in their division as the Falcons (2005) and Condors (2029) also only have one ring to their name, as do the Buffaloes (2059).

Of course, the Miners have never won a championship in 18 trips to the postseason.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (12-13) vs. Crusaders (13-10) – May 5-8, 2070

The Crusaders, who brought the best pen in the league for this four-game set, ranked ninth in offense and second in pitching after a month’s worth of games, and they were second in the division, half a game out of first place. The entire team had hit six home runs – as much as Tyler Wharton, who would miss at least the first couple of games here – but to be fair, they had yet to come up against Tony Gaytan and Vinny Morales… New York had won the season series last year, 11-7.

Projected matchups:
Ian Lowry (2-0, 2.67 ERA) vs. Paul Egley (1-1, 2.27 ERA)
Nick Walla (3-2, 4.26 ERA) vs. Dennis Marck (1-0, 1.89 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (1-3, 2.89 ERA) vs. Colt Long (2-0, 2.12 ERA)
Vinny Morales (3-2, 4.67 ERA) vs. Jarod Nesbit (1-3, 6.32 ERA)

Long was the only left-hander in the rotaton, and the only Crusaders pitcher with two wins to his name – besides closer John Faughnan, who had three.

Game 1
NYC: SS Roza – 2B Philpot – RF Ospina – CF Box – 3B Reber – 1B A. Vargas – LF Merrill – C A. Morris – P Egley
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – CF Otal – SS Katzman – 3B Gallo – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Lowry

Lowry was broken up in no time by the Crusaders, who started the second inning on 2-strike doubles up either line by Bryant Box and Kyle Reber, and it only got worse from there. Lowry filled the bases with Alex Vargas and Jonathan Merrill, walked in a run against Andy Morris, struck out the pitcher for the actual first out of the inning, walked in ANOTHER run facing Josh Roza, and a fourth run scored on Ryan Philpot’s fielder’s choice grounder the Coons couldn’t turn for to. Willie Ospina then finally grounded out to Yocum to end the inning… Kyle Reber added a homer in the third inning, and Lowry then tumbled through the rest of five innings with a 5-0 deficit and giving up rockets in an attempt to dig the hole yet deeper, but the defense did a little magic behind him before it could get worse. The Raccoons were not really visible through four innings before Corral and Flowe went to the corners with 1-out knocks in the bottom 5th. Van Otterdijk batted for Lowry then and was nicked by Egley, loading them up for Humphries, who hit into a 5-4-3 double play.

The Otter remained in the game as Humphries got half a day off and the pitcher ended up in the #1 slot for Portland as the Raccoons got four outs from Edgar Gutierrez, two from Gabriel Rios, and three from Jason Holzmeister, who came on in a double switch that exited Jose Corral from the game. The revamped 9-1 section then began the bottom 8th with two singles against Egley, who walked Yocum to load the bases with nobody out and put the tying run in the on-deck circle. Unsurprisingly, the Raccoons didn’t pull off a rally. Benito Otal hit a sac fly, and Katzman crashed into the next double play. Holzmeister gave the run then back in sympathy in the ninth, in which J.P. Gallo hit a window-dressing homer. 6-2 Crusaders. Fumero 1-1; Morejon 2-4; van Otterdijk 1-1;

Game 2
NYC: SS Roza – 2B Philpot – RF Ospina – LF J. Acuna – CF Box – 1B A. Vargas – 3B Maudlin – C Marty – P Marck
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – CF Otal – SS Katzman – 3B Gallo – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Walla

Walla allowed a walk to Alex Vargas, but nothing else the first time through, but also bunted into a double play after Jake Flowe hit a leadoff single in the bottom 3rd. In short, nobody scored, or came close to scoring, in the early innings. Willie Ospina hit a double into the right-center gap with one out in the fourth inning, but left the game with an oblique strain. The Crusaders failed to score in his memory; Javier Acuna struck out in a full count, and while Walla walked Bryant Box, he got an easy grounder from Vargas to end the inning. Instead, the Raccoons took a lead in the bottom 4th. Otal legged out an infield single, stole second base, moved up on a Katzman grounder, and then scored leisurely when Gallo sent a ball into the left-center gap where it caromed around long enough for Gallo to slide into third base with an RBI triple. Morejon grounded out to short, but that got Gallo home.

Walla needed 100 pitches exactly through six shutout innings, which was a decidedly mixed bag, while the Raccoons made two outs in the bottom 6th before loading the bags with the 5-6-7 hitters and squeezing Dennis Marck out of the game. Nick Ellis entered to face Jake Flowe, the count ran full, and Flowe struck out. Walla then got two more outs before giving up a single to Ryan Marty. When Merrill pinch-hit in the #9 hole, McMahan came out to meet him, got a grounder to second, and that ended the inning. Josh Roza hit a single that dropped behind Yocum to start the eighth. Nava replaced McMahan, got Philpot on a pop, and then a double play from Bill Davidson, Ospina’s replacement. The Raccoons did not tack on in the late innings, but Pedro Valentin shut down the Crusaders to complete a 5-hit shutout that took 16 paws to piece together. 2-0 Critters. Gallo 2-4, 3B, RBI; Walla 6.2 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 4 K, W (4-2) and 1-2;

Willie Ospina (.320, 1 HR, 4 RBI) went to New York’s DL, while the Raccoons would make another attempt at getting back to .500 on Wednesday – and with Tyler Wharton back in the lineup.

Game 3
NYC: SS Roza – 2B Philpot – LF B. Davidson – CF Box – 3B Reber – 1B Nakamura – RF Maudlin – C Marty – P C. Long
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Fumero – RF van Otterdijk – 3B Davis – C Jalomo – P Gaytan

Gaytan managed to fall 2-0 behind while giving up anything but a homer in the second inning, where Box doubled, Natsu Nakamura hit an RBI single, and the catcher Marty *tripled* with two outs for that second New York run. The Coons left Fumero and Jacob Davis on the corners in the second, but got a run with two gone in the third, in which Yocum doubled and Katz singled him home. Big Wharton hit a long fly to left, but it was not long enough and ended up with Davidson.

Showing neither stuff nor homers, Gaytan gave up another run in the sixth on a Philpot triple to center and Box’ 2-out RBI single that gave New York a 3-1 lead. The Coons had gotten Humphries on base with two outs in the fifth, and while he stole second base, he was left on by Yocum. Katz drew a leadoff walk in the bottom 6th, but Wharton rolled into a double play. New inning, new attempt, as van Otterdijk’s leadoff single in the seventh got Long removed for right-hander Adam Dochterman. Davis hit into a double play, and that took care of that inning. Humph walked to begin the eighth, the third straight inning where Team Brown got the first batter on while trailing by two. Dochterman walked Yocum, which was at least better than an instant double play, Katz singled to center, and now the bags were full with nobody out for Big Bash Wharton … who struck out in a full count. Carlos Fumero came to the rescue, clapping a solid single to right-center, which got home the tying runs. Lefty ex-Coon Nick Robinson replaced Dochterman, van Otterdijk lined out to short, but Davis clubbed a 2-run double to right-center and the Raccoons were now ahead. Jalomo grounded out, Valentin came on for the ninth inning… walked Box and Jeff Maudlin (squints and squeals) … but then Ryan Marty popped out to Fumero in foul territory to end the game. 5-3 Raccoons. Katzman 2-3, BB, RBI; Fumero 2-4, 2 RBI; Davis 2-4, 2B, 2 RBI;

Back at .500, whee!

Game 4
NYC: SS Roza – 2B Philpot – CF Box – 3B Reber – 1B Nakamura – LF T. Griffin – RF Maudlin – C Marty – P Nesbit
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Morales

Vinny Morales allowed only one hit in three innings on Thursday while the Coons scattered five base knocks and barely got a 1-0 lead when Humphries hurried home on Katz’ sac fly to right in the third inning. In the fourth, the Coons made two outs before Jake Flowe singled. Morales came up and *cranked* a 2-run homer to right to extend his own lead to 3-0…! (snout hangs open) That was the second home run for a Raccoons pitcher on the season…!

Morales then gave up a leadoff walk to Nakamura in the fifth, but got a double play from Tony Griffin, which was good, since Davidson then took him deep to left, 3-1. Vinny leaked a walk to Nesbit in the sixth, but somehow wobbled through that inning and the seventh, too, without giving up any more damage, and had only given up two hits by the stretch. Meanwhile, Nesbit was out after wix innings, and Nick Ellis allowed a 1-out single to Yocum in the bottom 7th. Yocum stole second, then had an easy jog home on Katz’ wallbanger double in right-center. Wharton walked, Morejon grounded out, and Gallo whiffed to complete the inning.

The eighth saw two more outs from Morales, while allowing a single to Marty, before he hit triple digits on the pitch-o-meter and was removed. Roza flew out against Victor Ramirez to leave Marty on base. Ellis allowed leadoff singles to Corral and Flowe in the bottom 8th, who were then bunted into scoring position by Ramirez. Humph grounded out to third base, which didn’t help, but Yocum singled cleanly through the right side and got both runners home. With that, Ramirez remained in the game in the ninth inning and completed the game and picked up a sneaky save along the way. 6-1 Raccoons. Yocum 3-5, 2 RBI; Katzman 2-2, 2 BB, 2B, 2 RBI; Flowe 3-4, 2B; Morales 7.2 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 2 K, W (4-2) and 1-3, HR, 2 RBI;

Raccoons (15-14) @ Gold Sox (12-15) – May 9-11, 2070

The Coons hopped across the mountain for a weekend set against the last-place Gold Sox, although last place in the FL West at this point was only two games out of first place. They ranked eighth in runs scored and runs allowed in the Federal League, with a beleaguered rotation and no speed at all, having stolen only four bases so far. They had a -12 run differential (Coons: +3!). Portland had won the last three interleague meetings with the Sox, including a sweep in the most recent encounter in 2068.

Projected matchups:
Jimmy Wharton (1-2, 3.27 ERA) vs. Tony Lira (1-1, 4.82 ERA)
Ian Lowry (2-1, 3.66 ERA) vs. Jasper Madsen (0-0, 3.38 ERA)
Nick Walla (4-2, 3.52 ERA) vs. Aaron O’Harra (3-2, 6.25 ERA)

Southpaw Sunday! Also, two right-handers to begin the series that had made most of their 2070 appearances in relief. Madsen was the #6 pick from the 2066 draft, one pick behind the Coons’ Jack Hamel, who was hitting .167 in AAA as of Friday morning. Madsen, 22, was making his second ABL start, but had pitched 12 times out of the pen last September and to begin this year. He was without a doubt a starter, and probably a good one, but at this point appeared underdone.

Game 1
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – C Jalomo – P J. Wharton
DEN: CF Killelea – 1B J. Gutierrez – LF M. Sandoval – RF Tuck – C R. Rogers – 3B B. Metz – SS Gonzilez – 2B Fusselman – P T. Lira

Neither team scored through three innings on Friday, but while Tony Lira allowed just one base runner, Jimmyboy nicked two batters, gave up two hits, a walk, and a few outfield rockets – and somehow no runs, as the Gold Sox had Steve Killelea thrown out trying to steal third base and also found a double play to hit into to invalidate their attempts. Big Wharton bopped a solo homer with two outs in the fourth that gave the Coons a 1-0 lead, and Gallo and Corral hit leadoff singles in the fifth to put some pressure on Tony Lira. Jalomo whiffed, but Lira then inexplicably walked Little Wharton to load the bases. From there, Lira threw not one, but TWO wild pitches to get runners home, then walked Humphries and Yocum to reload the bases, and issued *another* walk to Katzman to force in another run. Tyler Wharton put him out of his misery with a 2-run single to left, 6-0, and when Mike Penaranda replaced Lira, he walked Morejon to fill the bags again, walked in *another* run facing Gallo, and then actually got an out from Corral, who grounded out, but got another run home with that. Jalomo then fouled out to end a GLORIOUS 3-hit, 7-run inning.

Of course there was concern for Jimmy Wharton now, after the top 5th had taken almost 40 minutes among 68 pitches, but he got three quick outs in the bottom of the inning and appeared fine. Penaranda allowed a triple to Humphries and balked him home in the sixth, extending the Coons’ lead to 9-0. The Coons removed Humph, Katz, and Yocum at the stretch, and didn’t amount to another run, while Jimmy Wharton continued to click off batters in the second half of the game, and suddenly arrived in the ninth inning on a 4-hitter with 99 pitches, and the Coons allowed him to try to complete the shutout against the 4-5-6 batters, but they all reached on a single, walk, and RBI single. Holzmeister replaced him and allowed another run on an RBI single by Jim Fusselman, but at least got the lid on the bubbling pot. 9-2 Raccoons! T. Wharton 5-5, HR, 2B, 3 RBI; Gallo 1-2, 3 BB, RBI; J. Wharton 8.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 5 K, W (2-2);

Tyler Wharton had five hits in the game. The entire rest of the team had three hits pooled together, but drew eight walks and held still while the Gold Sox shotgunned both of their own legs off, so good job on that front.

Game 2
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – 3B Gallo – RF van Otterdijk – C Flowe – P Lowry
DEN: CF Killelea – 1B J. Gutierrez – RF Tuck – C R. Rogers – 3B B. Metz – SS Gonzilez – LF Millen – 2B Fusselman – P Madsen

Portland loaded the bases with the 3-4-5 batters, who got two singles and a walk, and then saw Gallo strike out in the first inning. Killelea nearly hit a first-pitch homer in the bottom 1st, but Humph made a catch against the fence, and Lowry and him hit 2-out singles in the second that also led precisely nowhere. The Coons scored their first run on their seventh hit of the night, as van Otterdijk singled home Wharton, who had singled along with Morejon to begin the top 3rd. Flowe then struck out, and our left-on-base tally was already up to seven, right before Juan Gutierrez tied the game with a homer to right in the home half of the inning.

After Fumero singled and was left on in the fourth, Steve Millen gave Denver a lead with another solo homer to right. The fifth inning was calm before van Otterdijk reached on an error by Alex Gonzilez to begin the sixth. Flowe singled, and the runners were bunted into scoring position by Lowry. Madsen lost Humph in a full count, loading them up for Fumero, who singled up the middle in another full count. The Otter scored, but Flowe was held at third base. Katz kept the line moving, hitting another RBI single to center for a 3-2 lead, and also knocked out Madsen before Tyler Wharton could do serious, nonconsensual damage to his underage tush. The slugger had to settle for a sac fly to left against Penaranda, but Morejon got another RBI single before Gallo grounded out to Jim Fusselman. The score was 5-2 in the middle of the sixth.

Lowry got four more outs, most of them loud, and then walked PH Steven Jordan in the #9 hole before exiting in the seventh. McMahan came on for the left-handed top of the order, got Killelea on a pop, but then allowed an RBI single to Gutierrez and Chris Tuck reached on a Katzman error. Nava replaced him, gave up a screaming liner to Ryan Rogers, but it was within reach of Humphries in left-center, who made a great pick to end the inning, still up 5-3.

Left-hander Kelvin Castillo walked Humph and Fumero in the eighth, but rung up Katzman and got a double play outta Wharton, so the Raccoons did not tack on. Nava got one more out before Rios put on Gonzilez and Millen, left-handed batters, before ringing up Fusselman, a right-handed batter. Another lefty swinger, Justin Donaldson, pinch-hit for Castillo and grounded out to short, stranding the tying runs for the second straight inning. The Gold Sox would do the same choke for a third straight inning to lose the game in the ninth after they got Gutierrez on with a single and Rogers drawing a walk off oddly inefficient Pedro Valentin, who nevertheless got a cozy fly from Beau Metz to Otal in leftfield to end the game. 5-3 Coons. Fumero 2-4, BB, RBI; Katzman 2-5, RBI; T. Wharton 2-4, RBI; Morejon 2-4, BB, RBI;

We had 12 hits, all singles, but somehow managed to squeeze out our fifth straight W.

Game 3
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Fumero – 3B Gallo – RF van Otterdijk – C Flowe – P Walla
DEN: CF Killelea – 1B J. Gutierrez – LF M. Sandoval – RF Tuck – C R. Rogers – 3B B. Metz – SS Gonzilez – 2B Fusselman – P O’Harra

Humph singled, Yocum walked, and Katzman singled in a run to begin the game, but then the Raccoons made rapid outs with a Wharton K and a double play grounder by Fumero. Walla also allowed a run before he got an out, as Killelea singled, Gutierrez walked, and Miguel Sandoval hit an RBI double to right. Tuck’s grounder got a second run home for Denver before they left Sandoval at second base. It was soon apparent that Walla once again had put his pants on with no stuff at all, but he singled to begin the third inning and got around to score on a grounder, Yocum’s single, and Katz’ sac fly to tie the game. Wharton walked with two outs, and Fumero hit a fly to the fence that Tuck caught.

Sandoval hit his second RBI double of the game in the bottom 3rd after the 2-3 batters reached against an entirely defenseless Walla, who hit another single in the fourth instead, that one with Gallo and Flowe on base and the Gold Sox already having made an error when Gutierrez bungled the catcher’s grounder. Humph batted with three on and one out, struck out, and Yocum grounded out. The Coons hit long flies with Wharton and Gallo in the fifth that were also caught, while Walla drilled Sandoval, which was one way to keep him from pumping out the doubles.

Walla hit his third single of the game in the sixth inning, but remained yucky on the hill, allowed two more hits in the bottom of the sixth, and when Yocum made a diving catch on a low liner by PH Justin Donaldson to keep those runners stranded, Walla was quietly whisked away to prevent further damage. The score, mind, was still 3-2 Denver, and Yocum hit a leadoff single off Jorge Garza in the seventh, but then was caught stealing. It was alright, though, because Katz’ grounder to short woulda been two anyway…..

The Coons struck out in order in the eighth while Holzmeister loaded the bases with the 5-6-7 batters and nobody out in the bottom 8th. He was hooked and replaced with Rios, who struck out Steve Millen, struck out Earl Fleet, and struck out Steve Killelea to turn away the Gold Sox… but they were still winning and the Coons had the 8-9-1 batters up against John Silver and his sterling 0.00 ERA from 12 innings in the ninth. Flowe lifted one out to right for Tuck to catch, and Morejon whiffed, but Humph legged out an infield single. Yocum quickly hit another single, moving the tying run to third base. Silver got Katzman to 2-2 before Katz slapped a ball over the head of the shortstop and into left-center! Humphries was waved around and scored, and Walla was off the hook with the game tied! Wharton was next, was also down to two strikes, and then raked a liner to right, where it caromed hard off the wall and past the rushing Tuck, who could not reverse so fast, bounced off the wall awkwardly, and by the time him and Gonzilez met at the ball in shallow right, Wharton was standing at third base with the go-ahead, 2-out, 2-run triple!! Benito Otal batted for Fumero against new pitcher Phil Nelson, popped out, and then the ball went to Danny Nava, accounting for Valentin’s second long outing of the week on Saturday. The right-hander retired Gutierrez, Sandoval, and Tuck in order to get the Coons’ sixth straight W into the books! 5-3 Furballs! Yocum 4-5; Katzman 2-4, 3 RBI;

In other news

May 5 – Rebels OF Travis Bickerton (.317, 2 HR, 9 RBI) will miss up to six weeks with a separated shoulder.
May 5 – Sacramento takes 15 innings to beat the Gold Sox, 3-2. Denver leadoff man OF/1B Steve Killelea (.193, 0 HR, 4 RBI) manages to go 0-for-8 with no strikeouts.
May 6 – Eight runs are scored in the tenth inning of the Titans-Indians game that was tied at one through nine innings. The Titans win with a 5-spot in the top of the tenth, 6-4.
May 8 – LAP C Matt Warner (.302, 2 HR, 10 RBI) goes unretired with three hits, two walks, a home run, and five RBI in a 10-4 win against the Warriors.
May 9 – The Cyclones’ OF Anthony Schneider (.265, 3 HR, 15 RBI) hits for the cycle in a 16-4 rout of the Aces, bashing out the four required hits in just six innings before adding a walk and another single on top of that. Schneider drives in three runs in the game. This marks the 150th cycle in league history and the fifth for the Cyclones franchise.
May 10 – The Condors expect OF Jeremy Jenkins (.262, 2 HR, 6 RBI) to be out for up to four months due to a torn labrum.
May 10 – SAC INF John Schmidt (.287, 0 HR, 13 RBI) went on the DL with chronic back soreness and was going to be shut down for the rest of the month.
May 11 – Capitals 2B Andy Ratliff (.426, 1 HR, 22 RBI) finishes the week with a 2-run single in a 6-5 win against the Knights, which gives him a 20-game hitting streak.

Player of the Week (FL): CIN OF Anthony Schneider (.282, 4 HR, 16 RBI), batting .462 (12-26) with 2 HR, 5 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): ATL 1B Kris DiPrimio (.358, 4 HR, 23 RBI), hitting .545 (12-22) with 1 HR, 7 RBI

Complaints and stuff

The Raccoons’ 6-game winning streak vaulted them to second place in the division, one game behind the Titans, who were rained out on Sunday in Topeka and were rewarded with having an upcoming 4-city road trip turned into a 5-city road trip by having the makeup date inserted into their off day there. Portland was the second stop on that tour around the country, where they would be our third opponent on the upcoming homestand, which would begin on Tuesday with the Cyclones and Loggers in.

After two trying games to begin the week, the offense put out five straight games with 5+ runs, and seven of their last nine, winning all of them and also Tuesday’s 2-0 W behind Nick Walla, for a 6-game winning streak and 8-1 run. We were up to 4.28 runs scored per game now! It’s almost like we might end up being fine after all.

But don’t you worry, I’ll find more doom and gloom for you soon. This is Portland baseball after all.

Some tweaks around the roster will come, with Jalomo an obvious problem, but we also have three outfielders that only show up occasionally and when it fits their schedule…

But anyway, six in a row, and now we get to see the twice-defending champs and the Loggers. I have a hunch we won’t be W12 next Sunday.

Fun Fact: Two of the four previous Cyclones to hit for a cycle spent time on the Raccoons.

The players to hit cycles with Cincy before Anthony Schneider on Friday were R.J. DeWeese (2012), Carlos Vega (2047), Juan del Toro (2055), and John MacDonnell (2057).

Del Toro only spent half a season with the Critters, batting .275 with six homers, after being acquired from the Stars with much fanfare and at the expense of three valuable pitchers (most notably at the time probably Bubba Wolinsky), but then was offloaded to Cincy just eight months later to acquire Trent Brassfield, who’s still stumbling around the league.

DeWeese though was different. He played on the Coons *after* his Cyclones stint, arriving on a 7-year, $23.1M contract that was a lotta money at that time, and hit well for one season, two if you’re charitable, and then just became that giant millstone around the neck of the late-10s Coons that went out in the CLCS three years in a row and then flubbed the division to the Loggers in a second tie-breaker in 2020. That was the last game of DeWeese’s Coons tenure, as we somehow managed to offload his dead bottoms to the Thunder for CF Josh Stevenson, who nobody remembers these days although he was a starting outfielder for three years in Portland, but those teams were all anonymous and descending into a rebuild. DeWeese, for $16.5M of precious 2010s dollars, hit all of .232 with 111 homers and 387 RBI in five years, which doesn’t *sound* that bad, but I think I was reasonably insufferable about him at the time, because the second I mentioned his name earlier, Maud rolled her eyes and left the room.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (18-14) vs. Cyclones (19-12) – May 13-15, 2070

Tied for first, the Cyclones had no time for the Raccoons and their upstartness, they needed wins and could not take any precautions for the Coons’ tender 6-game winning streak. These teams had last met in 2068, when the Raccoons won two of the three games against the later World Series winners. They brought both the third-best offense and pitching in the Federal League, and a +23 run differential. They did not bring Shoma Nakayama, Alex Castillo, and Fernando Cruz, who were all on the DL.

Projected matchups:
Tony Gaytan (2-3, 2.98 ERA) vs. Ray Rath (4-0, 2.70 ERA)
Vinny Morales (4-2, 3.89 ERA) vs. Luis Briseno (2-3, 4.29 ERA)
Jimmy Wharton (2-2, 3.07 ERA) vs. Blake Anderson (1-2, 5.77 ERA)

…or a left-handed starting pitcher. The entire rotation was right-handed.

Game 1
CIN: 2B D. Richardson – C Arviso – 1B M. Peterson – LF M. Avila – CF A. Schneider – 3B Gaines – SS A.J. Taylor – RF Seybert – P Rath
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Gaytan

The 2-to-6 batters in that Cyclones lineup were all left-handed hitters, so putting the leadoff man Daniel Richardson base was not the smoothest play, but Gaytan made up or the leadoff single with two strikeouts on Matt Peterson and Mel Avila, and didn’t allow a run. The Raccoons got Katz and Wharton on with two outs, but Gallo popped out; however, Jerry Morejon hit a leadoff homer in the bottom 2nd to give Portland the lead. Corral and Flowe both hit singles, and while Gaytan bunted badly and got Corral forced out at third base, a wild pitch advanced the battery into scoring position, and they then scored one by one on more singles by Humph and Yocum. Katz hit another RBI single to make it 4-0, but Wharton then hit into a double play.

Gaytan took the lead and ran with it, striking out six through five innings while allowing only one more hit, then allowed a single to relief pitcher Brian Wilkey in the sixth. Wilkey had loaded the bases, but struck out Gaytan to escape in the bottom 5th, then added another clean inning. He was batted for with Austin Spurgeon in the seventh when Gaytan had knocked Anthony Schneider in a full count, walked A.J. Taylor, and allowed a single to Adam Seybert. Spurgeon got the chance to bat with two outs, but grounded out to short rather conventionally and the Cyclones remained off the board. Gaytan’s day ended with a flyout from Richardson to Corral in the eighth, after which the ball went to McMahan. He walked the former Bostonian Jorge Arviso, but then got two groundouts to end the inning, and retired Schneider and Tony Gaines to begin the ninth before Victor Ramirez came in to ring up Taylor and finish the game. 4-0 Raccoons. Humphries 2-5, 2B, RBI; Katzman 2-4, RBI; Morejon 2-4, HR, RBI; Corral 2-4; Gaytan 7.1 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 9 K, W (3-3);

The Cyclones inserted a spot starter on Wednesday, sending out right-hander Gabe Green (1-0, 3.38 ERA) to have a go. Both teams also brought the same lineup as in the opener.

Game 2
CIN: 2B D. Richardson – C Arviso – 1B M. Peterson – LF M. Avila – CF A. Schneider – 3B Gaines – SS A.J. Taylor – RF Seybert – P G. Green
POR: LF Humphries – 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Morales

After Morales issued a walk to Arviso but got through the first inning alright, the Raccoons began with a walk drawn by Humphries in the bottom 1st. He stole second, then advanced and scored, respectively, on singles by Yocum and Katzman. Wharton hit another soft single, loading the bags with nobody out, before the 5-6-7 looked like idiots and struck out, popped out, and grounded out to leave three runners on base. Things got worse in the top 2nd when Humphries hurt himself on a diving catch to retire Taylor after Morales had walked Gaines and before he drilled Seybert. Van Otterdijk replaced Humphries, but Green’s groundout ended the inning without a run being conceded.

Morales continued to give out freebies, walking both Schneider and Gaines in full counts in the fourth, which created traffic, and while neither scored as Taylor whiffed and Seybert then popped out, it also escalated his pitch count rather briskly. In fact there was so much traffic that it didn’t even register with me that Morales was no-hitting the Cyclones until he gave up back-to-back doubles to Avila and Schneider to blow the lead in the sixth inning, which was also his last one, needing 101 pitches to get even that far. The Coons had stranded the Otter and Yocum and their pair of singles in the fifth, and Corral doubled with two outs and Flowe was walked intentionally in the sixth. Fumero batted for Morales, but grounded out.

The Coons used Gabriel Rios for two innings, resulting in a walk and five strikeouts on the heavily lefty-laden lineup the Cyclones were throwing at the Raccoons. Wharton reached to begin the bottom 8th, but was caught stealing, and the score remained one-all through the top of the ninth, in which Pedro Valentin sawed off the Cyclones without mercy. The Raccoons got Ben Dickson in the bottom 9th. Corral drew a leadoff walk, but Flowe and Otal then popped out and van Otterdijk whiffed to send the game into overtime.

Holzmeister struck out the side in the tenth, consisting of Aaron Hutnick, Richardson, and Arviso, while Dickson pitched a second inning around a Katzman single and kept the Coons from walking it off. Holzmeister also got a second inning, but there was decidedly less magic around that as he still struck out Austin Spurgeon, but then allowed a walk to Mel Avila, and hits by Gaines and Taylor with two outs allowed the Cyclones to break the tie in their favor. Dickson popped out in the #8 hole as the Cyclones were out of bench players. Left-hander Marcos Laureano then was brought in for the bottom 11th, facing the all-lefty 6-7-8 batters, who had the pitcher behind them and only Davis and Jalomo on the bench. Morejon hit a leadoff single, after which we decided to get cute and use Corral to bunt, resulting in a ball slapped in the direction of Gaines that was taken to second to erase the lead runner. Jalomo popped out and Davis grounded out to end the game. 2-1 Cyclones. Yocum 2-5; Katzman 2-5, RBI; T. Wharton 2-4, BB; Rios 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 5 K;

Surely wasn’t for a lack of runners, as we out-hit Cincy 9-4 and also drew four walks.

But the real hammer came on Thursday, when Luis Silva reported that Steve Humphries had torn finger tendons in his paw and that he was going to miss the next three months.

Once I finished being unconscious, Humphries was put on the DL and OF/1B Jamie Colter was once again unhappily recalled from AAA.

Bleak.

Game 3
CIN: 2B Gaines – LF M. Avila – C Arviso – SS A.J. Taylor – CF A. Schneider – 1B Spurgeon – RF Seybert – 3B D. Richardson – P B. Anderson
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – LF van Otterdijk – RF Corral – C Jalomo – P J. Wharton

To celebrate everything going to ****, Jimmy Wharton allowed a leadoff single to Tony Gaines, walked Avila, and gave up a 3-run homer to Arviso right out of the gate. Adam Yocum then answered with a leadoff jack against Blake Anderson, only the seventh home run of his career of 4,220 at-bats. That unlikely homer was the only Coons hit in the first three innings, but Morejon hit another leadoff homer in the fourth, narrowing the score to 3-2 while the Cyclones had scattered four base runners in the meantime (including a Katzman error). Cincy got leadoff singles from Avila and Arviso in the fifth before Taylor flew out and Schneider clubbed one into a 1-6-3 double play. Jimmyboy walked Spurgeon to begin the sixth and then had to labor around that and was at almost 100 pitches through six innings.

Bottom 6th, Yocum hit a leadoff single. He tried to steal, but couldn’t time Anderson, who was not exactly a great guardian of his own basepaths, and he only advanced when Katz grounded out to third. Anderson walked Morejon, and the pair then executed a double steal on the first pitch to Wharton, and while we feared that this would take the stick away from Big Wharton, the pitch had been a strike and the Cyclones thought they had a good start there. But Anderson threw it in the fat bit of the zone and Wharton ripped a score-flipping double with it on the very next pitch! Gallo slapped an RBI single to right, 5-3, and then van Otterdijk was called out on strikes and objected loudly, getting tossed for his bothers. Otal replaced him. Corral grounded out to end the inning.

Wharton came back for the seventh against the lefty top of the order which was somewhere between bold and foolish, depending on results, but he got two outs before walking Arviso, so we’d call that one a slight W and went to Ramirez, who popped out Taylor to end the inning. McMahan allowed a single in the eight while getting two outs and we then went right to Valentin for a (hopefully) 4-out save, beginning with Richardson grounding out. While the Coons got Katzman on and did nothing with him in the eighth, Valentin was indeed flawless and struck out two of the three batters he faced in the ninth inning. 5-3 Raccoons. Yocum 2-4, HR, RBI;

The tenure of Willie Jalomo ended with another oh-fer, and he was optioned to St. Pete batting just .078 (4-for-51) with one RBI. He was replaced with another rookie catcher, Sam Brown, our fifth-round pick five years ago.

Raccoons (20-15) vs. Loggers (17-15) – May 16-18, 2070

The Loggers, who we had beaten two outta three in April, had only the #2 offense at this point, but were allowing the fewest runs in the CL, which made NO sense after they had always led the league in getting bombed for several years. They had a +53 run differential and were just two games over .500?? I wish the baseball gods would at least occasionally make it make sense. Our run differential was at +19 at this point.

Projected matchups:
Ian Lowry (3-1, 3.76 ERA) vs. Ramon Carreno (2-0, 0.81 ERA)
Nick Walla (4-2, 3.65 ERA) vs. Curt Green (3-1, 3.72 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (3-3, 2.56 ERA) vs. Matt Crist (4-2, 2.42 ERA)

Again only right-handed starters on offer here. Carreno, age 35, was 11 years and four cities removed from his Coons days, on his second Loggers stint, and had so far mostly pitched out of the pen, so there was a grain-of-salt thing to his stats.

Game 1
MIL: SS Van Leeuwen – RF Da. Wright – LF C. Dominguez – C M. Rodriguez – 1B C. Ramirez – 2B F. Carrera – CF Parrish – 3B Di. Mendoza – P Carreno
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – LF Otal – C Flowe – P Lowry

The Loggers were up 1-0 quickly in this game as Dave Wright and Carlos Dominguez got on right away with one out in the first inning and then Manuel Rodriguez hit a sac fly to get them ahead, but they lost Fidel Carrera to an injury in the second inning. Lowry then was exploded for five runs in the third inning, which was also how many batters, starting with the pitcher Carreno, reached base unimpededly. Three straight singles, a walk to Dominguez to force in a run, nailing Rodriguez to force in another, and then Cesar Ramirez knocked in two and John Parrish got a sac fly at the tail end.

For a bit the Coons looked beaten since Carreno allowed only one hit in the first three innings, but an error by Vince Shapiro, who replaced Carrera, allowed Tyler Wharton on base to begin the bottom 4th and then a Corral triple, Otal double, and a 2-out single by long man Edgar Gutierrez all brought in a run and cut the deficit down to three runs, 6-3. Two of the runs were unearned. The tying runs were on the corners with one out in the fifth then, thanks to Morejon doubling to center and Wharton getting a single through the left side. The result was not as impressive as we might have hoped, though, as Gallo plated a run with a groundout, but Corral popped out foul and that was that.

Gutierrez pitched 3.2 innings of garbage relief before running out of steam. Sean Van Leeuwen singled, Dominguez reached on an error, and Rodriguez walked to fill them up for the Loggers. Rios replaced him and Ramirez hit a liner at Morejon for the third out.

Carreno left after six and Luis Lerma got five outs for the Loggers before walking Fumero in the #9 hole. Julio Robles replaced him, allowed a single to Yocum, and the tying runs were on with two down for Katzman, but he popped out to short in a full count. While Danny Nava held the Loggers close, Morejon’s leadoff double presented Wharton as the tying run in the bottom 9th, facing right-hander B.J. Butrico, but he flew out easily to Dave Wright. Gallo singled, putting the tying runs on the corners, which brought up… the pitcher’s spot, where the Raccoons had the choice between Jamie Colter, Jacob Davis, and Sam Brown, which was like deciding which deadly poison to swallow. Colter got the stick, whiffed badly, but Otal’s 2-out single kept the game going… until Jake Flowe grounded out to Casey Ramsey at second. 6-5 Loggers. Yocum 3-5; Morejon 2-3, 2 BB, 2 2B; Corral 2-4, 3B, RBI; Otal 2-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Gutierrez 3.2 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K and 1-2, RBI;

Carrera’s injury was a mild oblique strain and he remained on the Loggers roster.

Game 2
MIL: SS Van Leeuwen – RF Da. Wright – LF C. Dominguez – C M. Rodriguez – 1B C. Ramirez – 2B F. Carrera – CF Parrish – 3B Di. Mendoza – P C. Green
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – LF Otal – C Flowe – 3B Davis – RF Colter – P Walla

Even before the game I felt like Walla’s odd stufflessness and this Loggers lineup were not gonna mesh too well (for Walla), and they were up 1-0 in the first from Wright singling and stealing, and then coming home right away with another single by Dominguez. The Coons then put three of their first four batters on base as Yocum reached on an error and Katz and Wharton hit singles, the latter on the infield. Otal flew out to Dominguez in shallow left, and Flowe popped out altogether and nobody scored… Then Walla allowed another run on two hits in the second, and in the third inning got completely overrun as the Loggers were hitting to wherever they damn well pleased. Dominguez, batting third in the inning, rammed a 3-run homer, and he managed to give up another run with a walk to Rodriguez and a Carrera RBI double after that, 6-0. Walla pitched another inning, then was hit for with Gallo and two outs after Flowe and Colter got on base in the fourth. Gallo of course did ******** nothing, and Walla was quietly stuffed into a recycling bag.

Victor Ramirez pitched a quick fifth, and after that Holzmeister ached through two innings and a pile of base runners, giving up a solo home run to Diego Mendoza on the way. Since the Raccoons were not even on the board yet, it didn’t really matter, did it? McMahan then got three outs, but two days with early dismissals for Raccoons starters saw Valentin in for a useless ninth inning while down by seven runs. 7-0 Loggers. Fumero (PH) 1-1; van Otterdijk (PH) 1-1;

The Loggers took second place from the Coons with this result. Sam Brown made his ABL debut as pinch-hitter when the Coons were down to their final out and grounded out to Carrera. He would get the start behind the dish then on Sunday. Katzman got a day off.

Game 3
MIL: SS Van Leeuwen – RF Da. Wright – LF C. Dominguez – C M. Rodriguez – 1B C. Ramirez – 2B F. Carrera – CF Parrish – 3B Di. Mendoza – P Crist
POR: SS Yocum – 2B Fumero – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – LF van Otterdijk – C Brown – P Gaytan

While I was still musing to Honeypaws how Gaytan’s stuff might actually save his bacon in the Sunday game, he already gave up a double Dominguez and a homer to Rodriguez. Ramirez singled, but was left on, and nobody struck out in that unhappy first inning. The Coons then loaded the bases with a Fumero single, Wharton getting nicked by Crist, and Gallo walking. Crist lost Corral in a full count to force in a run, did the same with van Otterdijk, and then came upon the greenhorn catcher Sam Brown, who was down 2-2 before hitting a 2-out, 2-run single to left-center. Gaytan grounded out, had a 1-2-3 second against the bottom of the order, but then allowed leadoff singles to Van Leeuwen (who stole second) and Wright in the third inning. He picked Wright off first base, gave up a *long* sac fly to Dominguez that hung forever, reducing the lead to 4-3, and then kept getting blasted with a loud Rodriguez double and Ramirez’ RBI single to tie the game. In short – nobody on this bloody roster could get the Loggers out.

Crist was hit for in the second 1-2-3 dismissal of the bottom of the Loggers’ order in the fourth, and overall the middle innings were like two different teams were suddenly playing. Both teams had only one long fly ball from Dominguez and van Otterdijk from the fourth through the sixth, and neither had a base hit. The Loggers did not reach base at all against Gaytan, who got the 7-8-9 spots without problems for a third time in the seventh – but the Loggers pen was just as stingy. It took until the eighth for Dominguez to reach with a 2-out knock, but Gaytan finished his day with a K on Rodriguez, his seventh against no walks, then departed the 4-4 game with a no-decision, since the Coons’ 4-5-6 went in order against Luis Lerma in his second inning of work in the bottom 8th.

Rios struck out two in the ninth as he put away the Loggers in order, and the Raccoons’ bottom of the order now had the chance to end the game, with Lerma still pitching. Otal batted for the Otter, but flew out to John Parrish in center. Sam Brown then singled to center. Katzman batted for Rios, but flew out to left, and Yocum grounded out, sending the game to extras. Chad Pritchett singled off Ramirez, but that was as far as the Loggers got in the tenth, and then Fumero *blazed* a gapper off B.J. Butrico to begin the bottom 10th. The ball went all the way to the wall and Fumero walked into third base with a leadoff triple! There we go! The Loggers declined to walk the bags full to get a force at the plate, trusting entirely in the Raccoons’ natural ability to self-deflate, but Jerry Morejon had dinner reservations and knocked a walkoff single to left-center. 5-4 Critters. Fumero 3-5, 3B; Brown 2-4, 2 RBI;

In other news

May 12 – Boston will be without outfielder Eddie Marcotte (.330, 7 HR, 20 RBI) for the next month, as the 32-year-old has suffered an oblique strain.
May 13 – SFW 1B Joel Starr (.290, 2 HR, 13 RBI) has five hits and all the cycle parts except for the triple in a 13-7 slugfest win over the Crusaders. Starr drives in two runs in the game.
May 13 – The hitting streak of WAS 2B Andy Ratliff (.413, 1 HR, 22 RBI) ends at 20 games with an 0-for-3 in a 4-3 loss to the Canadiens.
May 14 – In a trade inside the FL East, the Blue Sox receive RF/LF Kazuhide Takeuchi (.264, 3 HR, 16 RBI) from the Miners in exchange for a minor leaguer and a prospect.
May 15 – ATL CL Erik Swain (0-2, 3.21 ERA, 11 SV) nails down a 3-2 win against L.A. for his 400th career save. The 33-year-old has four Reliever of the Year awards and is 55-55 with a 2.86 ERA and 900 strikeouts for his career.
May 16 – The Scorpions lose to the Wolves, 13-8, but 26-year-old rookie SAC 1B Orlando Reyes (.421, 1 HR, 10 RBI) shines with three hits, including the first home run of his career, and four RBI.

Player of the Week (FL): SAC 1B Justin Savalli (.275, 3 HR, 22 RBI), hitting .500 (10-20) with 2 HR, 11 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): LVA C/1B Chris Haynes (.340, 11 HR, 32 RBI), bashing .440 (11-25) with 2 HR, 8 RBI

Complaints and stuff

For the life of me I can not figure out why we can’t play the Loggers. I mean, their lineup is ridiculous, but they stuff us for even more runs than the league average gets stuffed for. They came in with just over five runs a game to their name in 2070, and ravaged the Coons’ starters to the tune of a 9.60 ERA. The pen held up for the most part, but there was not a lot to still glue back together after the outings that Lowry and Walla had…

The loss of Steve Humphries is obviously devastating and we can’t really cope with that. It removes a capable bat from the lineup and now we have four batters in there on any given day that couldn’t open a can of beans, let alone a mid-level right-hander. So this is how *this* season goes to **** then.

Seven more games on this homestand, including four against the Titans, who will not have much trouble to defend their 2-game lead in the division, and then three with the Falcons.

Fun Fact: The list of pitchers that Adam Yocum has taken deep is short enough that it can be printed here.

Blake Anderson
Sergio Davila
Steven Fenstermacher
Luis Lerma
Cory Ritter
John Silver
Eric Stengel

You’re welcome.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (21-17) vs. Titans (22-14) – May 19-22, 2070

The Titans led the division by two games over the Critters, who had their work cut out for them against… well, did they *really*? The Titans were only fourth in offense, eighth in pitching, and had only a +8 run differential (Coons: +12, admittedly). The right kind of breeze might blow them over. Like the Coons they were already laden with painful injuries, missing a whole outfield of chiefly Eddie Marcotte, plus Dan Geiger and Nick Vaughn. The Coons had won the season series in ’69, 10-8, the first W in the head-to-head against the Titans in yeeears.

Projected matchups:
Vinny Morales (4-2, 3.54 ERA) vs. Bryce Wallace (1-0, 1.04 ERA)
Jimmy Wharton (3-2, 3.21 ERA) vs. Matt Nelson (2-3, 3.58 ERA)
Ian Lowry (3-2, 4.79 ERA) vs. Mike Bell (4-2, 3.88 ERA)
Nick Walla (4-3, 4.47 ERA) vs. Tyler Riddle (3-2, 5.57 ERA)

Riddle was the only left-handed pitcher in those four. Wallace had only made two starts so far, being held back by a biceps issue earlier in the season.

Days off would continue to be handed out here, with Jerry Morejon taking a seat on Monday, leaving Big Wharton, Yocum, and Gallo for a spot on the bench at some point this week.

Game 1
BOS: SS E. Gonzales – RF M. Garcia – 3B D. Miller – C D. Johnson – 1B Goodwin – 2B Jer. White – LF S. Leon – CF Robichaud – P B. Wallace
POR: 2B Yocum – 1B Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – LF van Otterdijk – C Flowe – P Morales

Danny Miller and David Johnson hit singles in the first inning, but remained on base, and instead the Raccoons scored first in the bottom 2nd as Gallo drew a 1-out walk, Corral singled, and van Otterdijk hit an RBI double to left-center. Jake Flowe’s solid single to center scored two more, and Curt Goodwin threw away Morales’ bunt for two bases, putting another two runners into scoring position. Yocum hit an RBI single, 4-0, before Fumero’s comebacker and Katzman’s groundout ended the inning with runners on the corners. The Titans answered with an unearned run of their own in the third inning; Edgar Gonzales doubled and then scored when Flowe threw away the ball on his attempt to steal third base. In turn, after Wharton singled and Gallo got plunked to begin the bottom 3rd, Wallace got a 1-6-3 double play from Corral, but then plated Wharton with a wild pitch, 5-1. Th Otter hit another double with two outs, but was left on by Flowe.

Morales didn’t get a strikeout until the fourth inning, then gave up another run on three solid hits by Jared Robichaud, PH Kyle Grulke, and Edgar Gonzales in the fifth inning. Wharton singled and was picked off first in that inning. Vinny soldiered into the seventh inning despite constant base runners, of which he allowed another three in the seventh. Miller doubled in a run and he walked Johnson with two outs before Danny Nava rung up Goodwin to end the inning with the Coons still ahead by two runs. He got three outs and McMahan got one to complete eight innings, before Katzman tacked on a run with a leadoff homer off Jose Gomez in the bottom 8th. Wharton hit another single and Jerry Morejon walked when he came off the bench to bat for the pitcher in the #7 hole, but Flowe then grounded out to leave them on base. Valentin allowed a leadoff single to Gonzales in the ninth, then struck out Manuel Garcia and Miller. Johnson hit another single, bringing up the tying run, and Valentin threw a wild pitch before Goodwin finally grounded out to Fumero at first base. 6-3 Raccoons. T. Wharton 3-4; van Otterdijk 2-3, 2 2B, RBI; Otal 1-1;

The Titans rung the hits bell ten times against Morales, but just couldn’t bunch them up enough to topple him. Hardly a *great* outing.

Adam Yocum had the day off on Tuesday then.

Game 2
BOS: SS E. Gonzales – RF M. Garcia – 3B D. Miller – 1B Goodwin – 2B Jer. White – C D. Johnson – LF T. Pritchard – CF Padgett – P M. Nelson
POR: 2B Fumero – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – LF van Otterdijk – C Flowe – P J. Wharton

The Titans did not present a single left-handed batter to Jimmy Wharton, with Goodwin being the only switch-hitter among eight right-handed swingers. Danny Miller took him deep in the first inning for a solo homer to left, but the rest of the lineup did little that first time through, and instead the Raccoons flipped the score in the bottom 3rd when they got Fumero and Katzman on base and Tyler Wharton slapped a 2-out, 2-run single to left-center to give all the Whartons on the team a 2-1 lead that did not last long because Jimmy Wharton walked Miller and Jeremy White in the fourth and then gave up a 2-out, 3-run bomb to Johnson.

Jimmyboy ached through six innings and scattered another three hits without giving up more actual damage, then was quietly removed from the game after a rather pedestrian outing. The Raccoons had been silent for a couple of innings, but I was at least hoping they were building up the rage when Nelson hit Big Wharton and Gallo one after another to begin the bottom 6th. That put the tying runs on base for the decidedly unimpressive bottom half of the order, and my confidence sunk even faster once Corral walked, making it three on with nobody out. Van Otterdijk immediately hit into a (run-scoring) double play. Flowe was walked with intent after hitting into a double play every chance he got so far in this game, which allowed us to send Yocum to bat for Jimmyboy, and he cracked an RBI double to right to tie the game. Silly move by Boston, but we’re not complaining. Okay, I did complain when Fumero grounded out on a 3-0 pitch to end the inning…

Once in a 4-4 tie that was initially held by Gutierrez and Holzmeister, the Raccoons turned el stupido again. Katz singled his way on in the seventh, but was caught stealing; and Gallo reached base, but was doubled off by Corral in the eighth. Holzmeister remained in for the ninth, getting a fourth and fifth out before conceding a pair of singles to Robichaud and Cody Padgett in the 7-8 spots. They went to the corners, lefty-hitting Justin Beck, a 29-year-old with four major league at-bats in the last three years, showing how decimated the Boston outfield was, came up and was met by Gabriel Rios, who entered in the second Otal-for-Otter double switch in two days. Beck grounded out, and the Coons held the tie, but also did nothing against Tyler Gleason in the ninth and so the game went to extras.

Rios pitched two more innings without allowing much at all to the Titans, while the Raccoons were waiting for better times or something. Joe Cash, another lefty, replaced Gleason in the 11th, and Corral hit a leadoff single to right. Rios was used to bunt, but knocked it into a double play, and Flowe sailed out to center to prolong the game. Rios remained on the hill, gave up a leadoff single to Robichaud in the 12th, and then a 2-out homer to the #1 hitter Gonzales… Cash remained in the game for the bottom 12th, but gave up a leadoff double to Otal, threw a wild pitch, and then gave up an infield single to Fumero that scored the runner, 6-5. The winning run was in the box, then in scoring position when Katz slapped a double to right-center. Still nobody out. C’mon boys! Morejon fell down 1-2 before hitting a pop to shallow left – and Gonzales and Robichaud looked at each other as the ball dropped between them! RBI single, somehow, and the Boston lead was wiped!! Katz dabbled to third base, the Titans wanted to piece of Wharton, and sought sanctuary in a three on, nobody out spot that the Coons were sure to choke on. Left-hander Travis Davis replaced Cash, and the Coons sent Jacob Davis, the only righty stick available to bat for Gallo. We still punched a K there, and Corral’s grounder to short was so fast, Robichaud could throw out Katz at home. Jamie Colter batted for Rios and grounded out to first. (buries face in paws)

Goodwin singled and Jeremy White homered off ex-Titan Victor Ramirez to give the Titans a new 8-6 lead in the 13th then, but the left-handed Davis allowed struggling left-handed batters Flowe and Otal on base with a pair of singles in the bottom of the inning. Fumero hit another single when the lineup flipped over, but now we were in the deadly three-and-nope again… but at least the 2-3-4 were batting? Davis farted in a run by walking Katz, which was a good start, since it got a *fast* runner to third base. Morejon struck out, and Wharton’s fly to center was thoroughly unimpressive, but got that fast runner home at least and the Titans had blown their second extra-inning, 2-run lead in a row…! Right-hander Edgar Cornejo replaced one Davis, walked another Davis to fill the bags, and then Corral grounded out to keep the dance going. Valentin pitched the 14th, ringing up Garcia, who at this point had a platinum sombrero in the box score, and most importantly, didn’t allow a run. Sam Brown – last stick on the bench – then batted for him to begin the bottom 14th against Cornejo and hit a single to center. Flowe bunted him to second, but Otal and Fumero couldn’t get the runner further than that…

As we hit the 15th we had to start evaluating the remaining options. Nava and McMahan were the only remaining relievers, and both had pitched on Monday. They probably were not good for much more than one inning each. Ian Lowry was sent to the bullpen as the 15th began to get warmed up. The Titans somehow still had sticks on the bench, and Sergio Leon hit a pinch-hit single off Nava in the 15th but was left on base. This had in fact been their last pinch-hitting option and they were also down to remaining relievers, Aiden Shaw, who began the 15th, and Jose Gomez, who had pitched on Monday, which seemed very long ago by now. Portland wrung out Nava for a second inning in the 16th, after which a starting pitcher, Tony Gaytan, batted for him in the bottom of the inning. Hey, he kept telling every ******* batter on the roster that he had a Platinum Stick, maybe show your work here!? Gaytan with one out singled to right, which raised his average all the way to .091, and then moved up 90 feet on Flowe’s single. Otal hit another single to left, and there was no holding the runner there, just send it and end it! Gonzales’ throw from left was off line, Gaytan slid in save, and the Raccoons had won the battle despite being in utter disarray for most of 16 innings…! 9-8 Critters!! Fumero 3-8, RBI; Katzman 3-6, 2 BB, 2 2B, RBI; Morejon 3-8, RBI; van Otterdijk 2-4; Brown (PH) 1-1; Gaytan (PH) 1-1; Flowe 2-6, BB, 2B; Yocum (PH) 1-1, 2B, RBI; Otal 3-5, 2B, RBI; Nava 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K, W (1-0);

Whoah! I am equal amounts tired and excited!

The Titans managed to lose a game in which they hit four homers and allowed none.

The bullpen obviously did not look great for Wednesday. Nava and Rios were off limits, and Valentin a “please don’t”. With Lowry pitching, that was a bit of an issue. Jamie Colter (.167, 0 HR, 0 RBI) ended up getting sent down just so we could get a spare arm up, which turned out to be right-hander Juan Vega, who was perhaps not the smoothest option, but at least well rested.

Speaking of rest, whilst we were now tied with the Titans for first place, the marathon commanded that we give Tyler Wharton his day off to rest his middle-aged bones. Gallo would rest against Riddle on Thursday. Flowe also was off after catching all 16 innings of that bonanza.

Game 3
BOS: SS E. Gonzales – RF M. Garcia – 3B D. Miller – C D. Johnson – 1B Goodwin – 2B Jer. White – LF S. Leon – CF Robichaud – P M. Bell
POR: 2B Fumero – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – 3B Gallo – RF Corral – CF Otal – LF van Otterdijk – C Brown – P Lowry

Garcia and Katzman exchanged solo homers from the #2 spots in the first inning, but that wasn’t even beginning to describe how Lowry was getting *whacked*. The Titans rung him for three more runs, two on a Robichaud homer, and then another one on two more screamers after that. We were already giving up on the game before Lowry allowed singles to Goodwin and White in the third inning and then Katz fumbled Leon’s grounder for an error. Robichaud’s comebacker was taken for the second out at home by Lowry, but the double play was not completed and the bags remained loaded. Bell then singled in a run and Gonzales added two more – those being unearned – before Garcia popped out to Fumero.

Down 7-1, the game was obviously totally in the bin and we might just as well use up Lowry’s pitch count now, then try to get as many innings as possible from Vega before sending him back, and hope to reset our pen. Lowry ended up pitching another three scoreless innings after the early shellacking, which didn’t really help because Bell was turning in a 3-hitter to live up to his ace status after a rough start to the season. Vega pitched two innings, allowing another 2-run homer to Gonzales in the eighth, not that it made much of a difference anymore. Edgar Gutierrez was then taken deep by Danny Miller for a solo homer in the ninth. The Coons gave up another four homers, while Bell gave up five hits in a complete-game effort. 10-1 Titans. Katzman 2-4, HR, RBI;

Vega (9.00 ERA) was right off the roster again. The Raccoons instead promoted 23-year-old LF/CF Jesus Guerrero, hitting .272 in AAA. The right-handed hitter had been signed for $270k in the 2063 July IFA window. He was also only expected to be a placeholder until Josh Mireles would come off the DL next week.

Katz was sore on Thursday, so both him and Gallo were not in the lineup for the series finale.

Game 4
BOS: SS E. Gonzales – RF M. Garcia – 3B D. Miller – 1B Goodwin – 2B Jer. White – C Heath – LF Padgett – CF Robichaud – P Riddle
POR: SS Yocum – 2B Fumero – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – LF Guerrero – 3B J. Davis – C Flowe – P Walla

Walla gave up a double to Garcia in the first, and a leadoff double to White in the second. That runner scored with the help of an infield single by Josh Heath and then Padgett’s run-scoring 6-4-3 double play. The Raccoons got an Otter double with one out in the bottom 2nd and then Riddle walked the bags full with the debutant Guerrero and Jacob Davis. Flowe lined out and Walla struck out to leave them all orderly on base. Bottom 3rd, Yocum singled, as did Fumero. Yocum aggressively went to third base, and Garcia’s throw was poor, and so Fumero managed to get to second base behind him, all with nobody out. Morejon tied the game with a groundout, but Wharton grounded out to third and pinned Fumero, who was stranded when van Otterdijk flew out to left.

Nick Walla had threatened to fall over for the entirety of yet another outing, and finally did in the fifth inning, which began with a K on Heath, but then Padgett legged out an infield single on a drag bunt. Robichaud popped out, and then crucially Walla couldn’t ******* get rid of Riddle with two outs AND two strikes, the pitcher singled, and then the Titans ripped another three straight singles and plated four runs……

Down 5-1 in the eighth and being three-hit by the former Raccoon Riddle, Katzman batted for Ramirez to lead off the bottom 8th and reached on an error by White. Yocum singled, and the tying run appeared in the on-deck circle with nobody out. Mike Rocheford replaced Riddle and got a fly out from Fumero, then yielded for Travis Davis, who got a fly out from Morejon. Edgar Cornejo then flew out Wharton to right and it was all pointless again. McMahan held the line in the ninth before Joe Cash walked van Otterdijk, whiffed up Guerrero, and then walked Jacob Davis and was replaced with Gleason. There was no other right-handed stick on the bench (except for Gallo, who didn’t hit left-handers either), and so Otal batted for Flowe, singled through the right side to plate the Otter, and now Gallo batted for the pitcher as the tying run, but grounded out poorly. The runners moved up, but Yocum popped out to end the game. 5-2 Titans. Yocum 2-4, BB; Otal (PH) 1-1, RBI;

All-out awful…

Raccoons (23-19) vs. Falcons (18-22) – May 23-25, 2070

The Coons had drowned 2-7 against the Falcons last season, with the hope that it would get better this year, because it could hardly get worse. The Falcons had taken the red lantern in scoring from the Portlanders this year, plating only 3.2 runs a game so far, and gave up the fourth-most for a -52 run differential. They had the very worst bullpen, and were in the bottom three in all major offensive stats. The defense also sucked. The rotation was doing its best to hang in there. Edgar Mauricio and Paul Weber were notable DL dwellers.

Projected matchups:
Tony Gaytan (3-3, 2.82 ERA) vs. Ayahito Ochi (5-1, 1.75 ERA)
Vinny Morales (5-2, 3.42 ERA) vs. Gary Peoples (1-1, 4.19 ERA)
Jimmy Wharton (3-2, 3.52 ERA) vs. Jack Moses (2-2, 4.79 ERA)

Ochi was the only lefty starter they had. They had also been off on Thursday, so they could skip Carlos Gomez (1-2, 3.15 ERA) into the series if they so desired.

Game 1
CHA: SS Tr. Taylor – 2B Bazua – C O. Matos – 1B A. Metz – RF Terrell – LF T. Lopez – CF A. Campbell – 3B Moquin – P Ochi
POR: 2B Yocum – 1B Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – 3B Gallo – LF Guerrero – C S. Brown – P Gaytan

Gaytan allowed a leadoff double to Trent Taylor and walked Andy Metz, but pulled through the first inning when Brady Terrell grounded out to first. The Coons in turn stole three bases between Yocum, Fumero, and Wharton in the first inning, but only scored one run on a Katz sac fly before van Otterdijk lined out and Gallo grounded out to leave two in scoring position. Both Adam Campbell and Mike Moquin nearly hit homers (ending up with F9’s) off Gaytan, who looked not on, struck out nobody the first time through, and much the contrary, allowed a leadoff single to Ochi in the third, walked Taylor, and gave up another single to Raul Bazua. Oscar Matos tied the game with a 6-4-3 double-whammy, and Metz almost blew a whole through Fumero with a very sharp spanker, but was out 3-U after Fumero had collected himself, stranding the go-ahead run on third base.

Yocum and Fumero reached base to begin both the third and fifth innings – which made three times already in the game – and were stranded with nothing but wet farts from the 3-4-5 array in the third inning, but Katz at least walked to fill ‘em up in the fifth. Wharton hadn’t socked a good one in a while, fell down 0-2 against Ochi, but then strung one past Metz and up the line for a 2-run double to break the tie in that inning. Van Otterdijk whiffed, Gallo plated a run with a groundout, and Guerrero’s groundout ended the inning. Gaytan then walked Metz to begin the sixth, which gave him three walks in this start, almost outlandish in 2069 terms, but struck out Terrell and got a double play from Tony Lopez to Katzman.

Drops began to fall in the bottom 6th, although it never really started to seriously rain; the weather just chose to be annoying. Gaytan issued another leadoff walk to Taylor in the eighth, but again got a double play grounder from Bazua, and Matos flew out easily to Wharton to somehow complete eight for Gaytan even when he looked completely lost. He handed the ball directly to Valentin, who gave up a homer to Terrell, but the cushion was big enough. 4-2 Coons. Yocum 3-4, 2B; Fumero 1-2, BB; Gaytan 8.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 4 BB, 3 K, W (4-3);

First start of eight innings and one run allowed by a Raccoon in a while where I had to seriously consider whether he deserved the postgame shoutout. That was *awful*. Three double play turned behind him to make up for the complete lack of direction.

We were also getting out-dingered 9-2 this week at this point, and 13-5 for the entire homestand. Shambolic.

Game 2
CHA: J. Brown – SS Tr. Taylor – C O. Matos – 1B A. Metz – RF Terrell – LF T. Lopez – CF A. Campbell – 3B Moquin – P Peoples
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – LF Otal – C Flowe – P Morales

Saturday’s game began with a 2-base throwing error by Gallo on a Josh Brown grounder and an unearned run on the subsequent groundouts by Taylor and Matos, to which the Raccoons had no immediate response, amounting to only one hit the first time through. Yocum singled with two gone in the third, but was also left on, and by then the Coons were down 2-0 on a third-inning run – earned – from Taylor and Metz hits. Wharton came up with a 1-out double in the fourth against Peoples, and made for home when Corral single. Terrell threw away the ball on the play and Corral moved to second base with the tying run, but was stranded there on meh outs by Gallo and Otal.

So the offense sucked, and the pitching sucked as well; Morales lumbered into the sixth before giving up 2-out hits to Lopez and Campbell. He had Mike Moquin at 0-2, then gave up a 2-run knock to right, and that buried him 4-1 down. Brown grounded out to begin the seventh, but then Taylor singled, stole second and reached third when Flowe’s throw bounced and got away from Katzman, and Matos drew a 4-pitch walk. Morales was yanked, and Rios gave up a run on Metz’ sac fly to center before ringing up Terrell. Peoples was still in the game and looked pretty fine until Otal singled in the bottom 7th and with two outs van Otterdijk, who had entered in a double switch with Rios at Corral’s expense, hit a 2-run homer, the first Coons longball in four days. Yocum then doubled, but Katzman made the third out.

The tying runs were on the corners then in the bottom 8th in Fumero (who forced out Morejon while PH’ing) and Gallo, and two outs. We sent Guerrero to pinch-hit against the left-handed Scott Bickerton, but the Falcons answered with right-hander Freddie DeWitt. Guerrero flew out to Tony Lopez, and was 0-for-7 to begin his career. Edgar Gutierrez held the Falcons in the ninth, and their 2-run lead went to Orazio Cecere in the bottom 9th. Flowe led off with a single, but then two soggy outs were made before Katz walked and brought Morejon up as the winning run. Morejon hit a high fly to center, but it was no trouble for Adam Campbell. 5-3 Falcons. Yocum 2-5, 2B; T. Wharton 2-4, 2B; van Otterdijk 1-2, HR, 2 RBI;

(sigh!)

Game 3
CHA: 2B J. Brown – 3B Moquin – SS T. Taylor – C O. Matos – RF Terrell – 1B A. Metz – LF T. Lopez – CF A. Campbell – P Moses
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – 3B Fumero – RF Corral – LF Guerrero – C Flowe – P J. Wharton

Offense was a bit of a nope in the early innings, with Jimmy Wharton facing the minimum the first time through, walking Tony Lopez but getting him doubled off in the third inning. The Raccoons were not much better against Jack Moses, but in the fourth got Katzman on with a leadoff single and then Tyler Wharton socked a home run for the first time in a bit, putting Team Wharton up 2-0. Yocum doubled home Flowe to extend the lead in the third inning, while Jimmy Wharton was still no-hitting the Falcons into the sixth inning before first giving up a single to the opposing pitcher, an RBI single to Moquin, and then blew the entire lead when he put Taylor on base with balls, and then gave up a gap double to Matos for a 3-all score………

Wharton gave up a leadoff double to PH Isaiah Birth, a former Coons prospect, to begin the seventh, and that runner ended up being waved in by Ramirez on a hit by Rodger Houkes (who!?), so the Coons were now trailing at the stretch, but with two outs and nobody on in the bottom 7th, J.P. Gallo batted for Jimmy Wharton, doubled to left-center, and then scored on a Yocum single to get all even at four. Katz also singled, but Morejon grounded out.

The Coons wasted another two singles in the eighth inning, including the first career hit by Jesus Guerrero after an 0-10 start to his major league days (literally), then sent Holzmeister against the Falcons’ bottom of the order after Nava had held the game tied in the top 8th. Holzmeister walked Birth on straight balls, which was awesome, but the Falcons then grounded out twice and PH Carlos Mora popped out to leave the chance untaken. Benito Otal pinch-hit in the #9 spot to begin the bottom 9th against righty Jose Lugo, but was the first of three straight groundouts to send the game to extras.

Valentin faced the minimum in the tenth, which glossed over a bit of brushing Moquin with a pitch, but the runner then being caught stealing. Morejon then hit a single to begin the bottom 10th against Lugo. He was in motion when Wharton grounded out to short, which prevented a double play, and Fumero ended up walking. When Jose Corral slapped a single through the right side, Morejon got a good jump and Isaiah Birth had little arm to offer as makeshift rightfielder, and the game ended on the walkoff single as Morejon slid in well safe for a walkoff. 5-4 Coons. Yocum 2-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Katzman 2-5; Fumero 2-4, BB; Corral 2-4, BB, RBI; Gallo (PH) 1-1, 2B;

In other news

May 20 – The Indians get burned by the Canadiens, 17-0, and VAN SP Dallas Samson (1-2, 2.58 ERA) throws a 2-hit shutout while also clipping three singles. VAN C/1B Jonathan Contreras (.336, 5 HR, 29 RBI) tops the team with four hits and drives in two runs.
May 20 – The Blue Sox beat the Buffaloes, 4-3 in 14 innings, but Sox catcher Francisco Roviva (.147, 0 HR, 4 RBI) goes 0-for-7 with six strikeouts for a … what even? Titanium Sombrero??
May 22 – The Scorpions trade their closer George Kehoe (1-0, 2.81 ERA, 8 SV) to the Rebels for two prospects.
May 23 – L.A. beats the Blue Sox, 6-5 in 13 innings. Both teams already scored a run in the 11th inning to keep the game going.
May 24 – The Wolves take ten innings to beat the Buffaloes, 1-0, and there’s no RBI. Salem has Tyrese Armstrong (.308, 5 HR, 15 RBI) and Oscar Aredondo (.400, 0 HR, 2 RBI) on second and first in the bottom 10th, respectively when during a double steal attempt Buffos catcher Casey Gorz (.074, 0 HR, 3 RBI) throws the ball away and Armstrong comes around to score.
May 25 – NAS INF Jordan Sellman (.318, 8 HR, 18 RBI) will be out for a month after suffering an oblique strain.

Player of the Week (FL): DEN OF Chris Tuck (.391, 2 HR, 14 RBI), batting .565 (13-23) with 2 HR, 4 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): OCT 2B/SS Jose Palominos (.302, 10 HR, 29 RBI), striking .423 (11-26) with 3 HR, 8 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Morejon needs replacing with Moreoffense… (grumbles)

There’s so many people on the team that aren’t ******* hitting it’s not even funny. We will need Fumero to play every day at whatever position presents itself just to have HALF a functioning lineup. We barely played a winning homestand (7-6) and there are problems everywhere. Somehow we’re only one game out of first place right now, but keep in mind there’s no money to fix issues on the trade market, and no prospects either at this point.

Val Centeno has returned to the mound but his first outings in AAA have been … depressing, to say the least. ERA of nine, and small change, almost as many walks as strikeouts, and a .351 BABIP will go only so far for explanations. So he’s not gonna help with anything either… Other pitching hopes like Pacheco (out of control) and Victor Chavez are also doing badly.

The only AAA pitchers that I would like to mention positively at this point were Harrison Hunt for starters, who had a 2.84 ERA and almost 3.5 K/BB; and Steve George, who was swingmanning it for a 2.45 ERA and nearly 3 K/BB. Hunt had been up briefly and rather disastrously last year, while George was a right-hander from Cali we had taken in the second round in ’65. He had hung around Ham Lake for quite a while but was now materializing as an option on the horizon. Good slider, maybe not enough of an arsenal overall to make it in the majors, and the stamina was also not great (8). Then again, Vinny Morales came up as an “oh ****, oh ****, oh ****” stopgap in early ’68, has a very similar scouting report, and has been doing quite alright for the last 67 starts in the majors (ignoring the hideous cup of coffee he had in ’66).

Monday is a much needed day off. We’re on the road next week with a trip to the Bay of Horrors, and then we can gamble away the division during a weekend in Vegas. There’s another Monday off after that and then another 2-week homestand with 13 straight games. After those 26 home games in five weeks we’ll only have 17 home games from mid-June to the end of July, and only nine in all of August.

Fun Fact: Dallas’ Omar Sanchez, who is only entering games as pinch-hitter and -runner at age 40, announced his retirement at season’s end.

The three-time CL batting champion and 2060 CL Player of the Year who tortured us for 19 years as a Crusader is still tied with Lonzo for most stolen bases of all time, 752 each.

[Westheim]

2070 DRAFT POOL ANALYSIS

Pitchers, pitchers, pitchers!! That’s how the 2070 draft pool felt, because there was an abundance of hurlers with at least some promise, while the selection of batters was quite thin compared to that. This reflected in the annual shortlist compiled by Oscar Semchez and his underlings, which in a rare occurrence had more pitchers (65) than batters (64) – barely. To be completely open about it, five of the pitchers were marginal two-way players, only one of whom was also listed as a batter. The most notable of this group was perhaps a right-hander from Texas named Dan McPartland that was listed as an infielder, but – oh! – that curveball! He even made the hotlist. Speaking of which …

Oh, behold of the pitching riches on the dozen-or-so hotlist (*high school players):

SP Nick Dry (14/13/13) – BNN #4
SP Jamie Dutton (13/14/11) – BNN #10
SP Ryan Neville (12/15/10) * – BNN #7
SP Eric Feeback (11/15/15) *
SP Dan Miceli (11/13/12)
SP Jalen McCorkle (13/12/13)
SP Ruben Cabrera (12/13/11) – BNN #9
SP Cameron Cofield (12/13/14) – BNN #3

CL David Griffin (17/13/9)
CL Dan McPartland (17/14/8) *

C/1B Marty Weaver (11/12/7) * – BNN #5

INF Chris Sandidge (13/12/13) * – BNN #6
3B/LF/1B Jason Hill (10/10/12)
1B Matt King (13/2/11) *

OF Brian Johnson (11/10/11)
OF Danny Stokes (12/9/14) *

Yeah, no, I just couldn’t contain myself. That’s a rather big hotlist, and there’s another half dozen or more pitchers with only marginally worse ratings or with only two good pitches that will almost certainly make for decent major leaguers.

BNN’s #1 selection was Nick Roseto jr., a right-handed pitcher that was on the shortlist as well, and who was the son of former journeyman infielder Nick Roseto. One of his six career stops was Milwaukee, but he batted only .249 with 25 homers in 678 career games. Semchez rated Roseto a 12/12/9, which would make him an interesting selection at the end of the first round in a “normal” pitching year. Perhaps not so much this time around!

The Raccoons will come picking with five picks in the top 70, headed by the #13 and #32 selections. I’m pretty certain the top pick is gonna be a pitcher. Sandidge, who was probably going to be a third baseman going forward thanks to a strong throwing arm and not so much range up the middle, is the only position player that I would forego one of the starting pitchers listed for, and given the paucity of good hitting talent, I have serious doubts he’s gonna be passed on a dozen times.

This is gonna be an exciting draft!

[Westheim]

Normal service resumes soon here after another update (I would think) tomorrow. I poke my head in the stupid office on Monday, but Tuesday is one last holiday here. After that the pokey black nose is fully back on the grindstone.

+++

Raccoons (25-20) @ Bayhawks (16-29) – May 27-29, 2070

The Baybirds were the bottom-feeding team in the Continental League. They scored the fifth-fewest runs, but allowed the most, and their rotation was getting shellacked for a 5.39 ERA, also the worst in the league. Their run differential was -40, and they were also powerless with the second-fewest homers in the league for that team. Well, you can barely *not* homer against *our* team! The Raccoons had won this season series eight years running, 5-4 in 2069.

Projected matchups:
Ian Lowry (3-3, 4.94 ERA) vs. Kelly Whitney (1-6, 6.59 ERA)
Nick Walla (4-4, 4.80 ERA) vs. Billy Thompson (2-4, 6.75 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (4-3, 2.62 ERA) vs. Liberio Ivo (2-5, 4.97 ERA)

All right-handers; Ivo had led the league in losses ahead of Nick Walla in 2069, but so far this year didn’t even crack the top 2 on his own team, as Aaron Ledbetter was 2-7 with a 4.69 ERA… Combined, the Baybirds starters were responsible for 26 of the team’s 29 losses; the baby was usually already down the drain with the bath water once the bullpen got involved.

The stint of Jesus Guerrero, batting 1-for-11, already came to an end as Josh Mireles came off the DL for the Tuesday opener.

Game 1
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P Lowry
SFB: 2B Bruce – 3B K. Ball – LF Streng – RF J. Ward – 1B Whetstine – CF Redding – C H. Valdez – SS Murcia – P Whitney

The Coons went down in order in the first but Keith Ball, Ian Streng, and Jake Ward filled the bags with straight singles against Lowry before former Elks foe Chad Whetstine hacked himself out and Ryan Redding bounced out to Gallo, preventing any runs from being scored. After that lucky escape you’d hope for some offense from the brown team, which didn’t arrive, and instead the Baybirds went up 2-0 in the third inning on Ryan Bruce’s leadoff triple and RBI knocks from Streng and Whetstine (grumble grumble). Whitney then walked Fumero in celebration and gave up a double to Katzman to begin the fourth, which put the tying runs on the plate for Big Wharton, who popped out to Whetstine in foul ground, but Jerry Morejon got his weekly base hit in early and singled to center, getting both runners home for a tied game. Corral grounded out, but foundering J.P. Gallo cranked a go-ahead homer to right with two outs.

The Coons then set up a big inning when they had the bases loaded in the fifth with nobody out as Whitney allowed a single to Lowry, walked Yocum, and then gave away another single to Fumero. Katz got a run home the worst way with a 6-4-3 double play grounder, and Wharton flew out to Redding, and that was that “big” inning. Lowry had another scoreless inning, but then walked Ward and Whetstine to begin the bottom 6th, was yanked for Nava, but the right-hander was not very effective and conceded the runs on a pair of groundouts that each advanced the on-base threats, and then a 2-out RBI double by Rafael Murcia. Pinch-hitting Ray Efird grounded out to end the inning, Portland now ahead just 5-4.

Reliever Alan Deakin offered consecutive 1-out walks to Katz and Wharton in the eighth inning. Morejon grounded into a fielder’s choice at second against the left-hander, while van Otterdijk batted for Corral with two down, rolled one up the middle, but Murcia didn’t get to quickly enough to have a play, and the Coons scratched out an insurance run on the infield single. Gallo whiffed, and McMahan and Gutierrez between them then gave up four singles and the tying runs in the bottom of the inning. Angelo Ramirez held the Coons off base in the ninth, while Victor Ramirez allowed a single to Jake Ward, who stole second to move the winning run to scoring position, but also struck out Streng, Whetstine, and Redding to send the game to extra innings.

An error by Streng, who dropped Katz’ 1-out fly to left for two bases, gave the Raccoons a chance in the top of the tenth. San Fran declined to pitch to Wharton, who was put on first, and a Morejon single loaded the bases for the Otter, who flew out to shallow left, and then Gallo, who flew out to center, and another three runners were senselessly stranded. Rios retired the bottom of the homeowner’s lineup in order in the bottom 10th, then struck out trying to bunt Jake Flowe and his leadoff single to second in the 11th… Yocum singled off right-hander Luis Morales, but Fumero popped out to second and Katz grounded out to drive me up the wall. The Coons appeared to finally clinch the L they were yearning for in that inning when Rios walked Bruce leading off. Bruce advanced on a groundout by Ball, Streng popped out, but Ward singled to center. Bruce went for home, as did Wharton – and he hammered him out at the plate to keep the ******* game going!!

Wharton singled to left to begin the 12th before being caught stealing … and then Morejon doubled. The Coons still managed to FINALLY SCORE A ******* RUN on Gallo’s 2-out single, breaking a very annoying 6-6 tie. Flowe lobbed one over to Ward, and then Valentin came in, nailed Whetstine with an 0-2 pitch, and the Bayhawks sent pinch-runner Danny Aguilar, who was nevertheless doubled up on Redding’s grounder to short. Hugo Valdez struck out. 7-6 Critters. T. Wharton 2-4, 2 BB; Morejon 4-6, 2B, 2 RBI; van Otterdijk (PH) 1-3, RBI; Gallo 2-6, HR, 3 RBI; Rios 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 1 K, W (2-0);

Just after an off day we managed to use the entire bullpen in a stupidly long game to barely beat the worst team in the league.

Brilliant.

BUT – because the Titans managed to lose twice against the Knights by now, the Raccoons jumped into first place by finally crawling over the Baybirds!

Game 2
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Brown – P Walla
SFB: 2B Bruce – 3B K. Ball – LF Streng – RF J. Ward – 1B Whetstine – CF Redding – C H. Valdez – SS Murcia – P B. Thompson

The Coons took the lead almost instantly on Wednesday as Thompson walked Yocum, who stole second and then scored on a 3-1 single by Fumero, who would also score on a 2-out single by Morejon, and then Jose Corral pumped a homer to right, 4-0! Now we just needed Nick Walla to find his stuff again! San Fran started with an infield single by Bruce and a proper single by Ball, but Streng was rung up and Ward hit into a double play for what it was worth. Meanwhile, in the second inning, Sam Brown doubled to lead off, advanced on a wild pitch, and scored on an error by Bruce on Yocum’s grounder to make it 5-0. Yocum stole another base, but was left on this time.

Things were looking *fine* at this point. Ray Efird batted for Thompson to begin the bottom 3rd and singled, and that was the horn sounding the rally. Bruce walked in a full count, the runners stole a pair of bases and thus stayed out of a potential double play on Ball’s run-scoring groundout. Streng singled in a run, Ward singled, Walla threw a wild pitch, but rung up Whetstine for the second out… and then did not retire anybody else after that. Double, single, single, double, 7-5 San Francisco, hook. Victor Ramirez got Bruce out, but the damage was very much done.

After Ramirez facing only one batter, the Raccoons went to Edgar Gutierrez dearly hoping for a long outing. He pitched two shutout innings before Brown got on base ahead of him with one out in the sixth. Gutierrez remained in to bunt the runner over, and a pair of RBI knocks by Yocum and Fumero tied the game at seven from there. Katzman whiffed, his third strikeout in the game. In the seventh, right-hander Juan Arauz allowed a leadoff single to Wharton, then walked the bags full with the 5-6 batters for Gallo. His single through the right side broke a messy tie for the second game in a row, 8-7, and lefty Alan Deakin replaced Arauz. Brown hit into a double play, 1-2-3, and Gutierrez struck out, but pitched another inning, before he was replaced with Nava, who blew the lead in the bottom 8th by allowing leadoff singles to Valdez and PH Brett Haus. Two groundouts plated the lead runner, Ball hit another single to put runners on the corners, and Nava allowed two more RBI singles to Streng and Ward before being kicked off the mound. Holzmeister got the last out, but Angelo Ramirez pitched a 1-2-3 ninth. 10-8 Bayhawks. Fumero 4-5, 2B, 2 RBI; Gallo 2-5, RBI; Brown 2-4, 2B; Gutierrez 4.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K;

Stupid ******* **** *** team.

Luis Silva, something HAS to be wrong with Walla and I suggest you better find it!

The Raccoons direly needed a fresh arm and optioned Holzmeister (0-1, 2.08 ERA) to make room for Mike Davis, who totally fit the description of somebody who could pitch some garbage innings if more **** hit more fans.

Game 3
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P Gaytan
SFB: 2B Bruce – 3B K. Ball – LF Streng – RF J. Ward – 1B Whetstine – CF Redding – C H. Valdez – SS Murcia – P Ivo

For the second day in a row Yocum got on and was driven in by Fumero, this time with a double into the gap, for a quick 1-0 lead, but the Raccoons did not add to that tally this time. Gaytan retired the first six Baybirds in order before hitting a leadoff single in the third inning. A wild pitch moved him to second base, and he scored easily on Yocum’s double up the leftfield line to make it 2-0. Groundouts by Fumero and Katzman didn’t get the runner home, but Tyler Wharton socking a 400-footer surely did and doubled the score. Morejon upped to 5-0 by going back-to-back and Corral hit another single, but was left on base by Gallo. Hugo Valdez doubled to begin the bottom 3rd, but was left on base with poor outs by the 8-9-1 batters, including Efird pinch-hitting for Ivo already. A Whetstine double and Valdez single did however get San Fran on the board in the fifth inning. Murcia hit another single, but Daniel Aguilar and Bruce then made poor outs to let Gaytan get away, although that inning exploded his pitch count to 85.

Keith Ball hit another leadoff double in the sixth and was stranded, but after Streng K’ed, Ward and Whetstine were only retired by Corral and Wharton running backwards to make catches, respectively. For Portland, Gallo had hit a leadoff single off Brad Yoxall in the sixth, had stolen second, and been stranded. In the seventh, Fumero hit a leadoff single off Yoxall, stole second, and … well at least Katz drew a walk before being forced out on Wharton’s grounder, but Morejon’s pop and Corral’s groundout prevented runs from being scored just as well.

The Coons managed to push Gaytan through seven innings, and with the 5-1 lead still standing, which made him a hot candidate for the best start of the week already, then had another leadoff man (Gallo) on base against Ricardo Orta in the eighth and ****** away that runner, too. McMahan got two outs in the eighth before Mike Davis replaced him. He struck out Streng to end the bottom 8th, but in the ninth got two outs only before issuing his second walk to Whetstine and Valdez and Valentin came into the game after all. He got Murcia to ground out to Gallo to end the game. 5-1 Raccoons. Yocum 2-5, 2B, RBI; Fumero 2-5, 2B, RBI; T. Wharton 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; Gaytan 7.0 IP, 6 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 5 K, W (5-3) and 1-3;

Raccoons (27-21) @ Aces (30-16) – May 30-June 1, 2070

After the sloppy play on display for the last three days I had little hope for any good things in Vegas on the weekend. The Aces were actually the second-worst pitching team in the league, but that was not a guarantee for those Raccoons to come out on top. They had a 4-game winning streak, were 18-7 in May, and were scoring the second-most runs in the CL, so we were surely doomed. They were hitting .287 as a team, had the second-most homers, and the most stolen bases. RIP Coons. Vegas had won two of three when these teams first met this year, but they had lost outfielders Vic Lorenzo and Alfredo Rosado to injury.

Projected matchups:
Vinny Morales (5-3, 3.52 ERA) vs. Ignazio Flores (4-2, 5.02 ERA)
Jimmy Wharton (3-2, 3.75 ERA) vs. Tim Henderson (3-2, 3.86 ERA)
Ian Lowry (3-3, 5.16 ERA) vs. Danny Ryba (2-3, 3.20 ERA)

Flores was the only left-hander in the rotation, and the only 5+ ERA pitcher we’d get to see here.

Game 1
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF van Otterdijk – 3B J. Davis – C Flowe – P Morales
LVA: SS Hatakeyama – 1B A. Jones – C Haynes – CF Phelps – 2B C. Cervantez – 3B Rodewald – RF Caceres – LF J. Parker – P I. Flores

Another day, another quick start, and while Yocum and Fumero made outs to begin the game, Katz’ single and Wharton’s tenth homer of the year still gave Portland a 2-0 lead. A Morejon single and van Otterdijk’s RBI double even made it 3-0 before we sent our own tosser out there and I closed my eyes. Adam Jones singled, but was doubled up by Chris Haynes in the first inning, before Josh Phelps opened the bottom 2nd with a homer to left. Matt Rodewald and Johnny Parker both hit singles in the inning, but Rodewald was thrown out trying to go first-to-third on the latter hit, on a rare awesome throw by van Otterdijk, and that ended the inning.

Morales didn’t have his 5-run meltdown until the fourth inning, which the Aces began with straight singles from their 4-through-8 batters, which already plated three runs. Morales then himself threw away Flores’ grounder for an error, allowing Jorge Caceres to score, and setting up a sac fly for Koji Hatakeyama. Jones and Haynes then made the last two outs in the ******* inning, and Vegas was up 6-3.

Suddenly, a reaction from the Coons, who had slept for three innings after taking the lead. Yocum got on and was forced out by Fumero, but Katzman bashed a 2-piece to left, 6-5. Wharton singled, but Morejon’s fly into the gap was rushed down by Phelps and the inning didn’t lead to any more runs when van Otterdijk grounded out. Morales gave up another run in the bottom 5th when he surrendered a triple to Carlos Cervantez, who scored on Rodewald’s groundout, then was sent to bed without another pass by the cookie jar.

The Coons made up another run to 7-6 in the sixth against an assortment of relievers; Fumero drove in Mireles with a 2-out single, but Katzman grounded out to leave him and Yocum on base. Mike Davis and Danny Nava pitched scoreless innings out of the #7 spot afterwards, and Corral drew a leadoff walk in that spot to begin the eighth against Mel Guerra, who was then replaced with lefty Gabe Molina. Flowe couldn’t get a bunt down, then hit into a double play on 0-2 (…) before Mireles singled. Yocum grounded out to leave him on base against righty Pedro Negron. McMahan held the score close in the bottom 8th, and the Aces sent right-hander Chris Derrick and his 1.61 ERA against the 2-3-4 batters in the ninth. Fumero’s fly to left was caught by Johnny Parker, but Katzman’s dropped in next to the line for a double, putting the tying run on second base. Groundouts by Wharton and Morejon then put the game in the loss column for good. 7-6 Aces. Katzman 3-5, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; T. Wharton 3-5, HR, 2 RBI; Flowe 2-4, 2B;

Why are our starters to ******* useless???

A Titans W led to a virtual tie at the top of the CL North, with the Loggers only half a game behind after splitting a double header with the Thunder that had been conjured up by a rainout in April.

Game 2
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P J. Wharton
LVA: SS Hatakeyama – 1B A. Jones – C Haynes – CF Phelps – 2B C. Cervantez – 3B Rodewald – RF Caceres – LF J. Williams – P T. Henderson

Yocum singled, stole second, and … was stranded on three sucky outs in the first inning, ending the Coons’ early-offense streak. Nobody scored before Jorge Caceres ran into the sidewall as he caught a fly ball by Jake Flowe to end the top 2nd; he left the game and was replaced with Parker, who was the only K for Jimmy Wharton the first time through, while issuing two walks and a few rockets.

Portland *did* go up 1-0 in the third when Yocum hit a 1-out triple over Josh Phelps and scored on Fumero’s groundout. Katz singled, but Tyler Wharton whiffed, and the other Wharton immediately pissed the lead away by allowing a single to Jones, a walk to Haynes, and an RBI single to Phelps, all with two gone in the bottom of the same inning. Cervantez then was out on a comebacker.

In the fourth, Morejon singled and stole a base, yet was stranded, while Jimmy Wharton put Rodewald on base by drilling him to begin the inning, and then conceded that go-ahead run on nothing other than a 2-out double by the ******* opposing pitcher. At least Yocum kept trying and hit another single and stole his tenth base to begin the fifth. Fumero popped out, but Katz hit an infield single to put them on the corners. Tyler Wharton then slapped one right into a double play, while the other Wharton was no less annoying and gave up homers to Haynes (#17!) and Cervantez in the bottom 5th. Little Wharton was yanked after putting two on in the sixth, leaving Ramirez to sort through his ****, and while the right-hander achieved that, he also surrendered a run in the seventh after Phelps reached on an uncaught third strike, because Jake Flowe felt like he should definitely chip in some uselessness of his own, and a Parker double. 5-1 Aces. Yocum 3-4, 3B; Katzman 2-4; Morejon 2-4;

Everybody atop the silly North lost on Saturday, so we remained in the virtual tie (they had played two fewer games) with Boston.

There was a roster move on Sunday, since we were in no mood for another one of Lowry’s ****** outings. Harrison Hunt was called up for a spot start on Sunday, taking the spot of Mike Davis, who had pitched two scoreless innings.

Game 3
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – 3B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – SS Mireles – C Brown – P Hunt
LVA: SS Hatakeyama – LF J. Williams – C Haynes – CF Phelps – 2B C. Cervantez – 3B Rodewald – 1B L. Jimenez – RF McFadden – P Ryba

Two singles and a walk loaded the bags to begin the Sunday game, and then three outs were made in order, but at least Wharton’s groundout to third and Morejon’s sac fly each got a run home for a 2-0 lead. Hunt didn’t explode on sight, giving up a hit to Haynes, who had just taken Batter of the Month for May, but the top 2nd began with Sam Brown walking. He advanced on a Hunt bunt, and Yocum’s sharp RBI single made it 3-0. Fumero grounded out to end the inning, and Katz did so to start the third, but then Wharton singled and Morejon hit a ground-rule double onto the warning track and over the wall in left. Ryba rung up Corral, and Mireles lined out to Rodewald, and once again nobody ******* scored. Instead the Aces got on the board in the bottom 3rd. Katz made an error that put Jon McFadden on, and a bunt and Hatakeyama’s single plated an unearned run, 3-1. Yocum tripled in the fourth, but the Raccoons scored no runs.

Hunt walked two, but bailed out with the help of Rodewald, who was caught stealing, in the bottom 4th, the first inning in which he really seemed to struggle. Hatakeyama and Williams hit 2-out singles in the fifth, but Haynes, down 1-2, hit a sharp grounder right at Yocum for the third out.

No Coon reached until Yocum singled in the seventh, but was forced out by Fumero’s grounder to short, and Katz then popped out. Hunt completed seven innings of 4-hit ball, and held on to the 3-1 lead in the second-best start of the week, and that was saying much less than what it sounded like.

Wharton drew a leadoff walk off Negron to begin the eighth, but was left on first base by the next three batters all failing away merrily. Corral at least hit a long fly to the edge of the warning track. Bottom 8th, and Gutierrez allowed an infield single to Hakateyama right away, and then an RBI triple to Williams. Haynes popped one up in foul ground, but Brown dropped that one for an error, but Gutierrez held on to get a K from Haynes with the tying run on third base. Phelps nevertheless tied the game with a groundout… Cervantez whiffed, and we were tied after eight innings. Derrick struck out Brown and Gallo, then even got Yocum to fly out in the ninth inning, the first time he was retired all day. Rodewald and Leo Jimenez then rapped doubles off Nava to complete the sweep. 4-3 Aces. Yocum 4-5, 3B, RBI; Hunt 7.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 0 ER, 2 BB, 3 K;

********.

In other news

May 27 – The Rebs shut down outfielder Juan Licona (.315, 3 HR, 25 RBI) for a month due to shoulder tendinitis.
May 27 – The Canadiens take 13 innings to beat the Falcons, 1-0. VAN INF Roberto Barraza (.298, 0 HR, 17 RBI) finds an RBI single in the top of the 13th to decide a game otherwise only exciting pitching enthusiasts.
May 28 – OCT SP Ken Nielsen (4-3, 3.27 ERA) pitches a complete-game 2-hitter, allowing only an unearned run in a 5-0 win against Indy.
May 30 – As the Stars beat the Miners, 1-0, the only run of the game scores on a wild pitch by PIT SP Aldomiro Campion (6-4, 3.18 ERA). The Brazilian right-hander pitches a complete-game 4-hitter for the loss.

Player of the Week (FL): WAS RF/2B/LF Tim Goss (.354, 5 HR, 28 RBI), batting .520 (13-25) with 4 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): OCT 1B Ian Stone (.316, 9 HR, 23 RBI), bashing .444 (12-27) with 3 HR, 7 RBI

FL Hitter of the Month: SAC 1B Justin Savalli (.268, 5 HR, 28 RBI), hitting .345 with 5 HR, 24 RBI
CL Hitter of the Month: LVA C/1B Chris Haynes (.344, 17 HR, 45 RBI), thrashing .333 with 12 HR, 26 RBI
FL Pitcher of the Month: PIT SP Brian Jones (8-1, 2.51 ERA), going 5-0 with a 2.47 ERA and 51 K
CL Pitcher of the Month: LVA CL Chris Derrick (6-1, 1.54 ERA, 13 SV), going 5-0 with a 1.54 ERA, 6 SV, and 5 K
FL Rookie of the Month: SAL OF Luis Carmona (.338, 1 HR, 9 RBI), all this month
CL Rookie of the Month: LVA 1B/OF Adam Jones (.294, 0 HR, 19 RBI), batting .347 with 12 RBI

Complaints and stuff

None of the top three teams in the North won on Saturday *or* Sunday, so the Coons held a share of first place to end the week despite getting swept in Vegas. The entire division was just 3 1/2 games apart at the start of June.

Adam Yocum also hit .444 (12-27) like Ian Stone this week, but didn’t have the homers or RBI’s to stink up to Ian Stone. Nine singles, a double, two triples, four stolen bases, and four RBI. He had a 10-game hitting streak, though, and in that streak was batting .467 (21-45) with five steals and six RBI.

Hunt’s appearance qualifies him for another one. There’s no shortage of people that should get pulled from the rotation, and surely more than we could even hope to offer replacements for, given that Val Centeno is getting incinerated in AAA.

We had really good pitching last year and couldn’t score, and now we’re just mediocre at everything. Awesome!

New 13-game homestand coming up after a day off on Monday. We’ll have the Condors, Elks, Indians (for four), and Stingers in Portland, and then it will be the draft already.

Fun Fact: Adam Yocum would be just fractions of a point of batting average behind Kris DiPrimio, if he qualified.

Missing 15 games early means that Yocum currently has only exactly 3 PA per team game played, when 3.1 are needed. Since he’s leading off every day now, it can’t be long before he gets back to that threshold, though.

[Eugene Church]

Congratulations, Westheim!

You recently passed the 1 million mark in views.

Long Live the Raccoons!

[Westheim]

Originally Posted by Eugene Church

Congratulations, Westheim!

You recently passed the 1 million mark in views.

Long Live the Raccoons!

Thanks Eugene! I only fear that I'm alone responsible for like 50k of those views

The Raccoons will continue as long as the game lets me, probably. What else would I do with my life without them?

+++

Raccoons (27-24) vs. Condors (22-28) – June 3-5, 2070

The Raccoons tried to get going again after getting swept in Las Vegas and would have the Condors in to start a new 13-game homestand. The Condors were 12 games out in the South with their bottom three offense and mediocre pitching, and a -24 run differential. We were up 2-1 against them this year. Outfielders Jeremy Jenkins and Jake Elliott and reliever Jason Reed sat on the Condors DL, and they were bottoms in stolen bases, barely out-stealing Adam Yocum as a team.

Projected matchups:
Tony Gaytan (5-3, 2.50 ERA) vs. Ryan Mann (5-4, 4.69 ERA)
Nick Walla (4-4, 5.68 ERA) vs. Bryan Farris (2-2, 3.61 ERA)
Vinny Morales (5-4, 3.99 ERA) vs. Luis Renteria (3-6, 5.20 ERA)

Farris was a southpaw, Joe Allen (1-4, 5.49 ERA) was a southpaw and could be skipped into the series, but we would not see Jason Brenize, ace of aces, who was somehow 3-4 with a 1.72 ERA while trying to win his ninth Pitcher of the Year.

With the way things were going, Harrison Hunt would stay in the rotation for at least one more start, and we’d piggy-back Walla and Ian Lowry, who were a combined 0-4 with a 10.80 ERA in their last six starts, on Tuesday, which was probably going to be a punt then.

Game 1
TIJ: 2B M. Roberts – SS M. Moreno – 1B D. Cline – LF Rugar – C Brann – CF Schreiber – 3B Vidrio – RF Srour – P Mann
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P Gaytan

Through five innings in the opener, more Raccoons reached on errors (two) than on base hits (a Katz single), and nobody came even close to touching third base, let alone home plate. On the bright paw, Gaytan was no-hitting the Condors through five, walking two and whiffing four, but was inefficient and needed 74 pitches to make it through five. Mike Roberts ended the no-hitter contemplations with a single to left in the sixth inning, which blew the lid off immediately, as Mario Moreno, Josh Rugar, and Mike Brann also hit singles in the inning and the latter two each drove in a run to put the Condors up 2-0. Chris Schreiber flew out to leave two on, and Gaytan got two more outs in the seventh for an Emilio Vidrio single, but then had to be bailed out by Edgar Gutierrez. When J.P. Gallo homered to right in the bottom 7th it was only the second Raccoons hit in the game and of course came with nobody on base. Another hit didn’t come together until Tyler Reed followed Mann after eight innings of 2-hit ball, and allowed a leadoff single to Tyler Wharton in the bottom of the ninth. A double switch had put the pitcher in the #5 hole, and van Otterdijk pinch-hit and grounded out, moving the tying run to second base. Corral and Gallo both fanned to end the game. 2-1 Condors.

Four losses in a row, all kinda stupid, and the Titans had started to in again and had taken sole possession of first place again on Monday already, when the Raccoons had been off. By now we were a game and a half out.

Adam Yocum went 0-for-4 with 2 K to end his hot streak.

Game 2
TIJ: 2B M. Roberts – SS M. Moreno – 1B D. Cline – LF Rugar – C Brann – 3B D. Rodriguez – CF Schreiber – RF J.D. Johnson – P Farris
POR: 2B Yocum – 1B Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – LF van Otterdijk – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P Walla

I braced with Honeypaws in one paw and a bottle of Capt’n Coma in the other when Nick Walla took the hill and gave up a run in the second inning when Mike Brann hit Danny Rodriguez hit a leadoff double to center and scored on Chris Schreiber’s groundout and J.D. Johnson’s sac fly to left. Farris allowed singles to Wharton and Corral in the bottom 2nd, and a fielding error by Johnson allowed them both into scoring position with one out, but pathetic groundouts by Gallo and Flowe kept them stranded, as usual; but when the Condors got Mike Roberts and Mario Moreno on base against Walla to begin the third inning and reached scoring position on David Cline’s groundout, Josh Rugar managed to hit another sac fly to Corral. Walla stranded the second runner, then singled to lead off the bottom half of the inning. Yocum walked, but was forced out on Fumero’s grounder to short. Katz grounded out to third, plating Walla, 2-1, Wharton walked, and van Otterdijk struck out…

While Walla’s pitching had turned turds this year, he tried to make up for it with another leadoff knock in the bottom 5th, hitting a Walla-banger (on the bounce, admittedly) for a leadoff double to right. The 1-2-3 batters then crapped out collectively to strand him in scoring position. Walla left trailing 2-1 after six busy innings and 99 pitches, with Rios putting away the left-handed bottom of the Condors lineup in the seventh. Farris allowed another leadoff hit in the seventh, when Flowe singled, and then Josh Mireles batted for Rios and doubled to right-center, putting another pair in scoring position for the somehow suddenly comatose top of the order. Yocum made another out in right, but at least his fly ball to Gavin Cook was deep enough to get Flowe home with the tying run, taking Walla off the hook. Fumero then popped out and Katzman whiffed in a spectacular display of repeated incompetence, but I remained composed and kept suckling on my bottle of booze without crying too loudly.

Roberts hit an infield single to begin the eighth but Danny Nava then struck out the next three batters, including a pinch-hitting Rich Monck, to keep that runner stranded. The tie was instead broken in the ninth against Pedro Valentin, who gave up a pinch-hit, 2-out solo homer to Vidrio. Tyler Reed was up against the bottom of the order, and Gallo grounded out. Morejon batted for Flowe and singled, advanced on a wild pitch, but Mireles then struck out. Yocum remained hitless in the series with a foul pop that Brann caught to end the inning… 3-2 Condors. T. Wharton 1-2, 2 BB; Corral 2-4; Morejon (PH) 1-1; Mireles (PH) 1-2, 2B; Walla 6.0 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 3 K and 2-2, 2B;

Arf.

Game 3
TIJ: CF Schreiber – 2B Monck – 1B D. Cline – LF Rugar – C Brann – 3B D. Rodriguez – SS Vidrio – RF Srour – P Joe Allen
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – 3B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF van Otterdijk – SS Mireles – C Brown – P Morales

Schreiber’s single and Rugar’s triple gave the Condors a 1-0 lead in the first before Brann whiffed to leave a runner on third, as apparently the Coons’ disease was spreading. Yocum singled (yay!) to begin the bottom 1st and Fumero doubled to put a pair in scoring position with nobody out, which meant I had to reach for the bottle again, but Katz flicked a 1-2 pitch very narrowly past Vidrio for an RBI single to tie the game. Joe Allen then struck out the 4-5-6 batters … but also balked in Fumero from third base to give the Coon a 2-1 lead. Morales hit a single in the second that led nowhere, then blew the lead by walking Schreiber, allowing a double to ex-Coon Rich Monck, and a sac fly to Cline in the third…

Both teams hit into a double play in the fourth, but Monck drove in the go-ahead run, 3-2, with a 2-out single in the fifth inning, plating Chris Srour, which left me sour, which coincidentally was also how Srour pronounced his oddball last name. Down 3-2, Sam Brown and Yocum went to the corners with singles and one out in the inning in the bottom 5th, and then Fumero hit into another double play… (double-facepaws noisily and repeatedly)

Morales held on for seven innings while getting no ******* support whatsoever. Mireles hit a leadoff single in the bottom 7th, but was also stranded as the Coons tried to get swept with nothing but 1-run games. McMahan and Ramirez struck out the 2-3-4 batters in the eighth, while the Coons’ 2-3-4 in the same inning made just three pathetic outs in the field. Ramirez got three more outs in a row in the ninth, and the Raccoons faced left-hander David Carlson in the bottom of the inning. Morejon flew out to center, but van Otterdijk singled to left, to tease us with the tying run on base before Mireles successfully crashed into a double play. 3-2 Condors. Yocum 2-4; Morejon 2-4;

Six in a row, five of them by one run, and we have scored a grand total of 1.8 runs per game in the last five.

AND HERE COME THE ELKS.

Pawsome!

Raccoons (27-27) vs. Canadiens (25-27) – June 6-8, 2070

Oh deer. They might only have the sixth-best offense and the second-worst pitching, with a bullpen made of dynamite, but what did that help you if you never got to that bullpen? We were about to blow a 4-2 lead in the season series. Only relievers on the DL for the Elks, who had scored 4.6 R/G in their last five, more than double the Coons’ output.

Projected matchups:
Jimmy Wharton (3-3, 3.97 ERA) vs. Dallas Samson (2-3, 2.82 ERA)
Harrison Hunt (0-0, 0.00 ERA) vs. Nate Freeman (2-5, 3.76 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (5-4, 2.51 ERA) vs. Juan Rosado (3-6, 4.65 ERA)

Only right-handers, as if it mattered.

Game 1
VAN: SS Barraza – LF J. Hawkins – RF Lozada – 1B An. Ramirez – CF D. Moore – 3B C. Castro – C J. Contreras – 2B Den. Wright – P Samson
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P J. Wharton

A rare sighting these days, the Raccoons took a 2-0 lead in the first inning by getting Yocum on base via balls, Katz with a single, they did a double steal, and then Big Wharton (groundout) and Morejon (single) each got a run home before the inning ended with Corral. Lil’ Wharton scattered a couple of hits and a walk the first time through and didn’t get K until he faced Roberto Barraza for the second time, but at least didn’t immediately fumble everything away again. Antonio Ramirez and Dan Moore hit a couple of long fly balls that were caught by Corral and Tyler Wharton, respectively, in the fourth; while in the fifth the Elks made two outs before getting singles from the 8-9 batters Dennis Wright and Samson, and then Wharton nicked Barraza to fill the bases for Jeff Hawkins, who grounded out sharply to Yocum to leave everybody stranded.

For Portland, Corral and Yocum hit into double play in the fourth and fifth, the latter doing so after a leadoff single by Jimmy Wharton (facepaws again). Katz then drew a leadoff walk in the sixth, stole second to get away from the 6-4-3, and while Big Wharton whiffed big, Morejon came through with an RBI single to right-center, extending the lead to 3-0. And then Corral hit into ANOTHER ******* DOUBLE PLAY.

Dennis Wright hit a 1-out single in the seventh, but the Elks didn’t bat for Samson, who struck out trying to bunt. That was Jimmy Wharton’s final batter, as Nava then came out for the top of the order and in a double switch that put Otal in the game, while Fumero moved to right to get rid of DP Corral’s face. He got Barraza out, and Gallo drew a leadoff walk in the bottom 7th. Flowe whiffed, and Otal reached on an error, while Yocum popped out for the second out. Fumero’s clean RBI single to left made it 4-0, Katz filled the bags with a walk, but Wharton flew out to center. Nava then allowed a single to Hawkins and a homer to Roberto Lozada in the eighth, cutting the lead in half again, before combining with Rios to finish the inning. The Coons went in order in the bottom 8th, but so did the Elks against Valentin and the losing streak was snapped. 4-2 Raccoons. Katzman 1-2, 2 BB; Morejon 2-4, 2 RBI; Gallo 1-2, BB; J. Wharton 6.2 IP, 5 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 4 K, W (4-3) and 1-2;

Game 2
VAN: SS Barraza – LF J. Hawkins – RF Lozada – 1B An. Ramirez – CF D. Moore – 3B C. Castro – C J. Contreras – 2B Den. Wright – P N. Freeman
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – 3B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF van Otterdijk – SS Mireles – C Flowe – P Hunt

The Raccoons opened the first with Yocum and Fumero singles before Katz fooled his way into a double play and Wharton flew out, and then Hunt, who had not allowed an earned run his first time out, got whacked around for four hits and two runs in the top 2nd. It could have been worse, given that Dan Moore opened the inning with a single and was caught stealing. Carlos Castro and Jonathan Contreras followed with more singles, Wright slapped a triple into the rightfield corner, and a K on Freeman and Barraza’s groundout at least kept his antlers on base.

The Elks slapped Hunt around pretty good for eight hits and a couple of long fly outs, and made two outs on the base paths to keep the damage as low as it was through five innings, while the Raccoons were sleepy, but finally got on the board in the bottom 5th with a solo homer by Jake Flowe. Hunt then singled, but was left on base when Yocum grounded out to short. Hunt pitched one more inning, giving up a double to Contreras, who was left on base, then was replaced by Lowry, who hadn’t pitched in over a week and gave up a seventh-inning run on Barraza and Lozada hits that extended the Elks lead to 3-1 again. He pitched the eighth as well, allowing a walk but no more runs. Gutierrez pitched the ninth, while Freeman held the Raccoons to five hits in eight innings of 1-run ball. Long-ago Raccoon Elijah LaBat then faced the 3-4-5 batters in the bottom of the ninth. Katz’ infield single and a full-count walk to Wharton put the tying runs on base with nobody out. Morejon ran another full count – and also walked, and now we were at three on, nobody out, and surely doomed. George van Otterdijk was up first, didn’t wait around, and cracked a liner to the left side on the first pitch from LaBat. Wharton took off from second as Barraza lunged, I squealed, but the Gold Glover missed it, and the ball got into leftfield and the tying runs both came in to score…!! …and then Mireles fanned, Flowe fanned, and Gallo batted for Gutierrez and grounded out. (hits head on door frame with vigor)

McMahan got around a leadoff single by Lozada by retiring the next three batters in the tenth inning, while Roberto Navarro, who had replaced LaBat after the game-tying single in the ninth, continued in the bottom 10th, now facing the top of the Coons’ choker lineup. Yocum walked, was caught stealing, and that was basically the inning. Victor Ramirez put Contreras and Marcos Onelas on base in the 11th, but bailed out when Barraza hit into an inning-ending double play. The Otter also hit into a double play to erase Wharton’s leadoff walk in that inning. No, it was the Elks that broke the tie when Antonio Ramirez hit a homer off Pedro Valentin in the 12th inning. Left-hander Josh Atkins would pitch his second inning in the bottom 12th, facing the anemic bottom of the order. Mireles and Flowe made outs before Corral pinch-hit and singled to flip the lineup over one more time. Yocum singled to right on the next pitch, and Corral dashed to third base. Fumero then hit a fly to shallow right, and Lozada came running and made a leaping catch to end the ******* ballgame. 4-3 Canadiens. Yocum 3-5, BB; Corral (PH) 1-1;

(silently facepaws)

Game 3
VAN: SS Barraza – CF D. Moore – RF Lozada – 1B An. Ramirez – 3B C. Castro – C J. Contreras – LF Jose Alvarez – 2B Den. Wright – P J. Rosado
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Brown – P Gaytan

Sunday’s clumsy attempts by the stillborn offense included Yocum running a 3-0 count to begin the bottom 1st before grounding to Dennis Wright, and then reaching when Wright dropped the grounder not once, but twice for a stupid error. The inning then dragged on, Wharton walked, but Morejon’s groundout left two on. The damn Elks then killed Tony Gaytan for seven runs in *22* pitches in the second inning as Castro singled, Contreras singled and Fumero overran the ball for an error, but it didn’t matter because Jose Alvarez walked anyway. Wright doubled in two, Rosado singled in two, Barraza singled, Moore actually made an out, and then Lozada rammed a 3-run homer. The game was over anyway, and so was Gaytan’s time in pants. Rios replaced him for garbage relief, while the Coons scored a run on straight 2-out singles by the 3-4-5 batters in the bottom 3rd, Corral drew a walk, but Gallo then made the last out to first base. Rios was going through the end of five innings, and in that frame Wharton got on and Morejon homered to reduce the score to 7-3 – not that I harbored any hopes.

Ramirez in the sixth and Nava in the seventh both gave up a couple of base hits, but no runs, while the Coons got a run in the bottom 7th when Rosado gave up a pair of doubles to Fumero and Katz to begin the inning – but Katz then also left the game with a back complaint and was replaced with Mireles. When Rosado walked Wharton, the tying run was in the box, but they were also set up perfectly for a double play, so why hope? Morejon’s solid RBI single to left plated the pinch-runner Mireles and knocked out Rosado for lefty Josh Atkins. Van Otterdijk batted for Corral, flicked a slap single over Wright on an 0-2 pitch to load them up… but with nobody out, so here were the doom bells tolling again. Gallo’s grounder to second was taken for an out there, but Gallo legged out the return throw and Wharton scored, 7-6. Unfortunately there was no right-handed bat left on the bench to hit for Sam Brown, but why would you hit for Sam Brown? The rookie rushed a single up the middle AND THE ******* GAME WAS TIED…!!! Jake Flowe then batted for Nava and of course found that precious double play to hit into, ending the inning.

A Yocum error put John Bustillos on base against McMahan to begin the top of the eighth, the outfielder having batted for Barraza for some odd reason. Moore hit into a fielder’s choice, Lozada legged out an infield single, but Moore then was caught trying to steal third base by Brown, and McMahan rung up the pinch-hitter Jeff Hawkins to escape the inning. When Yocum led off the bottom 8th with a single against Atkins, he this time stole second successfully and reached third on Fumero’s scratch single. Mireles’ single to left broke the tie, 8-7, and Mireles was then thrown out on a double steal attempt, but Fumero was at third base now. The Elks declined to pitch to Wharton and instead gave up the Fumero run on a Morejon single before right-hander Roberto Navarro replaced Atkins. Van Otterdijk and Gallo made easy outs, and the 2-run lead went to … well, Edgar Gutierrez. Valentin had been out two days in a row, not with overwhelming success, and Gutierrez was the fresher option… also the only other option. Castro grounded out to Morejon and Contreras whiffed, but Alvarez then hit a double to center. Hector Moreno pinch-hit in the #8 spot and walked, and Onelas batted for the pitcher and on a 1-2 pitch drove in the tying runs… (faints) Bustillos walked, Moore hit a bloop single, and Lozada grounded out to short with the bases loaded to end the inning.

Bottom 9th. When Brown drew a walk off southpaw Paul Wolk, Gutierrez was retained to bunt, but knocked the ball into a force at second base, because nobody on this ******* team could do ******* basic baseball anymore. Yocum hit an infield single, but Fumero’s grounder to short ended up forcing out Yocum, while Gutierrez wobbled to third base with the winning run. Mireles walked in a full count, and now there was NO place to put Tyler Wharton. Bases loaded, two outs, tied ******* ballgame. Pitch to him! Pitching to him they did, and he flew out to Bustillos in right. *********.

Extras posed an issue for the Coons, who had already gotten 23 outs from their pen, and that’s without considering the previous day’s game. Nick Walla went to the bullpen at this point, while Gutierrez was cluelessly sent back out there despite tossing 33 times in the ninth inning of despair. Contreras hit a 2-out solo homer off him, and so that was how we were gonna lose that one, huh? LaBat came back out for the bottom 10th, which was led off by Morejon, who raked a long drive to right-center – AND IT WAS OUTTA HERE!! Tied game AGAIN!! Madhouse! Gallo hit a single after that, but never got off first base. Valentin then was sent out for the 11th on his third straight day, and if we were somehow still standing after that it would be Walla pitching in relief for the second time in his career. The Elks made three quick outs against Valentin, but the Coons went down just as quickly against LaBat, and that would be all we’d dare ask of our closer.

Walla it was, and it could hardly have gone worse. He nailed Dan Moore with his first pitch. Moore went to third on a Lozada single and scored on Hawkins’ groundout. Castro raked an RBI triple and scored on a groundout when Walla couldn’t remove even LABAT with two strikes on him, so the Elks zoomed out to a 3-run lead. Somehow the Elks managed to **** the tying run into the box in the bottom 11th after Wharton popped out when Brian Brillhart walked Morejon and nailed van Otterdijk. Gallo struck out, but Brown lobbed an RBI single. But next was Walla with two outs and no reserves of any kind. He grounded to Moreno at second… who flubbed the grounder for an error. Yocum appeared once more with the bases loaded, but grounded out to Castro. 13-11 Canadiens. Katzman 2-4, 2B, RBI; Mireles 1-2, BB, RBI; T. Wharton 2-4, 3 BB, 2B; Morejon 5-6, BB, 2 HR, 6 RBI; Brown 3-6, 2 RBI; Rios 3.2 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

It’s not enough, Jerry. You have to do MORE.

In other news

June 2 – Aces outfielder Jorge Caceres (.240, 5 HR, 21 RBI) will miss the rest of the season with a torn labrum.
June 3 – CHA OF Matt Bakker (.189, 3 HR, 9 RBI) hits two home runs and drives in six runs on a 3-hit day as the Falcons out-slug the Loggers for a 16-9 win.
June 3 – The Capitals and Gold Sox both score in the 11th and 12th innings before the Caps out-last the Sox for a 5-4, 13-inning win.
June 6 – Sacramento acquires catcher Francisco Roviva (.159, 1 HR, 8 RBI) from the Blue Sox in exchange for 1B Orlando Reyes (.426, 1 HR, 13 RBI).

Player of the Week (FL): CIN OF Melvin Avila (.326, 4 HR, 30 RBI), hitting .455 (10-22) with 2 HR, 9 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): CHA LF/RF Tony Lopez (.327, 5 HR, 21 RB), going .600 (12-20) with 2 HR, 7 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Buenos tardes! This is Luis Silva, and I have just given the GM something for his nausea and put him to sleep in my room. I guess it was all a bit much on the old bones and nerves especially.

I can assure you that nothing is majorly wrong with El Gato, who left Sunday’s game with a pinch in his back. He might sit out on Monday, but I think he’ll be good to go after that. He should do more gymnastics and eat his greenies. They all should, really. (looks at Morejon munching down on a bucket of chicken drums, disgusted)

I have not only good news from the trainer’s room, though, since last year’s #43 pick SP Mike Pavan started the season with a 5.50 ERA in Ham Lake and has been shut down this year due to a nasty case of shoulder inflammation. He’s not expected to pitch again this year. Also, Val Centeno left his last start in AAA with an abdominal issue, and we’re looking at what is wrong with the rest of his body given his 7.52 ERA in St. Petersburg. I think that is all I am qualified to talk about and I’ll leave you baseball people to your baseball things now.

Fun Fact: Fun is dead.

[Westheim]

The Raccoons were in trouble, not only because of all the losing, but because despite seven potential starting pitchers on the roster, they had NOBODY to start the upcoming Monday opener against the Indians after burning Ian Lowry in a dumb extra-inning game loss on Saturday, and burning EVERYBODY including Nick Walla, Monday’s scheduled starter, in an even dumber extra-inning loss on Sunday, in which the pen plus Walla abortively pitched 9.2 innings after Tony Gaytan was gangbanged out of the game in the second inning.

Walla wasn’t available, Lowry wasn’t available, Rios had been burned in (score- and pointless) long relief on Sunday, and Vinny Morales was exactly the wrong guy to start on short rest. Danny Nava would be some sort of last-resort option given his four pitches, but little stamina (five inning *at most*), but he had also pitched on Sunday. EVERYBODY had pitched on Sunday, and their mothers, too!

Hence, roster moves. Harrison Hunt (0-0, 1.38 ERA) and Edgar Gutierrez (0-0, 3.04 ERA) were optioned to AAA through no fault of their own – but we needed arms. Jacob Davis (.148, 0 HR, 3 RBI) was also sent away DESPITE Katzman dealing with the back issue and sitting out Monday’s game. But we needed arms and with the pitcher we were calling up we were punting Monday’s game anyway: Victor Chavez was plucked from his scheduled start in AAA to make a spot start for the Raccoons on Monday (and then would be sent back immediately afterwards). He had a 5.92 ERA in five starts in the majors. Bless his little 27-year-old heart. Needing a long man more than anything else, the Coons turned to Matt Schmieder as the second call-up. The 28-year-old had a 5.31 ERA in 72 games in the majors. The last addition was a spare lefty, Antonio Pacheco, who had a 7.02 ERA in St. Pete this year after solid performances for the Coons late last year.

Walla would likely start the last game of the Indians series after Morales and Jimmyboy on regular rest.

Raccoons (28-29) vs. Indians (26-30) – June 9-12, 2070

The Indians sat in fifth place in the tight CL North, 4 1/2 games behind first, and brought the #9 offense and #7 pitching and a -25 run differential. The Raccoons had lost eight of their last nine (seven by one or two runs) and looked ideal for starting a rally out of the doldrums for last year’s pennant winners. They had the worst defense and lowest OBP among all CL teams, though, so those were reasons for concern. They also had Justin Esch and Wally Leggett on the DL.

Projected matchups:
Victor Chavez (0-0) vs. Jorge Flores (5-5, 3.99 ERA)
Vinny Morales (5-5, 3.97 ERA) vs. Girolamo Pizzichini (4-4, 3.97 ERA)
Jimmy Wharton (4-3, 3.61 ERA) vs. Miguel Lopez (2-5, 2.21 ERA)
Nick Walla (4-5, 5.77 ERA) vs. Mike DeWitt (6-4, 3.17 ERA)

DeWitt was the only left-hander in the rotation.

As indicated, Katzman got the day off after leaving Sunday’s game with a tweak in his back, but he was available on the short bench.

Game 1
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – C A. Gomez – 1B M. Rogers – 3B Ma. Martin – RF T. Torres – SS Valadez – 2B G. Lujan – P J. Flores
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – SS Mireles – C Flowe – P Chavez

Former Critters speedster Malcolm Spicer singled and stole second in the first inning, but it didn’t matter since Chavez was taken deep by Alex Gomez anyway. The stunner about the first inning was that the Raccoons drew even without making an out as Yocum singled, Fumero doubled him home, and then scored on a Morejon single before Wharton hit into a double play and killed the inning. Not to worry about the Indians’ free wins here, though; Chavez kept melting merrily, allowed leadoff hits to Jose Hilario and Spicer in the third inning, walked Gomez, and fell behind 3-2 on Matt Rogers’ groundout. Matt Martin even struck out, but a walk to Tony Torres filled the bases again, and Fernando Valadez strung a double past Jose Corral for two more runs and a 5-2 score. The Coons would get leadoff singles from their 3-4 batters in the bottom 4th, but Corral now crashed into a double play, and Gallo was mostly useless anyway and grounded out to Guillermo Lujan.

Defense dragged Chavez through the fifth inning before Antonio Pacheco gave up a run on two more hits in the sixth, and then put Martin and Valadez on the corners with hits in the seventh and gave up another one of those 2-out, 2-run doubles to Lujan, who also hit another 2-out RBI double off Matt Schmieder in the ninth inning as the Raccoons’ makeshift pitching alignment for Monday never stopped melting. Jerry Morejon hit one of those meaningless solo homers in the ninth inning, but apart from that the Portland Alley Cats were simply slaughtered. 10-3 Indians. Morejon 3-4, HR, 2 RBI;

Not even mad about this final score. We lost *this* game on the previous weekend.

Chavez (0-1, 9.00 ERA) and Schmieder (0-0, 9.00 ERA) were deleted on the spot, while Pacheco would hang around for a few more days. The next “technically warm body” pitcher up was 33-year-old Juan Soriano, who somehow wasn’t ever gonna go away, and the roster was filled by Jesus Guerrero, who had hit .091 in his first four games in the majors.

Game 2
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – C A. Gomez – 1B M. Rogers – 3B Ma. Martin – RF T. Torres – SS Valadez – 2B G. Lujan – P Pizzichini
POR: 2B Yocum – 3B Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – LF van Otterdijk – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Morales

The Raccoons ended up with the bases loaded in the second inning through no doing of their own. Morejon drew a leadoff walk before the Indians infield butchered grounders by both Corral and Morales to present Yocum with a full set of doubly unearned runners and two outs. He lined out to Lujan, of course. Vinny Morales was perfect the first time through, whiffing three, but in turn allowed three singles in the fourth inning, including leadoff knocks by Hilario and Spicer. Gomez’ sac fly put Indy up 1-0, Spicer was caught stealing by Flowe, Rogers hit another single, but Matt Martin popped out to Fumero. An inning later, Lujan raked his third RBI double in the series, driving in Tony Torres, who had already doubled to begin the inning. Hilario strung an RBI triple to get to 3-0, but Spicer flew out to Wharton to leave him on base. The Raccoons had two hits and no runs through five innings, as usual.

The hole only got deeper and blacker; Morales conceded a leadoff single to Torres in the seventh before Valadez tripled and scored on a Morejon error when Lujan honestly tried to ground out to first base for a change. Pizza surrendered himself, which was the end of Vinny Morales’ forsaken attempt to stop the profuse bleeding. Soriano replaced him, got an out from Hilario, and then conceded Morales’ run with two 2-out singles, walked Rogers, and then nailed Martin with an 0-2 pitch to force in another run. McMahan got Torres to fly out to center to leave three on, as if anything mattered anymore.

The Raccoons didn’t reach the board until after the stretch when Josh Mireles cracked a pinch-hit homer (with nobody on base of course) against Pizza to shorten the score to 7-1. Yocum and Fumero then singled to force Pizza from the game, but Katzman lined out to short against reliever Rodolfo Zea and the runners remained on the corners. Another run scored when Guerrero drew a 2-out walk from Tim Tennant in van Otterdijk’s spot in the eighth inning and then got around to score on consecutive singles by the 7-8 batters. Tennant nailed Gallo attempting to make the final out as pinch-hitter, filling the bases instead, but for the second time in this series Yocum rolled over, this time to third base and on the first pitch. Those were the last runners wasted by Portland in this game. 7-2 Indians. Yocum 2-5, 2B; Mireles (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI;

(looks helplessly out of his big black googly eyes)

Game 3
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – 1B M. Rogers – 3B Ma. Martin – RF T. Torres – SS Valadez – C M. Reed – 2B R. Cabrera – P Mi. Lopez
POR: 2B Yocum – 3B Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – LF Guerrero – C Brown – P J. Wharton

For the second time in a week a Raccoons starter got taken for seven runs in a rather early inning, as Jimmy Wharton just sucked, had nothing, and the defense didn’t help either. Matt Martin and Tony Torres hit a pair of singles and Valadez struck out, but from there it was carnage in the second inning as Mark Reed doubled in two runs, Rich Cabrera singled, Lopez bunted, Hilario walked, Spicer singled in a pair and Matt Rogers raked a 3-piece. Sending him back out against the left-handed bottom of the order in the third inning yielded a 3-run homer for Rich Cabrera, and a dismissal after a 10-run flogging. All runs were earned although the brown-hatted dimwits somehow also managed to fit in three errors in the first five innings.

When the Raccoons somehow scored a run on Morejon plating Katzman with a grounder in the fourth, and Katzman hit a 2-run homer with two outs in the fifth, at no time did I take it as an interruption of their sucking, because Ian Lowry was pitching garbage relief at the same time, and was truly garbage, allowing another four runs in 2.2 innings before being beaten off the mound. Rios allowed a run in the seventh, after which Otal batted for him, got nicked by Lopez, and Yocum and Katz hits got Otal around to score, at which point we only trailed by a dandy 11 runs. Soriano and Valentin got to finish this burning trash can of a game. 15-4 Indians. Mireles (PH) 1-1; Katzman 4-5, HR, 3 RBI;

Maud. Sometimes… sometimes I wish I could just … fly away.

Juan Soriano, who didn’t allow a run, but walked three batters in just two brief appearances, was on waivers to get up the next bozo with a scouting report: Matt Burgan, a 26-year-old former third-rounder that had no qualifications to get to the majors, but was at least well rested.

Game 4
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – C A. Gomez – 1B M. Rogers – 3B Ma. Martin – RF T. Torres – SS Valadez – 2B G. Lujan – P M. DeWitt
POR: 2B Yocum – 1B Fumero – 3B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – SS Mireles – C Flowe – LF Guerrero – P Walla

The Raccoons took a 2-0 LEAD on Jake Flowe’s second-inning homer with Mireles on base, which sounded like a dream, as did Walla’s three no-hit innings to begin the Thursday series finale. Not that things were good; he walked two and struck out one, and gave the outfielders a bit of a hustle, too. A 5-run fifth was not out of the question. The Indians haggled us down to a 3-run fourth on a Torres homer after a stupid leadoff walk to Alex Gomez and an infield single by Rogers, because why not put them on base like that…?

The Coons in the bottom 4th got even on Wharton and Mireles doubles to left, and Flowe gave the team the lead for the second time on the day with a 1-out RBI single to left-center, 4-3. Guerrero then hit into a fielder’s choice, and was also caught stealing. When DeWitt was hit for in the fifth, Walla was at least still pitching. In a 1-11 run with THAT rotation, that almost counted as a moral win. If anything, Walla got WORSE as the game went along, eventually issuing SIX walks to the Indians in 6.2 innings. He left with Hilario (walk) on second, Spicer (infield single) on first, and two outs in the seventh, and Nava blew the skinny 4-3 lead when he allowed an RBI single to Alex Gomez, who was hitting all of .186. BRILLIANT.

Rogers’ groundout ended the inning and then Flowe was involved in the go-ahead run for the third time in the game, scoring on Corral’s 2-out double to right to break the 4-all tie. Nava got Martin out in the eighth, then was replaced with Pacheco, who **** the 6-7 batters on base (left-handers by the way) with a walk and a single, then threw a wild pitch before PH Matt McInnis popped out on the infield for two gone. The Coons went to Victor Ramirez when Rich Cabrera pinch-hit and got another pop to end the inning. Katzman hit a leadoff single in the bottom of the eighth, only to be left on first base, and Ramirez then remained in the game to try and get three more outs from the top of the order. He got two, allowed another single to Gomez, who was ONLY hitting against the Coons, and then Rogers grounded out to third. 5-4 Coons. Yocum 1-2, 2 BB; Mireles 2-4, 2B, RBI; Flowe 3-3, HR, 3 RBI; Corral 1-1, 2B, RBI;

Raccoons (29-32) vs. Scorpions (27-34) – June 13-15, 2070

While I was begging the baseball gods for the sweet kiss of death, the Stingers visited to complete this beyond-rancid homestand. They had the fourth-most runs in the FL (great), and gave up the third-most (as if), and had a -12 run differential, while the flogged Coons were down to -24 after THAT Indians series. Sacramento was without starter Justin Kent and outfielder Alex Barnes, they had the *worst* FL rotation (as if!), but the third-most homers (oh god). The Raccoons had lost the last two meetings with the Scorpions, a sweep in 2066 and two-outta-three in 2069.

Projected matchups:
Tony Gaytan (5-4, 3.23 ERA) vs. Marco Clemente (5-6, 5.93 ERA)
Gabriel Rios (2-0, 2.10 ERA) vs. Bobby O‘Connor (3-5, 4.58 ERA)
Vinny Morales (5-6, 4.25 ERA) vs. Alfred Ditmars (1-6, 5.08 ERA)

Southpaw Sunday – but I’d be outta town for the draft in New York. Bother!

Game 1
SAC: 2B J. Schmidt – 3B A. Rodriguez – 1B Savalli – CF Pinault – C Roviva – SS Hills – LF Wang – RF A. Warner – P M. Clemente
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – RF Corral – LF van Otterdijk – C Flowe – 3B Gallo – P Gaytan

Gaytan allowed two hits in the first inning, and two hits and a run in the second inning when former Elks stinkturd Aaron Warner singled home Francisco Roviva and his leadoff double, and I was depressed on the trusty brown couch. The Raccoons barely had two hits in FIVE innings, but Gaytan at least got better as the game went along and started to get some strikeouts. He grounded out to begin the bottom 6th but after that Yocum and Katzman both singled and pulled off a double steal. Morejon tied the game with a sac fly, Wharton drove a go-ahead RBI double into the gap, and a soft single by Corral put them on the corners for van Otterdijk, who lobbed another single over the head of ex-Coon Brian Hills to make it 3-1. Jake Flowe hit another RBI single, but Gallo popped out to end the inning. Gaytan pitched another inning to reach the stretch, then was hit for with Mireles, who after the team went 1-2-3 against a chewy Clemente remained in the game to give Katzman a couple innings off. McMahan struck out the 9-1-2 batters in order in the eighth, setting up Valentin, who began the ninth inning by running four 3-ball counts. He walked the leadoff man Justin Savalli, allowed a single to Mike Pinault, the team leader with 12 homers, gave up a run on Steve Giles’ sac fly, and then walked Hills. Then he was yanked. Nava came in, got a double-play grounder from Dao-zi Wang, and that ended the charade. 4-2 Coons. Gaytan 7.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 6 K, W (6-4);

Nobody on the team had more than one hit, one RBI, or one run scored.

Game 2
SAC: 2B J. Schmidt – 3B A. Rodriguez – CF Wang – RF Pinault – 1B Savalli – LF S. Giles – C Preston – SS Hills – P O’Connor
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – RF Fumero – LF Otal – 3B Gallo – C Brown – P Rios

The annual attempt at having Rios join the rotation brought out a Stingers lineup with four right-handers atop the order and four left-handers behind them, when I always tried to stir the different bits in the salad a bit, but what the **** do I know? Look at that roster.

Both teams had only one base hit the first time through and neither side reached third base, while Rios then brittled in the fourth inning and allowed a walk to Alex Rodriguez, allowed a single to Savalli, and then nicked Giles to load the bases with two outs. Steve Preston hit a ball to deep center, but not deep enough to beat Wharton and the inning ended. Wang and Pinault both reached in the sixth inning, but Wang was caught stealing third base, and Rios wiggled out that way. Rios was not exactly overwhelming, but pitched seven shutout innings with three walks and four strikeouts. This effort would not be merited with a W or something, because the Raccoons were just as bad and had just three scattered hits between them through seven.

The second Rios left the game everything then fell apart as neither Victor Ramirez nor Antonio Pacheco could get any ******* batter out in the eighth inning. The two tallied five base hits, a wild pitch, and a hit batter between them and Ramirez was charged with three runs. When Gallo and Brown then accidentally reached base to begin the bottom 8th, van Otterdijk fell face-first into a double play and Yocum floated one out to Pinault to leave a runner on third base. Matt Burgan made his ABL debut in the ninth inning, allowed two hits, a walk, walked in a run against Wang with one out, Pinault hit a sac fly, and I just wanted to escape through the sewers. 5-0 Scorpions. Morejon 2-4; Rios 7.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 3 BB, 4 K;

(calmly takes his mantle and puts his hat on, and leaves the office without saying a word to anybody)

Game 3
SAC: 2B J. Schmidt – 3B A. Rodriguez – 1B Savalli – LF S. Giles – SS Hills – CF Wang – C Preston – RF A. Warner – P Ditmars
POR: 2B Fumero – 3B Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – SS Mireles – C Flowe – LF Guerrero – P Morales

Morales struck out two and allowed nobody on base the first time through, but also ran three full counts, so the pitch count was not exactly low. The Raccoons had a single from van Otterdijk, who was then doubled off by Mireles, and apart from that also amounted to no offense the first time through, though. Savalli flew out to van Otterdijk at the fence in the fourth, but made the 12th straight out against Morales. Vinny got to 13 straight retirements before Hills singled to right, but was then doubled off by Wang’s grounder to short and a 6-4-3 double play. Warner singled with one out in the sixth and Katzman then threw Ditmars’ bunt away, putting a pair in scoring position. Morales found something, struck out John Schmidt, and Alex Rodriguez grounded out, keeping the game scoreless in the middle of the sixth.

The Coons loaded the bases in the bottom 6th with a 1-out single by Fumero and walks issued to Katz and Wharton. A calm grounder from van Otterdijk to Hills however prevented any runs from being scored… and Morales walked Savalli to begin the seventh, and Giles’ single sent the first baseman to third base. Again Morales cleaned up his own mess, struck out Hills, and got another double play grounder from Wang, but his pitch count was up to 95 and he was pretty much done then. Gallo batted for him with Flowe on first and two outs in the bottom 7th and drew the fifth walk that Ditmars offered in the game, turning the lineup over to Fumero, who in turn continued the great tradition of feeding one to Hills to end another ******* inning.

For the second day in a row thus, the Coons’ starter went seven, allowed no runs, and left with a no-decision. ********. For the second day in a row then, the Coons’ pen immediately blew the game. McMahan allowed a single to Tony Rivera, and Valentin replaced him with two outs, but gave up the game-winning single to Schmidt. 1-0 Scorpions. Morales 7.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 6 K;

In other news

June 10 – Radial nerve compression ends the season of Knights SP Adam Lunn (5-3, 2.69 ERA).
June 12 – PIT SP Steven Fenstermacher (4-7, 4.76 ERA) throws a 3-hit shutout against the Buffaloes, striking out seven batters for the 8-0 win.
June 14 – Rebs LF/CF/2B Darby Laybolt (.321, 4 HR, 19 RBI) collects five hits, including a homer and triple (but no double) and drives in four runs against the Knights by the time Richmond wins 7-5 in the 15th inning.
June 14 – IND CF/LF/3B/1B Matt Martin (.292, 3 HR, 21 RBI) has suffered a strained hamstring and will miss a month’s worth of games.

Player of the Week (FL): PIT 3B/RF Eric Frasher (.281, 5 HR, 19 RBI), hitting .393 (11-28) with 3 HR, 8 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): MIL C Manuel Rodriguez (.309, 10 HR, 46 RBI), slapping .579 (11-19) with 2 HR, 6 RBI

Complaints and stuff

J.P. Gallo wondered out loud this week about signing a new contract. I told him bluntly that the best thing about this ******* roster was that his ******* contract was expiring at the end of the year.

I don’t think he’ll talk to me again. Now I just gotta get rid of the rest of them.

Fun Fact: From June 8 to June 12, Raccoons starters put up a 12.88 ERA.

But hold on, it gets better. That’s only the starters that STARTED a game. If you include the spectacularly useless relief outings of Nick Walla and Ian Lowry, then that value goes UP to a rousing 13.50 ERA……..

I wonder what they’re rousing, the rabble…

[Westheim]

2070 AMATEUR DRAFT

I still wasn’t done fawning over the pitching-rich draft pool when I arrived in New York on Sunday morning. Oscar Semchez did his best to dampen my expectations about drafting an entire rotation of All Stars, but I don’t think he was that successful with that.

So Sunday morning was spent trying to convince the other GM’s that out of the goodness of their own heart and as an act of charity – the Raccoons clearly needed the help – they should leave all of our hot list to us, but I don’t think they were that convinced to let us have more than one or two from that list, and two only if we were lucky (we were guaranteed one with the #13 pick). So there again was the annual hotlist (*high school players):

SP Nick Dry (14/13/13) – BNN #4
SP Jamie Dutton (13/14/11) – BNN #10
SP Ryan Neville (12/15/10) * – BNN #7
SP Eric Feeback (11/15/15) *
SP Dan Miceli (11/13/12)
SP Jalen McCorkle (13/12/13)
SP Ruben Cabrera (12/13/11) – BNN #9
SP Cameron Cofield (12/13/14) – BNN #3

CL David Griffin (17/13/9)
CL Dan McPartland (17/14/8) *

C/1B Marty Weaver (11/12/7) * – BNN #5

INF Chris Sandidge (13/12/13) * – BNN #6
3B/LF/1B Jason Hill (10/10/12)
1B Matt King (13/2/11) *

OF Brian Johnson (11/10/11)
OF Danny Stokes (12/9/14) *

As a reminder, the Raccoons came with their own #13 pick in the first round, two supplemental round picks, and two second-round picks, including the worst compensation pick of the year for the loss of Joel Starr.

The Buffaloes had the first pick in the draft and went for a starting pitcher… that wasn’t even on the hotlist. Andy Knight was the #1 pick of the year, and as I told you, there had been half a dozen more pitching guys that would have made the hotlist in a less-loaded year for arms, so this wasn’t even a huge upset. Teams then went where it hurt, and L.A. drafted Jamie Dutton at #2 and Denver took Nick Dry at #3. Sacramento followed with outfielder Billy Reading and the Rebs with SP Ken Pesola, also not on the hotlist for the same reasons as Knight, to complete the top 5. The Bayhawks then took Chris Sandidge at #6, the Condors followed that with Marty Weaver, but the top 10 were then completed with non-hotlist players, and only one of them was even a pitcher.

The Knights took away Romanian-American Dan Miceli at #11 – he had been the guy we were probably expecting to land at our top pick – but the remainder of the hotlist remained available. The only hotlist position player that might have tempted me over a pitcher with the #13 pick had been Sandidge, but he was gone. The five remaining starting pitchers on the list (Neville, Feeback, McCorkle, Cabrera, Cofield) were all right-handed, so there was nothing to differentiate them there. Cofield had the least diverse arsenal among them with two-and-a-half pitches, so we passed on him and had to pick one of the other four, and it was a *really* hard pick, because OSA was no real help in getting a second opinion either. They were also delighted about all of them. It was a REALLY tough choice in the end between the boy scout Neville and the unanimous (between OSA and Semchez) best stuff option in McCorkle, and we ended up choosing violence with the latter.

Right away, the Rebs then jumped on Cofield at #14, and the Titans took Cabrera with the #15 pick, and outfielder Danny Stokes went to Salem with the next pick after that. The Rebs had ANOTHER pick at #17 and chose closer David Griffin, and the Blue Sox got Neville at #18. The Titans got another one at #21, taking infielder Jason Hill, the Indians got Feeback at #23, and Cincy snatched outfielder Brian Johnson to end the first round proper. After a promising start, only 1B Matt King and the infielder/closer Dan McPartland remained on the hotlist.

Both of them remained and we were tempted to roll the dice on McPartland with their first supplemental-round pick, but Semchez advised that few teams were considering him a pitcher and he was probably safe to let him slide a few more spots and grab one of the remaining not-quite-hotlist starters while they were still around, so that’s how we ended up with the rarest of treasures – a pitcher from Rhode Island, Billy Ruben. McPartland indeed hung around for our second pick in the consolation round, so he was taken there. We then found still another pitcher to draft over Matt King, who, remember, didn’t have much power at all while wanting to play first base, so there was that. King was then finally *it* at #70, the Joel Starr pick, at which point you were asking yourself why he was still around, but he was our first actual position player pick of the draft.

Despite the wealth of pitchers that we shortlist, they were gone from the shortlist before the ninth round was over, with the exception of another one of those “infielder but what if?” candidates that we didn’t end up drafting.

+++

2070 PORTLAND RACCOONS DRAFT CLASS

Round 1 (#13) – SP Jalen McCorkle, 20, from Pasadena, TX – right-hander throws 96 with a great splitter and promising slider, plus a curve as fourth option. No obvious weaknesses in the command or fireworks departments, and we have it on good authority that he’s never failed to complete a homework assignment in 14 years of schooling.
Supp. Round (#32) – SP Billy Ruben, 18, from North Kingstown, RI – unassuming looking right-hander with a nifty changeup and forkball; definitely more of a corner nibbler, but he was getting groundballs galore with it.
Supp. Round (#44) – CL (INF) Dan McPartland, 18, from Southlake, TX – unimpressive infielder, but we’re convinced we can turn him into a great right-handed reliever with a 93mph heater and a wicked curveball.
Round 2 (#61) – SP Steve Lawson, 20, from Baltimore, MD – left-hander with three-and-a-half pitches, some of which were a bit too much on the plate, but he really had a knack for picking corners and getting grounders.
Round 2 (#70) – 1B Matt King, 18, from Mission, TX – odd skill set for a first baseman, as he is more of a contact and on-base kind of guy, with little in terms of power; some speed, but not enough to make a living from it.
Round 3 (#85) – 1B/C Bobby Walker, 19, from Raleigh, NC – can play both behind the dish and at first, and brings quite a bit of home run power, at the cost of prolific strikeout totals.
Round 4 (#109) – SP Jesse Ruggles, 18, from Rochester, MI – short and lean and thus lacking oomph on the frame, but he has a devious curveball; unsure how far he can make it with only that arsenal, but he’s a left-hander, and there’s always jobs for left-handers.
Round 5 (#133) – RF/LF David Wier, 19, from Forestville, OH – corner outfielder with limited range and speed, but some power potential; OSA hates him, which is why we didn’t pick him higher up.
Round 6 (#157) – SS/2B Joe Caldwell, 21, from New Bedford, MA – blueprint of the light-hitting shortstop, but there was Gold Glove potential and a stolen base title in the cards if he could ever figure out how to get on base
Round 7 (#181) – SP Dave Nunez, 18, from San Juan, Puerto Rico – right-hander with a good slider and 87mph lukewarm fastball; no real third pitch to talk about.
Round 8 (#205) – SS Skylar DiMaio, 18, from New York, NY – another slick-fielding, singles-poking, no-power shortstop, but this one didn’t really have the legs for stealing bases; switch-hitter, though.
Round 9 (#229) – CL Scott Stepp, 20, from Pensacola, FL – right-hander with a good slider, but some interesting control issues
Round 10 (#253) – INF Wayne Cartwright, 18, from Pleasant Grove, UT – another glove-first infielder with a thundering throwing arm and at least a good amount of speed to try and make up for offensive shortcomings
Round 11 (#277) – SP Logan Kerschen, 18, from Angola, IN – default left-hander selected in the 11th round, as was good customs around here; the kid had two-and-a-half pitches and nothing that really made him stand out, even the fireworks off his 86mph “fastball” being kinda lame
Round 12 (#301) – RF/LF Phil Christensen, 18, from Candler-McAfee, GA – sluggish corner outfielder, which shouldn’t be confused with “slugging”, who dropped pretty far in the draft for having a good eye and at least some power
Round 13 (#325) – C Michael Kasper, 21, from the Bronx, NY – last guy on the shortlist, which … is that something?

All picks were assigned to Aumsville.

+++

Of course removals were inevitable, and here will be a few of the young players that had to leave the organization after this draft haul:

For pitchers, while AAA was littered with failures, none of them had to go right now (partly because we didn’t want to deplete the scraps we had left for a budget with dismissals of guys drawing a minimum contract right now…), and instead the lower minors were purged of pitchers John Knox (2068, 3rd round), who was a peculiarly quick release for somebody drafted so high up, but he had just turned 25 and he had ZERO clue where his pitches were going at this stage; also Steve Leopold (2065, 4th round), Chad Rayman (2067, 7th round and another position player conversion), Tom Roane (2064, 11th round), Russell Dares (2069, 13th round), and a few more that walked in through scouting invitations or were signed in the dark winter off other teams’ discards.

On the position player side we parted with 1B Jeff Hensley (2065, 2nd round), who had reached AAA, but had zero success there, LF/1B Zach Clemens (2066, 10th round), INF Scott Duck (2067, 10th round), 2B/SS Jamie Schwartz (2069, 12th round), INF Alex Mercedes (2066 IFA, $44k), LF/RF Josh Koths (2066, 13th round), and the odd other walk-on.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (30-34) @ Buffaloes (28-35) – June 17-19, 2070

I reluctantly met the Failcoons again in Topeka for a 3-game set starting on Tuesday, the first of nine straight games ahead of the final off day before the All Star Game. The Buffos were also in fifth place, ten games out in the FL East and ranked second from the bottom in runs scored in the FL (we were getting back there, by the way), while allowing the fifth-fewest runs. They had the worst OBP and batting average, but the best bullpen in the FL. When these teams had last met in 2066, the Buffos had won two of three games.

Projected matchups:
Jimmy Wharton (4-4, 4.70 ERA) vs. Angel Suarez (6-3, 3.23 ERA)
Nick Walla (4-5, 5.73 ERA) vs. T.J. Herbert (2-1, 1.66 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (6-4, 3.08 ERA) vs. Eric Langan (4-8, 4.71 ERA)

Only right-handed pitchers here.

Game 1
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – LF Fumero – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P J. Wharton
TOP: RF J. Velazquez – CF J. Austin – LF J. Banuelos – SS J. Turner – C Cohen – 2B Archuleta – 3B Dutcher – 1B J. Myers – P A. Suarez

Both teams scored their first run with two outs in the bottom 2nd through an RBI single snuck by the second basemen by their respective #8 hitters Jake Flowe and John Myers, and neither pitcher looked like a good deal in the early going, especially Jimmy Wharton, who was still trying to find out how to live with the second bumhole he had been torn by the Indians six days earlier. Topeka loaded the bases on *nothing* in the bottom 3rd as Wharton drilled the leadoff man Javier Velazquez, walked John Austin, and after two pops got a grounder from Pat Cohen to Katzman that was thrown to first and there dropped by Jerry Morejon, loading the bases for disgruntled ex-Coon Ramon Archuleta, who drew a 3-2 bases-loaded walk to give his new team a 2-1 lead before Jeff Dutcher struck out in another full count. Wharton donated another leadoff walk to Myers in the fourth and surrendered that run on a bunt and Velazquez’ RBI single.

Wharton pitched six innings and walked five, and somehow trailed 3-1 (two earned) on just three hits allowed when he was removed from the game. The Raccoons hadn’t gotten a base hit since the second inning, and hopes were modest until Flowe hit a 1-out single in the seventh. Otal struck out, Yocum singled, and left-hander Ryan Croft gave up a liner to Katzman, but also right at Myers, who made the catch and ended the inning with the tying runs stranded. Ramirez pitched an inning, and Matt Burgan then got his first big league strikeout on Jason Turner, but also allowed two singles in the bottom 8th and was replaced with Pacheco against Myers. The southpaw nailed the first baseman to load the bases (and with a 1-2 pitch) but PH Wade Griffith then struck out to leave three on.

The Coons then threatened to disappear in order against old ninth-inning foe Cody Kleidon, who retired Corral and Gallo to begin the final inning before Josh Mireles pinch-hit and legged out an infield single. Jesus Guerrero batted for the pitcher and hit a gap RBI double for his career RBI. Yocum’s grounder to Dutcher ended the game regardless. 3-2 Buffaloes. Flowe 2-3, RBI; Mireles (PH) 1-1; Guerrero (PH) 1-1, 2B, RBI;

Langan was in the middle game against Walla then (free W for Langan at this stage), as the Buffos were not willing to bring the swingman Herbert into action quite yet.

Game 2
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – LF Fumero – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P Walla
TOP: CF J. Velazquez – 2B J. Austin – RF J. Banuelos – SS J. Turner – C Cohen – 1B J. Myers – LF L. Vazquez – 3B Dutcher – P Langan

The game started decidedly not good, as Javier Velazquez flicked a single, stole second, and came home on Jose Banuelos single to put Walla in a first-inning hole, and when Tyler Wharton legged out a leadoff single, he also legged out his own leg and left the game with some sort of ailment. Otal replaced him and scored three batters later as Fumero singled and was forced out on Corral’s grounder, but Gallo’s single then tied the game. Langan retired the battery, then was spotted a new lead on Luis Vazquez’ triple and Dutcher’s RBI single in the bottom 2nd…

When Otal doubled home Katzman in the top 3rd to tie THAT, Walla appeared to be pushing for that 6+ ERA by other means, like pitching right down the middle for a change. That kept the walks down and the outfielders busy, but the Buffos couldn’t get the balls to fall in besides a Pat Cohen double in the fourth that didn’t lead to a run, and the game remained tied at two through five innings. Morejon hit a leadoff single in the sixth, but was forced out on Otal’s grounder to short, and Otal was then caught stealing. Walla allowed leadoff singles to Jose Banuelos and Jason Turner in the inning, but Cohen hit into a double play and Myers grounded out to Yocum to keep the go-ahead runner on third base.

Walla was done after six inning and 87 mediocre pitches when his spot came up after Corral and Flowe had singled and one out in the top 7th. Van Otterdijk pinch-hit, singled, the bases were loaded, and Yocum actually did something other than strand everybody when he snuck an RBI single through between Turner and Dutcher, 3-2, but Katzman popped out and Morejon grounded out…

McMahan got two outs around a Dutcher double, and Nava got four to get the Critters and their flimsy lead through eight innings, with Langan still going for Topeka. Gallo and Flowe opened the ninth with long fly balls to right, one falling for a double and the other being caught by Banuelos on the warning track. Gallo moved to third on the play, then scored on a pinch-hit single by Guerrero for an insurance run. Guerrero was caught stealing to make the inning go by quicker, and then Valentin had the ball against the 5-6-7 batters in the bottom 9th. The first two disappeared quickly, but he then touched Vazquez’ rather loose uniform with a pitch and put a runner on base. Sandy Alvarez popped out to end the game. 4-2 Raccoons. T. Wharton 1-1; Fumero 2-4; Gallo 2-4, 2B, RBI; van Otterdijk (PH) 1-1; Guerrero (PH) 1-1, RBI;

The good news came from Luis Silva, who opined that Tyler Wharton had a mild intercostal strain. He was ruled out of the rubber game, but might be back in the lineup on Friday.

Game 3
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – 1B Fumero – RF Corral – LF Otal – CF Guerrero – 3B Gallo – C Brown – P Gaytan
TOP: CF J. Velazquez – 2B J. Austin – RF J. Banuelos – SS J. Turner – C Cohen – 1B J. Myers – LF S. Alvarez – 3B Dutcher – P Herbert

The Raccoons messily scored two runs in the first inning as Yocum singled, Fumero doubled, and after Corral whiffed badly, Herbert threw a wild pitch to get Yocum home. Otal then singled to get Fumero across, but his bid for a double was declined by Alvarez and he ended the inning tagged out at second base. Fumero doubled again in the third inning, this time after a 2-out single by Katzman, who held at third base and then was stranded when Corral made another poor out, along with Fumero. Gaytan allowed no base hits the first time through, but nicked Pat Cohen, who then hit into an inning-ending 1-6-3 double play after Banuelos and Turner slapped singles through the holes on the infield with one out in the fourth. Myers hit a leadoff single next, but was forced out by Alvarez and then Dutcher hit into a double play.

The 2-0 lead stood into the sixth inning where Corral hit a 2-out single to center, then was thrown out bidding for third base by Velazquez on Otal’s single to center. Gaytan in turn allowed a leadoff single to Herbert (…) and a wallbanger double (Otal also banged into the wall, fruitlessly) to John Austin in the bottom of the inning, losing half his lead. The other half, Yocum held on to, catching a howling 2-out liner by Turner to keep Austin from scoring. No, the collapse came an inning later, when Gaytan allowed a single to Myers, Yocum ****** up a grounder hit by Alvarez, and then Gaytan issued walks to Vazquez and HERBERT to tie the game. Velazquez drove in two runs before Gaytan was hooked for Ramirez, who gave up another run on an Austin single and then Banuelos hit into a double play to end the 4-run turn to the game.

Katzman and Fumero pointlessly put their ***** on base in the eighth inning only for Corral and Otal to whiff against the swingman Herbert to leave them stranded, and Cody Kleidon was then in to do the rest in the ninth inning, getting the first two pinch-hitters Mireles and Morejon out, but gave up a pinch-hit homer to George van Otterdijk. Flowe emptied the bench and singled in the #9 spot, and brought up Yocum once more as the tying run, but he flew out to center. 5-3 Buffaloes. Katzman 2-4, 2B; Fumero 2-3, BB, 2 2B; Otal 2-4, RBI; van Otterdijk (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI; Flowe (PH) 1-1;

I know, George, you have Dutch ancestors. But their third baseman is still Dutcher. *

Raccoons (31-36) @ Titans (33-30) – June 20-22, 2070

Nothing good ever happened in Boston, and nothing good ever happened with this roster, so here we were, about to get removed from a 2-2 tie in the season series. Boston was one game out in the division and ranked fifth in offense and sixth in pitching in the Continental League.

Projected matchups:
Gabriel Rios (2-0, 1.70 ERA) vs. Bryce Wallace (2-3, 3.69 ERA)
Vinny Morales (5-6, 3.87 ERA) vs. Adam McDonald (5-4, 3.74 ERA)
Jimmy Wharton (4-5, 4.57 ERA) vs. Aiden Shaw (2-4, 4.41 ERA)

Ace Mike Bell (6-3, 3.02 ERA) was one day away, but an off day on Thursday meant the Titans could skip him into the series. This made no difference for handedness, as this was the second consecutive team that only had righty starters to offer.

Game 1
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – LF Fumero – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF van Otterdijk – 3B Mireles – C Flowe – P Rios
BOS: SS E. Gonzales – CF Marcotte – 1B Goodwin – RF M. Garcia – 3B D. Miller – 2B Jer. White – C D. Johnson – LF T. Pritchard – P B. Wallace

Yocum singled, Katz doubled, and Fumero walked to begin the series, loading the bases for a quickly-recovered Tyler Wharton, who struck out (…) before Morejon drove in two runs with a single to right-center. Wallace nicked van Otterdijk to fill the bags back up, walked in a run against Josh Mireles, but then got Flowe to pop out and rung up Rios to get out of the first inning. Rios meanwhile faced an all-right-handed-hitting lineup except for Wallace (and the switch-hitter Curt Goodwin), and the first inning dragged on for a while, but the Titans eventually left Eddie Marcotte in scoring position after four long counts. Leadoff doubles by Yocum in the second and Mireles in the third then both led to extra runs. Fumero drove in the former and Flowe singled home the latter, 5-0, and a bunt, a wild pitch, and Yocum’s single scored Flowe to get to 6-0. Wallace threw another wild pitch, and then was yanked after a 2-out triple by Fumero added another run. Edgar Cornejo popped out Wharton to end the inning.

Rios piled up seven strikeouts in four innings, then ended up being chopped to bits in the fifth, which even began with two groundouts by Jeremy White and David Johnson. Tommy Pritchard then singled, Cornejo doubled and ripped out a leg (Tyler Riddle ran for him), and Edgar Gonzales’ and Curt Goodwin’s singles framed a Marcotte double and each drove in two runs. Rios was yanked without completing five innings and remained useless as a starter, with Lowry replacing him. He gave up another ******* double to Manuel Garcia before Danny Miller finally ******* grounded out to Katzman after six straight Titans had reached base with two down and four had scored. Lowry was just as bad, put Johnson and Pritchard on in the sixth before getting a double play, and then walked Gonzales and Goodwin in the seventh before getting the hook treatment himself. Nava and Gallo entered in a double switch at Mireles’ expense, and Nava got a double play grounder to Katzman from Garcia on the first pitch he threw, turning away another threat. He got a fly out from Miller in the eighth, but then left the game with a blister on his paw. Ramirez got the last two outs of the inning.

Tyler Gleason faced the Raccoons in the ninth, but put Katzman on right away. Katz stole second, leading to an intentional walk for Wharton after Fumero flew out. Morejon’s groundout moved them to scoring position, and van Otterdijk was down 0-2 before flicking a ball over Gonzales for a 2-run single that hopefully put the game away. Guerrero made the last out in the inning, replaced Wharton in center, and we stole the last three outs ith Pacheco, somehow. 9-4 Raccoons. Yocum 3-5, 2B, RBI; Katzman 2-5, 2B; Fumero 2-4, BB, 3B, 2B, 2 RBI; Morejon 2-5, 2 RBI;

Danny Nava would be bothered for a bit with the blister. He was day-to-day until perhaps early next week and the Raccoons had to think about more roster shenanigans, or just straight up firing Lowry for somebody that could get outs.

Game 2
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – LF Fumero – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P Morales
BOS: 3B D. Miller – CF Marcotte – C D. Johnson – RF M. Garcia – 2B Jer. White – 1B Goodwin – SS Robichaud – LF Padgett – P McDonald

Nobody scored in the early innings on Saturday, as the Raccoons wasted Katz and Wharton hits in the first inning, while Morales allowed leadoff singles to Cody Padgett and McDonald (on an 0-2 pitch!) in the bottom 3rd. The runners went to the corners, but he got a K on Miller and then a double play grounder from Marcotte to clean up.

Jake Flowe doubled home Gallo, who had forced out Corral, with two outs in the fourth inning to get a run on the board, but was immediately stranded when Morales flew out easily to Padgett. Yocum’s double and Fumero’s RBI single extended the lead to 2-0 in the following frame, which disintegrated when Fumero was caught stealing before Wharton singled and was picked off first base… Vinny Morales allowed one hit in every one of the middle innings, which included another hard-to-explain single by McDonald in the fifth, and then a solo bomb by Manuel Garcia in the sixth, which narrowed the lead down to 2-1.

I was starting to become slightly uneasy when McDonald hit a THIRD single off Morales with two outs in the bottom 7th, and that one sent Jared Robichaud to third base. McMahan was a confused replacement for Morales against the right-handed top of the order, but got a fly out to Corral from Miller and the Coons buggered out of the inning. With Nava nursing the paw, Ramirez tired, Lowry useless, and Burgan not trustworthy, the only right-handed option would have been Valentin. And the Raccoons waited and waited and waited until Johnson singled, White tripled, and Goodwin single them Titans a lead in the bottom of the eighth, and then went to Burgan, because the fan and the walls were already brown all over. Gleason was unimpressed with the Coons in the ninth. 3-2 Titans. Yocum 2-3, BB, 2B; T. Wharton 2-4, 2B; Flowe 2-3, 2B, RBI; Morales 6.2 IP, 8 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 6 K;

And then, for some nasty surprise, Mike Bell had pants on come Sunday.

Great.

Game 3
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – RF Corral – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – LF Otal – 3B Gallo – C Brown – P J. Wharton
BOS: SS E. Gonzales – CF Marcotte – 1B Goodwin – RF M. Garcia – 3B D. Miller – 2B Jer. White – C D. Johnson – LF Grulke – P M. Bell

The Titans went back to Friday’s playbook with another Raccoons left-hander appearing, and while Bell retired the Raccoons in order in the first, Jimmy Wharton immediately gave up a double to Gonzales, and the run on two groundouts after that. Otal hit a double in the second, but with two outs and no help from Gallo, and Jimmy Wharton singled in the third inning, not that that got him anywhere nice. He also walked three Titans that were all stranded between the second and third innings.

Tyler Wharton hit a leadoff single and made it to third base on Morejon’s double in the fourth inning. Those were the tying and go-ahead runs, and to anybody’s bafflement we actually managed to at least tie the game despite a K from Otal, when Gallo walked and Brown hit a soft RBI single. Wharton popped out and Yocum struck out on three pitches to leave the bases loaded once more. Portland then actually took the lead in the fifth on Katz, Corral, and Otal singles, and managed to leave another pair in scoring position on Gallo’s fly out to Kyle Grulke.

The real miracle was that Wharton didn’t fudge away the 2-1 lead right away despite giving up a double to Bell (…!) in the bottom 5th. He walked Marcotte with two outs, but the Titans were left stranded when Corral gave his body in a headlong catch on Curt Goodwin’s liner to right to keep them from scoring. Corral was actually fine and not hitting anything anyway, while Yocum batted with two outs and NOBODY on in the sixth and then hit a ******* triple. Katz singled him home, 3-1, but Corral wasn’t hitting anything and fanned.

Jimmyboy was gone after Miller hit a 1-out single in the bottom 6th, and it was also starting to rain. Ramirez replaced Wharton, gave up his run on White and Johnson screamers for hits, and I don’t know how Otal caught Tommy Pritchard’s 2-out rocket in the left-center gap, but that running robbery left two Titans stranded in scoring position in a 3-2 game.

But with their broken roster, Nava’s paw in tethers, and their dimwitted management, the Raccoons arrived at another dead end with their pitching in the seventh inning and sent out Matt Burgan against the right-handed lineup. The right-hander got right ended, allowed three hits to tie the game, and then a booming 3-run homer to Miller. Done emotionally and otherwise, we dropped in Lowry again to pitch the last five outs in another sulking loss, although the ninth inning brought right-hander Aiden Shaw for Boston, and before long a pair of 1-out singles from Katz and Corral, which brought Big Wharton back to the dish as the tying run. Wharton flew out to Marcotte, and Morejon hacked out on a 1-2 pitch at ******* eye level. 6-3 Titans. Katzman 3-5, RBI; Corral 2-5; Otal 2-4, 2B;

In other news

June 16 – A highly serious concussion ends the budding career of just 24-year-old VAN 1B Antonio Ramirez (.341, 9 HR, 21 RBI), who hit .329 with 26 HR and 69 RBI in just 431 career at-bats. Ramirez had slid head-first, after losing his batting helmet, into the planted knee of SAL 1B Jeremy McDermott the week before, and had remained unconscious on the field for ten minutes before being removed to a hospital.
June 16 – TIJ SP Jason Brenize (4-4, 1.67 ERA) leaves his start in the second inning with elbow soreness. The Condors are confident / hoping that this is a mild issue and he will only miss one start.
June 19 – TOP SP Vince Ellison (2-9, 4.75 ERA) was headed for elbow reconstruction surgery for torn ligaments and would be out for a full year.
June 19 – The Loggers hand the Crusaders a 15-0 thrashing. Three Milwaukee players have three hits each, but MIL 2B/SS Fidel Carrera (.251, 7 HR, 27 RBI) drives in the most runs (five) on just one hit – a grand slam – and a sac fly.
June 20 – The Wolves send 3B/RF/2B/CF Matt Roller (.335, 3 HR, 21 RBI) to the Warriors for two prospects.

Player of the Week (FL): NAS OF Phil LeVan (.296, 6 HR, 28 RBI), hitting .524 (11-21) with 2 HR, 6 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): CHA 1B Andy Metz (.303, 10 HR, 36 RBI), crashing .462 (12-26) with 4 HR, 7 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Awful. Just awful.

Ian Lowry is what you get when you sign a starting pitcher for $700k. And at some point Luis Silva will find out what bothers Nick Walla, surely. I’m sure it’s nothing good.

We also found out that our bullpen categorically ceases to function as soon as Danny Nava’s paw starts to peel, and isn’t it funny how we didn’t use Pedro Valentin AT ALL in that Titans series in which we led in all games late-ish, and managed to blow up two of them with peculiar bullpen choices?

Will this pain ever end?

As we next play three games with the Loggers at home the answer will be no. Thursday is off, and then the team is right back on the road again for six road games in Atlanta and Charlotte.

Fun Fact: Tyler Wharton has last hit a home run on May 30.

He’s gone 69 at-bats without a long one. (Cristiano squeals in the corner)

We’re that sort of sick-kinda-fun team, y’know.

+++

*I wholeheartedly apologize for being such a weapon.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (32-38) vs. Loggers (37-29) – June 23-25, 2070

The Loggers came in with a 4-game winning streak and a narrow lead in the division. The season series was even at three, but it didn’t look like the #2 offense (!?) and #2 pitching (!!!) in the league were here to play silly games. They meant business.

Projected matchups:
Nick Walla (5-5, 5.52 ERA) vs. Tom Delaney (4-5, 4.13 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (6-5, 3.25 ERA) vs. Matt Crist (7-4, 4.10 ERA)
Gabriel Rios (2-0, 2.38 ERA) vs. Danny Ortiz (6-5, 5.20 ERA)

We got the three starters with the highest ERA’s, as if that was gonna help us not give up nine runs a game and lose by six. Also three right-handers.

The Coons made a roster change on Monday, dumping Matt Burgan (0-1, 16.20 ERA) back down to AAA and brought up the next tosser for the bullpen carousel as Cody Childress returned to pitch garbage innings now. Juan Vega was designated for assignment to make room on the 40-man roster that couldn’t take any more chaff.

Game 1
MIL: SS Van Leeuwen – RF Da. Wright – C M. Rodriguez – 1B C. Ramirez – 2B F. Carrera – CF Parrish – LF Alaniz – 3B Shapiro – P Delaney
POR: 2B Yocum – 3B Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – RF Corral – SS Mireles – LF van Otterdijk – C Flowe – P Walla

The Loggers put Dave Wright and Cesar Ramirez on the corners and left them there against Walla in the first inning, Josh Mireles put Vince Shapiro on second base with a gross throwing error in the second inning, and Wright was on again the next time up, but was caught stealing, as Walla had another buys outing. He walked Ramirez to begin the fourth, but then struck out the next three batters for a sign of life.

The Raccoons scattered a hit per inning in the first three frames, the best effort being a van Otterdijk double that led nowhere, before Tyler Wharton bashed a leadoff homer to left in the bottom 4th for the first run of the game, ending a 70-AB homerless stretch for the slugger. Of course the Loggers reacted immediately with Shapiro singling to lead off the fifth and Walla then mishandled Delaney’s bunt to add another runner with nobody out. He remained aggressive on a bad bunt by Sean Van Leeuwen and took it to third base, and this time got the lead runner out. Wright whiffed, but Manuel Rodriguez walked, and the bases were loaded with two outs and Cesar Ramirez bringing his .348 stick with eight homers to the plate. Walla did a half-decent job of not letting himself get hurt and instead hurt Ramirez by breaking his thumb with a 2-2 pitch that got him in the hand, forced in the tying run, and made me facepaw so loud it was audible on the NWSN broadcast. Casey Ramsey ran for Ramirez, Fidel Carrera singled home two angry runs, and another game was probably in the bin. John Parrish grounded out to Mireles to end the inning.

Bottom 5th, and Flowe led off with a wallbanger double in right. Walla and Yocum grounded out to short, not offering a chance to advance, but Flowe scored when Katz singled to left-center with two outs. Alaniz threw home, allowing Katz to second, and he scored from there on Morejon’s single. Wharton and Corral also singled to right, and the latter brought in Morejon with the go-ahead run, 4-3. Mireles ended the inning with a fly to center, while Walla got the bottom of the order out in the sixth before being removed from the game.

“Garbage innings” for Cody Childress ended up being facing the top of the order with a 4-3 lead in the seventh, which ended up with a Wright single, Rodriguez homer, Ramsey single, and quick dismissal for Childress. The Coons got five outs from Pacheco instead, and then opened the bottom 8th with a Corral double and Mireles single off Nick Walters, putting the tying and go-ahead runs on the corners with nobody out. Luis Lerma entered and walked the Otter, then was removed for lefty Neil Mongillo. Fumero batted for Flowe and tied the game with a sac fly to right, and when Jesus Guerrero batted for Pacheco, he drove a ball to left-center for the go-ahead RBI double…! Yocum then grounded out poorly, Katz walked to fill the bases, and Morejon’s fly to right was caught by Wright, leaving the bases loaded and Pedro Valentin, who was WELL RESTED, with no cushion. Van Leeuwen tried to bunt his way on to begin the ninth, but eventually grounded out conventionally, and Wright and Rodriguez were rung up. 6-5 Raccoons. Katzman 2-4, BB, RBI; Morejon 2-5, RBI; T. Wharton 2-4, HR, RBI; Corral 2-4, 2B, RBI; Guerrero (PH) 1-1, 2B, RBI;

Cesar Ramirez was expected to be out until the end of July with the broken thumb, and the Loggers were NOT happy.

Game 2
MIL: SS Van Leeuwen – 1B C. Ramsey – LF C. Dominguez – RF Da. Wright – 2B F. Carrera – CF Parrish – C Guitreau – 3B Shapiro – P Crist
POR: 2B Fumero – 3B Katzman – 1B Morejon – CF T. Wharton – RF Corral – SS Mireles – LF Guerrero – C Flowe – P Gaytan

Tony Gaytan was not nearly on pace to match his 36 homers allowed from last season, but the Loggers sure lended him a hand in the game on Tuesday. Fidel Carrera went deep against him in both of his first two at-bats, the first coming with Dave Wright already on base in the second inning, and in the fourth he went for back-to-back solo bombs with Parrish, which gave the Loggers a 4-0 lead. Gaytan would linger until the seventh inning when he gave up a double to Shapiro and an RBI single to the opposing pitcher Crist, and that was about the story of his game. Crist was pitching a 5-hit shutout at the stretch, but was suddenly taken deep by Josh Mireles in the bottom 7th for a solo homer. It was unfortunately not a major rally starter, despite Guerrero then adding a single. The Loggers didn’t score against McMahan in the eighth, but Tommy Guitreau hit a solo home run off Danny Nava in the ninth, Nava pitching for the first time since that blister had popped up (quite literally). The bloody thing was then bleeding after the game, which the Raccoons lost by a bunch. 6-1 Loggers. Morejon 2-4, 2B; Yocum (PH) 1-1; Mireles 2-4, HR, RBI; Guerrero 2-3, 2B;

The Loggers then swapped infielder Casey Ramsey (.357, 0 HR, 13 RBI) back to the Rebels (where he had come from) for MR Raul Salas (0-2, 8.33 ERA, 1 SV) and a prospect.

Game 3
MIL: 2B F. Carrera – SS Van Leeuwen – C M. Rodriguez – LF C. Dominguez – 3B Di. Mendoza – RF Alaniz – CF Pritchett – 1B Kiger – P D. Ortiz
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – RF Fumero – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – 3B Gallo – LF Guerrero – C Brown – P Rios

Michael Kiger, the #24 pick in the 2068 draft, was in the starting lineup for the first time in his ABL career, previously having made two appearances off the bench. He hit a single to begin the third inning his first time up, Rios walked the bags full behind him, but Carlos Dominguez’ groundout stranded three runners and kept the Coons 1-0 ahead from an unlikely 2-out run in the bottom 2nd where Sam Brown had singled and then scored from first on a Rios double, but Rios then overexcitedly overran second base and was thrown out by Mario Alaniz. Yocum drew a leadoff walk in the bottom 3rd, stole his 16th base, and then was plated by Wharton with a 2-out double. Morejon hit a long fly, but Alaniz ran it down in the gap to end the inning.

Jerry Morejon was not denied his 40th RBI in the fifth inning, when he also batted with two outs and drove in Katzman with the third single of the inning (Wharton was also on base again). Gallo, who had found sub-.200 territory by now, then popped out. Rios meanwhile was 3-hitting the Loggers through six, looking mighty fancy after that wobbly third inning. He ran a few long counts for three outs against the 6-7-8 batters in the seventh, and then Ortiz loaded the bases with the Coons’ 2-3-4 batters and nobody out. Morejon grounded into a force at the plate – nifty play by Gold Glover Carrera – and Gallo grounded into a fielder’s choice at second, but that at least got a runner home to make it 4-0. Otal batted for a hitless Guerrero and rolled an RBI single that didn’t reach the outfield grass, and knocked out Ortiz, but Brown then flew out easily to Alaniz.

Rios returned for the eighth, walked PH Randy Fisher and then drilled Carrera – somehow – in the inside thigh, and the infielder eventually left the game, limping and bent over in agony. Shapiro replaced him, while McMahan replaced Rios, grinding the 2-3-4 batters for a fielder’s choice grounder, a pop to Brown, and another groundout to Yocum, and didn’t allow any runs. Fumero drove in Katzman for an extra run in the bottom 8th, and Victor Ramirez put the lid on to finish a combined 3-hit shutout against THE LOGGERS. 6-0 Furballs! Katzman 2-3, 2 BB; Fumero 2-5, 2B, RBI; T. Wharton 2-3, 2 BB, 2B, RBI; Otal (PH) 1-1 RBI; Rios 7.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 3 BB, 6 K, W (3-0) and 1-2, 2B, RBI;

Fidel Carrera cried all the way to the airport, I hear, and would be day-to-day for the rest of the week, but the Loggers were pretty angry regardless because of the Ramirez injury.

Not sure I made it better with the Raccoons-themed get-well card I had Maud send to them. It has a smiling little raccoon with a broken leg in a hospital bed, and the text “Get Well Furry Soon!” …

Raccoons (34-39) @ Knights (46-24) – June 27-29, 2070

After the CL’s second-best offense, why not play the best offense? We got to visit Atlanta Thunderdome (5.4 runs per game), and the worst part was that they somehow also had the best pitching!? They had a +137 run differential thanks to the best offense, the best pen, the best defense, and the second-best rotation. Catcher Justin Hart was hitting .320 with 14 homers and 70 RBI, or one for every team game played (although he had played in only 65). They had a few injuries, most notably starter Adam Lunn, but c’mon! Give the Coons a *chance*! … Atlanta was already up 3-0 in the season series, so I wasn’t sure why we even made the trip.

Projected matchups:
Vinny Morales (5-6, 3.68 ERA) vs. Scott Triebwasser (6-2, 3.26 ERA)
Jimmy Wharton (4-5, 4.50 ERA) vs. Rob Wilkinson (6-1, 3.11 ERA)
Nick Walla (5-5, 5.44 ERA) vs. Brett Bebout (8-2, 3.80 ERA)

No southpaws in sight. Or wins.

Game 1
POR: 2B Yocum – 3B Katzman – LF Fumero – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – SS Mireles – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Morales
ATL: CF J. Soto – SS Guangorena – C Hart – 1B DiPrimio – 3B Schomer – 2B J. Munoz – RF Troxel – LF C. Cardenas – P Triebwasser

The Coons got nowhere with the three runners they had in the first two innings, which included Yocum getting caught stealing by Hart, and Morales almost made it through the lineup once just fine, but then gave up a leadoff single to Triebwasser in the bottom 3rd, and the pesky tosser stole second base and then scored on two groundouts by Jorge Soto and Tomas Guangorena…! It was his second stolen base of the season.

The Raccoons had a hard time getting on base, and when they did with Fumero in the sixth, got themselves caught stealing again before Wharton could hit another single off Triebwasser. Morales, who relied heavily on the defense, was chewed up for 97 pitches in six innings, at the end of which the Triebwasser run was still the only marker on the board while both teams had scattered five base hits.

The game went into the bin for good in the seventh when Childress ended up with the ball and cluelessly filled the bases before drilling Guangorena to force in a run. He got nobody out, and when Nava replaced him got Hart, Kris DiPrimio, and Jon Schomer out in order, but at the cost of two more runs on Hart’s groundout and DiPrimio’s sac fly. Ian Lowry then allowed two hits but no runs in the eighth. Triebwasser went seven shutout innings, and the Knights’ Angel Alba (waves hi to ex-Coon) and Alvaro Garza didn’t blink either. 4-0 Knights. Fumero 2-4;

The Knights’ Jorge Munoz (.341, 1 HR, 10 RBI) left the game late and was on the DL by Saturday with patellar tendinitis.

And Cody Childress (0-1, 9.95 ERA) was back in AAA for being useless. Next warm body: Holzmeister. AGAIN.

Game 2
POR: 2B Yocum – 3B Katzman – LF Fumero – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – SS Mireles – RF Corral – C Flowe – P J. Wharton
ATL: CF J. Soto – 2B J. King – 1B DiPrimio – 3B Schomer – RF S. Valdez – SS Guangorena – C L. Marquez – LF Troxel – P Wilkinson

The Coons met Wilkinson with three straight singles to load the bases without making an out, and then Wharton struck out, Morejon struck out, and Mireles … grounded out to short. Corral and Flowe reached base to begin the second, but after a bunt by Jimmyboy, Yocum barely got a run home with an infield single before Katz popped out and Fumero flew out, and Atlanta immediately erased the lead when Jimmy Wharton walked Santiago Valdez and Guangorena doubled him home in the same inning.

Big Wharton and DiPrimio exchanged solo homers in the third inning, and the Coons then didn’t reach at all in the next two innings before Atlanta went up 3-2 on straight 2-out singles by Joe King, DiPrimio, and Schomer in the bottom 5th… Mireles hit a double to knock out Wilkinson in the sixth, but was stranded by former Critters left-hander Evan Alvey, who blew the lead in the seventh then (those Coons genes!) with another bushel of singles hit by Yocum, Fumero, and Big Wharton, tying the game at three. Van Otterdijk and Mireles then made poor outs on the infield to leave the remaining runners stranded.

Bottom 7th, Ben Ellis doubled off Victor Ramirez in a pinch-hitting assignment and the go-ahead run was in scoring position right away… Ramirez rung up Soto, but walked King, and when DiPrimio grounded to short, Mireles threw away the easy-as-pie 6-4-3 grounder for an error and the bases were loaded instead. Somehow Ramirez got pops from Schomer and Valdez to prevent an escalation, and the Knights stranded all their runners. The eighth saw Flowe left on base after hitting a single, while Erik Swain’s appearance in the ninth inning left me with little hope for a friendly resolution of the 3-3 tie in regulation. He killed the 2-3-4 batters on sight, but after Pacheco nailed John Baxley to begin the bottom 9th, Nava cleaned up behind him and the game went into overtime.

Swain still told the Coons nope in the tenth, despite a Corral single, and Nava got around a Schomer double to lead off the bottom 10th to extend the game. The Coons passed on Yocum’s 1-out single in the 11th, and then lost the game with Lowry in the bottom of the inning as he drilled Tom Troxel, walked Baxley, got a grounder, and then threw a wild pitch to allow Troxel across to score. 4-3 Knights. Yocum 4-6, RBI; Fumero 2-6; T. Wharton 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; Flowe 2-4, BB;

…

Game 3
POR: 2B Yocum – SS Katzman – LF Fumero – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – C Flowe – 3B Gallo – P Walla
ATL: CF J. Soto – 2B J. King – C Hart – 1B DiPrimio – 3B Schomer – RF Troxel – SS Guangorena – LF Valencia – P Bebout

Walla gave up a run with a single, walk, RBI single sequence from King, Hart, and DiPrimio right in the first inning, but Tyler Wharton went deep in the second to tie it up again. Walla nailed Guangorena and walked Soto in the second inning, and I had a hunch another big inning was just around the corner. Hart drew a leadoff walk in the third, but was forced out and the go-ahead run never got off first base in the inning for Atlanta; but it was just all a bit **** again. And they also fleeced him for *70* pitches in just three innings.

Gallo, already useless at the dish, then threw a grounder away for more traffic in the fourth inning, but the Knights still didn’t break through. Gallo reached on a Schomer error himself in the top of the fifth, but was forced out on Walla’s ****** bunt, and I was becoming quite depressed at this stage of proceedings.

Walla ended up being knocked out in the sixth on hits by Guangorena (who was forced out by Rafael Valencia) and – with two outs! – Bebout, and McMahan allowed the go-ahead single to the switch-hitting Soto. He walked King as well before Hart popped out. Holzmeister appeared in the seventh, walked the bags full for no outs, and then was replaced with Ramirez. Guangorena hit a fly to left that was caught by Fumero, who turned it into a 7-2 double play by hammering out the sluggish DiPrimio at the plate. Lorenzo Marquez pinch-hit, and also flew out to Fumero, and nobody scored – but two runs scored for Atlanta in the eighth with serial incompetence from Yocum (leadoff error), Pacheco, and Valentin. Swain sniffed out the Raccoons in no time. 4-1 Knights. Corral 2-3, BB;

In other news

June 24 – Rebels SP Eric Stengel (8-4, 3.36 ERA) throws a 3-hit shutout against the Buffaloes and takes a 4-0 victory.
June 25 – The Aces beat the Thunder, 10-9 in 17 innings. Both teams scored three runs in the 14th inning for added agony. Thunder teammates 1B Ian Stone (.297, 14 HR, 36 RBI) and OF Danny Perez (.251, 8 HR, 35 RBI) both went 0-for-7, with Stone punching a golden sombrero.
June 26 – SAC INF John Schmidt (.286, 0 HR, 16 RBI) hits the DL with back spasms and is expected to be out until early August.
June 27 – Falcons SP Gary Peoples (3-4, 4.10 ERA) spins a 3-hit shutout to beat the Crusaders, 6-0.
June 27 – NAS SP Justin Taylor (2-6, 5.20 ERA) would have pitched a 1-hit shutout against Sacramento, but his team didn’t score either, and Taylor instead puts the first two batters on in the tenth inning, allows a triple to Stingers OF/2B/SS Mike Pinault (.263, 13 HR, 50 RBI) and takes the 2-0 loss.
June 27 – IND 1B Miguel Medina (.263, 0 HR, 9 RBI) puts out five hits, including a double and three RBI, in an 8-6 win against the Aces, which wasn’t bad for a 39-year-old bench player.
June 27 – The second batter of the Canadiens-Condors game, VAN LF/CF Jeff Hawkins (.288, 5 HR, 13 RBI) goes deep for a home run and that remains the only tally in the 1-0 Vancouver win.
June 28 – The Miners deal INF/RF Victor Morales (.306, 4 HR, 21 RBI) to the Stars for two prospects, including #82 CF/LF/2B Willie Cordova.
June 28 – San Francisco trades LF/RF Ian Streng (.258, 4 HR, 31 RBI) and over $1.3M in cash to Washington in exchange for three prospects.
June 29 – WAS SP Bobby MacDonald (8-5, 3.42 ERA) throws a 1-hit shutout to beat the Wolves, 5-0. The lone Wolves hit is a third-inning single by OF/3B Luis Carmona (.333, 2 HR, 16 RBI), batting eighth. He’s then caught stealing.

Player of the Week (FL): CIN OF Anthony Schneider (.275, 4 HR, 34 RBI), batting .571 (12-21) with 5 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): VAN 1B Hector Moreno (.243, 6 HR, 28 RBI), slashing .591 (13-22) with 1 HR, 6 RBI

Complaints and stuff

(has face in paws)

How can they be so useless…?? Another week in which we failed to break three runs scored per game, and another casual sweep in which we might just as well not have bothered to bat at all.

Cristiano Carmona pointed to a discrepancy in Nick Walla’s ERA (5.30 AFTER lowering it for four outings in a row…) and FIP (3.83). Which meshes with my eyeball analysis that one catastrophic inning seems to happen to Walla pretty much every time he puts pants on. Jimmy Wharton is no better. I’m still waiting for Rios to remember that he can’t be a starter.

J.P. Gallo is 0-for-his-last-20, with an RBI groundout this week. Which means he’s driven in more runs in his last 20 at-bats than Katzman.

What an exhausting, exhausting, exhausting team. I am so exhausted.

Right-hander Mike Davis, who made ten appearances for the Raccoons between the last two seasons, is out for the year after suffering a torn labrum while pitching with the Alley Cats.

Next week: at Falcons, and then we’re home for the final homestand before the All Star Game, which is good because I need to refill the subscription for my jackhammering headaches, and the funny blue ones with the smiley faces that keep me from murdering people. We will play 11 with Indy, New York, and the stinking Elks on the homestand.

Fun Fact: The Raccoons have so far played three CL South teams this month and have been swept by all of them.

May 30-June 1 @ Aces
June 3-5 vs. Condors
June 27-29 @ Knights

An absolutely useless 0-7 against the South in June, never scoring more than three runs. Merely terrible at 7-12 against the rest of the league, though! Tah!

Oh yeah, the Falcons series starts on Monday.

(presses face deeper into his paws)

[DD Martin]

All those bats and they can’t figure out how to score stinking runs….I feel your pain

[Westheim]

Raccoons (34-42) @ Falcons (37-38) – June 30-July 2, 2070

The teams had similar run differentials at -34 for the Raccoons and -38 for the Falcons, who had the worst bullpen by ERA, gave up the second-most runs overall, had no speed, but hit the third-most dingers, and that against a team that loved nothing more than giving up freebies. We were up 2-1 in the season series ,and they had Edgar Mauricio, Brady Terrell, and Tetsuharu Ishii on the DL.

Projected matchups:
Tony Gaytan (6-6, 3.46 ERA) vs. Ayahito Ochi (10-2, 2.73 ERA)
Gabriel Rios (3-0, 2.03 ERA) vs. Dan Speake (4-7, 5.30 ERA)
Vinny Morales (5-7, 3.53 ERA) vs. Gary Peoples (3-4, 4.10 ERA)

Ochi was one of two southpaws in the rotation, the other being recent high draft pick Scott Bickerton, who also had a high ERA at 8.71 …

Game 1
POR: 2B Yocum – 1B Fumero – 3B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – RF van Otterdijk – SS Mireles – C S. Brown – LF Guerrero – P Gaytan
CHA: 2B J. Brown – SS Tr. Taylor – C O. Matos – 1B A. Metz – 3B P. Weber – RF T. Lopez – LF E. Mullen – CF A. Campbell – P Ochi

Tyler Wharton drove in Adam Yocum and his leadoff walk with a 2-out single in the first inning, but a collective effort in stupidity gave the lead away in the second inning. Gaytan nicked Paul Weber leading off, allowed a double to Tony Lopez, and then a Mireles error and enough productive groundouts brought in two runs for the Falcons to flip the score to 2-1 Charlotte after the second inning, but with both teams having gotten only one base knock. Getting hits with runners on was one of those things for this highly annoying team, like when Ochi nicked Yocum and walked Fumero to begin the top 3rd, and the middle of the order disappeared silently into the night, scoring nothing and nobody. Mireles drew a walk to begin the fourth, but was doubled off by Sam Brown.

The score remained 2-1 through six innings, after which both starters left the game due to excessive pitch counts, Gaytan’s being at 99 and his spot led off the seventh. Benito Otal wasted everybody’s time there, but Yocum singled off right-hander Jose Lugo and stole his 17th base. He gained third when Eddie Mullen dropped Fumero’s fly to left, and before the middle of the order could do more stupid ****, Lugo balked the tying run across. Katz singled Fumero to third base, Wharton whiffed, but van Otterdijk found the go-ahead RBI single in left-center. David Gooding replaced Lugo, but gave up another RBI single to Mireles before Brown grounded out.

The 4-2 lead then went to whatever bullpen was there as it was being persistently abused. Pacheco got one out on his third straight day on the hill, and Nava got two, pitching on the third of four days. McMahan retired the Falcons in order in the eighth, setting it up nicely for Valentin, who blew the whole shebang by giving up a leadoff walk to ex-Coons prospect Isaiah Birth, and then a homer to former Elks foe Adam Campbell. Instead of then doing the honorable thing and falling on his own sword after giving up two more hits to Matt Bakker and Josh Brown, he then retired Trent Taylor and Oscar Matos and sent the game to extras, for which the Raccoons had no pitchers. Holzmeister was sent out on his own third straight day (roster moves coming…) after the Coons wasted infield singles (plural!) by Corral and Brown (!) in the tenth inning. He walked Andy Metz right away; the slugger was run for by Rodger Houkes, who stopped at third with nobody out on Paul Weber’s double to right. Mike Moquin’s grounder was fired home in time by Mireles to get Houkes out at the plate, and Katzman REPEATED that trick on a grounder to third by Eddie Mullen…! Campbell grounded out to Morejon at first, and this stupid game continued.

Holzmeister – in what was without a doubt well within the definition of animal abuse – then pitched a second inning and walked Bakker to get going. The Falcons had no pinch-hitters left for Orazio Cecere, who had just done two scoreless innings on the Critters, and then had Holzmeister misfield his bunt for an error. Taylor’s comebacker was taken to third by Holzmeister – for another out in odd places – he struck out Matos, and then struck out Carlos Mora. And this stupid game kept going – at least until Ian Lowry got hold of the baseball in the bottom 12th and allowed a walk and three hits to just five batters. 5-4 Falcons. Yocum 1-2, BB; Katzman 2-6; Corral (PH) 1-2; Brown 2-5, BB; Holzmeister 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 2 K;

Interlude: Trade

That was the end for Ian Lowry (4-5, 5.23 ERA) in brown. He was made available immediately after the end of the game, and various offers actually came in. He ended up being traded to the Bayhawks early on July 1 or late on June 30, depending on which end of the country you were dealing from. The Raccoons received infielder Rafael Murcia (.273, 5 HR, 34 RBI), who had just turned 28 and had been the bottom feeder on those murder Loggers lineup for a few years. He had won a Gold Glove at third base. He wasn’t much of a hitter, but neither was J.P. Gallo.

The Raccoons axed no fewer than four players (three pitchers) in total after this game. In addition to Lowry, Jason Holzmeister (0-1, 1.77 ERA) and Antonio Pacheco (1-0, 4.91 ERA) were demoted because they were completely used up and we needed arms, arms, arms. We also optioned Jesus Guerrero (.186, 0 HR, 3 RBI) to make room on the roster.

The new (“new”) pitchers were: a pair of known rotten apples in Matt Schmieder and John Reynolds, and then a player to make his debut, 2065 second-rounder, right-hander Steve George, who had both started and closed so far this year and would probably do neither for the Raccoons. He had a 90mph fastball that was thoroughly bashable, and control was known to be iffy.

Matt Burgan and Jamie Colter ended up on waivers to make room on the 40-man roster.

Raccoons (34-42) @ Falcons (37-38) – June 30-July 2, 2070

Game 2
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – RF Corral – 3B Gallo – C Flowe – P Rios
CHA: CF E. Mullen – 2B J. Brown – C O. Matos – 3B P. Weber – SS Tr. Taylor – 1B A. Metz – RF Bakker – LF A. Campbell – P Speake

Jerry Morejon’s groundout to second with two aboard, two out, and a 3-0 count in his favor was a splendid start to a new month. At least, when Tyler Wharton popped out with two on and two out in the fifth inning, he did so in an 0-2 count. In between, not a whole damn lot happened in the game, which was still scoreless. Rios had given up a leadoff double to Bakker in the bottom 3rd, but a groundout and whiffs by Speake and Mullen kept Bakker on base.

Rios came up to bat with three on and one out in the sixth inning after a bloop single by Corral, a walk drawn by Gallo, and a Flowe single through the left side. Assuming that he could ill do worse than the average position player on the team, we left him in to bat, and he grounded out on a 3-1 count, confirming our projections. He even got the game’s first run home with that! Speake then plunked Yocum on a 2-2 pitch, so hardly intentional, before Fumero hit a soft RBI single. The big bash remained on the wishlist; instead Katzman popped out.

The game continued largely noiselessly from Rios’ side, as he allowed two singles in the seventh, but Josh Brown removed himself by being caught stealing before Paul Weber’s 2-out looper fell in. Taylor then flew out easily. Straight hits by the 1-2-3 hitters in the eighth added a 2-out run before Wharton flew out to Campbell to end the inning. Rios completed eight shutout innings on 110 pitches, which was deemed enough, and Murcia made his Coons debut batting for Gallo in the ninth, but flying out to center. Victor Ramirez then ended the game with a 1-2-3 ninth. 3-0 Raccoons. Yocum 2-4; Fumero 3-5, 2B, RBI; Katzman 3-5, RBI; Corral 3-5, 2B; Flowe 3-5; Rios 8.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 6 K, W (4-0);

Where’s THIS Gabriel Rios been the last few years…!?

Game 3
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – 3B Murcia – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Morales
CHA: RF T. Lopez – SS Tr. Taylor – C O. Matos – 1B A. Metz – 3B P. Weber – LF Bakker – 2B Moquin – CF A. Campbell – P Peoples

Murcia was part of the 5-6-7 group that loaded the bases with a single, two walks, and nobody out in the second inning of the rubber game, just before Jake Flowe crashed into a 4-6-3 double play. That scored a run, but left Murcia on third to Morales with two outs – but Vinny slapped a single through the right side to extend the score to 2-0. Yocum lined out to Weber, while Gary Peoples also got a single in his first at-bat of the day, but that came in the bottom 3rd and with nobody on base, and with no support behind him, either. While Morales allowed two hits but struck out nobody the first time through, the Raccoons stranded Jerry Morejon, who hit a double into the leftfield corner to begin the top of the fourth. Matos, Weber, and Bakker then loaded the bases with three singles in the bottom 4th, and Morales couldn’t get Moquin out either, and surrended the lead on a 1-out, 2-run single to center. Campbell popped out and Peoples grounded out to leave another two runners on base.

Morales allowed another run on FOUR straight singles by the 3-4-5-6 batters in the fifth, for ten hits total, and was then removed from the game after Moquin flew out to Fumero. Reynolds pitched a scoreless sixth after that, then got into possession of a lead after he was pinch-hit for with van Otterdijk, who made the second out with nobody on base. Yocum and Fumero then reached, and Katzman drove a triple into the right-center gap to flip the score to 4-3 before Wharton made his fourth useless out of the game. Morejon hit a home run off Freddie DeWitt after a scoreless inning from Nava, after which Murcia doubled and was left stranded by the bottom of the order.

This time, McMahan blew the lead in the eighth, issuing a leadoff walk to Bakker, then a double to Moquin. Campbell’s groundout and Carlos Mora’s pinch-hit single scored the tying runs, and the Raccoons were back to square one, as usual. Katz got a 2-out single off Cecere in the ninth, but Wharton struck out, and a scoreless inning by Schmieder sent the game to extras. GREAT. Murcia hit another double off Cecere, but overran second base and was tagged out in the tenth inning, and to anybody’s surprise, Schmieder kept the game going. Flowe drove a liner to right for a leadoff double in the 11th against Jose Lugo, followed by Otal, Yocum, and Fumero making three more piss poor outs and being ******* unable to get the run home. A leadoff single by Katz in the 12th led exactly nowhere, and by now the Coons were out of pitchers AGAIN. Corral and Yocum were left on the corners in the top 13th by Fumero, and now the Coons had to yank Jimmy Wharton from the Thursday start to go out and pitch ******** relief. He lost the game in two innings with a leadoff walk to Weber and Moquin and Campbell singles in the 14th. 6-5 Falcons. Katzman 4-7, 3B, 2 RBI; Morejon 3-7, HR, 2B, RBI; Murcia 2-5, BB

********.

Raccoons (35-44) vs. Indians (37-41) – July 3-6, 2070

The Portland Plonkers returned home to seamlessly continue the pitching carousel ahead of a 4-game series against Indy. The Indians ranked seventh in runs scored and sixth in runs allowed, but somehow had the best rotation against a horrendous bullpen. They were up 5-3 in the season series and had a bevvy of injuries with Justin Esch, Matt Martin, Guillermo Lujan, Wally Leggett, and Juan Pera all on the DL. Somehow they still found five starters, though.

The Raccoons were in crisis with Jimmy Wharton getting burned (for the loss) on Wednesday. There was no sensible spot start option available – Harrison Hunt and Val Centeno had made the last two starts for the Alley Cats. We resorted to Edgar Gutierrez, who was recalled from AAA and replaced Schmieder (0-0, 4.50 ERA). No other moves appeared feasible despite the chaos that was consuming the pitching staff. Gutierrez had only two-and-a-half pitches, but that still seemed less ******ed than sending out 2070 Nick Walla on three days’ rest after 109 pitches the last time out.

Projected matchups:
Edgar Gutierrez (0-0, 3.04 ERA) vs. Pablo Apodaca (0-3, 5.11 ERA)
Nick Walla (5-6, 5.30 ERA) vs. Mike DeWitt (7-4, 3.25 ERA)
Tony Gaytan (6-6, 3.44 ERA) vs. Victor Perez (6-5, 2.80 ERA)
Gabriel Rios (4-0, 1.75 ERA) vs. Jorge Flores (9-6, 3.01 ERA)

If it helped, the Indians also sent a reliever in the opener as Apodaca had last pitched on Sunday AND Monday. Him and DeWitt were both left-handed. The rest of their starters were right-handers.

And I was very, very tired. Katzman and Wharton (after an 0-7) got days off since nothing mattered anyway.

Game 1
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – 1B M. Rogers – C A. Gomez – RF T. Torres – SS Valadez – 2B R. Cabrera – 3B E. Pacheco – P Apodaca
POR: 2B Yocum – 3B Murcia – 1B Fumero – LF van Otterdijk – RF Corral – SS Mireles – C Flowe – CF Otal – P Gutierrez

Gutierrez survived the first inning unharmed and then Yocum and Fumero hit singles and Apodaca walked the Otter in a full count. Corral hit an RBI single to center, Mireles dropped an RBI single in front of Tony Torres, Flowe brought in a run with a groundout to Emilio Pacheco, and Otal strung a 2-run single to right, also dropping in front of Torres. Gutierrez, already up 5-0, then rolled a single up the middle. Apodaca walked Yocum to refill the bases, Murcia hit an RBI single, and Fumero finally lined out to Fernando Valadez, ending the 6-run inning.

Of course Gutierrez then put the first three faces on the bases in the second inning, walking Torres and allowing hits to Valadez and Rich Cabrera, who got an RBI, as did Pacheco for a run-scoring groundout. Eddie Menchaca pinch-hit for Apodaca, but made outs along with Jose Hilario. Valadez and Cabrera would hit more singles the second time up against Gutierrez in the fourth, but Pacheco killed the inning with a double play grounder to Mireles. But Gutierrez at least achieved the basic target of pitching five innings without blowing a 6-run lead (entirely), and looked he had another inning in him after 61 pitches – and the Raccoons needed another inning dearly. He was thus not hit for when his spot came up in the bottom 5th with Mireles on second and Otal on first, and two outs. Kao-Kan Ngui, in his fourth inning of admirable relief, fell to 3-1 against him, then gave up a single up the middle, and Mireles scored to extend the lead to 7-2. Willie Castellanos replaced Ngui and got Yocum to pop out.

Gutierrez got around a leadoff single by Matt Rogers in the sixth and then got back out for the right-handed bottom third of the order in the seventh. He got two outs before Miguel Medina’s pinch-hit double sent him packing. Reynolds replaced him, threw a wild pitch, walked Hilario, and then got Malcolm Spicer to whiff. Jake Flowe hit a 2-run homer off Tim Tennant after the stretch, after which Otal, Morejon, and Yocum strung together three singles to fill the bases. Murcia popped out to center, but Fumero drove in two runs with a liner to center. Tyler Wharton batted for Reynolds in the #4 spot, walked, and Corral flew out to leave three runners on base. The Coons turned the ball over to Steve George, who got the last six outs of the game. 11-2 Furballs. Yocum 2-4, BB; Fumero 3-5, 2 RBI; Mireles 4-5, 2B, RBI; Otal 4-5, 2 RBI; Gutierrez 6.2 IP, 7 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 3 K, W (1-0) and 2-3, RBI; George 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

J.P. Gallo entered the game when we emptied the bench late in the game and ended up playing third base. He strained his shoulder on the final play of the game behind George, and since he batted all of a buck-ninety, this was a great excuse to get rid of him for a couple of weeks. While Luis Silva opined he’d be ready in a week, we’d give him two, and three more in St. Pete for “rehab”, if the league let us.

The Coons called up Javy Carpio from AAA. He was the face acquired from the Rebs and getting blastered for a 21.60 ERA in his first four relief outings of the season. The ERA in AAA was 3.26, and if he was still useless as volume option, we had no qualms to release his Cuban ***.

Game 2
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – 1B M. Rogers – RF T. Torres – SS Valadez – 2B R. Cabrera – C M. Reed – 3B E. Pacheco – P M. DeWitt
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Fumero – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 3B Murcia – 1B Morejon – RF van Otterdijk – C Brown – P Walla

While DeWitt retired a dozen Raccoons in a row without having to look over a shoulder, Nick Walla struggled from the start and scattered four hits in the first two innings, and allowed a run on Mark Reed’s RBI single with two gone in the top 2nd that scored Tony Torres’ leadoff double. Tyler Wharton hit a single and was stranded in the bottom 5th, while Walla was riding the defense again, getting only two strikeouts through five innings. DeWitt got him for a single in the fifth, and Reed hit another single in the seventh, but they all were left on. Wharton also hit another single in the seventh, but didn’t even get to brush the dirt out of his pants while on base because when he turned left and went for second base, he was thrown out by Torres. Walla allowed a second run in the eighth on a soft leadoff single by Jose Hilario, who stole second and then came in on two productive outs. Walla was then done after 104 pitches and without getting any run support. Mireles pinch-hit for Morejon in the bottom 8th and hit a single, and then was immediately doubled off by van Otterdijk to end the inning.

Victor Ramirez held Indy from adding on in the ninth before Corral batted for Brown and made a quick out against DeWitt in the bottom 9th. Otal then singled, and so did Yocum, and the tying runs were on base. The Indians rested confident in DeWitt’s abilities, which were undisputed, and Fumero **** into a 5-4-3 double play to end the game. 2-0 Indians. T. Wharton 2-3; Mireles (PH) 1-1; Otal 1-1; Walla 8.0 IP, 7 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 2 K, L (5-7);

Fumero had Saturday off, and Sunday would probably be a day off for Adam Yocum ahead of another full week’s worth of games.

Not that it mattered who hit holes into the air at any given moment…

Game 3
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – 1B M. Rogers – C A. Gomez – RF T. Torres – SS Valadez – 2B R. Cabrera – 3B Leggett – P V. Perez
POR: 2B Yocum – LF Otal – 3B Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – SS Mireles – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Gaytan

Wally Leggett came off the DL for Indy and came close to an RBI double with Torres on base the first time up, but Corral caught his liner in right-center on the run and ended the top of the second inning. The Indians took the lead in the third, when Victor Perez – who allowed no runners in the first two innings – smacked a leadoff double to left and then scored on a wild pitch and Hilario’s groundout, which was truly Hilario-us. (suckles on bottle of Capt’n Coma)

Gaytan bunted into a double play when Flowe drew a walk in the bottom 3rd, and Yocum’s leadoff single in the fourth once again didn’t lead to ******* anything. The Indians had only two base hits through five, but the Coons had only ONE. Hilario, who was constantly on base again, hit a soft single to begin the sixth and stole second base, his 25th theft on the season, but when Matt Rogers hit another soft single to put runners on the corners and then got himself caught stealing by Flowe, Gaytan stranded Hilario on third by ringing up Alex Gomez. Instead, the bottom of the order did Gaytan in for good, as Leggett doubled home both Valadez and Cabrera in the seventh and Gaytan was lifted after Perez bunted Leggett to second base for the second out. McMahan struck out Hilario to get to the stretch.

Wharton hit a single in the seventh and was left on, and Mireles hit a single in the eighth and was doubled up by Corral. Unlike DeWitt, Perez was not allowed to go the distance with a save on the table, and Ryan Croft, a southpaw the Indians had acquired just days earlier from the Buffos, who had a 1.42 ERA in 30 games in the Federal League, entered to see the 9-1-2 batters. Fumero pinch-hit to lead off, and flew out to right. Yocum singled, but was forced out on an Otal grounder, and Katz grounded out to end the game. 3-0 Indians. Yocum 2-4;

******* **************.

Game 4
IND: CF Hilario – LF Spicer – 1B M. Rogers – C A. Gomez – RF T. Torres – SS J. Robinson – 3B Valadez – 2B Leggett – P Jo. Flores
POR: 2B Fumero – LF Otal – SS Katzman – CF T. Wharton – 1B Morejon – 3B Murcia – RF Corral – C Flowe – P Rios

The Raccoons went up 2-0 in the second inning on Sunday – after 20 scoreless innings – when Wharton opened with a single and scored on a Murcia single; a throwing error by Torres gave Murcia an extra base that allowed Flowe to drive him home with two outs before the inning ended with Rios, who struck out five for no base runners the first time through the Indians’ order. Hilario disputed a full-count strikeout in the fourth inning and retreated to the dugout just before the umpire would have run him, and Spicer and Rogers also went down. The Coons began the bottom 4th with Morejon singling and Murcia hitting a double to left-center, and had a pair in scoring position with nobody out. Corral’s groundout scored a run, but when Flowe lifted one out to Torres in medium-depth center and Murcia went home, he was thrown out at the dish.

Rios then ran not only three full counts to begin the fifth inning, but all three also reached base as Gomez walked, Torres doubled, and Jamel Robinson walked. Great. Valadez popped out to Otal in shallow left, but Leggett had no mercy with his former teammate and slapped home two runs with a single to left-center. Flores bunted the go-ahead run to second base – the tying run (Robinson) was already on third – put Otal pulled down Hilario’s fly to left to keep them stranded. But don’t you worry about the Indians; they flipped the score easily enough with a Spicer single and Gomez’ homer in the sixth.

Rios struck out nine through seven complete innings, but still left on the hook because the ******* Coons already left another pair on base in the bottom 6th, and another one in the seventh when Yocum drew a 1-out walk in Rios’ spot, was forced out on Fumero’s grounder, Otal singled, but Katzman popped out and left them on the ******* corners. In the eighth, Morejon doubled off Willie Castellanos with one gone to put the tying run back on the menu, but, facing Tim Tennant, Murcia grounded out and Corral flew out to left. Torres hit a solo homer off Nava for an insurance run in the ninth, and van Otterdijk hit another bloody double with one out in the bottom of the inning against the left-handed Croft. Fumero’s single to left brought that runner home, but of course we were now still behind by one. A bad pickoff attempt by Croft sent Fumero and the tying run to second base, but Otal whiffed. Katz was batting with two outs, and hobbled a ball through between Leggett and Robinson and over the second base bag TO FINALLY GET THE ******* TYING RUN HOME. Wharton singled, moving Katz to second, and Morejon slapped another single and this time Katz scored. Walkoff! 6-5 Critters. T. Wharton 3-5; Morejon 3-5, 2B, RBI; Murcia 2-3, BB, 2B, RBI; van Otterdijk (PH) 1-1, 2B;

In other news

July 1 – Thunder 2B/SS Jose Palominos (.310, 15 HR, 49 RBI) hits for the cycle in a 7-2 win over the Canadiens. The 27-year-old gets the four hits in the first four at-bats and rives in two runs before striking out in his final at-bat.
July 1 – Warriors OF Jordan Lopez (.335, 3 HR, 29 RBI) will miss most of July with torn ankle ligaments.
July 2 – The Condors beat the Titans in 17 innings, 4-3. The top three spots in the Titans lineup go 0-for-18 with five walks and no runs scored.
July 3 – A groin strain puts ATL C Justin Hart (.323, 14 HR, 71 RBI) on the DL for at least two months.
July 4 – MIL RF/LF Carlos Dominguez (.370, 8 HR, 57 RBI) scorches the Titans for five hits, two doubles, and four RBI in the Loggers’ 12-inning, 5-3 win in Boston.
July 4 – ATL OF Jorge Soto (.357, 3 HR, 20 RBI) also works overtime to collect five hits, including three doubles, and three RBI in a 7-6 win against the Bayhawks that takes 11 innings to nail down.
July 4 – Vancouver acquires 2B Andy Ratliff (.326, 1 HR, 25 RBI) from the Capitals for MR Miguel Batista (1-0, 4.74 ERA, 1 SV) and the #8 prospect, SP Alex Tabares.
July 5 – VAN SP Ricardo Montoya (8-5, 3.12 ERA) hits the DL; the 40-year-old is expected to miss two months with an oblique strain.
July 6 – Crusaders OF Willie Ospina (.291, 1 HR, 9 RBI) could be out for another month or more with a strained ACL.

Player of the Week (FL): DEN 1B Juan Gutierrez (.341, 15 HR, 55 RBI), hitting .500 (15-30) with 1 HR, 7 RBI
Player of the Week (CL): MIL RF/LF Carlos Dominguez (.370, 8 RH, 60 RBI), slapping .469 (15-32) with 10 RBI

FL Hitter of the Month: DEN OF Chris Tuck (.358, 9 HR, 38 RBI), hitting .330 with 7 HR, 19 RBI
CL Hitter of the Month: MIL C Manuel Rodriguez (.315, 14 HR, 60 RBI), bashing .376 with 6 HR, 28 RBI
FL Pitcher of the Month: DAL CL Jerry Washington (6-0, 1.74 ERA, 20 SV), saving 9 games and going 4-0 with a 1.46 ERA, 13 K
CL Pitcher of the Month: IND SP Jorge Flores (8-6, 3.29 ERA), going 4-1 with a 1.54 ERA, 20 K
FL Rookie of the Month: LAP INF Larry Thomas (.247, 4 HR, 41 RBI), batting .283 with 3 HR, 21 RBI
CL Rookie of the Month: VAN 1B Hector Moreno (.253, 6 HR, 28 RBI), slapping .354 with 3 HR, 18 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Tee-hee, silly Elks. Trading a top 10 prospect for nothing. (looks at the cover of the Agitator screaming “TEAM HAS NO PRESENT NOR FUTURE”) Sigh.

The Raccoons fired hitting coach Jonathan Flores on Saturday. He had been in his third year of overseeing this disaster. We got THAT lineup (at least that top half of a lineup) and they’re scoring under four runs a game. Inacceptable.

Speaking of the top half of the lineup; Steve Humphries had been expected back in late August, but it turns out he suffered a setback and would not be back before September, and then would probably finish the AAA season rehabbing and only play two or three more weeks with this useless team.

Crusaders and Elks for seven games next week, then the All Star charade (sounds like he doesn’t expect any All Stars in brown), and we’ll be on the road for ten games after that.

Fun Fact: The Raccoons are about to find out whether you can sign international free agents with neither budget nor cash.

So far this July we have signed a Venezuelan kiddo that wants to be a catcher, but would be better served at first base (there’s *some* power potential) for $27k, and then peppered $500k into 16-year-old Dominican right-hander Humberto Molina, who claimed to have a six-pitch mix with no duds. We’d find out about that. We were also after another starting pitcher, who was already approaching $1M. Jose Espino would blow us well over the soft cap, and cost (so far) at least another $500k in tax that we don’t actually have.

Espino, another 16-year-old Dominican right-hander, was said to be the real ****; OSA gave him a 19 in stuff potential, and his stamina was great! He was throwing 93 at a tender 16 years old, with lots of room on the upside. Espino was in constant trouble at school because he was spending all his free time on workouts and hanging around older players, and none on his homework.

Well, I got a diploma, and look how far I got with calculus and all that other ****.

Oh well, let the league come and try to take the wallet of a guy that’s not wearing any pants. (clanks bottles with Slappy while sharing a nod)