Portland Raccoons (ABL)

[Westheim]

Raccoons (57-86) vs. Loggers (67-77) – September 10-12, 2052

The Loggers had just swept the Coons in Milwaukee and I had little confidence in a change of fortunes, and we’d lose the season series – now 9-6 in favor of the Loggers – for the first time in almost a decade. They sat third in runs scored, bottoms in runs allowed, but it wasn’t like the latter fact had helped us much a week and a half ago…

Projected matchups:
Rafael de la Cruz (9-11, 3.15 ERA) vs. Angelo Munoz (14-9, 2.85 ERA)
Seisaku Taki (13-7, 2.67 ERA) vs. Josh Costello (10-12, 4.53 ERA)
Phil Baker (3-1, 4.94 ERA) vs. Noah Hollis (11-11, 3.84 ERA)

Still only right-handers coming here. Also, Zach Suggs was back in their lineup, with all 29 homers of his.

Game 1
MIL: 3B K. Leon – 2B R. Lopez – SS Z. Suggs – C C. Thomas – CF Steinbacher – 1B Haracz – LF de Lemos – RF Sayre – P A. Munoz
POR: SS Lavorano – CF Perez – 2B Waters – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – C Raczka – CF Thomason – 3B Crispin – P de la Cruz

Rafael de la Cruz continued his pursuit of 100 walks this season, offering free passes to Kenny Leon and Zach Suggs in the first inning, plus a wild pitch in between and a sac fly to Chris Thomas. Phil Steinbacher hit a sharp single before Dale Haracz grounded out to Waters. Pitch economy was never something that worked its way into Raffy’s game on this cold Tuesday, and neither was a rally for the Coons. Craig Sayre singled in the fifth, then scored on Ricky Lopez’ double to right to make it 2-0, while the Raccoons were offered leadoff walks in the fourth and fifth innings for Waters and Raczka, respectively, but either hit into a double play (Oscar Rivera), or engorged themselves on silly pops to keep the runner on first base. When Fernando Perez actually hit a home run in the bottom of the sixth to shorten the score to 2-1, it came as a bit of a shock to anybody watching. The Coons’ pen had no lead to blow here, so they nibbled together three scoreless innings after Raffy left past six innings, with Snyder, Crisler, Reese, Johns, and Saldivar all chipping in. The Coons put the tying run on base to begin the bottom 9th when Matt Waters singled off Noel Groh right away. Groh then nailed Ken Crum, and Oscar Rivera shoved a single through the left side, loading them up with zero outs. Oh boy. Mitch Sivertson batted for Raczka to keep down on the double plays and hit another grounder through the left side in the groove just carved by Rivera’s, tying the game at two. Nick Thomason grounded sharply to second base, with Crum thrown out at home by Ricky Lopez for the first out. Groh lost Crispin on balls then, and also the game. 3-2 Critters. Sivertson (PH) 1-1, RBI;

Change of pitcher for Wednesday: John Morrill (4-8, 5.54 ERA) got the ball for Milwaukee.

Game 2
MIL: LF Pigman – 2B R. Lopez – SS Z. Suggs – C C. Thomas – CF Steinbacher – 1B Haracz – 3B K. Leon – RF C. Lowe – P Morrill
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – LF Perez – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – CF Suzuki – C Brewer – 3B Blackshire – P Taki

Taki had five straight no-decisions going into this game. He got a lead for himself or more likely others to blow in the bottom 1st when Fernando Perez singled and Ken Crum whacked an RBI double to left-center. Well, actually, Chris Thomas got him for a homer in the fourth inning to tie the game, but the Coons returned the favor in almost a copycat move from the first inning, but in the bottom of the fourth it was Perez who doubled, then scored on a single by Crum. Rivera walked, and then Suzuki uncorked a 3-run homer to gain some distance, 5-1.

It wasn’t a great start by Taki, but it was serviceable. He had some stretches with long counts, and ended up throwing 107 pitches in just seven innings, but he held the 5-1 score to the end of that, at least. Reese and Harmer put a scoreless eighth together before Jeff Fox walked Maldo and Brewer in the bottom 8th, but he also struck out Suzuki, Blackshire, and the useless pelt of Glodowski. The cocky Coons then picked the ninth inning from Victor Salcido – and with success…! 5-1 Raccoons. Perez 3-3, BB, 2B; Crum 2-4, 2B, 2 RBI; Taki 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, W (14-7) and 1-3;

Could we still get a tie with the Loggers for the year…!?

What lofty goals we have here.

Game 3
MIL: LF Pigman – 2B R. Lopez – SS Z. Suggs – C C. Thomas – CF Steinbacher – 1B Haracz – 3B K. Leon – RF C. Lowe – P Costello
POR: 2B Waters – SS Sivertson – CF Perez – 1B Crum – LF Rivera – C Brewer – 3B Crispin – RF Maldonado – P Baker

Costello plated Matt Waters with a wild pitch in the first inning, but the Loggers had already whacked a few hits off Baker in the first inning, and it got sublime in the second. The inning started with Steinbacher reaching on a Waters throwing error. Baker then walked Haracz and Leon, which was a thrill, and then Lowe grounded to Waters again. He tossed it away… *again*. The tying run came home, and the go-ahead run scored when Costello (!) drew a walk from Baker. Brilliant. Perry Pigman hit a sac fly to Perez, and Ricky Lopez singled home another run – that was the first ******* base hit for the Loggers in this inning, but the fourth ******* run. Suggs flew out, which didn’t change that everything around here ******* SUGGED, and promptly Chris Thomas singled in another run. The inning ended where it began, with Steinbacher grounding to Waters, who didn’t dare toss another one away, lest he’d get traded to Moldova.

The real stunner was that the 5-1 deficit lasted only ten minutes. Aaron Brewer homered to left to begin the bottom 2nd, after which Costello walked both Crispin and Maldo. Baker, who had allowed only one earned run, bunted them into scoring position, but it turned out they were in scoring position already for when Matt Waters romped a 3-piece outta the park in rightfield to tie the score at five. Another homer by Oscar Rivera then gave us a 6-5 lead in the bottom 3rd.

Baker held that score through five innings, which was all he had in the tank after the endless top 2nd and five walks offered in total. He did not get the W, because the Coons then tried to get cute and get two innings from Dave Saldivar. They got one-and-a-third, and game-tying doubles by Lopez and Thomas in the top 7th. Larson replaced him, but gave up a 2-out RBI single to Kenny Leon, who was hitting all of .195 even with that single, after an intentional walk to Haracz to get the lefty stick with actual threat in it out of the way. Lowe then grounded out to strand a pair. The L didn’t stick, though, since the Raccoons countered with Waters and Sivertson going to the corners in the bottom 7th, and with nobody out. Perez’ sac fly got as even at seven. Crum walked, moving Sivertson to second base, and Rivera doubled over the glove of Pigman, driving Sivertson across home plate to grab an 8-7 edge. Lonzo batted for Brewer, but lined out to short, and the inning fizzled out from there. Larson and Lillis handled that one well in the eighth, handing it over to Hitchcock in the ninth inning, but Zach Suggs wonked his 30th homer to left to tie the game, and Chris Thomas and Aaron Coen turned it all the way around with a pair of doubles…

One more comeback? Perez hit a leadoff single off Groh in the bottom 9th, but Crum lined out to short. Rivera grounded up the middle; Suggs intercepted the ball on the dive, but had no play by the time he rescrambled all his limbs, and the Coons had the winning run on base. Glodowski and Crispin then both hit identical sad flies to Chris Lowe to kill the game. 9-8 Loggers. Waters 3-5, HR, 2B, 3 RBI; Sivertson 2-5; Perez 2-4, RBI; Rivera 3-5, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; Suzuki (PH) 1-1;

The Loggers…!

Raccoons (59-87) vs. Knights (85-60) – September 13-15, 2052

Somehow, the season series with the Knights was even, despite them leading the CL South by two games over the Thunder. They really needed more W’s against the Raccoons. Overall they were second in runs scored and seventh in runs allowed in the league. Their rotation was spongey for a first-place team, with a 4.34 ERA against them, ninth in the league.

Projected matchups:
Jason Wheatley (5-8, 4.19 ERA) vs. Brian Jackson (13-7, 5.06 ERA)
Cameron Argenziano (0-6, 4.50 ERA) vs. Joe Byrd (16-7, 3.72 ERA)
Rafael de la Cruz (9-11, 3.15 ERA) vs. Kodai Koga (10-14, 4.49 ERA)

Jackson was the only southpaw coming up this week.

Game 1
ATL: 2B S. Turner – SS W. Acosta – CF Alade – 1B J. Rogers – C Almaguer – LF Kirkwood – RF Royer – 3B Thibault – P B. Jackson
POR: SS Lavorano – 3B Sivertson – 2B Waters – 1B Crum – LF Rivera – RF Glodowski – C Brewer – CF Thomason – P Wheatley

The Knights put three runs on Wheats (two earned) in the second inning, where they opened with straight singles by Pedro Almaguer, Chris Kirkwood, and Steve Royer. Kirkwood reached only after Brewer had dropped a foul pop for an error, which later led to the unearned runs. Their markers scored on a sac fly by Steve Royer, and singles by Willie Acosta and Jon Alade with two outs. Wheats had no luck, and sometimes bad luck added itself to that… It was a bad start for Wheatley even without that giant cockup, as the Knights wrung him out for 106 pitches in five innings, even though they didn’t get any other runs. Eight hits, three walks, and a lot of yuck. The Coons? Two hits through five – better don’t ask for details.

The Knights added another 3-spot on Ryan Harmer in the sixth inning, getting a leadoff walk drawn by Sam Turner, three singles, and three stolen bases along with those three runs. Bottom 6th, the Coons stunningly loaded the bases with three leadoff singles by Adam Samples (was he still on the roster??), Lonzo, and Sivertson. Waters drove in a run in the worst way, with a 4-6-3 double play. Ken Crum singled home Lonzo, but the inning ended with Rivera and the Coons still behind by a slam. Interestingly enough, the Coons put the same three batters – Samples, Lonzo, and Sivertson – on base AGAIN to begin the bottom 8th; this time Samples got nailed, but the other two singles again, and now Waters was up as the tying run. And struck out. Crum hit a fly to deep left, but it was caught by Kirkwood, holding him to a sac fly. Maldo batted for Crisler in what had been Rivera’s spot, but was nicked to fill the bags again. And kudos to the Knights for sticking with Brian Jackson STILL – even against Glodowski, who knew little but how to slap southpaws (and was 0-for-3 in the game). He, too, flew out to Kirkwood. Useless pelt!! Salcido pitched another throwaway inning, while the Knights’ David Hardaway drew three left-handed pinch-hitters in the bottom 9th, and retired the whole lot of them. 6-3 Knights. Lavorano 2-4; Sivertson 3-4, 2B; Crum 2-3, 2 RBI; Samples (PH) 1-1;

(groans)

Game 2
ATL: CF Royer – SS W. Acosta – RF Alade – 1B J. Rogers – LF Kirkwood – C Almaguer – 2B S. Turner – 3B Housey – P J. Byrd
POR: SS Lavorano – CF Perez – 1B Crum – LF Rivera – C Raczka – RF Maldonado – 3B Crispin – 2B Blackshire – P Argenziano

Despite the threat of both rain and Winless Argenziano, the promise of bobbleheads for a pitcher that wasn’t gonna pitch, and if he pitched didn’t even pitch in the same league anymore, drew just over 15,000 brave souls to the Saturday game. Argenziano was whacked for three singles every which way in the first few innings, but Steve Royer was caught stealing and Almaguer hit into a double play to keep the Knights off the board early, and even though Argenziano also bunted into a double play in the bottom 2nd, he was up 2-0 by then. Maldo had gotten nicked once more, and Ed Crispin avenged the bruised old man with a homer to left.

Somehow, Argenziano remained unscored upon despite steady traffic on the bases. But Jay Rogers found another double play to hit into in the fourth, and when Matt Housey and Joe Byrd looked like they’d surely set up the winning rally with a pair of 2-out singles (…) in the fifth inning, and Steve Royer lobbed a 1-2 pitch to left for another single, Housey was sent on the reputation of Rivera as a bad fielder, but was still thrown out at home plate to end the inning. Of course Rivera was a bad fielder – but that ball was right in front of him, and at least his arm still worked…! Perez homered in the bottom of the inning, 3-0, and Argenziano kept playing with matches around a first-place lineup, walking Willie Acosta and Jon Alade in the sixth inning – and then Kirkwood hit into an inning-curtailing double play.

By the seventh it rained, and Almaguer homered to left to shorten the score to 3-1. Housey singled, and Argenziano was yanked when he walked THE ******* OPPOSING PITCHER with one out. The Coons sent Lillis. Royer struck out, but Acosta walked in a full count, loading them up for Jon Alade, hitting .305 with 18 homers, but from the left side, so we might still be – ah, Jesus H. Christ! A single to left, Rivera with a slight bobble, two runs scored, and Argenziano remained a winless loser. Right-hander Shawn Woods pinch-hit for Rogers, but struck out when we brought Justin Johns in a double switch that exchanged Maldo for Thomason in right. Johns and Hitchcock held the Knights in check for the rest of regulation, with Hardaway in for a 3-3 tie in the bottom 9th. Waters hit a pinch-hit single in the new pitcher’s spot, but that was it, and the game went to extras, which was too much misery for at least a quarter of paying customers, who took their David Barel bobbleheads and left, even though a pitching assignment for Mike Snyder promised a reasonably quick end to the proceedings.

But Snyder actually turned out two scoreless. It was raining for the second time in the game when Tyler Philipps whacked a 2-out double in the bottom 11th, but Waters grounded out to short to keep the affair going. Eric Reese walked Bobby Thibault and gave up a single to Alade in the 12th, but Blackshire – now at third base – handled a 2-out spanker by Jushiro Wada for the third out of the inning. Gustavo Chapa retired the Coons in order in the bottom 12th, after which the ball went to Salcido, who got wished the best of luck. Notably, by the top 13th the Knights were out of pinch-hitters (the Coons had three left) and Chapa grounded out when his spot came up as Salcido turned the Knights away 1-2-3. Lonzo then singled to right off Chapa to begin the bottom of the frame, and wasted no time scooping second by force and taking third on a Perez fly to center. The Knights wanted none of Ken Crum and put him on first intentionally, pulling up an 0-for-4 Oscar Rivera instead, but he also drew a walk. Philipps was prime double play territory, but we only needed a fly ball, and he could certainly hit those. He struck out, which at least brought up Matt Waters. He poked at the first pitch, grounded out short, and the game went on. I calmly began to stack the 9,000+ leftover bobbleheads into a leaning tower, hoping to eventually get smothered as it collapsed.

Because the game had been so much fun until here, we then got a rain delay in the 14th inning that ended Salcido’s outing after just five outs when he had to sit around for over an hour. Samples and Larson entered in a double switch, with the pitcher now in Rivera’s #4 hole. Larson put Acosta and Wada on in the 15th inning. They were in scoring position with two outs … but Leandro Ramos was up, a reliever, and they were out of pinch-hitters…! …and Ramos singled to center, plating two, on an 0-1 pitch. I spontaneously collapsed into my bobblehead tower instead, but the tying runs reached in the bottom of the inning. Ramos plunked Perez, and Crum singled, all with one out. Sivertson batted for Larson, but grounded out, advancing the runners. Ramos and Phillips – the last bat on the bench would be Brewer – then went through the motions for an at-bat that saw the count run full, and just when I only wanted the damn game to end, Philipps sloshed a grounder through between Housey and Acosta, and sent the tying runs dancing across home plate. All even at five! Let’s play another ten innings…!! (giggles madly) Waters flew out to left to extend the game.

The Coons were close to running out of pitchers at this point as well, with Ryan Harmer starting the 16th on the hill. Crisler and Saldivar were the only relievers left, and the latter had been out two days in a row. Royer singled but Harmer rung up three in the inning, and one more in the 17th, where Eduardo Avila singled, but was left on by Leonardo Ramos this time. Ramos was in his fourth inning in the 17th, grounded out Lonzo, and then was lifted for Kyle Conner, who got rid of Perez and Crum. Harmer went three scoreless before Brewer batted for him to begin the bottom 18th, singling to left-center against Conner. Philipps then shanked a double to left, moving the winning run to third base…! Unsurprisingly the Knights turned down the offer to get beaten by Matt Waters, with Samples, Blackshire, and Thomason coming up, a trio batting 15-for-71 with 1 HR and 5 RBI, all chipped in by Samples, who popped out. Dave Blackshire? Popped out. OH FOR ALL THAT IS HOLY! When Conner fell 3-0 behind Thomason, I scrambled for the blunderbuss. If you twitch one whisker…!!! Thomason didn’t twitch a whisker, took ball four, and after 6:26 the remaining seven fans in the ballpark could go home. 6-5 Blighters. Crum 2-6, 2 BB; Brewer (PH) 1-1; Philipps 3-4, 2 2B, 2 RBI; Synder 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K; Harmer 3.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 4 K, W (1-1);

First career win for Ryan Har--- (dozes off)

So, how was the pen for Sunday? Not *great*. Raul Medrano was ordered to Portland on Sunday morning, arriving just ahead of game. He had made one long relief outing for us earlier in the year. He was well rested, and could give multiple innings if necessary.

Just don’t play 18 again, you bums.

Game 3
ATL: 2B S. Turner – SS W. Acosta – CF Alade – 1B J. Rogers – RF Worden – C Cass – LF Royer – 3B Thibault – P Koga
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – CF Perez – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – LF Sivertson – C Brewer – 3B Crispin – P de la Cruz

With only one pair of player positions switched in those teams’ lineups, we were surely in for another treat in the rubber game. The Coons scored early on, getting a run from Crum, Rivera, and Crispin base hits in the second inning, and then another one when Waters and Lonzo reached, did the double steal on the Knights, and scored on a sac fly and another Crum single, 3-0. De la Cruz was his usual wasteful self with pitches, needing almost 80 through five innings, despite not having that many base runners (seven, six earned), and when the Knights were on base, they hit into double plays twice. Royer was on in the fifth, stole a base, and scored on a sac fly by Koga to get Atlanta on the board and shorten the lead to 3-1 then. Same inning, Lonzo singled and swiped his 60th base, but was stranded, although the faithful rose and gently applauded the youngster for his third straight season of 60+ bags.

Raffy offered a leadoff walk in a full count to Alade in the sixth inning, but the run never got off first base on stingy defense, with Matt Worden grounding to second and taking out Lonzo to break up a double play, but both survived the entanglement. The Knights made up a run in the seventh on a pair of triples (!) by Royer and Sam Turner, but Acosta grounded out to keep the score at 3-2, which was also the end for Raffy after 103 pitches. Ken Crum countered with an RBI triple of his own in the same inning, driving home Waters with two outs to regain a 2-run lead, with Koga then drilling Rivera, who tossed his bat and snarled towards the mound, but the umpire got in front of him and managed to walk him to first base without a fracas breaking out. Boys, please behave, won’t you think of the children!? Sivertson penalized Koga by sneaking an RBI single past Sam Turner, 5-2, before Brewer grounded out to end the inning.

Lillis and Crisler then made their best attempt to croak in the eighth. Lillis walked Jay Rogers, then gave up yet another triple to Worden, 5-3. Crisler conceded that run too on a Tyler Cass single, but at least still got out of the eighth with a lead. Kevin Hitchcock made no fuss in the ninth, getting Woods on a grounder, and then the 1-2 batters with strikeouts. 5-4 Raccoons. Waters 2-5; Crum 3-4, 3B, 2B, 2 RBI; de la Cruz 7.0 IP, 7 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 4 K, W (10-11);

In other news

September 10 – Another hitting streak, with RIC INF Landon Guillory (.239, 3 HR, 18 RBI) up to 20 straight games of hitting with an eighth-inning single in a 4-2 win over the Buffaloes.
September 10 – SFB SP Mario de Anda (8-7, 3.83 ERA) is shut down for the season with shoulder inflammation.
September 11 – Both hitting streaks in the league end on Wednesday. The Titans dry up VAN SS/3B Dan Mullen (.328, 3 HR, 69 RBI) after 31 games of hitting, while also beating the Canadiens, 6-4; and Richmond’s Landon Guillory (.238, 3 HR, 19 RBI) is held to a sac fly for the only Rebs run in a 7-1 loss to the Buffaloes, but no base hits as well.
September 12 – The Crusaders fall to the Indians in 9-0 fashion, and especially to a 1-hit shutout by IND SP Tan Brink (16-9, 2.77 ERA). The only base hit for New York, a single, is chipped in by their starting pitcher, Austin Guastella (5-13, 5.37 ERA).

FL Player of the Week: LAP RF Matt Diskin (.383, 14 HR, 52 RBI), whacking .517 (15-29) with 1 HR, 6 RBI
CL Player of the Week: IND LF/RF/1B Bill Quinteros (.319, 18 HR, 88 RBI), spanking .407 (11-27) with 3 HR, 10 RBI

Complaints and stuff

So we probably won’t lose 100, although I wouldn’t put a 13-game losing streak to finish the year beneath these guys. A 4-2 week sure soiled our draft position a bit; we’re now up for the #3 pick, half a game ahead of the Condors and 2 1/2 ahead of the melting Rebs. The Baybirds are 3 1/2 to the good of us with the #4 pick and nobody else is *really* in range anymore.

Not much else to say as we’re playing out the string, although we’re preparing an offer that the Warriors won’t be able to refuse. (looks over to the desk, where Maud, Slappy, Cristiano, and Chad are all congregated to repaint the leftover David Barel bobbleheads in Warriors colors)

Next week: final home series against the Thunder, then the start of the last road trip to Indy, Elk City, and Boston.

Fun Fact: Ed Crispin’s game-winning walk drawn on Tuesday marked the 6,400th regular season win for the Raccoons.

It went to Dave Saldivar, who retired but Chris Thomas in the top of the ninth inning to get the payout from the reversal of fortunes in the bottom of the ninth inning.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (61-88) vs. Thunder (85-63) – September 16-18, 2052

The Thunder had looked on with interest while the Knights had stumbled over the Coons on the weekend, which got Oklahoma to within a game of the CL South lead – and that with the Raccoons out of the playoff picture. For once, the pennant was possible for them! They were up 4-2 on the Critters this year, and had the #1 offense and the fifth-fewest runs allowed in the CL.

Projected matchups:
Seisaku Taki (14-7, 2.62 ERA) vs. Mike Zeigler (10-9, 3.72 ERA)
Phil Baker (3-1, 4.40 ERA) vs. Ben Lehman (7-2, 4.59 ERA)
Jason Wheatley (5-9, 4.11 ERA) vs. Zach Boyer (12-5, 4.01 ERA)

Zeigler was the only left-handed starter for the Thunder.

Game 1
OCT: LF R. Cox – 2B Ban – SS Soberanes – 1B Worthington – C S. Suggs – 3B R. Sifuentes – CF M. Allen – RF Benavides – P Zeigler
POR: SS Lavorano – 3B Sivertson – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Glodowski – C Brewer – 1B Maldonado – CF Thomason – P Taki

Sean Suggs was hitting .301 since leaving Portland, because why wouldn’t he, but killed the first inning with a double play grounder when the Thunder already had a run on the board through Jonathan Ban’s double and a single by Ed Soberanes, after which Taki had walked David Worthington. That was a popular recipe to get lit up by the Thunder – but guys on base rather indiscriminately… Suggs made up for the early failure with a go-ahead home run in the fourth inning, which sugged, and put the Thunder ahead 2-1. The Coons had made up the deficit in the second inning on a walk drawn by Crum, a Glodowski hit, and ultimately a run-scoring wild pitch… Crum and Glodowski found a way on base again in the bottom 4th, then with Crum getting nicked and Glodowski finding another hit with a single into left. Aaron Brewer added another single, loading the bases, all with two outs, before Zeigler walked in the tying run against Maldo. Worse (for him) yet, Nick Thomason bashed a bases-clearing triple over the head of Mike Allen to mark a 5-2 lead for the Critters.

…which the Thunder almost made up in the sixth inning, whacking four hits for two runs off Taki. Ramon Sifuentes and Juan Benavides drove in Soberanes and Worthington to get back to within a run of the home team. Johns, Snyder, and Reese collected six outs from there without accident to get through eight, but at the same time Felix Alvarez pitched three innings of shutdown long relief for the Thunder, so the Raccoons weren’t getting away with the game, either. Hitchcock appeared for the fourth time in five days, and looked off from the start. He walked Jesus Adames, pinch-hitting in the #8 spot, to get going. Luke Burnham popped out, Ryan Cox whiffed, but Jonathan Ban reached on an infield single with two outs. Oh, why, just why… Soberanes was up, batting .300 with 25 homers, and he hit a scorcher – right at Lonzo, who snatched the ball for the final out. 5-4 Raccoons. Glodowski 2-3, 2B;

We were not only out-hit in this game, we were out-hit by more than 2:1, with 11 hits for Oklahoma and just a pawful for the Coons. No idea how that amounted for a win…

Game 2
OCT: LF R. Cox – 2B Ban – SS Soberanes – 1B Worthington – C S. Suggs – 3B R. Sifuentes – CF M. Allen – RF Benavides – P Lehman
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – LF Perez – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – CF Suzuki – 3B Crispin – C Raczka – P Baker

Baker faced seven in the first two innings, retired six on poor grounders or infield pops, and looked like he might go a while in this game. No idea what happened between innings then, but he must have been exchanged for lookalike impostor Doofus Mc********* after that, because the third inning was beyond belief. Juan Benavides opened with a single to center. Baker then misfielded Lehman’s bunt to second base, late, and everybody was safe. Cox grounded into a fielder’s choice, but Jonathan Ban singled home a run, and when Soberanes hit a comebacker, Baker tried his luck at second base again, but this time through the ball behind Lonzo’s back for an error and another run for Oklahoma, 2-0. Worthington and Suggs mercifully grounded out when I fully expected at least one of them to hit a 7-run homer. Baker only lasted five innings, the last three of them messy, although the Thunder failed to score any more runs on him, or on Dave Saldivar, who loaded the bags in the sixth with a walk, a single, and hitting Cox’ thumb with a hammer, although Ban then grounded out to strand a full set, while Cox was replaced with Fernando Bonilla. The Raccoons tried to get three innings from Saldivar, but got only two and two thirds and a homer by Mike Allen. Snyder and Medrano finished the game out after that. 3-0 Thunder. Crum 2-3, BB, 2B;

You may have noticed that no specifics about the Raccoons’ offensive attempts were dissected in the above recapitulation of the game. But I had to promise my priest to speak less ill of imbeciles.

Game 3
OCT: LF R. Cox – 2B Ban – SS Soberanes – 1B Worthington – C S. Suggs – 3B R. Sifuentes – CF M. Allen – RF Benavides – P Boyer
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – LF Perez – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – C Brewer – CF Suzuki – 3B Blackshire – P Wheatley

There were still three starts left for Wheatley, who was 17.1 innings short of reaching 162 for the year thanks to the injury start. Not that he was gonna finish highly on any rate list – but just getting there after all was something like damage control for everybody involved at this point.

The first hit Wheatley was involved with was a single of his own in the bottom 3rd, which sent Mikio Suzuki to third base with one out and opened the door for Matt Waters to plough through and straight into a 4-6-3 double play, keeping the game scoreless. The Coons scored in the fourth, though, when with two outs Crum singled, Rivera walked, and Aaron Brewer grounded lazily to the right side. Boyer intercepted the ball ahead of Suggs, and threw it wildly past Worthington for a run-scoring, 2-base error before angrily striking out Suzuki. Mike Allen broke up Wheatley’s no-hitter with a 2-out single in the fifth before it could become a real thing, then threw away a pickoff attempt with Ban on second and two outs the inning after, but still got out Soberanes on the next pitch, maintaining the 1-0 lead.

Boyer walked the first three batters in the bottom 6th, which made for two on, one out, since Lonzo was caught stealing before Perez and Crum arrived, and then Rivera rumbled into a double play. Back-to-back hits by Soberanes and Worthington took the lead away in the seventh after all, but Wheats clawed and scratched his way through eight innings, trying to regain it – in vain, so far. His spot led off the bottom 8th, with Crispin bravely grounding out in his spot. Waters singled through the right side with two Gold Glovers, though, and then got an early start on Perez’ 2-out hit up the leftfield line. Perez went for the double, while Waters went for home, and a bobble on the relay meant he arrived safely to give Wheatley a posthumous 2-1 lead…. which the Coons then gave to Brett ******* Lillis jr. with a lefty-leaning bottom of the order and Hitchcock being overworked. The Thunder responded with righty pinch-hitters, but Luke Burnham came closest leading off the inning with a long fly to right that was caught by Rivera. The Thunder went down in order. 2-1 Raccoons. Wheatley 8.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 5 K, W (6-9) and 1-2;

100 losses? Avoided!

Tah!

Raccoons (63-89) @ Indians (83-69) – September 20-22, 2052

Off to the road then for the last ten games, three of which would be at the North’s second-place team. The Indians were still within reach of the postseason, and had the Coons in a 12-3 chokehold for the year. They needed the wins, and they wanted the wins…! They were sixth in runs scored, and third in runs allowed. They were also still without Chaz Kokel and Chase Clover.

Projected matchups:
Cameron Argenziano (0-6, 4.48 ERA) vs. Steve Miles (10-5, 3.44 ERA)
Rafael de la Cruz (10-11, 3.13 ERA) vs. Bill Nichol (7-5, 3.93 ERA)
Seisaku Taki (15-7, 2.72 ERA) vs. Enrique Ortiz (16-8, 2.54 ERA)

Only right-handed pitchers coming up here for the Arrowheads.

Game 1
POR: SS Lavorano – LF Perez – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – C Brewer – 3B Crispin – CF Thomason – 2B Blackshire – P Argenziano
IND: CF A. Mendez – SS de Castro – RF B. Quinteros – 3B B. Anderson – C Poindexter – LF S. King – 1B Lovell – 2B A. Rios – P S. Miles

Lonzo was caught stealing again in the first, but put the first run on the board in the third inning when he hit a sac fly to left to bring in Dave Blackshire, who had opened the inning with a double to left. Fernando Perez’ homer then immediately extended the lead to 2-0, but of course there wasn’t a lead on Earth that Cameron Argenziano couldn’t get rid off. Winless Boy offered leadoff walks in the bottom 3rd and 4th innings, conceding the former runner on his own throwing error, and then gave up a leadoff single to Alex de Castro in the fifth, with that tying run doubled home with a sharp howler to left off the bat of Bobby Anderson.

A Crum triple and Rivera single gave the Coons a new lead in the sixth inning, 3-2, and somehow Argenziano didn’t blow that one in his final inning, despite another leadoff hit for Pat Lovell and a Lonzo error. De Castro flew out to end the inning. The Coons then actually tacked on a pair; Thomason and Blackshire reached to begin the seventh as Miles faltered for good. Suzuki’s sac fly and Perez’ single each brought home one of the runners, 5-2, and it looked like the maiden win for Winless Boy might actually materialize this time.

And then came Paul Crisler and cluelessly loaded the bases in the bottom 8th. Scott King singled. Antonio Rios singled sharply. Josh Hare drew a walk in the #9 hole. One out and the top of the order, with left-hander Dan Allen pinch-hitting and getting matched with – since Lillis had done the seventh – Reese. Allen promptly hit a duck snort to Rivera’s feet, Rivera bobbled it briefly, and two runs scored, 5-4. De Castro grounded into a fielder’s choice and Bill Quinteros struck out to strand runners on the corners, though. AND we’d have Hitchcock, AND we had Dave Blackshire peppering his first career homer off Heath Turner in the ninth inning…! The bottom 9th was quick and efficient, and Argenziano actually got his first big league win in his 2584384th attempt. 6-4 Coons. Lavorano 3-4, RBI; Perez 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Blackshire 3-4, HR, 2 2B, RBI;

Yes, we’re pointlessly dawdling away the #1 pick AND helping the damn Elks to the division.

Game 2
POR: 2B Waters – CF Perez – 1B Crum – LF Rivera – SS Sivertson – C Philipps – 3B Crispin – RF Maldonado – P de la Cruz
IND: LF R. White – CF A. Mendez – 1B B. Quinteros – 3B B. Anderson – C Poindexter – RF S. King – 2B A. Rios – SS de Castro – P En. Ortiz

The first three Coons reached (Waters on an error), and the next three made outs, plating one (Waters on a groundout) for an early 1-0 lead. The first three were on *again* in the second inning for Portland with Crispin walking, Maldo singling, and de la Cruz reaching when Ortiz took his bunt to third base – late. Waters plated one run – on a de Castro error. Perez singled home two, and Crum singled home another run … but Perez was thrown out at home plate. Everything was a bit of a mess. Rivera grounded out, but then Ortiz walked the bags full and gave up a 397-footer to Ed Crispin – GRAAAAAAAAND SLAAAAAAAAAMMMM!!!

Maldo then doubled off Wook-jin Kym replacing the fallen Ortiz – who had been second in ERA in the CL – but also finally had his old man body give out and limped off the field with Dr. Padilla in short order. Glodowski replaced him and was stranded by Raffy, but it was 9-0, with six runs on Ortiz being unearned. Raffy meanwhile turned a 9-run lead into a masterclass in inefficiency, throwing almost 80 pitches through five innings while bleeding four runs, including a pair on a Quinteros homer in the fifth. The Coons in between tacked on a pair on back-to-back RBI doubles for Rivera and Sivertson, so through five we were at a wonky 11-4 score. Raffy got five more outs, then walked Rusty White in the bottom 7th and was yanked. Harmer and Salcido pitched the game to conclusion. 11-4 Raccoons. Perez 2-4, BB, 2B, 2 RBI; Crum 2-5, RBI; Rivera 2-5, 2 2B, RBI; Crispin 1-3, 2 BB, HR, 4 RBI; Maldonado 2-2, 2B; Glodowski 2-3, 2B; Samples (PH) 1-1;

Game 3
POR: SS Lavorano – LF Perez – 2B Waters – RF Rivera – CF Thomason – 3B Blackshire – C Raczka – 1B Samples – P Taki
IND: 2B A. Rios – LF Hare – 1B B. Quinteros – 3B B. Anderson – C Poindexter – CF Locke – RF Lovell – SS Ed. Ortiz – P Brink

Tan Brink (16-10, 2.90 ERA) was supposed to stop the bleeding, but gave up a triple to Lonzo and an RBI single to Perez to begin the Sunday game as the Indians’ postseason bid continued to unravel. But the Coons soon strung up zeroes on the board – for the next three innings their only base runner was Perez with another single – and Taki took a tumble in the bottom of the fourth. Leadoff walks to Josh Hare and Bill Quinteros were bad enough, even though the Indians then made two weak outs, a groundout for Anderson and a pop for Manny Poindexter. But Philip Locke singled over Waters with two outs and Rivera completely bulldozed that play into not only the tying, but also the go-ahead run with a capital flub of the baseball.

Brink responded with two nicked Coons – Taki and Lonzo – and a walk to Perez, but Waters struck out and Rivera grounded out to keep all of them stranded in the top of the fifth. Instead, Edwin Ortiz hit a leadoff double, and Antonio Rios singled to center. Ortiz made for home, and here was another terrible throw from the outfield, this time Thomason, and the run scored. Oh hold on, I think Thomason’s arm just came off. (sigh!) He left the game with Dr. Padilla as well, and Suzuki took over his spot. Jim Larson and Dave Saldivar gave up another run in the seventh inning to fall 4-1 behind, but then Brink offered leadoff singles to the 2-3-4 batters in the eighth inning, packing the bags with Critters and zero outs. Suzuki floated out to Hare in shallow left. Ken Crum batted for Blackshire … and wobbled into a 6-4-3 inning-ending double play. Heath Turner retired Brewer, Samples, and Glodowski in order in the ninth inning to salvage one game for Indy. 4-1 Indians. Perez 3-4, RBI;

In other news

September 16 – The Gold Sox beat the Cyclones, 7-2, to clinch the FL West for the year.
September 19 – NYC OF Matt Ward (.182, 2 HR, 2 RBI) hits a home run for the only marker in a 1-0 win over the Aces.
September 19 – The Falcons win a rain-shortened game from the Thunder, 2-0 with only seven innings completed. CHA SP Tyler Weems (6-3, 3.39 ERA) gets credit for a 1-hit shutout. Only OCT C Jesus Adames (.299, 10 HR, 62 RBI) lands a single off him.
September 20 – Tijuana OF Dustin Ransford (.276, 3 HR, 37 RBI) is out for the year with a partially torn labrum.
September 21 – A homer, two doubles, two singles, and four RBI are the total damage Atlanta’s Chris Kirkwood (.285, 23 HR, 88 RBI) does to the Thunder in a pivotal 11-2 rout.
September 22 – The Falcons suffer a capital ninth-inning meltdown, giving up 10 runs to the Condors on their way to a 12-7 loss.

FL Player of the Week: DEN 1B Chris Rice (.385, 6 HR, 17 RBI), batting .615 (8-13) with 5 HR, 11 RBI
CL Player of the Week: LVA UT Jim White (.266, 4 HR, 86 RBI), hitting .458 (11-24) with 1 HR, 5 RBI

Complaints and stuff

While we tripped up the Indians, the Loggers took two of three from the damn Elks, so on the weekend the lead in the North didn’t budge. The damn Elks are still two games ahead of the Indians. Oh I wish the boys could win a few games in Elk City next week, but alas…

Maldo made it *almost* all the way to the finish line of his final season in Portland – I hope nobody was expecting an extension. (Maldo coughs in the background) Dr. Padilla hasn’t said anything yet, and it’s hard to find a specific injury in legs beaten up that bad, but I don’t expect him to take the field again.

Also out is Nick Thomason with a strained hamstring. The Coons will thus probably add another outfielder for the final week.

Fun Fact: Sunday was the 5,900th regular season defeat for the Raccoons, and it also clinched our first 90-loss season since 2032.

Against 6,407 wins.

Also, there is something with years ending in 2. The Coons lost 94 games in that wretched 2032 season. Before that, the prior 90-loss campaign is 2022, with 91 losses.

There’s something with years ending in 2 here…!

[Westheim]

Raccoons (65-90) @ Canadiens (86-69) – September 23-26, 2052

Would the Raccoons stumble the damn Elks or race for the #1 pick again? The upcoming four-game set would probably give answers to that. The damn Elks were seventh in runs scored, second in runs allowed, and had a 9-5 edge on the Critters this year. The Coons were there, and I was back in Portland on the trusty brown couch, with a couple of bottles of booze and a big bowl of cheese. Nothing on top of that. Just cheese. And strangely, at ease.

Projected matchups:
Phil Baker (3-2, 4.01 ERA) vs. Hyuma Hitomi (7-11, 4.02 ERA)
Jason Wheatley (6-9, 3.95 ERA) vs. Federico Purificao (9-11, 3.44 ERA)
Cameron Argenziano (1-6, 4.25 ERA) vs. Terry Herman (12-10, 3.71 ERA)
Rafael de la Cruz (11-11, 3.20 ERA) vs. Juan Ramos (9-6, 3.44 ERA)

Nothing but right-handers.

The Coons shipped Nick Thomason to the DL, and Jesus Maldonado was in Elk City, but unlikely to play. Jerry Outram would definitely not play, so there was no final old-man showdown between two batters that had surely left a mark on the CL North in the last 15 years. To make up for the missing Thomason and/or Maldo, the Raccoons added another AAA outfielder, OF Prospero Tenazes, who had batted .253 with seven homers in his age 25 season in AAA and was not a very bright prospect by any stretch of the imagination anymore.

Game 1
POR: SS Lavorano – LF Perez – 2B Waters – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – 3B Crispin – C Philipps – CF Samples – P Baker
VAN: 3B A. Soto – RF J. Shaw – SS Mullen – CF D. Moreno – 1B Wheeler – LF T. Turner – 2B Sostre – C Julio Diaz – P Hitomi

Lonzo opened the week with a double and scored on a Waters single, but Ken Crum found a double play to keep the Coons to one run in the first inning. The Elks were not that shy; they knocked the cover off the baseball – and also off Phil Baker’s neck in the second inning. Doubles by Jeff Wheeler and Bill Sostre, and singles by Julio Diaz, Alex Soto, and Joshua Shaw plated a total of four runs, easily enough to go in front. They would add a fifth run in the fifth inning, Baker’s last, with Damian Moreno’s single, stolen base, and another RBI single from Wheeler. The Coons were also very successful in their times at-bat – IF their goal was to get back to the hotel as quickly as possible. And who could blame them? (points at TV) Just look at the dump they have for a ballpark up there!

(creaking noise outside, then a loud rumble and shattering) What is it, Maud? The bottom line of the scoreboard came loose and crashed into the seats below? – Ah, it’s fine. Slappy will clean that later. Besides, we weren’t using the bottom line anyway.

Come the top 6th, the Coons’ 2-3-4-5 batters then all slapped consecutive 2-out singles, Rivera driving home a pair. Crispin walked to fill the bags again, but Tyler Philipps struck out, keeping three on, and the team as a whole two runs short. Mike Snyder and Dave Saldivar pitched scoreless garbage time baseball, but after their 4-hit outburst in the sixth the Raccoons reverted to trash and only reached base once more afterwards when Lonzo singled and stole his 61st base of the season in the seventh inning. He was duly stranded. 5-3 Canadiens. Lavorano 2-4, 2B; Waters 2-4, RBI; Crum 3-4; Saldivar 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

Nobody below Oscar Rivera had a base hit in the game. Crispin and Philipps each drew a walk, and the rest of collectively crap.

This game ended the Titans’ mathematical postseason chances. Also over: Maldo’s career – a broken thumb sent him to the DL for the remainder of the year and that would probably be that. At least he went out with a double!

Game 2
POR: SS Lavorano – LF Perez – 2B Waters – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – 3B Sivertson – CF Suzuki – C Raczka – P Wheatley
VAN: 3B A. Soto – RF J. Shaw – SS Mullen – CF D. Moreno – 1B Wheeler – LF T. Turner – 2B Nicholson – C Julio Diaz – P Purificao

The Elks starter got purified with a 3-run first inning, central to which was Ken Crum, who singled home a pair and scored on Sivertson’s 2-out single. The Elks made up the deficit without making an out, however. Alex Soto singled, Joshua Shaw walked, and Mullen, Moreno, and Jeff Wheeler all added a hit in what was dawning to be a brief outing for Wheatley. Turner reached on Wheats’ error, making it all worse, because now we were at three on and nobody out yet again. Brian Nicholson and Julio Diaz scored more runs with a groundout and sac fly, respectively, and because I wasn’t weeping enough already, Purificao added a 2-out RBI single. Six runs, four earned. Smothered.

Wheats batted for himself in the second, singled, and scored on a 2-out double by Matt Waters, but Shaw and Mullen reached again in the bottom 2nd, were doubled home by Wheeler, and that was that. And THEN a rain delay.

While play resumed eventually an hour later, despite me being emotionally done with both baseball and life itself, and Purificao remained in the game after the rain delay, he still didn’t get the W, because the Raccoons got rid of him before the fifth inning was over. Raczka hit a sac fly to score Sivertson in the third, and a Ken Crum homer ended his day in the fifth, then with the Coons down 8-6. The bullpens then prevented any scoring; Raul Medrano on one side and Jared Bramel on the other each pitched three scoreless innings in this game, and the Coons forfeited the game for good in the bottom 8th when Brett Lillis jr. ran into another stupid 2-spot as Dan Mullen hit a 2-out double to right to chase home Diaz and Kyle Hawkins. Against Bernardino Risso, who had already closed Monday’s game, in the ninth inning, the Coons got the tying run to the plate, but that was only with a Mullen error already included. Samples, Lonzo, and Waters were on with two outs to wait for good things from Ken Crum, who flew out to Tim Turner on a 2-1 pitch. 10-6 Canadiens. Perez 2-5; Waters 2-4, BB, 2 2B, RBI; Crum 2-5, HR, 3 RBI; Samples (PH) 1-1; Medrano 3.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 2 K;

(stares gloomily)

The Indians split a double-header with the Titans, falling three games behind, which was terrible and terrifying, because by winning out this set, the Elks could clinch the division while we were still in town, and I’d then have to throw myself off the nearest bridge over the Willamette.

Unrelated, we had clinched last place already (so, first ever first-to-last for the franchise…), but were still nowhere near the #1 pick, two games ahead of the Condors and three ahead of the Rebs. We were three games to the good compared to the Baybirds and the #4 pick.

Game 3
POR: SS Lavorano – LF Perez – 2B Waters – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – CF Suzuki – C Raczka – 3B Blackshire – P Argenziano
VAN: 3B Nicholson – C L. Miranda – 1B Wheeler – CF D. Moreno – SS Mullen – LF Escobido – RF T. Turner – 2B Sostre – P Herman

Argenziano walked three and gave up a run on Dan Mullen’s sac fly in the bottom 1st, which made me sigh quite loudly. Nobody got a base hit in the game until Jeff Wheeler singled Luis Miranda from first to third base in the bottom 3rd. Argenziano plated that run with a wild pitch, then walked Damian Moreno as if to make up for it. Before the Coons could yank him, though, Mullen shot a liner past him to Lonzo for a fielder’s choice, but Argenziano had reached for it, but suffered an abdominal strain on the attempt. (blows) Jim Larson replaced him, got Angel Escobido out, and then the Coons also found the H column when Fernando Perez doubled to left in the fourth inning. Perez, too, left the game with a balky back, replaced by Prospero Tenazes, who was left on base by Waters and Crum.

Through six, the damn Elks had one base hit – the Wheeler RBI single – but led 2-0 against the Coons and three scattered hits and the odd double play hit into… Victor Salcido had pitched two scoreless in garbage relief already when in the top 8th his turn came up with Brewer and Blackshire in scoring position and no outs after a walk and a double to begin the inning against Herman. Since we wanted to have him pitch more innings to get the season over with, he batted for himself … and singled home the tying runs with a bouncer through the left side. Then Lonzo popped out, Tenazes singled, and Waters hit into another double play.

Salcido however pitched four scoreless, which was enough to get the lame Critters to extra innings. Tyler Philipps singled in his place in the 10th inning, and Tenazes singled as well with two outs, but Waters lined out to Wheeler to kill another effort, and Wheeler also killed the rest of the team with a walkoff single off Lillis in the bottom of the same inning, plating Jose Uranga and his leadoff double. 3-2 Canadiens. Sivertson (PH) 1-1; Philipps (PH) 1-1; Salcido 4.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 3 K and 1-1, 2 RBI;

(blows)

The stupid Arrowheads bent over backwards to lose another one to the Titans, so the ******* Elks’ magic number was now one.

Fernando Perez was day-to-day and not in the lineup on Thursday. Argenziano was also listed as day-to-day, but wouldn’t have made another appearance anyway.

Game 4
POR: SS Lavorano – CF Suzuki – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – 2B Sivertson – 3B Crispin – C Raczka – LF Tenazes – P de la Cruz
VAN: 3B A. Soto – RF J. Shaw – SS Mullen – CF D. Moreno – 1B Wheeler – LF T. Turner – 2B Nicholson – C Julio Diaz – P Ju. Ramos

An Alex Soto error amongst hits for Suzuki and Crum allowed the Coons to scratch out an unearned run in the top of the first, but Raffy decided to crank the decrepitness up to eleven for his final outing of the year. He filled the bases with Shaw and Mullen singles and a Moreno walk, then gave up three runs from there. Tim Turner singled home a pair, and two more walks forced home a run by the time Julio Diaz was done looking at **** off the plate. Juan Ramos struck out, but the damage was done. Jeff Raczka homered to open the top 2nd, 3-2, but Diaz singled home another run in the third inning after Raffy had walked Turner and Brian Nicholson…

Sometimes it was just tough to keep loving them…….

Raffy reached the fifth, but walked Wheeler and Turner in full counts before getting shafted with seven free passes in this game, and 99 for the season. Ryan Harmer took over and ached out of the inning without giving up any more runs. The Elks steadily worked themselves towards clinching, especially with Ramos not letting a runner on base from the fourth through the sixth inning. Suzuki hit a single in the seventh, but was forced out by Crum, and then Rivera hit into a double play. ******. Simply ******. Eric Reese then continued the reliever parade for the Coons in the bottom 8th. He retired nobody. Diaz doubled. Hawkins singled. Escobido singled. Shaw singled. Crisler replaced him, got two outs, then gave up the remaining two runners on a Wheeler single. And then a homer to Tim Turner. The pink plebeians celebrated their division title starting in this ******* inning, which, by the way, was not over yet. Jim Larson had to ring up Nicholson to get out of it. The clincher was made official when Bill McMichael ended a 1-2-3 ninth with a K to the pinch-hitter Aaron Brewer. 10-2 Canadiens. Suzuki 2-4; Crum 3-4;

(struggles to breathe)

Raccoons (65-94) @ Titans (82-77) – September 27-29, 2052

Bottoms in runs scored, tops in runs allowed. Up 9-6 on the Coons this year. Someone please shoot me.

Projected matchups:
Seisaku Taki (15-8, 2.76 ERA) vs. Jamie Guidry (9-16, 4.35 ERA)
Phil Baker (3-3, 4.66 ERA) vs. Victor Scott (15-10, 2.41 ERA)
Jason Wheatley (6-10, 4.25 ERA) vs. David Barnes (8-6, 4.32 ERA)

We might get three southpaws here. As if it matters. This team could lose to right-handers, left-handers, even guys with no ******* arms at all…

Game 1
POR: SS Lavorano – 3B Sivertson – 2B Waters – LF Rivera – RF Glodowski – C Brewer – 1B Philipps – CF Samples – P Taki
BOS: SS A. Montes de Oca – C R. Gonzalez – LF E. Cobb – 1B L. Rodriguez – CF T. Lopez – 2B Thatcher – 3B Lettner – RF L. Estrada – P Guidry

The ERA title was no longer in play for Taki, which was the main reason why I only sighed and shrugged when he gave up a leadoff triple to Leo Estrada and balked the runner across before even Guidry could make an out in the third inning. That erased the Coons’ 1-0 lead garnered from doubles whacked by Philipps and Samples in the second inning. The Coons would hit back-to-back doubles again between Glodowski, the useless pelt, and Brewer in the sixth inning, but then Waters and Rivera were also on base ahead of them and the Critters scratched out three runs in total for a new 4-1 lead. Sivertson and Waters reached base with one out in the seventh inning, but then Rivera and Glodowski made poor outs and left them stranded. Waters made a throwing error to put Larry Rodriguez on base to begin the home half of the inning, but also snatched Jason Lettner’s liner to end the inning, so there was that.

The Coons added on by the eighth, with 2-out RBI knocks for Lonzo and Sivertson, including a triple for the former, off right-hander Sam Heisler. Unfazed, Taki reached the ninth inning with some breathing room to complete the game. Eric Cobb and Tony Lopez both strung doubles into gaps to make up a late run, but Ian Davison and Lettner grounded out easily and Taki completed the game on 107 pitches. 6-2 Coons. Lavorano 2-5, 3B, RBI; Sivertson 3-5, RBI; Waters 3-5; Perez (PH) 1-1, 2B; Philipps 2-2, 2 BB, 2B; Taki 9.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, W (16-8);

Barnes was moved ahead of Scott for Saturday. But that still made for a southpaw on the hill.

Game 2
POR: SS Lavorano – 3B Sivertson – 2B Waters – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – LF Perez – C Brewer – CF Samples – P Baker
BOS: SS A. Montes de Oca – C R. Gonzalez – 1B L. Rodriguez – CF T. Lopez – 3B Bumpus – 2B M. Martinez – LF Whitlow – RF L. Estrada – P D. Barnes

Single, double, single, double – the #3 through #6 batter went to work on Barnes in the first inning, with Crum, Rivera, and Perez each driving home the guy ahead of them. Then Baker gave up a leadoff walk to Angel Montes de Oca and a homer to Larry Rodriguez right away, and Ruben Gonzalez singled home Leo Estrada, who also drew a leadoff walk, to tie the game an inning later. Oh well, at least we tried.

Lonzo tried, too, stealing bases, but was thrown out in both of his attempts in the game, including in the top 1st before everybody else got all the hits. He didn’t go when he reached on a Rodriguez error to begin the fifth inning, then was forced out at second when Sivertson slapped one back to Barnes. Then Sivertson was caught stealing.

All that random sucking was neat and all, but things got even more depressing in the bottom of the sixth. Adam Bumpus opened with a soft single, and Miguel Martinez reached on another infield single when Baker over-ambitiously threw to second base. Eric Whitlow grounded to Sivertson, who fired the ball wildly over Crum for a 2-base error and a 4-3 lead for the Titans. Baker was yanked for Reese, who for once didn’t **** up completely, struck out Estrada, popped up Barnes, and then yielded for Johns before he could run **** outta luck, with Johns getting Montes de Oca on an easy fly to Rivera – if there was such a thing as an easy fly to Rivera. Samples sampled a leadoff single to right in the seventh, then was doubled up by pinch-hitting Dave Blackshire, and the game lingered on until Mike Snyder got hold of a baseball in the bottom 8th and sponsored another blowout with two walks, a Dave Gonzalez single, and a Ruben Gonzalez homer to left for four more Boston runs. 8-3 Titans. Lavorano 2-4; Waters 2-4; Perez 2-4, 2B, RBI;

One more. Then I can go to sleep.

Game 3
POR: SS Lavorano – LF Perez – 2B Waters – 1B Crum – RF Rivera – C Philipps – 3B Blackshire – CF Tenazes – P Wheatley
BOS: SS A. Montes de Oca – C R. Gonzalez – 1B L. Rodriguez – CF T. Lopez – 2B Thatcher – 3B Bumpus – LF S. Lewis – RF L. Estrada – P V. Scott

Again, a barrage of hits in the first; Perez doubled and scored on a Waters single, while Crum’s single to left and a walk drawn by Rivera loaded the bases for Tyler Philipps, who like Blackshire behind him made a poor out to short and nobody else scored. Wheats walked Montes de Oca, threw a wild pitch, and was taken deep by Rodriguez, bunted into a force of Tenazes at second, and threw a fastball into a howling Steve Lewis’ groin in the bottom 2nd, so it was a bit of a mixed day again for him for sure. He also smashed Tony Lopez with a fastball in the third and was generally all over the place, but also struck out six batters total the first two times through the Titans lineup.

The scrubs then loaded the bases with nobody out in the sixth inning as Philipps, Blackshire, and Tenazes all reached on a walk and two singles, and nobody out. Since we didn’t care anymore, Wheats batted for himself, and got himself off the hook with a sac fly to right. That was all for runs; Lonzo singled to left, but Blackshire was thrown out at the plate by Lewis, and Perez popped out. The Coons only took a lead when Crum and Rivera were on base in the seventh, and mixed-up signals led to a double steal attempt. Ruben Gonzalez was just as confused as me, threw the ball past Bumpus and Crum scored with the go-ahead run. Philipps then got Rivera home with a sac fly, 4-2. Wheats’ season ended with precisely 162 innings pitched when he struck out Montes de Oca to begin the bottom 8th on his 118th pitch. The Coons went to Larson, who walked Rodriguez with two outs, but got a groundout from Lopez to end the inning. Hitchcock whiffed John Thatcher. Bumpus flew out to Perez in left. And Steve Lewis ended the season with a 3-1 grounder to Lonzo. 4-2 Coons. Perez 2-5, 2B; Crum 2-3, BB; Rivera 2-3, BB; Philipps 1-2, BB, RBI; Tenazes 2-4; Wheatley 7.1 IP, 3 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 7 K, W (7-10);

In other news

September 24 – The Buffaloes clinch the FL East with a 7-1 win over the Blue Sox. It is their first playoff appearance in 12 years.
September 24 – SFW INF/CF Nick DeMarco (.223, 6 HR, 38 RBI) ends his season early after suffering a hip muscle strain.
September 25 – SFW SP David Barel (14-8, 2.44 ERA) goes eight and two thirds innings with a no-hitter against the Scorpions before giving up a double to Nate Culp (.266, 25 HR, 65 RBI). SFW MR Alex Mancilla (5-4, 4.81 ERA, 3 SV) gives up a home run to Jamie Harmon (.262, 29 HR, 83 RBI) before the Warriors’ closer, Ben Lussier (4-13, 4.54 ERA, 35 SV) restores order and saves the 4-2 game.
September 26 – NYC CL Ryan Sullivan (5-5, 3.55 ERA, 31 SV) will spend the winter recuperating from a torn back muscle.
September 28 – NYC SP Jim White (9-6, 3.39 ERA) throws a 2-hit shutout against the Canadiens to claim a 7-0 win.
September 29 – Rebels 2B/SS Lance Harrison (.293, 20 HR, 69 RBI) knocks his 20th homer of the year for the only run in a 1-0 Closing Day win over the Cyclones.
September 30 – The Knights maul the Thunder in a tie-breaker game, dishing out a dozen runs after falling behind in the first inning for a 12-2 victory and a playoff spot. ATL 3B Bobby Thibault (.255, 11 HR, 55 RBI) and ATL SP Brian Jackson (16-7, 4.91 ERA), who pitches a complete-game 8-hitter, both drive in three runs in the game.

Complaints and stuff

Seisaku Taki must be something – if you can finish 16-8 on THIS team, imagine what he could do on a GOOD team…!

Lonzo won the stolen base title for the third time in three full seasons, and that is about it for merits on the team. Come November, almost everybody will be available, except for standout personnel well under team control, like, y’know, Lonzo and Taki. I’d also add Raffy (grumble grumble) and Pucks to the list. The rest of the roster just has a price.

Thankfully, I don’t have to make any more remarks about who the Coons will play next week.

Fun Fact: Their inspiring 13-13 September was the Raccoons’ best month in 2052.

Not one winning moon. Lots of work to do in the winter. The next three winters, probably…

[Westheim]

2052 ABL PLAYOFFS

The 76th ABL playoffs contained – shock! – four teams that had each won their division, as was good custom in this league.

The 91-71 Canadiens headed the CL North by four games and offered more of a pitching approach to winning. They were in the top three in ERA for both their starters and their bullpen, with the best defense behind all that, but had only scored the sixth-most runs. They got on base well, but lacked either power or speed, failing to break a hundred in either category. Besides sophomore Damian Moreno (.284, 16 HR, 87 RBI) nobody on the team broke into double-digit homers. But they offered a balanced lineup and a very stingy bullpen behind a rotation that was solid, although it lacked a real ace. Juan Ramos (10-6, 3.31 ERA) offered the best ERA on the staff, while Jeff Wheeler (.313, 7 HR, 73 RBI) and Dan Mullen (.323, 3 HR, 80 RBI) were hitting well over .300. The team missed a couple of relievers on the DL as well as elder statesman Jerry Outram, age 38 and locked away on the DL.

The Knights made the playoffs in a tie-breaker against the Thunder and finished 95-68 in the CL South. They did so with the second-most runs and surprisingly creaky pitching for a playoff team, finishing eighth in runs scored with the fourth-worst rotation. Home runs were not an issue on the team, with Chris Kirkwood (.294, 24 HR, 99 RBI) holding the team lead in both power and RBI. Jon Alade (.301, 19 HR, 80 RBI) was the only .300 hitter, but in total there were four batters with 10+ dingers. Defense was not an issue – the Knights came second to the Elks in that category. But while the pen had a very sturdy back end, the middle innings could turn out to be a problem if the Knights’ starters failed to go far – and going far was not exactly what they were renowned for. Joe Byrd (17-7, 3.70 ERA) led them by ERA and wins, and the next-best ERA on that playoff roster was that of Sam Geren (12-10, 4.07 ERA), who didn’t even figure to be in the rotation. Leo Villacorta was the only notable injury for the Knights, who had a very left-handed middle of the order, which looked like it could do some damage against the all-righty Canadiens rotation.

Over in the FL East, the 91-71 Buffaloes broke a playoff drought by finishing six games ahead of the spending Miners, doing so while finishing third in runs scored and second in runs allowed. This was a very solid team, finishing top three in most major categories except batting average (sixth) and stolen bases (ninth). Kennedy Adkins (17-8, 2.82 ERA) was a young-ish ace to build a rotation around, and the bullpen was solid throughout. Power was supplied amply by Tony Aparicio (.299, 22 HR, 104 RBI) and four more double-digit dinger drivers, although there was the odd crack in the construction. The bottom of the order was shallow even without major injuries (although Felix Marquez entered the playoffs day-to-day), and behind Adkins you hit the 4+ ERAs in the rotation really quickly.

Opposite the likable Buffos were the three-times-defending champions, the 104-58 Gold Sox, who had crushed their division with the most runs scored, fewest runs allowed, and excellence from top to bottom. Gary Perrone (17-5, 2.42 ERA) led the staff, and ivan Villa (.305, 41 HR, 144 RBI) murdered baseballs and pitchers’ souls with glee. Raul Sevilla (.294, 23 HR, 101 RBI) and Sandy Castillo (.335, 16 HR, 97 RBI) were no joke in the middle of that lineup, either, and with a +218 run differential, the Sox looked to be stomping again. – Alas, injuries. Rick Price, Bill Ramires, and Roberto Sanchez were all out, as was reliever Willie Maldonado, but the lineup had suffered the most and the bottom of the order was filled with replacements that were hitting rather pedestrian numbers. So even though the worst ERA in their rotation (3.77 on Jim Cushing) would easily qualify for second on two other playoff rosters, there were a few flies in the ointment and things wouldn’t happen by themselves even with a balanced lineup with three switch-hitters to constantly hit from the correct side.

The Canadiens made their 14th playoff appearance, most amongst the field. The Buffaloes made their 12th October, the Gold Sox their 11th, and the Knights only their ninth.

In terms of titles, of course, the Gold Sox topped the class with five (including three in a row and counting). The Canadiens had three, while the Buffaloes and Knights (next to the Miners) were two of three teams to never hoist the trophy. Wouldn’t THAT be a World Series…??

Alas, to make it happen, the Buffaloes had to upset the Gold Sox, who had seven playoff appearances in nine years, all well within the 12 years it had taken the Buffaloes to return to the postseason at all. They had met in the CLCS once before, in 2003, when the Gold Sox went on to win the pennant and the World Series, too.

The Canadiens had seven playoff appearances since 2038, combining with the Raccoons to claim 14 of the last 16 CL North titles, but their last title had come in 2038, and they had gone out in four of the other six CLCS. The Knights had a single playoff “run” in the last 38 years (2040), when they had lost the World Series to the Wolves. Then, they had beaten the Canadiens in the CLCS, and in fact, meeting the Canadiens in the CLCS was the only way for the Knights to win a pennant. This had also happened in 1986, so they were 2-0 against Vancouver in the CLCS, and 0-6 against everybody else.

While public opinion favored a Knights-Buffos series, thus, the experts very much did not. The expected Gold Sox-Canadiens World Series would be a rematch of 2049, won by Denver, of course, and that was the only combination of these four playoff teams that had occurred before.

+++

2052 CLCS

VAN @ ATL … 3-6 … (Knights lead 1-0) … VAN Jeff Wheeler 2-4, BB, RBI; ATL Sam Turner 4-4, BB; ATL Jon Alade 3-4, HR, 5 RBI; ATL Danny Arroyo 2-2;

VAN @ ATL … 5-1 … (series tied 1-1) … VAN Jeff Wheeler 3-4, BB, 2 2B, RBI; VAN Damian Moreno 2-5, 2 RBI; VAN Dan Mullen 3-5, 2B; VAN Juan Ramos 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 2 K, W (1-0);
TOP @ DEN … 2-3 … (Gold Sox lead 1-0) … DEN Ivan Villa 2-4, HR, 3 RBI;

TOP @ DEN … 2-0 … (series tied 1-1) … TOP Felix Marquez 2-4, BB, HR, RBI;

ATL @ VAN … 10-4 … (Knights lead 2-1) … ATL Tyler Cass 2-5, 4 RBI; ATL Matt Worden 3-4, HR, 2 RBI; ATL Chris Kirkwood 2-4, HR, 3 RBI; VAN Jeff Wheeler 2-3, BB, HR, RBI;

ATL @ VAN … 6-8 … (series tied 2-2) … ATL Sam Turner 2-4, BB, HR, 3 RBI; ATL Jon Alade 2-3, 2 BB; VAN Angel Escobido 2-2, 2 BB, HR, 4 RBI; VAN Damian Moreno 2-3, BB, 3B, 3 RBI;
DEN @ TOP … 8-2 … (Gold Sox lead 2-1) … DEN Ryan Thompson 2-5, 2 RBI; DEN Ivan Villa 3-5, HR, RBI; DEN Raul Sevilla 2-4, HR, 3 RBI; TOP Dave Lee 2-4, 2 HR, 2 RBI;

A bases-clearing triple for Moreno and a grand slam for Escobido, all off Brian Jackson (0-1, 13.50 ERA) are probably what counts as “decisive” in the CLCS Game 4.

ATL @ VAN … 3-4 … (Canadiens lead 3-2) …
DEN @ TOP … 2-3 … (series tied 2-2) … TOP Tony Aparicio 4-4, 2B, RBI;

In Vancouver, not a single player manages more than one hit in the game, but the home team still squeezes out a pivotal win.

DEN @ TOP … 6-4 … (Gold Sox lead 3-2) … DEN Vic Ayres 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; DEN Raul Sevilla 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; DEN Blake Mickle 2-4, HR, 2 RBI;

VAN @ ATL … 4-8 … (series tied 3-3) … VAN Tim Turner 2-4, 2 2B, RBI; ATL Sam Turner 2-3, 2 BB, 2B, RBI; ATL Jon Alade 3-4, BB, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; ATL Matt Worden 2-4, HR, 2 RBI;

VAN @ ATL … 3-15 … (Knights win 4-3) … VAN Julio Diaz 2-3, 2 BB, HR, 2B, RBI; ATL Sam Turner 2-5, HR, 2 RBI; ATL Jon Alade 4-5, HR, 2B, RBI; ATL Chris Kirkwood 4-5, 2 2B, 5 RBI; ATL Bobby Thibault 3-4, BB, 3B, 2B, 2 RBI;
TOP @ DEN … 4-10 … (Gold Sox win 4-2) … TOP Matt McLaren 3-5, 2 RBI; TOP Tony Aparicio 2-5, 2 RBI; DEN Sandy Castillo 3-3, 2 BB, HR, 2B, 3 RBI; DEN Raul Sevilla 3-5, 2B, RBI; DEN Dave Hils 2.2 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K, W (1-0);

It takes six innings before the CLCS finale turns into a rout, but when it does, the Atlanta ballpark turns into a madhouse. Kodai Koga (2-0, 3.50 ERA) goes the distance with a 9-hitter, while Mario Godinez (0-2, 19.50 ERA) and the Canadiens bullpen suffer repeated explosions and end their playoff bid in a rout.

Dave Hils wins the pennant clincher for the Gold Sox in long relief after starter Kellen Lanning fails to go five innings against the Buffaloes.

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2052 WORLD SERIES

The two higher seeds converged in the World Series, where the Gold Sox remained odds-on favorites despite some offensive hiccups early in the FLCS. But they still had all their batters together – at least those that hadn’t already been on the DL – and in fact neither team had suffered any more injuries in the LCS. But nobody seriously expected the Knights’ rotation, fourth from the bottom in the CL, to keep up with the best offense in the entire country.

Four in a row – which would tie the record put up by the 2022-25 Titans – were predicted for the Gold Sox.

+++

ATL @ DEN … 11-7 (12) … (Knights lead 1-0) … ATL Sam Turner 2-5, 2 BB, 2 2B, 2 RBI; ATL Jushiro Wada (PH) 2-2; ATL Chris Kirkwood 2-3, 2B, RBI; DEN Ivan Villa 3-5, 2B;

Truth be told, neither starter does too well in the World Series opener, although Esteban Duran (0-1, 3.79 ERA) outlasts the Sox’ Jim Cushing (1-0, 6.00 ERA) before the Knights pen gives the lead away. No home runs, either. The Knights put up four in the 12th without even an extra-base hit, hitting four singles around two defensive mishaps by the Sox.

ATL @ DEN … 0-8 (series tied 1-1) … ATL Sam Turner 3-5; DEN Sandy Castillo 3-5, HR, RBI; DEN Raul Sevilla 2-3, BB, 2 2B, 2 RBI; DEN Kyle Brown 2-3, BB, 2 RBI; DEN Gary Perrone 7.0 IP, 6 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 7 K, W (3-0);

DEN @ ATL … 4-2 … (Gold Sox lead 2-1) … DEN Kyle Brown 4-4, 2 2B, 2 RBI; ATL Jay Rogers 2-4, RBI;

Injury replacement Kyle Brown, a 30-year-old quad-A veteran that hit .232 in the regular season, has a hand all of Denver’s runs in Game 3, and is now hitting .313 in October.

DEN @ ATL … 3-5 … (series tied 2-2) … DEN Ivan Villa 2-3, BB, HR, RBI; ATL Sam Turner 3-5, 3B; ATL Jon Alade 4-5, HR, 2B, 3 RBI; ATL Jushiro Wada (PH) 1-1, RBI;

DEN @ ATL … 5-4 (10) … (Gold Sox lead 3-2) … DEN Ivan Villa 3-5; DEN Thomas Gould (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI; ATL Jon Alade 2-5, 3 RBI;

36-year-old switch-hitting pinch-hitter Thomas Gould (.286, 1 HR, 1 RBI), in his seventh at-bat of the playoffs, all off the bench, takes Leonardo Ramos (0-1, 6.23 ERA) deep to break a tie in the 10th inning, although this time the Sox pen blew a 4-1 lead in the last two innings.

ATL @ DEN … 5-7 … (Gold Sox win 4-2) … ATL Matt Housey 2-4, HR, 3 RBI; DEN Vic Ayres 2-3, BB, 2 2B, RBI; DEN Ivan Villa 2-5, HR, 5 RBI; DEN Kyle Brown 3-4; ATL Gary Perrone 8.0 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 9 K, W (4-0);

Matt Housey hits a 3-run homer off Jason Posey (0-0, 6.00 ERA, 1 SV) when the Knights are down to the final out before Mike Lynn (1-0, 0.00 ERA, 4 SV) quells the rising with a strikeout of Eduardo Avila (.286, 0 HR, 1 RBI). The Knights this time truly had their starter blown out; Joe Byrd (1-3, 7.99 ERA) is done after a fourth-inning grand slam by Ivan Villa (.353, 4 HR, 11 RBI), and the Knights’ hopes are pretty much done with him then, down 7-1.

One day, Atlanta. One day…

2052 WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS
Denver Gold Sox
(6th title)

[Westheim]

The Gold Sox won another championship, which made it four in a row, which technically eclipsed the Coons’ three in the decade prior, with two more pennants in that mix. We don’t really count the pennant from last year in that dynasty, because most of the roster was turned over in the two years in between.

Also, am I the only one to whom “the pennant from last year” just sounds wrong? Didn’t we just lose 90-and-a-million games? In terms of record, 2052 was the worst season since *2000* for this franchise.

Before we go into the grim problems still on paw as the 2052-53 offseason began, let’s briefly talk about a problem off our paws – not that he wouldn’t been anyway, but Jesus Maldonado saw the writing on the wall at the end of his 7-yr, $38.5M contract and retired. He batted .221 with four homers in partial duty (321 PA) during this season, it wasn’t pretty, and certainly not worth the money. Was the contract a complete failure? I wouldn’t say so, because at the start of it he was a major offensive force still. Year four saw him reduced to half a season for injuries, and in year five he still put up 1.2 WAR, but the power, speed, and defense were all gone. The last two years were a bit gruesome. Still beat R.J. DeWeese’s 7-yr, $23.1M deal from decades ago, though.

For his career, Maldo, a $466k signing out Venezuela over 22 years ago, batted .289/.350/.436 with 2,359 hits, 210 homers, 1,165 RBI, and 146 stolen bases. 122 OPS+. He was an All Star seven times, a World Series MVP once (funnily enough in the losing effort in ’37), and took three Platinum Sticks. He *might* have won a few Gold Gloves in his early seasons if he hadn’t been so multi-talented on defense, leading to him mostly playing rover and filling in here and there and everywhere; he logged 900+ defensive innings at FIVE different positions, three of them on the infield, and 4,500+ innings at three positions as diverse as first base, third base, and centerfield. He shifted around so much in the first half of his career, that he appeared at a particular position in 100+ games in a season only once in his 20s: centerfield in 2043, his age 29 season.

Somehow, he never led the league in ANYTHING. Well – anything normal people pay attention to. No batting titles, homer crowns, heck, doubles or stolen bases. No. He did lead the league in a few sneaky categories here and there, however. For example, twice he led the CL in total bases in 2043 and 2045. The former year he also led in extra-base hits (an impressive 74), and finished third in Player of the Year voting. Once, he led in intentional walks but that was in 2040 when the lineup wasn’t very thick behind the middle. And SIX times he led the CL in getting knocked, with as many as 26 hit-by-pitches in a year, and *291* for his career. Pitchers hurt him more often than he took them over the fence…!

He was something. We’ll miss him.

(sniff)

(cough)

Okay, cold business. Lots of that to be done. Now, the good news was, I think Nick Valdes had a stroke or something, or he’s mellowing in old age (he’s celebrated his 65th birthday what, ten times now?). Despite a rancid 67-win season, the Coons got a $1.5M budget *increase* for 2053, pumping them from $49.5M to $51M for the new year. That, and getting rid of Maldo’s bloated contract, was $7M windfall alone, and there was pi-times-thumb about $4M of budget space that would have been available anyway, but we yet had to take the chainsaw to the roster.

The Coons inched up from 12th to 11th with the new budget, but of course the rest of the league wasn’t exactly sleeping either.

Top 5: Gold Sox ($71M), Thunder ($69M), Miners ($64M), Canadiens ($62M), Stars and Buffaloes ($57M each) – these were the same five times as the last TWO years, plus the Buffos sneaking into a tie for fifth there.

Bottom 5: Falcons ($43M), Indians ($38.5M), Wolves ($35.5M), Aces ($34M), Loggers ($32.5M) – *also* the same five teams as the last two years running, although all five of them at least got budget increases for 2053.

The remaining CL North teams could be found in 7th (BOS, $55M), and t-8th (NYC, $54M).

The average budget for a team in the league rose to $50.08M, up $1.38M from last season, so we did not actually gain that much with our budget increase, compared to what everybody else was doing. The median team budget was $48.25M, down $250k from last season.

Normally, this was the spot to talk about free agents and compensation, but there was NO free agent on the roster. Maldo had been the only one and he had packed up his bundle and had gone home. Of course, David Barel would have been in that category, but he was shipped off to South Dakota when everything fell apart in the summer.

There were arbitration cases though, seven to be precise. [table unaltered at the bottom]

The only pitchers were Kevin Hitchcock, who was a no-brainer to extend, except that he was maybe also trade bait, and he would be a free agent *next* year, so he was surely evaluating his options with the franchise in the gutter right now. The other was Dave Saldivar, who was claimed on waivers, made two meh starts, then flubbed around the bullpen in September. He was 33 and still under team control. I was not very excited about him continuing to be on the roster, to be honest.

Also 33 by Opening Day: Matt Glodowski. He had hit left-handers fairly well for a few odd years, but he hadn’t even managed to do that one well in ’52. He was also a useless pelt. Oscar Rivera had gotten most of the playing time in September in the “right-handed rightfielder with bad defense” position, and while Rivera was 26, a total bust as the somewhat-highly-touted prospect that he was when we acquired him from the Gold Sox along with Willie Cruz and Eloy Sencion (my, wasn’t that a deal…!), and a total disaster in the field, but he’d be a disaster for the minimum and I was completely tired of Glodowski. He got the axe.

Two more cases where I wouldn’t have to think long or hard: Lonzo and Pucks, the latter a super-2, were on the list, and why would we get rid of *them*? In fact, Lonzo and Pucks were among the perhaps four or five players on the roster that were not available in a deal. Everything else was for grabs.

And then there were two sad excuses for left-handed batters, Mikio Suzuki and Ed Crispin. Both had gotten 300+ at-bats this year. Neither had managed to put even 1 WAR together. Crispin was nearly 26, and somehow had three full seasons under his belt, getting progressively worse, from a .724 OPS in 2050 to .699 and .642 by now. Suzuki was gonna be 30 next August, had never hit a thing, and would never hit a thing. He was an able outfielder, however, and neither of them would be expensive. They’d surely be kept around for backup spots.

Not that the Coons had a third base starter. Dave Blackshire had been meh in his September callup and would return to AAA most likely. If the Coons went after a free agent, then a third baseman was probably high on the list.

A first base starter was not. A broken wrist had kept Harry Ramsay from contributing in September, and he had batted only .188 in nine games before breaking his wrist in August, but the general consensus was that he was ready, even with similiarly weak results in St. Pete in 11 games before being acquired from the Thunder (in the trade that almost would have sent Wheats over there) and his brief spell in Portland. The majority of his season was spent in AAA Anaheim in the Thunder system, and there he batted .343 with 12 homers. If he could leverage THAT into the majors somehow, then we’d have a new first-sacker.

Speaking of Wheats, keeping him across the deadline allowed him to mature into having 10/5 rights, so why he wasn’t on my list of untouchables (Lonzo, Pucks, Taki, Raffy), he was probably still not going to go anywhere. The same wasn’t true for Waters, who’d not gain 10/5 rights until after the 2053 trade deadline.

Back to first base, Ramsay most likely being the designated starter there for 2053 moved Ken Crum back to the outfield, probably left. That would shift Fernando Perez to center. Now, Perez was injured a lot after coming over in a deal, but he also batted so well that he was the most cost-efficient player on the team in 2052, costing fewer than $90k per WAR (3.2 WAR on a minimum salary). Behind him came Raffy, Pucks, and Lonzo, then nothing for a while (those three were also around $100k/WAR on minimum deals). Sivertson (!), Larson (!), Waters, Brewer, Brobeck (!!!), and a tie for 10th between Raczka, Philipps, and Lillis before Taki showed up 13th on the list, just ahead of Crum. Taki, coming from Japan, obviously made big bucks despite being a rookie.

Oh well. Bit of a ramble here. In essence, lost of personnel available, but none of it had much value. Our farm was also barren. Fun times ahead.

[Westheim]

I found a way to export the batting register (which finished the year at 991 entries) into Excel, even though it’s partially borked, as Excel will think it’s smart and formats hundreds of data points into dates. F.e. Ron Alston had 10.4 WAR as a Coon, and Excel renders that as the 10th of April. A lot of work to be done on making that usable. But since I couldn’t cope with a batting register that will be incomplete in-game once we add another ten players to it (which will likely happen in ’53), I have to get that working *before* the new season starts. So the plan is anyway to update the Excel register by paw at the end of each season by using the seasonal batting register, which will include players that moved elsewhere during the season.

Wish me well. And please point out my fallacy if you spot one.

Oh yes, and I remain convinced… (glares at Excel, his favorite toy) …that runaway AI will in fact kill us all eventually.

+++

Without Maldo around anymore, the Coons’ top earner in 2053 projected to be 10/5-protected Jason Wheatley, who had been through his roughest season yet. I tended to wave it all off with some intelligible rabble about injuries and that his body thought the second half was the first half then and so on and so on, and nobody bought it, especially not Pat Degenhardt and Cristiano Carmona. Every metric had gotten a tad worse in 2052 for him. A few walks more, a few strikeouts less, a (significantly, actually) higher BABIP, and especially more homers in 162 innings than in 210+ the last few seasons before.

Ah! Humbug! He’s fine! (clings to a very confused Wheats whimpering for better times ahead)

There were only six other guaranteed contracts on the roster prior to arbitration. Taki and Crum would make $3M each, with another $1.98M for Matt Waters, $1.3M for Paul Crisler, and $1.2M for Justin Johns, which sounded like a lot of money for decided mediocre middle relievers at this stage. Then, another $900k for Victor Salcido, and I’d prefer not to talk about how he was due another $6M and small change over the three years after that.

Side note on Maldo’s retirement: his -1.6 WAR from ’52 removed, the Coons opened the offseason at the top of BNN’s WAR gains table. Addition by subtraction, boys!

(sighs deeply)

What did the Coons *not* need this offseason? Starting pitching was around in numbers and perhaps even quality. The pen could use a reboot, although there were maybe some gems hidden in the rubble, f.e. Jim Larson pitched remarkably well, putting together a 3.32 ERA in 41 outings, with his FIP even slightly below three. He sure won himself a spot on the roster.

We had three catchers on the roster that were all varying degrees of “aw shucks”, although as a last-place team forming a platoon out of Brewer and Raczka was perhaps defendable. Was this the right point to make the obligatory declaration of “somebody’s gotta bat eighth”?

So far we planned with Ramsay at first, and Waters and Lonzo up the middle, although Waters’ value was probably high right now (and I thought of him potentially taking the Platinum Stick), so things were murky there. Third base was a bothersome spot. In the outfield, Crum, Perez, and Pucks were not a terrible starting three, with Suzuki and Rivera as potential backups. …unless of course you traded Ken Crum for future disappointments and tore everything down even more.

The first notable thing of the offseason was actually a trade offer from the Falcons, putting up Chris Gowin, a pretty good catcher either way, who had hit for a .745 OPS in 91 games this year. The thing that disturbed me was how frequently they handed him back to AAA; he had made his debut as a 22-year-old all the way back in ’49. They wanted Mitch Sivertson and AA prospect Trent Brassfield, which was a no-deal. Brassfield aside, they’d also take Matt Waters. How kind.

October ran out with 1-year deals for several players. Ed Crispin signed for $425k; Lonzo agreed to $770k; Suzuki and Pucks took their arbitration estimates ($600k and $1.1M, respectively).

Dave Saldivar was non-tendered after all. Too old, too mellow, too grumpy. Even for a left-hander, it was too much baggage.

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October 28 – The Indians acquire RF/CF Mike Roberts (.294, 67 HR, 432 RBI) from the Bayhawks. The 30-year-old costs them three prospects, all ranked: #49 SP Josh Doyle, #62 SP Tauro Mata, and #182 OF Steven Heiden;
November 4 – The Indians pick up Boston’s SP Thomas Turpeau (25-19, 2.86 ERA) for the price of just one prospect, #188 OF Antonio Cruz.
November 5 – The Raccoons acquire 25-yr old C Chris Gowin (.250, 11 HR, 125 RBI) from the Falcons for MR Paul Crisler (26-23, 4.13 ERA, 18 SV), UT Mitch Sivertson (.276, 0 HR, 39 RBI), and AA 2B/SS Jordan Sanchez.

+++

Gowin is a surprising addition as the new primary catcher, but the Falcons started it. I wouldn’t have gone after him. The price was ultimately a mixed bag of loose stuff. Sivertson was a nice super utility, but even hitting .313 wasn’t enough for him to get to a 100 OPS+. Crisler signed a 3-year deal with the Coons and had repeated blow-ups in his first year, so we were not keen on seeing two more from him. Sanchez was a seemingly random ask from the Falcons. He was not rated highly, had no pedigree, and according to all the smart people in the office (Honeypaws, chiefly) also no future in the big leagues.

So we now have an army of surplus catchers. There’s worse problems to have, though.

What else? Matt Waters and Ken Crum were both floated to other teams at some point during this early part of the offseason. Waters drew quite some interest, although prospects of the highest level didn’t seem to sit very loose in an exchange for him. Ken Crum nobody wants to touch for reasons I have yet to figure out. The best offer (in terms of player value) that came back for him was for the Crusaders.

Andrew Russ.

Well played, Crusaders. Well played. **** you, too.

I am not sure I get it. Yes, he’s way down from his highwater mark of 27 homers for the Bayhawks, but he led the league in doubles this year and had an .815 OPS, 127 OPS+. He’s a switch-hitter with decent defense and not TOO much of a contract. He’s not even a ****.

No, I don’t think I get it.

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2052 ABL AWARDS

Players of the Year: NAS 1B Alejandro Ramos (.320, 39 HR, 107 RBI) and OCT 1B/SS/LF Ryan Cox (.299, 32 HR, 97 RBI)
Pitchers of the Year: DEN SP Gary Perrone (17-5, 2.42 ERA) and POR SP Seisaku Taki (16-8, 2.73 ERA)
Rookies of the Year: SAL INF/RF Joe Humphries (.263, 5 HR, 42 RBI) and POR SP Seisaku Taki (16-8, 2.73 ERA)
Relievers of the Year: DEN CL Mike Lynn (12-5, 2.58 ERA, 36 SV) and ATL CL David Hardaway (6-6, 2.78 ERA, 39 SV)
Platinum Sticks (FL): P RIC Eric Braley – C TOP Matt McLaren – 1B NAS Alejandro Ramos – 2B DEN Ivan Villa – 3B PIT Victor Corrales – SS SFW Julio Moriel – LF SFW Mario Villa – CF DEN Sandy Castillo – RF DAL Dario Martinez
Platinum Sticks (CL): P TIJ Larry Colwell – C IND Manny Poindexter – 1B OCT David Worthington – 2B POR Matt Waters – 3B NYC Prince Gates – SS MIL Zach Suggs – LF OCT Ryan Cox – CF VAN Damian Moreno – RF IND Bill Quinteros
Gold Gloves (FL): P SAC Craig Czyszczon – C DEN Blake Mickle – 1B SAC Steve Wyatt – 2B LAP Shane Larsen – 3B PIT Victor Corrales – SS CIN Juan Ojeda – LF DAL Omar Gonzalez – CF WAS Jason Monson – RF CIN Chad Williams
Gold Gloves (CL): P POR Seisaku Taki – C VAN Julio Diaz – 1B OCT David Worthington – 2B OCT Jonathan Ban – 3B NYC Prince Gates – SS VAN Dan Mullen – LF VAN Tim Turner – CF ATL Steve Royer – RF BOS Tony Lopez

Takiiiiiii!!

That’s not a terrible haul for a last-place team. We had pennant winners that took home less individual silverware. I didn’t expect him to win Pitcher of the Year at all…! And I am actually very surprised that Taki beat out Damian Moreno for rookie honors.

Very surprised, but still cackling with glee.

[Westheim]

Randy Wilken would have been a great addition to the Raccoons right now, with third base basically a walk-on position with open tryouts. He had batted .265 with 26 homers for the Caps this year, was an excellent defensive third baseman, and was known to be a hard worker and work others hard. The only problem was that he was a type A free agent, and the Raccoons were not bloody quite in the “to heck with draft picks!” part of the endless “you win some, you lose some” cycle.

We lost plenty in 2052.

Other sensible options were prickly, too. Since we had dosh and no talent to spare, the free agent market was where I threw out my bait. Steve Diaz, 31, and mostly a Federal League veteran except for his debut with the Baybirds, was available. He played all infield positions well enough. He hit well enough for contact. Well enough for power. Had a well enough eye. To be honest, his scouting report was full of 10’s and 11’s and the dullest thing you’d ever see. Not so dull was his expectation of a 6-yr, $15M contract. The Coons might have thrown $2M a year at him, but not until his age 37 season. We’d just been through that.

Much cheaper was well-travelled village mattress Travis Malkus, well known from his time with the Elks, but since then he’d seemingly swung away at the baseball in a different place every other month. 2052 those places had been Nashville and … Unity? The Sox’ AAA team, the Grizzlies. Not sure exactly why they banished him to there for 60 games, but he hit .285 with two homers for the Sox in 68 other games. He still had some life in him at the hot corner at age 33 (by May), and was much more willing to talk about a 1-year deal.

And really, the thing here was not so much that we didn’t have dosh – we had eight figures to toss out – but that I didn’t want to bury the team with a 6-year deal for a decidedly average player.

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November 15 – The Loggers send RF/LF Craig Sayre (.247, 12 HR, 102 RBI) to the Blue Sox for super utility Jose Rodriguez (.246, 46 HR, 271 RBI) and a prospect.
November 15 – Sam Turner (.231, 16 HR, 104 RBI), who worked the Knights to a pennant, is acquired by the Buffaloes, along with a prospect, for 36-year-old RF J.P. Angeletti (.271, 185 HR, 941 RBI), in one of the first “wait, what?” transactions of the offseason.
November 17 – Boston sends OF Adam Bumpus (.233, 2 HR, 32 RBI) to Sacramento after his rookie season, picking up #186 prospect OF/1B Israel Santiago instead.
November 18 – The Scorpions get MR Mike Lane (4-4, 4.30 ERA) along with #187 prospect CL Kyle Zanni from the Miners instead, parting with outfielder Diego Mayorga (.281, 5 HR, 43 RBI).
November 21 – INF Mario Coto (.249, 36 HR, 198 RBI) is sent from Dallas to Topeka, along with a prospect, for 1B Victor Cruz (.311, 18 HR, 112 RBI).
November 23 – The Buffaloes keep adding, signing ex-SAC LF/RF/1B Nate Culp (.275, 182 HR, 598 RBI) to a 2-yr, $8.8M contract.
November 29 – 29-year-old former Capitals 3B Randy Wilken (.245, 118 HR, 406 RBI) signs a 3-yr, $3.72M contract with the Stars.
November 30 – The Canadiens throw $13.2M over two years at 38-year-old middle infielder Tony Aparicio (.290, 238 HR, 1,285 RBI), formerly of the Buffaloes.
November 30 – Richmond signs ex-LVA SP Chris Cornelius (59-44, 3.84 ERA) to a 2-yr, $3.74M deal.
December 1 – The Thunder win the bidding for ex-POR/SFW SP David Barel (103-87, 2.81 ERA). The 31-year-old southpaw will net a staggering $37.18M over six years.
December 1 – In turn, Oklahoma trades SP Elijah Powell (65-75, 4.78 ERA), who lost 18 games in 2052, to the Gold Sox for two prospects.
December 1 – The Buffaloes also add 34-yr old LF/RF/1B Eddie Moreno (.276, 353 HR, 1,224 RBI) from their division rivals, the Miners, for a 2-yr, $8.16M contract.
December 1 – Rule 5 Draft: 15 players are taken in the draft. The Raccoons draft 23-year-old right-handed AAA CL Antonio Alfaro from the Scorpions. The Warriors draft 25-year-old right-hander MR Políbio O’Higgins (3-5, 5.26 ERA) from the Raccoons.

+++

Maud, why did Wilken sign for so cheap…?? – Really? In his basement? – Well, *how many* bodies?

I can’t wait to see where that $6.6M/year contract for a 38-year-old middle infielder leads the damn Elks. It’ll probably still be enough to beat the Raccoons, I fear.

Alfaro will be 24 by January, but he looks like a nice midde-innings piece for a team that doesn’t have any tangible ambitions for the next year or three. As far as O’Higgins is concerned, the Raccoons used a whopping 50 players in 2052, 25 of them pitchers, and he was not one of them.

Matt Glodowski was soon signed by the Aces for $360k and will now hit six homers against Portland annually;

[Westheim]

A few winters ago, the Miners spent nine figures on new players, which they’ve tried to selectively get rid of ever since. It’s not the first time we’ve been offered Anton Venegas. Now, Venegas would tick quite a few boxes – he’s an excellent defensive third baseman, he’s hitting over .300, and he can even swipe bases. Unfortunately he knew too well that he was good and had thus a surfeit of “attitude”, and he also came with five years left on a 7-yr, $34.96M contract, and the Raccoons were none to keen of footing that bill, especially with the contract backloaded and over $27M still on that bloody thing. We had just gotten through our phase of dragging a late-30s “third baseman” that got 30 grand just for tying his shoes to the grim physical end of his major league career.

And yes, it was a straight salary dump. These (and more) were all players that – individually! – would be enough compensation for the Miners for five years of Venegas: Cameron Argenziano. Aaron Brewer. Ed Crispin. Ryan Harmer. Jim Larson. Mikio Suzuki. Prospero Tenazes. Nick Thomason. Guido Kauffman (who??). Jeff ******* Raczka.

We sure weren’t being the only ones offered such a great deal. I didn’t want to be the only one so stupid as to take it, though.

And Cristiano informs me that Guido Kauffman is a 20-year-old Bonairean right-hander that put up a 5.64 ERA in 23 games for the Beagles this year, and that he has a crisp bum. – Is that in the scouting report, Cristiano? – Why are you blushing?

+++

December 2 – The Canadiens add ex-NYC RF/LF Adam Magnussen (.259, 65 HR, 403 RBI) for $16.56M over four years.
December 2 – Often-injured former Aces CF Brent Cramer (.274, 57 HR, 301 RBI) signs a 2-yr, $5.28M contract with the Bayhawks.
December 3 – Former Knights SP Kodai Koga (66-73, 3.79 ERA) joins the Bayhawks for a mere $3.6M over three years.
December 3 – The Crusaders land ex-CHA OF Oscar Caballero (.271, 45 HR, 382 RBI), who led the CL in triple and RBI in 2052, with a 3-yr, $9.72M offer.
December 3 – New York goes on to acquire C Aaron Kissler (.271, 8 HR, 46 RBI) from the Scorpions for outfielder Rick Colwill (.309, 2 HR, 26 RBI) and a prospect.
December 3 – The Indians add to the rotation with 25-yr old SP James Powell (20-29, 4.55 ERA) from the Rebels. Richmond gets two prospects.
December 5 – Next, the Indians send OF Chaz Kokel (.239, 24 HR, 172 RBI) to Sacramento for left-hander Joe Nix (25-26, 3.31 ERA, 6 SV) and a prospect.
December 5 – Infielder Jeremy Stalker (.274, 5 HR, 44 RBI) is acquired along with a prospect by the Buffaloes, while the Pacifics get OF William Kulak (.259, 8 HR, 60 RBI).
December 6 – The Wolves get OF Joshua Shaw (.328, 17 HR, 203 RBI) from the Canadiens in exchange for 33-yr old SP Leo Iniguez (69-86, 4.14 ERA), seven figures in cash, and #108 prospect OF Pedro de Leon.
December 9 – The Coons sign ex-NAS 2B/3B Travis Malkus (.258, 68 HR, 510 RBI) to an $850k contract for the 2053 season.
December 13 – The Aces throw $600k at the remains of Canadiens icon Jerry Outram (.324, 302 HR, 1,200 RBI). The 38-year-old, 5-time Player of the Year made only seven starts and hit just two homers for all of 2052 and due to a broken kneecap might not even be ready for Opening Day.

+++

Nope, Outram’s two homers didn’t come against Portland in ’52. But five of his 18 RBI did.

It’s hard to get excited about Malkus, a 32-year-old, hot-potato middle infielder. But he had a knack for getting on base and I had the crazy idea that he might start half the games (split with Crispin) at third base and actually bat leadoff ahead of Lonzo.

[Westheim]

Didn’t I say earlier that I wasn’t gonna sign a player named Travis ever again??

+++

December 22 – 34-year-old ex-NAS LF/RF Billy Hester (.262, 172 HR, 876 RBI) opts to sign with the Blue Sox’ division rivals from Topeka, netting a 3-yr, $6.5M contract.
December 23 – Less than half a season after getting traded to the Miners, veteran lefty MR Joy-shan Kuo (38-36, 3.13 ERA, 120 SV) returns to the Pacifics on a 3-yr, $5.16M deal.
December 24 – Despite being unlikely to pitch again before the All Star Game as he is recovering from Tommy John surgery, ex-DAL SP Bubba Wolinsky (64-48, 3.90 ERA) lands a 4-yr, $18.56M contract from the Scorpions.
December 24 – The Knights sign ex-DEN SP Dave Hils (161-143, 3.71 ERA); the 36-year-old will receive $1.8M for the 2053 season.
December 25 – The Stars nip ex-CIN/SAC INF Steve Diaz (.266, 54 HR, 356 RBI) with a 4-yr, $7.06M contract.
December 25 – The Canadiens add 36-year-old FL veteran 1B Manny Liberos (.244, 286 HR, 1,119 RBI) for a 1-year deal worth $1.2M.
December 25 – The Raccoons add former Blue Sox left-hander MR Victor Flores (13-20, 4.58 ERA, 9 SV) for $650k for the 2053 season.
December 28 – Vancouver gets pitching, too, singing former Bayhawks SP Jesse Bulas (80-77, 3.75 ERA) to a 2-yr, $9.28M deal.
December 29 – While the Gold Sox throw a 7-yr, $36.24M contract to lock up 30-yr old erstwhile Stars outfielder Omar Gonzalez (.314, 51 HR, 595 RBI)…
December 29 – …Dallas has to go for 32-yr old former Cyclones outfielder Felix Rojas (.262, 66 HR, 401 RBI) with a 2-yr, $1.98M contract.
January 2 – 29-year-old SP Victor Scott (39-38, 3.30 ERA, 8 SV), who won the 2052 CL ERA title as a Titan, has to settle for a $1.9M contract with the Falcons for just the 2053 season.
January 5 – The Raccoons add 2049 CL Pitcher of the Year, ex-TIJ/RIC SP/MR Kevin Daley (78-78, 3.52 ERA, 12 SV), who lost his changeup in the meantime, and has yet to find it again. He’ll make $3.6M over two years.
January 9 – Right-handed SP J.J. Hendrix (83-65, 3.76 ERA) goes from the Falcons to the Capitals on a 4-yr, $16.16M deal.

+++

Good for Bubba!

What’s with all the new relievers? Don’t we still have old relievers? Well, yeah, but maybe I’m also trying to shed one or two of those. It would help if the Thunder, who are very interested in [guy], had at least a sliver of budget space, though…!

Ex-Coons changing sleeping spots: Shuta Yamamoto got $452k from the Pacifics; Eddy Luna joined the Caps for $402k; Topeka threw $840k at Aaron Curl; the Blue Sox added Ricky Jimenez for $1.42M; Mike Preble is 39 now and also a damn Elk for $970k; the Falcons paid $432k to Brian Kaufman;

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2053 HALL OF FAME VOTING

Except for his final season with the Falcons, Nate Evans was strictly a Federal League catcher, spending a total of 14 seasons with the Capitals alone. He also became the only new member of the Hall of Fame in 2053, sneaking into the building with 77% of the vote. Evans was a 9-time All Star, and won one of everything: one batting title, one Gold Glove, one Platinum Stick, and one World Series ring. He also led the league in doubles once, which was also the batting title season in 2034. He batted .310/.377/.440 with 2,527 base hits, 185 homers, and 1,250 RBI, while also stealing the occasional base, with 50 in total.

WAS C Nate Evans – 2nd – 77.3 – INDUCTED
??? CL Josh Boles – 4th – 56.4
??? CL Chris Henry – 2nd – 54.9
SAL C Morgan Kuhlmann – 2nd – 27.9
BOS SP Rich Willett – 1st – 16.0
LAP CF Justin Fowler – 8th – 15.3
DAL SP Eric Weitz – 2nd – 14.4
??? C Adam Horner – 1st – 8.6
BOS LF Willie Vega – 5th – 6.4
SAC CF Mark Vermillion – 1st – 5.8
TOP SP David Elliott – 7th – 5.8
SFW 2B Mario Colon – 3rd – 5.5
??? SP Jerry Banda – 1st – 3.7 – DROPPED
DEN SP Bill Quintero – 1st – 3.1 – DROPPED
??? 2B Ben Freeman – 1st – 0.0 – DROPPED

[Westheim]

January was spent clawing back and forth passive-aggressive messages with the Thunder. The Raccoons wanted to shed some more of their lousy ’52 pen for maybe the odd prospect or two. The Thunder wished to part with 37-year-old Ramon Sifuentes after triggering his vesting 2053 option for $1.7M in the first place. Now, he had hit .291 with 11 homers and was still playing a solid third base, so there was nothing profoundly wrong with taking him on for his age 38 season (he hatched in February of 2015). Defensively he had still done decently at the hot corner in the past season, surely passing the eyeball test.

Cristiano, if you want to show me a chart with some silly numbers, I’ll fold it up and hit you over the head with it.

Thing was that the package wasn’t coming together. The Thunder had few prospects of value to begin with, and while they’d merrily trade Sifuentes for Justin Johns, f.e., they wouldn’t do Sifuentes and prospect Jake Griggs for Johns and another reliever or other piece, or even two pieces (we had surplus catching, too).

This was when Victor Salcido would have been enough to close the deal, but I was still resisting. The bugger had pitched not one, but TWO no-hitters, how could he possibly bust at age 25…??

Cristiano, if you show me a chart with some silly numbers, I’ll crumble it up and stuff it up where no sun ever shines.

While I didn’t have any actual plan what to do with Salcido come April (rotation, pen, AAA, sideloading as a hot dog vendor?), I also learned some grim truths about Kevin Hitchcock’s value, which seemed to be about zero, or just below that. The Thunder categorically refused him, and no team offered *anything* when I dangled him on the shopping line – multiple times. He was far from the ideal closer, but the Hessian had put together seasons with ERA’s of 1.89, 2.20, and 2.72; getting worse for sure, but certainly workable!? No? Am I the mad one, yet again?

Cristiano, if you show me one more chart with silly numbers, I’ll roll it up and cram it up where you usually put your catheters.

Slight side complication? When the Raccoons signed Kevin Daley they never said no when he casually remarked that he’d be their best closer in recent memory, because we expected to clear space at the meaty end of the pen in a trade. Also, the 40-man roster was full and there was nowhere to put Daley. (cough) In the end, Prospero Tenazes ended up on waivers when Daley’s 10-day grace period waiting for assignment ran out, and just as the Sifuentes deal finally fell through.

+++

January 12 – The Wolves sign ex-SFB MR Brad Barnes (32-25, 3.79 ERA, 93 SV) to a 3-yr, $5.4M contract.
January 26 – The Aces acquire SP Juan Mercado (21-16, 4.17 ERA) in a trade with the Stars, who receive a prospect.
January 31 – Dallas signs up ex-DEN MR Brian Shan (40-18, 2.95 ERA, 51 SV) for three years and $8.56M.

[Westheim]

With the signing of Brian Shan, a type A free agent, the Stars sent the #23 pick back to the Gold Sox at the end of January, just the same place where they had got it from in the first place when Denver had signed Omar Gonzalez in December. Not that it was the original pick of any of those two teams – it had originated with the Knights, who had forfeited it in the first place when they signed Dave Hils even earlier.

And the Coons? Still picking third, still not knowing what to do with themselves.

In February, the Coons still sat on eight figures of budget space and tried to figure out how to make a deal for an older veteran with a big contract, that could still contribute, while also somehow snatching a prospect, and while themselves only parting with spare bits and pieces. It was asking for a lot, really.

The Titans had gone into rebuilding mode, and had repeatedly offered a group of players for all of last year whenever I dangled a warm body, including Tony Lopez, who had turned 30 last May, but had won three straight Gold Gloves in rightfield at this point. There were quite a few things I didn’t like about Tony Lopez; he struck out like no tomorrow, and at the same time had never hit 20 homers. He had never hit better than .265, so he’d probably hit .195 as a Coon… But he put up 100+ OPS+ values for four straight years, and that with a Gold Glove subscription, and at least some speed, although he didn’t swipe a single base in ’52 after taking 15 in ’51. His contract was also ludicrous: $3.6M in the coming season, and $4M in ’54, after which he’d be a free agent. He was a right-handed hitting rightfielder that would take Oscar Rivera’s spot for sure.

The Titans also routinely shopped Larry Rodriguez, who was a pretty, pretty good first baseman, but the Coons had committed to Harry Ramsey. Ramsay? Something like that. I’ll probably learn at some point.

Oscar Rivera had batted .256 with five homers in regular appearances in September, 148 PA in all in 2052. But he was already 27, and he was an atrocious defender. Given the chance, he’d probably also win a strikeout title (makes unsure paw movement) like Lopez already had. Oh yes, he had power; he had also hit 20 homers in St. Pete last season. But he was a lazy foul-mouthed bum… and Lopez had a reputation as a team leader. So that’s an improvement right there.

And the problem here wasn’t getting *Tony Lopez*. They’d take a Lonzo or a Pucks. But they didn’t ask for them. The Titans would send you your personal engraved copy of Tony Lopez for any of the following: Kevin Hitchcock, Aaron Brewer, Ed Crispin, Brett Lillis jr., Mikio Suzuki, various other backbenchers on the extended roster, our ******* Rule 5 pick, the ominous Guido Kauffman again, or a warm meal with two eggs. One egg if you drove a real hard bargain.

It was just the silly old man at the trade lever again, insisting on getting outfield prospect Matt Gilmore in the deal. It wasn’t working – unless we included Phil Baker in the deal… who wasn’t one of my hard no’s, but the idea was to add young talent.

+++

February 1 – The Condors sign on former Thunder closer Dale Mrazek (49-44, 3.43 ERA, 280 SV). The 33-year-old right-hander will make $6.84M over three years.
February 10 – DAL 2B Sergio Quiroz, who batted .302 with 8 HR and 49 RBI last year, took a fall while hoverboarding with his kids and is out with a broken leg. He is not expected to return before May.
February 10 – The Rebels acquire INF Todd Dau (.238, 31 HR, 238 RBI) from the Bayhawks, along with cash, for 2B/LF Nick Roseto (.256, 6 HR, 60 RBI) and a prospect.
February 21 – The Raccoons acquire OF Tony Lopez (.247, 107 HR, 536 RBI) and MR Steve Watson (3-2, 3.83 ERA, 2 SV) from the Titans for C Aaron Brewer (.271, 9 HR, 42 RBI) and MR Justin Johns (50-63, 4.33 ERA, 32 SV) going to Boston.
February 23 – The Thunder shift custody of C Sean Suggs (.307, 127 HR, 580 RBI) to the Knights in exchange for MR Gustavo Chapa (16-18, 3.35 ERA, 39 SV) and #32 prospect SP Pedro Mendoza. It’s the third time Suggs gets traded in 19 months.

+++

Watson was an uncontrollably wild mess. Elite fastball and changeup, and hard to hit – but every other pitch seemed to either hit the batter in the elbow or his own catcher in the groin. He’d be in AAA to start the season despite spending the entire 2052 season on the major league roster. So he wasn’t even eligible for prospect rankings anymore, either!

That trade was already an L!

With the trade, the back end of the pen was reduced to the pair of Kevins. Lillis, Larson, and Flores would be on the roster for sure, but who else? The Coons had Wheats, Taki, and Raffy in the rotation, guaranteed, but the rest was all a bit of a mess. There were four pitching jobs left to give away, and on the major league roster, extended version, alone there were another nine pitchers whining for attention, including at this point Watson. The others were Phil Baker, Cameron Argenziano, Victor Salcido, Mike Snyder, Antonio Alfaro (the Rule 5 pick), Ryan Harmer, Eric Reese, and Raul Medrano – and except for Salcido (and Alfaro, who could not be moved to the minors), they all had options.

So a good first step would be to make up your mind whether Salcido was going to start or be used in garbage relief. Again, 2-8 with a 5.57 ERA last year, and that ERA was only partially salvaged with 11 relief outings late in the season. He had walked 7.1/9 in the majors, and 3.8/9 in the minors. He had also pitched two no-hitters earlier in his career. He was 27, which was a weird time to hit the *******.

Since the Coons were unlikely to compete for anything nice, I tended to give him April in the rotation, and if the results were similarly grim as last year, kick him into long relief until he’d be entirely untenable. And yes, several trades this winter did not come to fruition because the Raccoons wouldn’t let go of Victor Salcido. Oh, this one was gonna be interesting to watch …!

Also interesting: with the departure of Justin Johns, age 34, to Boston, there was currently not a 33-year-old or older player on the roster. Travis Malkus would turn 33 in late May, and the only other 32-year-olds were Wheats and Waters, the last two mainstay holdouts from the glory days. (Again, Hitchcock also had two rings, but had only made a combined 40 appearances for those, including three in the playoffs, where he got on the snout)

Other Critters with new employers: Cullen Tortora signed with the Wolves for $446k; the Thunder spent $490k on Rikuto Ito;

[Westheim]

Perhaps the most notable development about the Raccoons and their muddled roster ahead of the 2053 season was that in mid-March we signed a 6-yr, $7.64M extension with Lonzo that would buy out his remaining two years of team control and then give us four more years at $1.44M each, which seemed almost a bit cheap, even though he hadn’t hit for a 100 OPS+ in a full season yet. But there was the Gold Glove defense at short and there was the three consecutive stolen base titles. And somebody had to bat … uh, second?

But, yeah, Lonzo would start the season on 213 bags taken. Unless injuries intervened, he’d probably break into the top 100 in career stolen bases at some point in May, the same month he’d turn 26. The bottom threshold for the top 100 was 229 bags, a tie for 99th place.

We also decided to keep Antonio Alfaro rather than return him to Sacramento, which reduced the number of available pitching spots to three. Phil Baker and Victor Salcido (twitches) were named the #4 and #5 starters, which gave us a rotation without left-handed pitchers, but, hey, who honestly expected Salcido to last longer than four or five starts?

The Miners kept offering Anton Venegas, with Trent Brassfield a popular target once again, but they kept beating a very dead horse there.

+++

March 10 – The Knights swap OF/1B Steve Royer (.278, 33 HR, 268 RBI) to the Scorpions for SP Matt Weber (57-48, 4.08 ERA) and #187 prospect CL Kyle Zanni, who is traded for the second time this offseason.

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As far as former Raccoons are concerned? The Crusaders signed Arturo Carreno for $418k; the Elks added Josh Rella for $660k; Armando Herrera went to the Buffos for $550k; 42-year-old Josh Livingston snatched $580k from the Indians;

[Westheim]

2053 PORTLAND RACCOONS – Opening Day Roster (first set in parenthesis shows 2052 stats, second set career stats; players with an * are off season acquisitions):

SP Jason Wheatley, 32, B:R, T:R (7-10, 4.17 ERA | 131-88, 3.36 ERA) – Wheatley’s 2052 was a tumble from one pot of lard into the next; leaving the Opening Day start with an injury, he returned in late May, but never pieced himself together again, leading to a shambolic run of two months without a W. And all that after he won his second ERA title the year before…! We do have full confidence that it will get better. Because it can’t get much worse. (glances at Salcido) Okay, let me rephrase that… One of only two three-ringed Coons remaining (Waters). He has five good to very good pitches, and when he mixes them well can breeze through innings untouched. Which didn’t happen a lot last year.
SP Seisaku Taki, 25, B:R, T:R (16-8, 2.73 ERA | 16-8, 2.73 ERA) – right-handed groundballer that was imported from Japan to some success, like, uh, winning both Rookie of the Year and Pitcher of the Year in addition to a Gold Glove in his debut season. Taki has three very good pitches, throws 95, and should continue to be a delight. Already on track to be the team’s best Japanese import since Yoshi Nomura…!
SP Rafael de la Cruz, 22, B:L, T:R (11-12, 3.32 ERA | 18-20, 3.70 ERA) – it wasn’t all golden for golden boy in his debut season, but he worked respectably well in his first 21 starts. Things improved in his first full season as he shaved off a full run on his ERA, but also pitched an inning less than Taki per start, despite arguably the better arsenal, or at least potential. He can throw 100 for strikes, and still keep the damn thing on the ground; as soon as he works out some kinks, he’ll be a terror on the league. For sure!
SP Phil Baker, 24, B:R, T:R (3-4, 4.74 ERA | 3-4, 4.74 ERA) – supplemental-round pick from 2050, who debuted on the fast track and overall held his own on a team that didn’t hold onto much of anything in 2052. Made eight starts with a four-pitch arsenal and easily slid into the #4 spot to begin this season.
SP Victor Salcido, 27, B:R, T:R (2-8, 5.57 ERA | 33-37, 3.83 ERA) – 2052 was an unmitigated disaster for the Raccoons, and especially Salcido, who threw two no-hitters by age 25, and in ’52 threw nothing but hot garbage, culminating in a demotion to AAA and garbage relief duty in September. Walked 7.1/9 in the majors across 74.1 innings, almost twice his previous career rate. Definitely living on borrowed time in the rotation.

SP/MR Antonio Alfaro *, 24, B:R, T:R (no stats) – Rule 5 pick from the Scorpions with a interesting cutter, slider, and changeup arsenal and apparently very fine control for a 23-year-old, walking 2.6/9 in AAA last year. He would actually be a candidate for a back end of the rotation spot (Salcido, cough) if he wasn’t so low on stamina, and since he didn’t exactly blow people away, that only left a middle relief role for him.
MR Victor Flores *, 31, B:L, T:L (1-1, 5.10 ERA, 1 SV | 13-20, 4.58 ERA, 9 SV) – fastball at 94, a swooping curve, and a mandate to not let him run face-first into too many right-handed power hitters; more of a specialist lefty.
MR Ryan Harmer, 25, B:L, T:R (1-1, 4.55 ERA | 1-1, 4.55 ERA) – unspectacular righty with control issues that made his debut in 2052 and didn’t always keep me calm. That could honestly be a description for half the damn roster… Beats out Mike Snyder for the final spot in the pen mostly because Snyder annoyed me even more.
MR Jim Larson, 26, B:R, T:R (2-3, 2.86 ERA | 2-3, 3.32 ERA) – the least annoying bit reliever last year, pitching in 37 games after an early promotion without ever drawing substantial ire, thus destined to get dumped to Ham Lake in May with a 7.50 ERA. See: Sencion, Eloy.
MR Brett Lillis jr., 27, B:L, T:L (0-6, 5.47 ERA, 3 SV | 5-9, 3.77 ERA, 3 SV) – his father was a fairly pleasant presence on some Coons rosters that never progressed past the CLCS, but the offspring had quite the hard time of it in odd bits of major league playing time in 2049 and 2050, but seemed to have turned it around in 2051 after starting the season in AAA. In 2052… (looks at record and ERA) Well. A .348 BABIP against him didn’t help, I guess. Principal lefty to begin the season.
SU Kevin Hitchcock, 30, B:R, T:R (2-5, 2.72 ERA, 33 SV | 14-18, 3.03 ERA, 63 SV) – the German right-hander seems to have finally figured his own stuff out and after a stellar 2050 season won the closer’s job from Willie Cruz a few months into the 2051 campaign. No major complaints in ’52, either, although we had to find out that he apparently had no trade value, and he’s also been dumped to the setup role with the addition of Kevin Daley, which might be one of the first sources of friction on the team.
CL Kevin Daley *, 30, B:R, T:R (4-6, 3.29 ERA, 11 SV | 78-78, 3.52 ERA, 12 SV) – free agent addition on a 2-year deal with a 97mph heater and a vicious slider; was a starting pitcher early in his career, winning an ERA title and Pitcher of the Year as a Condor in 2049 before losing his changeup and leading the league in losses the year after. That won’t happen with him here; that would require actually getting a lead to him on a semi-regular basis.

C Chris Gowin *, 26, B:R, T:R (.298, 1 HR, 40 RBI | .250, 11 HR, 125 RBI) – very fine defensive catcher the Falcons didn’t know what to do with and dumped onto the Raccoons for odd bits and pieces that didn’t fit anyway. We see some power potential, but so far he’s mostly swung a singles bat in the majors, with the assumed lead-footedness for a catcher on top of that.
C/1B Tyler Philipps, 26, B:R, T:R (.271, 0 HR, 8 RBI | .263, 2 HR, 18 RBI) – excellent defensive catcher that debuted late in the 2051 season, then made the Opening Day roster behind Sean Suggs in ’52, but ended up spending most of his time in AAA again after an early demotion. Has a 113 OPS+ for his scant career that we generously ascribe to a small sample size, because nobody expects actual heroics from him any time soon.

1B Harry Ramsay, 25, B:L, T:L (.227, 3 HR, 10 RBI | .256, 4 HR, 14 RBI) – we see a 20+ homer bat there, and it took a bit to break him away from the Thunder; solid defensively, but slow on the bases; also batted only .188 in nine games in a brief cup of coffee for the Coons before derailing a more extended showcase in September by breaking his paw in AAA and missing the entire month.
2B/SS Matt Waters, 32, B:S, T:R (.288, 27 HR, 79 RBI | .261, 179 HR, 672 RBI) – Home Run King! …in 2048. Returned to being a force last year, however, after having a mighty struggle for all of ’51. Still in the conversation for leadoff here, even though that wastes so much of his power. Still stealing 20+ bags a year as well, although we notice his defense softening up a bit by now. There are four years left on that 10-year deal he insisted on signing prior to 2047.
SS/3B Lorenzo Lavorano, 25, B:R, T:R (.265, 2 HR, 47 RBI | .278, 10 HR, 160 RBI) – Everybody loves Lonzo! If you don’t love Lonzo, you can’t be my friend…! Has won three stolen base titles in three full seasons, and we have already elaborated on how his sub-.700 OPS means little when he can turn the singles and (rare) walks into doubles like that. And I wouldn’t sneeze at the Gold Glove he won at short in ’51, either! If only he’d walk more, he’d be the perfect leadoff man. Regardless, the Coon locked him up with a 6-year deal in March.
2B/3B/1B/SS Travis Malkus *, 32, B:R, T:R (.285, 2 HR, 30 RBI | .258, 68 HR, 510 RBI) – maybe the primary third baseman (it’s complicated), the free agent acquisition Malkus knows his way around the CL North (having played for the Elks and Loggers before), but isn’t anything spectacular himself, checking in for under seven figures on a one-year deal.
3B Ed Crispin, 26, B:L, T:R (.218, 6 HR, 29 RBI | .250, 23 HR, 141 RBI) – once upon a time one of the returns from the Rebels in the deal that sent Josh Rella away, Crispin’s a good defender at the hot corner, which is about as many good things I have to say about him. Easily replaceable should the opportunity arise.
3B/2B/SS Dave Blackshire, 25, B:R, T:R (.200, 1 HR, 1 RBI | .200, 1 HR, 1 RBI) – further convoluting the situation at the hot corner is 25-year-old Blackshire, whose claim to fame might also be his defense, which isn’t boding well. His middle infield defense is nothing to write home about, and the Coons might want to keep looking for a defensive middle infielder to replace one of the third basemen.

1B/LF/RF Ken Crum, 30, B:S, T:L (.296, 14 HR, 88 RBI | .288, 99 HR, 545 RBI) – spent most of the time at first base last year, but returns to the outfield full time in ’53. Led the CL in doubles with 43, thus partially making up for never even coming close to the 27 bombs he hit for the Bayhawks as a 26-year-old, which fooled us into scratching him away from them.
LF/1B/RF/CF Alan Puckeridge, 25, B:L, T:R (.319, 7 HR, 56 RBI | .302, 27 HR, 194 RBI) – the Aussie matched his .817 OPS from 2051 again last year, but also matched 2050’s record of injuries and missing 50-ish games. Has to start in his worst position to get the three good outfield bats into the lineup at all, although he’s really good on the corners, so he can shuffle there on rest days for other players. Also a frequent member of the 20+ stolen bases club, with 74 for his career.
RF/LF/CF Tony Lopez *, 30, B:R, T:R (.246, 16 HR, 55 RBI | .247, 107 HR, 536 RBI) – the Titans insisted on giving the last two (expensive) years on his contract away for precious little in return, and he looks like he can stay a force (with three Gold Gloves) in rightfield for quite a while longer. Does strike out A LOT though.
RF/LF/CF Fernando Perez, 27, B:L, T:L (.326, 5 HR, 33 RBI | .285, 9 HR, 59 RBI) – hit merely 70 points above his career average between the Warriors and Coons in 2052, so we should not expect him to repeat that .868 OPS (.915 for us), in half a season no less. Does everything quite well, though, except really hitting for power.
RF/CF/ LF Mikio Suzuki, 29, B:L, T:L (.243, 2 HR, 25 RBI | .246, 8 HR, 75 RBI) – three years after getting signed on the cheap out of Japan, Suzuki is a less spectacular copy of Fernando Perez, who himself can’t really justify his roster spot.

On disabled list: Nobody.

Otherwise unavailable: Nobody.

Other roster movement:
SP Cameron Argenziano, 24, B:R, T:L (1-6, 4.33 ERA | 1-6, 4.33 ERA) – optioned to AAA; groundballer with four pitches that consistently pitched haplessly and needed a dozen starts to scratch out a measly win. Not sure what further ripening in AAA can even do for him.
MR Raul Medrano, 25, B:R, T:R (0-0, 0.00 ERA | 0-0, 0.00 ERA) – optioned to AAA; only made a few odd appearances, but 8.1 scoreless innings are nothing to be sneezed at entirely. Same problem has many others in the organization on the fringe of the bullpen, though: good stuff, not enough control, walking 9.5/9 in AAA (!) last year.
MR Steve Watson *, 22, B:R, T:R (3-2, 3.83 ERA, 2 SV | 3-2, 3.83 ERA, 2 SV) – optioned to AAA; tossed into the Tony Lopez trade by the Titans, he’s perhaps the poster child of a kid playing with matches amongst our young right-handed relievers. Pat Degenhardt gives his stuff a “20”, but he has no clue where it goes and walked 37 batters in 42.1 innings for the Titans last year. Definitely needs more seasoning outside of the spotlight.
MR Eric Reese, 25, B:L, T:L (0-1, 5.40 ERA | 0-1, 4.07 ERA) – optioned to AAA; walked too many for being mostly employed as situational left-hander, and also got whacked quite a bit. That .353 BABIP didn’t make it any better, either.
MR Mike Snyder, 26, B:S, T:R (0-1, 4.46 ERA | 4-1, 4.54 ERA) – optioned to AAA; devastating curveball with a 95mph cutter, not bad a for a “failed starter” who was a first-round pick (#21 at least) in the 2045 draft. Quite serious control problems, though, walking over six batters per nine innings in 78 appearances across his three partial major league seasons. Extremely infuriating to watch.
C Jeff Raczka, 29, B:L, T:R (.232, 2 HR, 10 RBI | .218, 4 HR, 21 RBI) – waived and DFA’ed; has made scarce appearances as third and fourth catcher for four years running, but isn’t actually making an impact. His .669 OPS in ’52 was by far the best of his career.
RF/LF Oscar Rivera, 27, B:R, T:R (.256, 5 HR, 20 RBI | .241, 8 HR, 32 RBI) – optioned to AAA; once a #7 prospect, and still ranked #11 when the Coons traded for him along with Willie Cruz and Eloy Sencion in a deal that keeps looking worse and worse with time. Did have some moments with the bat in an extended September campaign, but remains absolutely woeful in the field.
LF/RF/1B/CF Adam Samples, 24, B:R, T:L (.222, 1 HR, 6 RBI | .199, 1 HR, 17 RBI) – waived and DFA’ed; able defensive outfielder that can’t hit a lick.
RF/CF/LF Nick Thomason, 25, B:R, T:R (.182, 0 HR, 4 RBI | .182, 0 HR, 4 RBI) – optioned to AAA; able defensive outfielder that can’t hit a lick.

Everybody not mentioned by now has already been waived, reassigned, or turned into duck food during the offseason.

OPENING DAY LINEUP:

The main problem remains the lack of a genuine leadoff hitter, but since we have quite a few candidates for the middle of the lineup, somebody from there gets squeezed up. Pucks hasn’t really been tried at the top of the order, but he had a .377 OBP last season and isn’t going to be a road block to Lonzo should they both reach base together, so he’s going to be “it” for now, at least against right-handed pitchers. We might stick to Waters against southpaws.

Vs. RHP: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – 3B Crispin (Malkus) – P
(Vs. LHP: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – LF Crum – RF Lopez – CF Puckeridge (Perez) – C Gowin – 3B Malkus – 1B Ramsay (Philipps) – P)

Perez might bat further down, behind Gowin and Malkus. Not having a right-handed backup outfielder as well as not having a strong defensive middle infielder behind the starting pair are the main issues with the batting contingent here, and the Coons shouldn’t shy back from replacing Suzuki and/or either Crispin or Blackshire if an opportunity arises.

OFF SEASON CHANGES:

The Coons crashed from first to last for the first (and hopefully last) time in their franchise history. Consequently, much of the bullpen of horrors was purged during the offseason, and we also traded away (during the season as well) quite a few misfits that just didn’t gel with the rest, like Juan del Toro, Mitch Sivertson, and others, as well as dumping Matt Glodowski outright, and then Jesus Maldonado retired after two decades in the system.

The main addition were more of a pinpoint nature, like the odd reliever here and there, but Tony Lopez and Chris Gowin should really shore up the lineup that towards the end of ’52 really blanked out in the bottom half.

BNN really liked the changes, and the Raccoons finished third in the offseason WAR gains chart with a +6.5 final tally, depressingly not even half of what the Elks gained. It should be noted though that addition by subtraction was a major factor there; f.e. Maldo retiring alone lifted us up by a sad 1.6 WAR. The Tony Lopez deal added 2.3 WAR for the biggest improvement where we actually did something.

Top 5: Canadiens (+13.6), Gold Sox (+7.2), Raccoons (+6.5), Aces (+5.6), Capitals (+5.4)
Bottom 5: Buffaloes (-5.7), Titans (-6.0), Falcons (-6.3), Wolves (-6.4), Bayhawks (-10.2)

The remaining CL North teams ranked 6th (IND, +3.9), 9th (NYC, +1.7), and 12th (MIL, -0.4).

PREDICTION TIME:

90 wins as a baseline, huh? I don’t think I was ever as wildly off as I was with last year’s prediction. Somehow, though, the raw numbers like runs scored and allowed weren’t THAT much worse than in 2051? Somehow it seemed the Coons packed all the luck into the 2051 season, then got all the facepalms back in 2052. For illustration, we finished 5 games over our expected record in ’51, but *9* games below it last year. That’d still be a 13-game drop, but part of that was also not giving a hoot anymore in the second half and keeping guys like Argenziano in the spotlight.

Hard to say this year. The offense should be better. The rotation … has options. The pen might continue to be a giant buttache. I think .500 is possible, and perhaps even likely. If things stay together and we can perhaps swing a sly trade here or there in the summer, we might even poke our black noses above .500 by the end.

Am I delusional?

PLAYER DEVELOPMENT:

Despite my best efforts to find new prospects, the Raccoons remained in 20th place in the annual farm rankings, despite adding three ranked prospects compared to the six they had at this point last year, even though those six were quite viciously culled down to size.

For starters (pun!), #50 Seisaku Taki, #101 Phil Baker, and #127 Cameron Argenziano all exceeded rookie limits with the Raccoons as they tumbled to 95 losses. The other three are all still in the organization, though, and are also all still ranked, making for six additions to the list.

48th (-9) – AA SP Matt Walters, 22 – 2051 first-round pick by Raccoons
65th (new) – AA LF/RF David Flores, 21 – 2052 second-round pick by Raccoons
81st (new) – A SP Ramon Carreno, 17 – 2051 international free agent signed by Raccoons
98th (new) – AAA OF Nick Thomason, 25 – 2048 first-round pick by Gold Sox, acquired from Warriors with Fernando Perez, Colby Bowen for David Barel, Nick DeMarco, Paul Miles

118th (new) – A C Brian Moore, 21 – 2050 second-round pick by Raccoons
121st (new) – AA LF/RF/1B Trent Brassfield, 20 – 2051 first-round pick by Cyclones, acquired for Juan del Toro
128th (+10) – A 3B/2B Richard Anderson, 20 – 2050 supplemental round pick by Raccoons
145th (new) – ML 3B/2B/SS Dave Blackshire, 25 – 2048 first-round pick by Raccoons
198th (0) – AAA CL Reynaldo Bravo, 21 – 2047 international free agent signed by Raccoons

Bravo has now been ranked precisely #198 for three straight years, which strikes me as notable.

Finally, the top 10 overall prospects this year are:

1st (new) – LVA A OF Ken Hummel, 21
2nd (0) – MIL AA SP Tyler Riddle, 21
3rd (+23) – BOS A OF/1B Hector Weir, 18
4th (+1) – TOP AAA SP Bill Hernandez, 23
5th (-2) – SFW ML CL Ricardo Montoya, 22

6th (new) – WAS INT 3B/2B Diego Mendoza, 18
7th (new) – SAL A SP Josh Elling, 18
8th (-7) – LAP AA C Brett Hamill, 21
9th (+1) – LAP AAA SP/CL Jose Reyes, 22
10th (+1) – NAS AAA INF/LF Nick Nye, 22

Hummel was the #1 pick in the most recent draft, where Elling was taken with the #3 pick.

Mendoza is a Dominican scouting discovery the Caps made just last year. OSA is raving about him. Pat Degenhardt is unenthusiastic.

Notably, #9 prospect Jose Reyes could miss the entire season with a ruptured UCL.

That leaves five of last year’s top 10 prospects that are no longer part of that prominent group. Sometimes, that’s for good reasons, like #9 Phil Steinbacher making his debut with the Loggers and playing 101 games to bat .280 with seven homers and ending up third in the CL Rookie of the Year ranking. #8 Ernesto Rios graduated to the Scorpions where he did swingman duty for 64 innings and a 4.64 ERA, but everybody expects to him to become a full member of the rotation soon.

Nicaraguan 2B/SS Willie Acosta, last year’s #6, made the Knights’ Opening Day roster, but hit only .220 over 88 games and ended up being handed back to AAA, and was not on the Opening Day roster this year.

The Caps’ OF Carlos Mata, now 23, had a difficult time hitting AA pitching however, and ended up plunging 48 spots to #55 this year. And finally, last year’s #4 prospect, Indians outfielder Cory Oldfield hit .245 with 12 homers in single-A Birmingham, but remains there to begin another season, slipping to #20 as a consequence.

Next: first pitch.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (0-0) vs. Crusaders (0-0) – April 7-9, 2053

The bottom two teams of the 2052 CL North opened the season against each other – although the Crusaders had technically finished tied with the Loggers. They were also on a 36-year playoff drought they were unlikely to break this year, but had won the season series from the Raccoons three years in a row, with a 10-8 final tally in 2052.

Projected matchups:
Jason Wheatley (0-0) vs. Edwin Sopena (0-0)
Seisaku Taki (0-0) vs. Jim White (0-0)
Rafael de la Cruz (0-0) vs. Jeff Johnson (0-0)

This looked like a full slate of right-handers.

Game 1
NYC: SS O. Sanchez – 2B Haney – RF D. Rivera – 3B Gates – C Kissler – CF M. Ceballos – LF Caballero – 1B Carreno – P Sopena
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – 3B Crispin – P Wheatley

I sure hoped that Wheats’ first inning wasn’t a glimpse at things to come. Omar Sanchez and Mark Haney put the Crusaders up 1-0 with a pair of doubles on just three pitches, Danny Rivera walked, and Prince Gates was nailed to load the bases. Aaron Kissler’s double-play grounder plated a second run, Mario Ceballos was also drilled, but Oscar Caballero flew out to Tony Lopez to end the inning, somehow. But he wasn’t the only mess – the entire team stumbled out of the gate. Just in the first four innings, we got a Crispin throwing error, Pucks and Lonzo reaching before Waters found a double play, Tony Lopez inaugurating his Coons stint with a walk and then the next three batters all gloriously striking out, and Wheats hitting a leadoff single in the bottom 3rd, only to also be brutishly stranded. Lopez hit a leadoff single to open the fourth, then was doubled up by Ramsay’s grounder to Mark Haney. This was going splendidly.

Wheatley walked Sopena to begin the fifth, for which Haney’s homer to left was then a justified penalty, and had his day ended after five ****** innings when the baseball gods sent a dose of rain that led to a 90-minute rain delay in the bottom 5th, which cost Sopena the win in the 4-0 contest. He departed with Ed Crispin on first base, and was charged with the run when Mauricio Cuevas got rocked once play resumed. Lonzo hit a 2-out RBI single to get the Coons on the board, Waters doubled to put a pair in scoring position, and Ken Crum cashed both runs with a double down the rightfield line, narrowing the score to 4-3, but Lopez then flew out to Oscar Caballero. The Coons went to Jim Larson in the sixth, which immediately led to a New York resurgence. Aaron Kissler reached on an infield single, and Caballero doubled home a tack-on run, 5-3. Also stumbling: Ben Seiter; he walked Pucks and Waters in the bottom 7th, with a Lonzo single in between, all with one out. Ken Crum came up in that juicy spot, but was held to an RBI groundout with a roller up the middle that Omar Sanchez took to first. Travis Malkus batted for Antonio Alfaro in a #5 spot heavy for Coons debutees after Tony Lopez had been lifted for a double switch earlier; but he flew out to Mario Ceballos in center. Kevin Hitchcock pitched two scoreless after that, but the Coons still needed to make up a run to just get the game tied up. Chris Gowin had his first Critters single in the eighth inning, but was very much alone with offensive heroics of any kind; the ninth began from the top of the order against righty Ryan Sullivan. He got two outs before Waters slapped a ball past Arturo Carreno, and then Crum walked in a full count. Oh, to still have Tony Lopez batting fifth…! But it was down to Tyler Philipps as pinch-hitter, and he flew out to Danny Rivera. 5-4 Crusaders. Lavorano 3-4, 2B, RBI; Waters 2-4, BB, 2B; Lopez 1-2, BB; Hitchcock 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 1 K;

Game 2
NYC: SS O. Sanchez – 2B Haney – RF D. Rivera – 3B Gates – C Kissler – CF M. Ceballos – LF Caballero – 1B Carreno – P J. White
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – 3B Malkus – P Taki

The Coons went up in the first inning on Tuesday, with Pucks and Waters hitting singles and Danny Rivera overrunning Waters’ ball to give Pucks enough breathing room to score the first innings’ lone run on the play. That was also already it for offense for the Coons through five innings – they had no more base hits and struck out four times against Jim White, while Taki allowed a sky-high three base hits in five innings, but also whiffed eight and didn’t seem to be in trouble any time soon.

By the sixth the question was more “how soon is now?” – Taki started out by walking Omar Sanchez, nicked Rivera, and the whole ******* game dissolved into tears with a 2-run triple by Prince Gates, who would also score before the inning was over, coming home on a groundout by Ceballos after Kissler also reached by getting brushed with a pitch. One hit, three runs for New York.

Neither pitcher completed another inning; White left with an injury in the bottom 6th, and Taki got stuck in the seventh. Lillis came in with Carreno and Brandon Fellows in scoring position, two outs, and Rivera up to hit. Felix Vazquez was sent in as righty pinch-hitter, but was out easily to Ken Crum in leftfield. The Coons didn’t get another base hit until Dave Blackshire found a pinch-hit single to center with two outs in the bottom 8th and was left on by Puckeridge. Ryan Harmer walked the bags full in the ninth, but also whiffed a pair and didn’t concede a run. Sullivan did concede a run, but saved the game anyway. Waters doubled to right in the bottom 9th, scored on a wild pitch and a Crum groundout, and that was all the Coons scratched out. 3-2 Crusaders. Waters 2-4, 2B, RBI; Blackshire (PH) 1-1;

Game 3
NYC: SS O. Sanchez – LF Caballero – RF D. Rivera – 3B Gates – C Kissler – 2B Russ – CF Fellows – 1B Carreno – P J. Johnson
POR: 1B Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – CF Perez – 3B Crispin – C Philipps – P de la Cruz

Pairs of leadoff singles to begin the first and fourth innings both led to a run for New York and thus obviously a 2-0 lead. Caballero singled home Sanchez in the first, while Andrew Russ, the ********** ********, singled in Rivera for the runs. Some things never changed, like the Coons not being in a great hurry to score, and like Raffy not getting very far with his pitching. He threw 97 pitches in five innings and wasn’t seen afterwards.

While Lopez singled home Lonzo in the bottom 6th to get back to just one run behind (and thus perhaps the final score…), the Coons wanted two innings from Rule 5er Antonio Alfaro. They got one inning and the bags full with nobody out in the seventh inning. Flores came in and got a force at home from Caballero. Vazquez batted for Rivera again, so the Coons went on to Ryan Harmer. Vazquez popped out and Gates found Lonzo, and the Crusaders stranded the bases loaded. Now, if only we could get another run…! But Johnson didn’t let the bottom of the order on base in the seventh. Pucks opened the eighth with a single to center, but that tying run remained glued to the bag. Lonzo popped out, Waters grounded to short to force out Puckeridge, and Crum made another meek out. Kevin Daley made his Coons debut in the top of the ninth mostly to show him off the (thin) home crowd, gave up a leadoff single to Arturo Carreno to immediately make himself popular, and then got three outs anyhow to get out of the inning. Cuevas then was assigned the bottom 9th after having been blown up in the opener, which was interesting. The 5-6-7 were up, and Tony Lopez hit a single. Perez and Crispin made abysmal outs, though. Harry Ramsay batted for Philipps, grounded out to short, and we had a sweep on nothing but 1-run games. 2-1 Crusaders. Puckeridge 2-4; Lopez 2-3, BB, RBI;

(sigh)

Raccoons (0-3) vs. Falcons (3-1) – April 11-13, 2053

The Falcons had won three of four from the defending CL South champs from Atlanta to begin the season, scoring a league-leading 23 runs while giving up only eight themselves. They stole *12* bases (Coons: zilch). I had bad vibes. The Coons had lost six of nine against the Falcons in ’52.

Projected matchups:
Phil Baker (0-0) vs. Tyler Weems (0-0)
Victor Salcido (0-0) vs. Art Schaeffer (1-0, 0.00 ERA)
Jason Wheatley (0-1, 7.20 ERA) vs. Andy Overy (0-1, 1.29 ERA)

Left, right, left, and I had a hunch that we’d start 0-6.

Game 1
CHA: CF Sharp – 1B Tinoco – LF D. Ceballos – SS Woodrome – C Weese – RF Allegood – 2B E. Stevens – 3B Arreola – P Weems
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – LF Crum – RF Lopez – CF Puckeridge – C Gowin – 3B Malkus – 1B Ramsay – P Baker

The Coons went up 1-0 in the first this time again when Lonzo singled, advanced on a wild pitch, and scored on Ken Crum’s sac fly to Matt Sharp in center, and doubles by Chris Gowin and Harry Ramsay added another run in the second. The Falcons at that point already had three line drive singles off Baker, but had yet to break through. They did so in the fourth inning, and of course it was all quite shambolic. Ian Woodrome, Kevin Weese, and Erik Stevens reached base on a walk, single, and another walk, respectively, but crucially Juan Arreola lined out to Waters for the second out of the inning. That left it to Weems, who depressingly slapped a line drive single to left to bring home a pair of runs and tie the score at two. Baker threw a wild pitch, walked Sharp, but Adrian Tinoco grounded out to Waters to keep the game tied for the moment.

Baker held on, however, and it was still 2-2 when Lonzo hit another double to center in the bottom 6th. Crum popped out, Lopez walked, and Pucks’ 1-out single to center dropped into no man’s land and Lonzo went full ham for home, breaking the tie rather easily. Chris Gowin landed an even bigger hit, socking a double to deep left to chase home the pair on base, 5-2. The inning ended with a Ramsay double play after an intentional free pass to Malkus. Ramsay then departed in a double switch in the seventh. Baker logged two outs before departing with Danny Ceballos, Ian Woodrome, and Mike Allegood – all lefty hitters – in the next four coming up. Vic Flores got the ball, and Pucks moved to first base with Perez into center. Flores got all three lefty hitters, and Kevin Weese, too, to get through eight innings. In between, Lonzo hit a single in the seventh, and stole second base, the first bag for the entire team this year.

It had also started to rain by then, which quickly worsened to an awful dousing with driving rain in 49° weather, which led to a rain delay of over an hour. But the Coons weren’t gonna win a game this year that easily – the umps sat it out, and play resumed eventually in the bottom 8th, with Lopez having drawn a leadoff walk before the weather had gone icky. Pucks reached base as well and Ed Crispin landed a pinch-hit RBI single off Kevin Clendenen for a tack-on run. With the lead up to four, Daley remained in the shed. Jim Larson had a 1-2-3 ninth instead. 6-2 Coons. Lavorano 3-4, 2 2B; Gowin 2-3, BB, 2 2B, 2 RBI; Crispin (PH) 1-1, RBI; Baker 6.2 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 3 BB, 6 K, W (1-0);

Hey, hey, a win!

And now – Salcido. (frowns)

Game 2
CHA: CF Sharp – 1B Tinoco – LF D. Ceballos – SS Woodrome – C Weese – RF Allegood – 2B E. Stevens – 3B Arreola – P Schaeffer
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – 3B Crispin – P Salcido

Salcido walked two and struck out three in the first inning, making things interesting from the get-go; Sharp and Ceballos also pulled off a double steal, but were left on when both Woodrome and Weese whiffed. Pucks hit a leadoff single in the bottom 1st, went, and was caught stealing, and it ended up the first time all year nobody scored in the first inning of a Critters game. The second? Salcido walked one more and whiffed another three (…!), while the Coons got Crum, Ramsay, and Gowin on base with a single and two walks. Crispin batted with one out, coaxed another walk out of Art Schaeffer, and that pushed home Ken Crum for a 1-0 lead. That was all; Salcido whiffed and Pucks flew out to left.

Matt Sharp struck out to begin the top 3rd, which made for ten batters not to put the ball in play against Salcido to begin the game. Tinoco did, grounding out, and Ceballos did, singling to left-center, but was stranded when Woodrome grounded out. Bottom 4th, Pucks batted again with a pair (Gowin, Crispin) in scoring position and two outs, and this time came through with a single over the head of Woodrome and a ways into left-center for a 2-run single, 3-0. Lonzo grounded out, keeping it at 3-0, but so did Salcido, throwing 107 pitches in six shutout innings, *somehow*. Malkus batted for him and drew a 2-out walk with Crispin already on base in the bottom 6th, which brought up Pucks with two outs for the third time in a row, but this time he rolled over to Erik Stevens to strand another pair.

Relief after Salcido was smooth with scoreless and harmless innings from both Hitchcock and Lillis to get through eight. This time, nobody tacked on for Portland, so Daley came out for his first save attempt for the team in the ninth inning, facing the 4-5-6 batters. Weese singled to left, bringing up Stevens, too, but Pucks hustled in to snatch Stevens’ soft 2-2 looper to shallow right and ended the game with a catch on the move. 3-0 Critters. Puckeridge 2-4, 2 RBI; Crispin 2-2, BB, RBI; Salcido 6.0 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 3 BB, 9 K, W (1-0);

Game 3
CHA: CF Sharp – 1B Tinoco – LF D. Ceballos – SS Woodrome – C Weese – RF Allegood – 2B E. Stevens – 3B Arreola – P Overy
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – LF Crum – RF Lopez – CF Puckeridge – C Gowin – 3B Malkus – 1B Philipps – P Wheatley

Icky weather was back on Sunday, and while Matt Waters finally got the Coons into the home run column with a leadoff jack in the first inning, the weather soon turned sour and sent everybody into a 50-minute rain delay in the middle of the third inning, with Wheats still up 1-0. Through three there were a hit, two walks, three strikeouts, and a throwing error on his ledger, and he returned to the mound after the Coons didn’t amount to much in the bottom 3rd, but walked Ian Woodrome to begin the inning. Woodrome kindly got himself caught stealing, but Weese also walked. Mike Allegood flew out to center, and after some crisis intervention on the mound, Wheats struck out Stevens, although it was doubtful, whether he’d A) get through five, and B) with the lead.

Overy retired the Coons in order in the bottom 4th, which didn’t help with B at least, but Wheatley also got through the 8-9-1 batters without issue in the fifth, striking out Sharp. That put him on 89 pitches though, and he would not return for the sixth. Mikio Suzuki batted for him, but grounded out. Flores (two outs) and Larson (four) kept the lid on the 1-0 squeezer through the next two innings, before we got ANOTHER 50-minute rain delay out of the seventh-inning stretch. We still didn’t get a cheap one called, and instead Lillis blew it in the eighth against Sharp and Ceballos, who roped liners for a single and RBI double, respectively. Ceballos stole third base, and scored on a Woodrome sac fly to give the Falcons the lead.

Blackshire, batting for Harmer, who got out of the miserable inning, and Lonzo then went to the corners with one out in the bottom 8th against righty Josh Clem. Crum struck out, and Lopez grounded out to strand the runners. Hitchcock kept the Falcons close with a 1-2-3 ninth inning, while the Coons were up against Paul Crisler in the bottom of the inning. The right-hander had been traded to Charlotte as the main piece for Chris Gowin, who was due to bat second in the inning. He grounded out, just like Pucks had done to start the inning. Harry Ramsay batted for a hitless Malkus and hit a single to center, with Perez batting for Philipps next, and dropping a single into shallow left. Ed Crispin batted for Hitchcock – the last bat off the bench. He flew out to Ethan Whitehead in centerfield…. 2-1 Falcons. Gowin 2-4, 2B; Ramsay (PH) 1-1; Perez (PH) 1-1;

In other news

April 8 – TOP SP Kennedy Adkins (1-0, 1.04 ERA) takes a no-hitter into the ninth inning in his first start of the year, but gives up singles to CIN 1B/LF/RF Rich de Luna (1-for-1, 0 HR, 0 RBI) and INF Juan Ojeda (1-for-4, 0 HR, 0 RBI) and ultimately a run in what turns out to be an incomplete 2-1 win.
April 9 – The four-time champs from Denver will have to go five without SP Gary Perrone (1-0, 1.59 ERA), who leaves his Opening Day start with an injury and is diaganosed with a torn flexor tendon that will keep him out for the entire season.
April 9 – WAS C Mitch Korfhage (.714, 0 HR, 6 RBI) collects five hits, including three doubles, and drives in three runs in the Caps’ 16-inning, 12-8 win over the Miners.
April 9 – The Loggers have only two base hits, and only one in regulation, but beat the Canadiens, 1-0 in 10 innings. MIL 2B/SS Ricky Lopez (.143, 0 HR, 1 RBI) opens the bottom 10th with a triple and scores on a wild pitch by Vancouver’s Ruben Mendez (0-1, 3.86 ERA).
April 10 – NYC SP Jim White (1-0, 0.00 ERA) could miss the entire season with a torn rotator cuff.
April 10 – Indians INF Alex de Castro (.385, 0 HR, 7 RBI) drives in half his team’s runs in a 12-5 win over the Titans, and all from the #8 spot.
April 13 – WAS SP Bruce Mark jr. (1-0, 2.12 ERA) pitches nine innings of 2-hit ball, whiffing eight… but nobody scores until the 13th inning in the Capitals’ 2-1 win over the Warriors and he’s left with a no-decision.
April 13 – SFW SP Omar Lara (0-1, 3.72 ERA) will miss the entire season to have a stretched elbow ligament retightened.

FL Player of the Week: WAS C Mitch Korfhage (.556, 0 HR, 8 RBI)
CL Player of the Week: TIJ OF Dustin Ransford (.458, 1 HR, 6 RBI)

Complaints and stuff

Not the start we hoped for. Well. Second-fewest runs allowed, that’s something. But we are hitting .212/.292/.289 as a team, which needs no further elaboration. One homer. One stolen base. Somehow, 17 runs scored isn’t even bottoms in the league.

0-4 in 1-run games. That’s almost funny.

Almost.

At least nobody has torn out a leg so far…!

Next week: road trip to the Thunder and damn Elks. Which doesn’t bode well.

Fun Fact: The Raccoons have four times as many rain delays this season as they have hit home runs.

I don’t think there’s much to add to that.

Except more homers.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (2-4) @ Thunder (2-4) – April 14-16, 2053

The Raccoons entered with a +3 run differential, but the same record as the Thunder and their -8 run differential. They had bled runs like crazy during Opening Week, with a 7.07 ERA on their rotation. That would surely tug itself back to a sensible value soon, so could the anemic Raccoons score a few runs before that happened? We had not won a (regular, tee-hee) season series from the Thunder in six years, going 4-5 in 2052.

Projected matchups:
Seisaku Taki (0-1, 4.05 ERA) vs. Alfredo Llamas (0-1, 18.90 ERA)
Rafael de la Cruz (0-1, 3.60 ERA) vs. Zach Boyer (1-0, 2.57 ERA)
Phil Baker (1-0, 2.70 ERA) vs. Mike Zeigler (1-0, 6.43 ERA)

Two right, one left, and probably not seven runs per game for the Raccoons…

Game 1
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – 3B Malkus – P Taki
OCT: LF R. Cox – 2B Ban – SS Soberanes – 1B Worthington – RF Harmon – 3B R. Sifuentes – C Adames – CF M. Allen – P Llamas

Nope, the offense remained inept. A Lonzo single was the only hit the first time through, and Ken Crum hit a double in the fourth, but also got himself caught in a rundown halfway to a triple and nobody actually batted with a runner in scoring position until Chris Gowin walked in the fifth, was singled to third base with two outs by Taki, and was then stranded when Pucks floated out for the third out of the inning. The Thunder weren’t that much better; in fact, both teams had three base hits for no runs through five innings. Taki walked Mike Harmon in the bottom 4th, but also picked him off first base again, the first time a Critter had managed that in 2053.

Lonzo hit another leadoff single in the sixth, but was forced out by Waters’ grounder up the middle. The Coons didn’t reach scoring position until Tony Lopez snuck a 2-out single past Ed Soberanes, a feat soon replicated by Harry Ramsay for a 2-out RBI single as Waters scampered around to score. Gowin grounded out, keeping it at 1-0, a score Taki held through seven and two thirds innings before he was knocked out by consecutive 2-out singles to center by Ryan Cox and Jonathan Ban. The Coons went to Kevin Daley right away in a double switch that was already becoming familiar, with Daley in the just-cleared spot of Ramsay, and Pucks moving in to first base as Perez took over center. Perez still couldn’t catch up with Soberanes’ drive to center that fell for a game-tying double, and Taki remained winless, but at least didn’t lose as David Worthington struck out. Daley hung around for the bottom 9th in a 1-1 tie, but allowed straight singles to begin the inning – to Harmon, Ramon Sifuentes, and Jesus Adames. Three on, no outs, no hope? Mike Allen struck out. Luke Burnham grounded to short, with Lonzo firing home to strike down Harmon. Ryan Cox grounded to the right side, where Pucks intercepted the ball and tossed it to the rushing Daley – who dropped the ball, allowing Cox to reach base and the Thunder to walk off. 2-1 Thunder. Lavorano 2-4; Taki 7.2 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 4 K and 1-3;

Seven games into the season, we’re 0-5 in one-run games, and I am already counting the days to the offseason. That’s the spirit!

Game 2
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – 3B Crispin – C Philipps – P de la Cruz
OCT: LF R. Cox – 2B Ban – SS Soberanes – 1B Worthington – RF Harmon – 3B R. Sifuentes – C L. Burnham – CF M. Allen – P Boyer

A leadoff walk drawn by Pucks and a pair of RBI singles by Waters and Lopez gave the Critters a quick 2-0 start and many questions about how Raffy would bungle that one. A homer to left by Ramon Sifuentes, whom the Thunder had really, really, really wanted to not be a Thunder anymore this year, in the bottom 2nd was a nice start, cutting the lead in half, but Pucks peskily drew another leadoff walk and Lonzo doubled to left-center to put a pair in scoring position with nobody out in the third inning. Enter the 12-for-79 middle of the order, who all made outs – but at least Waters and Crum both hit sac flies to get the damn runners home for a 4-1 lead. Pucks and Lonzo were on base again in the fifth inning, but only reached scoring position as a duo once Waters grounded out. The Thunder walked Crum with intent, Lopez struck out, and Ramsay grounded out to strand a full set.

Raffy managed to throw 52 pitches in three innings despite allowing only the Sifuentes homer for base hits. He walked a pair – but both were wiped on double plays, and I honestly didn’t have a ******* clue how he kept exploding his pitch count like that. The next three (and Raffy’s last three…) innings saw no Thunder runners beyond Mike Allen reaching on a shy single, and yet that still took him another 46 pitches, giving him 98 in total. Oh well. At least we were still up 4-1…

Make that 4-3 on another Sifuentes homer (…) in the bottom 7th. Jim Larson walked Harmon, then was taken quite deep by Sifuentes for his third homer of the year, and the second in this bloody game. Hitchcock folded as well in the eighth, walking Doug Clevidence in the #9 hole before conceding the tying run on Ban and Soberanes singles. (sigh!) The game just had to keep collapsing from there, didn’t it? Ryan Harmer got the ninth in a tied game, but pretty quickly untied himself from the burden of pitching with a walk to Luke Burnham, and a walkoff homer served up to Marco Ochoa. 6-4 Thunder. Lavorano 2-5, 2B;

Second career homer for the 29-year-old OF/3B Marco Ochoa, who had all of 31 career at-bats to his name.

(exasperatedly waves with all paws)

The Elks were not expected to send a left-handed pitcher against us on the long weekend, so the Raccoons took every left-handed batting regular (Pucks, Ramsay, Crispin (sorta)) out of the lineup against Zeigler on Wednesday. Same for switch-hitting Ken Crum, who led the team with 6 RBI, but not with a .103 batting average. The remaining regulars would get days off during the Elks series.

Game 3
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – C Gowin – RF Lopez – LF Perez – 1B Philipps – CF Suzuki – 3B Blackshire – P Baker
OCT: LF R. Cox – 2B Ban – SS Soberanes – 1B Worthington – RF Harmon – 3B R. Sifuentes – C L. Burnham – CF M. Allen – P Zeigler

More superficially decent, but really inefficient pitching then from Baker, who allowed just two hits to the Thunder, but also walked four amidst many long counts and needed 101 pitches through six innings, and that was already it for him. On the bright paw, he didn’t allow a run, and when Travis Malkus batted for him to begin the seventh inning, he left with a 2-0 lead, courtesy of four straight 2-out singles by Lopez, Perez, Philipps, and Suzuki, the latter two grabbing their first RBI’s of the year, in the sixth inning and virtually nothing else. Malkus singled and Waters walked, but Lonzo hit into a fielder’s choice before Gowin grounded into a double play altogether… The Raccoons boldly stole two innings with Rule 5 pick Alfaro then before handing off the ball to Daley in the ninth. He walked Ed Soberanes to begin the inning, but Worthington hit into a double play and Mike Harmon ended the game with a comebacker to Daley. 2-0 Blighters. Suzuki 3-4, 2B, RBI; Malkus (PH) 1-1; Baker 6.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 4 BB, 5 K, W (2-0); Alfaro 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

Raccoons (3-6) @ Canadiens (2-5) – April 17-20, 2053

Yes, yes, kids – the Raccoons were not even in last place at this point – the dismal Elks were! Now, granted, it was early and they had yet to get into the Coons-bashing for the year, which they did 13 out of 18 attempts last season. They had conceded the third-fewest runs in the CL so far (but had also played the fewest games), but ranked absolute bottom in runs scored, with just *13* markers on the board in seven games. I guess that’s where we come in.

Projected matchups:
Victor Salcido (1-0, 0.00 ERA) vs. Juan Ramos (1-0, 2.45 ERA)
Jason Wheatley (0-1, 3.60 ERA) vs. Juan Arrocha (0-1, 4.50 ERA)
Seisaku Taki (0-1, 2.51 ERA) vs. Mario Godinez (0-1, 4.70 ERA)
Rafael de la Cruz (0-1, 2.45 ERA) vs. Terry Herman (1-1, 2.84 ERA)

Only right-handers; no Damian Moreno either, with the runner-up in ROTY voting (to Taki, tee-hee!) in 2052 being off to the DL with a sprained wrist already.

Game 1
POR: RF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – CF Perez – 3B Malkus – P Salcido
VAN: C Julio Diaz – SS Mullen – 2B Aparicio – RF K. Hawkins – CF Burkhart – 1B Wheeler – LF T. Turner – 3B Guillory – P Ju. Ramos

Salcido struck out four the first time through the order again, but also gave up a home run to Tony Aparicio and a triple to Tim Burkhart, who scored on Tim Turner’s sac fly for a 2-0 lead for the damn Elks by the second inning. I opened a bottle of Capt’n Coma right away and dug myself deeper into the trusty brown couch in the office, even though Maud protested that we’d still get a visit from our insurance agent. Why’d that be a problem, Maud? – Will the ballpark’s premiums go up just because I sit here, bsss, with my tail rings disheveled, and cuss out the suckers playing baseball in the frozen tundra, wrongly?

37-year-old Juan Ramos retired the first eight Critters in order before getting taken deep by Victor Salcido, which I admit made me snicker. Not for long though – the next Coons hit to leave the infield (Pucks hit an infield single after the Salcido homer, but was stranded) was a single by … Salcido, and led nowhere, because the rest of the team was in a collective coma. Crum walked and Ramsay singled with two outs in the sixth, but Kyle Hawkins easily caught a fly to right by Chris Gowin to strand the two runners. The score remained 2-1 through six, with Salcido whiffing up eight Elks against four hits, but I somehow couldn’t shake the impression that he looked like dog poo on the mound. Maybe he was pitching so awfully, none of the pro batters up there had seen anything like it since high school, and that was catching them off guard.

Top 7th, a Perez single, stolen base – two for the year, and the whole team, yay! – and then a bad throw on a Malkus grounder for FL veteran Landon Guillory put runners on the corners with nobody out. The Coons had Salcido bat and whiff, but Pucks then hit a fly to deep center that stretched away from Tim Burkhart for an RBI double, tying the score at two. Malkus scored on a passed ball charged to Julio Diaz, but none of the following batters could do anything with the other runner in scoring position… and when Salcido resumed pitching, he put Jeff Wheeler and Adam Magnussen on the corners and before long gave up a pinch-hit, score-flipping, wallbanger double to Kenny Leon, 4-3. After his exit, stage left, Vic Flores nailed Diaz with an 0-2 pitch, and Jim Larson gave up another 2-run double to Dan Mullen. 6-3 Canadiens. Puckeridge 2-5, 2B, RBI; Perez 2-4, 2B;

What a team. What a bunch!

Game 2
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – C Gowin – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – 3B Crispin – 2B Malkus – P Wheatley
VAN: 1B Wheeler – SS Mullen – 2B Aparicio – RF Magnussen – CF Burkhart – LF T. Turner – 3B K. Leon – C Julio Diaz – P Arrocha

Offense remained poor on either side to begin the Friday game; both teams had only one base hit in the first three innings, and when Ken Crum and Tony Lopez rolled a pair of shy singles through seams on the infield with two outs in the fourth, and Harry Ramsay followed that up with a loud smack, he did so on the ground and right at Jeff Wheeler for the third out in the inning. Dan Mullen then opened the bottom 4th with a single to left. Aparicio walked in a full count, and Magnussen ripped an RBI double to right. Oh well, here we – oh, no wait… - yep, Burkhart with a 3-piece to right-center. And that was another ballgame.

(grabs Honeypaws tighter and sheds a few tears)

The Coons answered with three in the fifth inning; Crispin and Malkus reached base leading off before being bunted onwards by Wheats. Pucks struck out, which was to my great dismay, but Lonzo drove in the runners with a single to center, reached second on Burkhart’s throw to home plate, then scored on Gowin’s single to left. Crum also singled, and so did Lopez, but of course Gowin was then thrown out at home plate to end the inning… The game lingered from there until Jim Larson got the ball with one out and nobody on in the bottom 7th and loaded the bases with gross ineptitude. Vic Flores replaced him with three on and two out and whiffed Magnussen to bail out of the jam. Ken Crum’s 1-out double put the tying run in scoring position in the eighth inning against Leo Iniguez, but Lopez grounded out and Waters, batting for Ramsay, did the same trick. It was still a one-run game in the ninth inning against Bernardino Risso, but now we had the bottom of the pack come up and there was no reason not to dive deeper into this bottle of throatburn here. The southpaw flew out Blackshire, but walked Malkus, which put the tying run on board. Philipps pinch-hit for the pitcher, hit a fly to left, and ancient ex-Coon Mike Preble flubbed the ball for an error. Oh come on, boys! But now…! Pucks at the plate! And a drive to right! Get up! Get up! Get up! The stupid thing didn’t get up, but it clanked off the fence for an RBI double, which tied the game and delayed defeat for the time being. Lonzo’s sac fly and a Gowin single even made it a 6-4 lead for Daley to mess with! … And messing he did. Gave up a homer to Julio Diaz right away, then walked Preble, and Wheeler, too. Dan Mullen ended the farce with a 3-piece over the fence in left. 8-6 Canadiens. Lavorano 2-4, 3 RBI; Gowin 2-5, 2 RBI; Crum 3-5, 2B; Lopez 2-4;

Why?

Why?

Just… Why?

Game 3
POR: CF Puckeridge – 3B Crispin – SS Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – C Philipps – 2B Malkus – P Taki
VAN: 1B Wheeler – SS Mullen – 2B Aparicio – RF Magnussen – CF Burkhart – LF Turner – 3B Guillory – C Julio Diaz – P Godinez

I didn’t pay much attention to the game at first because I was busy building a good team out of baseball cards in a box full of bubblegum that Steve from Accounting had brought from the nearest store. None of the cards had ratings, so I just went by which cards had the most sparkle effects on them. None of the Coons’ cards sparkled particularly much. Ramsay homered for a 1-0 lead in the second inning, though, and Taki looked sharp through three innings, but Mullen singled and two walks filled the bags in the fourth, even though Tim Turner’s pop and Landon Guillory’s groundout kept the bases loaded. Less luck in the fifth then; Wheeler and Mullen went to the corners with singles, and Tony Aparicio uncorked another one of those 3-run homers that everybody raved about, but the concept was rather foreign to our team…

The Aparicio homer was in fact *it*. Yeah, yeah, it was enough to beat the Raccoons, but it was also his 2,500th career base hit in the majors. The 38-year-old was picking his spots, it seemed. Taki pitched another two scoreless innings in vain, Hitchcock had a 1-2-3 eighth, but the Raccoons could never get their heads removed from their own buttholes and went down entirely meekly. Ramsay had three hits, or more than the rest of the position players combined… 3-1 Canadiens. Ramsay 3-4, HR, RBI; Taki 7.0 IP, 7 H, 3 H, 3 R, 2 BB, 8 K, L (0-2);

I don’t know, Slappy, I like this one. (shows a reddish-orange “All Star” card of Ed Soberanes) – You think the Thunder still wanna get rid of him?

Game 4
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – RF Lopez – 3B Blackshire – P de la Cruz
VAN: 1B Wheeler – SS Mullen – 2B Aparicio – RF Magnussen – CF Burkhart – LF T. Turner – 3B Guillory – C Julio Diaz – P Herman

Pucks opened Sunday with a double, and locking knees with Dan Mullen upon sliding into second base – Mullen was fine, but Pucks limped off with a bum knee and was replaced with Suzuki. As far as starts to a game went, this was pretty dismal, but the Coons made the most out of it. Lonzo singled home Suzuki, then stole second. Crum then plated him with a 1-out single. Ramsay reached and with two outs, Tony Lopez unleashed a 2-run single to left-center for a 4-0 opening to proceedings, give or take a one-legged outfielder. Raffy had a quick first inning, but by the second walked Magnussen and Burkhart out of the gate, which was far from ideal. Tim Turner found a double play and Guillory struck out, but I saw the writing on the wall already.

But maybe for once he would be fine *and* lengthy? The Elks needed a full run through the order after that just to get their first hit, a Guillory single, and remained 4-0 behind through five innings, and yes, that also meant our offense went home right in the middle of the first. Or maybe it didn’t? Crum opened the sixth with a single off Herman. Ramsay grounded out, Gowin walked, and Tony Lopez added a run with another single. Blackshire was walked intentionally and Herman shanked, after which the pen continued to concede base hits in a massive meltdown, even after de la Cruz struck out. After that, the Raccoons hit a staggering SEVEN singles in a row to explode the score to 12-0 before Blackshire flew out to center after battling Leo Iniguez for 11 pitches…!

From there, several regulars were taken out by the seventh-inning stretch, although the early injury had already reduced the bench to four bums. More astoundingly than the dozen runs was perhaps that Raffy was still pitching in the late innings, needing 96 pitches through eight innings. Now, that was pretty close to his efficient limit, but with a 12-run lead he’d at least get a shot at it, because why not? Actually – Suzuki singled home Crispin in the ninth against right-hander Ben Arner, so the lead was 13 runs by the time Raffy returned to the mound for the top of the order. Second base runner ends his day – Wheeler ran a full count, but struck out on the sixth pitch. Mullen was more cooperative, grounding out to Crispin at third base on just one pitch. Tony Aparicio had the audacity to draw a walk, which brought up ex-Coon Pat Gurney in the cleanup spot. He got cleaned up on strikes! 13-0 Furballs! Puckeridge 1-1, 2B; Suzuki 2-5, 2 RBI; Lavorano 3-6, 3 RBI; Waters 2-4, RBI; Crum 3-4, BB, 2 RBI; Gowin 2-3, 2 BB, 2B; Lopez 4-5, 4 RBI; de la Cruz 9.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 4 BB, 7 K, W (1-1);

In other news

April 15 – CHA SP Chris Jones (1-0, 2.40 ERA) throws a 3-hit shutout in an 11-0 rout of the Canadiens.
April 15 – The reigning FL Player of the Year, NAS 1B Alejandro Ramos (.200, 0 HR, 1 RBI) will miss at least a month with a broken finger. Ramos, 33, batted .320 with 39 homers in 2052.
April 16 – DEN 2B/3B Ivan Villa (.525, 5 HR, 10 RBI) is sure hot to start the season. In the Gold Sox’ 5-4 win over the Cyclones, he blasts three solo home runs, including the 11th-inning walkoff shot off CIN MR Adam Bates (0-1, 40.50 ERA).
April 16 – The Loggers trade RF/LF/1B Chris Lowe (.250, 0 HR, 1 RBI) and cash to the Capitals for MR Franklin Diaz (0-0, 0.00 ERA, 1 SV) and #185 prospect INF/LF Teo de Kok.
April 18 – Capitals OF Neville van de Wouw (.378, 1 HR, 7 RBI) has a 20-game hitting streak that began in 2052 after a solo home run in a 4-2 win over the Buffaloes.
April 18 – The Titans beat the Loggers, 6-5 in 14 innings; both teams score exactly one run in the same inning three times in this game, including once in extras.
April 19 – The Buffaloes whip the Capitals, 10-3, and also end the hitting streak of Neville van de Wouw (.354, 1 HR, 7 RBI) right then and there at 20 games.

FL Player of the Week: DAL RF/LF/1B Dario Martinez (.444, 6 HR, 16 RBI), hitting .462 (12-26) with 3 HR, 10 RBI
CL Player of the Week: OCT 3B/1B Ramon Sifuentes (.356, 4 HR, 11 RBI), swatting .545 (12-22) with 3 HR, 7 RBI

Complaints and stuff

First, the good news – no structural damage to Pucks’ knee, and with a day off on Monday he might only miss one game. But yes, my big black googly eyes were wet for a few hours.

Second, second career complete game, first shutout for Rafael de la Cruz, 22 years old! It was his 57th start in the major leagues. Maybe, one day, I’ll look back and know that it was right to turn down 90 trade offers for him in the late 40s.

I mean we won three rings anyway, how much better could it have gone by trading him…?

We also have a +8 run differential while being bottoms in the division, which was hard to explain to the Salvadoran cleaning lady, who didn’t know anything about beisbol, and I didn’t know what the Salvadoran national sport was after all. Cockfights?

The Coons had Monday off, then would start a homestand with the Arrowheads, Condors, Bayhawks, and Crusaders to take them right into May.

Fun Fact: Tony Aparicio has a 12 All Star Game participations, and if he keeps facing the Raccoons some more, he’ll make it 13 this year despite turning 39 before the month will be over.

While he spent his last few years in the FL, he played with the Falcons for more than a decade. He never led the league in an offensive category, actually, but has a Gold Glove and a few Platinum Sticks while hitting .289/.391/.437 with 240 HR and 1,289 RBI.

Fun Fact (Bonus Round): Liam Wedemeyer hit three home runs in a game for the Gold Sox in 1995.

That was his only season in Denver, batting a brutal .287 with 31 bombs. The Coons showed interest and traded for the 26-year-old Australian after the 1995 season, which also brought in Tzu-jao Ban. Wedemeyer promptly led the CL in home runs in both 1996 (33) and 1997 (24) while everything around him collapsed. Then he collapsed himself, batting a pathetic .195 with 12 homers and 32 RBI in 1998 while also being injured. His OPS plunged 250 points within two years. The Coons let him walk, and so did everybody else, his career in the ABL ending at age 28.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (4-9) vs. Indians (7-5) – April 22-24, 2053

The wicked Raccoons returned home to host the Indians and then a myriad of other teams, starting on Tuesday. Indy arrived without outfielder Mike Roberts, who was out with a concussion, which was going to take a bit out of the #2 offense after the first two weeks. They had a +16 run differential (Coons: +8, snort!) while also ranking fourth in runs allowed. They had smacked the Raccoons last year, taking 13 of 18 games.

Projected matchups:
Phil Baker (2-0, 1.42 ERA) vs. James Powell (1-0, 2.40 ERA)
Victor Salcido (1-1, 3.65 ERA) vs. Thomas Turpeau (1-0, 4.91 ERA)
Jason Wheatley (0-1, 4.50 ERA) vs. Enrique Ortiz (1-1, 2.42 ERA)

Turpeau was the only left-hander in the rotation there.

Game 1
IND: 2B N. Fernandez – CF A. Mendez – C Poindexter – 1B B. Quinteros – 3B B. Anderson – RF S. King – LF Hare – SS de Castro – P J. Powell
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – C Gowin – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – RF Lopez – CF Perez – 3B Crispin – P Baker

When you were also wondering for reasons why you’d skip Phil Baker or Victor Salcido with the off day offering itself on Monday, the Indians casually pounded Baker for five runs in the opening inning to probably set the tone for the series. It was hard to watch. Four hits, two walks, with the key piece a 2-out, bases-clearing double for Josh Hare to jump the score to 4-0 before he was also singled home by Alex de Castro. The inning only ended with Powell, who quickly made for the hills with the win – at least until an hour-long rain delay in the fourth inning intervened. By then, Baker was long purged, having given up another RBI single to de Castro in the third inning and been hit for with a so-so Pucks, who singled, but was left on base. Nick Fernandez, Angel Mendez, and Bill Quinteros all hit singles off Antonio Alfaro in the fourth inning for a seventh Indians run. The bright side? I wouldn’t have to fuss about being .308 with a positive run differential much longer.

Alfaro erred through three innings of garbage relief, relieving like garbage, with two walks and a hit batter, but no more runs, which still beat Ryan Harmer’s outing in the seventh inning. He walked Hare to begin things, then misfielded de Castro’s roller for an “infield single”, which meant de Castro owed the official scorer a beverage of his choice. Powell – still going! – bunted to third base, but Crispin flung the ball away for two bases and a run. Fernandez popped out, but Harmer walked Mendez, then was shanked. Vic Flores gave up a sac fly to Manny Poindexter, but got Bill Quinteros to ground out to end the dismal inning. The runs were unearned. Three hits (two in the field and one into Josh Hare’s bum) off Jim Larson tacked on an earned run in the eighth inning, but the Raccoons rallied for a run in the bottom 8th, as Chris Gowin doubled home Lonzo… who had reached on a clumsy error by Philip Locke in rightfield. And that was the amount of offense the Critters put out. 10-1 Indians. Puckeridge (PH) 1-1; Malkus (PH) 1-2;

Now, blowout loss here, blowout loss there, but the real concern for me was having the bullpen drained like that and Salcido on the mat to go next. I figured that sending Wheats ahead – which would put him on regular rest thanks to the off day, was probably the smarter bet.

Still no Pucks in the lineup, partially because of Turpeau.

Game 2
IND: 2B N. Fernandez – CF A. Mendez – C Poindexter – 1B B. Quinteros – 3B B. Anderson – RF S. King – LF Locke – SS de Castro – P Turpeau
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – C Gowin – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Philipps – CF Perez – 3B Malkus – P Wheatley

So of course Bill Quinteros hit a 2-piece off Wheats right in the first inning after Angel Mendez had already triple. Lonzo walked (!), stole second, and was singled home by Ken Crum in the bottom 1st, and Lonzo was nicked the second time ‘round and stole second again, probably out of spite, but then was stranded by Gowin.

…and Wheats didn’t pitch *badly*, but he sure wasn’t any good either, and the Arrowheads found another run in the fourth inning on two singles and a walk, de Castro bringing home Quinteros with a 2-out hit. The Raccoons then loaded the bases in the bottom 5th with two outs and in unearned fashion, with Crum having Wheats (error), Waters (walk), and Gowin (single) ahead of him on the bases. He grounded out crummily. Gowin’s single was the second hit for the team in this game, and also the last for a Critter while Wheatley was pitching, which was until the stretch, and the team remained 3-1 behind into the bottom 8th, where Tony Lopez slapped a single off Bill McMichael to get a 2-out runner on base. And then Tyler Philipps struck out against right-hander Rich Knowles. Lillis and Hitchcock held the line for the Raccoons after Wheatley’s departure, while David Williams got the ninth for Indy. Perez struck out. Suzuki grounded out. Pucks batted for the pitcher and singled with two outs, bringing up Matt Waters as the tying run…! Matt Waters struck out. 3-1 Indians. Puckeridge (PH) 1-1;

(silently looks at what the waiver wire has to offer)

Game 3
IND: 2B N. Fernandez – CF A. Mendez – C Poindexter – 1B B. Quinteros – 3B B. Anderson – RF S. King – LF Hare – SS de Castro – P En. Ortiz
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – 3B Blackshire – C Philipps – P Salcido

Like Wheats on Wednesday, Salcido got taken deep in the first inning for two runs on Thursday, albeit it being Angel Mendez doing the honors. The Raccoons only got Philipps on base the first time through, but Matt Waters whacked a homer in the bottom 4th to narrow the gap to 2-1. It was his second of the season, and the team’s third…

With Salcido somehow holding up despite giving up three hits in the first inning – he didn’t allow any hits the next four innings after that – the Raccoons actually got a chance to take the lead (!!) in the bottom 5th. Ramsay led off with a single to center, and Dave Blackshire put a ball into right-center, that fell for a double between Mendez and Scott King. Thus, the tying and go-ahead runs were in scoring position with nobody out… and the battery coming to the dish. The Arrowheads for weird reasons walked Philipps intentionally, then had Ortiz dangle a 2-2 pitch to Salcido that got ticketed over Nick Fernandez for a game-tying RBI single. But before you get all hysterical, mind the three on, nobody out situation on paw here. Pucks flew out to left, with Blackshire barely making it to home plate for a sac fly rather than a double play, and Ortiz nicked Lonzo with a 1-2 pitch to refill the bases for Waters, who whiffed. Crum popped out, and three remained stranded…

Like Wheats, Salcido went seven, and with a lead, too! He nicked Quinteros and walked Hare in the sixth and seventh, respectively, but neither runner made it far, and the Raccoons remained up 3-2 at the stretch. Perez batted for him in the bottom 7th, singled, and combined with Philipps’ leadoff double that gave the Coons runners on the corners with the top of the order approaching. Three strikeouts would get Ortiz out of the inning, although Lonzo snuck an RBI single into that sad procession, preventing me from going completely insane. – Cristiano, if you have a cough, talk to Dr. Padilla.

Then, the scheduled implosion. Fernandez singled off Hitchcock, Poindexter singled off Flores, and with the runners on the corners, so did Quinteros. He singled to right, Tony Lopez tried to boop Poindexter before he’d reach third base, but the throw was WAY off line, Blackshire had to chase after it, and the tying runs both came home, with the go-ahead run into second base. Bother. Ryan Harmer walked the bags full before Pucks managed to intercept a de Castro drive to end the inning, stranding a full set, and Kevin Daley pitched a scoreless ninth outside of a save situation, even though a double play helped with that. Perez in the #9 hole led off the bottom 9th against lefty Joe Nix, and somehow hit a double to center, so the winning run was 180 feet away. Oh this was gonna be good! Malkus batted for Pucks, because lefty, and made an out to second baseman Jared Kenner. Lonzo grounded out to short. The winning run was still on third base for Waters. …who grounded out to first.

Only boozing helped anymore here (and barely). Daley, who was far from overused, delivered a 1-2-3 in the 10th inning, then, sitting in Crum’s deserted spot, was hit for with Gowin to begin the bottom of the tenth against Nix. The Coons went in order, but Jim Larson held the Indians scoreless after that. Blackshire began the bottom 11th against David Williams, grounded to short, and de Castro tossed it away for two bases, putting the winning run on second base again. Philipps, who could not be replaced anymore, struck out. Perez was walked intentionally, but Suzuki flew out easily in the #1 spot. Lonzo with two outs? Lonzo to center! A single! And Blackshire was coming around, and the Coons walked off…! 5-4 Critters. Lavorano 2-5, 2 RBI; Philipps 2-4, 2B; Perez (PH) 2-2, BB, 2B; Salcido 7.0 IP, 3 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 5 K; Daley 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 2 K;

Now only 1-5 in 1-run games! Hah!

Take that, rotten luck!

Raccoons (5-11) vs. Condors (10-6) – April 25-27, 2053

Had the Coons and Condors actually ever been good at the same time? I struggled to remember. Coming in, Tijuana was sixth in runs scored and tied for second in runs allowed, with a +12 run differential (Coons: -2). Their rotation was mediocre, but their pen had yet to surrender much of anything. The Condors had not won the season series from the Raccoons in *eight* years, with a 5-4 Critters win in 2052, and three out of the last four years.

Projected matchups:
Seisaku Taki (0-2, 2.95 ERA) vs. Tony Llorens (1-1, 4.91 ERA)
Rafael de la Cruz (1-1, 1.35 ERA) vs. Aaron Erwin (1-1, 5.02 ERA)
Phil Baker (2-1, 4.60 ERA) vs. Nick Young (1-1, 3.38 ERA)

The Condors would send southpaws to bookend this series, with a lone right-hander in between.

Game 1
TIJ: CF Ransford – LF Marroguin – 2B C. Navarro – C Mittleider – 1B E. Rodriguez – 3B Whitehurst – SS Medlock – RF Blackburn – P Llorens
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – C Gowin – LF Crum – RF Lopez – CF Puckeridge – 3B Malkus – 1B Ramsay – P Taki

Llorens sat the Critters down in order the first time through, while Taki allowed a walk to Jordan Marroguin and a single to Elias Rodriguez, although the latter got himself caught stealing. A Gowin single and a Crum double with two outs in the bottom of the fourth saw the Raccoons almost threaten to break out, but thankfully Tony Lopez was available to strike out and strand the runners in scoring position… An inning later, Pucks drew a leadoff walk, then reached third base when Malkus singled. The corners, and nobody out, and Ramsay whacking away at the first pitch, and into the left-center gap with the stupid thing for an RBI double…! Taki chimed in with an RBI single when he realized that some of his teammates actually were still playing along with him, and another run came home on Lonzo’s groundout for a 3-0 lead, which with the way the Condors had looked in the first five against Taki felt treacherously good. A 2-out blooper by Dustin Ransford that fell behind Lonzo in the top 6th marked only their second hit of the game, and the Coons answered with two more runs as Malkus drove home Crum and Pucks in the home half of the sixth.

But Taki ran out of juice. With two outs in the seventh, Elias Rodriguez doubled over Pucks’ glove and then scored on a Nathan Whitehurst single through the left side. In the eighth, a pinch-hit homer by Danny Hildebrand got the Condors another run closer, 5-2. Flores and Larson then replaced Taki to get out of the inning. That remained the score by the time the ninth inning began. Daley had thrown 30 pitches the day before, and Hitchcock had been out two days in a row. The Raccoons went to Lillis, but I closed my eyes. Malkus’ error on Jon Mittleider’s grounder got a runner on base, but Rodriguez struck out, yet that was also the only lefty hitter that Lillis could hope to face here. Whitehurst was next, grounded sharply up the middle, but Lonzo had smelled that one and had come over two steps while Lillis offered the pitch – and that move ended the game when he was able to snatch the skidder for a 6-4-3 double play. 5-2 Raccoons. Crum 1-2, 2 BB, 2B; Puckeridge 1-2, 2 BB; Malkus 2-4, 2B, 2 RBI; Taki 7.1 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 3 K, W (1-2) and 1-3, RBI;

Back-to-back wins! Fifth place! Will wonders ever cease!?

Yes, Maud, I’ll take my calm pill.

Game 2
TIJ: CF Ransford – SS Chapa – 2B C. Navarro – C Mittleider – 1B E. Rodriguez – 3B Whitehurst – LF Marroguin – RF Lamotta – P Erwin
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – 3B Crispin – P de la Cruz

Of de la Cruz’ first 11 pitches, 10 were balls, and the 11th was put in play for a double by Luis Chapa, loading the bases with nobody out to begin the game. After our grumpy old pitching coach went out and gave him a good kick in the bum for readjustment, he got Mittleider to pop out and struck out the next two, conceding no runs. I then got to count four Coons – Crum, Ramsay, Crispin, and Pucks – to hit a ball to the warning track inside the first three innings. Invariably, they were all caught by an outfielder. Crum singled softly to right in the fourth to get the team into the H column at all, but was of course stranded.

Raffy meanwhile was his old young self, a.k.a. a bit of a mess. He threw 74 pitches in five innings, conceding two hits and four walks, but kept the linescore tidy at the same time. He was then 3-1 behind Elias Rodriguez in the sixth inning before nailing him in the chest, which was not much better than walking Jordan Marroguin outright with two outs. Ricky Lamotta, briefly a Coon some years back, kindly grounded out to Crispin to end the inning. Erwin then walked Pucks opening the home half of the sixth. I feared more agony, but a wild pitch moved Pucks to second base. Lonzo then popped out, which was getting us closer to agony. Waters flew out, but Crum snuck an RBI single past Whitehurst for the first run in the game. Raffy took the lead, retired the opposing pitcher, and then called it a day. Lillis finished the seventh for him, but Hitchcock got bopped with a Chris Navarro single and Rodriguez’ RBI double in the eighth to tie the game back up. Sigh.

Bottom 8th, Perez pinch-hit in the #9 hole again and singled again off Jake Hill, so maybe he’d pinch-hit in the #9 hole more often now; it seemed to be the only way to get him on base. Pucks lined out, Lonzo grounded out, Waters walked, and Crum rolled another RBI single past Navarro now to reclaim the lead. Suzuki hit for a hitless Lopez, but flew out to Ransford to strand the pair.

That lead, too, was then blown by Daley, who allowed a single to third-sacker Stephen Medlock, walked Chapa, and then fell to a 2-out triple by Navarro. Mittleider singled home Navarro, and I was biting into my clench fist hard enough to have the taste of blood in my snout. The Coons were too stunned / **** to amount to a comeback against Dale Mrazek in their turn in the ninth inning… 4-2 Condors. Crum 3-4, 2 RBI; Perez (PH) 1-1;

That above? Those four hits? Those are ALL the team had.

Game 3
TIJ: LF Marroguin – SS Chapa – 2B C. Navarro – C Mittleider – 1B E. Rodriguez – 3B Whitehurst – CF Hildebrand – RF Lamotta – P N. Young
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – C Gowin – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – 2B Malkus – 3B Blackshire – P Baker

Honestly – not quite sure whether Baker finished exploding on Tuesday. He walked two and allowed two hits the first time through the Condors order and only escaped runs on his ledger for Nick Young to jam into a double play with the bases loaded to kill the second inning, then came to the plate himself after Young had walked the 7-8 batters to begin the bottom 3rd, and crapped out trying to bunt, striking out instead. Pucks grounded out, which would have made for a run with a good bunt, but Lonzo recovered the situation and cashed both runners from scoring position by cramming a sharp grounder through the hole between Chapa and Whitehurst that Blackshire had to leap over when he almost ran into it; but both scored on the Coons’ first hit of the game, and Lonzo stole second and came home on a Gowin double, 3-0, before Crum struck out to end the inning.

Marroguin drove home Lamotta as the Condors packed two hits into the fifth inning, and thus narrowed the score to 3-1 as Baker kept tip-toeing around the volcano. Things kept being dicey. Navarro singled to begin the sixth, and Malkus fumbled a Rodriguez liner that was already in his mitten for an error to put a second runner on base. Lillis was readied to come in for Hildebrand, but by then Whitehurst had bounced into a 5-4-3 double play to kill the inning. Baker then somehow also got through the 7-8-9 batters himself, finishing his day with 108 pitches at stretch time. Waters hit for him to begin the bottom 7th, but the team didn’t get on base in the inning until Lonzo doubled with two outs, then was left on by Gowin grounding out to short. There were thus just two innings left for the pen to fumble a 3-1 lead, but Harmer got them off to a good start, walking Marroguin to begin his inning and giving up a run on a Navarro double, 3-2. With two outs, Flores replaced him against Rodriguez, threw a wild pitch, and gave away the score-flattening single. Also soul-flattening, but what am I evmmm-mmbll-(talks into a bottleneck)

Young was still holding out, but Crum hit a leadoff double in the bottom 8th. Lopez and Philipps coaxed walks to fill the bases with nobody out, with Carlos Castillo, a left-hander, inheriting the sticky situation. Malkus flew out to center at 2-2, and with a sense of urgency Ken Crum went for home, but was thrown out by Hildebrand in an 8-2 double play. The remaining runners moved up, but Blackshire grounded out anyway… Daley held the game tied in the ninth this time, and then Perez batted for him in the #9 hole against the southpaw Castillo as we hoped for more magic, but he grounded out to Medlock at short. Lonzo singled with two outs, stole second, and was left ******* stranded by Gowin to send the game to extras, where we had to resort to Alfaro, who hadn’t pitched since the last time Baker had started a game. I shoved the bottleneck deeper into my snout. A Ransford single, Mittleider double, and Rodriguez single plated two runs for the Condors to break the tie immediately, after which Dale Mrazek insisted on walking three Raccoons in the bottom 10th, with Crum, Lopez, and Malkus all reaching. Not included: Philipps bumbling into a 6-4-3 double play like a ******* moron. Useless Ed Crispin batted for useless Dave Blackshire, and drew a fourth walk, loading them up for Perez, who had taken over center from Pucks – and was hit in the ribs by a 96mph missile. That one hurt, but also forced in a run. Mikio Suzuki then hit for Alfaro, the last bat off the bench. He singled to left! Malkus scored to tie the game and Crispin … – WHERE THE **** IS CRISPIN?? Did he forget there’s two outs???? The bags remained full for Lonzo with two outs, who had four hits on the day and would surely – strike out.

(giggles)

Jim Larson took the hill and the #1 spot then, retired three on six pitches in the 11th, and sat down three more on eight pitches in the 12th. By two outs in the 13th, Whitehurst singled off him and Brian Blackburn found a double. Lamotta drove home both of them, and things continued to collapse, as Medlock reached on a walk, Ransford hit an RBI single, and so did their ******* RELIEVER, Ramon Montes de Oca. The Raccoons chose not to discuss the matter any further. 10-5 Condors. Suzuki (PH) 1-1, RBI; Lavorano 4-7, 2B, 2 RBI; Baker 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 6 K;

In other news

April 22 – The Loggers beat the Crusaders, 18-16 in regulation. Milwaukee’s rookie Perry Pigman (.389, 2 HR, 12 RBI) has five hits, one a double, and four RBI, while on the losing side NYC C Aaron Kissler (.255, 1 HR, 6 RBI) has three hits, a home run, and drives home five runs.
April 22 – The Condors beat the Knights, 2-0 in 10 innings, after neither team manages to score in regulation.
April 22 – The Scorpions move OF/1B Pedro Leal (.265, 2 HR, 6 RBI) and cash to the Scorpions for MR Ralph Needham (0-1, 4.26 ERA) and #66 prospect CL Chance Crawford.
April 23 – Buffaloes and Blue Sox play 16 innings before the latter notch a 2-1 walkoff on a triple by 3B Ricky Jimenez (.154, 0 HR, 1 RBI) and a single hit by 22-year-old OF/1B Edwin Flores (.158, 0 HR, 4 RBI).
April 25 – Dallas SS/3B Alex Adame (.417, 0 HR, 8 RBI) dishes out two doubles, three singles, and drives in three runs in a 13-3 rush of the Rebels. The Stars put the game away right away with an 11-run first inning.

FL Player of the Week: SFW C Nick Samuel (.270, 3 HR, 12 RBI), batting .370 (10-27) with 2 HR, 9 RBI
CL Player of the Week: NYC C Aaron Kissler (.286, 4 HR, 14 RBI), swatting .409 (9-22) with 4 HR, 13 RBI

Complaints and stuff

This week’s Raccoons home run was hit by Matt Waters. As every week, we’ll now draw a lucky winner of a Nunley 6500 Pro BBQ in Raccoons brown among all the season ticket holders that correctly picked Waters. (Cristiano Carmona gigglingly turns the crank that makes the transparent plastic sphere with dozens and dozens of paper slips spin round and round until he gets slapped on the paw by the GM) – Here we go. (opens the sphere and picks a ticket) – Congratulations, Betty Sue Kowalski from The Dalles, Oregon!

Isn’t it nice that we can have at least one lucky winner every week?

Yeah yeah, Larson and Taki also won games this week. But nobody on this team seems to be particularly lucky.

Or good.

If you have three third baseman, and together they are hitting approximately .138 with negative six RBI, shouldn’t you just purge not just one or two, but all three of them? One big potato sack, and into the Willamette with them! Although they’re probably too crap to even sink…

Next week: Baybirds, Crusaders. And hopefully a delivery from One-Eyed Jack, because I struggle to drink the dark thoughts away with Capt’n Coma alone, and Maud has hid the gooey blue sink rinse…

Fun Fact: Lonzo leads the team in stolen bases, hits, runs, RBI, and all the slash categories for a merely decent 112 OPS+.

I’m sorry, little Lonzo, it’s not enough. You’ll have to carry them harder!

[Westheim]

Raccoons (6-13) vs. Bayhawks (7-11) – April 28-30, 2053

Neither of these teams had grabbed a great start… or even a good start… or one that filled you with confidence that you could reach the end of the season before going completely insane. The Baybirds were in the bottom four in both runs scored and runs allowed, with the second-worst rotation by ERA (5.10), and a -21 run differential (Coons: -6). Acquisition Brent Cramer was on the DL already, but they were hitting .261 and had the most homers in the CL with 15 (Coons: 3…), so they were probably due some better luck on offense. San Francisco had won the season series last year, five games to four.

Projected matchups:
Jason Wheatley (0-2, 4.30 ERA) vs. Ricky Garcia (0-2, 11.70 ERA)
Victor Salcido (1-1, 3.26 ERA) vs. Bob Ruggiero (0-1, 6.50 ERA)
Seisaku Taki (1-2, 2.83 ERA) vs. Milt Cantrell (2-1, 2.48 ERA)

Garcia was a 33-year-old Cuban southpaw that had spent the majority of his career as a swingman for the Pacifics. Not a bad pitcher per se – I totally expected Wheats to cash another 2-1 loss. The others were right-handed.

Game 1
SFB: 2B Montoya – CF G. Cabrera – RF Munn – 1B Witherspoon – LF D. Diaz – C M. Torres – SS Waldman – 3B A. Diaz – P R. Garcia
POR: 2B Waters – SS Lavorano – C Gowin – 1B Crum – RF Lopez – LF Puckeridge – 3B Malkus – CF Suzuki – P Wheatley

Armando Montoya and Gil Cabrera went to the corners with leadoff singles to start a new week, but the latter was caught stealing and the former was stranded with a K to Danny Munn and a groundout by Sam Witherspoon, who in the past had always enjoyed having some coon schnitzel for dinner. The Coons also opened with a pair of singles in the bottom 1st, and Gowin walked, so the bags were full with nobody out. I marked an L in my pocket schedule, but the Raccoons actually plated all three runners; two on Crum’s double to right, and one more on a Pucks groundout.

Of course, Wheatley had the plague and didn’t get the win – but not because the Bayhawks scored off him. He pitched on those two early hits into the fourth inning, but then had to consult with Dr. Padilla and left the game. I whimpered and whined, but it didn’t help – Wheats was out and Alfaro was in, logging the next six outs before conceding a run on hits by Rob Waldman and Gil Cabrera in the sixth. Lillis then entered in a double switch, parking Tony Lopez, to retire Munn and get out of the sixth. He didn’t get out of the seventh, however – Marv Torres and Waldman socked 2-out hits, and Lillis also felt a tweak and left with Dr. Padilla as well. I giggled, but only after I pulled a plastic bag over my head. This time Lonzo left in a double switch to get Ryan Harmer on the mound, and he struck out left-handed pinch-hitter Pedro Colon to end the inning and also dodged the Bayhawks in the eighth. The ball went to Hitchcock in the ninth because Daley had been out two days straight and with rather mixed success. So, Hitchcock got a K on Munn, then loaded the bags with a Witherspoon single (pinch-running: Greg Medina), a Danny Diaz single, and a pinch-walk offered to Nick Roseto. Exit Hitchcock, enter Vic Flores for the left-ha-… or right-handed former Coons farmhand Adam Peltier. He struck out, Colon grounded out, and SOMEHOW the Coons snuck away with a costly win. 3-1 Raccoons. Crum 2-3, BB, 2B, 2 RBI; Malkus 1-2, 2 BB; Wheatley 3.2 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K;

No, Chad. (rearranges the Coons mascot’s wooden cubes with letters on the faces) P-Y-R-R-H-I-C. – It means it cost a lot more than it was worth. – Like Tony Lopez.

(Tony Lopez looks up from his food bowl, visibly dismayed)

No diagnosis was available for Lillis by Tuesday, but Wheats was off to the DL with a biceps strain. There was hope that he’d be back within 15 days. The Coons called up right-hander Mike Snyder to aid the torched pen. No game was played on Tuesday thanks to abundant rain, and a double-header scheduled for Wednesday, but that brought no clarity on Lillis’ injury, and little clarity in terms of the skies. The Coons flipped Taki and Salcido for the double-header, having the better guy go first, but the Baybirds kept Ruggiero in the Wednesday opener.

Game 2
SFB: 2B Montoya – CF G. Cabrera – RF Munn – 1B Witherspoon – SS Peltier – C M. Torres – LF P. Colon – 3B Waldman – P Ruggiero
POR: RF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – CF Perez – 1B Ramsay – C Philipps – 3B Crispin – P Taki

Witherspoon doubled off Taki to open the second inning, but was stranded amid five strikeouts in the first three frames for the reigning Pitcher and Rookie of the Year, who also had to give himself a lead, finding Tyler Philipps on second base with two outs in the bottom 2nd and hitting the most terrible duck snort into no man’s land in shallow left-center that ended up with three defenders converging and then scaring each other off, allowing Philipps to score the game’s first run. Bottom 4th, Harry Ramsay tied Matt Waters for homers on the team when he hit his second (…) to right, 2-0. Pucks joined the party with a leadoff jack the inning after, that one to left, and Lonzo narrowly missed, but hit a triple high off the fence. Waters popped out, Crum walked, and Perez whiffed (he had already whiffed to strand a pair on the corners in the first inning), but Ramsay was up to the task and slugged a double into the leftfield corner, scoring both runners to go up 5-0. Ruggiero was over, and Zachariah Alldred restored order by popping out Philipps. While Taki continued to click off Bayhawks batters mostly without issue, Ramsay would come back to the plate in the eighth, needing a triple for the cycle, but struck out against esteemed ex-Furball Victor Merino. Taki got to the ninth well short of 100 pitches, and got Cabrera and Munn with flies to Pucks, then had to wrestle Witherspoon to a full count before completing what he started with a strikeout. 5-0 Furballs! Ramsay 3-4, HR, 2B, 3 RBI; Taki 9.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 9 K, W (2-2) and 1-3, RBI;

Shutout on 99 pitches! Second shutout of his career, but the seventh complete game in 38 starts. What a horse!

Yes, Victor, all the relievers are still available for the second game. – Don’t you get any funny ideas here!

Game 3
SFB: 2B Montoya – CF G. Cabrera – RF Munn – 1B Witherspoon – SS Peltier – LF D. Diaz – C A. Mercado – 3B A. Diaz – P Cantrell
POR: 2B Malkus – LF Puckeridge – SS Waters – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – RF Lopez – CF Suzuki – 3B Blackshire – P Salcido

Again, both teams’ first two batters in the first inning landed hits. The Bayhawks settled for one run on a Witherspoon groundout, but Harry Ramsay was greedy and whacked a 3-run homer to right. The home team then apparently considered this a job well done, because they got only one other base hit through the completion of six innings, and that guy – Gowin – was immediately doubled up by the next wet towel in line. Salcido held the 3-1 score through seven, although he made sure to keep leaking the odd single and especially long flyout here and there just to keep me queasy. Mikio Suzuki singled to begin the bottom 7th, then was doubled up by Blackshire, while Salcido was hit for by Lonzo, but his fly to left was caught by Danny Diaz.

Bottom 8th, Malkus singled over Peltier to begin the inning, then stole second, and reached third base when the ball bobbled away from Peltier. Pucks walked, and a wild pitch and a Waters double both plated a runner. Ramsay was walked intentionally, and the inning fizzled out after that, but the Coons completed the sweep…! 5-1 Critters. Malkus 2-4; Ramsay 1-2, 2 BB, HR, 3 RBI; Salcido 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 6 K, W (2-1);

While that sweep was exciting and all, the Coons also got news that Brett Lillis jr. was out with a torn rotator cuff and would perhaps not return before September, if that. Suddenly needing a lefty, the Coons brought up Eric Reese from AAA, but we couldn’t exactly be sure that this was a tenable solution… Reese had pitched to a 5.40 ERA in the majors last year.

There were also only four starters on the roster; the off day on Thursday allowed us to go into the weekend with an extra reliever, however, but we’d have to sort out the roster by Tuesday.

Raccoons (9-13) vs. Crusaders (13-8) – May 2-4, 2053

The Crusaders tied for the lead in the North and had no time to play games with the Coons – they needed the wins. They were third in runs scored and sixth in runs allowed, and had already swept the Critters to start the season.

Projected matchups:
Rafael de la Cruz (1-1, 1.03 ERA) vs. Mauricio Cuevas (3-1, 3.38 ERA)
Phil Baker (2-1, 3.57 ERA) vs. Jeff Johnson (2-1, 5.01 ERA)
Seisaku Taki (2-2, 2.15 ERA) vs. Dave Washington (1-2, 4.78 ERA)

Cuevas was filling in for an injured Jim White, who was probably out for the year. Washington would give us a Southpaw Sunday.

Game 1
NYC: SS O. Sanchez – LF Caballero – RF D. Rivera – 3B Gates – C Kissler – 2B Haney – CF Fellows – 1B Carreno – P Cuevas
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – CF Puckeridge – 2B Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – RF Lopez – C Gowin – P de la Cruz

Raffy kept himself busy with putting a pair of Crusaders on in each of the first three innings, and although they also stole two bases, they scored only a lone run, on Prince Gates’ RBI double that chased home Oscar Caballero in the first inning. Omar Sanchez was caught stealing third base in the third inning, and there was a double play grounder hit by Brandon Fellows in the second to sabotage their efforts. The Coons took a 2-1 lead in the bottom 1st with Lonzo reaching and Pucks hitting a 2-piece to right, then got Waters, Crum, and Ramsay all on to begin the bottom 4th – the dreaded full house, no outs situation. To everybody’s stunning amazement, they scored a whole bunch; Tony Lopez hit a sac fly, but both Gowin and Malkus got singles, plating another three runs on top of that for a 6-1 lead…!

Raffy then promptly croaked by loading the bags with two outs in the fifth with three long at-bats to the 1-2-3 batters that ended in two walks sandwiching a Caballero single, only for Prince Gates to line out to Ken Crum on another 2-0 pitch and stranding absolutely everybody. Instead, hits by Pucks, Waters, and Ramsay added another run in the bottom 5th, while the next half-inning saw three more long at-bats for Aaron Kissler and Mark Haney, who walked both, a K to Brandon Fellows, and finally a first-pitch double-play grounder by Arturo Carreno, whom I remembered EXACTLY like that! That was the end of Raffy, who walked SIX in a 7-1 game that somehow felt like a budding L, all the while Pucks added another run by plating Malkus with a groundout against lefty Josh Jansen in the home sixth.

Jim Larson, last seen being turned inside-out in the 14th inning on Sunday, then got the ball for the seventh, walked Andrew Russ, the miserable ****, to begin his outing, but Russ was caught stealing and the Crusaders kept stumbling over their own feet. Reese got three groundouts in the eighth inning, but Ryan Harmer got three base runners out of four batters faced, of which he walked two, in the ninth inning. Vic Flores had to don pants for *that*, gave up a run on an Omar Sanchez sac fly, and another on Caballero’s 2-out single, but popped out Danny Rivera to get the game over with. 8-3 Coons. Lavorano 2-4; Puckeridge 2-4, HR, 2B, 3 RBI; Ramsay 3-4, 2B, RBI; Gowin 2-3, BB, RBI;

Game 2
NYC: SS O. Sanchez – CF M. Ceballos – RF D. Rivera – 3B Gates – C Kissler – 2B Haney – LF Caballero – 1B Carreno – P J. Johnson
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – CF Puckeridge – 2B Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – RF Lopez – C Gowin – P Baker

Baker got on the snout as soon as he had tied his shoes; Sanchez and Mario Ceballos hit singles, and Rivera’s sac fly made it 1-0 in the first, which continued through another four Crusaders hits and four Crusaders runs, most of the hits being quite sharp and loud. Baker only pitched three innings, giving up two more walks and in between an RBI triple to Caballero in the top 3rd before leaving without batting and down 6-0. Jeff Johnson retired the first seven, then retired generally few of the next seven. Chris Gowin homered to get the Coons on the board – also his first in brown – and a Blackshire double and Malkus single narrowed the score to 6-2. Pucks drove in another run, and Matt Waters homered to left-center, 6-5. Crum walked and Ramsay reached with an infield single before Tony Lopez’ drive to left was nice to look at, but snatched by Caballero near the line, narrowly keeping New York on top.

Caballero also gave the Crusaders some breathing room again, singling home a pair that Mike Snyder, the useless punk, walked to begin the fifth inning. He walked another three Crusaders in the sixth before getting shafted. Jim Larson had Mark Haney at 0-2 before allowing a 2-out drive to deep right, but Tony Lopez – Gold Glover if nothing ******* else – remained on top of that ball and ended the inning with a grab on the move. The Stupid Corps kept digging the hole deeper – Harmer was pitching in the seventh, walked Caballero to get going, and then put on Carreno and Sanchez with defensive misplays, once throwing to the wrong base, and then throwing past everybody with a hat and a glove on the next comebacker. He, too, was kicked off the mound in anger, but Hitchcock gave up a 2-run double to Ceballos anyway. Reese then got the ball in a double switch with the clear intention to pitch the last two innings on garbage duty. He gave up a two walks, three hits, and another two runs in the eighth right away, and issued another walk in the ninth. The Crusaders pen, however, pitched quietly and efficiently, and quelled every threat before it could become a whole thing for five scoreless innings… 12-5 Crusaders. Malkus 2-5, RBI; Blackshire (PH) 1-1, 2B;

New York had 12 hits, 12 walks, and 12 runs. The Coons had … well, nine walks tied up in Snyder (10.80 ERA) and Reese (6.00 ERA), who were both swiftly disposed of, along with Ryan Harmer (10.29 ERA). Big cuts!

Three other ho-hum pitchers were added from AAA: Raul Medrano, Eloy Sencion, and Steve Watson, that toss-in in the Tony Lopez trade.

Y’know, the one that walked everything with and without legs.

Game 3
NYC: SS O. Sanchez – CF M. Ceballos – RF D. Rivera – 3B Gates – 2B Haney – LF Caballero – C Skelly – 1B Carreno – P Washington
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – CF Puckeridge – RF Lopez – 1B Ramsay – C Philipps – P Taki

Taki touched his ERA to a whisker under two with three scoreless to begin the game on Sunday, but also bunted into a double play after Philipps had reached base to begin the bottom 3rd, which then continued with the 1-2-3 batters all filling the bases against Washington. The left-hander ran a full count against Ken Crum and appeared to nip the corner with a sinker that Crum didn’t poke at – but the ump didn’t poke either and Crum, after looking back uncertainly, tossed the stick and made for first base as the Coons took a 1-0 lead, while the New Yorkers were up in arms. Pucks popped out to shallow center to strand the full set, but Crum got another RBI the next time up, grounding out to bring home Travis Malkus from third base, 2-0 through five.

Taki looked like the thing was in the bag through five, offering three hits against five strikeouts. Mario Ceballos then hit a long drive in the sixth that Pucks caught, but which made me wish we’d lead by another run or three more. If only someone on the brown team would oblige! Bottom 6th: Philipps was on base again, and Taki had another bad bunt, this time with an out at second base, but Taki was on with two outs. Washington walked Malkus, then got ahead on Lonzo before hanging the 1-2 pitch. Lonzo huah-bomf!ed the ball well over the 386’ marker in left-center for a 2-out, 2-strike, 3-run homer, and the Coons were up 5-0 …!

Alas, a shutout was not in play this time – technically Taki was going on short rest, and he was starting to miss his spots in the seventh, although the Crusaders didn’t even get on base in that inning, or the next. The Coons were however not going to chance it and lifted him after eight. Also, Philipps reached base again to begin the bottom 8th, and wouldn’t it be nice to not remove him right away, time and again? Suzuki singled, but then Malkus hit into the double play to continue the perpetual Curse of the Travis. Eloy Sencion retired the Crusaders on three grounders in the ninth to grab the series. 5-0 Coons! Lavorano 3-5, HR, 3 RBI; Philipps 2-2, 2 BB; Suzuki (PH) 1-1; Taki 8.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 5 K, W (3-2);

In other news

April 28 – 13 innings, zero runs in the Condors-Indians game, before both teams score in the 14th. The visiting Condors prevail, 2-1, on a 2-out, 2-run single by reliever Carlos Castillo (2-0, 3.21 ERA).
April 29 – DEN 2B/3B Ivan Villa (.411, 7 HR, 18 RBI) could miss the entire month of May with elbow inflammation.
April 30 – With two hits in an 8-7 win over the Condors, IND LF/RF/1B Bill Quinteros (.362, 7 HR, 18 RBI) has landed a base hit in every game this season, except Opening Day, or in other words, he had a 20-game hitting streak.
May 1 – OCT SP Alfredo Llamas (3-1, 3.06 ERA) not only defeats the Loggers in a 13-2 rush, but also goes unretired at the plate, 3-for-3, and hits a grand slam off MIL SP Noah Hollis (1-2, 8.77 ERA).
May 2 – Warriors SP David Concha (4-1, 2.23 ERA) hurls a 3-hit shutout to beat the Gold Sox, 1-0
May 2 – As if that wasn’t enough, the Gold Sox also lose LF/CF Sandy Castillo (.306, 1 HR, 16 RBI); the 32-year-old would be out at least two weeks with a case of back soreness.
May 4 – Rebels SP Pablo Paez (0-4, 6.92 ERA) would miss a month with a strained hamstring.

FL Player of the Week: DAL 3B Randy Wilken (.320, 6 HR, 27 RBI), batting .355 (11-31) with 3 HR, 10 RBI
CL Player of the Week: LVA 3B/SS Jeremy Welter (.337, 4 HR, 23 RBI), hitting .522 (12-23) with 1 HR, 11 RBI

FL Hitter of the Month: SAL RF/LF/1B Salvador Montecino (.388, 7 HR, 22 RBI)
CL Hitter of the Month: IND LF/RF/1B Bill Quinteros (.362, 7 HR, 18 RBI)
FL Pitcher of the Month: SAC SP Sean Sweeton (4-0, 2.10 ERA)
CL Pitcher of the Month: ATL SP Matt Weber (3-0, 1.71 ERA)
FL Rookie of the Month: NAS SS/2B/RF Jake Groff (.268, 1 HR, 11 RBI)
CL Rookie of the Month: MIL LF/RF Perry Pigman (.354, 3 HR, 16 RBI)

Complaints and stuff

No Player of the Week for 17 shutouts innings for Taki?? – Maud, we need to call League HQ immediately! – Yes, while I’m still yelling!

First winning week of the season, although I hear the state attorney general is investigating a bunch of fuzzy creatures committing necrophilia on some out-of-state birds. The Bayhawks now had the worst record in the league, and the Coons had something remotely resembling a pulse after a 5-1 week against them and the Crusaders.

Taki had 17 shutout innings and is a delight to watch, but mind-bogglingly it’s de la Cruz, always on the verge of getting yanked in the fifth, who leads the entire league with a 1.11 ERA.

Baseball is wicked, unpredictable, eats little kids, and makes no sense.

Why is Travis Malkus batting leadoff? Well, best OBP on the team, and he even got that batting average over .200 now. It’s not *great*, and he’s not exactly quick ahead of Lonzo, but we’re 4-1 with him leading off. By that logic, we’re also 4-1 since Wheats went on the DL.

It’s also the first time we’re 4-1 since the commencement of the President Mathers administration.

It’s off to the slightly-right-of-center part of the continent now, with a week spent with the Loggers and Cyclones. After that is a 3-day visit home to get murdered by the Gold Sox, and then another 4-city trip out East (mostly).

Fun Fact: 76 years ago today, during the league’s inaugural season, Ben Simon hit three home runs as the Raccoons dropped the Loggers, 9-4.

He was the first ABL hitter ever to hit three homers in a game.

Maud? – How old *am* I…??

[Westheim]

Raccoons (11-14) @ Loggers (8-16) – May 5-8, 2053

The bottom two in the CL North faced off for four games in Milwaukee to start the new week, and the Loggers had some issues, to put it mildly. They ranked ninth in runs scored (ahead of the Coons, mind), but were absolute bottoms in pitching, giving up a staggering 5.6 runs per game with a battered rotation, murdered bullpen, and gruesome defense. So here were probably a few 2-1 wins coming for them. The Loggers also won the season series last year (gulp!), 10-8.

Projected matchups:
Victor Salcido (2-1, 2.73 ERA) vs. Josh Costello (1-2, 5.03 ERA)
Cameron Argenziano (0-0) vs. Noah Hollis (1-2, 8.77 ERA)
Rafael de la Cruz (2-1, 1.11 ERA) vs. Noel Groh (0-3, 4.68 ERA)
Phil Baker (2-2, 5.26 ERA) vs. John Morrill (2-1, 3.90 ERA)

All right-handers coming up here. Argenziano was not on the roster yet, but would be activated on Tuesday at the expense of a reliever to be determined.

Game 1
POR: CF Puckeridge – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – RF Lopez – 3B Crispin – C Philipps – P Salcido
MIL: LF Pigman – 2B R. Lopez – SS Z. Suggs – RF Callaia – CF Steinbacher – 1B Haracz – C C. Thomas – 3B J. Rodriguez – P Costello

The game was scoreless through five innings – (pause for expressions of bewilderment, genuine or otherwise) – with the Coons amounting to all of two base hits by Lonzo and Crum, both of whom were forced out by the next guy in line, in Waters’ case even in double play fashion. Salcido was looking alright, but with a scary bit in the fourth inning when Gaudencio Callaia hit a 2-out triple up the rightfield line. Phil Steinbacher walked and stole second base after that, but Dale Haracz went down on strikes to end the inning. Top 6th, the bags were full o’ Critters after a leadoff single for Tyler Phillips, a walk for Pucks, and Lonzo being hit in the box by an errant breaking ball. Waters batted with one out, struck out, and dropped under .200 for the year, while Ken Crum sloshed the first pitch he got over Ricky Lopez and into shallow right-center for a 2-out, 2-run single, the first markers on the board. Ramsay drew another walk, while Tony Lopez, also batting under .200 by now, struck out to leave a full set. Salcido pitched seven scoreless before the Loggers hit some hard balls off Vic Flores and Kevin Hitchcock in the eighth, but all for outs. It remained 2-0 in the top 9th, as Loggers lefty Jeff Fox struck out Blackshire, Lopez, and Malkus in order, but Kevin Daley had a 1-2-3 inning himself to put the game away. 2-0 Blighters. Crum 2-4, 2 RBI; Salcido 7.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 5 K, W (3-1);

Raul Medrano was returned to AAA without pitching and the Coons activated Cameron Argenziano to cover the fifth spot in the rotation until Wheats would come off the DL, which would probably mean two starts, Tuesday and Sunday. He had gone 1-6 with a 4.33 ERA for the Coons last season, and 1-2 with a 2.21 ERA in AAA this year.

Game 2
POR: 2B Malkus – SS Lavorano – RF Puckeridge – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – C Gowin – CF Suzuki – 3B Blackshire – P Argenziano
MIL: LF Pigman – 2B R. Lopez – SS Z. Suggs – CF Steinbacher – 1B Haracz – C C. Thomas – RF de Lemos – 3B J. Rodriguez – P Hollis

The Coons went up 1-0 in the third inning by ways of Argenziano hitting a leadoff single himself and scoring after a Lonzo single and Pucks’ neatly placed groundout. Lonzo stole second in between there, but was left stranded by Ken Crum. The Loggers tried to answer right away; Ricky Lopez hit a 1-out triple off the fence in right, and Zach Suggs drew a walk before Steinbacher struck out. Argenziano nailed Haracz in a full count to give himself full bases, but survived Chris Thomas’ grounder to the right side, which Malkus played for the third out. Harry Ramsay took over the team lead in homers with his fourth, a leadoff jack *in* the fourth, although the Loggers clawed that run back with *another* triple, that one by Dave de Lemos to begin the home fourth. Travis Malkus answered with a leadoff triple over Steinbacher’s head in the fifth inning, and was immediately cashed by Lonzo with a sac fly to de Lemos in deep right.

The game remained busy, as Argenziano drilled Zach Suggs to begin the bottom 5th, which sugged. Steinbacher grounded to short for a force at second base, then was caught stealing, so things still worked out in the inning. The Coons then got Suzuki and Blackshire on with two outs in the sixth, but kept batting their pitcher and ran into the third out with a fly to Perry Pigman. This greed backfired immediately, as Argenziano put Thomas and Jose Rodriguez on base in the bottom 6th, then fell to a game-tying triple by … Noah Hollis. He wasn’t seen after that, while Steve Watson in his Raccoons debut conceded the go-ahead run with a 2-out single by Suggs, which sugged, after whiffing Pigman and walking Lopez, and a pinch-hit, 2-run homer by Gaudencio Callaia off Jim Larson put the game away in the inning after… 6-3 Loggers. Malkus 2-4, 3B; Ramsay 2-4, HR, RBI; Blackshire 2-4, 2B;

Game 3
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – RF Puckeridge – 2B Waters – 1B Ramsay – LF Crum – CF Suzuki – C Gowin – P de la Cruz
MIL: LF Pigman – 2B R. Lopez – SS Z. Suggs – RF Callaia – CF Steinbacher – 1B Haracz – C C. Thomas – 3B J. Rodriguez – P Groh

The Coons scored before they made an out as Malkus doubled, then scored on Lonzo’s single, but also made only that one run from four hits in the top 1st, since Waters’ single saw Lonzo scampering from home from second base, which he had swiped in the meantime, only to be thrown out by Gaudencio Callaia. Raffy then took his 1.11 ERA into battle against Milwaukee, conceded a leadoff single to Pigman and saw Lonzo fling away a potential double play groundball by Ricky Lopez, but then retired the next three neatly and orderly and didn’t concede a run. Raffy next got his first RBI of the year with a sac fly to center, scoring Mikio Suzuki for a 2-0 lead, then gave up a 2-out double to Rodriguez in the bottom 2nd… and a four-pitch walk to Noel Groh. This kid… Pigman was kind enough to ground out to Waters to end the inning, but… oh, this kid…!

Suggs and Steinbacher singles in the third inning plated a run for the Loggers, but so did doubles whacked by Crum and Gowin in the following half-inning, plus Travis Malkus’ 2-out RBI single to extend the lead to 4-1. Add a Pucks triple and Waters’ RBI groundout, plus another Ramsay solo jack in the fifth, and it was 6-1. The Loggers’ 3-4-5 then hit straight singles off de la Cruz with one gone in the fifth, but also made it two gone, when Zach Suggs was thrown out at the plate by Ken Crum, trying to score from second base on Steinbacher’s single to left. Dale Haracz then popped out to Malkus to strand the other two runners. Nevertheless, once again Raffy needed a whopping 82 pitches just to get through five innings… He pitched the sixth to conclusion, but it was awful, with doubles for Thomas and Roberto Alvarado (a reliever!), and another single from Pigman to get the Loggers back to 6-3…

Ken Crum then finally found the seats for a solo homer in the eighth inning, but so did Pigman off Jim Larson to lead off the ninth, reducing the lead to three runs again and bringing out Daley. Ignoring a walk to Callaia with two outs, Daley struck out the side to put the game into the books. 7-4 Raccoons. Malkus 2-5, 2B, RBI; Lavorano 2-5, RBI; Waters 2-5, RBI; Ramsay 2-4, HR, RBI; Crum 2-4, HR, 2B, RBI; Suzuki 2-4; Gowin 2-4, 2 2B, RBI;

Interlude: Trade

The Raccoons brought in veteran right-hander Raul Cornejo (0-0, 4.50 ERA) from the Buffos on Thursday. The Buffaloes were eager to get rid of him and almost threw him out for free, accepting the token return of 30-year-old AAA MR Danny Cancel, which was just one step above a bag of used baseballs, but below a bag of *new* baseballs.

Cornejo had been a starter in his 20s, tingling up and down the Federal League, going 85-85 with a 4.23 ERA and 13 saves. He was on a $1.16M contract that was to expire after the season. Cancel had made 36 scattered appearances from 2047 through 2052, posting a 3.83 ERA across 42.1 innings in total.

Jim Larson and his 8.10 ERA were then the next departure towards AAA. That’s what we got for appreciating a nice debut in ’52 and giving him a free pass onto the roster for this season.

Raccoons (11-14) @ Loggers (8-16) – May 5-8, 2053

Game 4
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – RF Lopez – CF Perez – C Philipps – P Baker
MIL: LF Pigman – 2B R. Lopez – SS Z. Suggs – RF Callaia – CF Steinbacher – 1B Haracz – C Abrego – 3B J. Rodriguez – P Morrill

Waters singling home Malkus, who had also singled to begin the game, gave the Coons another quick 1-0 lead, and that was the only run through four innings amidst little offense otherwise. Baker allowed only one base hit in four innings before hitting a single himself to begin the top 5th, but undeniably the Loggers had some solid contact especially in the first two innings, but all the fly balls went right to an outfielder. Following Baker’s leadoff single in the fifth, Malkus socked a double, and Lonzo was nicked, which loaded the bags with nobody out. Two runs scored; one on Waters’ long sac fly to center, and another on a wild pitch. Crum grounded into a fielder’s choice, Ramsay walked, and Tony Lopez continued to be the most expensive inning-ending grounder to short that money could buy. Bottom 5th, Haracz had a leadoff walk, but Nick Abrego hit into a 6-4-3 double play. Jose Rodriguez coaxed another walk, but the third out was easily picked from the pitcher Morrill.

The Coons added three runs on five singles and knocked out Morrill in the sixth inning, going up 6-0 in the process. Philipps, Lonzo, and Crum got RBI’s. Pigman and Callaia then went to the corners with two outs for Milwaukee. With left-handed batters behind Steinbacher and Baker on 96 pitches, Steinbacher would be his last batter; unfortunately he went out with the shutout cracked to pieces as Steinbacher hit an RBI single to center. Vic Flores entered in a double switch (Ramsay went for the showers and Crum moved to first, with Pucks going into the #9 hole) and got Haracz out to second base on a single pitch. Tony Lopez then creamed a John Norris pitch for his first Coons home run in the seventh, 7-1. Flores pitched the seventh inning for Portland as well, then was hit for with Suzuki and two outs in the eighth; Suzuki added an eighth run for the Coons with a single, plating Malkus. Up by seven, the Raccoons then put Watson in the game with the intent of having him collect the last six outs. He struck out four, walked one, and gave up two hits, but didn’t concede any runs to the Loggers, as the Raccoons grabbed the series. 8-1 Raccoons! Malkus 3-5, BB, 2B; Waters 2-3, 2 RBI; Suzuki (PH) 1-1, RBI; Perez 2-5; Watson 2.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 4 K;

And now only one game under .500 and four games off the division-heading Indians. I mean, I don’t have an acute case of hysteria going, but maybe the first three weeks weren’t the whole story about this team.

Hopefully.

Raccoons (14-15) @ Cyclones (13-15) – May 9-11, 2053

Fifth in runs scored, fourth in runs allowed, and with a +13 run differential, the Cyclones looked like they were due some good luck, but that’s where the worst pen in the league with a staggering 6.07 ERA came in, I guess. Besides, the Coons’ run differential was even better, at +17. We were ninth in runs scored, but second in runs allowed in the CL (but also with a horrendous pen, while at this mark our rotation was actually the best in the CL!). These teams had only met once in the last five years, a series in 2050 in which the Raccoons dropped two of three games.

Projected matchups:
Seisaku Taki (3-2, 1.77 ERA) vs. Arthur Pickett (3-1, 1.96 ERA)
Victor Salcido (3-1, 2.16 ERA) vs. Martino Barbiusa (2-2, 2.85 ERA)
Cameron Argenziano (0-1, 6.75 ERA) vs. Jameson Monk (3-0, 3.99 ERA)

Another set without a southpaw opponent, making it seven right-handers for the week.

With the next off day only on Thursday next week, the Raccoons would continue to give off days to all the regulars. Ramsay, Lonzo, and Crum had yet to take a seat, and the first two’s turn was right in the opener.

Game 1
POR: 2B Malkus – C Gowin – SS Waters – 1B Crum – RF Lopez – CF Suzuki – LF Perez – 3B Crispin – P Taki
CIN: SS J. Ojeda – 1B G. Brown – LF del Toro – RF C. Williams – 3B Burgos – 2B C. Delgado – C Sicco – CF Roura – P Pickett

Taki’s scoreless streak ended fast, with two walks to Gabe Brown and Juan del Toro (grumble grumble) and a Chad Williams RBI single in the bottom 1st, but at least Jesus Burgos whiffed and Chris Delgado flew out easily to Perez. And it was obvious that Taki was just that little bit off and kept soul-searching; he also walked Dave Roura in the second, but then hit a single for himself in the third inning, and scored when Englishman Arthur Pickett walked Malkus and gave up an RBI single to Chris Gowin. Roura overran the ball in center, giving the trailing runners an extra base as well, but it didn’t really matter, because Matt Waters belted a fastball to Kingdom Come anyway, putting the Coons ahead 4-1.

Taki remained vulnerable, giving up three singles and a run in the fourth inning, and that was with Roura, who had a rough day, hitting into a double play to limit the damage. Williams and Burgos reached on a single and walk, respectively, in the bottom 5th, but Chris Delgado popped out foul; Taki had only one whiff against four walks through five innings, which was *really* unusual. Valentino Sicco and Roura then drew leadoff walks to begin the sixth and that was the end for Taki, who walked off to the dugout mumbling into his glove. The tying runs scored against Hitchcock, who gave up another single to Juan Ojeda and walked del Toro. One of those days…

Things calmed noticeably after that, with nobody reaching in the next two innings, with for Portland were covered entirely by Rule 5er Antonio Alfaro, who increasingly looked like the best addition from this offseason… Ross Mitchell retired three left-handed bats as a right-hander in the top 9th, after which the Coons went to their new reliever, Raul Cornejo, who promptly retired nobody whatsoever in the bottom 9th as the Cyclones walked off on three singles. 5-4 Cyclones. Alfaro 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

Sigh.

Game 2
POR: SS Lavorano – C Gowin – 2B Waters – 1B Ramsay – RF Puckeridge – CF Suzuki – LF Perez – 3B Blackshire – P Salcido
CIN: C Sicco – 1B G. Brown – RF C. Williams – 3B Burgos – 2B C. Delgado – SS Floyd – LF A. Marquez – CF Roura – P Barbiusa

Lonzo singled home the game’s first run on Saturday, rushing a ball up the middle to bring in Suzuki from second; Suzuki had reached on a walk and had moved up to second base on Salcido’s single. Gowin grounded out to Burgos to leave a pair on base, while Barbiusa returned the favor to single off the other pitcher, but was then doubled off by Sicco to end the bottom 3rd. Barbiusa was the only Cyclone to land a hit off Salcido the first time through.

Things started to crumble in the fifth, and the Cyclones didn’t even need a hit for that. Delgado got nicked to begin the inning, and when Josh Floyd grounded to third base, Blackshire threw the ball quite well away for a 2-base error, putting a pair in scoring position with zero outs. The Cyclones tied the game on two groundouts, but Barbiusa struck out to strand Floyd on third base. Blackshire tried to make amends with a go-ahead sac fly in the seventh inning, bringing in Suzuki to get up 2-1 by flying out to Chad Williams, and the Coons tacked on the inning after. Lonzo opened with a single through the left side, stole his 14th bag of the year, and came home on a 2-out single to center by Ramsay. Pucks doubled to center, and Ramsay scored when Sicco couldn’t contain a bounced breaking ball and had to chase it down the first base line, 4-1. Suzuki popped out to short to end the inning with a runner left on third base.

Salcido reached the bottom 8th, but was then taken deep by Roura, 4-2, which was only the second hit off him in the game, but when he also walked Sicco, the Coons went to the pen, and straight to Daley in a double switch. He went into Suzuki’s spot, with Perez to center and Crum entering in left. He then gave up a bomb to Gabe Brown to make the whole point ******* moot. Neither team scoring in the ninth inning sent the 4-4 contest to extras, with only three hits on the Cyclones’ ledger, but two of them had gone out of the park.

Eloy Sencion walked Roura, but struck out two to get through the tenth inning, but the Raccoons still couldn’t score, and then lost another game in walkoff fashion when Steve Watson walked a pair and gave up a 2-out walkoff single to pinch-hitting Juan Ojeda in the bottom 11th… 5-4 Cyclones. Lavorano 2-5, RBI; Crum 1-1; Salcido 7.2 IP, 2 H, 3 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 6 K and 1-3;

The postgame blurb then also saw Steve Watson listed as “injured, diagnosis pending”, and I swear it had absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with me breaking a bat over his numb skull. He was eventually listed as day-to-day with a mild ankle sprain.

Gone instead was Dave Blackshire (.172, 0 HR, 1 RBI with shaky defense), who was replaced by 24-year-old INF Joe Boese, the #109 pick from 2047. He would be solid on all infield positions, but had little to no experience at short. The stick was of the ho-hum variety, but he had hit 10 homers in half an AA season last year, and was around the league average in OPS in AAA since then. No speed.

Game 3
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – RF Puckeridge – CF Suzuki – C Philipps – P Argenziano
CIN: 3B Burgos – 2B C. Delgado – LF del Toro – 1B G. Brown – C J. Luna – SS Floyd – RF A. Marquez – CF Roura – P Monk

Three hits, three walks, and four runs drowned Argenziano right in the first inning. He looked like arse, he pitched like arse, and he got the stuffing he deserved. The Raccoons reacted appropriately and sent the garbage duty candidates stretching. Ramsay and Suzuki hits and Philipps’ run-scoring groundout made up a run in the second inning, but Argenziano gave the run back on a del Toro single, a balk, a wild pitch, and a sac fly by Gabe Brown… He allowed hits to Floyd and Roura in the bottom 3rd, but we assumed he’d at least get the free out from Monk, who bunted a comebacker. Argenziano, for reasons best left un-uncovered, threw the ball to a very surprised Travis Malkus at third base, but Floyd actually beat Malkus there, and the bags were full with one out. Argenziano was yanked and stricken off the roster and the Christmas card list right away. Alfaro took over and conceded one run on Burgos’ groundout, but popped out Delgado to get out of the ******* inning.

The Coons continued to have base runners, but to shorten things up considerably in every sense of the words had Tyler Philipps hit into a double play in the fourth, Lonzo hit into a double play in the fifth, and Crum hit into a double play in the sixth to suffocate each and every opportunity that might have had arisen from those runners. Alfaro pitched nicely into the sixth, before imploding for four straight hits and three more runs on the board, as if it still mattered. Lonzo hit into ANOTHER double play in the eighth inning, and down by a double slam in the ninth inning, Joe Boese opened the inning by pinch-hitting for Waters against righty Willie Santiago. He grounded out to short as the Coons went down 1-2-3. 9-1 Cyclones. Waters 2-3; Ramsay 2-4;

In other news

May 5 – The Warriors lose their closer Ben Lussier (1-1, 2.79 ERA, 3 SV) to a torn labrum, potentially for the rest of the season.
May 5 – The Falcons would be without 22-yr old LF/RF Danny Ceballos (.351, 0 HR, 11 RBI) for at least a week as the youngster was having trouble with a sore ankle.
May 5 – A 13th-inning walkoff sac fly by WAS OF Neville van de Wouw (.333, 6 HR, 16 RBI) scores the first and only run in a 1-0 victory against the Cyclones.
May 6 – The Canadiens kill off the 24-game hitting streak of IND LF/RF/1B Bill Quinteros (.376, 8 HR, 23 RBI) and beat the Indians as well, 10-5.
May 6 – Veteran SP Mike LeMasters (1-2, 2.73 ERA) throws a 3-hit shutout for the Buffaloes to beat the Rebels, 3-0.
May 7 – VAN SP Juan Ramos (2-1, 4.45 ERA) could be out for the rest of the season; the 37-year-old is in need of surgical removal of bone spurs from his elbow.
May 9 – Falcons infielder Ian Woodrome (.284, 3 HR, 16 RBI) could miss half the season with a strained hip muscle.

FL Player of the Week: SAL 1B Toushi Imai (.300, 3 HR, 13 RBI), batting .467 (14-30) with 2 HR, 5 RBI
CL Player of the Week: IND OF Angel Mendez (.420, 2 HR, 16 RBI), swatting .552 (16-29) with 1 HR, 7 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Lonzo’s appearance streak ended on Friday, mostly because the Raccoons ended up tied in the ninth and in a situation where they were probably going to double switch him in if only Raul Cornejo could manage to not lose the game within three batters – which he did. Alternatively, Lonzo would have hit for the pitcher in the top 9th, if only any of the 6-7-8 had reached base – which they didn’t.

Bums!

Joe Boese’s surname is German for “bad”, but I am told not in the sense of “you suck”, but more in the way of “you naughty boy!”. If he goes 3-for-4 with a homer, he can be as naughty as he wants. The “oe” sounds like the U in “turn” – which is also what this team needs, a U-turn towards the .500 mark…..!

[crickets]

Cristiano, you’re fired as joke writer. But I’ll retain you as scapegoat. Because everybody needs a scapegoat, and we’re going through relievers too fast to really zone in on any one of them.

The Coons would face the Gold Sox and Indians next week, but ending this week, we had three pitchers in the top 5 in ERA in the Continental League: Raffy led with a 1.64 ERA, with Salcido in second at 2.20, and Taki bringing up the rear with a 2.31 mark. Yeah… about that…

Fun Fact: Victor Salcido is pitching with the #1 defense and a .202 BABIP behind him.

All will be well. All will be well. All will be well.

(ducks and runs as liners keep screaming over his head)

+++

Service announcement: I'll have next week off, but depending on how rancid the team decides to be going forward, there might not be an update every day. There's only so many cookies I can eat to cope...! On the other paw, at least one update can be draft proceedings.

[Westheim]

Raccoons (14-18) vs. Gold Sox (18-14) – May 12-14, 2053

I wasn’t quite sure what was worse – having the four-time-defending champions from Denver in the house with the team in a general state of dissolution, or having Nick Valdes in the house with the team in a general state of dissolution. Valdes was here to bugger the mayor into getting permission to build a casino on the site of the city orphanage, which sounded like a bold proposal to begin with, and the Gold Sox were here to go to 21-14. They ranked only eighth in runs scored in the FL though, and third in runs allowed, and their run differential (+5) was *worse* than the Coons’ (+7). The Sox had a spectacular list of injuries to deal with, including elite starters Gary Perrone and John Kennedy, and elite batters Sandy Castillo and Ivan Villa. Add to that various pieces like Omar Gonzalez, Bill Ramires, and Kyle Brown, and you started to get a sense of their struggles. They weren’t suddenly bad – but they were badly hurt. The Coons had lost both the last regular season meeting in 2048, two games to one, and the 2051 World Series against them, the latter one in a rout, four games to zilch.

Projected matchups:
Rafael de la Cruz (3-1, 1.64 ERA) vs. Nick Robinson (2-3, 4.50 ERA)
Phil Baker (3-2, 4.60 ERA) vs. Andrew Clarke (3-3, 4.64 ERA)
Seisaku Taki (3-2, 2.31 ERA) vs. Jon Craig (4-1, 2.63 ERA)

Robinson was the first southpaw the Coons saw in over a week, and the only one expected in this set. The Jon Craig on Wednesday was the black Jon Craig, the one that had been on the Thunder, not the white one that had been on the Coons, who had last pitched in the majors in 2050 and was now retired.

Finally, the Coons made their 75th roster move of the season (rough estimate) when they punted Cameron Argenziano (0-2, 11.74 ERA) back to AAA. Wheats was expected to come off the DL in the middle of the week (but would slot in behind Taki in any case), and we brought back Eric Reese as roster filler for a couple of days.

Game 1
DEN: CF Lassley – RF Ayres – C Mickle – 1B C. Rice – LF Angulo – SS R. Price – 3B B. Owen – 2B Erazo – P N. Robinson
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – CF Puckeridge – C Gowin – RF Lopez – 1B Philipps – P de la Cruz

The Gold Sox lineup entering this game had a total of ONE homer on the season (Rick Price), and only four guys batting over .200 in any capacity, which included southpaw Nick Robinson, but they still took a lead in the third inning when Juan Erazo (who?) singled, was bunted to second, and was singled home by Sean Lassley. Vic Ayres also singled, but Blake Mickle grounded out to end the inning. Travis Malkus homered to left to tie the game again in the same inning, and after Matt Waters worked a 2-out walk, Ken Crum hit another deep fly to left, but that one was caught on the track by Angel Angulo. That was it through five innings, with three hits and one run for each side, and with pitching dominant. Raffy had struck out seven, and Robinson six. – Yes, Nick, they have won four titles in a row. – No, Nick, we’ve never won four titles in a row. – We had five pennants in a row! – Yes, Nick, the sooner I stop babbling and build a winning team, the sooner we can win four titles in a row…..

Raffy met a sticky end in the seventh inning, walking Rick Price and conceding the run on a 2-out hit by Erazo, which set Denver ahead, 2-1, again. Raul Sevilla drew another walk, Raffy nailed Lassley, and then was removed with the bases loaded. Vic Flores came in to oversee the ultimate collapse of the effort, giving up 2-run knocks to both Ayres and Mickle.

Pucks singled and Gowin hit a seemingly useless homer in the bottom 7th to narrow the score to 6-3 again, but the Coons kept scratching in the eighth against Kellen Lanning. Malkus and Waters went to the corners with one out, and Crum’s grounder to left eluded Ryan Thompson at third base for an RBI single, which meant the tying run was on base now. Pucks grounded out and Gowin lined out to Thompson, however, ending the inning. The tying runs reached again in the bottom 9th, however, then facing ex-Coon Mike Lynn, who conceded 1-out singles to Philipps and Ramsay. Malkus flew out to Lassley, and Lonzo grounded out to Price to sink the team for good. 6-4 Gold Sox. Waters 2-3, BB, 2B; Gowin 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Ramsay (PH) 1-1;

Game 2
DEN: CF Lassley – RF Ayres – C Mickle – 1B C. Rice – LF Angulo – SS R. Price – 3B B. Owen – 2B Erazo – P Clarke
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – RF Puckeridge – C Gowin – CF Suzuki – P Baker

Things got uglier by Tuesday, with a bunch of kids in the seats behind the Coons dugout, holding up signs reading “Save our Orphanage!”, which made Nick Valdes snarl in dismay. Pretty much the same noise I made when Phil Baker walked the first two batters of the Denver Volkssturm to begin the game, although the next three also made soggy outs and the team didn’t score in the inning. Baker offered another leadoff walk to Brandon Owen in the second, but that runner also stuck. Ramsay reached on an Owen error to open the bottom 2nd, and a Pucks double to right then put a pair in scoring position. A pair of sac flies out of the 7-8 spots put the Coons up 2-0, but Baker knew how to rid himself of a lead like few others. Lassley single, walk to Ayres, and while Mickle struck out and Chris Rice grounded out, Angel Angulo’s RBI single got the Sox on the board, and a walk to Price filled the bases. Brandon Owen’s 2-run single to center flipped the score, before Erazo grounded out to Lonzo. – Y’know, Nick, how about saving the orphanage and instead tearing down this dump and build the casino here…?

Baker sucked so bad, he got shanked by the fourth inning, offering five walks in total. Eloy Sencion got the ball with Lassley (single) and Ayres (walk) on base and two outs, with Rice at the plate, and buggered out of the inning with a K. Ramsay tied the score with a solo homer in the bottom 4th. The fifth was calm, and in the sixth Alfaro replaced Sencion and kept the Gold Sox in the tie. Clarke then began the bottom 6th with walks to Waters and Crum, although Ramsay and Pucks made poor outs on shallow pops. Chris Gowin did better, wrapping a 3-run homer around the left foul pole to send the Coons into a 6-3 lead. The orphans briefly cheered and laughed until reminded by their adult supervision that they had to look sad. Anyway, Nick Valdes jubilated.

At least until Chris Rice answered with a 2-run homer off Alfaro, who was pressed into long relief again. That narrowed the score to 6-5 in the seventh, before Ed Crispin answered by belting a pinch-hit homer off Jesus Cardenas in the bottom of the inning. That sure livened up his .140 average…! Hitchcock held the lead in the top 8th, and Ramsay uncorked another homer off Kellen Lanning in the bottom 8th. Better yet, Fernando Perez reached with a single, stole second, and then was driven in with two outs by Joe Boese, who got his first major league hit and RBI, a 2-out single to right…!

While I was receiving congratulations from Nick Valdes on the sound addition of Harry Ramsay and Naughty Joe, the Coons boldly put Eric Reese into the ninth inning with a 4-run lead. He retired nobody; Ayres walked, Mickle whacked an RBI double, and Rice reached on a Crispin error. Kevin Daley thus entered with nobody out and the tying run at the dish, struck out Angulo, gave up an RBI single to Price, and then faced fallen-from-grace pinch-hitter Tylor Cecil, who got ahead 3-1 in the count, and then bounced one to Lonzo that ended the game in 6-4-3 fashion. 9-7 Coons. Crispin (PH) 1-2, HR, RBI; Waters 1-2, 2 BB; Ramsay 2-4, 2 HR, 2 RBI; Gowin 2-3, HR, 4 RBI; Boese (PH) 1-2, RBI;

Eric Reese (0-0, 9.00 ERA) went as swiftly as he came, with Wheats being activated from the DL on Wednesday, although he wouldn’t make a start until the weekend.

By the way, Nick, the guys from the Native American-run casino down the street called, they want a word with y- … (Valdes walks by with an arrow sticking out of his shoulder) … Oh, I see you already met them.

Game 3
DEN: 3B R. Thompson – RF Ayres – 1B C. Rice – LF Angulo – SS R. Price – CF Lassley – C R. Sanchez – 2B Erazo – P J. Craig
POR: 3B Malkus – C Gowin – SS Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – CF Puckeridge – RF Lopez – 2B Boese – P Taki

Neither team had a run and no more than two hits in the first three innings, but Rick Price doubled home Ayres, who had singled and stolen second base, with two outs in the fourth inning to put the Gold Sox in front. The Coons answered with having Ramsay nicked and Pucks singling, but Tony Lopez flew out to Lassley to strand the runners in the bottom 4th, and that very much described the Raccoons’ offensive actions as long as Taki was in the game, which was seven innings. He struck out eight, but also gave up a homer to Angulo in the sixth that extended the Sox’ lead to 2-0. – Yeah Nick, this place is like hell already. All that it needs is a couple of roulette tables. – Yes, the dismal team should live in the orphanage!

Bottom 7th, Pucks singled with one out, bringing up the go-ahead run in Tony Lopez, who grounded into a double play, which reminds me that I have to ask Steve from Accounting what our return policy on Lopez is. The Titans clearly delivered damaged goods! The Titans were probably also laughing all the way to the bank… Vic Flores getting taken deep by Rice made it 3-0 in the eighth, but the Coons had the tying run in the box again in the bottom of the inning after Malkus and Gowin got on base with two outs. Waters grounded out to Erazo, and that was that. Craig continued to bid for a shutout until Ramsay took him deep in solo fashion with one out in the bottom 9th, 3-1, at which point Lynn replaced him. Pucks grounded out, and so did Philipps in Lopez’ spot. 3-1 Gold Sox. Puckeridge 3-4, 2B; Taki 7.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 8 K, L (3-3) and 1-2;

What is it, Maud? – I don’t know whether Nick wants to meet with some of the orphans. (Valdes shakes his head, but Maud leads in the orphans anyway) – Oh, look, Nick, they painted a picture for you!

Raccoons (15-20) @ Indians (22-11) – May 16-18, 2053

First in runs scored, fourth in runs allowed, with a +55 run differential that indicated that maybe it was their turn this year – the Indians were surely not gonna be a joy to play against. They led the season series, 2-1.

Projected matchups:
Jason Wheatley (0-2, 3.71 ERA) vs. Enrique Ortiz (3-1, 2.94 ERA)
Victor Salcido (3-1, 2.20 ERA) vs. Thomas Turpeau (2-1, 2.00 ERA)
Rafael de la Cruz (3-2, 2.40 ERA) vs. Tan Brink (3-1, 3.04 ERA)

Right, left, right. And probably no points to get any ideas about wins.

Game 1
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – 1B Ramsay – LF Puckeridge – C Gowin – CF Perez – RF Lopez – P Wheatley
IND: SS Clover – 2B N. Fernandez – C Poindexter – 1B B. Quinteros – 3B B. Anderson – RF S. King – LF Hare – CF A. Mendez – P En. Ortiz

Winless Wheatley squared off against a .667 team right off the DL, so I feared the very worst. He was notably behind most batters in the first two innings, but didn’t allow a run yet; instead the Critters crammed five hits into the third inning and scored four runs, initially with straight singles from Malkus, Lonzo (who had zero hits against Denver), and Waters, who drove in the first run. Ramsay doubled home Lonzo, and Pucks singled home the remainder and stole second base before the inning fizzled out. And Wheats ran with that – he wasn’t flashy, he wasn’t dominant, but he got better after the searching start, struck out four by the end of the fifth inning, and when Chase Clover hit a single in the sixth, that was only the Indians’ second hit in the game, and he was stranded, too.

Bobby Anderson singled to center with one out in the seventh, and Wheats walked Josh Hare with two gone, which also put him on 100 pitches, which we deemed enough, especially with the guy with a 22-game hitting streak, Angel Mendez, in the #8 hole. The Coons went for Hitchcock, and Mendez grounded out to Travis Malkus, dropping to 0-for-3. With seven complete, he was now on the mercy of his teammates… or probably the Raccoons famously flammable bullpen. Hitchcock retired Pat Lovell to begin the bottom 8th, then allowed a single to Clover and a walk to Nick Fernandez. Flores replaced him, walked Manny Poindexter, and gave up two runs on a Bill Quinteros single. Exit Flores, enter more gasoline. Cornejo got Bobby Anderson to bounce to Malkus, but the Coons only got an out at second base, but Scott King also kindly grounded out to third base – but Mendez would get another shot at it in the ninth inning. Hare grounded out against Daley, but so did Mendez, retired when Lonzo made a ranging play and a perfect zing to beat him to first in a bang-bang play. Alex de Castro singled, but PH Rusty White struck out, which ended Mendez’ streak for good. 4-2 Coons. Lavorano 2-4; Waters 2-3, BB, RBI; Puckeridge 2-4, 2 RBI; Wheatley 6.2 IP, 3 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 4 K, W (1-2);

A win for Wheatley!

We also had all of one more base hit after the third inning…

Tony Lopez? Batting 3-for-his-last-57. With a homer, though, so he stays in the lineup….!

Game 2
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – C Philipps – RF Lopez – CF Suzuki – P Salcido
IND: LF R. White – 2B N. Fernandez – C Poindexter – 1B B. Quinteros – 3B B. Anderson – RF S. King – SS Clover – CF A. Mendez – P Turpeau

Salcido niftily turned a 1-6-3 double play in the first inning after fooling White and Poindexter on base in the first place, with Bill Quinteros (.353, 8 HR, 27 RBI) looking not very happy at all. Salcido walked Anderson and King to begin the bottom 2nd, then got two pops and a K from Turpeau to somehow weasel out again. The Indians appeared to finally nip him in the third inning when he offered ANOTHER leadoff walk to White and Fernandez singled, but White then was caught stealing third base ahead of a wild pitch, and Poindexter and Quinteros made yet more soggy outs to keep the Indians off the bases. The first run in the game was actually a homer to left for Ken Crum in the fourth. It was of the solo variety. The lead didn’t last, because Salcido issued ANOTHER leadoff walk, and this time surrendered a run with a King single and Mendez’ run-scoring groundout in the same inning. To be fair, it wasn’t a one-sided affair – Salcido also *drew* a leadoff walk from Turpeau in the fifth inning, with the Indians hurler going on to smack Malkus with a fastball. Lonzo grounded out, advancing the runners, but Matt Waters stuffed a double into the leftfield corner to send the Coons up 3-1 before being left stranded himself.

After Salcido had a 1-2-3 fifth (!!), the Coons had their first two on again in the sixth, with singles from Philipps and Tony Lopez (!!!!). Suzuki hit into a fielder’s choice, Salcido struck out, but Malkus whipped a double into the gap to get two more runs on the board, yet a Quinteros bloop single and a King homer to left pulled those two runs back.

Poor Bill Nichol then gave up doubles to Waters, Crum, and Lopez (!!!!!) in the seventh inning, getting yanked when Suzuki’s groundout brought in the third run of the inning, 8-3 in total. Crispin batted for Salcido, but grounded out – Lopez’ run scored before that, though, on a wild pitch by Josh Livingston. Two more runs scored against Rich Knowles in the eighth inning as the Indians kept merrily collapsing, while Watson, Sencion, and Cornejo held the Indians scoreless in the last three innings. 11-3 Raccoons! Malkus 2-3, BB, 2B, 2 RBI; Waters 2-4, 2 2B, 2 RBI; Puckeridge (PH) 1-2, RBI; Crum 2-5, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; Ramsay 2-4, BB, RBI; Lopez 3-4, BB, 2B, RBI;

The Indians then successfully conducted a rain dance, getting the Raccoons out of town without having to play them again on Sunday, so our week ended with a 3-2 tally.

In other news

May 13 – Indians OF Angel Mendez (.423, 2 HR, 17 RBI) connects for a triple and an RBI single in an 11-9 win over the Buffaloes to extend a hitting streak to 20 games.
May 13 – The Aces would have to go on without Jim White (.365, 1 HR, 15 RBI) for a month at least; the super utility was out with a broken thumb.
May 15 – The Titans lose catcher Ian Davison (.297, 0 HR, 8 RBI) for the year; the 26-year-old had torn an anterior cruciate ligament.
May 16 – CHA C/1B Kevin Weese (.302, 1 HR, 15 RBI) would have to sit out for about two weeks after spraining his thumb.
May 16 – The Gold Sox acquire SP Chris Jones (3-1, 2.68 ERA) from the Falcons for two prospects.
May 18 – A triple by OF Felix Rojas (.286, 1 HR, 13 RBI) is the only hit for Dallas in a 3-0 loss to the Warriors’ #5 prospect SP Ricardo Montoya (2-1, 2.23 ERA) and two relievers.

FL Player of the Week: SAC 1B Steve Wyatt (.320, 7 HR, 25 RBI), hitting .500 (10-20) with 2 HR, 4 RBI
CL Player of the Week: MIL INF Zach Suggs (.375, 12 HR, 37 RBI), slugging .455 (10-22) with 4 HR, 10 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Sunday’s rainout moves into a double-header in June, but it’s not like the road trip will be over any time soon. We’re now off to Boston for four games there, and then it’s still on to Atlanta and Vegas before we’ll return home at the end of the month.

…and just when Tony Lopez finally found his ******* stick!!

To be honest, I have no clue anymore where this season’s gonna go. They might lose a hundred. If we can figure out a way to patch the pen and maybe even a competent fifth starter, they might even win 90. I have no idea. The cold hard facts are that we have four starters with a sub-3 ERA (although Wheats does not quite qualify at this point), so that’s gotta be worth something…?

Is Salcido finally fixed? And Sencion, too? They both looked like utter trash last year, and so far they’ve been … well, there are some hints of writing on the wall, but so far the results at least have been very palatable.

The Coons would skip Baker’s next turn by moving Raffy to Monday and then pushing Baker to the end of the line. He was really the odd one out, but in-house options were slim. You could try Alfaro, but he had low stamina. Argenziano still had bat splinters between his fluffy cheeks, and both Josh Mayo and Kyle Brobeck were having a rough time in AAA. Same for Matt Dixon, who wasn’t even on the 40-man anymore.

Fun Fact: The Coons have already used 18 pitchers this year.

Not including Raul Medrano, who now had a 7.88 ERA in AAA and wasn’t gonna come up again any time soon.

Of the 18 pitchers, ten had an ERA of 3.38 (Flores) or better. Three were in the fours (Alfaro, Daley, Baker). And the last five were well over the fours: Jim Larson (8.10), Eric Reese (9.00), Ryan Harmer (10.29), Mike Snyder (10.80), and Cameron Argenziano (11.74) – none of whom were currently on the roster anymore.

And for good reason!!

Even those FIPs are ghastly. Jesus, Maldonado, and Joseph…: 5.44 (Reese), 5.67 (Argenziano), 6.19 (Larson), 8.19 (Harmer), and 12.19 (Snyder).

[Westheim]

Raccoons (17-20) @ Titans (17-20) – May 19-22, 2053

Boston had the lowest batting average in the league and the second-fewest runs scored, which was weird, considering they had successfully dropped Tony Lopez’ unproductive *** on the Raccoons. They were ranked eighth in runs allowed, with a -20 run differential. Looking up and down the roster, there was a whole lotta crummy to be seen. But they had won last year’s season series, 10-8, and the Coons had not won any season series against Boston in three years.

Projected matchups:
Rafael de la Cruz (3-2, 2.40 ERA) vs. Jordan Ramos (0-1, 2.40 ERA)
Phil Baker (3-2, 4.89 ERA) vs. Justin Johns (2-4, 4.53 ERA)
Seisaku Taki (3-3, 2.34 ERA) vs. Kyle Turay (3-3, 5.05 ERA)
Jason Wheatley (1-2, 2.97 ERA) vs. Felix Castano (1-4, 5.03 ERA)

It was a bit surprising to see them use both Ramos and Johns in the rotation when both were established relievers. Ramos would make his first start of the year on Monday, but Johns had already made seven this season. He had made only two spot starts in the majors in the preceding six years, both for the Thunder in 2051. All the options coming up were right-handed; we’d miss their sole southpaw, David Barnes, also more renowned for relief work.

Game 1
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – 1B Ramsay – LF Crum – CF Puckeridge – C Gowin – RF Lopez – P de la Cruz
BOS: CF Whitlow – 2B M. Martinez – RF D. Gonzalez – 1B L. Rodriguez – SS Lettner – C Brewer – LF Spath – 3B Ro. Jimenez – P Jo. Ramos

Harry Ramsay kept raking, smashing a 2-run homer to right in the first inning for his ninth of the year. Lonzo singling, stealing second, and scoring on a Waters single added a run in the third inning, but de la Cruz gave back a run to Josh Spath when the 24-year-old rookie mashed his first career homer to right in the bottom of the same inning; Spath was the only Titan to reach base the first time through. Ken Crum answered with another solo homer to right, really spoiling the fans out there with free baseballs, to make it 4-1 in the fourth inning, but Raffy leaked another run with leadoff singles for Jason Lettner and Aaron Brewer (shyly waves hi) in the bottom 5th. Spath then hit into a double play, which got Lettner home from third base, before Rocky Jimenez grounded out to short, but at least Raffy did all that in “just” 61 pitches through five innings, which was a step in the right direction. He would throw 92 pitches through eight innings, allowing only one more single along the way, but the Raccoons had also stopped hitting bombs by then, and the score was still 4-2 in the ninth inning, where Jamie Guidry, a southpaw, came in to face the 6-7-8 batters. Joe Boese batted for Pucks and singled, and Gowin and Lopez did the same, loading the bags with nobody out. In true Coons tradition, Tyler Philipps batted for Raffy and hit a comebacker for a force out at the plate, and Travis Malkus rumbled into a double play to ensure no runs were scored. At least Daley struck out two at the top of the order in a 1-2-3 bottom 9th… 4-2 Coons. Ramsay 2-4, HR, 2B, 2 RBI; Boese (PH) 1-1; Lopez 2-4; de la Cruz 8.0 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 8 K, W (4-2);

I especially like the part where Raffy walked nobody. We’re doling out WAAAY too many walks…

Game 2
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – 1B Ramsay – LF Crum – RF Puckeridge – C Gowin – CF Perez – P Baker
BOS: CF Whitlow – 2B M. Martinez – RF D. Gonzalez – 1B L. Rodriguez – C R. Gonzalez – SS Lettner – LF Hunt – 3B Ro. Jimenez – P Johns

Technically, the go-ahead run in the top 1st scored again with Ramsay batting, but on Tuesday it was Malkus coming home principally on a 2-out error by Rocky Jimenez and not a particularly loud knell off Ramsay’s bat. He did get an RBI in the second inning, though, and it was a big second inning; Pucks opened it innocently enough with a single and stole second base. He scored when Baker singled past Miguel Martinez with Pucks and Gowin on the corners. Malkus grounded out to move both remaining runners into scoring position, and Lonzo singled home a pair, then stole second and was driven in by Matt Waters, who himself came home on a Ramsay double to the base of the wall in centerfield. Nope, Johns didn’t do all that well as a starter – when Crum went down for the third out of the inning, the Coons were up 6-0 in the middle of the second.

And while the Coons tacked on two more runs in the fourth inning against reliever Chad Schultz, one with Crum hitting a sac fly with the bases loaded and one on a 2-out single by Puckeridge, 8-0, it should also be noted that Phil Baker was pitching, and potentially no lead was big enough, even though he struck out the first three batters he faced in the game, the Titans were getting closer. They put pairs on in the third and fourth innings, but stranded all of those runners, however in the bottom 5th it was Schultz to open with a double to left, which likely indicated that troubled times had arrived. Eric Whitlow grounded out, but Miguel Martinez singled home the runner, 8-1. It was also the last inning that Baker would finish. Lettner, Danny Hunt, Jimenez, and Whitlow all slapped singles off him in the sixth, and he left the game with two across, two on, and two out. Raul Cornejo plated the third run of the inning with a wild pitch before getting Martinez to ground out, and so the Titans were now within a slam again. The Coons answered by beating two more runs out of Schultz in the seventh inning. Pucks singled, stole second, and with two outs, Malkus’ double and Lonzo’s single each brought home another run, 10-4, before Waters grounded out to Lettner to bring on the stretch.

Sencion had a scoreless inning after the repeated exhortation that America be saved, but ex-Titan Steve Watson was less luc- … less adept in the bottom 8th, walking two and giving up a run on a sac fly, but he found the exit himself, barely. Joe Boese had another pinch-hit RBI single, scoring Chris Gowin, in the ninth inning, and Antonio Alfaro retired the Titans in order in the home half of the inning to get the Coons within one deep breath of .500 again. 11-5 Coons. Malkus 2-4, BB, 2B, RBI; Boese (PH) 1-1, RBI; Lavorano 3-6, 2B, 3 RBI; Waters 2-5, RBI; Ramsay 2-5, 2B, RBI; Puckeridge 3-5, RBI; Gowin 2-5; Perez 2-5;

Game 3
POR: 3B Malkus – CF Puckeridge – SS Waters – 1B Ramsay – LF Crum – RF Lopez – 2B Boese – C Philipps – P Taki
BOS: CF Whitlow – 2B M. Martinez – RF D. Gonzalez – 1B L. Rodriguez – C R. Gonzalez – SS Lettner – LF Hunt – 3B Ro. Jimenez – P Turay

By Wednesday, the Coons went up in the first inning for the third time in the series, getting Pucks on with a single, and into scoring position with a stolen base. Waters drove him home, then scored on a Ken Crum single for a quickie 2-0 lead. By the second inning, the Raccoons were down by one, though – but not on the scoreboard. Travis Malkus was disagreeing with the home plate umpire about a strike call at 3-2 and two outs, which led to some words, and then the ads were over, Ed Crispin was manning third base and Malkus was nowhere to be seen, having been ejected from the game.

Taki didn’t get any strikeouts the first time through the Titans order, but then got three on his second run through, which was all fine and dandy as long as the zero on the board stood, which it did through five innings, although the Titans scattered four singles off him. The Coons were up 3-0 by then, as Ken Crum had singled home Matt Waters for a second time in the fifth inning. Third time through for Taki? Again no strikeouts. Just one hit, a Jimenez single – but that single came leading off the bottom 8th, Taki balked the runner to second base, and then conceded the run on two deep fly outs by Ryan Wright and Whitlow that signalled that maybe a complete game wasn’t in the cards. Martinez flew out easily however to complete eight, on Taki’s 92nd pitch. No insurance run came about; while Crispin singled off Guidry to begin the top 9th, Lonzo, hitting for Pucks against the southpaw, grounded sharply right at Wright at short for a double play. Larry Rodriguez, also frequently offered to the Coons in various trade conversations between these two teams in the last 12 months, hit a 1-out single off Daley in the bottom 9th, but apart from that the Titans made three poor outs against the Coons’ closer. 3-1 Critters. Puckeridge 3-4, 2B; Crum 3-4, 2 RBI; Taki 8.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 3 K, W (4-3);

.500…!

Game 4
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – CF Puckeridge – C Gowin – RF Lopez – 2B Boese – P Wheatley
BOS: CF Whitlow – 2B M. Martinez – RF D. Gonzalez – 1B L. Rodriguez – C R. Gonzalez – SS Lettner – LF Hunt – 3B Ro. Jimenez – P Castano

For the first time in the series the Coons didn’t score in the top 1st, although Malkus and Ramsay hit singles, but instead Boston would take a lead in the bottom 3rd. Wheats put two on in the first inning with a walk and a single, but struck out the side in the second inning. Rocky Jimenez got in a leadoff single in the bottom 3rd, though, and was brought in by Whitlow with a sac fly after stealing second and being bunted over by his hurler. Wheats kept being up and down, walking a pair in the fifth inning, f.e., before buggering out with the help of a 5-4-3 double play very well started by Malkus. Neither team had more than three soft hits through five innings, and it took a Lonzo homer in the sixth inning to get the teams even. Same inning, Ramsay got nicked and Pucks singled, but that was already with two outs and Chris Gowin grounded out rather harmlessly. Wheats, an inning removed from two walks, then struck out the 3-4-5 batters. There was no consistency to this start of his, but so far he was still in a tie.

The Coons’ 7-8-9 all went down on strikes against Castano in the road half of the seventh frame, while Wheats walked Lettner to begin the bottom of that inning, upon which the Titans bombarded Wheatley with left-handed pinch-hitters of dubious provenance, but they got two singles off him with Spath and Ethan Torrence. Lettner, going from second, was thrown out at home on Spath’s single for the second out, but Spath reached second base on the play and scored on Torrence’s 2-out single from the #9 hole. Spath then flubbed a Lonzo single in leftfield, giving an extra base to the tying run with one out in the eighth inning, but weak groundouts by Crum and Ramsay stranded the runner at third base. Boston got an insurance run in the same inning as Hitchcock gave up a double to Miguel Martinez and a 2-out RBI single to Ruben Gonzalez, the former Raccoon. Eddie Sotelo retired Pucks, Waters, and Suzuki in order in the ninth to squirrel a game away for the Titans… 3-1 Titans. Lavorano 2-4, HR, RBI; Puckeridge 2-4; Wheatley 7.0 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 4 BB, 7 K, L (1-3);

Raccoons (20-21) @ Knights (23-19) – May 23-25, 2053

Here was a test – the Knights led the CL in runs scored with a crispy 5.15 per game, and were a decent fifth in runs allowed for a +38 run differential, but they found themselves five games out in the South at this point. The Coons had won the season series in ’52, five games to four, despite the Knights eventually going on to make the postseason.

Projected matchups:
Victor Salcido (4-1, 2.49 ERA) vs. Dave Hils (3-3, 4.71 ERA)
Rafael de la Cruz (4-2, 2.38 ERA) vs. Brian Jackson (3-3, 3.07 ERA)
Phil Baker (4-2, 5.09 ERA) vs. Esteban Duran (6-1, 3.18 ERA)

Righty, lefty, righty, but hopefully not losey, losey, losey.

Game 1
POR: SS Lavorano – SS Waters – LF Crum – 1B Ramsay – RF Puckeridge – C Gowin – CF Perez – 3B Crispin – P Salcido
ATL: SS W. Acosta – 2B F. Alba – CF Alade – 1B J. Rogers – C S. Suggs – RF Worden – LF Kirkwood – 3B Villacorta – P Hils

The ex-Coon battery gave up a run on two singles – Lonzo and Crum – and a stolen base – Lonzo, obviously – while the current-Coon battery lined up two zeroes, then went down in flames in the third inning. Chris Kirkwood and Leo Villacorta opened with singles, then were bunted into scoring position. Willie Acosta’s sac fly to right tied the game, but the real damage came from a pair of doubles down the rightfield line smashed by Fernando Alba and Jay Rogers further down the rabbit hole. In between, Salcido also threw a run-scoring wild pitch before walking Jon Alade. Sean Suggs eventually struck out (hah!) to end the inning, but by then there were four runs across.

Perhaps the team could answer right away, though. Ramsay, Pucks, and Perez all hit singles in the fourth inning, plating a run, and by the time Ed Crispin walked, the bases were loaded for Salcido, who popped out for the second out. Lonzo though crammed a ball right over the second base bag between the converging infielders for a game-tying 2-run single, four-all, but Waters struck out to kill the inning. Crum’s leadoff double to right-center and two productive groundouts by the 4-5 batters gave the Coons a 5-4 lead in the fifth, though. Crispin sent home Hils with a solo homer in the sixth, and his replacement Kyle DuPlessis walked the bases full in the inning after before giving up a bases-clearing double to leftfield to Fernando Perez…! Crispin added another run by singling through between Acosta and Villacorta, which got the Critters into double digits, 10-4.

Eloy Sencion then crapped out in the bottom 7th to get the Knights to rally. He loaded the bases with two hits and a walk, then gave up a 2-run double to Jay Rogers. He was yanked right there, and Raul Cornejo was kind enough to get out of the inning. By contrast, Steve Watson retired the bottom of the Atlanta in decent order, striking out two and without getting behind anybody. Sending him back out for the ninth was less spectacular; Acosta drew a leadoff walk in a full count, and Alba reached on a Crispin error, still with nobody out. Daley entered with panic budding, and gave up a 3-run homer to Jon Alade right away, which … (gnashes teeth) … bright sides, at least removed all the riffraff from the bases……. Calm restored, Daley then retired the next three in order to somehow disappear into the night with a win… 10-9 Critters. Lavorano 3-5, 2 RBI; Crum 2-4, BB, 2B, RBI; Ramsay 2-5; Perez 2-5, 2B, 4 RBI; Crispin 2-3, BB, HR, 2 RBI;

Game 2
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – 1B Crum – LF Puckeridge – RF Lopez – CF Perez – C Philipps – P de la Cruz
ATL: SS W. Acosta – 2B F. Alba – CF Alade – 1B J. Rogers – C S. Suggs – LF Kirkwood – RF Angeletti – 3B Villacorta – P B. Jackson

No run in the second, with J.P. Angeletti robbing Crum at the fence with Lonzo in scoring position, but in the second inning, Tyler Philipps got to narrowly miss a homer. He had to settle for an RBI double off the wall in leftfield, bringing in Pucks, with Tony Lopez going to third base. Raffy whiffed for the second out of the inning, but Malkus came through to bring in both runners for a 3-0 lead…!

Atlanta got on the board with a solo jack by Villacorta in the third inning, but Raffy didn’t look terrible and held the lead, which got a major boost in the fifth inning. Malkus and Waters reached the corners with one out, after which Crum’s single made it 4-1. Pucks struck out, but Tony Lopez got hold of a breaking ball and ka-chonked it some 445 feet to dead center for a hugely impressive 3-run homer, 7-1 …!! DuPlessis replaced another fallen starter at that point.

Raffy pitched on, walking Villacorta in the fifth and Rogers in the sixth – and nobody else, because Dr. Padilla saw something he didn’t like and went out to collect him right after that, with one gone in the bottom 6th. Alfaro got a double play grounder from Suggs eventually, which sugged for Atlanta, but I had seen that snuff movie before and was more concerned about our own problems. In the seventh, the Coons scored a run on a passed ball, but Alfaro also gave one back when Kirkwood socked a leadoff triple and scored on Angeletti’s sac fly, 8-2. Another run fell out of Vic Flores, who gave up straight hits to the 1-2-3 batters before Rogers’ sac fly and Suggs’ double play grounder (cough!) ended the inning. Perez doubled home Crum against Sam Geren in the ninth, but the Knights weren’t done rallying. Watson was back at it in the bottom 9th, put Kirkwood on with a single, and then was taken well deep to left with two outs by PH Pedro Almaguer. Hitchcock replaced him, but gave up another run on an Acosta double before finally getting the damn things into the books… 9-6 Raccoons. Malkus 2-5, 2 RBI; Crum 3-5, 2 2B, RBI; Puckeridge 4-5; Lopez 2-5, HR, 3 RBI; de la Cruz 5.1 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 4 K, W (5-2) and 1-3;

*Above* .500 …!!

No quick news on Raffy, so I cried all through the night and well into Sunday.

Game 3
POR: 3B Malkus – SS Lavorano – 2B Waters – 1B Ramsay – LF Crum – RF Puckeridge – C Gowin – CF Suzuki – P Baker
ATL: SS W. Acosta – 2B F. Alba – CF Alade – 1B J. Rogers – C S. Suggs – LF Kirkwood – RF Wada – 3B Villacorta – P E. Duran

Phil Baker got on the snout before his shoes were properly tied, as the Knights scored four runs in the bottom 1st. Acosta homered instantly, and two walks after that to Alba and Alade weren’t helping either. Baker was all over the place, Suggs drove in a run, Kirkwood drove home two, and Villacorta drew a 2-out walk before the inning ended with a Duran groundout. That was the last out that Baker got – he offered another two hits and two walks to begin the second inning and was kicked from the game. Alfaro was inserted for long relief and cleaned up behind Baker, stranding the two runners that hadn’t already scored in the 6-0 game. Instead, he was taken deep by Jushiro Wada in the third inning…

A Suzuki single in the fifth was the first hit off Duran, and it also brought in the first run for Portland, as Pucks scored from second, where he shouldn’t have been if Alba had fudged Gowin’s double play grounder for an error. The inning almost spiraled out of control for the Knights, with Malkus and Lonzo driving in three more runs, all unearned after a Perez strikeout in the #9 spot, but the inning fizzled out before the Coons could make it really close, 7-4. That was also where a procession of Cornejo, Sencion, and Hitchcock kept the Knights through eight innings, but the problem was with the offense also stopping to occur after that top of the fifth. For the three innings afterwards, no Raccoon reached base. It didn’t get better in the ninth – David Hardaway struck out Crum, Philipps, and Crispin in order. 7-4 Knights.

In other news

May 22 – The Crusaders tie the game at 9-9 in the ninth inning hosting the Canadiens, then take another nine innings to walk it off for a 10-9 victory in 18 innings – with the run being unearned to boot. Errors by Hyuma Hitomi (0-1, 0.00 ERA) and INF Landon Guillory (.267, 4 HR, 13 RBI) plus a walkoff single by New York’s Prince Gates (.297, 3 HR, 28 RBI) end the game after a mere 5:52.
May 24 – Loggers 1B/RF/LF Gaudencio Callaia (.324, 4 HR, 14 RBI) hits for the cycle in a 4-2 win over the Condors, going precisely 4-for-4 with a lone RBI, giving the Loggers back-to-back seasons with a cycle, after Chris Lowe did the same job in August of last season.
May 25 – The Gold Sox trade INF Rick Price (.277, 1 HR, 13 RBI) to the Pacifics for INF Brent Andrews (.227, 2 HR, 27 RBI) and #94 prospect C Ben Bodkin.
May 25 – Dallas sends SS/3B Alex Adame (.340, 0 HR, 11 RBI) and over $2M in cash to the Scorpions for three prospects.
May 25 – A broken hand will cost SAC C Tim Fuller (.227, 0 HR, 12 RBI) at least a month.

FL Player of the Week: SFW LF Mario Villa (.337, 3 HR, 27 RBI), batting .556 (15-27) with 1 HR, 9 RBI
CL Player of the Week: ATL 2B/SS Willie Acosta (.366, 2 HR, 5 RBI), batting .423 (11-26) with 2 HR, 3 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Let’s just say that Sunday start was the last for Baker for now. He’s off to the swamps – although we have to be careful with the Raffy situation still developing. Thankfully, Monday will be off, and then there’ll be three games in Vegas before a home set with the Thunder to close out the month. That’s the only home games for the time being – we’ll be on the road again the week after.

The offense seems to be picking up some steam. Through the last two weeks, they have scored 71 runs in 12 games, which is a lot. Now if only we could shore up the bullpen that never fails to make a 6-run game interesting again……

So, nothing major – just two starters and three relievers missing until we’re about competent in that regard.

Fun Fact: 34 years ago today, the Aces’ Brent Burke hit three home runs in an 8-1 win over the Indians.

At that point Burke was a very competent shortstop that looked like he’d have another five, six years in him, doing the deed on the Arrowheads just before his 30th birthday. He never won a Gold Glove and made only one All Star team, but he had led the CL with 41 doubles just the year prior, so there were things to like there.

Unbeknownst to anyone, he played his last ABL game just over a year later before hand and hamstring injuries relegated him to going unsigned in free agency and he lingered for another four years in the minor leagues without getting another call to the majors. All his career was spent with Vegas, him batting .280 with 70 HR and 439 RBI.