Yet Another OOTP6 Dynasty, Year 2: One Flew Over the Pale Hose

[canadiancreed]

Vernon Wells was the big midseason acquisition, picked up when Toronto had one of their little Canadian fits.

Excuse me, there's a certain GM that I have to beat into a gelatinous paste now. Be back in a few.....

[canadiancreed]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

Here is the best +1 of all.

proof that the apocolyspe is nigh!

[ifspuds]

*whistle*

Going the crafty veteran route, I see. I can see Scarborough for Podsednik. It's a calculated risk, but in a world of TINSTAAP (whether or not such a phenomenon is repeatable in OOTPworld) a guy with that kind of OBP with that sort of success rate in swipes is worth a 22-year old pitcher like Scarborough.

It's the Anderson, Gallo and Wing (mostly Anderson) for Cordero, Miller and Wikipedia that I'm not so sure about. It's really all about Miller, I guess. You say he was 8-15, 4.64 last year. What are his career numbers? I'm a little less cheerful about trading 25-year old OFs with some reasonable numbers and a bit of potential, especially for a 30-year old swingman making $4.8mil and two guys that aren't likely to help you much.

[Jestor]

If and when Scarborough Faire becomes a genuine ace pitcher and Hall of Famer, I'll be the first one to read you the riot act, Mr. Knox!

But OTOH, I can now watch him pitch every summer since Milwaukee's 30-45 min. away from my hometown.

As much as I dislike Anderson and think he's overrated IRL, all those veterans have me awful leery. IMO you should have picked up a young guy as well if at all possible. This trade to me is looking a little too much like a Marlins thing.

[Vris]

If I say I'm disappointed your gunning for it all this year, that would be stupid. If I said I was happy you traded away a complete stud who could be your rotation's anchor for the next 15 years, that wouuld be stupid too.

Hmm.

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by Vris

If I say I'm disappointed your gunning for it all this year, that would be stupid. If I said I was happy you traded away a complete stud who could be your rotation's anchor for the next 15 years, that wouuld be stupid too.

Hmm.

I feel the same way about the trade, you know, and I'm the one who actually made it.

Originally Posted by ifspuds

It's the Anderson, Gallo and Wing (mostly Anderson) for Cordero, Miller and Wikipedia that I'm not so sure about.

Right. This being OOTP, Scarborough for Podsednik just wouldn't fly on its own - I guess it was too perfect of a trade for the AI to be satisfied.

But that's the part of the trade that makes me consider self-immolation, actually. I am fine with selling high on Mike Gallo, whatever the return may be - and my gut tells me that Brian Anderson is being sold high, as well. Maybe it's a miscalculation, but look at the boy's minor league numbers:

YR/LEVEL	AB	AVG	OBP	SLG	BB/K
2004 (A)	463	.270	.346	.454	57/122
2004 (AA)	63	.190	.257	.222	6/13
2005 (AA)	182	.346	.374	.604	8/24
2005 (AAA)	291	.275	.326	.423	22/56
2006 (AAA)	355	.307	.370	.479	37/74
2007 (AAA)	36	.444	.487	.528	1/2

I am interested to know how you interpret them. He has some gaudy numbers in short stints, but I also see a guy without a significant strength - all things considered, average batting average, average plate discipline, average power, and not a ton of room between his head and the ceiling considering he is already 25 years old. And "And"(erson) did not seem capable of handling center field, so you are left praising the guy for his .284 batting average and 34 RBI. Dmitri Young played left field for the godawful Pale Hose last season, whacked hits at a .310 rate and slugged .448, mostly thanks to 40 doubles. If we can have a player like that in left field on a lousy team, who is to say we can't replace this Anderson guy next season, after Podsednik moves on? Certainly not me.

I also like Wade Miller as much as I can like any 8-15 pitcher.

YR	IP	H	BB	K	ERA
2004	204.2	166	62	200	3.34
2005	203.1	207	71	195	4.56
2006	207.1	203	64	176	4.64
2007	62.0	56	18	41	3.63

Usually ain't my type of guy, but I think it's silly to dismiss him based on one (OK, two) less than stellar seasons as Milwaukee did. Author's Note: League-average ERA was just a hair over four in the National League last year, and not much higher than that in '05, so those numbers really aren't very good. Doesn't faze me. Miller still hits the mid-90's on the radar gun more than just once a month and has a good habit of keeping his hard slider down in the zone. We have run into the occasional pitching problem over the last year-point-five because many of the men pitching for the Pale Hose:

1. didn't hit the mid-90's on the radar gun...like, ever. (Jon Rauch, Nate Cornejo, Marc Kaiser, Felix Diaz)
2. didn't have the good habit of keeping the ball in the strike zone, let alone down in the strike zone (Rick Ankiel, Jorge DePaula, Fabio Castro, Rick Hummel)

P.S. This year, Miller's won-lost is 5-4, so he's not really an 8-15 man anymore.

Maybe Chris Scarborough would have bucked the above trend; certainly the boy could bring the cheddar. But his control has led to some triple-A walk rates that are just OK; that's also been a major factor in a proliferation of home runs allowed that's a little less than OK. It's a mistake to part with a kid who probably had a double-digit strikeout rate in T-ball, but what the hey. Only live once, only have the chance at the 2007 AL Central crown once. That's basically why I didn't bother picking up a young whippersnapper in the deal; if I got up the cojones to make this deal, may as well make the deal. No half-assing it. If we're going for this division, then let's roll.

So here we are, rolling on. No looking back.

[cknox0723]

Oof, I see our boy has made his first start in Milwaukee and the line is a stellar one:

Milwaukee 	 	IP  H R ER BB K HR PI PS ERA
C. Scarborough (W, 1-0)	5.1 5 0 0  1  7 0  91 53 0.00

Time to roll back the file to the most recent backup. Claim the computer is virus-riddled, or even addled. Or maybe just pretend that I thought the cream & clear were vitamins when I made the trade.

Meanwhile, fictional Messrs. Podsednik, Miller, and Cordero will remain in DFA purgatory until our train reaches Kansas City on 7/23. They are coming from Los Angeles, you know!

[canadiancreed]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

Oof, I see our boy has made his first start in Milwaukee and the line is a stellar one:

Milwaukee 	 	IP  H R ER BB K HR PI PS ERA
C. Scarborough (W, 1-0)	5.1 5 0 0  1  7 0  91 53 0.00

Time to roll back the file to the most recent backup. Claim the computer is virus-riddled, or even addled. Or maybe just pretend that I thought the cream & clear were vitamins when I made the trade.

Meanwhile, fictional Messrs. Podsednik, Miller, and Cordero will remain in DFA purgatory until our train reaches Kansas City on 7/23. They are coming from Los Angeles, you know!

hey now, you made the trade, time to be burned by it

[zukes]

Good luck with the trade, I know I was one who was pushing for it. Let's get some games rolling.

[Jestor]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

Oof, I see our boy has made his first start in Milwaukee and the line is a stellar one:

Milwaukee 	 	IP  H R ER BB K HR PI PS ERA
C. Scarborough (W, 1-0)	5.1 5 0 0  1  7 0  91 53 0.00

Time to roll back the file to the most recent backup. Claim the computer is virus-riddled, or even addled. Or maybe just pretend that I thought the cream & clear were vitamins when I made the trade.

Meanwhile, fictional Messrs. Podsednik, Miller, and Cordero will remain in DFA purgatory until our train reaches Kansas City on 7/23. They are coming from Los Angeles, you know!

I feel vindicated now.

But do keep track of my man Scaborough's career, will you?

[Y0DA55]

I was on the fence with the trade, Craig. I ALWAYS have a hard time dealing young arms (as they are the hardest thing to find). But, you are playing for this year (because by the time you finish year three, three more versions of OOTP will have come out), and I hope the hose can hang on, because I think you just sacrificed your future there.

But, play for the present, because next year is a long ways away. Hope this works out! But I'll still be rooting for Scarbs.

[zukes]

That's weird because I find pitching is easy to find, I have more trouble finding power hitters.

[cknox0723]

That's weird because I find pitching is easy to find, I have more trouble finding power hitters.

Agreed, at least with the second part. Of course, then you ask, "Why trade for a guy who has never hit ten home runs before?" and to that I pray you choke on a banana.

[cknox0723]

The day of this swap of a future All-Star for a current one, the ballgame with Detroit seems almost secondary, but I guess the boys in Pale Hose missed the memo. The twenty-five year old right-hander Rich Harden has been an ace caliber pitcher ever since being acquired on July 31, '04, for a trio of prospects who have since flamed out, but he has slammed into the wall hard this year. Velocity is down, control is a bit off, and his sharp breaking pitches are as much a dullard as the inimitable ______ ______ whom I work with. This game, this outing is no different. Ramon Vazquez leads off with a single to right, Adam Kennedy strikes with a three-bagger to right-center, and Magglio Ordonez bashes a double. Just nine pitchers to only three batters, but there's a quick two runs. We add a slower two by the end of the inning and never look back behind the always-outstanding Mark Buehrle, who allows three runs over 84 pitches, only significant because nominal ace Harden allowed six runs and ten hits in three-and-a-third, half the time. Predictably, digging yourself such a hole ain't a great way to win a ballgame, and a spirited comeback against recent call-up Fabio Castro falls just a few miles short. 8-5, White side.

The next ballgame is another exercise in futility, as this time the Tigers try to win a game without scoring any runs. It fails...miserably. We don't scratch more than a few hits off over eight strong innings from another young right-hander in Beltran Perez, who had excellent command of the changeup on this afternoon delight. But we found our baby in the top half of the first inning when Adam Kennedy whacked a one-out double to right and Vernon Wells smacked a two-out ribbie base-knock over short. Jon Garland held onto her tight, tossing seven scoreless frames. How? When it's right, it's right. Perhaps any old reliever could close out a two-run lead against the clawless Tigers, but why wait until the middle of a cold dark night for the dynamic duo of Aki Otsuka and Joe Roa? They close the books on the two-zip ballgame and everything is a little clearer in the light of day, at least on this day.

We know the night is always gonna be there anyway, but maybe night will never fall on this team. Dynamic outfielder Podsednik and veteran infielder Cordero (whose 15 home runs would lead the team) and pitcher Miller meet the team back in the Second City, where the Royals are in town for a trio. Esteban, the singularly-named veteran right-hander, quickly disposes of the visitors in the first half-frame and then it is time for the new lineup to make hay against 35 year old Todd Ritchie, once a half-decent pitcher who now has a good shot at losing 17 for a second consecutive season.

So maybe that is why Ramon Vazquez draws a walk to start the home half and then ideal leadoff man Podsednik, batting second, triples into the right field corner in his first American League at-bat, making it one-nothing. Yes, it is because of the pitcher, not Magglio Ordonez, that our #3 man hits a long fly ball out to right-center to plate "Pods." And Eric Munson's four-bagger a dozen pitches and an out later ain't because he's a blue ox-man, but because the right-hander on the mound is movement-shy and gopher-prone.

Munson's prodigious two-run blast with two outs in the fifth that puts the game on five-nothing ice is certainly because of his massive biceps, though. It helps that this Ritchie fellow offers us extra helpings of hard fastballs right down center street...but these Pale Hose fellows are winning at a rate you would have scoffed at last year because they can play:

7/1/2007: L 5-4 @ TOR - RHRP J. Roa (4-3) blows one-run lead provided by PH E. Munson's eighth-inning firecracker (#13)
7/2: W 4-2 vs. TB - A third inning rain delay wreaks havoc on The Cell; we emerge victorious thanks to three strong innings from RHRP Bevis (1-2)
7/3: L 5-1 vs. TB - One pitcher allows nine hits in six innings and the other allows one, but Joe Roa (4-4) melts down in the seventh and 1B Phelps's grand slam ignites the fire.
7/4: W 5-3 vs. TB - OF Raul Gonzalez hits a third inning home run to erase a 3-1 deficit and LHRP "Wild Thing" Ankiel gets the win by tossing scoreless frames four and five.
7/6: W 4-3 vs. MIN - INF Branyan (now in AAA due to a .113/.284/.208 line in 53 AB) hits his only HR this year off of RP Beltran in the eighth to break a 3-3 tie.
7/7: W 5-1 vs. MIN - Esteban carries a no-hitter into the sixth and a shutout into the ninth. He falls short once and then twice, but RF "Buddha" Ordonez's 3-run HR (12) in the fifth is enough compensation.
7/8: W 4-3 vs. MIN - Ryan Franklin, age 35, 20 starts and an 8-6 record in the last two seasons, matches the six strong innings from 29 year old Ben Sheets, 54 starts and an 18-16 mark. Rule 5 pick Beltran blows another one despite the nice ~2.50 ERA - this time the run is inherited, as PH Olivo doubles off left-hander Fultz to plate Catalanotto with one out in the eighth.
7/9: W 5-3 vs. TB - CF Wells smashes a three-run sixth-inning double in his first game with the club.
7/10: W 3-1 vs. TB - 26 year old RHSP Nannini was throwing AAA this time two months ago, but he throws a complete game, two-hit shutout and strikes out nine Devil Rays on this warm night. RHSP S. McClung is his usual wild self - this year, it has been effective (7-7 W-L, 3.11 ERA); last year he was 8-18. Three hits, four walks and three runs over six just wasn't enough this time.
7/11: W 3-0 vs. TB - They can't hit Nannini. You really think they're going to hit LH Ace Buehrle, with a career record thirty games above .500?
7/12: OFF
7/13: RHRP Calero (not pictured) went to the All-Star game and I hope he had a good time watching. CF Wells got to play a little bit, but having only three games with our club at this point, he was really a representative for Toronto. Maybe if he'd gone three-for-three and not oh-fer, I would claim him, too.
7/14: BURNISHED
7/15: day after previous
7/16: L 3-1 vs. BAL - Ace Buehrle, still miffed about missing the grandiose ballgame a few days prior, throws up a real stinker - 8 IP, 3 H, 1 BB, 7 K, 2 R. Somehow he ends up on the losing side anyway.
7/17: W 6-3 vs. BAL - SUCK ON THAT MARYLAND ******S
7/18: W 4-3 (11) vs. BAL - And this one, too. The club's six (6) defensive changes in the eighth inning did not help down the stretch. But RHRP Bauer should not have thrown a fat one to #3 hitter Ordonez with the winning run at third in the bottom of the eleventh.
7/19: W 5-4 @ DET - RHSP Ryan Franklin (5-3, 2.97) scatters seven hits over five; RHSP Suppan (9-7, 2.76) is not so lucky - SS Vazquez's two doubles and LF Catalanotto's tater (6) were the guilty parties. LH"RP" Ankiel gets cuffed around but RHRP Roa sneaks out of the eighth with the lead and mo's 'em down in the ninth.
7/20: W 4-1 @ DET - Yet another good outing from this Nannini guy (5-2, 2.75) - 7 IP, 5 H, 0 BB, 6 K, 1 R. 1B Catalanotto brings home two on a first-inning triple and smacks three hits in the four at-bats that follow.

Add on the few paragraphs at the beginning and you've reached the present, 7/24/2007. We are an astounding 15-3 in this July month and are six games up in the division, and a half-game above the Empire for the best record in all of baseball.

This is not a .592 team, not when they have had 18 more games at home than on the road and not when they lost 93 last year. But this is not that same lousy ballclub, either, so it would be one hell of a miserable fiasco if the threads unraveled down the stretch.

[zukes]

Whoo-hoo, Go Sox!

[BadluckinOOTP]

You should have looked into getting a bonafide flamethrower (not named Rick Ankiel) for your bullpen in one of those trades. A Ryan Wagner, or Octavio Dotel, or someone along those lines.

Or Mike Stanton.

His teams are always good.

Why the hell don't you have Mike Stanton?

[BadluckinOOTP]

dola,

Get Jeff Nelson too while you're at it.

Thanks!

[zukes]

The same Jeff Nelson that gave up the dinger to Hillenbrand on Saturday that nearly caused Ozzie Guillen's head to explode?

[The Funk]

Bloody hell!

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

But this is not that same lousy ballclub, either, so it would be one hell of a miserable fiasco if the threads unraveled down the stretch.

7/24/07: KC 13, @CHW 3

Kansas City right fielder Greg Norton's two-run single with two outs in the top of the first inning put the Pale Hose in a quick deficit, but that would pale in comparison to what was to come. Right-hander Ryan Franklin (5-4) was able to man the batallions and fight the good fight for a few frames, but Kansas City hit the royal flush with an eight-run fourth that included three home runs. Left fielder Abraham Nunez followed up Irving Falu's leadoff walk with a big fly to right that just kept carrying, his eighth round-tripper of the season, and a free pass to opposing moundsman Rodrigo Lopez (2-3) was the straw that would break Franklin's back a second time. Speedsters Henry Mateo and Rich Thompson dinked and dunked their way on with one-base hits that loaded up the bases, and then the incomparable Mike Sweeney unloaded them by dinking one off of the left field foul pole. Right fielder Norton followed with another four-bagger, bringing on left-hander Fabio Castro from the Chicago bullpen. He'd stop the home run onslaught, but not the run-scoring, and the three lonely tallies by the home side were as satisfying as asparagus salad to a vampire.

Wade Miller made his debut for our ballclub, retired the first six he faced without any trouble (save a few line drives right back at him), and then got chased in his third inning of work when four consecutive batters reached, the fourth being the flipping pitcher Lopez on a fecking walk. Apparently, as a starter, he makes a hell of a reliever.

PJ Bevis, who throws hard stuff from the side, relieved and pitched a scoreless inning, but I guess his 10 ball to 8 strike ratio demonstrates why BadluckinOOTP posited that we need a reliever. Perhaps he is forgetting All-Star reliever (TM) Kiko Calero; he tossed the last two frames of a ten-run loss because he is an All-Star, and it would've been embarassing to lose by twenty runs like we did that one time last year. Also, there was really no one else to pitch.

I guess the point has been made, maybe we do need a reliever, but Jeff Nelson is retired in this universe and Mike Stanton is pitching in Saint Louis and very poorly, at that. Even worse is that I think we have run out of guys to trade.

But how big an impact will a reliever have over two months, anyway? Suppose the twenty-five or thirty innings they pitch are all in very important games, and this hypothetical pitcher is some grand success, giving up maybe a half of an earned run or a fully earned walk or trot. That's fantastic and maybe that will give us the division title, but surely the guy he replaces will have been a grand success at least a few of those times, and Roa, Otsuka et al. really ain't that bad - they would probably succeed more than just "a few" times. And that could well be enough for the division anyway.

I won't look into Wagner, who has 77 saves and a 3.48 career ERA at age 25, but also walks about six per nine innings like Ankiel. And I know I should have thought about signing Seattle's brilliant relief ace Dotel two years ago when the opportunity was there, but enough already!

Originally Posted by cknox0723 on 10/2/2004

Tavy Dotel is more fun to say than Octavio, so I'll do that when talking about his 0.93 ERA and 18 saves [at the 2006 All-Star Break]. Remind me why I didn't sign him for $3 million pennies a year, by the way? Oh...bone chips. Forgot. Yeah, that's definitely affected him this year. Definitely.

The 33 year old southpaw Ray King would be an ideal fit, as he totes a long line of earned run averages around three, a fastball that registers at 95 on the gun, and a birthplace from a little town in Illinois. Unfortunately the Evil Fishies won't give the Chicago native up, but that is just as well. If I traded any more prospects, our minor league clubs wouldn't be able to field a team.

But we're five games up in the division, peeps, with 63 to play.

[The Funk]

There's quite a talented young pitcher playing for minnesota, can't remember his name. Could be ready to break into the majors with some relief work. Might be worth looking into.

[cknox0723]

7/25

Mark Buehrle (9-5, 2.79) says he is ready to go despite being just three days removed from a six inning, 84 pitch outing in an 8-5 victory over the hapless Felines. There is an off day on the schedule tomorrow, and Michael Nannini (5-2, 2.68) has been less than stellar working in regular rotation - both of his losses have come on 4-day rest, and his lone win under such a scenario was only a five-inning start. The 26 year old lad has been brilliant otherwise, so it makes sense to play those odds and go with Buehrle in this one, especially with a tough opponent in fellow southpaw Jimmy Gobble (7-4, 3.75). Fun Fact: Gobble's matchup against Jon Garland in some meaningless game last year inspired the irresistable nickname "Jon Moo." Don't believe me? Click here.

Unfortunately our strapping southpaw throws up a stinker that "Jon Moo" would be proud of. Buehrle's hit early, not recording an out until the fifth batter of the first inning. He's hit late, giving up a couple more runs in his last inning of work, the fifth, and he's even hit by Kansas catcher Chad Moeller, as the .215 hitter takes Buehrle's third pitch of the second inning up and way, way out over the left-center field wall for his first big fly of the season. But more than anything, "The Buehrle One" just wasn't in this go-round; 106 pitches and six walks in five innings, one start after a six-inning, 84-pitch gem?

Should've gone to Nannini. As it turns out, that's the man who replaces Buehrle...just so the right-hander can get some work in. The opposing pitcher Gobble is the first man he faces, and after taking ball one high and ball two wide...crack, a base hit for the pitcher. Of course it leads to more runs, ones that we come nowhere near matching.

Buk bawk! It's like a bad joke, this team getting white-hot, enough so that I push all the chips in and make the big trade. Now all of a sudden we are cold fish, and with another Cleveland win, just four games up in the division. One of their many young right-handers, "Dirk" Dittler, evened his record at 8-8 with seven-plus shutout innings. Dave Riske tallied his twenty-second save and that was made possible by RBI hits in the third and fifth by number three hitter and right fielder "Odysseus" Gerut.

The rain dance is working for the Tribe, but not here. Even getting a few solid innings out of Nannini after his sixth-inning debacle was no solace; plating two runs in the ninth to make the final score three-seven was just frustrating. These off-days down the stretch should help to ensure that we're on, but this club has gone from hot to not in a matter of two games, and now I'm just happy we won't lose another one tomorrow.

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by The Funk

There's quite a talented young pitcher playing for minnesota, can't remember his name. Could be ready to break into the majors with some relief work. Might be worth looking into.

Here is a bit of levity after two rough losses...a dynasty entirely written in vague, generalized descriptions.

"Played a game today. Men ran onto the field wearing gloves, one dressed as though he was an astronaut. Another man waved a big hunk of lumber and slashed it viciously through the air when a little white ball came flying at him. The ball traveled very fast in many different directions. Spectators cheered. At the end, everyone went home."

A slightly more esoteric slant at an off-field event:

"Swapped with a team in the other sub-league for a player to man the outfield, and only gave up a five-star in A-ball, aged 25. He won't reach his prodigious talents. Haha, what a steal! Heap upon me praise, and deride Schuerholz and Beane for never thinking up such a brilliant trade. Thwap will go the ball off this 83-76-55-64-87's bat, and with a flash of leather and a clap of thunder, Gold Gloves will fan upon his chiseled 87-99-78 physique."

"omg great trade! p\/\/4ge! what ratings r u using?

thx keep up the good work!!! go team go!"

"Thanks for your reply. I am using a scale of ten for other ratings and 2-8 for batting and pitching. Also I change the AI weights by 3.7% in descending alphabetical order every month. I feel this provides the most realistic assessment of what a major league GM would have to face and thus maximises my gaming experience.

Here is a bump to remind myself to update."

Finally, the vague, generalized signup thread - where YOUR PACKAGE OF BINARY DIGITS, too, can be a star:

"Love metsgeek's threads so wanted to start another one. Please remember to submit your ratings in Morse Code in the signup thread. Here is the newest update:

The Funk, your player was in A-ball.
ifspuds, your pitcher played since he is on a really bad team. And he even won one!
Vris, your player was released and is playing for the free agents now. No stats listed. "

[cknox0723]

Also, the very. very vague, somewhat encoded Pale Hose thread:

Originally Posted by The Funk

There's quite a talented young pitcher playing for minnesota, can't remember his name. Could be ready to break into the majors with some relief work. Might be worth looking into.

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Francisco Liriano trading in-division bad too wild, anyway """""""""""""""" Loaiza sucks 24-1 24-1 24-1 24-1 24-1 24-1 24-1 trade.

I am in rare form tonight, I think. Too bad I work the morning shift these days.

[Vris]

Those are two of the most hilarious posts I have ever seen back to back.

Craig, you rule.

[The Funk]

What the hell does all that mean?

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by The Funk

What the hell does all that mean?

It means we have an off-day. Also that I had an 11-hour shift to work.

7/26

The concern for Pale Hose faithful should be with division rivals Cleveland, who won a drawn-out pitcher's duel two to one over New York today on a thirteenth inning double steal followed by a sacrifice fly by fifth outfielder Coco Crisp. Our idleness allows the red-hot Tribe to slide within three-and-a-half of first place, the closest they've been since the calendar read June.

I'd be a fool not to be a little anxious that we're about to blow this thing, but I am the guy who thought it was a good idea to sign a 38 year old Piazza, after all. So instead I am preoccupied with giving thanks...

- Thanks, OOTP gods, for going all Iowa Baseball Confederacy on the Empire and not on our team. It's bad enough that the Yankees lost a long one to Cleveland, but it's borderline pitiful when you consider they were on the short end of a 21 inning game in Texas one day earlier.

There was a ballgame improbable enough after nine frames; the visiting Yankees erased an eight-three seventh inning deficit with four in the eighth off of a quartet of relievers and three more in the ninth, all off of Proven Closer (TM) John Smoltz...and then occasional closer Jay Powell blew it in the bottom of the ninth. All-Star 1B Teixeira connected on a one-out, run-scoring double and pinch-hitter Andrew Wishy, the 24 year old backup outfielder, cracked a line drive to right-center to tie the game two batters later. Another pinch-hitter, the young infielder Micah Furtado, stepped in then and there with the chance to win it, but his bouncer to second sent the game to extra innings.

Twelve innings later, somebody press the reset button and Furtado got his chance at a do-over in his fifth at-bat of the game, facing 24 year old southpaw Frederick Banta with Dave Dellucci at second representing the winning run. On a 2-1 fastball clocked at 87 miles per hour, the youngster took his hack and socked a line drive over shortstop; left fielder Randy Winn's throw was predictably feeble and Dellucci slid into home to give the home team the W in your garden-variety 11-10, 21-inning ballgame. Right-hander Dewon Brazelton threw nine shutout innings in relief to improve his record to eight and seven. Banta's first major-league loss came in a relief outing where he battled his control terribly, walking eight...while pitching seven-and-two-thirds innings. Mark Teixeira, the number five batter for Texas, was more productive in one ballgame than I think Juan uribe was for the Pale Hose all last year - the Texas 1B was five for ten with a double, a home run, and five runs batted in. Shortstop Fred Bynum was oh-for-nine with three strikeouts to lower his season batting line to .181. 1B Jason Giambi was four for ten for the Empire, coming a triple short of the cycle, but despite his ninth-inning heroics (a go-ahead two-run HR off of Smoltz), the Yankees still fell short. It just took the length of two-plus regular ballgames to earn that one loss. And then the thirteen-inning loss to Cleveland.
Karma.

- Also, I must thank the OOTP gods for not allowing the 24 year old southpaw Jay Marshall of Seattle to become a star. Sent to the left coast in the trade that ridded us of craptastic infielder Juan Uribe and gave us next to nothing (AAA 3B Shea Hillenbrand) in return, Marshall was just a young, left-handed afterthought. And why not? Certainly a man who has never pitched to better than a .500 record in three years at AA would be a beforethought, and even if his strikeout rate had improved, this kid allowed 37 runs in 39 innings (8 starts) in a late-season AAA call-up. Not worth a thought in the slightest.

But spring-training work with pitching coach Rod Metzger gave Marshall a new weapon this year, a circle changeup, and his always-solid control remained while the hit rate dropped precipitously as batters had to contend with something besides flaming cheddar and still-steaming splitters. In 18 AAA starts, Marshall's won-los was a lukewarm 8-7, but his earned run average was a dazzling 2.39, second in all of mythical AAA land behind only San Diego's Matt Bruback. Finally tired of journeyman John Halama's piddling results, the major-league version of Jay Marshall was born on the fourth of July and there were fireworks a'plenty after his dazzling debut over Oakland, seven innings of shutout ball with seven strikeouts, more than enough for the W.

Since then, Marshall's made three starts and not made it through five innings in any of them. It is not a lack of stamina, but a lack of precision, as the left-hander has been forcibly removed thanks to an inability to control the big hit - five home runs allowed and five doubles in 90 or so batters faced. Sure, the kid is four starts into his young career and could still be an astronaut for all we know, but it would have been awfully painful to watch him carve up the American League at the very beginning of his career.

- Last but not least, thanks to the OOTP gods for not forcing me to watch Chris Scarborough carve up the league at the very beginning of his career. The former #3 overall pick, traded just a few short weeks ago in an all-in move to gun for the pennant, got a win in his ML debut with five-plus shutout innings and seven Dodger strikeouts, but as the kid proved in his second start, he is not really the Milwaukee ace, not yet. He put his ballclub in a quick first-inning hole against Saint Louis thanks to two walks and two stolen bases, and then left a hittable fastball out over the plate to cleanup man Jose Guillen, who thumped it to left-center to make it 2-0, visitors. Right fielder Trot Nixon followed suit with a liner into the corner and 3-0 was a hole that had grown to 4-0 after two innings, again catalyzed by Marlon Anderson getting on base and then stealing a base. This time the other Saint Louis outfielder, veteran Mike Tucker, got the RBI, though his was just on a simple looper over the infield.

Milwaukee battled back in the bottom of the second, aided by a fielding error by Guillen, and Scarborough's first major-league hit, a two-out single, cut the lead in half. And then suddenly it was all gone, as another former Pale Hose guy in right fielder Brian Anderson had jumped all over a hanging breaker and crushed it to straightaway center for a two-run tater. Third baseman Casey Blake poked a single to keep the inning alive, #3 hitter and Ordonez soundalike Geoff Jenkins cracked a double to right-center, and the home team had the edge, five to four. Scarborough breezed through the third, fourth, and fifth without pause, retiring nine in a row and allowing just one ball out of the infield, a harmless fly out. But an Alex Gonzalez double with one out in the top of the sixth would be followed by a Scott Rolen long ball to left, chasing Scarborough from the ballgame for good with his team again behind. They'd come back to tie in the ninth and actually win it in the tenth on a second error by Jose Guillen, but it's apparent that Milwaukee's dividends from the big trade won't begin to really pay off for some time.

P.S. Thanks of course to Vris and The Funk, spuds and BadluckinOOTP, orin2 and zukes and Y0DA and all of the other great folks who come up with such great and frequent replies.

[Vris]

Frequent reply!

[zukes]

speaking of frequent replies....

+1

[zukes]

Bump.

Also, any plans to move this to OOTP2006?

Any plans for an update?

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by zukes

Bump.

Gracias.

Also, any plans to move this to OOTP2006?

Yeah, eventually. I have seen 2006 in all its glory thanks to the only OOTP-playing pal I have in this zip code (sorry, Mississauga is a long, lonely flight). It's really ambitious, which is kind of awe-inspiring, but I think it is just too unpolished right now. The play-by-play is choppy, and that will kill me, simming as slow as I do. There seem to be many issues with waivers and generally poor off-field AI; I have found some consistency with 6.12 so I will stick with that for now.

But I dare to dream about running the independent Atlantic League in conjunction with my Pale Hose league.

Any plans for an update?

Sure, one's comin' up. I would have had one earlier but unfortunately I have been in this padded room for the past two weeks. Here is a tip - if you are going to wander around the streets late at night half-clothed, mutter something other than "Scarborough, Scarborough, Scarborough" over and over, 'cause ain't no cop gonna think that's your dog's name.

[cknox0723]

7/27 - 7/29

Infielder Dave Berg of Toronto and Roseville, CA is just another ballplayer in this universe. There are so many others sort of like him that you'd be excused if you lost track, even if the guy is hitting a career high .292 at a spritely young age. But while Berg is as unremarkable as his below-average .317 on-base percentage, crazy Canadian management has thrust him into a remarkable circumstance. A more enterprising sort could make a sitcom out of it, complete with stereotypical sitcom neighbor who would scream out at inappropriate moments how much Berg really SUCKS at everything from laying down the sacrifice to simply breathing air like the rest of us ("Suck it in, *******, come on now! Now breathe OUT!").

But maybe this wonderful OOTP game is screaming that in its own way, because the thirty-six year old will be stuck in fourth-place Canadian purgatory for at least the remainder of the season, since the powers above him have decided against a trade to the FIRST-PLACE Pale Hose for young outfielder Clinton King (.320, 13 HR in 165 AAA AB, .235/.279/.348 in 115 in MLB). Coming thisclose to playing on a contender yet seeing it go awry might be punishment enough, but the real kick in the pants is that Berg lost his starting shortstop's spot two weeks ago when Toronto received 22 year old former All-Star BJ Upton as their end of a three-way deal.

So he's resigned to sitting the bench for the majority of his club's three-game set with (hey!) the Pale Hose, and if Berg has become a masochist and is actively rooting against his own ballclub, it ends up well for all involved.

The game on Thursday 7/27 goes into the books as a 4-3 victory for the good guys on the home team. Unfortunately Jon Garland's seven-inning, two run effort isn't enough to get him credit for the W; a solo home run to right field by pinch-hitter Russ Adams with one out in the ninth sullies what would have been a three-to-two ballgame. Hypothetical scapegoat Joe Roa (5-4) ends up with a win on the ledger and in the sappiest of scenarios. 39 year old Frank Thomas, batting .163/.218/.287 and one-for-22 this month, singles over a drawn-in infield with none out in the bottom of the ninth to bring home Jack Wilson and give occasional closer Geoff Geary the black mark on his record (though mop-up man Kip Wells, who started the inning, gets the loss).

The next day, the B.J.'s get a laugh when our moundsman Esteban Loaiza drops his season record to 10-5 with a kind demonstration of his keen poise of "The Art of Suck." It is vintage Esteban, the Loaiza of a year and 300,000 posts ago - 4.2 IP, 8 H, 4 R, 6 BB, 6 K, 107 pitches. To get the W, all opposing right-hander Brad Penny (7-6, 3.96) really has to do is stay on the mound; he goes one step further by poking one-base hits in the second, fourth, and fifth innings to provide himself with more than enough cushion so that the three runs he allows are no big deal. The final score is only five to three, Canadians, but the opposing side's parade of batters (42) and stolen bases (4) more properly reflect their dominance, or more accurately Esteban's predisposition to **** the bed once in a while.

But the rubber match is the Pale Hose coup de grace, for the twelfth time out of nineteen this season. The 34 year old twice-repaired Ryan Franklin defies the odds and the dinky opposing singles for seven innings, though as Jason Davis (6-9, 4.02) goes above & beyond Franklin's performance, it looks as though the enhanced Arkansasian would come up on the short end for the fifth time this year. But Frank Catalanotto's two-run round-tripper with two out in the eighth swings the pendulum back in our favor...yet only temporarily, as again a pinch-hitter is Joe Roa's undoing. This time it is 25 year old Scott Thorman, "Delgado's Legs" if such a moniker would ever spread. (As Carlos has only missed three games this season and is fourth in the AL in home runs at age 35, I doubt it) Thorman may not have a nickname, but we feel Thor(man)'s wrath when his two-out single to right ties up another low-scorer, three-three.

But once again, Scylla and Charybdis get dually decapitated in the ninth. Aqui Lopez starts the inning by plunking pinch-hitter Wil Cordero, bringing on semi-proven closer Geoff Geary. Scintillating slash hitters Vazquez and Podsednik make quick outs, but bopping outfielders Ordonez and Wells don't, and their consecutive singles plate pinch-runner Miguel Olivo and send the home crowd bounding ward happily.

[rem]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

7/27 - 7/29

Infielder Dave Berg of Toronto and Roseville, CA is just another ballplayer in this universe. There are so many others sort of like him that you'd be excused if you lost track, even if the guy is hitting a career high .292 at a spritely young age. But while Berg is as unremarkable as his below-average .317 on-base percentage, crazy Canadian management has thrust him into a remarkable circumstance. A more enterprising sort could make a sitcom out of it, complete with stereotypical sitcom neighbor who would scream out at inappropriate moments how much Berg really SUCKS at everything from laying down the sacrifice to simply breathing air like the rest of us ("Suck it in, *******, come on now! Now breathe OUT!").

But maybe this wonderful OOTP game is screaming that in its own way, because the thirty-six year old will be stuck in fourth-place Canadian purgatory for at least the remainder of the season, since the powers above him have decided against a trade to the FIRST-PLACE Pale Hose for young outfielder Clinton King (.320, 13 HR in 165 AAA AB, .235/.279/.348 in 115 in MLB). Coming thisclose to playing on a contender yet seeing it go awry might be punishment enough, but the real kick in the pants is that Berg lost his starting shortstop's spot two weeks ago when Toronto received 22 year old former All-Star BJ Upton as their end of a three-way deal.

So he's resigned to sitting the bench for the majority of his club's three-game set with (hey!) the Pale Hose, and if Berg has become a masochist and is actively rooting against his own ballclub, it ends up well for all involved.

The game on Thursday 7/27 goes into the books as a 4-3 victory for the good guys on the home team. Unfortunately Jon Garland's seven-inning, two run effort isn't enough to get him credit for the W; a solo home run to right field by pinch-hitter Russ Adams with one out in the ninth sullies what would have been a three-to-two ballgame. Hypothetical scapegoat Joe Roa (5-4) ends up with a win on the ledger and in the sappiest of scenarios. 39 year old Frank Thomas, batting .163/.218/.287 and one-for-22 this month, singles over a drawn-in infield with none out in the bottom of the ninth to bring home Jack Wilson and give occasional closer Geoff Geary the black mark on his record (though mop-up man Kip Wells, who started the inning, gets the loss).

The next day, the B.J.'s get a laugh when our moundsman Esteban Loaiza drops his season record to 10-5 with a kind demonstration of his keen poise of "The Art of Suck." It is vintage Esteban, the Loaiza of a year and 300,000 posts ago - 4.2 IP, 8 H, 4 R, 6 BB, 6 K, 107 pitches. To get the W, all opposing right-hander Brad Penny (7-6, 3.96) really has to do is stay on the mound; he goes one step further by poking one-base hits in the second, fourth, and fifth innings to provide himself with more than enough cushion so that the three runs he allows are no big deal. The final score is only five to three, Canadians, but the opposing side's parade of batters (42) and stolen bases (4) more properly reflect their dominance, or more accurately Esteban's predisposition to **** the bed once in a while.

But the rubber match is the Pale Hose coup de grace, for the twelfth time out of nineteen this season. The 34 year old twice-repaired Ryan Franklib defies the odds and the dinky opposing singles for seven innings, though as Jason Davis (6-9, 4.02) goes above & beyond Franklin's performance, it looks as though the enhanced Arkansasian would come up on the short end for the fifth time this year. But Frank Catalanotto's two-run round-tripper with two out in the eighth swings the pendulum back in our favor...yet only temporarily, as again a pinch-hitter is Joe Roa's undoing. This time it is 25 year old Scott Thorman, "Delgado's Legs" if such a moniker would ever spread. (As Carlos has only missed three games this season and is fourth in the AL in home runs at age 35, I doubt it) Thorman may not have a nickname, but we feel Thor(man)'s wrath when his two-out single to right ties up another low-scorer, three-three.

But once again, Scylla and Charybdis get dually decapitated in the ninth. Aqui Lopez starts the inning by plunking pinch-hitter Wil Cordero, bringing on semi-proven closer Geoff Geary. Scintillating slash hitters Vazquez and Podsednik make quick outs, but bopping outfielders Ordonez and Wells don't, and their consecutive singles plate pinch-runner Miguel Olivo and send the home crowd bounding ward happily.

^^^ Talent I have not

[The Funk]

Originally Posted by cknox0723

It is not a lack of stamina, but a lack of precision, as the left-hander has been forcibly removed thanks to an ability to control the big hit - five home runs allowed and five doubles in 90 or so batters faced.

Inability?

P.S. Thanks of course to The Funk who comes up with such great and frequent replies.

I got thanked, I got thanked, I got thanked, I got thanked, I got thanked, I got thanked, I got thanked, I got thanked, I got thanked, I got thanked, I got thanked. I am officially better than all of you.

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by The Funk

Inability?

Right. Also the phrase "34 year old twice-repaired Ryan Franklib" that you can see in the previous post's quote, it was not some sort of political thrust but a mere typo.

I fixed it, I fixed it, I am better than all of you.

[cknox0723]

7/30

What do you say about a game with an eight to one score after three innings are in the books? If you're Santa Barbara City College on 2/4/06, you wax philosophical about slugfests and victorious comebacks.

If you're the Pale Hose circa 2007, you're golden, especially with $50 million man Mark Buehrle on the hill against a mediocre Minnesota offense. He coasts through another third of the game before making way for little lefty Fabio Castro, who wriggles three hitless innings out of that bronzed left wing.

The right-handed starter for the home half, Doug Waechter, saw his season record drop to one below .500 and his career mark to just one above the break-even mark with this two-plus inning outing, his shortest of the season. Chicago Leadoff man Vazquez did much damage, reaching base all five times up, with three singles and two walks, and double play partner Kennedy went 2-4 with a double and three runs scored batting in the seventh hole. Cleanup man Vernon Wells provided the one big punch of the game with a three-run third inning home run that ultimately chased Waechter, but the dozens of little Pale Hose jabs (13 hits, 7 walks) would have been more than enough for a technical knockout.

[cknox0723]

7/31

Interview with the manager after the ballgame:

On getting an asskicking, a final score of 5-3 in favor of the third-place Twins, who were up three-zip after 2

It's happened so infrequently this season that I'd almost forgotten how easily it elicits a display of frustration. Makes you want to unleash some Satanical chant..."111111-one-1111111111-one-11111" to get it out of your system.

On the losing pitcher, right-hander Mike Nannini (5-3), who needed 100 pitches to just barely eke out a five-inning start

Nannini's stuff just wasn't dancing today like it usually is. I patted 'im on the butt just before and said he must've forgot the Viagra today. The kid laughed, so I think we'll keep 'im for a few more starts.

On winning pitcher Ben Sheets (11-5), who allowed three runs (none earned) in eight innings

Sure, the boy's fastball was hopping and we couldn't touch his curve, but you have to remember this is a guy who's gone six starts without allowing a walk, and our guys walked twice. Kid's fanned a dozen on more than one occasion, and we only had 6 K's today. We're gettin' around to him. Just wait 'til he comes to town on December 19th.

On the losing side's three-run sixth inning rally that fell short when Frank Catalanotto bounced to third base to end the inning

I'm always telling Frank that he shouldn't be hitting the ball where the fielders are. Don't know why that boy don't listen.

On tology

I Kant explain it, but I know it when I see it.

On the organization standing pat as the trade deadline approached and then passed by

We've picked up some All-Star players already in Wells and Podsednik and some other seasoned pros. This is the ballclub we're going to win with.

Quite a proclamation there. I hope this guy knows what he's talking about.

[The Funk]

Ben ****ing Sheets

[DAL 9000]

Auuuugh. The Kant pun... auuuuugh. For shame!

[cknox0723]

Originally Posted by DAL, back from the dead by reincarnation?

Auuuugh. The Kant pun... auuuuugh. For shame!

Sorry, can't resist sometimes. Trust that it is not just cknox0723 who does that, but also the guy behind the OOTPD username. It is part of my charm.

Originally Posted by The Funk

Ben ****ing Sheets

Agreed. However, I was surprised to learn that Sheets is actually just 4-4 against us since the Pale Hose became...the Pale Hose. One of these days, I will do a little digging and see who is actually worth of the nickname *******.