[Westheim]

Raccoons (20-15) vs. Indians (16-21) – May 15-18, 2028

Last in runs scored, second in runs conceded, the 2028 Indians looked a lot like the Indians of old in the 80s and 90s. God, I am ancient. Anyway… their offense was so putrid they were barely scored 3.3 runs per game and had a -19 run differential, so even that good a pitching staff could not keep them afloat in the division. They entered the series in last place, five games behind the Raccoons. This was the first series between the two teams this season. The Raccoons had won the season series five years in a row, but never by more than an 11-7 total, and only 10-8 last year.

Projected matchups:
George James (2-2, 5.50 ERA) vs. David Elliott (0-3, 6.39 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (2-0, 1.33 ERA) vs. Andy Bressner (3-4, 3.78 ERA)
Dan Delgadillo (2-2, 5.82 ERA) vs. David Saccoccio (3-3, 2.30 ERA)
Mark Roberts (3-3, 3.99 ERA) vs. John McInerney (3-3, 3.69 ERA)

Right-handers in the middle, left-handers at the ends for this series. Meanwhile, George James was pitching for his job in the opener, but he was not the only one. Kyle Anderson had to be activated by Wednesday.

Game 1
IND: SS Pizano – C Dear – 1B Jon Gonzalez – CF Suhay – LF Plunkett – 3B C. Castro – RF Aleman – 2B Boggs – P D. Elliott
POR: SS Stalker – 2B Spencer – RF Booker – 3B Hereford – 1B Gomez – LF Morales – C Leal – CF Magallanes – P James

The Raccoons did absolutely nothing with those wooden sticks to begin the week, but at least managed to lose Jarod Spencer to an injury incurred on the base paths right in the first inning. German Sanchez took over, exactly the type of batter you wanted in the #2 hole. Meanwhile the Indians had Jon Gonzalez batting third. .255 and two homers in the middle of May was a far cry from his 2026 postseason heroics, but the same could be said for Kevin Harenberg, really. James held the Indians at bay for four innings before a Rich Hereford error provoked sharp base hits by Alex Aleman (double) and, following Robby Boggs' sac fly, an RBI single by the opposing pitcher in the fifth inning. George James lasted eight innings, but was already pinch-hit for in favor of an Omar Millan strikeout when Tim Stalker's double in the bottom 8th brought at least the TYING run back to the plate… but that was still going to be Sanchez. The Raccoons went against every grain and sent Harenberg to pinch-hit, netting them a sorry pop to short. Jaden Booker walked in a full count, pulling up Hereford with the innocent wish for some 2-out heroics, but Cesar Castro intercepted his bouncer near the third base sack and the Raccoons lost, weakly and meekly. 2-0 Indians. Stalker 2-4; James 8.0 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 7 K, L (2-3);

Meanwhile Jarod Spencer went off to the DL with a sprained wrist, just when he had raised his batting average over .300, because how could anything ever be the other way round for the Raccoons? No cold player ever got hurt… ever. The Druid estimated him to be out for a month.

By then, Ramos would be back, but that still left a black hole of about two weeks that somehow had to be bridged. And Sanchez? Batting .143… the Raccoons would take a flyer on a lottery ticket instead, promoting 22-year-old switch-hitter 2B Sam Cass from AAA, where he was batting .293 in 21 games after starting the season in Ham Lake. Cass had been the ninth-rounder in the 2024 draft, so making it onto the 40-man roster was already a success for the kid.

Game 2
IND: SS Pizano – LF M. Cowan – 1B Jon Gonzalez – CF Suhay – C Kennett – 3B Blades – RF Plunkett – 2B Boggs – P Bressner
POR: SS Stalker – CF Mora – 3B Hereford – 1B Harenberg – LF Gomez – C Tovias – RF Booker – 2B Cass – P Gutierrez

Rico and a wholly right-handed lineup went about as well as you'd expect, resulting in a leadoff walk to Mario Pizano and an RBI triple hit by Mike Cowan right at the start of the game, and Cowan was brought in as well before long. When Stalker and Mora opened the Coons' end of the first with singles, Hereford killed the effort with a double play, even though Harenberg hit a 2-out RBI single to stay close this time. Rafael Gomez struck out, but the Critters would get another chance in the bottom 3rd that began with a dying bloop for a leadoff single jabbed off Gutierrez' bat, then a 4-pitch walk rendered to Tim Stalker. Mora popped out, Hereford grounded out, but *Harenberg* came through again with a flyball past Ben Suhay in center for a 2-out, 2-run, score-flipping double. And then Gomez made the final out again in a 3-2 contest.

While the Indians made some meaty contact in those middle innings, they tended to make it right at a defender and didn't get much of a threat together against Gutierrez, who in turn started the bottom 5th with another single, then reached third on Tim Stalker's double to right, and all of that with nobody out. Mora struck out (…!), Hereford hit a sac fly to left, the Indians wanted no piece of a Harenberg on 3 RBI, and – oh look – Gomez made the third out for the third time, this time grounding out somberly to Andy Bressner himself, keeping the score at 4-2. The Indians were not defeated yet, however, and ran Gutierrez from the game in the seventh inning on doubles by Elliott Kennett and Mike Plunkett, the latter with two outs, pulling the score closer to 4-3. The Raccoons walked PH Zachary Ryder intentionally, but that also saw Bressner removed for ex-Coon Matt Jamieson. Ricky Ohl entered in a double switch that also brought on German Sanchez for Sam Cass and his 0-for-3 major league debut, and struck out Jamieson to preserve the lead, narrowly, at stretch time, after which Tim Stalker homered off Mo Robinson to give the Critters an insurance run again. Mora got nailed, and after Hereford grounded out Harenberg was extended another intentional walk, allowing Gomez to make the last out for the fourth time in this game.

The Indians turned Ricky Ohl inside out in the eighth… or did he turn himself inside out? Leadoff single by Mario Pizano, then right away two walks loaded the bases with nobody out. Suhay, an abomination of a cleanup hitter with strikeouts and nothing but strikeouts, struck out, as did Kennett, before Brett Blades laid off the garbage and drew four balls in a row to force home a run. The Raccoons sent Kevin Surginer to face Plunkett – and that strikeout ended the inning, but didn't solve the mystery of the deflating pen at all. Josh Boles began the ninth with no cushion and a K to Matt Dear, but then conceded a single to Alex Aleman and before long walked the bags full with two outs, bringing up Suhay. The King of K kould not resist and struck out once more, letting the giggling Critters escape into the night with a gut-twisting victory. 5-4 Blighters. Stalker 3-3, BB, HR, RBI; Harenberg 2-3, 2 BB, 2B, 3 RBI;

Some numbers about runners left on base in this game, which was such a great advertisement for the sport as a whole. Ben Suhay was 0-for-5 and whiffed three times (in addition to 3 K on Monday), and left six aboard, while the Indians individually totaled 20 LOB (eight as a team). The Coons had 16 individual LOB – ALL of them in the top 5 of the order. To be precise, they all belonged to Mora (4), Hereford (6), and Gomez (6).

Game 3
IND: SS Pizano – C Dear – 1B Jon Gonzalez – CF Suhay – LF Plunkett – RF Ryder – 3B C. Castro – 2B Boggs – P Saccoccio
POR: SS Stalker – CF Mora – 2B Hereford – 1B Harenberg – RF Gomez – C Tovias – LF Millan – 3B Booker – P Delgadillo

The home crowd clapped politely if half-heartedly when Jon Gonzalez hit a first-inning dinger to put the Indians 1-0 ahead against the hideously unspooled Dan Delgadillo who kept pushing that ERA of SIX. And he was not only horrible at the start of the game, not getting strikes over, not getting strikes past batters, and not getting batters to not hit rockets to the depths of the ballpark. He started a-suck, then ran with it. Calling him garbage would have been an insult to garbage. The Indians strafed him for eight hits in the first four innings, and were held to three runs largely because they hit into a double play and Elias Tovias threw out not one but TWO base stealers. To make everything that much worse, the Coons' only base hit the first time through the order had been … by Delgadillo. The top 5th saw singles by Pizano and Gonzalez, then a 2-out, 2-run double by ****ing Ben Suhay, who was suddenly on a 3-hit day against a turd of a pitcher. Billy Brotman replaced the graceless Delgadillo and got a groundout from Plunkett to end the inning, with Portland down 5-0 and thoroughly and completely beaten.

The dismal Raccoons position players did not manage to land a single base hit until a 2-out single in the bottom 7th chipped by Rafael Gomez. Saccoccio had been silently dominant, whiffing five, until then, but now also served up a 2-run homer to Tovias. That was not all; after going 0-for-2 to start the inning, the Coons would unwrap a cycle with two down as Millan doubled and Booker tripled, but then Magallanes struck out in the #9 hole after having entered in a double switch along with Brotman. Bottom 8th, Armando Leal hit a pinch-hit single for Jonathan Fleischer in the #2 spot, but when Hereford and Harenberg both hit deep flies, they were not nearly deep enough, and both were caught by Ryder and Jamieson, respectively. Indy's Myles Mood then retired the Coons in order in the ninth. 5-3 Indians. Leal (PH) 1-1; Fleischer 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 3 K;

The Raccoons also sent German Sanchez (.133) back to AAA while activating Kyle Anderson at the end of his rehab stint, during which he had pitched for a 4.20 ERA in six starts. Walks were up, strikeouts were down, and my mood was salty. He had last pitched on Tuesday and could not get into a game right away, though.

Oh, the best news – Nick Valdes hit the joint on Thursday morning in due time to voice lots of displeasure about recent performance and also to take in the fourth and final game in the set.

There were more roster moves that had been done even without the nagging. Juan Magallanes (.167) got the boot to AAA … as did Dan Delgadillo (2-3, 6.23 ERA). The Raccoons called up SS/3B Butch Gerster (.230, 0 HR, 6 RBI in AAA) and OF/1B Ryan Allan (.323, 1 HR, 7 RBI). Prospects listed here: zero. Gerster was 27 and one year older only than Allan, the fourth-round selection in the 2022 draft, that had milled around in Ham Lake as recently as the previous summer.

Game 4
IND: SS Pizano – RF Ryder – 1B Jon Gonzalez – CF Suhay – C Kennett – 3B Blades – LF Aleman – 2B Boggs – P McInerney
POR: 2B Hereford – CF Mora – LF Morales – 1B Harenberg – RF Gomez – C Tovias – 3B Booker – SS Gerster – P Roberts

Butch Gerster didn't make himself immediately useful or even likeable, grounding out his first time up on the year before throwing away a leadoff grounder by Jon Gonzalez in the fourth, putting the go-ahead run in scoring position. Somehow, Roberts eloped on a K to Suhay, a pop, and a grounder to Hereford, who along with Morales had knocked a pair of singles in the bottom 1st, but Harenberg had been rung up and Gomez had flown out gingerly. Roberts threatened to make his mess himself in the fifth, knocking Alex Aleman, who was caught stealing before Robby Boggs doubled. McInerney was told to swing with one down and struck out, allowing Roberts to exit rather comfortably from what could have been a mess. In turn, Roberts drove in the game's first run in the bottom 5th, a sharp 2-out single to right-center that brought in Jaden Booker from second base…

Roberts kept being dangled over the ledge by his team, but held the Indians to three base hits through seven innings, and maybe Rafael Gomez' leadoff double to right in the bottom 7th could at least allow the Coons to eek out an insurance run. Indeed it did, even though Tovias flew out to shallow right afterwards. Jaden Booker's spanked grounder was not contained by Brett Blades at third base and eluded up the line for an RBI double before the bottom of the order was suffocated by McInerney to keep it a 2-0 score. Roberts completed eight on 85 pitches and while it was "only" a 2-run lead, he remained in the game to face the Indians in the ninth, starting with Zachary Ryder, especially in light of the royal mess the crunching bullpen had made on Tuesday. Even Ryder's leadoff single could not scare the Raccoons into their relievers. Roberts struck out Gonzalez, struck out Suhay, then got Kennett to fly out to Mora in center, finishing the ordeal on 101 pitches. 2-0 Critters! Booker 2-3, 2B, RBI; Roberts 9.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 9 K, W (4-3) and 1-3, RBI;

For Roberts this was his fifth career shutout, four of them with the Raccoons.

Not gonna lie, the shutout also helped gloss over the glaring holes in the lineup a bit and Valdes left without revoking my rights to use the employee canteen.

Raccoons (22-17) vs. Thunder (21-20) – May 19-21, 2028

The Thunder were just at the .500 mark which would have been good enough to win the South in the previous campaign, but now had them sit 2 1/2 games out of first place. They ranked fifth in runs scored and second from the bottom in runs allowed, so maybe seeing some softer pitching might help the Critters rejuvenate at the plate. Their rotation was 10th by ERA, and their pen was the worst outright. We had won eight of nine games against them in 2027.

Projected matchups:
Rin Nomura (3-3, 3.10 ERA) vs. Jose Vazquez (1-4, 5.63 ERA)
George James (2-3, 4.68 ERA) vs. Andy Palomares (2-5, 5.83 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (3-0, 1.87 ERA) vs. Jeff Dykstra (3-4, 3.34 ERA)

Sunday could also bring Max Nelson (3-2, 6.21 ERA) – both him and Dykstra had been involved in a double header on Wednesday, and nobody was going to be rested fully in all likelihood. In any case, all the options on the table were right-handed. Their sole southpaw in the rotation, "Graveyard" Gill (3-3, 2.44 ERA), had pitched on Thursday.

Game 1
OCT: 3B L. Rivera – C Burgess – RF Sagredo – SS Serrato – 1B J. Elliott – CF Pavel – LF Otero – 2B McWhorter – P J. Vazquez
POR: SS Stalker – CF Mora – 3B Hereford – 1B Harenberg – C Tovias – LF Millan – RF Allan – 2B Cass – P Nomura

Nomura conceded an early run on 2-out walks to Luis Sagredo and Alex Serrato, then John Elliott's clean single to left, but at least chipped in to flip the score in the bottom 2nd. Omar Millan had reached base with a 1-out walk, and after Ryan Allan flew out in his first major league at-bat, Sam Cass came through for his maiden base hit, an RBI double up the rightfield line that tied the game. He got his first run scored as well in the inning, scoring when Nomura's looper dropped into centerfield. Portland would up the score to 3-1 in the following inning, though in unearned fashion. A bad throwing error by veteran Tom McWhorter had put Harenberg on second base, from where he scored on Omar Millan's 2-out double, something Luis Sagredo matched in the top 5th, hitting a 2-out RBI double over Allan to score Jose Vazquez, who had opened that inning with a single off Nomura. Ah, some things just never changed…

The Raccoons also couldn't get the bats up in the middle innings at all, landing no base hits from the fourth through the sixth. Much the contrary, the middle of the order struck out as a whole in the fifth inning… Nomura was also done after 98 pitches and seven frames, handing the 3-2 lead to Ricky Ohl, who retired Serrato, John Elliott, and John Pavel in the eighth without much panic. Bottom 8th, Millan led off with a single, then was caught stealing on a run-and-hit call where Ryan Allan missed badly before legging out an infield single for his first major league hit on the very next pitch. Oklahoma reliever held the ball, but couldn't do anything with it before lustlessly tossing it into the Coons' dugout. A wild pitch advanced the runner, but Danny Morales popped out in place of Sam Cass. Rafael Gomez then batted for Ohl with two down and managed to bring in the insurance run with a fly to left that bounced just outside of Leo Otero's range, two feet inside the line, for an RBI double. Stalker flew out, leaving a 2-run lead to Josh Boles, who sawed off the bottom of the order in 11 pitches. 4-2 Coons. Millan 2-3, BB, 2B, RBI; Gomez (PH) 1-1, 2B, RBI; Nomura 7.0 IP, 7 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 5 K, W (4-3) and 1-3, RBI;

Game 2
OCT: 3B L. Rivera – RF Sagredo – LF de Santiago – SS Serrato – C Burgess – 2B Kane – 1B LeMoine – CF Otero – P Palomares
POR: SS Stalker – CF Mora – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – C Leal – LF Millan – 3B Booker – 2B Cass – P James

George James had just outlasted Dan Delgadillo, then kept teasing his GM with a second inning right from the gutters. Mike Burgess singles, Mike Kane homered, which was bad enough, but James also walked Chris LeMoine and Leo Otero with nobody out, and then Sagredo to load them up for Carlos de Santiago, who was a former Logger knew choking and popped out to Sam Cass to strand a full set and prevented George James from going over 45 pitches in two innings. But wouldn't you worry about the Thunder, who had another 2-spot up their sleeves in the very next inning. Burgess hit a double this time, scored on Mike Kane's single, with Gomez' throw home allowing Kane to move to second, then to third on LeMoine's single. When Cass couldn't complete the double play on Otero's grounder to short, Kane scored an extra run, then burying the Coons 4-1. They had amounted to a run on back-to-back doubles by Leal and Millan in the meantime, but of course the rancid bottom of the order had left Millan on second base where he arrived with nobody out. The rancid bottom of the order also ****ed up Harenberg and Leal hitting a pair of leadoff singles in the bottom 4th.

The Raccoons shyly poked their noses from the ditch, whiskers twitching, to smell the air in the sixth inning. Rafael Gomez hit a leadoff jack, but then stranded the tying run in the seventh inning, popping out woefully after Tim Stalker had driven in Jaden Booker in the inning to get all the way back to 4-3. James remained on a hook that got longer again in the eighth thanks to Billy Brotman haplessly walking Mike Kane on base, and Kevin Surginer giving up the 2-out pinch-hit single to .138 menace Erik Janes, two more runs scoring solely on Surginer's ledger in the ninth, in which he retired none of the first four batters. A depressed home crowd and an even more depressed GM saw him allow singles to Sagredo and de Santiago, nailing Serrato, then failing to throw any sort of strike to Burgess. Kane hit a sac fly to establish slam range when the ****ing Raccoons couldn't even come back from a 1-run deficit. They could sure tease, though. Facing ex-Coon Jonathan Snyder in the bottom 9th and down 7-3, pinch-hitters opened the inning with base hits. Tovias singled to right. Morales doubled to left. The top of the order came up! Stalker struck out before Abel Mora homered to right-center. The fans burst into cheers and cried rally, when I could read the scoreboard and knew that no comeback was possible. The Thunder sent Arturo Arellano, another righty, to restore order. Both Gomez and Harenberg flew out to John Pavel to end the game. 7-6 Thunder. Mora 2-4, BB, HR, 3 RBI; Leal 2-4, 2B; Tovias (PH) 1-1; Morales (PH) 1-1, 2B;

Tovias in a slump. Harenberg in a slump. Gomez in a slump. Hereford in a slump. The bullpen in a slump. Everybody else on the DL.

Does no baseball god have mercy anymore??

Game 3
OCT: CF Otero – 3B Janes – SS Serrato – 1B J. Elliott – LF Hodgers – C Riley – RF LeMoine – 2B Kane – P Nelson
POR: 2B Stalker – CF Mora – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – 3B Hereford – C Tovias – LF Allan – SS Gerster – P Gutierrez

Rich Hereford hit a single in the second, but when Tovias flew out to center for the second out in the inning I sighed and regretted getting up in the morning to begin with. Then the bottom of the order proved me wrong. Allan, Gerster, AND Rico ALL hit 2-out singles, with the latter two each driving in a run to give the home team a 2-0 lead on getaway day. And they unleashed another bushel of runners in the next inning, with Tovias and Allan driving in 2-out RBI singles to jump out to a 4-0 edge in support of Rico Gutierrez, who had retired the Thunder in order the first time through the Thunder lineup. Perfection lasted for 14 outs in the game before Liam Riley squeezed out a walk in a full count in the fifth, although LeMoine soon flew out to Gomez to end the inning anyway. The no-hitter went away on the next batter Gutierrez faced, with Tim Stalker's arms not being long enough to contain Mike Kane's low liner to lead off the top of the sixth, yielding a single to begin the inning. Max Nelson was weirdly enough told to swing away and hit into a double play to Hereford and Rico got out of the inning that way. The Coons added a run in the sixth, Mora singling home Gerster, and with a 5-run edge it was really all about whether Rico could possibly get back in the SHO column. The Thunder didn't touch him in the seventh, but his pitch count got up to 90 by the time John Elliott grounded out to Hereford. Victor Hodgers and Liam Riley made outs to begin the eighth inning, but then Chris LeMoine robbed Rico of even the shutout, knelling a solo homer on his 106th pitch of the day. He threw two more, allowing a single to Kane, then was replaced by McLin to face the pinch-hitting McWhorter, who struck out. Kearney would then finish the game with a scoreless ninth, netting the Coons the series and a winning week. 5-1 Raccoons. Hereford 2-3, BB; Allan 3-4, RBI; Gerster 1-2, BB, RBI; Gutierrez 7.2 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 2 K, W (4-0) and 1-2, RBI;

In other news

May 15 – The Blue Sox end PIT 1B Danny Santillano's (.421, 5 HR, 22 RBI) hitting streak at 21 games, holding him dry despite getting routed by the Miners in a 10-2 final score.
May 15 – DEN SP Jose Menendez (3-3, 3.92 ERA) could be out for the year with a torn back muscle.
May 17 – TOP SS/2B Alex Majano (.324, 0 HR, 16 RBI) would miss three to four weeks with a strained calf muscle.
May 18 – VAN OF/1B Norman Day (.357, 0 HR, 17 RBI) has chained together a 20-game hitting streak with a sixth-inning single in an 8-7 win over the Loggers.
May 19 – CHA C Matt Cooper (.278, 4 HR, 14 RBI) could miss most of the remaining season with a torn abdominal muscle.
May 19 – The Titans trade C Giovanni James (.306, 2 HR, 26 RBI) to the Buffaloes in exchange for a minor league outfielder and a prospect.
May 20 – Indy SP David Elliott (2-3, 4.13 ERA) 2-hits the Bayhawks in a 2-0 shutout.
May 20 – A sprained wrist might cost BOS INF Adam Corder (.234, 0 HR, 11 RBI) up to a month on the DL.
May 21 – The 22-game hitting streak of VAN OF/1B Norman Day (.343, 0 HR, 19 RBI) ends with a dry appearance in the Canadiens' 7-6 loss to the Aces.

Complaints and stuff

On the weekend the Cyclones signed Cookie Carmona to a minor league contract. That is how far he has tumbled down the stairs in baseball… Even Cristiano urged him to retire instead of making a folly of himself around juicy 21-year-olds in the minor leagues.

We are tied for sixth in runs scored, says BNN and the ABL, and even the damn Agitator, but I somehow can't really believe it. Last week there was actual life in the lineup. This week Jarod Spencer lasted one at-bat and then the floodgates for "organizational depth" players opened. Hoping really hard we can get Alberto Ramos back in due time… Rich Hereford has finally been swallowed by a black hole, too, landing only a single RBI this week while batting 4-for-22. Only three strikeouts, so the BABIP was not great, but… I have already checked in with Valdes, and BABIP is also not an excuse.

So toss BABIP on the pile along with injuries and ancient gypsy curses for things I am not supposed to use as an excuse anymore.

I just can't have any fun anymore around here, can I??

We are now off for a 2-week road trip, zig-zagging east from here to, ultimately Boston, stopping in Tijuana, Vegas, and Atlanta on the way.

Fun Fact: Chris LeMoine's shutout-breaking eighth-inning home run off Rico Gutierrez was his 200th career home run.

Chris LeMoine and Victor Hodgers were team mates on the Loggers from 2015 through 2019 when both them and the Loggers were striking fear in our hearts.

Since then, Hodgers, a career .277 batter with 90 homers, has tingled through six different towns to land in Oklahoma, batting .212 in his age 37 season. LeMoine, a .255 batter in the majors across 14 seasons, is just scarcely outhitting him, batting .234 with two homers at age 35.

And, well, Cookie is now in Glenville. Wherever the **** that is. The last blossoms of the 2010s, withering away and dying. I am serious about that.

This week we learned that Jonny Toner, the 4-time Pitcher of the Year, retired from baseball after he could not secure another contract.

Crumbling ruins
Consigned to decay
By indifferent winds of time
Bit by bit carried away