[jg2977]

DON CHERRY’S COACH’S CORNER: RANGERS DROP THE HAMMER WITH 5 STRAIGHT HOMERS!

Now listen up, folks — I don’t care if it’s September or the middle of a blizzard in Moose Jaw — what we saw at Madison Square Garden today? That wasn’t baseball. That was a full-on barnburner by a bunch o’ boys who came to play, take names, and launch missiles!

FIVE HOME RUNS — IN A ROW — IN ONE INNING! You kiddin’ me?! That’s tougher than takin’ a slapshot from Al MacInnis without a cup!

Look, I’ve seen a lotta things in my day — I coached Orr, I coached Macoun, I coached a guy who once fought his own reflection in the penalty box — but what the Rangers did in that fourth inning? That was old-time hockey... if hockey was played with bats the size of telephone poles!

Let’s run it down like a good ol’ Rock’em Sock’em tape:

Avery Grubin starts it off — boom! Three-run shot. That’s a beauty, kid. Got the name of a guy who’d elbow you in the teeth and then ask politely for a glass of milk.
Then you got Barton Sattler, steps in — kaboom! Solo shot! I think the Lightning were still looking for the ball in the upper deck.
Next? Kramer! That kid — hey, he can fly, eh? Bang — gone. That’s three!
Here comes Mark Grubin — no relation? Who cares! Whack! That ball was sent to Scarborough, folks!
And if you thought it was over — uh uh — Will Cuylle steps in and just destroys one. Like a truck through a Timmy’s drive-thru. Five dingers, back-to-back-to-back-to-back-to-back!
That’s not an inning — that’s a war crime against pitching!

And listen, Tampa Bay — I love you guys, I really do — but your bullpen looked like it was auditioning for a circus. Vollmer, Shimura, Gerg — they all got lit up like the Griswold house at Christmas.

Final score? 19–1. That ain’t just a win — that’s a message. A loud one.

Seong Gi-Hun? Fifteen strikeouts! That’s Don Drysdale stuff, baby! The kid was throwin’ smoke like a forest fire in Thunder Bay!

And one more thing — to the kid in the stands with the sign saying “Rangers (probably) 2002 Stanley Cup Finals Champions”? I love the confidence — but remember, it’s only Game 1. Don’t start measuring the ring finger just yet.

Bottom line? You come into New York, you better bring more than your glove and a hope. This Rangers club? They’re tougher than a two-dollar steak and hotter than July in Sudbury.

This is Don Cherry — keep your stick on the ice, and your bat on the barrel!

Now let’s go get some meatballs, eh?