[Westheim]

Raccoons (24-26) vs. Aces (18-31) – May 29-31, 2056

The Critters returned home to see what they could do against the Aces, whom they had beaten two out of three in the first series this year between these teams, and that was about the pace the Aces were going at with their .367 winning percentage, which somehow was good enough (“good”) for fifth place in the South. They had the seventh-best offense in the CL, but the pitching just kept on giving out gifts and they had the most runs surrendered in the league, with a -57 run differential. The rotation and bullpen both had ERA’s over five. Jeremy Welter, regular infielder, was on the DL along with two pitchers that weren’t any help anyway.

Projected matchups:
Seisaku Taki (4-6, 4.16 ERA) vs. Josh Wilson (4-3, 4.29 ERA)
Sean Sweeton (4-2, 3.00 ERA) vs. Ray Benner (0-1, 0.00 ERA)
Craig Kniep (2-2, 3.27 ERA) vs. Scott Evans (3-2, 3.58 ERA)

Only right-handers coming up here; Benner and Evans were both rookies and would make their second and tenth ABL starts, respectively. Benner had lost his first outing without giving up an earned run, but three unearned runs thanks to as many errors behind him in a 3-2 loss against the damn Elks. No, the Aces’ defense wasn’t any good either.

Game 1
LVA: CF Hummel – 2B J. White – 1B Austin – 3B A. Alfaro – LF Kaniewski – RF Epperson – SS Veguilla – C Lytle – P Jo. Wilson
POR: CF Royer – SS Lavorano – LF Kirkwoord – 2B Waters – RF Puckeridge – 1B Ramsay – C Fiore – 3B Venegas – P Taki

Three scoreless innings to begin the week brought Taki’s ERA into the threes for the first time since the start of the month, but was still slightly outdone by Josh Wilson, who gave up one hit through three innings to Taki’s two. Alex Alfaro’s leadoff homer in the fourth made the prior point moot as well, but maybe the Coons could stir something up in the bottom 4th. Lonzo started with an infield single, stole second base, and Kirkwood then walked onto the open base. Matt Waters was offered a fat one, belted it for a 3-run blast to right, and the Raccoons took the lead. Two singles sandwiching a walk then loaded the bases with the Critters’ 5-6-7 batters, but just like that the 8-9-1 made shambolic outs to not score any more runs; Venegas popped out, Taki struck out, and Royer flew out to John Kaniewski in left. Jim White tripled and scored on Aubrey Austin’s groundout to reduce the lead to 3-2 in the fifth, but Kirkwood answered with a solo home run to left right away. Taki would pitch around Miguel Veguilla’s double in the sixth, but then grounded out poorly to – along with Royer – waste Anton Venegas’ 1-out triple in the bottom of the inning. Taki would go seven innings, and then Lane and Walters did the rest without allowing another base runner. 4-2 Raccoons. Kirkwood 1-2, 2 BB, HR, RBI; Ramsay 2-4; Taki 7.0 IP, 9 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 7 K, W (5-6);

Taki ended the game with a 4.00 ERA, but that was rounded down from something like 4.004; he would have needed one more out to get back into the threes, but at least he appeared on the right path now.

Game 2
LVA: CF Hummel – 2B J. White – 1B Austin – 3B A. Alfaro – LF Kaniewski – RF Epperson – SS Veguilla – C W. Ramos – P Benner
POR: CF Royer – SS Lavorano – RF Puckeridge – 2B Waters – LF Caballero – 1B Ramsay – C Fiore – 3B Chavez – P Sweeton

The fourth run Ray Benner allowed as a major leaguer was just as unearned as the first three, but this time on his own throwing error on a comebacker hit by Oscar Caballero in the bottom 2nd. Benner aimed for Waters starting from first base, but threw wide of second base, which added a second runner. Ramsay hit into a double play, but Matt Fiore came through with an RBI single to right; this tied the game, erasing the Aces’ 1-0 lead from the top 1st when Kaniewski had singled home Ken Hummel with two outs.

Sweeton was out of sorts; he walked Jim White in the first, then two more in the third inning, and yet two more in the fourth inning. Those last two were the ones that came around to bite and score. Gunner Epperson and Veguilla drew the walks to begin the top 4th, and an RBI single by Willie Ramos and Hummel’s sac fly got the runs home for a 3-1 Aces lead. Sweeton would hang around for two scoreless innings while bunting into a double play, then gave up a leadoff double to Benner and a 2-run homer to Hummel in the seventh and was yanked for the weirdly-hanging-on Kyle Brobeck.

The Critters never managed to hang an earned run on Benner, who went seven, with another double play tumbled into by Fiore, and both Royer and Caballero were caught stealing. Brobeck threw three scoreless garbage innings despite getting hit around for five base knocks by the Aces, while Aaron Erwin pitched two scoreless innings for the Aces in the eighth and ninth. 5-1 Aces. Chavez 2-3; Brobeck 3.0 IP, 5 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

Game 3
LVA: SS Veguilla – 2B J. White – CF Hummel – 1B Austin – LF Kaniewski – 3B A. Alfaro – RF Epperson – C Lytle – P S. Evans
POR: CF Royer – SS Lavorano – LF Kirkwood – 2B Waters – RF Caballero – 1B Ramsay – 3B Venegas – C Stanton – P Kniep

Walk to White, double by Hummel, outta here by Austin, and just like that, Craig Kniep trailed 3-0 in the first inning. Top 2nd, Epperson walked, Jarred Lytle singled, and then Veguilla rammed a 3-run homer. Since the game was an L anyway at this point – give or take a 2-run homer by Ramsay in the bottom 2nd – the Raccoons tried to get a few more innings out of the rookie, but gave up after Evans and White hit singles and were on the corners with two outs in the fourth inning. Tanizaki came in and got a groundout to short from Hummel to close Kniep’s needlessly ghastly line at six runs in three and two thirds innings…

Because we can’t have nice things anymore.

Speaking of which, Tanizaki was torn a wholly new ******* in the fifth inning. He walked Austin on nine pitches. Kaniewski homered, 8-2. Alfaro whiffed, but Epperson singled, Little trypled, and Evans (…) hit another single, 10-2. I was still waiting for the advertised terrible Aces pitching to show up, but instead we got Ryan Harmer for two innings, giving up three hits and two walks, and somehow no runs, but surely enough another ******* single to ******* Scott Evans. Kirkwood hit a solo jack in the bottom 8th off Evans that only got the statheads excited, while Eloy Sencion didn’t find it beneath himself to walk Evans in the ninth inning. Pucks countered with a pinch-hit home run off Evans in the bottom 9th, which meant the tying run moved from the dumpster behind the ballpark to the water cooler at the other end of the clubhouse tunnel. Matt Fiore made it back-to-backs, which at least got Evans removed from the game, but the rally didn’t go on and Stanton and Solorzano made the last few outs quickly. 10-5 Aces. Waters 2-4; Puckeridge (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI; Fiore (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI; Solorzano (PH) 1-3;

(frowns)

Raccoons (25-28) vs. Crusaders (23-28) – June 2-4, 2056

Here was another team with a worse record, and another potential buzzsaw to run into. The Crusaders had the second-most runs in the CL, and ranked seventh in runs allowed, with made for a +18 run differential, and yet they were five under .500 – they were due a winning streak. Well, they did have issues, like a 5.38 ERA on the pen, but offensively they looked like a force that just had to get more steady. New York was up 3-2 in the season series.

Projected matchups:
Julian Dunn (3-2, 3.72 ERA) vs. Ben Seiter (5-2, 2.90 ERA)
He Shui (4-4, 4.72 ERA) vs. Kyle Turay (3-3, 4.22 ERA)
Seisaku Taki (5-6, 4.00 ERA) vs. Jose Ortega (4-3, 3.79 ERA)

No southpaw starters – the Crusaders didn’t have any. Also no Mike Pfeifer and Chad Williams – the two outfielders were on the DL.

Game 1
NYC: 2B O. Sanchez – SS Z. Suggs – 1B Sevilla – RF Buss – LF M. Villa – 3B Gates – C J. Ortiz – CF Mata – P Seiter
POR: CF Royer – SS Lavorano – LF Kirkwood – 2B Waters – 1B Puckeridge – RF Caballero – 3B Brobeck – C Fiore – P Dunn

Dunn, the dolt, nicked Omar Sanchez to begin the game, and Sanchez promptly stole his 28th base of the season, increasing his lead over Lonzo to nine, which somehow annoyed my more than the back-to-back RBI doubles yanked into either gap by Zach Suggs and Raul Sevilla. Dunn then quelled the offense and would not allow a run through five innings anymore. He also got the Raccoons’ first hit with a third-inning single, and one of only two through five innings for the home team… And then, after a Sevilla fly out to begin the sixth inning, he also got relentlessly pummeled out of the game with a Jeff Buss triple, Mario Villa’s RBI single, Prince Gates’ RBI double, and Jose Ortiz’ RBI double. Carlos Mata then clonked another RBI double off Ryan Harmer, 6-0.

The Coons made the board in ho-hum fashion in the bottom 6th when Steve Royer hit a leadoff single mid-slump, stole second base, and reached third when Jose Ortiz’ throw got away from Suggs. That allowed Lonzo to plate him with a sac fly to Buss. Kirkwood singled with one out, and Pucks fired a homer to left with two outs, reducing the deficit by half. Seiter further got taken deep by Brobeck to begin the bottom 7th, 6-4. Royer hit a double with two outs, but was stranded when Lonzo’s grounder was snared by Gates and hurled to first base just in time to end the inning. Tanizaki and Lillis kept the Crusaders within reach, but the Coons went in order in the bottom 8th, then drew mightily struggling (7.61 ERA) closer Ben Lussier in the ninth. Caballero, Brobeck, and Chavez went in order. 6-4 Crusaders. Royer 2-4, 2B;

Maud? – How long until the season is over? – Soooo loooong…?

(whiskers hang)

Game 2
NYC: 2B O. Sanchez – SS Z. Suggs – 1B Sevilla – RF Buss – LF M. Villa – 3B Gates – C Seidman – CF Mata – P Turay
POR: CF Royer – SS Lavorano – LF Kirkwood – 2B Waters – RF Puckeridge – 1B Ramsay – C Fiore – 3B Venegas – P Shui

New York had no hits the first time through, but Shui walked a pair and seemed generally out of sorts still. The Raccoons had Royer on and stealing a base in the first, but stranded him between the 2-3-4 batters, then had Pucks on with a leadoff single in the second inning. Rams walked to move him to second base and Pucks then stole third base before he scored on Fiore’s groundout for the game’s first run. Rams moved up to third base on the play, then went home when Venegas flew out to Jeff Buss, but was struck down at the plate by lightning and the inning ended in 9-2 fashion. Royer hit another single in the third, but was forced out by Lonzo, who was then caught stealing as he spiralled deeper into a slump that had lingered for all of May and was now fully breaking out.

Bottom 4th, singles by Waters and Pucks, then a nicker into Rams, and the bases were loaded with one down. Fiore grounded to Omar Sanchez, and only the second-sacker’s slight fumble prevented the double play; the Crusaders still got Rams at second base, but a run scored. Venegas then grounded out to Suggs, leaving runners on the corners. Shui still had to allow a base hit, and did so with a single that Mike Seidman ticked into center in the fifth inning. The Crusaders quickly escalated with doubles by Mata and Sanchez, tying the score at two before Suggs grounded out to Lonzo to end the inning. For what it was worth, Shui also hit a double down the leftfield line to begin the bottom 5th and was then driven home by Royer’s double that split Villa and Mata, scoring himself for a new 3-2 lead. The 2-3-4 failed again, though, and Royer was stranded at third base.

Top 6th, Sevilla opened with a single to center, but was out at second base on Jeff Buss’ grounder to short, but broke up the double play… and from the looks of it also Matt Waters, who had his legs taken out from under him on an I-don’t-give-a-**** slide and then writhed in agony on the dirt before being collected on a stretcher. That slide might yet get Omar Sanchez beaned before the end of the weekend, but for the moment the Raccoons sent Chavez to fill up the numbers on the infield. Shui’s day ended in the bottom 6th when the Raccoons brought up the #9 spot with two outs and Rams and Fiore in scoring position. They had reached… uh… on a Buss error, a wild pitch, and an intentional walk. Caballero pinch-hit and bashed an RBI single through the right side, 4-2, then took off for second base, and Seidman’s throw wasn’t anywhere near second base. The error scored Fiore and moved Caballero to third base, Royer doubled him home, and then even Lonzo briefly stopped drowning with a 2-out RBI single to center, then stole second base, but was left on as Ken Quisenberry stopped the bleeding in the 7-2 game.

7-2 became 7-6 around Eloy Sencion’s rather horrendous seventh inning. Mata singled. Nate Culp walked. Sanchez walked. It kinds pinballed out of control from there. Mario Villa tripled home the fourth run of the inning eventually and Sencion off the mound along with it, and Gates flew out to Caballero in pretty deep left against Lane, finally ending the ******* inning. The Raccoons faced righty Alex Mancilla in the bottom 7th. Pucks walked, Fiore walked, and Solorzano batted for a hitless Venegas. He swung at a fat 3-1, and belted it 429 feet for his first homer of the year, 10-6. Caballero then went back-to-back with a homer to right off Mike Vance – it was the third straight half-inning with four runs scored in it, but that was also the last half-inning with scoring in the game. Lane pitched the eighth (after even batting to end the bottom 7th), and Tanizaki at first put a pair on base in the ninth inning, but before we could bother Matt Walters got a double play grounder from Buss and was on his way out to finish the game. 11-6 Critters. Royer 4-5, 2 2B, 2 RBI; Lavorano 2-5, RBI; Puckeridge 2-4, BB; Ramsay 2-4; Stanton (PH) 1-1; Solorzano (PH) 1-2, HR, 3 RBI; Caballero (PH) 2-2, HR, 2 RBI;

No news on Waters, who as an old man needed to have all sorts of scans and tests taken after a nasty fall, so the Raccoons played four paws short on Sunday. Lonzo had landed two hits on Saturday, but was still deep in a slump and got a day off as we ran out the backup infielders in tandem.

Game 3
NYC: 2B O. Sanchez – SS Z. Suggs – 1B Sevilla – RF Buss – LF M. Villa – 3B Gates – C Seidman – CF Mata – P J. Ortega
POR: CF Royer – 3B Venegas – LF Kirkwood – RF Puckeridge – 1B Ramsay – C Fiore – 2B Chavez – SS Espinoza – P Taki

Royer walked and was caught stealing to begin the Raccoons’ day in the box, which helped both pitchers to face the minimum through three innings, except that Taki was still perfect with five strikeouts. That changed with a walk to Sanchez (of all people) in the fourth inning, although Suggs quickly forced out the speedster, and a K to Sevilla and Buss’ groundout kept New York off the board. Royer sneaking a single to center on a 1-2 pitch to lead off the bottom 4th marked the first base hit for anybody in the game. He was stranded at first base. Prince Gates got a single for New York in the fifth, but was also stranded on base.

Bottom 5th, Ortega lost both Fiore and Espinoza on balls, bringing up Taki with two outs. A scratch single loaded the bases for Royer, who grounded meekly to Sevilla to end the inning with three Coons left stranded… Taki remained awesome, with eight strikeouts through six shutout innings, but he was more or less the only one so far. That changed in the bottom 6th, although the team made two outs before kicking it into gear, finally. Pucks singled, then scored on a Rams double into the right corner for a 1-0 lead. Fiore walked intentionally, Chavez hit an RBI single, and Espinoza’s grounder to Gates was overran for an error, allowing Fiore to score. Ortega finally got the third out with three strikes on Taki, but the Raccoons’ righty now had a 3-0 lead and had looked thoroughly unassailable so far, and as on a halfway modest 83 pitches through six. He got the 4-5-6 on ten pitches, with a K on Gates, in the seventh, while Kirkwood’s sac fly brought in Rakin’ Royer for a fourth Coons run in the bottom of the inning.

The top of the eighth began with a clean single to left by Seidman, though, and Carlos Mata reached on a Venegas error. Taki remained in against the right-handed Nate Culp pinch-hitting, and got a 6-4-3 double play to ease everybody’s pain. Sanchez popped out to Espinoza, stranding the runner at third base, but Taki was now at 107 pitches. He was retained to bunt, though, when Lonzo batted for Espinoza to begin the bottom 8th, walked against Austin Guastella, and got the runner to second base with the first out. Royer grounded out and Venegas’ floater to shallow right was snatched on the run by Buss, leaving Lonzo at third base. Taki went out for the ninth, but Suggs singled right away, which sugged. A K on Sevilla gave Taki ten on the day, but Jeff Buss first ran a full count and then smashed an RBI triple into the leftfield corner to end his day. Walters took over and struck out two to end the game… but not until after Mario Villa singled home Taki’s second run… 4-2 Coons. Royer 2-4, BB; Fiore 0-1, 3 BB; Taki 8.1 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 10 K, W (6-6) and 1-3;

In other news

May 30 – The Gold Sox beat the Capitals, 6-5 in 15 innings.
May 31 – After 14 innings of 1-1 ball, the Blue Sox’ staff runs out of jazz and collapses for six runs in the top of the 15th against the Wolves, who gladly take the 7-1 win.
June 1 – OCT 3B/SS/RF Ed Soberanes (.225, 7 HR, 25 RBI) might miss most of June with a tear in his hamstring.
June 2 – LAP 2B/SS Ken Sowell (.217, 6 HR, 23 RBI) homers for the only run in a 1-0 win over the Wolves.
June 4 – A high ankle sprain might leave the Warriors without OF Jordan Marroquin (.282, 6 HR, 33 RBI) for two months.
June 4 – The Gold Sox send OF Jose Munoz (.292, 3 HR, 14 RBI), a 31-year-old Cuban rookie, to the Stars for 2B/SS John Miller (.182, 3 HR, 9 RBI) and a prospect.
June 4 – The Aces beat the Knights, 12-5, with ten runs scored in the sixth inning alone, which included two homers, a triple, and a double for Vegas.
June 4 – SAC RF/LF Danny Munn (.214, 8 HR, 25 RBI) beats the Stars with a ninth-inning homer, 1-0.

FL Player of the Week: CIN LF/CF Juan del Toro (.366, 8 HR, 36 RBI), poking .593 (16-27) with 2 HR, 8 RBI
CL Player of the Week: MIL 1B/RF/LF Gaudencio Callaia (.310, 2 HR, 15 RBI), hitting .526 (10-19) with 2 HR, 3 RBI

FL Hitter of the Month: CIN LF/CF Juan del Toro (.350, 8 HR, 34 RBI), batting .344 with 6 HR, 24 RBI
CL Hitter of the Month: TIJ LF Tim Duncan (.285, 13 HR, 44 RBI), swatting .333 with 9 HR, 30 RBI
FL Pitcher of the Month: NAS SP Richard Castillo (4-4, 3.55 ERA), going an unbeaten 4-0 in six starts with 2.22 ERA, 32 K
CL Pitcher of the Month: BOS SP Kenneth Spencer (6-4, 3.86 ERA), hurling for a 5-1 record with 2.19 ERA, 23 K
FL Rookie of the Month: RIC LF/RF Matt Lewandowski (.343, 6 HR, 32 RBI), hitting .379 with 6 HR, 19 RBI
CL Rookie of the Month: MIL 1B Dave Robles (.255, 12 HR, 45 RBI), poking .220 with 6 HR, 20 RBI

Complaints and stuff

Up-and-down 3-3 week, and it surely felt worse. Pitching remains a thing, and the offense … oh boy. Also, with Matt Waters… (looks over to the twitching body on the stretcher in the corner of the room) … actually, I don’t want to speak ill of the dead and dying.

Steve Royer took over as the team’s OPS leader this week, which … sounds wrong on many levels and actually is. Guy oughta bat cleanup, huh?

Lonzo is in a deep slump, 4-for-32 and 8-for-44. Which is such a great segway over to our sponsor, eXtenz0r – if you’re club is slumping, too, take eXtenz0r! … actually, I wanted to get over to the career leaderboard for stolen bases again. Lonzo stole ten bases again this “month”, but this “month” includes five weeks rather than four, and he’s still a rather distant second to Omar Sanchez in the CL (and ABL) this year. Still good enough to gain three spots on the career leaderboard, going up from 24th to 21st this week, with two of the passed players being actives that managed one stolen base between them (Thompson got that one). The rest of the active herd behind Lonzo stole three (Navarro) and two (Russ) in the last “month”.

16th – Alex Torres – 445
17th – Chance Bossert – 437
18th – Ricardo “Cookie” Carmona – 428
19th – Cristo Ramirez – 424 – HOF
20th – Daniel Silva – 417
21st – Lorenzo Lavorano – 415 – active
t-22nd – Danny Flores – 413
t-22nd – Ronnie Thompson – 413 – active
24th – Jose Rivas – 406 – active
25th – Chris Navarro – 398 – active
26th – Andrew Russ – 395 – active

Alex Torres was an Elks nuisance for most of the 2020s and 2030s, leading the league in steals twice and once in homers and RBI, but that was later in his career. Torres was one of only two players with 400+ stolen bases and 200+ home runs (215 exactly) in his career, the other being Crusaders Hall of Famer Martin Ortiz, who had 457 SB and 377 HR.

Chance Bossert was a career Blue Sock, a #1 pick in 2027 and a solid defensive corner infielder with a high-average bat, but no power to speak of. He won a batting title, but hit never more than seven home runs in a season. He was stealing though, winning two theft titles in the FL with a season-high of 70 in ’33. He won two rings with the Sox, but his career ended rather early when his body failed him past his age 33 season.

And then there’s Cookie Carmona, who shouldn’t need much introduction, having his #31 retired by the Raccoons. One of the six older brothers of our front office know-it-all Cristiano, Cookie was much from the same mold as Bossert, except that he was a centerfielder that gradually lost his edge defensively and eventually played more in leftfield than centerfield for his career. He stole 44+ bases three times in his career, winning the CL title in each of those three seasons, and also won the batting title with a .344 mark in 2017. He won a Gold Glove (in rightfield, funnily enough), an All Star nod, and a ring in 2026, but he as not resigned after 2027 and finished his career with a benchwarmer year for the Cyclones in ’28, so didn’t partake in that ring-winning season anymore.

Cookie hit .307 for his career, which is something Lonzo might still do if he ever stopped slumping. Three further former Raccoons were on the stolen base leaderboard ahead of Lonzo: Alex Adame (15th, 447 and counting), Alberto Ramos (4th, 677), and Enrique Trevino (2nd, 708).

Next week: four games in Boston, then three at home against the Gold Sox.

Maud? Maud? – Can we order a box of eXtenz0r?

Fun Fact: Kennedy Adkins is fifth in the All Star ballot for CL starting pitchers.

Maud, how many Kennedy Adkinses do we have?

Just the one, huh?

(scratches himself behind fuzzy ear with hindpaw)

People are weird.