There was an eye-opening headline in my league news today: "Un-four-gettable: Pitcher Hits for Cycle"
Really? I don't have anybody like "Shotime" in my league and besides, the league is all-DH. Why would BNN refer to a "pitcher" accomplishing the feat?
My excitement quickly ebbed when I opened the article. The man's name is Pitcher.
"We better get the pitcher out of there."
"But boss, he's a home run away from a cycle. He just might do it!"
"Not him, you moron. The guy standing on the mound and holding the ball."
"Wow, I keep getting confused. Let's make up a nickname for Ed. How about 'Batter'? I can hear it now: "Now coming to bat, the first baseman, 'Batter' Pitcher. 'Batter' Pitcher, number 13."