[Westheim]

Raccoons (53-51) @ Bayhawks (46-57) – July 29-31, 2041

The Baybirds had lost seven in a row, which sounded like a challenge for the lame-bum Critters. San Francisco ranked fourth in runs scored, but bottoms in runs allowed. Their bullpen was especially terrible. The Coons led the season series, 4-2.

Projected matchups:
Nelson Moreno (6-8, 5.22 ERA) vs. Jeremy Truett (7-6, 4.04 ERA)
Drew Johnson (6-9, 3.53 ERA) vs. Noe Candeloro (7-8, 3.84 ERA)
Bernie Chavez (6-8, 4.03 ERA) vs. Rick Haugh (4-6, 4.18 ERA)

There it was – the rarest thing: a lefty starter inserted for Tuesday!

Game 1
POR: 3B Ramos – SS Hunter – LF Fernandez – CF Maldonado – C Morales – 1B Goetz – 2B Trevino – RF Balaski – P Moreno
SFB: SS J. Gonzalez – 1B S. Ayala – RF D. Martinez – CF M. Hall – 2B Gould – 3B G. Ortiz – LF M. Castillo – C J. Hill – P Truett

The Raccoons’ first hit was an Art Goetz single, while their first run(s) were courtesy of Tony Hunter’s 2-out homer to right in the third inning, scoring Nels, who had dropped a 1-out single. At that point, Moreno held the Bayhawks hitless, but he would give up a home run to the opposing pitcher, Truett, before the third inning was out… It shortened the score to 2-1 through three innings and moved Moreno up the list for deletion to St. Pete as the week developed.

Tony Morales hit a solo jack in the fourth, but that run was eaten up on two Bayhawks singles and Mel Castillo’s sac fly in the bottom of the same inning, 3-2. San Fran also put a pair on in the fifth as Moreno remained unable to get hitters away with two strikes, whiffing just two Bayhawks in five innings, including Truett whenever he didn’t blast a bomb. The Raccoons kept scrambling at least, with Tony Hunter reaching on an error by Sal Ayala to begin the top 6th and stealing his 25th bag before scoring on Jesus Maldonado’s triple to left. Manny Fernandez lined out to Jorge Gonzalez for the second out, but Art Goetz fired a blast to left for a 2-out, 2-run homer to extend the lead to 6-2. Bill Balaski drew a leadoff walk in the seventh, then was doubled in by Berto, who advanced on a Hunter single and scored on a sac fly to center by Manny, 8-2. Moreno wound up squeezing his way through seven innings, retiring the Bayhawks in order in the sixth and seventh innings before being sat down on 105 pitches. The Raccoons then went to new acquisition Terry Garrigan with the intent of having him deliver the final two innings. Ayala opened with a single off him in the bottom 8th, but was doubled up by Dave Martinez. Mike Hall also grounded out, but the ninth began with Thomas Gould and Greg Ortiz reaching. Castillo hit into a fielder’s choice, but John Hill hit an RBI single, and the Raccoons went to Chuck Jones when Dick Oshiita pinch-hit in the #9 hole. Oshiita flew out, but Jorge Gonzalez’ RBI single and a walk to Ayala loaded the bags with the tying run in the box, and that was merely Martinez with 24 homers to his name. Indeed, facing David Lindstrom, he hit a ball over the fence …… after it bounced on the warning track for a 2-run ground-rule double. Hall then flew out to Balaski. 8-6 Raccoons. Ramos 2-5, 2B, RBI; Hunter 3-5, HR, 2 RBI; Goetz 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Moreno 7.0 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 3 K, W (7-8) and 1-2;

The rulebook says that David Lindstrom will get a save for his bothers in this game, but not whether that will save him from my anger.

Game 2
POR: SS Hunter – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – CF Maldonado – C Kilmer – RF Ito – 1B Goetz – 3B Trawick – P Johnson
SFB: SS J. Gonzalez – 1B S. Ayala – RF D. Martinez – CF M. Hall – 2B Gould – 3B G. Ortiz – LF M. Castillo – C Canas – P Candeloro

Hits by Cosmo, Maldo (double), and Kilmer were good enough for two runs in the first inning against Candeloro. Johnson didn’t allow a runner in the first two innings, then started to lose command. He walked one batter in the third, then two in the fourth. Greg Ortiz also hit an RBI double in the inning. Candeloro opened the bottom 5th with a single, moved up on a grounder, then was sent around when Ayala singled to right. Rikuto Ito threw him out at the plate, and also his own arm out of alignment, and Dr. Padilla had to collect him and arrange replacement by Miguel Reyna. To throw some salt into the wounds, Dave Martinez then rammed a score-flipping, 2-out jack to put the Raccoons in arrears, 3-2.

While Johnson had his fur ruffled, the Coons came back in the sixth. Maldo and Kilmer hit 1-out singles off Candeloro, who then gave up a screaming 2-run triple into the rightfield corner to Reyna, giving Portland the lead back, 4-3. Goetz added an RBI single on a 1-2 pitch. Jake Trawick was nicked, Johnson bunted both runners over, but Hunter struck out to strand them. Then Johnson offered a leadoff walk to Gould in the 5-3 game and was soon removed from the bottom 6th. Jon Craig made his Coons debut in style, giving up a double to Mel Castillo that saw Gould thrown out at home plate by Maldonado, then a game-tying homer to Rodrigo Canas, five-all. In the aftermath, the Raccoons couldn’t bring another run across, stranding Tony Hunter at third base in the ninth inning when Manny flew out to Castillo in deep left. Castillo also ended the game after that, taking Alex Ramirez deep to right to lead off the bottom 9th. 6-5 Bayhawks. Trevino 3-5; Maldonado 2-4, 2B, RBI; Kilmer 2-4, RBI; Reyna 1-2, 3B, 2 RBI; Balaski 1-1;

Rikuto Ito was now day-to-day with a sore elbow, which reduced the Raccoons’ bench to three and a half players. Nevertheless, no further deals were made on deadline day. We tried to get some sort of second baseman or outfielder, but didn’t get the right offer.

Game 3
POR: 3B Ramos – SS Hunter – LF Fernandez – CF Maldonado – C Morales – 1B Goetz – 2B Trevino – RF Balaski – P Chavez
SFB: SS J. Gonzalez – 1B S. Ayala – RF D. Martinez – CF M. Hall – 2B Gould – LF M. Castillo – 3B Deming – C J. Hill – P Haugh

Bernie Chavez walked three batters in the first inning, conceding a run on a Mike Hall single that also saw Dave Martinez erased in a rundown, so it could conceivably have come even worse. Bernie would remain shaky after that, mixing in long fly balls with the 3-ball counts, which made for some uncomfortable watching. The Coons had Maldo and Goetz on in the second, but Cosmo hit into a double play. In the fourth inning, they loaded the bases with Hunter, Maldo (reached on a Sonny Deming error) and Morales, then brought up Art Goetz with one out. He hit a sac fly to tie the game, and Cosmo ripped a double to put Portland up, 2-1. Balaski was NOT intentionally walked despite first base being open with two outs and flew out to Hall instead.

Bernie deferred another cockup for another inning, then opened the fifth with a single to right. The bags filled with Berto and Hunter also getting on, hence nobody out, hence without a doubt deflation in due order. Promptly, Manny Fernandez hit into a double play, 4-6-3. Bernie scored, but it was the only score in the inning, with Maldo K’ing. Bernie then gave up that run on a walk, a passed ball, and a Hall single in the bottom of the inning, then also wasn’t seen again after three hits, five walks, five strikeouts, and two runs in five muddy innings.

Top 6th, bags full once more with one out and a leadoff walk dawn by Morales and Cosmo and Balaski singles. Ito batted for Bernie, but was limited to a sac fly. Berto hit a 2-out single to right. Cosmo went for home from second base, with Dave Martinez’ throw off the mark and sending John Hill to chase after it. The error brought Cosmo across and the other runners into scoring position, 5-2, before Hunter and Manny each tacked on a run with a single. Maldonado struck out again, giving a 7-2 lead to the rightfully-maligned bullpen. Terry Garrigan stumbled through the sixth, then was hit for in the top 7th with the bags full AGAIN with the 6-7-8 batters this time, and one out. Right-hander Josh Irwin offered four pitches out of the zone to PH Jeff Kilmer, forcing in a run, while Berto drew a walk in a full count to bring in another. Hunter then killed the effort with a double play. Tim Zimmerman then gave the Raccoons two quick innings with a 7-run lead. Bottom 9th, Lindstrom opened the inning with walks to Castillo and Deming before Hill popped out at 3-1. I sighed. When Oshiita pinch-hit again, Brent Clark came on and got a groundout, then struck out Gonzalez to end the game. 9-2 Coons. Hunter 3-5, RBI; Trevino 3-5, 2B, RBI; Balaski 2-4; Zimmerman 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

Raccoons (55-52) @ Crusaders (61-47) – August 1-4, 2041

Not sure when the Crusaders had become playoff candidates, but I’d take them over the damn Elks any day. But if the Raccoons wanted to remain theoretically relevant, they had to start winning a series against one of the top three teams in the division at some point… New York was fifth in runs scored and second in runs allowed. They also held a 4-3 lead in the season series.

Projected matchups:
Corey Mathers (0-2, 2.93 ERA) vs. Paul Paris (3-4, 4.37 ERA)
Josh Brown (10-4, 3.38 ERA) vs. Todd Lush (9-10, 4.00 ERA)
Nelson Moreno (7-8, 5.07 ERA) vs. Jeff Johnson (9-4, 3.70 ERA)
Drew Johnson (6-9, 3.59 ERA) vs. Ernesto Lujan (10-5, 3.86 ERA)

Lush was another southpaw; this was even a flayed rotation, with various starters (Tommy Iezzi, Dave Hils, Aaron Hickey) on the DL. Included was the rookie to open the set on Thursday; the 23-year-old Paris had been the #3 pick in last year’s draft and had bee-lined his way to the majors. He had made just one appearance in AAA to begin the season before joining the Crusaders, initially in the pen. 95mph cutter and a plus-plus curve on that kid.

Game 1
POR: 3B Ramos – SS Hunter – CF Maldonado – C Morales – 1B Goetz – 2B Trevino – LF – Reyna – RF Balaski – P Mathers
NYC: SS Adame – 3B Graf – CF Besaw – C Alba – 2B Briones – LF Platero – 1B Rudd – RF Salek – P Paris

The Crusaders were driving their manager insane early on, drawing four walks and landing four hits off Corey Mathers in the first three innings and scoring but one meekly run when Mario Briones walked with the bases loaded in the bottom 3rd. This included having the first *two* batters reach base in every inning in the stretch. Rich Salek hit into a double play in the second, and Jose Platero whiffed and Tom Rudd popped out with three on and one out in the third. Meanwhile, the Raccoons appeared barely sentient. Through five innings, they amounted to two base hits, both by Art Goetz, including a leadoff double in the fifth that led absolutely nowhere. Mathers had a clean fourth, then shuffled the bags full with a hit and two walks in the fifth inning and was yanked with the bags full and two outs, and Tom Rudd batting. – Actually, this shambolic performance would serve the Raccoons well in resolving their roster squeeze, allowing us to send Mathers back to AAA and trying Terry Garrigan as a starter next time around. For the time being, Chuck Jones came in and got a groundout to Trevino from Rudd, thus ending the inning and keeping the score, inexplicably, at 1-0 through five.

The Crusaders then got a double from Salek to begin the sixth and plated that runner on Alex Adame’s sac fly. That run was on Jones. The Coons didn’t make the board until after a scoreless appearance from Jon Craig in the bottom 7th, when Manny Fernandez opened the inning by pinch-hitting for him and fired a blast to right for a home run that cut the gap in half. Berto then struck out, but Hunter walked and stole his 26th bag. Maldonado was about to pop out foul at 0-2, but Rudd dropped the ball in foul ground, extending the at-bat until Paris nicked Maldo with a 2-2 pitch. That was Paris’ end, with right-hander Mike Gutierrez replacing him against Tony Morales, which was perhaps not the greatest choice on paper. On the field, though, both Morales and Goetz struck out, ending the top 8th. In the ninth, ex-Coon Josh Livingston retired the first two before allowing a single to Bill Balaski. Jeff Kilmer pinch-hit in the #9 hole, sent a fly to deep left … but not long enough. He flew out to Fabien Ugolino. 2-1 Crusaders. Goetz 2-4, 2B; Fernandez (PH) 1-1, HR, RBI;

Corey Mathers (0-3, 2.78 ERA) was thus assigned back to St. Pete. By the way, everybody loves Steve Nickas, right?

Right?

Game 2
POR: SS Hunter – 2B Trevino – RF Fernandez – CF Maldonado – C Kilmer – 1B Goetz – LF Trawick – 3B Nickas – P Brown
NYC: LF Rudd – 3B Graf – CF Besaw – 2B Briones – RF Platero – C D. Phillips – SS Miles – 1B Lovett – P Lush

Portland scored quick in the Friday affair, with Hunter drawing a walk, Cosmo whacking a double, and Maldonado crushing a 3-run homer to overcome Manny Fernandez’ comebacker. Then Brown put on the first three purple hats that appeared at the plate, yielding a walk and two singles before Briones hit into a fielder’s choice and Platero grounded into a double play to stop the shenanigans at one run on Joe Besaw’s RBI single. Instead, come the bottom 2nd, he served up the first major league hit of rookie Adam Lovett – a 420-footer to left, narrowing the lead to 3-2.

Brown was then completely taken apart in the third inning, the conclusion of which he wouldn’t witness. Rudd, Joe Graf, Joe Besaw all singled to begin the inning. Briones tied the game with a fielder’s choice grounder, while in full counts Platero walked and Devin Phillips hit an RBI single, 4-3. Tyler Miles whacked a 2-run single, the runners reached scoring position, and at 6-3 it was ENOUGH. Lindstrom replaced Brown, surrendered a 3-run homer to the ******* rookie Lovett, and I couldn’t quite decide whether I wanted to throw myself off the top deck right away or wait for the players in the poo-colored shirts to walk off the field to strangle them individually, and only THEN throw myself off the top deck.

Anyway, it was 9-3 through three innings, and thus game violently over. Lindstrom pitched through the conclusion of five, surrendering another run in the fourth and a Lovett single in the fifth, both of which added an equal amount of thickness to my strained neck. Portland, after conceding TEN runs unanswered, responded with Maldo and Kilmer singles in the sixth inning. Maldo went for third base, Besaw threw the ball wildly across the infield for an error, and Maldo scored, 10-4, with Kilmer into scoring position, where he was left to wither and die. Tyler Miles homered off Zimmerman in the bottom 7th for an extra run before things mildly escalated when Joe Graf decided to be a ******* **** in the eighth inning. Reaching base on a walk offered by Brent Clark, Graf with a 7-run lead and two outs from his team being done batting for the day, stole not one, but two bases off the Coons. New pitcher Terry Garrigan got a subtle sign from the bench – bench coach Erik Mango pointing between his own black googly eyes with grim expression – to ******* drill the next batter – Besaw – which Garrigan promptly did. He also nailed PH Fabien Ugolino without a prompt, which got the Crusaders on the top of their dugout railing, but no fight broke out. They also didn’t score, leaving the bases loaded when Phillips grounded out to Ramos at third base. Berto had entered earlier in a double switch; he also made the final out of the game. After Tony Morales hit into a double play to erase Balaski’s leadoff single in the ninth, Berto struck out feebly. 11-4 Crusaders. Maldonado 2-3, BB, HR, 3 RBI; Balaski (PH) 1-1;

We will henceforth lovingly call this the Adam Lovett game. In a way I wished he’d hit another homer (he grounded out his final time up) so we could have relished in the infamy forever.

Not even that – lasting infamy – is something this team can achieve. They’re just plain old boilerplate bad.

Game 3
POR: 3B Ramos – SS Hunter – LF Fernandez – C Morales – 1B Goetz – RF Balaski – CF Reyna – 2B Nickas – P Moreno
NYC: SS Adame – CF Graf – C Alba – 2B Briones – LF Platero – 1B Rudd – CF Ugolino – RF Salek – P J. Johnson

Not walking Steve Nickas (.125, 0 HR, 1 RBI) intentionally in the second inning with Balaski and Reyna in scoring position and two outs was an entirely defensible call that nevertheless backfired on the Crusaders immediately when Nickas uncharacteristically shot a hard grounder through Joe Graf for a 2-run double up the line for the first runs in the game. Moreno then struck out, although his batting was not our chief concern at this stage. He walked Graf (who stole second again) in the first, then allowed singles to Rudd and Salek in the second inning, but for now the Crusaders did not bring him to harm. Graf singled again in the third inning, but was doubled up by Fernando Alba to end the inning before he could get any ideas. The Crusaders would out-hit the Coons through five innings, 4-3, but didn’t get a run on the board.

While Jeff Johnson shut down the Critters, whiffing seven through six innings, Moreno’s K-ing of Graf to begin the bottom 6th was only his third strikeout of the day. He then briskly proceeded to yield singles to Alba and Briones, but then started a 1-4-3 double play on a Platero bouncer to elope danger. Then Tom Rudd opened the seventh with a “triple” on which Miguel Reyna oughta get an offensive assist – I was surely much offended by him first rushing in, then leaving skidmarks and racing back, chasing the ball all the way to the fence. Moreno walked Ugolino, but Salek popped out. The Crusaders did not hit for Johnson, who flew out to Manny. Rudd went for home – where he was met by Morales and the baseball and slapped out to end the seventh. After 103 pitches, that was almost it for Moreno, but he’d come back out to face Adame in the bottom 8th, a righty batter before we planned to go to Jones. He gave up a single, while Jones gave up a single to Graf. Adame went to third base, from where he scored on Alba’s double play grounder. Briones doubled off Alex Ramirez after that, but somehow the inning didn’t fall apart and the Raccoons might actually get to use a terribly bored Wyatt Hamill for once. No insurance runs came about – the Coons only amounted to six hits total in regulation – and Hamill would not face three left-handers as scheduled, but a flock of right-handed pinch-hitters. The first two – Phillips and Lovett – both flew out to Balaski. Justin LeClerc struck out. 2-1 Coons. Morales 2-4; Nickas 2-3, 2B, 2 RBI; Moreno 7.0 IP, 8 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 3 K, W (8-8);

We would get a different opponent on Sunday. Right-hander Chris Inderrieden, 33, had been left over on the free agent market and had not signed until this week, getting a $405k deal for the last two months from the Crusaders. He had gone 8-10 with a 4.82 ERA for Cincy last year, and would make his season debut against the Critters. We were hoping for some rust having accumulated on him.

Game 4
POR: 3B Ramos – 2B Trevino – LF Fernandez – CF Maldonado – C Kilmer – RF Balaski – 1B Goetz – SS Nickas – P D. Johnson
NYC: SS Adame – 3B Graf – CF Besaw – C Alba – LF Platero – RF Salek – 2B Miles – 1B Rudd – P Inderrieden

Berto stole his 13th base of the year (and 670th of his career) in the first inning after opening the game with a single to left. Cosmo walked before the big boys in the 3-4 slots struck out. Kilmer hit a single to load the bags and Balaski was up 3-0 on Inderrieden before ripping away. I screamed in horror, but his fly to right stretched beyond the glove of Salek and fell for a bases-clearing double, putting Portland up 3-0 in the first again (because that worked so well on Friday…). Thankfully, Art Goetz topped things off with a home run to straightaway center, 5-0, before Nickas grounded out. Yup, looks like rust to me. Poor Chris Inderrieden logged only one more out on Drew Johnson before being dismembered and swallowed by the long-toothed Critters. Berto singled, Cosmo got on, Manny plated both of them with a screaming liner, and then Maldonado mashed a 2-run homer to seal the deal on Inderrieden: nine runs, all earned, in 1.1 innings.

The Critters made it ten runs by the third inning when Berto singled home Goetz, before Drew Johnson tried to blow the lead in the bottom of the inning, getting socked around for five hits and as many runs, starting with a single by reliever Mike Lynn, who then drew a leadoff walk the next inning. There was some stern talking to Johnson on the mound at that stage… The Crusaders had seven hits and three walks on him through four, against no strikeouts. At least Lynn was gone with nobody out in the fifth, walking Nickas before Joe Graf’s throwing error put both Nickas and Johnson in scoring position. Ex-Coon Chris Wise came in to whiff Berto, but conceded one run on Cosmo’s grounder, and two more when Manny took him deep.

…and yet, despite THIRTEEN ******* runs of support, Johnson didn’t get the ******* W. Platero opened the bottom 5th with a double, Salek walked, and then he was yanked. (He was on 89 pitches anyway.) Chuck Jones came on and got two outs before surrendering a 2-run double to Adam Lovett, who was hurriedly becoming my favorite player on another team… it was thus 13-7 through five, in case you had trouble keeping up. The Critters would not reach base in the next two innings, but the Crusaders put two on in the sixth, then had Tyler Miles whack a leadoff double off Jon Craig in the bottom 7th. Tom Rudd flew out to Balaski. Miles went for third base, Balaski unleashed another catastrophic throw, and Miles scored on the error as the little ball (the baseball) kept rolling away from a panting big ball (Ramos) in foul territory, 13-8. Then the next three batters loaded the bases against Craig, who was yanked for Ramirez, who allowed one run on a Besaw groundout, 13-9. The real question was not whether the Raccoons would win this game at this point, but whether Hamill would blow the save or whether they’d get it done in the eighth already. Maldo shot a triple in the eighth, the first Coons runner since the fifth inning and also the third leg of the cycle, for which he was only missing the single at this stage. He scored on Kilmer’s single, but Balaski ended the inning with a lineout. A Miles triple and a subsequent Ramirez error also got the Crusaders into double digits, 14-10, with two outs in the bottom 8th. When Alex Adame ripped a 2-out double, the Raccoons brought Hamill into the game in a double switch. Joe Graf ended the inning with a HARD liner at Manny Fernandez. The Coons fizzled out in the ninth before Maldonado got a chance to bat again, and Hamill retired the Crusaders in order before I could blow a gasket. 14-10 Critters. Ramos 3-6, RBI; Fernandez 2-5, HR, 4 RBI; Maldonado 3-5, HR, 3B, 2B, 2 RBI; Kilmer 2-3, 2 BB, 2 RBI; Goetz 2-4, HR, 2 RBI; Ito 1-1;

Chuck Jones got the win by virtue of being the first to replace Drew “Choking” Johnson. He logged four outs for no runs on his own ledger.

In other news

July 29 – The Titans deal SP Rich Willett (10-3, 2.71 ERA) to the Scorpions for five prospects, none of them ranked.
July 29 – Capitals CL Roland Warner (2-2, 3.31 ERA, 21 SV) will miss a month with a sprained ankle.
July 30 – The Capitals put 10 runs on the Wolves in the seventh inning on their way to a 13-2 win. Batting eighth, Washington’s 2B/3B Rich Falzone (.241, 6 HR, 39 RBI) has a home run, two walks, and drives in four runs.
July 30 – The Miners get SP Israel Mendoza (2-9, 4.22 ERA) from the Aces for two prospects. The package includes #64 prospect OF Enrique Jara.
July 31 – The Cyclones will be without 1B Danny Santillano (.328, 14 HR, 60 RBI) for the month of August. The 35-year-old slugger is out with a broken hand.

FL Player of the Week: CIN 3B Jesus Burgos (.296, 2 HR, 36 RBI), batting .480 (12-25) with 1 HR, 6 RBI
CL Player of the Week: NYC LF/CF Joe Besaw (.302, 7 HR, 79 RBI), hitting .519 (14-27) with 1 HR, 11 RBI

FL Hitter of the Month: TIJ/WAS INF Chris Strohm (.288, 4 HR, 54 RBI), batting .426 with 1 HR, 17 RBI
CL Hitter of the Month: NYC LF/CF Joe Besaw (.295, 7 HR, 75 RBI), hitting .351 with 4 HR, 26 RBI
FL Pitcher of the Month: SAC SP Craig Czyszczon (14-4, 2.64 ERA), twirling for a 5-0 record with 0.46 ERA, 19 K
CL Pitcher of the Month: IND SP Jake Jackson (9-9, 3.39 ERA), pitching to a 4-0 mark with 1.97 ERA, 41 K
FL Rookie of the Month: RIC LF Pablo Gonzalez (.299, 14 HR, 48 RBI), swatting .311 with 6 HR, 14 RBI
CL Rookie of the Month: SFB C John Hill (.326, 2 HR, 20 RBI), all of which he hit for this month

Complaints and stuff

What a weird week. We have another scrub to hate (Adam Lovett), and Steve Nickas actually won a ******* ballgame all on his own. Now, he’s not a great hitter by any stretched definition of “great” or “hitter” (.198, 1 HR, 18 RBI for his career), but he’ll be able to show his grandkits that Saturday box score at some point and explain how that W was *all* their old Grandpa Steve.

It’s also not that I didn’t try to get Manny Fernandez a ring before the deadline, but we didn’t get a good enough offer for him to pull the trigger. In the end only Levis was shipped out. Whether Goetz is a long-term answer is doubtful; there are some hostile scouting reports of him out there.

Angelo Montano came off the DL on the weekend. Rather than add him to the glut of pitching on the roster at that point, we sent him on a rehab assignment to AAA.

Anthony Spooner signed this week, becoming a Bayhawk. The 16-year-old inked for $1.42M for his own coffers, which also netted the Bayhawks, who had already signed five other teenagers for $207k, a hefty tax bill from the league office amounting to another $1.07M. Even though the Raccoons would have gotten away a little cheaper (for the first time in many years we did not sign a single player), this would have broken our budget before trading away Doug Levis’ remaining salary on Monday.

Fun Fact: The Raccoons are by now seven games over their pythagorean record, tied with another Oregon team.

At least the Wolves would still have a winning record. The Coons oughta be 50-61, which sounds rough.

Despite that unhinged bullpen of ours, we remain far and above everybody else in 1-run games and extra-inning affairs. While the 25-18 record in the former category is not the best in the league (but close), with the Falcons leading the charge there, our 13-2 extra-inning record is unrivalled by anybody. Only the Stars (10-5) are even vaguely in the same ballpark. Closest by winning percentage would be the Falcons, but they get discarded on account of a small sample size (3-1).

The Raccoons haven’t deviated from their pythagorean record by more than six games in over 30 years. 2007 was the last time we were seven over (but still fell to the Crusaders). The last time we were at least seven under was wretched, wicked 1997, when the team was hit by every falling piano imaginable and ended up 14 games under their pythagorean record of 82-80.

…and, you know, kicked off the decade of darkness.