[Westheim]

(stands in the middle of the office with Maud, both looking at the ceiling, staring at seven orange paw prints in the middle of the ceiling)

No, Maud, I have no idea. – Yes, but why are the paw prints only in the middle of the ceiling? – Oh, wait-wait-wait… I think I know who it was! I bet it was Cristiano!

Maud, why are you looking at me like this??

+++

January 4 – The Capitals sign 32-year-old former Raccoons SP Raffaello Sabre (96-86, 3.58 ERA) to a 5-yr, $22M contract. The Raccoons receive the Capitals’ #17 pick and a pick in the supplemental round for compensation.
January 12 – The Miners ink ex-NAS SP Donovan Mason (65-45, 3.49 ERA, 29 SV) to a 2-yr, $4.72M contract.
January 29 – Dallas picks up former Loggers hurler Alfredo Vargas (126-112, 4.22 ERA, 1 SV) for two years and $6.08M.
January 29 – Los Angeles signs former Scorpion 1B/LF Alvin Zuazo (.281, 54 HR, 342 RBI) for 2-yr, $6.68M.

+++

The #17 pick was the second-best (after the Loggers’ #13 pick) available pick that had not already changed hands this offseason. Given that there were two fourth-round picks on offer if Sabre would have joined the Warriors or Pacifics, we got out of this one plenty fine!

Please, Maud, stop sobbing. We all liked Sabre. – I also liked Sabre! – Because I didn’t like him to the tune of $4.4M per season.

Seriously - $4.4M per year make Sabre a top 10 earner in the league (tied for 10th with Jimmy Driver). He’s less than a full season away from a full pension and hasn’t even won 100 major league games yet – how good a pitcher can he actually be??

That Vargas deal? That’s the second third-round pick the Loggers get for their departures. Some teams always get the very worst deal. The Raccoons are lucky in that regard – they only get the very worst deal on days ending in Y.

We also had some abortive talks with free agent closer option Gualter Cymbron, who thought he merited a 6-year deal. We didn’t give a 5-year deal to Sabre, so we’ll give six to a second-rate closer, sure…

As far as other former Raccoons were concerned, Elijah Williams got only $374k from the Caps;

+++

2041 HALL OF FAME VOTING

No players were elected to the Hall of Fame this year. It is the second year in a row that no player has reached the 75% threshold for induction, and the third time since the Hall of Fame voting process replaced the Secret Ninja Committee in 2004 that the Hall received no new players in consecutive years. This most recently happened in 2030-31, then following a 4-year span in which four players were inducted every year. Only seven players have been inducted in the last seven years.

Full voting results with voting percentage and the number of times the player has been on the ballot:

CIN 3B Eddie Moreno – 6th – 66.7
MIL SP Chris Sinkhorn – 3rd – 47.0
SFW SS Jamie Wilson – 6th – 34.6
??? CL Jarrod Morrison – 9th – 26.5
PIT C J.J. Henley – 1st – 24.8
??? SP Ian Van Meter – 9th – 20.9
SFW C Mike Thompson – 1st – 15.4
??? SP Ernest Green – 8th – 9.0
TOP CL Mike Baker – 4th – 6.8
NAS C Pat Walston – 10th – 6.4 – DROPPED
PIT MR Nick Salinas – 1st. – 6.4
CHA 1B Pat Fowlkes – 1st – 6.4
WAS SP Eric Williams – 2nd – 3.4 – DROPPED
IND 1B Jon Gonzalez – 1st – 2.1 – DROPPED
BOS C Keith Leonard – 3rd – 1.3 – DROPPED
LAP LF Terry Kopp – 1st – 1.3 – DROPPED
NYC SP Mike Rutkowski – 2nd – 1.3 – DROPPED
IND RF Cesar Martinez – 2nd – 1.3 – DROPPED
??? SP Carlos Marron – 1st – 0.4 – DROPPED
WAS RF Tsuneyoshi Tachibana – 1st – 0.0 – DROPPED

There is no surefire Hall of Famer on nxt year’s entry list, either. But I’m sure we’ll elect some old bum eventually…

For now, I’m going home though. Goodnight, Maud. Goodnight, Slappy. Goodnight, Cristiano.

(obliviously walks past Cristiano, who is cleaning apricot marmalade off a plastic paw shape at the end of a six-foot stick)