[Westheim]

Raccoons (2-3) vs. Bayhawks (3-4) – April 9-11, 2035

The good news (?) was that even after the weekend massacre, a new day dawned over Portland. The bad news were in no particular order that the Bayhawks were in town right away, we had lost six of nine against them last year, and that wasn’t the only arrival. The team that had conceded the second-most runs and almost six per game was joined in Portland by the Raccoons’ owner Nick Valdes, who somehow hadn’t gotten the news on the weekend and thought the Critters were still undefeated. Talk about rude awakenings.

Projected matchups:
Bernie Chavez (1-0, 6.35 ERA) vs. Jose Lerma (1-0, 5.14 ERA)
Colt Willes (1-0, 4.76 ERA) vs. Ben Lipsky (0-0, 18.00 ERA)
Raffaello Sabre (0-1, 9.53 ERA) vs. Jesus Rodarte (0-0, 3.38 ERA)

Southpaws would bookmark the array of Bayhawk hurlers in this series.

Justin Fowler was again not in the lineup on Monday, but we were eyeing a Tuesday return now.

Game 1
SFB: 2B K. Elder – SS J. Cruz – 3B D. Myers – 1B Dupuis – LF Hawthorne – CF A. Castillo – RF Pridgeon – C Resendez – P Lerma
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Stalker – 1B Avakian – RF Salgado – LF Wallace – 3B Zeltser – CF M. Fernandez – C Wall – P Chavez

Straight base hits by the 4-5-6 batters gave the Coons a run and Critters on the corners to begin the bottom 2nd. Manny Fernandez chipped in a sac fly to make it 2-0 and get his first RBI of the year, while Wall flew out and Bernie fanned to end the inning. Himself, Bernie struck out five against one base hit the first time through, but the general sucking of the rotation was not going to stop any time soon; come the fourth inning, the Bayhawks landed singles via John Dupuis and George Hawthorne, and Alex Castillo crashed a fastball for a 2-out, 3-run homer. When Valdes asked whether that happened often, I just kept drinking.

Not all was lost yet; Jimmy Wallace caught a Jose Cruz drive with two Bayhawks on base in the fifth that initially had looked like certain doom, so apparently his legs were working after all… and in the bottom 5th Berto led off with a single to right before Stalker banged a ball off the fence for a game-tying RBI double. Avakian, batting .174 after a good showing in Vancouver, was walked intentionally, and the bags were full after Hugo Salgado snuck a grounder through between Kenny Elder and Cruz, and with nobody out. Valdes clapped his hands with passion, but I feared nothing but more desolation from the 5-6-7 batters. Lerma ran a 1-1 count against Jimmy Wallace before hanging a breaking ball right in the sweet spot. Jimmy’s whiskers twitched sharply upwards and he unloaded a ball to right-center for 423 feet – GRAAAAAAAAND SLAAAAAAAMMMMM!!!

The slam ended Lerma’s day at once, but the Coons still had to pitch to get that 7-3 lead to the finish line, and it would have to be done without Bernie Chavez, who was yanked after conceding three singles to four batters in the sixth inning. Dupuis, Hawthorne, and Jaden Pridgeon were on base for Jorge Resendez with one out, facing Dusty Kulp, who registered the K before also seeing pinch-hitter Luigi Banfi, who flew out to center on the first pitch. (exhales!) Bottom 6th, right-hander Rick Haugh got burned for several runs; PH Edgar Barrios opened with a single, his first Coons hit, Berto doubled, and Tim Stalker tripled both of them home. At this point, an Avakian homer would have completed a natural cycle for the team, but we had to be content with a sac fly to left, which nevertheless increased the lead to 10-3. Barrios stayed in the game afterwards, with Berto being spared the last few innings – it was going to be a long week. Justin Fowler hit an RBI single as pinch-hitter the following inning, in which the Coons put two runs on Tony Rivas. Tim Stalker drove in the other run with Barrios and Marsingill (running for Fowler) on the corners. Barrios scored on the double, while Marsingill was thrown out at the plate. Rivas was made to endure by the Bayhawks, ended up walking two in the bottom 8th, and had them tripled in by Manny Fernandez with two outs. Nick Valdes was enthusiastic, I was laying off knotting a good piece of rope for another day, and the Raccoons won by 11 in the end. 14-3 Furballs! Ramos 2-4, 2B; Fowler (PH) 1-1, RBI; Stalker 4-5, 3B, 2 2B, 4 RBI; Salgado 3-5, 2B; Wallace 2-4, HR, 4 RBI; Barrios (PH) 2-3, 2B; Prieto 2.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 3 K;

Bernie struck out nine in 5.1 innings and he’s now 2-0 with a 5.73 ERA. The thing that gives me some solace early on is that at least the opposition seems to mostly score in bunches, e.g. bad luck could be a big factor here. Not all is lost.

Yet.

Game 2
SFB: 2B K. Elder – SS J. Cruz – 3B D. Myers – 1B Dupuis – LF Hawthorne – CF A. Castillo – RF Levis – C Resendez – P Lipsky
POR: SS Ramos – 3B Zeltser – 1B Avakian – CF Fowler – LF Wallace – RF M. Fernandez – 2B Barrios – C Scheffer – P Willes

Alex Castillo homered to lead off the second after a first inning in which Willes walked a pair. Willes would run a whole bunch of 3-ball counts, but even then offense was remarkably low for the Bayhawks, who managed only one more hit, one more walk, and no more runs through five. The Raccoons managed a Barrios single… and that was about it. Scheffer doubled him up in that bottom of the third, and grounded out in the sixth after Barrios hit another leadoff single. Willes grounded out, and Ramos lined to left, but Hawthorne got his stupid glove on the ball, ending the inning. Willes came back for the seventh, throwing four balls to leadoff man Castillo, and after Doug Levis’ groundout also walked Jorge Resendez. Lipsky’s bunt advanced the runners and ended Willes’ day after 105 mostly messy pitches with five walks. Luigi Banfi pinch-hit for Elder before we brought Wise on at all, and flew out on the first pitch, stranding those two runners. The Coons also left two on, Fowler and Wallace on the corners, when Manny Fernandez popped out foul in the bottom 7th. Valdes was not amused, pointing out that the other team had more “R”s than the Raccoons, and how could that be, when there was no R in Bayhawks, but a huge R in Raccoons!?

Then came the ninth inning. Ed Blair needed some work, having pitched once in the first six games, and was tasked with holding the Bayhawks at 1-0. He started by walking Castillo, then balking the runner to second base. Doug Levis singled in front of Fernandez, Castillo was sent for home, and thrown out by Manny. Levis moved up to second, then reached third on Resendez’ single. Justin Uliasz pinch-hit for Lipsky, lined hard to the right side, but Avakian caught the ball and tagged a surprised Resendez for a 3-U double play to end the inning. Ed Blair looked around cautiously as he left the mound, but he had indeed just survived that royal mess without a scath… Bottom 9th, right-hander Jimmy Lohrey and his 18.00 ERA against the top of the order. Berto grounded out. Zeltser flew out to right. Avakian flew out to left. 1-0 Bayhawks. Barrios 2-3;

No, Nick, we didn’t win. – Yes, Nick, they had more “R”s than us right til the end. – No, I don’t know why it works this way. – Because then the Warriors would win every game?

Game 3
SFB: 2B K. Elder – SS J. Cruz – 3B D. Myers – RF Suhay – LF Hawthorne – CF A. Castillo – 1B Levis – C Resendez – P Rodarte
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Stalker – RF Salgado – CF Fowler – LF Wallace – C Wall – 3B Zeltser – 1B Marsingill – P Sabre

Kurt Wall throwing out Jose Cruz trying to nip second base bailed out Sabre from having runners on the corners in the third inning, just when he looked like he was melting in a scoreless game. The Portland offense kept being absent, and Rodarte retired them in order the first time through. Berto would be our first runner, walking and stealing second base in the bottom 4th. While Rodarte also nailed Salgado, the rest of the team couldn’t figure out what to do with the bats, and between grinding my teeth and trying to resist the urge to not outright strangle a nagging Nick Valdes, I had a hard, no-fun time at the game. While Sabre occasionally wobbled but didn’t fall through six, Rodarte didn’t allow a single base knock. He walked Stalker and Salgado with two down in the bottom 6th, but Fowler flew out to Ben Suhay. – No, Nick, we don’t have a hit yet. – Do YOU see an H in “Raccoons”??

Salgado held Sabre’s game in one piece in the seventh, retiring Resendez on his liner with two outs and Suhay and Levis on the corners. Jimmy Wallace then banished the specter of a no-hitter with a leadoff single that dropped just in front of Suhay in the bottom of the inning. Kurt Wall cranked the very next pitch over the fence in left, breaking the ice, and after that Zeltser and Marsingill also reached base. Then Sabre bunted badly for a force on Zeltser, and Berto hit into a perfect 6-4-3 double play… The Bayhawks batted for Rodarte to begin the eighth, which we had expected, but at least they sent Banfi, the righty bat again. Sabre, on 94 pitches, stayed in to face him, but leaked a walk. Garavito came on with two switch-hitters up next, fanned Elder, but walked Jose Cruz. Prieto took over, whiffed Dave Myers, and that brought up all-or-nothing Ben Suhay, who fell to 1-2… and got nothing, *swinging* like there was a bonus on bat speed, ad missed the low pitch by a mile. Ed Blair got a meaningful ninth this time, allowed a leadoff single to Hawthorne, threw a wild pitch, walked Resendez with two outs, and somehow fanned Uliasz with the tying runs aboard to squeak out a win in the rubber game… 2-0 Critters. Sabre 7.0 IP, 6 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 3 K, W (1-1);

That was a bit too close for comfort…

Speaking of too close for comfort, so was Nick Valdes. We were productive overnight. Maud found an almost untouched coastal hiking trail off US-101 and Cristiano Carmona forged an oil drilling permit for that area form the Department of Power. We then casually left that permit next to Valdes’ breakfast on Thursday, calculating correctly that Valdes couldn’t resist starting to drill immediately, which would get him out of town and into enough trouble with the state police to leave us alone through the weekend.

We saved our backup plan for another time, which consisted of Chad drawing a treasure map of a pirate-infested islet in the Caribbean.

Now we just had to get rid of the Titans…

Raccoons (4-4) vs. Titans (4-5) – April 12-15, 2035

Neither team had gotten the start to the season they expected, and we were both well off the division-leading … Loggers? The Titans were tied for eighth (with us) in runs scored and fifth in runs allowed (Coons: 2nd), with a pathetic .220 batting average, but an almost untouched bullpen with a 1.71 ERA. We had won only five games against them in ’34 and that had cost us an October ticket. Beating them had to start now.

Projected matchups:
Ignacio del Rio (0-1, 7.20 ERA) vs. Rich Willett (0-1, 3.68 ERA)
Gilberto Rendon (0-1, 5.40 ERA) vs. Adam Potter (1-0, 0.00 ERA)
Bernie Chavez (2-0, 5.73 ERA) vs. Tony Chavez (0-1, 14.14 ERA)
Colt Willes (1-1, 2.92 ERA) vs. Jeff Dykstra (1-0, 2.25 ERA)

Only one southpaw (Chavez) of their two (Tim Wells was 0-1 with a 4.50 ERA) to contend with here. Ace candidate Mario Gonzalez was still on the DL with elbow ligament surgery from last year. SS Keith Spataro was day-to-day with a rib cage muscle that bothered him.

Game 1
BOS: 3B Gil – 1B J. Elder – RF M. Avila – LF W. Vega – SS Spataro – C J. Young – 2B R. West – CF M. Walker – P Willett
POR: SS Ramos – 3B Zeltser – 1B Avakian – CF Fowler – LF Wallace – RF M. Fernandez – 2B Stalker – C Wall – P del Rio

A Fowler double and two productive outs, including Manny Fernandez’ sac fly, created a run in the second inning that was pretty much the only offense early on. The Critters, in fact, didn’t log another base hit until Manny homered in solo fashion in the fifth. Del Rio whiffed five through six innings and allowed only three hits. He walked nobody… or at least until he walked Spataro to begin the seventh inning. Jim Young was retired on a sparkling catch by Fowler – I screamed like a girl while our $14M man was in mid-flight – and Rhett West hit into a double play to get out of the inning. Justin Fowler homered with one out in the bottom of the inning; like Fernandez’ shot it was a solo edition, but extended the lead to 3-0. Del Rio started the eighth inning, got Mark Walker out, but then allowed a single to Willett (!), and was yanked. Hennessy replaced him for Antonio Gil, who singled, and when Dusty Kulp took over the spot on the mound he got Jay Elder on a fly to right, but allowed a single to Moises Avila. Willett scored, but Gil was thrown out by Fowler trying to reach third base, ending the inning. The score remained 3-1 after the Coons’ half of the eighth, and with Blair coming off two straight days of pitching, none of them great, we weren’t too keen on having him face the Titans right here. With two lefty bats due up, David Fernandez got the ball, fell to 3-1 on Willie Vega, who lined to left-center, and Justin Fowler made another potentially neck-breaking catch. Fernandez was far from sharp, but somehow got through the Titans before he could get through the lead, and a win was a win was a win … 3-1 Coons. Fowler 2-3, 2B, RBI; M. Fernandez 1-2, HR, 2 RBI; Salgado (PH) 1-1; del Rio 7.1 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 5 K, W (1-1);

Neither Avakian nor Zeltser were hitting much of anything right now. Both remained in the lineup for Friday, but would likely sit on Saturday against the lefty… Yeah, that’s how we’ll cure the offense. More Justin Marsingill…

Game 2
BOS: 3B Gil – 1B J. Elder – RF M. Avila – LF W. Vega – SS Spataro – C J. Young – 2B R. West – CF M. Walker – P Potter
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Stalker – LF Wallace – CF Fowler – 1B Avakian – RF M. Fernandez – 3B Zeltser – C Scheffer – P Rendon

With a grim weather forecast, Rendon allowed a single to Elder, walked Avila, and then somehow bailed out with Vega’s 4-6-3 grounder in the first inning. Jimmy Wallace hit a solo jack in the bottom of the inning, his third of the year. To start the bottom 2nd, Adam Avakian livened up a .133 batting average with a single, Fernandez doubled to left, and the bottom of the order saw a pair in scoring position. Zeltser whiffed, Scheffer barely managed a run-scoring groundout, and Rendon fanned, AND it started to rain. It was only a drizzle for the moment, but we sure hoped that Rendon could hold on to the lead…

And he did for a while. The Coons didn’t do much more with the bats early on, but Rendon lined up four scoreless before running out of luck in the fifth inning. Spataro drew another leadoff walk, then reached third base on Jim Young’s single. The Critters went on to concede that lead run during the following groundouts, but kept Young stranded at second base to maintain a 2-1 edge in mostly moist conditions. Berto singled and stole a base in the bottom 5th, but was left on by Stalker and Wallace. In turn, Rendon issued another leadoff walk in the sixth, now to Antonio Gil, and Elder singled. He rung up Avila, but gave up a single to leftfield to Vega, the bases were loaded, and Rendon was yanked. Chris Wise struck out Spataro, then had Young at 0-2 before allowing a screaming liner to rightfield… but Fernandez got there in time to make the catch, stranding three Titans as the inning came to a close.

Wise retired West to begin the seventh before yielding for Hennessy, who struck out all three batters he faced in enigmatic fashion. Prieto got two outs against a walk to conclude the eighth, but the lame Coons offense couldn’t do anything to add to their skinny 2-1 lead, which ended up with Ed Blair facing the 5-6-7 batters in the ninth. He promptly walked Keith Spataro. Young then hit a comebacker that Blair pounced on and turned into a force at second base, which was good, since it replaced the tying run with a snail-paced “runner”. Blair went on to walk West and give up a single to Walker. The bases were loaded, David Lessman was pinch-hitting, and the Raccoons were largely out of ideas. Agony broke out – but the Raccoons were also running low on ammunition in their pen. Garavito was pretty much the only pitcher left over, and while he was a good match for David Lessman, there was no guarantee he would strike him out. Blair still seemed like the best bet for a strikeout. Blair remained in the game, faced Lessman, and the Titans’ catcher poked the first pitch into play. RIGHT AT STALKER. To Berto! To first! DOUBLE PLAY!!! 2-1 Critters!!

First time we won back-to-back games from Boston since 2033… also the fourth game in a row where neither team managed to score even four runs.

Game 3
BOS: 3B Gil – 1B J. Elder – RF M. Avila – LF W. Vega – SS Spataro – C J. Young – 2B R. West – CF M. Walker – P T. Chavez
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Stalker – 1B Salgado – CF Fowler – LF Wallace – C Wall – RF Hall – 3B Marsingill – P B. Chavez

The game started with three straight Titans reaching base. Gil did so on a Salgado error, but was then caught stealing. Elder singled, Avila walked, but Bernie then got his **** together and struck out the next two to get out of the inning. Bernie would need almost 60 pitches through three innings, however, walking three and whiffing six, so an already well-worked Raccoons bullpen was looking at another four innings or so of work this Saturday. The offense continued to do NOTHING for Portland, and Jim Young popped a homer off Bernie in the fourth for the first marker on the scoreboard. It didn’t necessarily get any better from here, as our Chavez walked both West and Gil, then got a 2-out pop from Jay Elder that Salgado dropped as he chased it around first base. Bags full, Moises Avila coaxed a walk in a full count, forcing home a run, before Vega grounded out to Ramos to end the inning. That was on Chavez’ 91st pitch of the game, and he was as good as done in a 2-0 deficit.

A seventh walk to Young ended Bernie Chavez’ game with one out in the fifth. Garavito came on in a desperate bid for length, allowed a single to West, but then got out of the inning on two groundouts, the first of which was a comebacker that Garavito intended for a 1-6-3 double play, but Rhett West slid into Berto, who fell onto him, but didn’t break any legs. West however hobbled off with a bum knee that would render him out for a while, one inning after Jay Elder had sprained his wrist and had come out. With Terry Kopp on first base, Ivan Vega had to man second base, a job he was not qualified for. The Titans had run out of infielders; they nominally carried six, but one of them was old and broken David Lessman, who’s body allowed him neither to catch much nor stretch any, hence Kopp at first base.

Portland made up a run in the bottom 5th on a Wall single and Marsingill triple, but then Avakian fanned, having entered the #9 hole when Garavito came into the game, and Berto’s grounder was intercepted by Spataro. No, Berto – you have to hit it at the outfielders on the right - … hmpf. The Titans got the run back in the seventh against Dusty Kulp, who issued a leadoff walk (…) to Spataro (…!!), conceded a single to Young, Spataro went to third, then scored on Vega’s double play grounder. Down 3-1, the Coons did nothing in the bottom of the inning, and Avakian fanned to begin the eighth. Tony Chavez, who was pitching silently but efficiently, then walked Ramos, the first free pass issued by the Titans’ version of Chavez in this game. Stalker singled, and now it looked like an actual chance! Chavez ran out of control against Salgado, walking him to fill the bags. Fowler came up with three aboard, but flew out softly on the first pitch. The runners had to hold, and the Coons had to hit for David Fernandez in Wallace’s vacated spot. Manny Fernandez pinch-hit, but grounded out to the inevitable Spataro, stranding all runners. Wall, Hall, and Zeltser were retired in order by Jermaine Campbell in the ninth. 3-1 Titans. Stalker 2-4; Wallace 1-2;

Where has the goddamn offense gone?? It was supposed to get BETTER! (glance hits Fowler and Avakian)

Don’t lose the fourth game. Don’t lose it. Just don’t.

Begging in April. Gonna be a long season.

Game 4
BOS: 3B Gil – C J. Young – RF M. Avila – LF W. Vega – SS Spataro – 1B Lessman – 2B D’Angelo – CF M. Walker – P Dykstra
POR: SS Stalker – 3B Salgado – LF Wallace – CF Fowler – RF M. Fernandez – 1B Avakian – 2B Barrios – C Wall – P Willes

Nothing worked, just as the last five games, with the offense, who remained completely inane and unwatchable. As was, in fact, Willes. He walked two in the first, with Spataro’s long drive speared by Fowler in deep center, then walked Gil to begin the third inning. Young doubled right away. Avila’s grounder gave Boston a 1-0 lead, and Willes plated the second runner with a wild pitch before serving up a homer to Spataro, who couldn’t resist sticking another knife in the Critters’ belly. Down 3-0, the game looked completely lost. They did occasionally get on base, but not to third base. In the bottom 3rd, a Lessman error and Wallace’s single put two aboard for Fowler, who flew out to center to end the inning. Dykstra walked Avakian and Barrios in the fourth, and Kurt Wall hit into a 5-4-3 soul-cruncher. Even worse, Cristiano seemed to have hid the Capt’n Coma.

Jim Young’s leadoff jack made it 4-0 in the fifth, which was the point where I resigned from competing for much of anything again. Avakian and Barrios walked again with two outs in the sixth, so at least Kurt Wall couldn’t spank the ball into a double play… instead, he popped out on the first pitch. Willes scratched out seven innings in a losing effort before being hit for by Berto to begin the bottom 7th. Berto grounded out, and nobody after him did much better until Bob Zeltser’s pinch-hit double off Tim Zimmerman to kick off the bottom 9th. The team was still down 4-0 and nobody expected them to make a comeback. Scheffer hit for Chris Wise in the #9 hole and whiffed. Stalker grounded out to Spataro. Salgado grounded out to the pitcher… 4-0 Titans. Wallace 2-4; Fowler 2-4; Avakian 1-2, 2 BB; Zeltser (PH) 1-1, 2B;

In other news

April 9 – IND 1B Ivan Pena (.190, 1 HR, 3 RBI) goes yard for the only marker in the Indians’ 1-0 win over the Knights.
April 15 – 2033 CL ROTY, SFB LF/RF/1B Doug Levis (.290, 1 HR, 5 RBI), mercifully ends the Bayhawks game against the Condors with a game-winning sac fly… in the 19th inning. Neither team had scored in extras at that point. In a game with two rain delays that lasted north of eight hours, the most efficient appearance was that of the Bayhawks’ Ben Suhay (.256, 2 HR, 10 RBI), who smoked a pinch-hit grand slam in the seventh inning of the eventual 7-6 San Francisco win.
April 15 – CIN LF/RF Barend Kok (.158, 1 HR, 6 RBI) caps a 5-run rally with a walkoff grand slam as the Cyclones beat the Blue Sox, 7-6.
April 15 – WAS INF/LF Adam Crabb (.276, 0 HR, 4 RBI) is out for the season with a ruptured medial collateral ligament.

Complaints and stuff

It took all of two weeks for me to be fed up with our new star batters. One is in a 2-for-23 slump, and the other is working his hairy bum off to get there, too.

The team scored 14 runs on Monday, and then everything just died. They got eight runs in the other six games. IN TOTAL.

Desolation.

Before we get any ideas, Tony Morales is batting .190 in AAA. It’s only been five games. It’s only been five games. It’s only been –

Rich Vickers is raking .385 with the Alley Cats, but his problem remains the same – everything Rich Vickers does, Tim Stalker does a whole lot better. And when you as a 25-year-old get dominated by a 36-year-old…

And yes, Darren Brown cleared waivers, too (all players waived on Opening Day did), and no, that’s probably not great news. Through 13 innings in AAA, he was walked 10 batters. He’s useless. Maybe I can work him into the lineup, though…

Fun Fact: 14 years ago today, Luis Moreira of the Cyclones churned out six hits in a 15-13 win over the Buffaloes.

Moreira, then a 27-year-old sophomore and reigning Rookie of the Year in the FL, was traded to the Rebels the same year. He hit .278 with 15 homers in total that season and would hit more than 20 a year for a good long time then, all the way through 2027 with the Scorpions. He led the FL in walks that year, drawing 138 of those, and hit .273/.402/.474. He was an All Star for the sixth and final time at age 33, and after that rapidly declined. He was out of baseball three years later. In total he appeared in 1,594 games and hit .264/.383/.429 with 205 homers and 866 RBI. He also drew 1,066 walks.

He will not be on the Hall of Fame ballot for another year, but despite a lofty .811 OPS is not likely to get much support. He only amounted to 1,452 base hits in a career that barely spanned the minimum ten years. He ended up with 10 years and 81 days of ABL service time.