Phoenix Suns (1-3, .250) @ Los Angeles Kings (3-1, .750)
Our final game in Los Angeles will be a repeat performance of the 1st, in that contest, SP Patrick Keith gave the Suns good work and went deep enough in the game that their bullpen should have had little difficulty closing it out. After all, he’d spotted Paul Williams & Johnny Dial 2-runs and left them only 6 outs away from a Game 1 victory. They just couldn’t be bothered to get the job done – in fact if there’s a job to be done for Phoenix in this series it would be better left out of their bullpen’s hands. They’ve been dreadful – just a collection of stiffs out there throwing meatballs, all with an ERA of 9 or higher. They’ll surely get the no-confidence vote in this one from Keith… we expect him to be economical, to give us some balls to hit where he lays on them heavy enough to get us to hit some weak grounders into the teeth of his infield defense before completely powering up that fastball of his. We’ll need to be patient here… give him some long, challenging at-bats, puff up the pitch count a bit, and work to get him out of there as early as possible so we can get another look at the pen. It’ll be easier said than done… a ballplayer’s pride is a funny thing and a little bit of failure never got in the way of any great ballplayers overinflated sense of self.
Game 5: Patrick Keith (0-0, 3.86) @ Newton Weiser (0-0, 27.00)
Win, 4-3. We’ve done the impossible here – or, at least, that’s what it feels like. Coming into this series, the smart money played on Phoenix dispatching us in 6. Smart money, dumb money – I guess it doesn’t really matter now… it’s all just gone money. Newton, on his second run at the Suns in the 2078 postseason, looked a lot better than he did in Game 1 – he gave us 7 innings, allowed 8 hits, 2 earned, doled out 2 free passes, and retired 4 batters on strikes. It wasn’t a legendary performance by any stretch – but it’s what we needed, and it got the job done. Brisky, in full-on hardened steel and sex appeal mode, hurled a 2-inning save, his 3rd of the series, gave up a couple of little dribblers, K’d 3, and, 42 pitches later, helped us lead the celebration while the Phoenix players, head held down, dejected, exited stage left. Offensively, we didn’t exactly come out like gangbusters – we were economical and efficient – a solo shot from Nolan, 2 RBIs for Dick, a run-scoring single from Ethan. Just enough of the good stuff sprinkled in at the most opportune of moments. We now await the winner of the Brooklyn-Pittsburgh series… it’s looking like Brooklyn, but you never know – ol’ Franzone could get hot and take this thing over.
Elsewhere: The Toronto Reds crushed the Chicago Fire in their first-round series… a 4-0 series sweep from the North here. And they earned this one in style, coming back from a 0-4 hole they dug for themselves in the bottom of the 1st to win by a score of 5-4. Ferdinand Loving got the win for Toronto in relief. Meanwhile, the other Canadian club stumbled at home as the Golden State Warriors salvaged some of their self-worth in a 4-1 victory in British Columbia. 2B JJ Barbari drove in two runs during the victory. And, lastly – it looks like we’ll head to Hipster-Land to face the Brooklyn Citizens in the 2nd round of the 2078 playoffs. They were led to victory in the closeout game by Laker castaway’s SP Merl Crawford and 1B Ruben Zarate. I’ll be damned if a couple of my hand-me-downs are going to stop my club from making it to our 4th straight World Series.
Note: Golden State would go on to do the unthinkable and defeat the Vancouver Giants in a thrilling, history-making 7-game, come from behind victory. The last gasp for the cosmic superhero duo of Nacho and Burt has come to an unfortunate end… it was fun while it lasted boy, see you next season!
In other news: Yan Welli gave a good account of herself in making it all the way to the Finals of the Los Angeles County Amateur Golden Foils Tournament. She was, unfortunately, disqualified after being warned for multiple corps-à-corps infractions. You can take the girl out of Judo, but you can’t take the Judo out of the girl… And, lastly – according to my well-placed sources, Ms. Foggy Finkelstein has submitted an application to have her name legally changed to Loretta Synn and, if my information is accurate, plans to pursue a career in Roller Derby. Not sure what her play is here, I mean I hope she has fun, finds herself and all that, but I’m a bit disappointed that her Derby name didn’t get punny with puttanesca. Hasta Bruttanesca? I don’t know… something like that.