[Westheim]

The Critters returned home to find Nick Valdes having grown a beard and standing in front of the ballpark, continuously painting an already pretty white spot next to the entrance while muttering that he had to paint this wall white, so we could have a white team.*

We left him out there.

Raccoons (29-28) vs. Indians (30-24) – June 7-9, 2033

The weeklong homestand began with the Indians coming into town after an off day on Monday. They were in second place and also thanks to the Coons taking the set in Boston had inched to within 3 1/2 games of the Titans, while the Critters were six back at the begin of play. The season series was even at two wins each. Stats hinted at the Indians punching above their weight, with a +3 run differential resulting from wholly average numbers in most categories. They did hit the second-most dingers, however, and couldn’t steal a base for their lives.

Projected matchups:
Andy Palomares (4-5, 4.94 ERA) vs. Andy Bressner (5-3, 3.11 ERA)
Bernie Chavez (7-3, 2.82 ERA) vs. Victor Govea (5-3, 3.84 ERA)
Ignacio del Rio (3-5, 3.94 ERA) vs. John McInerney (5-3, 2.72 ERA)

McInerney remains their only southpaw. There was one significant player on the DL for them, young closer Tim Thweatt being parked with forearm tendinitis that had apparently healed off quick, but now he was trapped on the DL and could not get off until the weekend.

The off day allowed the Coons, who had ended the Boston series with Sabre on the mound, to skip one of their beleaguered veterans. Since Palomares had been *solid* over the last few games and Rico Gutierrez had been fighting not only his ineptitude but also nagging injuries, Gutierrez was skipped to the end of the line.

Game 1
IND: LF Acor – 2B Schneller – CF Baron – C J. Herrera – RF Plunkett – 1B J. Elliott – 3B Czachor – SS Ryu – P Bressner
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Stalker – LF Wallace – 1B Zitzner – CF Hooge – RF M. Fernandez – C Thompson – 3B Perkins – P Palomares

Getting around nailing Dan Schneller with two strikeouts to John Baron (who led Indy with nine homers and a zillion K’s) and Juan Herrera, Palomares got the lead via a Ramos Special in the bottom 1st. Berto singled, stole second, and came around on Jimmy Wallace’s double. That early barrage (…) aside, offense was incredibly slow to begin this series. The Coons got only one more hit through four innings, and Palomares had a 2-hit shutout going through five. Ramos and Stalker did single in the bottom 5th, but Berto was thrown out when Stalker fell asleep in a hit-and-run, and Wallace grounded to Schneller anyway to end the inning, and had the Arrowheads needed two outs, they would have gotten them on that ball, too. Schneller and Herrera would hit singles through the left side in the top 6th to pose a 1-out threat, but then Mike Plunkett hit a sharp bouncer right at Perkins for a comfy 5-4-3 double play. The next inning began with a walk to John Elliott, but the bottom of the order grounded out, struck out whiffing, and struck out looking – that last one was Bressner, not hit for with the tying run in scoring position and two outs. Bottom of the inning, Palomares hit a 1-out single before being forced out on Ramos’ grounder to second. Berto was safe at first though. Stalker doubled to left, but Berto stumbled and could not be sent home, and Wallace was walked intentionally to bring up Zitzner with three on and two outs. Any sort of hit would be extremely great – and the Coons got it! Zitzner singled over the head of Schneller into shallow right-center, and two runs scored to extend the ancient 1-0 lead! Hooge grounded out to end the inning, but it was now 3-0 and the Raccoons would give Palomares at least the chance to complete another inning; on 89 pitches through seven a shutout was however not likely. He struck out Dustin Acor, but then had Schneller double into the corner, and that was it for Palomares; the Critters sent Ed Blair to keep the peace. He struck out Baron, but conceded the run on a Herrera single before getting Plunkett to ground out. The Coons got the run back on Ramos’ single plating Manny Fernandez, who had begun the bottom 8th with a double to center, but ended up stranding three when Wallace grounded out against Juan Melendrez, a southpaw, and that with Noel Ferrero ready to replace Wallace for defense anyway. I was sure hoping that that wasn’t gonna bite us because the Agitator had eyes on this one too… Chris Wise did a fine Josh Boles impression by getting two outs before putting two on in the ninth, Hiroaki Ryu and Alfredo Quintana knocking singles, but then rung up Acor to finish the game. 4-1 Coons! Ramos 3-5, RBI; Stalker 2-4, BB, 2B; Palomares 7.1 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 7 K, W (5-5) and 1-2;

Game 2
IND: LF Acor – 2B Schneller – CF Baron – C J. Herrera – RF Plunkett – 1B J. Elliott – 3B Czachor – SS Ryu – P Govea
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Stalker – LF Wallace – 1B Zitzner – CF Hooge – RF M. Fernandez – C Garcia – 3B Hawkins – P Chavez

The Indians batted through the order in the first, which was a first indicator that Bernie Chavez had yet to attain legit ace status, although bad luck was involved to some degree. Acor opened with a shy 2-strike single, Schneller walked, and Baron hit a bouncer to short, but the Coons took too long to turn two and Baron was safe. Both him and Acor stole a base in the inning, and Juan Herrera hit a 2-run single to get Indy in front. Then Plunkett buried a ball at the base of the batter’s eye to make it 4-0 – that was not rotten luck, that was a hanging 1-0 breaking ball. Elliott and Ryu ALSO got on base, but a K to Govea ended a miserable 39-pitch first inning that right away put this game into the poo column. The Coons got on the board with two outs in the bottom 1st, Wallace doubling and Zitzner singling him in, and then also put Ed Hooge on before Fernandez struck out. The tying run was at the dish again in the second, then with a Hawkins single, Govea misfielding Chavez’ bunt, but Ramos hit into a fielder’s choice and Stalker flew out easily to Acor to end that inning, too.

Chavez kept looking for his good stuff, but never found it. He didn’t last four innings, giving up a solo homer to Acor in the fourth and walking John Baron before being yanked after 3.2 innings of 5-run ball. Nick Bates got out of the inning, then bunted following a 1-out Hawkins single in the bottom 4th. Ramos’ 2-out triple made this a 5-2 game, Walker stalked, and Jimmy Wallace came up as the tying run once more and hit the first pitch into shallow right for an RBI single, getting him to 30 RBI. Zitzner flew out on the very next pitch, stranding the tying runs, but they were on again in the bottom 5th in form of Garcia and Hawkins, then in unearned fashion following a 2-out error by Ryu. Noel Ferrero hit in the #9 hole, got nailed, the lineup turned over, and Berto rushed a ball past a diving Schneller for a 2-out, 2-run single that tied the game! Stalker then flew out to Plunkett, leaving it five-all after five.

The Coons then turned to Kyle Green, which went well for the Indians. Green sucked balls, fell behind every one of the seven hitters he faced, and gave up three walks and two hits, including early on a 2-run bomb to John Baron that yet again put the Coons behind. Anaya would strand three runners by retiring Ryu with two outs. Govea lasted six before making way for left-hander Arnie Terwilliger, who was apparently not related to the Terwilliger Curves on I-5 and refused being rolled down said curves in a barrel, either, shutting the Coons out in the seventh and eighth. It was still a 7-5 game when Lance Legleiter showed up in the bottom 9th, a weird assignment for a team trying to make up 3 1/2 games considering his 5.23 ERA. Hooge popped out, but Manny Fernandez singled, bringing the tying run back to the plate. Elliott Thompson hit for Garcia for the platoon advantage. The 1-1 was wild and moved Fernandez to second, but Legleiter would lose Thompson in a full count anyway, making a 2-for-4 Tom Hawkins the winning run. First pitch, punched to short, to second, to first, ballgame. 7-5 Indians. Ramos 2-5, 3B, 3 RBI; Wallace 4-5, 2B, RBI; Hawkins 2-5; Pinkerton (PH) 1-1;

Game 3
IND: LF Acor – 2B Schneller – CF Baron – C J. Herrera – RF Plunkett – 1B J. Elliott – 3B Czachor – SS Ryu – P McInerney
POR: SS Ramos – 3B Marsingill – 2B Stalker – LF Wallace – 1B Zitzner – RF Ferrero – C Garcia – CF Pinkerton – P del Rio

Both teams had a double play grounder to suck life out of them in the early innings, and then stranded pairs in the third. The Indians brought McInerney with a single and Acor with a double all the way into scoring position before Schneller grounded out to first and Baron popped out. The Coons had Pinkerton and Ramos reach with singles, but Marsingill flew out easily to strand them. Herrera walked and Plunkett singled when his bouncer took a nasty hop over Ramos after hitting the edge between infield grass and dirt, putting two on to begin the fourth inning, but del Rio fought back with an easy fly off Elliott, a K to Ryan Czachor, and Ryu grounding out to Ramos. The ice wouldn’t be broken in this rubber game until the bottom of the fifth inning in which Ferrero and Pinkerton hit doubles up either line, and the Indians had also intentionally walked Fernando Garcia in between with nobody out, which gave the Coons a 1-0 lead and two more runners in scoring position with nobody outs, albeit with the pitcher at the plate. However, they had to pounce here. Just put it in play! Del Rio struck out, which gave another four-fingered salute to Ramos, loading them up and enticing Marsingill to hit it to a middle infielder for two. No such luck – but his fly to left for a sacrifice became also the last Coons run of the inning. Stalker flew out to right to strand a pair in a 2-0 game.

Herrera and Elliott hit singles off del Rio in the sixth, but Czachor got rung up to end the frame. Zitzner hit a 1-out double off the wall in the bottom of the inning. After Ferrero grounded out to move him to third, the Indians walked Garcia with intent, and Pinkerton by accident, bringing up the #9 hole with three aboard and two already disappeared in some trash can. But del Rio was on 96 pitches, making it not the hardest choice to bat for him. Hawkins took the stick – and flew out to Baron. But maybe it would be enough anyway; Garavito and Blair turned in scoreless innings to get through eight. No more offense materialized for Portland, either, leaving the 2-0 lead to Chris Wise in the ninth. Plunkett grounded out to short, Elliott whiffed, and Czachor grounded back to Wise for a rather casual final out in the set. 2-0 Raccoons! Pinkerton 2-3, BB, 2B, RBI; del Rio 6.0 IP, 7 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 5 K, W (4-5);

That was a fine series win! If fewer things go wrong for Bernie in the first on Wednesday, that is a sweep. But it’s okay. Bernie’s still learning.

…which is what I always say about players before suddenly realizing that they’re 28 and will never learn.

Raccoons (31-29) vs. Miners (27-33) – June 10-12, 2033

Also only 3 1/2 games behind in a miserable FL East were the Miners, who were still the team the Raccoons had the best all-time record against, winning games at a .609 rate, and that despite losing the last three interleague meetings with them! We had most recently dropped two of three to them last year and hadn’t won a series since 2027. Pittsburgh was fifth in runs scored in the Federal League, but in the bottom three in runs allowed. Their rotation and bullpen were struggling about equal amounts. They led the league in dingers, but had only seven stolen bases to their name, an even more dramatic split than the Indians had shown.

Projected matchups:
Raffaello Sabre (5-4, 2.95 ERA) vs. Matt Brost (2-2, 3.00 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (3-5, 4.88 ERA) vs. Julio Palomo (4-6, 4.55 ERA)
Andy Palomares (5-5, 4.52 ERA) vs. Jonas Mejia (7-5, 4.48 ERA)

Those would be all right-handers.

Game 1
PIT: 2B McKenzie – CF M. Mendoza – 1B Santillano – 3B Lastrade – LF Palacios – RF Bonaccorsi – C Wall – SS Trawick – P Brost
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Stalker – LF Wallace – 1B Zitzner – CF Hooge – RF M. Fernandez – C Thompson – 3B Perkins – P Sabre

Sabre began Friday with three deep flies to center sandwiching Mario Mendoza’s walk, so we got ready for another not so easy game. The Critters began their day at the plate with a Ramos single to right, then a Stalker double to left, presenting the meat of the order with a fine scoring chance. They sneezed on it, with Wallace popping out at 3-1 and Zitzner hitting into a double play with a liner to Jim McKenzie who doubled off a confused Tim Stalker far off second base, ending the inning. Neither team reached base again until Sabre fumbled Zitzner’s feed to put Mendoza on base to begin the fourth, but Santillano, coming in at .300 with 11 homers and 44 RBI, fed a quick one to Ramos for a double play, and Omar Lastrade flew out to very deep center… they were now just inches from either beating Ed Hooge for extra bases or hitting it over the fence outright…

Bottom 5th, still in a scoreless game, Manny Fernandez hit a double to left-center to get the inning underway. The Miners walked Thompson intentionally to get to Perkins, by now slumped to .208, but the Gold Glover slapped a ball over Jake Trawick for a single, bringing up Sabre with the bags full and nobody out. He popped out to short, but that kept the bags full at least, and when Brost missed with the 3-1 to Ramos, that pushed home Fernandez for the first marker on the scoreboard. Stalker fouled out, Wallace lifted out to Vicente Palacios, and three were left stranded. While Sabre remained undeterred and unmolested except by Mendoza through six, the Miners would lose Brost to injury with one out in the bottom 6th. Replacement Rafael Urbano (a staple of the Indians and Titans in a decade long gone) gave up a double to Fernandez, the first guy he faced. Thompson dished an RBI single to right, but that would be all for the inning, 2-0 through six, and Mendoza struck out to begin the top of the seventh. Santillano reached on a Stalker error, which was a rare enough occurrence to be worth mentioning in any case. That now made for three runners against Sabre, two reaching on errors after the Mendoza walk in the first. Lastrade lined out to Zitzner, and Palacios whiffed to end the inning. But that was as far as the no-hitter would last. Yvon Bonaccorsi opened the eighth with an infield single – again because Zitzner and Sabre couldn’t get together in a convincing manner. Sabre was too slow in convering first base, as simple as that. He however angrily retired the next three batters on five pitches, including a couple of pops over the infield, and kept the 2-0 lead in one piece.

Despite a pinch-hit double by Ferrero in the bottom 8th the Coons failed to tack on a run, but Sabre went back out in the ninth anyway, having thrown only 80 pitches, but the top of the order was up and they were all left-handed batters, so relief was ready in the pen. Jim McKenzie’s leadoff walk was the end for him and the Coons went to Wise, who walked Mendoza before he served up an RBI double to Santillano. That didn’t blow the lead; Lastrade’s groundout to short did, and the go-ahead run was still on second base with one out. With that, Wise was yanked and the Coons went to David Fernandez, but the Miners countered with a pinch-hitter in Luis Leija, who walked. Another right-hander, Pat Green, batted for the damn Bonaccorsi, which sent out Ed Blair. Green popped out, but Kurt Wall hit an RBI single in a full count. Trawick grounded out, stranding two, but the Miners were now in command and sent another ex-Indian, Nick Salinas to see after the Coons in the bottom 9th. Marsingill batted for Perkins and singled, putting the tying run on base. Garcia hit for the unsuccessful Blair, but flew out to center. Ramos slapped a single to the right side, which sent Marsingill all the way to third base. Stalker hit a fly to right, caught by Leija, Marsingill was sent and – was safe! Defeat staved off, here came, with two outs… Preston Pinkerton. Wallace had been removed for defense, when we now needed offense. Berto stole second, but Pinkerton struck out, sending the game to extras. Anaya had a perfect inning in the 10th, and when Zitzner nicked a leadoff single in the bottom of the inning, the Coons called for the bunt with Ferrero. He dropped it between the mound and home, Salinas pounced and fired to second – WILD! All Coons were safe and the winning run was at second base! Fernandez grounded slowly to third base, allowing the runners to move up and Thompson to bat with the win 90 feet away. The Miners went for the double play – Thompson was put on, and Marsingill would bat with the bags full. He sure hit a ball in the direction of Jake Trawick, but the shortstop couldn’t quite reach it, and Marsingill delivered victory with a walkoff single…! 4-3 Coons. Ramos 2-4, BB, RBI; Stalker 2-4, 2B, RBI; Ferrero (PH) 1-1, 2B; Fernandez 2-5, 2 2B; Marsingill (PH) 2-2, RBI; Sabre 8.0 IP, 1 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 3 K;

That was a jolly good game through eight, even through the Bonaccorsi single. Then there was some short-circuiting. At least they pulled out the W. I almost cried, but not quite.

Ed Hooge was sent to St. Petersburg after this game. It was not absolutely his fault, having batted .255/.349/.382, but Adrian Reichardt was ready to return after some warmup games in AAA.

Game 2
PIT: C Wall – SS J. McKenzie – 1B Santillano – 3B Lastrade – LF Trawick – 2B P. Green – RF Palacios – CF Hensley – P Palomo
POR: SS Ramos – CF Reichardt – 2B Stalker – LF Wallace – 1B Zitzner – 3B Marsingill – RF M. Fernandez – C Thompson – P Gutierrez

Shunned earlier in the week, Gutierrez retired the Miners in order in the first before giving up singles to Trawick and Pat Green in the second. Those two then pulled off a double steal, despite their team normally never stealing anything except maybe the show from Raffaello Sabre. After Palacios popped out, the Coons walked Tony Hensley with intent, allowing Gutierrez to get the third out from the pitcher. Santillano hit a deep fly to left in the third inning. One stunning surprise was that it didn’t go out, and the other was that defensive lame duck Jimmy Wallace was actually waiting for it to drop into his glove for the third out there. Bottom 3rd, Portland took the lead in scruffy manner; Thompson walked to begin the inning before Omar Lastrade misfielded Gutierrez’ bunt to put two on with no outs. Ramos grounded out, and Reichardt hit a sac fly to right. Oh, whatever works! Stalker grounded out to end the frame.

To anybody’s surprise, that 1-0 lead was rather resilient despite Rico Gutierrez on the mound. He maintained a 2-hit shutout through five, with Santillano back at the plate in the sixth inning with two outs and nobody on. He hit another deep drive, but again couldn’t get it outta here and this time settled for a double to right. There were certainly worse things a 5-time Player of the Year could do to your skinny lead. Lastrade lined out to Berto to end the inning. The Coons were also not getting anything done offensively and were held to two base hits even through six. That became their undoing. Gutierrez began the seventh with a single hit by Trawick, but he was picked off by Thompson before long. Pat Green however hit a lazy slider over the fence, tying the score at one on Gutierrez’ 93rd pitch of the game. When Josh Keen pinch-hit for Palacios at this point, removing the lefty bat, Gutierrez was yanked immediately. A procession of Bates, David Fernandez, and Anaya kept the Miners from scoring again in regulation, but Palomo came into the bottom 9th still with a 3-hitter and was determined to hold out against the meat of the order, and things didn’t look so bad for him. Stalker flew out to deep left, Wallace grounded out to Green. Only Zitzner was left – but Zitz ended the game, blasting a 378-footer on the first pitch he saw, well over the leftfield fence! 2-1 Critters! Zitzner 1-4, HR, RBI; Marsingill 2-3, 2B; Thompson 1-2, BB; Gutierrez 6.1 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 2 K;

This team has a paw with skinny wins this week…!

I wish they’d put up five in the first and run with it for a change…

Game 3
PIT: C Wall – CF M. Mendoza – 1B Santillano – 3B Lastrade – LF Palacios – RF Bonaccorsi – 2B Hensley – SS Trawick – P Mejia
POR: SS Ramos – CF Reichardt – 2B Stalker – LF Wallace – 1B Zitzner – 3B Marsingill – RF M. Fernandez – C Garcia – P Palomares

Mario Mendoza’s homer put the Miners in the lead right in the first inning, and they would move out to a 2-0 lead on doubles by Santillano and Palacios in the fourth. In between the Raccoons had done precious little and were hitless against the former Condor Mejia. The fourth was the final inning that Palomares finished before being completely torn up in the fifth. Trawick led off with a single, Wall also singled after Mejia popped out at 3-2, and he walked Mendoza, which cleverly led Santillano to the plate with three aboard and only one out. Santillano gave it his best bit for a slam, but fell short in center, and Reichardt also made the catch on the edge of the warning track. It was a sac fly, but if Palomares could retire Lastrade it was still only a 3-0 - … oops, no double to left, two runs scored, and that was it for Palomares, yanked after 4.2 innings and six runs once Palacios doubled home Lastrade off Garavito. It was a 6-0 game and it was also pretty much lost. The Critters didn’t get a hit until the bottom 6th, which Manny Fernandez opened with a gap double, and while he scored on a wild pitch and a Perkins single from the #9 hole, there was little hope the Coons would turn the game around anymore. Which was one reason to bring Kyle Green and see whether he had recovered from his spanking by the Indians. More or less no, with Kurt Wall opening the top 7th with a double into the corner, and Mendoza being offered a walk by the rookie. Santillano hit the ball hard – but right into Marsingill at second base (Perkins had stayed in at third) for a double play, and Lastrade popped out, letting Green get away with having little to offer in terms of stuff or resilience.

And then it did get interesting. Mejia was still around in the eighth, which he began with a walk to Fernando Garcia. Perkins hit another single, Ramos drew another walk, and suddenly there were three aboard, nobody out, and the tying run was in the on-deck circle. It was station-to-station when Adrian Reichardt singled into shallow center, cutting the gap to 6-2. Stalker had been removed earlier when Perkins had stayed in the game, and Kyle Green was in the #3 spot. Elliott Thompson batted for him, but was held to sac fly. Wallace flew out uselessly, while Zitzner’s drive to left fell short of the wall, but for an RBI double. The tying runs were in scoring position with two gone, but Marsingill grounded a 1-2 pitch to Trawick to end the inning. Nick Bates would keep the Miners at bay in the ninth, but the bottom of the order was not able to stir enough trouble against Salinas in the bottom of the inning… 6-4 Miners. Perkins (PH) 3-3, RBI; Green 2.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 1 BB, 0 K;

In other news

June 7 – CHA LF/RF Dave Trahan (.259, 5 HR, 26 RBI) lands three hits and plates five runs in the Falcons’ 13-3 rout of the Bayhawks.
June 8 – SAL INF/RF Jose Castro (.299, 3 HR, 27 RBI) has five hits and drives in one run as the Wolves down the Gold Sox, 15-4.
June 8 – The visiting Knights take the lead twice in extra innings, but blow it both times before being defeated, 7-6 in 12 innings, by Tijuana’s SP/MR Ethan Jordan (2-0, 3.20 ERA, 2 SV) – with the bench depleted – dropping in a walkoff single against ATL MR Drew Johnson (1-4, 6.49 ERA).
June 8 – Ulnar nerve irritation renders NAS CL J.D. Ryerson (4-2, 4.60 ERA, 12 SV) out for the season.
June 9 – RIC 3B/SS Guillermo Obando (.302, 2 HR, 18 RBI) is out for the rest of the month with a strained hamstring.
June 11 – DAL INF Jon Ramos (.324, 1 HR, 22 RBI) scorches the Loggers for six hits in a 18-4 blowout. All but one of his hits are singles, the exception being a fifth-inning triple. He drives in two runs. He is the fifth Star to collect six hits in a game after Gabriel Cruz (1983), Darrel Tracy (2000), Hector Garcia (2008), and Hugo Mendoza (2015).
June 11 – Season over also for CHA SP Aaron Lewis (6-3, 3.35 ERA), diagnosed with a torn labrum.
June 11 – TIJ RF/LF/1B Willie Ojeda (.294, 3 HR; 30 RBI) is on crutches with a broken foot and will miss about a month.

Complaints and stuff

There was good things and bad things this week; good things, we won four games and lost only two. Bad things, there is no such thing as a comfortable win with this team.

We are also within just three games of foundering Titans (3-8 in June). I don’t know whether that will make me do stupid things at the deadline…

Next week: Oregon Brawl down I-5 in Salem, then the draft, then a 3-game set at home with the damn Elks.

Fun Fact: With the Stars getting their fifth-ever 6-hit game this week through Jon Ramos, only the Loggers and Raccoons have had a player dish out six hits more often in league history.

That would be six times each, including the Raccoons’ Freddy Lopez in 1977 and Jorge Salazar in 1994 doing the honors to the Loggers. No Logger has ever collected six hits against the Raccoons, and no Logger has done so at all since Todd Moultrie dropped in six against the Aces on May 30, 2010.

*And that is the only homage Max Frisch will ever get in this story.