[Westheim]

Raccoons (51-32) vs. Crusaders (45-36) – July 5-8, 2027

Next up for the Raccoons and their perpetually foundering offense were their four-and-four playmates for this season as the All Star break approached. The Crusaders were already almost double digits out in the CL North despite leading the Continental League in runs scored and batting average and a few other offensive categories. They did have serious pitching woes, though. They were conceding the fourth-most runs overall, and their rotation was getting wrecked to the tune of a 4.47 ERA, second-worst in the 2027 low-offense CL. The Raccoons were 3-1 on them this season.

Projected matchups:
Dan Delgadillo (4-6, 3.27 ERA) vs. Doug Moffatt (8-5, 4.55 ERA)
TBD vs. Chris Klein (10-4, 3.25 ERA)
Rin Nomura (10-3, 2.90 ERA) vs. Carlos Marron (5-2, 3.43 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (4-8, 3.78 ERA) vs. Eddie Cannon (5-5, 4.75 ERA)

All righties for New York, while the Critters were as of yet none the smarter about who would fill in on Tuesday, although Kevin Surginer (2-0, 2.06 ERA) remained a valid option as long as Dan Delgadillo didn't press him into service with a ****ty Monday outing.

Game 1
NYC: LF Espinosa – 3B Walter – RF Ellis – C Asay – 1B Godown – 2B Kane – CF N. Ayala – SS S. Valdez – P Moffatt
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – C Tovias – 3B Nunley – 2B Rock – P Delgadillo

Let alone our squeezed pitching situation for a second, the weather also attempted to be a factor in this game as it started to drizzle more or less right after Delgadillo's first pitches, which Juan Espinosa and Shane Walter hit for singles to go to the corners, with Nate Ellis' double play grounder plating Espinosa for a quickie 1-0 lead for the Crusaders, and it would rain on and off throughout the game. The Coons had Ramos on base in the first, but stranded him after he stole his 29th bag, then brought up Nunley with a 2-out single in the bottom 2nd. Trey Rock pushed a grounder through Justin Godown for a double, but pulled up lame at second base and had to be replaced by Tim Stalker before Delgadillo being rung up by Doug Moffatt concluded the inning with a pair stranded in scoring position. Yusneldan was also struck out to strand a pair in the bottom 4th, but at least Tim Stalker had brought in the tying run with a groundout just before that. The inning had started with a Harenberg double; weirdly he only seemed to be able to do anything at all if nobody was on base these days, as his 35 RBI this year could attest to. He struck out to end the bottom 5th with Rafael Gomez on first base after a 2-out single, too.

Delgadillo was not convincing anybody, relying on the defense to drag him through innings. Through six he struck out nobody at all while walking three and running up 103 pitches. He walked Godown with two outs in the top 6th, then was only bailed out when Mike Kane's drive to deep left was caught by Jarod Spencer while he bounced off the fence out there, but survived the ordeal without crippling injuries. Bottom 6th, Moffatt walked Mora and Tovias to begin the inning, but these were not the dastardly disturbing Raccoons for no reason at all. Nunley and Stalker BOTH fouled out behind home plate, and when Cookie batted for Delgadillo, he grounded out to the mound…

Not that the Crusaders were much better. Kearney put PH's Jose Gutierrez and Felipe Delgado to begin the top 7th, but then Moffatt bunted into a double play. After Kearney walked Espinosa in a distracting appearance, Ricky Ohl secured the third out from PH Nick Shaffer. Things only got more wicked from there; Ramos got on base on the Crusaders' error for the second time in the bottom 7th – this time Kane being the culprit – but was again blindingly left stranded. Ricky Ohl continued the dirty work in the top of the eighth, struck out Nate Ellis for the first Coons K on the day, but then Jason Asay singled, after which the rain got so bad that the umpires had to call a rain delay that lasted the rest of the evening and ended up suspending the game to Tuesday.

At this point, the Raccoons were *really* in the ****. We had an incomplete game to complete (probably in extras the way I know the little ****s), THEN probably pitch a complete game starting with Surginer? By then, the Titans had also won and put us five games out, so why even worry anymore?

Game 1 (resumed)
NYC: LF Espinosa – CF Shaffer – RF Ellis – C Asay – 1B Godown – 2B Kane – 3B Vacarri – SS F. Delgado – P Moffatt
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – C Tovias – 3B Nunley – 2B Stalker – P Ohl

Play resumed with a pitching change as the Coons sent Josh Boles to actually resume tossing here, which didn't get the damn Coons anywhere. Boles yielded a single up the middle to Godown on an 0-2 pitch, Asay went for third base, and Abel Mora's throwing error allowed him to score. And that was really the game. The Raccoons put Mora and Stalker on base in the bottom 8th, then saw Greg Borg strike out to strand them in his first plate appearance of the season, and Travis Giordano retired the 1-2-3 batters in that order in the ninth. 2-1 Crusaders. Mora 2-3, BB; Rock 1-1, 2B;

With the bullpen now shackled, too, the Coons had to pull Surginer out of the Tuesday start. Rin Nomura was sent on short rest instead.

Game 2
NYC: 2B J. Gutierrez – C F. Delgado – RF N. Ellis – 1B Godown – 3B Kane – CF Shaffer – LF N. Ayala – SS Vacarri – P Klein
POR: SS Ramos – LF Carmona – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – 3B Nunley – 2B Spencer – C Rocha – P Nomura

This was the major league debut for Daniel Rocha, a catcher nobody had talked about even six weeks ago. His first plate appearance occurred with the Coons up 1-0 thanks to Abel Mora's leadoff jack in the bottom 2nd and had Spencer on first base after Jarod's single. Rocha grounded out to Mike Kane, but that allowed Spencer to move to second base, from where he scored when Rin Nomura cracked a single to shallow center, extending the lead to 2-0. The Crusaders responded by making two outs at third base in the third inning; Giacobbe Vacarri hit a 1-out double to left, then was caught stealing, and then Chris Klein hit a gapper to right-center which would have been good for a double, but displaying a lack of awareness he tried to get to third base, where then Nunley already waited with the ball to tag him out easily. Nomura then hung on to the 2-0 lead with great stubbornness (he was just better with small leads…) while the Coons flailed aimlessly for a few innings, right up until Nomura opened the bottom 5th with a single to left. Klein walked Ramos, then lost Cookie on a single. Three on, no outs, middle of the order approaching. Go get a drink now and spare yourself the agony. Rafael Gomez drove in a run on a bloop single before Harenberg grounded hard to first base, Godown firing home to cull Ramos at the plate. Mora flew out to Ayala in left, but that allowed Cookie to scamper home, 4-0 on the sac fly. Nunley struck out.

Nomura lasted seven innings, which in itself was already a success on short rest, and also remained unscored upon, which was even dandier. And tension was high in the seventh inning, with Godown reaching base with a 1-out single before Nomura lost Shaffer in a full count for his second walk in the game. Nelson Ayala was likely his final batter one way or another, and Nomura reached back once more and managed to get in a 3-2 changeup that seemed to freeze in mid-air and completely threw Ayala's timing off. He flailed himself out to end the inning. Nomura hung around to retire Vacarri in the eighth, but then was replaced by Surginer, who entered in a double switch that also exchanged Mora in center for Greg Borg, but got stuck against Gutierrez (single) and Delgado (double) that put 2-out pressure on Portland. Billy Brotman replaced him against Ellis, whom he struck out. Billy hung around for the save despite a leadoff double hit by Godown in the ninth and Ayala driving him in with a 2-out single. Vacarri struck out to end the game. 4-1 Coons. Ramos 1-2, 2 BB; Nomura 7.1 IP, 5 H, 0 R, 2 BB, 3 K, W (11-3) and 2-3, RBI; Brotman 1.1 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, SV (1);

Daniel Rocha hit a double off the fence in rightfield in the sixth inning for his first major league base hit, but was left stranded.

Game 3
NYC: LF Espinosa – CF Hatley – RF Ellis – C Asay – 1B Godown – 2B Kane – 3B Walter – SS S. Valdez – P Marron
POR: SS Ramos – LF Carmona – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – C Tovias – 2B Spencer – 3B Nunley – P James

James struck out his first ABL batter of the season, Espinosa, which was as close to a good outing a she would come. The Crusaders hit him all over the place, including doubles by Godown and twice-a-Coon Shane Walter in the second inning for their first run. They added an unearned run in the third on a Tovias throwing error, but Nick Hatley also romped a 2-run homer with nobody out in the fifth after Espinosa's leadoff single. That was already the ninth base hit off James, who couldn't help himself and also got no help from the rest of the team; Carlos Marron threw a 2-hitter through six innings, and no Raccoon had touched third base by the time their bullpen got involved after Tim Stalker had fouled out in James' spot in the bottom 6th. Tovias would hit a 1-out single in the bottom 7th, moving Mora to second base after Abel's walk earlier, and a normal team would consider two on, one out when down by four runs a remote chance, but these Coons only saw the cheap glory of hitting into another double play. Jarod Spencer grounded to short, and it was only a slight bobble by Kane on Sergio Valdez' feed that kept the Crusaders from turning two. Nunley then flew out to Hatley in center.

Nope, this had all the signs of a lame-ass loss. Bullock struck out batting for Brotman to begin the bottom 8th before Ramos walked and Cookie singled. They pulled off a double steal, then scored on Gomez' single to left. Suddenly it was an actual ballgame, except that the Crusaders sent Ben Marx to replace Marron and Harenberg struck out willingly. Mora was up with two outs, when an errant pickoff throw sent Gomez to second base, Mora singled to left-center, Gomez scored and pulled a throw that allowed Mora to move up to second base, from where he scored on Tovias' single. Tied ballgame! What just happened!!?? Spencer grounded out to end the inning, but suddenly it was 4-4 on the board! Please curb your enthusiasm though – they were not likely to score again this week after this sudden outburst. For now, Jonathan Snyder survived a double by 42-year-old Jose Gutierrez in the top 9th to give the team a walkoff chance after all, but the team couldn't piece anything together in the bottom 9th against Marx, who walked Bullock with a one out, but that didn't amount to a run before time ran out. Reason enough to gnash teeth was that Bullock was also the very next Raccoon to reach base again in the game, and then because Travis Giordano drilled him leading off the bottom 12th. On the bright side, the Coons' Snyder and Boles had held up this far, and now Ramos grounded through Gutierrez, who finally showed his age and gave the Coons a potentially game-winning single that sent Bullock to third base. With nobody out even! Cookie grounded to Gutierrez in that situation, Gutierrez had to go home, and fast – and dropped the ball. Walkoff error! 5-4 Blighters! Gomez 2-5, 2 RBI; Tovias 3-4, BB, RBI; Snyder 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K; Boles 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K, W (5-2);

Fewer 12-inning games would be great, though…

For now the Druid reported that Trey Rock's knee showed no structural damage but was still sore and that he would only be ready again after the All Star Game and a few wraps with the Druid's world-infamous snake gut ointment.

It doesn't sound half as bad as it looks. And it doesn't look even a quarter as bad as it smel- (heave!)

Game 4
NYC: 2B J. Gutierrez – C F. Delgado – RF Ellis – CF Hatley – 1B Godown – 3B Kane – LF Shaffer – SS Vacarri – P E. Cannon
POR: SS Ramos – LF Carmona – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – C Tovias – 2B Stalker – 3B Bullock – P Gutierrez

Rico pitched his heart out, striking out four in the first three innings while requiring divine intervention only once when Gomez shagged – somehow – Felipe Delgado's drive deep into the right-center gap. Ellis and Godown hit soft singles off him in the fourth, but Kane grounded into an inning-ending double play. The bottom of that inning also saw vague movement by the Coons for the first time, even in the most subtle of ways. Harenberg drew a 1-out walk, Mora hit an infield single. After Tovias grounded out to advance the runners, Tim Stalker was walked intentionally to get .180 slugfest king Daniel Bullock involved with three on and two outs, which ended with a sad grounder to Godown. The Crusaders' own sub-.200 infielder then put them up 1-0 in the fifth on Vacarri's solo shot to right. Delgado and Gomez exchanged leadoff jacks in the fifth inning to bring the score to 2-1 in favor of the wrong team, but the Critters followed that up with Harenberg and Mora both singling off Cannon to bring the go-ahead run on base. Cannon hung two strikes on Elias Tovias, before hanging what was supposed to be third one, right in the wheelhouse. Deep to right – ELIAS! MATIAS! TOVIAS! DIAZ! THREE-RUN HOMER!!

After this ecstatic moment, the Coons put Stalker on base, he stole second, but ultimately ended up stranded. Rico battled through the seventh, striking out ancient Gutierrez (who I can't tell often enough was a Raccoon when Clyde Brady was a Raccoon…!) with the tying runs aboard to protect his 4-2 lead. Everybody wanted him that win so badly after a 4-8 first half, and the Coons chipped singles off Steve Casey in the bottom 7th to tack on. Gomez singled, Mora singled, Tovias singled to extend the lead to 5-2. But Rico ran out of steam in the eighth; Delgado singled, and Hatley walked with one out, bringing up Godown again. Kearney replaced him despite my lefty-for-lefty aversion and got out of the jam with an easy F9 from Godown, then a K hung on Mike Kane. Bottom 8th, Bullock walked against Casey to begin the inning, stole second, Jarod Spencer singled up the middle, then stole second. Runners in scoring position with no outs, the Crusaders shrugged Ramos aboard to try their luck with an 0-for-4 Cookie, who grounded into a force at home, and then Gomez grounded into a double play. Nobody scored… and did I hear the bells of doom tolling in the distance? Top 9th, Nick Shaffer was thrown out trying to bunt his way on against Snyder before Vacarri homered to center. What?? Ayala flew out to right, but then Gutierrez and Walter chucked 2-out singles, bringing up the tying run in Nate Ellis and his 12 homers. The count ran full, Ellis took a big hack – and popped out to short. 5-3 Critters. Gomez 3-5, HR, RBI; Mora 3-4; Tovias 2-4, HR, 4 RBI; Stalker 1-2, BB; Spencer (PH) 1-1; Gutierrez 7.1 IP, 8 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 7 K, W (5-8);

Raccoons (54-33) vs. Canadiens (43-42) – July 9-11, 2027

The Elks sported the second-best offense in the league at this point, but like the Crusaders rotted in the bottom quarter in terms of runs allowed. They had the second-most runs conceded right now, giving them a meager +2 run differential (Coons: +86), but they still held a 5-4 edge over us in the season series.

Projected matchups:
Mark Roberts (8-2, 2.74 ERA) vs. Joe Martin (0-0)
Dan Delgadillo (4-6, 3.16 ERA) vs. Ernesto Lozano (2-7, 4.59 ERA)
Rin Nomura (11-3, 2.71 ERA) vs. Antonio Muniz (8-5, 4.44 ERA)

Two more right-handers before we'd get the southpaw "Furball"(??) Muniz on Sunday. Since Nomura might make the All Star Game I was looking at options to not have him pitch on Sunday, but that would once more involve having somebody go on short rest… or Kevin Surginer.

Joe Martin would make his first major league start. The 23-year-old from Chicago was the #44 pick in the 2023 draft and had made one appearance last year when he had surrendered four runs in one inning in relief. No offense to the Coons, but they would probably allow him to get his 36.00 career ERA down significantly in this outing.

Game 1
VAN: RF Wojnarowski – 3B Crosby – LF A. Torres – 2B Gura – 1B Myles – C M. Sanchez – CF Day – SS R. Walsh – P J. Martin
POR: SS Ramos – LF Carmona – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – C Tovias – 2B Spencer – 3B Nunley – P Roberts

The Raccoons' season ended in the first inning with Alberto Ramos leaving the game with a strained oblique, Bullock replacing him. Ramos had knocked a leadoff double as he fell by the wayside, the first of three doubles in the inning (Cookie, Harenberg) as the Critters took an early 2-0 lead. But, oh, for what price!? The home crowd was stunned to see this development occur, and so was I. I was so stunned I couldn't even reach for the liquor until like the fourth inning.

At that point and beyond, Mark Roberts was shutting out the Elks, but the Raccoons didn't tack onto their early lead, and didn't even get close to another run while Roberts was 3-hitting the damn Elks through five innings with seven strikeouts to his ledger. All of this and more was undone in the sixth inning; Adrian Crosby opened it with a soft single to left, and Roberts got Alex Torres to strike out before surrendering back-to-back blinding bombs to dismal Ted Gura and Adan Myles, falling 3-2 behind in the process. And whoever hoped for something of a reaction from the Raccoons would be sorely disappointed. They did not get another base hit against Martin through eight innings (and had only gotten two in total after the 3-double first inning), then faced right-hander Sean Carlsen and his 5+ ERA in the bottom 9th. That was curious choice even for a team with pitching problems. But did it harm them? Of course it didn't. Harenberg grounded out to short, ****tily, Mora flew out to left, and Tovias was rung up. 3-2 Canadiens. Ramos 1-1, 2B; Carmona 2-3, BB, 2B, RBI;

Along with Alberto Ramos being buried on the DL after this game, the Raccoons' season was buried with him. There was no spark left in that failure-trodden lineup.

Juan Magallanes was called up from AAA.

Game 2
VAN: RF Wojnarowski – 1B Day – CF Coca – LF A. Torres – C R. Ortíz – SS Byrd – 3B Crosby – 2B Gura – P Lozano
POR: LF Carmona – SS Stalker – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – 2B Spencer – 3B Nunley – C Rocha – P Delgadillo

Through three, Delgadillo yielded a Torres single, but struck out four, while also watching his team being no-hit by Ernesto Lozano. The Elks got on the board in the fourth inning thanks to Norman Day lobbing a leadoff single, swiping second base on the rookie Rocha, and then racing for home on a single by Ricky Ortíz that eluded Tim Stalker up the middle. Ted Gura hit a 1-out double the following inning, went for home on Brian Wojnarowski's single to center, but was thrown out to end the inning by Abel Mora.

Meanwhile the Coons' offensive ambitions were entirely limited to whatever the Elks did wrong. Lozano lapsed Gomez and Harenberg on base with 2-out walks in the bottom 1st, but Mora grounded out to Day. They didn't get another runner until Nunley reached on Day's error in the fifth inning, but Rocha hit into a double play to do away with that one, and then John Byrd threw away Delgadillo's grounder for a 2-base error at the start of the sixth inning, which was technically a splendid chance for a normally abled team. These Raccoons, however… popped out, grounded out, and popped out. The home crowd booed slightly in the seventh inning, a bit more in the eighth, at least until Greg Borg rolled a pinch-hit single past a lunging Byrd for a 2-out base knock that broke up Lozano's bid with four outs left to collect. That didn't make them winners, though. Cookie grounded out pathetically, and with Carlsen taking over they were sat down 1-2-3 in the ninth. 1-0 Canadiens. Borg (PH) 1-1; Delgadillo 7.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 6 K, L (4-7);

[INCOHERENT SCREAMING WITH VAGUE THREATS MIXED IN]

For the Sunday game, the bench got even shorter, with Cookie Carmona being in diffuse pain and unable to play. Oh jolly, baseball gods – always keep 'em coming!

Game 3
VAN: 3B Crosby – 1B Day – CF Coca – LF A. Torres – C R. Ortíz – 2B Byrd – RF C. Mendoza – 2B Gura – P A. Muniz
POR: SS Stalker – 2B Spencer – 1B Mora – RF Gomez – C Tovias – CF Borg – LF Magallanes – 3B Nunley – P James

With Rin Nomura winning an All Star nomination, the Coons scratched him from the Sunday game and sent George James, who had thrown 81 pitches on Wednesday, on short rest instead. The first results of this were terrific… for the damn Elks. Crosby and Day lashed singles, and Alex Torres' double allowed them to score two runs in the first inning, one immediately, and one after Ortíz grounded out to Spencer. The Coons left them loaded in the bottom 1st, which Stalker opened with a double, then put Magallanes (single) and Nunley (Gura error) on base to begin the bottom 2nd. James bunted them over. The tying runs scored … albeit on a groundout and a wild pitch. The mileage of your confidence might vary.

And the error parade continued; Abel Mora grounded poorly to begin the third inning, but Ortíz threw the roller past the reaching Day, awarding the go-ahead run second base with nobody out in the bottom 3rd. And it also scored! After a Gomez single moved Mora to third, he came home when Tovias drilled a bouncer into a 6-4-3 double play. And I had no more pills to swirl into my martini. While James held of collapse for now, the Coons put them on the corners with singles by Magallanes and Nunley in the bottom 4th, with nobody out. No way we'd hit for James anyway, but he'd also not bunt, but rather … strike out looking. Stalker walking on four pitches made all that relative anyway, and the bases were loaded for Jarod Spencer, who was batting .249 and falling, and grounded right in the next double play. GODDAMNIT!!! Nope, the stupid ****s would hit into another double play the following inning, Tovias 6-4-3 to erase Gomez' single, and that after Mora had erased his own single when he was caught stealing.

Accordingly, the Elks tore James to shreds in the sixth, three singles with one out by Torres, Ortíz, and Byrd to tie the game, and then a walk to Chris Mendoza loaded the bases. Ricky Ohl replaced the swamped starter and struck out both Gura and Muniz to end the inning, but GOOD LORD, what were they even DOING??? Bottom 6th, Magallanes with another 1-out single, then a walk drawn by Nunley. Harenberg batted for Ohl, coming off a bench otherwise containing only the two Daniels, and – LO AND BEHOLD – he came through with a single to right that sent Magallanes around to score. HALLELUJAH. Then Stalker and Spencer were going to strand Nunley on third base with soft fly outs to Chris Mendoza… except that Mendoza dropped Spencer's ball for a run-scoring error. What an assembly of two teams, only intent on soiling somebody's well-mown lawn …! The inning ended with a Mora strikeout, and the following inning saw Tovias with his third double play grounder of the game, and Nunley chucked a ball to Byrd for a double play in the eighth. They were actually trying to kill me – the only logical explanation at this point. At least Kearney and McLin handled the 5-3 lead without breaking it, and handed it off to Snyder in the ninth inning, who had nothing better to do than allowing a leadoff single to Mendoza. Ted Gura singled, sending Mendoza to third, and when Adan Myles flew to center, Borg dropped that ball. Mendoza scored, tying run at third base, go-ahead run on second base. Nobody out. And nobody was made out by Snyder, either, who walked Crosby, then faced PH Manny Sanchez with the bags full and surrendered a long, long, long, long slam to left. Snyder was hauled in and kicked down the stairs to the tunnel between dugout and clubhouse, leaving the game to Surginer, who extracted the team from the ninth. Bottom 9th. J.R.Hreha allowed a leadoff single to Jarod Spencer as I watched numbly. Mora grounded out. Gomez, unretired, walked onto the open base. Which brought up Tovias with a chance for a fourth double play in this game, and Rocha had already batted, so nobody could bat for Tovias. Four double plays had to be a league record for a single stupid player! And he couldn't even do THAT correctly, flying out to Torres. Borg flew out to Coca. 8-5 Canadiens. Gomez 4-4, BB; Magallanes 3-3, BB; Harenberg (PH) 1-1, RBI;

Destroyed. Everything shattered and… Destroyed.

In other news

July 5 – The Scorpions pick up INF/RF John Calfee (.188, 12 HR, 32 RBI) from the Canadiens along with a prospect, sending INF John Byrd (.282, 1 HR, 17 RBI) to Vancouver. The Canadiens also pick up SP Ben Jacobson (4-3, 3.18 ERA) from the Loggers, who in turn receive a prospect from Vancouver.
July 6 – TOP SP Nick Danieley (10-6, 3.57 ERA) 2-hits the Capitals in a 3-0 shutout.
July 6 – DEN SP Ian Prevost (6-7, 3.56 ERA) doesn't even last two innings in his first Gold Sox start before twisting an ankle. He is expected to miss the rest of the month.
July 8 – Loggers INF Mike Green (.212, 8 HR, 28 RBI) is lost for the season with a torn Achilles tendon.
July 8 – OCT C Mike Pizzo (.271, 2 HR, 10 RBI) is traded to the Rebels for LF/RF Alfredo Quintana (.270, 3 HR, 13 RBI).
July 10 – The Crusaders pick up 2B/SS Zheng-ze Ts'ai (.280, 5 HR, 39 RBI) from the Stars in exchange for two prospects.
July 10 – Knights' LF/RF Johnny Stuckey (.244, 1 HR, 13 RBI) is traded to the Rebels for INF Ruben Pelles (.211, 3 HR, 16 RBI).
July 11 – RIC SP Fernando Estrada (5-5, 4.39 ERA) is done for the season after suffering radial nerve compression.
July 11 – DEN SP Ernesto Lujan (6-7, 3.89 ERA) is also lost for the year with a torn back muscle.

Complaints and stuff

From stabs in the back to kicks in the guts to punches on the nose. Let's dissect this one by one. We expect Alberto Ramos to be back somewhere around the middle of August, at which point this lame-ass team will probably be nine games out and will be on a 74-inning scoreless streak.

Then there is the curious case of Cookie Carmona, who is 35 years old, but according to the Druid has the body of a 70-year-old man. He dragged himself through the season so far, but starting four games in a row this week mostly crippled him and the Druid has now diagnosed him with *gout*, which is not something he is expected to shake off any time soon. We'll see how he is after the All Star break, but the Druid recommends giving him a walker for assistance in the field, and will also change his diet to mostly herbs and roots, ostensibly to kill him?

For no reason at all, the Raccoons would send six All Stars for the Tuesday game, although a sizable portion were relief pitchers… Rin Nomura, Josh Boles, Ricky Ohl, Billy Brotman, Rafael Gomez, and Kevin Harenberg (!!?) all got tabbed. It was the first such nomination for all the pitchers minus Ohl, who made the second exhibition of his career along with Gomez. Harenberg got the third nod.

Note that Jonathan Snyder, unlike Kevin Harenberg, did not get a fake All Star nomination. When Ricky Ohl comes back, he will be the new closer, and Snyder can consider himself lucky if I can find a ****ty team to trade him to rather than pulling out all of his whiskers one by one without sedation for either him or me!!

This is the low point, right? They can't get any more atrocious, right?

Ah. All that remains is booze.

Fun Fact: Poignantly, Joe Martin's first career outing (1 IP, 4 ER) occurred on September 30, 2026 in the 14-1 rout by which the Raccoons clinched the CL North in Vancouver.

Ramos and Spencer hit singles, Matt Jamieson hit a 2-run double, and Nunley, Terry Kopp, and Brett O'Dell all chipped in singles to run up the 4-run tally.

Happier times.