[Westheim]

Raccoons (41-23) @ Miners (39-24) – June 15-17, 2027

Too pretty decent teams were up against another in this interleague series, and the Miners even sported a 7-game winning streak we were keen on ending. They ranked second in runs scored in the Federal League as well as first in conceding runs, so here was a team that looked like a good bid for the playoffs. Their run differential was approaching +100 in June, too, with a +92 tally heading into the series with the Raccoons. Both teams had already played against another last season, when the Raccoons lost two of three games. The Coons's most recent series win against them stemmed from the 2022 season.

Projected matchups:
Kyle Anderson (7-2, 2.76 ERA) vs. Josh Walsh (7-1, 2.84 ERA)
Rin Nomura (7-3, 3.25 ERA) vs. Bobby Morris (5-5, 3.99 ERA)
Rico Gutierrez (4-6, 3.32 ERA) vs. Matt Brost (4-4, 3.11 ERA)

Three right-handers on offer, but remember they also had Monday off and could bring left-hander Ramiro Benavides (8-2, 2.58 ERA) into the series without much effort.

Game 1
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – C Tovias – 3B Nunley – 2B Rock – P Anderson
PIT: LF J. Lopez – RF O. Alfaro – C Henley – CF de la Riva – 1B Santillano – 3B Czachor – SS Tyer – 2B Becker – P J. Walsh

The Raccoons refused to be inspired by one of the ABL's best offenses (even with Omar Alfaro included). Alberto Ramos had their first two hits in the game, a pair of singles, stole one base, and scored a total of never. By contrast, the Coons' Kyle Anderson got shackled early and shackled a lot, surrendering plenty of runners and runs alike. Danny Santillano hit a 2-out, 2-run double in the bottom 1st, and former Falcon Ryan Czachor added two more runs with a 2-out homer in the bottom of the third inning. Preceding the bomb, .360 batter Santillano had ripped another double. Santillano then drew the 1-out walk in the bottom 5th that knocked Anderson from the game with J.J. Henley (walk) and Carlos de la Riva (single) already on the base paths. Henley, as slow-footed as they made catchers, tagged and went for home when Czachor hit a fly to right off Dan McLin, but was thrown out by Rafael Gomez to end the inning. Like that mattered anything in this game, in which the Raccoons made it to the eighth inning without landing another base hit against Josh Walsh, who issued walks to Harenberg and Nunley in the fourth inning to get into some mild discomfort, but nowhere near trouble, and otherwise stood unassailable. When the Coons did get their third base hit of the dismal night, it was Ramos again, a leadoff triple to left-center. He barely scored on three ****ty groundouts by Spencer, Gomez, and Harenberg, in order. What a rally! … instantly undone by back-to-back doubles fired by Santillano and Czachor against Kevin Surginer in the bottom 8th. 5-1 Miners. Ramos 3-4, 3B; McLin 1.2 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K;

Game 2
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Spencer – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – C Tovias – LF Carmona – 3B Nunley – CF Hollingsworth – P Nomura
PIT: LF J. Lopez – SS Tyer – C Henley – CF de la Riva – 1B Santillano – 3B Czachor – RF B. Ortega – 2B Becker – P Brost

Bobby Morris was nowhere in sight, and Matt Brost was moved up into this game, so it was not unrealistic to expect Benavides on Thursday, although at this point did it even matter which pitcher they were facing? The offense was stale like old arse, and no improvement could be made out on the horizon even when one squinted mightily. Case in point, Ramos was retired to begin the game, meaning three innings without runs for sure for the Coons, who then put Spencer (walk) and Gomez (single) on base, only for Kevin Duncenberg to expertly ground into a 6-4-3 double play. Rin Nomura allowed a 2-spot in the opening inning just like Anderson had done the night before. Jorge Lopez drew a leadoff walk, went to third on Brian Tyer's sharp single to center, then scored on de la Riva's single. Santillano also singled, loading them up, and the second run scored on Czachor's grounder to Matt Nunley, who tapped third base, but couldn't kill off Czachor at first base anymore after that.

There was a Cookie double in the second inning that only produced a sad aftermath, and Spencer was also stranded in scoring position in the third. The fourth inning saw Cookie single, Nunley double, and Hollingsworth be walked intentionally with one down. Nomura popped out for not a whole lot of surprise, but Ramos still batted with three on and two outs, and maybe a gapper could save the Critters here. No gapper occurred, but Brost also didn't occur in the strike zone right now and lost Alberto to a bases-loaded walk, which shortened the gap to 2-1 for Spencer, who impatiently flew out to Jorge Lopez. It wasn't until the fifth inning that the Critters got even, then on a Tovias homer, his tenth of the season.

Brost looked tired by the sixth inning, which was certainly what five walks and numerous long counts could do to a pitcher, but the Raccoons failed to topple him before the Miners went to former starter Dan Lambert with two outs. Lambert retired Spencer after Ramos walked and stole second base, and the Coons got their own scare with mighty long drive to left hit by Czachor in the bottom 6th. Hollingsworth caught that one right against the wall; too high, not quite deep enough, still a 2-2 tie. Top 7th, Rafael Gomez ripped a leadoff double over the head of Lopez to maintain the illusion that the Coons could win this game. Despite his performance in the last six weeks being utterly lacking top to bottom, the Miners walked Kevin Slumpenberg intentionally, bringing up Tovias with two on and nobody out, which he turned into one on and two outs with a wonderfully placed grounder to Greg Becker. Santillano then handled Cookie's grounder to end the inning. The Miners didn't fare much better. Santillano doubled off Jeff Kearney to begin the bottom 8th, the only batter Kearney faced, and then was stranded by Ricky Ohl with a K to Czachor, not-future-Coons-Hall-of-Famer Omar Alfaro grounding out to first, and Becker flying out to Cookie Carmona.

Nope, this game, tougher than old boots, went to extra innings when the Miners stranded two against Billy Brotman in the bottom 9th. Come the tenth, Nunley and Hollingsworth would slap 1-out singles off right-hander Howard Haws. Tim Stalker batted for Brotman, but flew out to Lopez. Ramos was up with two down, lined to left-center, and Lopez missed that one. Both Nunley and Hollingsworth scored before de la Riva could make an attempt at a play after cutting off the gapper near the warning track, holding Ramos to a 2-out, 2-run double. Ramos stole third base, then scored on Spencer's single to shallow left before lefty George Marsh replaced the luckless Haws. Marsh got Gomez to fly out to center, and with that the game was in Jonathan Snyder's paws against the 5-6-7 batters, a.k.a. all the danger for two days running. After getting two outs from the main threats, Snyder not only lost Alfaro in a full count, but also Becker and Leo Otero, bringing up the left-handed batting Jorge Lopez as the winning run… The Coons had seen enough and sent for Josh Boles to get a lefty in as long as the rewards were promising. The merciless K to Lopez ended the game, and the Miners' 8-game winning streak, too. 5-2 Furballs. Ramos 1-3, 3 BB, 2B, 3 RBI; Gomez 2-6, 2B; Carmona 3-5, 2 2B; Nunley 2-5, 2B; Hollingsworth 2-3, 2 BB; Nomura 7.0 IP, 7 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 4 BB, 4 K;

Game 3
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – 1B Mora – RF Gomez – C Tovias – 2B Rock – 3B Nunley – CF Hollingsworth – P Gutierrez
PIT: LF J. Lopez – SS Tyer – C Henley – CF de la Riva – 1B Santillano – 3B Czachor – RF O. Alfaro – 2B Becker – P Benavides

The Raccoons scored first(!) in this left-handed duel, getting Spencer on with a single, Mora with a walk, and then putting Spencer across on Gomez' groundout after he had stolen third base. The lead didn't stand up at all, though, as Tyer's single and Henley's double into the corner undid it right away in the bottom of the first inning. On to the third, where Ramos coaxed a leadoff walk from Benavides, Spencer singled, and when Mora grounded to Jeff Becker, Tyer dropped the feed and all paws were safe, three on, nobody out. Oh goody, the perfect jump-off point to make total fools of ourselves again! Gomez cracked a 2-0 pitch to left, past the lunging Tyer for an RBI single, but when Tovias hit an 0-2 offering to the left side, Tyer was upon that and turned a 6-4-3 double play. Spencer scored, but he was the final runner to cross home plate in the inning, with Rock lining out to Becker.

…and again Rico Gutierrez was immediately and violently upended. Tyer singled, de la Riva homered to tie the game in the bottom 3rd, and then Santillano and Czachor also ripped singles to go to the corners before Alfaro flew out to Hollingsworth in pretty deep center to end the damn inning… But don't you feel bad for Omar Alfaro (because I forbid it to begin with…), because he got the go-ahead single, a 2-out blooper in the bottom 5th and the third of four singles the Miners got in the inning. They scored two runs, the second coming in on Jeff Becker's RBI single, and closed Rico's outright disgusting line at five innings, 12 hits, and five runs.

A de la Riva homer off Kevin Surginer in the bottom 7th extended the Miners' edge to 6-3, but their own bullpen found a tough spot in the eighth inning, much to anybody's surprise. Gomez and Tovias went to the corners with nobody out, and here came Howard Haws again. Harenberg batted for Rock, but walked on four halfhearted pitches before the Miners sent left-hander Rob Owensby after Nunley with the tying runs all aboard and nobody out. Owensby, too, faced only that one batter and allowed an RBI single, a whizzer that narrowly got past Becker's extended glove and into shallow center. With the right-handed Dan Lambert coming in immediately, the Coons went back to their box of tricks and sent Cookie to bat for Hollingsworth, and he squeezed Lambert for a walk on five pitches, bringing in another run, 6-5! Daniel Bullock batted for Brotman by necessity, since only Liu was left on the bench other than that. Lambert still didn't find the zone, lost Bullock in a full count, and we were tied (and still three on, no outs…!)! Ramos grounded to first, with Santillano firing home to kill Nunley, but the bases remained loaded until Spencer's sac fly gave the Coons a 7-6 lead. Mora's soft roller on the infield should have ended the inning, but the Miners couldn't play it in any way, instead loading the bases again for Gomez, who drove in Bullock and Ramos with a sharp single to left-center. COONS, COONS, COONS!! Finally, the defeated and dismembered Lambert was removed. Jarrod Morrison replaced him, longtime Indians closer, 41 years old. Tovias grounding out against him ended the inning with a 9-6 score after a 6-spot. Morrison conceded a 2-out run in the ninth inning to add to the Coons' total, Cookie drawing a walk and scoring after singles by Liu and Ramos. Jeff Kearney began the bottom 9th with a 10-6 lead, then left with a 10-7 lead and Santillano on first, while there were no outs. De la Riva had smacked a leadoff jack, and trouble was on. The Coons scrambled for Snyder, who surrendered an RBI triple to Czachor, then threw a wild pitch to shorten the score to 10-9. By the way, there was still nobody out. Josh Keen struck out, Jeff Becker popped out, Bobby Ortega flew out to center. 10-9 Critters. Spencer 3-4, BB, 2B, RBI; Gomez 3-5, 4 RBI; Nunley 2-5, RBI; Carmona (PH) 0-0, 2 BB, RBI; Bullock (PH) 0-0, BB, RBI; Liu (PH) 1-1;

(blinks slowly and looks very pale)

Anyway, Billy Brotman picked up the W in both this game and the one on Wednesday, giving him five for the season a.k.a more than Rico Gutierrez.

Raccoons (43-24) @ Indians (34-31) – June 18-20, 2027

The Indians stubbornly clung onto their above-.500 record despite all signs hinting at them not belonging anywhere near it. They were right at the bottom of the league or at least the bottom three in most important offensive categories, and were scoring only 3.4 runs per game, easily enough for last place in the CL. Their pitching was very good, though, with the third-fewest runs conceded, but that still gave them a -22 run differential (Coons: +78). These teams so far had split a 4-game series in 2027.

Projected matchups:
Mark Roberts (6-2, 2.86 ERA) vs. Myles Mood (3-5, 3.18 ERA)
Dan Delgadillo (3-5, 3.42 ERA) vs. Chris Sinkhorn (7-4, 3.66 ERA)
Kyle Anderson (7-3, 3.05 ERA) vs. John McInerney (6-6, 2.74 ERA)

Following the right-handed Myles Mood on Friday, we could not expect anything but right-handers the rest of the way. The Indians were employing four of those buggers.

Game 1
POR: SS Ramos – 2B Spencer – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – CF Mora – LF Carmona – 3B Nunley – C Liu – P Roberts
IND: SS Pizano – 2B E. Sosa – RF O'Rourke – CF Suhay – LF de Negri – C J. Ramirez – 1B Tello – 3B C. Castro – P Mood

Indy moved up 2-0 on a bloop (David de Negri) and a blast (Jose Ramirez) in the second inning while Mark Roberts otherwise struck out four in the first run through the Indians' lineup. The Coons were rather tame except for Nunley's leadoff double in the third inning, after which he advanced on a Liu groundout, then scored on a wild pitch. Nunley's 2-base effort was the Critters' only base hit through five innings, but Ramos led off the sixth with a single. Ramos advanced on two groundouts, then scored… on a wild pitch.

Whatever works?

Mark Roberts was left with a no-decision, spending 106 pitches in just six innings, again to no avail. Kevin Surginer gave the Coons the seventh and eighth innings, while the offense remained dead from the ankles up. Liu drew a leadoff walk against Mood in the eighth inning, advanced on Hollingsworth's grounder, Ramos was walked intentionally, and Spencer and Gomez couldn't get the ball past the infielders. Kevin Harenberg's leadoff single up the middle in the ninth inning against Mo Robinson was the Coons' third base hit in the game. Abel Mora hit into a fielder's choice, Trey Rock pinch-hit and popped out, and Nunley whiffed. And the really good news – the Indians couldn't fart themselves a run, either, and this game also went to extra innings …! The revolting joy! The Coons had nothing (oh wonder) in the top 10th, but the Indians put Manuel Cardona on second base in the bottom 10th when Elias Sosa fired a 2-out drive to deep left. Hollingsworth made everybody happy with a flying catch in the depths of the gap, and this game would yet go on! Top 11th, Cory Dew, the former Raccoon, allowed a soft 1-out single to shallow center to Rafael Gomez (base hit #4 in the game, not for Gomez, but ALL THE COONS), and then was unlucky when Harenberg's soft liner fell just in front of the rushing Ben Suhay. Gomez raced for third base to be in sacrifice position for Abel Mora, who found the idea appalling and instead hit another single to shallow center. WHOAH, A RUN!! The Coons even found another one after Tovias walked in McLin's spot, when Nunley got Harenberg home with an actual sac fly. Liu grounded out to end the inning. Josh Boles was sent into the bottom 11th in deference to Snyder having had two long and chewy outings in Pittsburgh, promptly allowed a leadoff single to ex-Elk Dave O'Rourke, got Jon Siebuhr and Jose Ramirez, then yielded a sharp single to Tello. I was looking at the pen with great consternation – it was mostly burned out after a ravaging Miners series. This was Boles' to lose or to save. He saved it with strike three on Ramon Tello. 4-2 Blighters. Harenberg 2-5; Roberts 6.0 IP, 4 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 6 K; Surginer 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K; McLin 2.0 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 1 K, W (3-2);

I wonder when one of our starting pitchers most recently won a game…

Game 2
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – C Tovias – 2B Stalker – CF Hollingsworth – 3B Bullock – P Delgadillo
IND: SS Pizano – 2B E. Sosa – 1B Cardona – CF Suhay – RF Siebuhr – LF Jamieson – 3B J. Navarro – C Dale – P McInerney

Portland players couldn't be bothered to get a base hit in the first three innings of the middle game, up until Rafael Gomez hit a single to left-center to lead off the fourth inning of a scoreless game. Before that, Spencer had walked in the first, and Hollingsworth had reached on an error in the second, but the oomph was still missing and remained as such throughout the inning, as the Coons couldn't even get Gomez to second base, let alone around to score. Like the offense's inability to get H's and R's, Delgadillo failed to find K's as this game started and went through the early innings, until Siebuhr and Jamieson encroached on him with 2-out singles in the bottom 4th, after which he got Navarro to swing and miss for strike three.

The stalemate would be broken in the fifth with a run on Delgadillo that couldn't have been more unearned if they had tried; Ramos mishandled Joe Dale's grounder to begin the inning for the first error, and then Bullock threw away McInerney's bunt for another error. Runners on second and third, nobody out, and the stuffless Yusneldan was doomed. Mario Pizano flew out to shallow right to still keep the runners pinned, but Elias Sosa's fly to left was deep enough to get Dale home with the first run of the game, or in other words, ballgame, even before the Indians scored another run when Jamieson drove home Siebuhr in the bottom 6th. Dale then singled with two outs, and Delgadillo drilled McInerney to load the bases at which point he deserved whatever grisly thing they would do to him. Pizano grounded out to Spencer on the first pitch. Top 9th, Mo Robinson inherited McInerney's 3-hitter and the 2-0 lead, then walked Harenberg to get going. Tovias, who had already hit into a double play in the game, hit into a fielder's choice now. Stalker grounded out. Cookie grounded out. 2-0 Indians. Delgadillo 6.0 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 1 K, L (3-6); Brotman 2.0 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 BB, 2 K;

GODDAMNIT SCORE SOME RUNS, YOU ****ING ****S!!

At least that old yeller sent them for cover and out of my sight…

Game 3
POR: SS Ramos – LF Spencer – RF Gomez – 1B Harenberg – C Tovias – CF Mora – 2B Rock – 3B Nunley – P Anderson
IND: SS Pizano – 2B E. Sosa – 1B Cardona – CF Suhay – LF O'Rourke – 3B C. Castro – RF de Negri – C J. Ramirez – P Sinkhorn

The miserable Coons scored without the benefit of a run when Ramos was nicked by Sinkhorn's 1-2 to begin the game, angrily swiped second, advanced on Spencer's grounder, and waggled home on Gomez' deep F9 to de Negri. The Indians shrugged. Pizano led off the bottom 1st with a double, Sosa and Cardona made hard outs, and then the .200 batter Suhay lobbed one over the leftfield fence to give them a 2-1 lead. In my state of agony I had to wait to the fourth inning again to see them get a ****ing base hit, this time Spencer singling up the middle. He went to second on Gomez' looper over Pizano for a second single, then to third when Strandemberg flew out to the annoying Suhay in centerfield. That brought up Tovias with a chance for an inning-ending double play. And that was also how the ****ing inning ended.

I took a wee portion of the game off to have a little personal time here (crying on the Arrowheads' public toilet), and when I came back I found the Coons had tied the score at two in the top 5th, courtesy of a Matt Nunley double. Oh, Matt Nunley – when he ever retires, we can close down the franchise for good …! Or maybe even sooner – Ben Suhay, the disgusting pumpkinhead, hit an RBI double off Anderson in the bottom 6th that put Indy back in front, 3-2. Elias Sosa had drawn a leadoff walk in the inning, to be fair the first one Anderson had issued. By the bottom 7th, Anderson threw away a de Negri grounder that should have been the first out for a 2-base error, that run of course came also around to score, and my sympathy for him immediately reduced itself significantly…

Top 8th of what was probably a coaster to the finish line now for Sinkhorn, Spencer grounded out to Cesar Castro to begin the inning before Gomez and Harenberg hit for seven bases in the wrong order. Gomez homered to left, and then Harenberg hit a triple into the gap between O'Rourke and Suhay, which meant the tying run was on third base for Tovias, which had potential for all sorts of adversities and infirmities. He ended up hitting a sac fly, getting Anderson off the hook, but the Raccoons would not grab a lead. Ricky Ohl held the Indians in check in the bottom 8th, with Rock grounding out against Sergio Aredondo to begin the ninth inning, but then Nunley hit a double to left, but would be stranded between Cookie and Spencer grounding out around another intentional walk to Ramos. Instead, the Indians walked off on Josh Boles in the bottom 9th with a leadoff triple by Jose Navarro. Boles' defense to that crummy situation (winning run at third, no outs) was to walk Ramon Tello, then surrender the game on Ramirez' single up the middle. 5-4 Indians. Gomez 2-3, HR, 3 RBI; Harenberg 2-4, 3B; Nunley 2-4, 2 2B, RBI;

In other news

June 16 – He still has it, hasn't he? SFB SP Jonathan Toner (4-2, 2.30 ERA) throws a 4-hit shutout, whiffing six, against the Wolves in a 4-0 Bayhawks win.
June 16 – TOP SP Joe Jones (5-7, 4.13 ERA) has himself quite the day in the Buffaloes' 13-1 rout over the Canadiens. The 29-year-old left-hander pitches 7.2 innings of 1-run ball and also casually has three base hits, including a double, and 4 RBI against the interleague opposition.
June 17 – SFW LF Jeff Wadley (.313, 6 HR, 47 RBI) extends a hitting streak to 20 games with a fifth-inning single in the Warriors' 8-5 win over the Falcons.
June 17 – NAS SP Pat Staley (1-5, 5.62 ERA) gets his first win of the season (and in 14 attempts) in style, 3-hitting the Condors in a 7-0 shutout.
June 18 – The hitting streak of SFW LF Jeff Wadley (.307, 6 HR, 47 RBI) finds a quick end after 21 games as he goes 0-for-5 in a 5-4 loss to the Scorpions.
June 19 – LAP INF Jamie Wilson (.322, 1 HR, 23 RBI) hits a single off DAL CL Eric Davidson (2-5, 4.40 ERA, 13 SV) for his 2,000 base hit, but the Pacifics still lose to the Stars, 7-6. Wilson, a 7-time All Star and 18-year veteran, is a career .281/.412/.403 batter with 152 HR and 917 RBI.
June 19 – The Rebels acquire INF John Hansen (.221, 0 HR, 19 RBI) from the Pacifics, along with a prospect, and send SP Jim Bryant (4-7, 4.96 ERA) to L.A.
June 20 – BOS SP Greg Gannon (8-3, 3.01 ERA) 3-hits the Crusaders in a 6-0 shutout.
June 20 – SAL RF/LF Nelson Colon (.254, 3 HR, 38 RBI) drives in five runs on three hits in the Wolves' 14-8 win over the Gold Sox that includes a 7-run seventh.

Complaints and stuff

They couldn't be less fun. If, a million years ago, you would have given the first humans a few bats and a ball and would have waited for them to figure it out, they could not have looked less inspiring. The Loggers (24-45) were probably not giving their GM such a hard time than these Raccoons. Absolutely crummy, the entire lineup, top to bottom, everybody is sucking their socks off!

Oh, good news, we'll have the Titans in for three games next week. That should solve the CL North mystery for the year…

Fun Fact: On Thursday, Carlos de la Riva (.308, 9 HR, 41 RBI after the fact) became the first Miners batter to slug three home runs in a game.

Yes, of course it was the Raccoons' fault. Rico, Surginer, and Kearney all got knelt. It is the fifth time in the decade that we were responsible for somebody else's 3-homer game. Oh well, at least John Calfee of the disgusting Elks didn't do it to us in September. Oh, and we still won, which is funnily enough the second such 3-homer game we actually won in the 2020s. We also squeezed out a 9-8 win over the Condors in Pat Sanford's 3-HR effort in 2024. We are the only team to win a game in which an opposing player hit three home runs in the last 13 years.