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The Oakland Telegraph
10 November 2033
Padres win the World Series after seventh game thriller against Detroit
By Sandy Eygo, southern California correspondent
The San Diego Padres last night won the World Series, their first of the Dynastic Era, after a drama-filled 7-3 win over the Detroit Tigers in the seventh and deciding game.
I'm afraid we can't tell you any more about the series. As an Oakland-based and entirely Oakland-focused newspaper we didn't bother to send any correspondents to cover it, and indeed none of us so-called sports journalists even bothered to watch it on television. We only know the score because one of the sub-editors read it on ESPN's website.
What we can confidently say, however, is that San Diego's victory marks the end of another exciting season. The players can take a well-earned rest. Although, given that this is an imaginary parallel universe and most of the players don't exist except as a series of 1s and 0s inside an iPad, they can't really take a rest. But you know what we mean. While the players rest and relax, their front office colleagues can do anything but. This is where the action really starts to hot up for Paulie Beane and his general manager counterparts at the other clubs. What wheeling and dealing will they all do to get their teams ready to challenge in 2034? There's only one way to find out. No, not look on the ESPN website, although of course that is a much better way than I had in mind. I meant, stay right here with the Telegraph. Please. Cherry on top.
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