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The Oakland Telegraph
12 May 2032
More headaches for Beane as struggling Jimenez seeks new contract
By Don Thinksoson, contract negotiations correspondent
Oakland's tribulations continued last night after reports of a strained conversation between general manager Paulie Beane and the agent of starting third baseman Juan Jimenez. The 31-year-old Jimenez is in the final year of his current deal, and is reputed to have asked to ink an extension with the A's.
Insiders say the gist of Beane's response was: "That's nice, but your client is batting .184 from 28 games so far this season. Come back when his performance is better than my mum could do, and then maybe we'll talk. In the meantime, please close the door behind you on your way out of my office." Our source said Beane in fact used somewhat more Anglo-Saxon language than this family-friendly translation of his remarks.
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