CHAPTER 4
"F---in' A"
By the time the start of the 2013 season had rolled around, baseball itself was just a formality. The firing of the minor league coaches had taken its toll on not only the front office, but also the coaches up and down the minor league system. All were wondering if the axe would fall on them next. No amount of reassuring would put their minds at ease.
Coco Crisp provided some much needed relief and levity during the first month of the season. He provided a pair of walk-off basehits on the way to Player of the Month honors for the month of April by batting .339 with a surprising 7 homeruns and 24 RBI. The 33 year-old outfielder, known more for his defense and baserunning, was among the league leaders in all power categories. He helped spark a 5-game win streak that month, as the A's went 14-14, 2.5 games behind the front-running Los Angeles Angels.
By mid-May, Billy Beane was already hankering for a trade.
"Forsty!" Billy shouts from the break room while pouring a cup of hot coffee. "Get out the List. I want to make a F---in' A trade!"
The "F---in' A" trade, as we learned ten years prior, is a trade that makes other executives around the league think, "f---in' A!"
The List, as it's called, is David Forsty's always-in-flux ranking of players around the league who are not only possibly available, but also an ideal fit for the A's roster.
"What position did you have in mind?" David shouts from his Toyota Corolla-sized office.
"First base," Billy answers.
"Righty or lefty?" David counters immediately. He already knows the answer. The A's already have two left-handed hitting first baseman in Daric Barton (batting .321 in 28 at-bats) and Brandon Moss (.240 with 5 homeruns in 104 at-bats). Oakland has mastered the art of the platoon, matching lefty bats versus righty arms, and vice versa. But in the case of first base, the A's have two lefties and no righties.
"Righty," Billy says as he meanders over to David's office. He hands a cup of coffee over to David, who is clicking away on his mouse.
"Alright, your top five, in no particular are..." David pauses for a drum roll, to which Billy happily obliges."
"Dayan 'The Cuban Tank' Viciedo..."
A 24-year-old homerun machine from... you guessed it: Cuba. He hit 25 homeruns in his first full season in 2012, while striking out 120 times with a .255 average. He's actually been playing outfield for the Chicago White Sox, but could adequately play first base. In a Scott Hatteburg sort of way.
"Michael Young..."
Due to make $16 million in the final year of his contract in Philadelphia, the 36 year-old is well past his prime. But the free-spending Phillies could be convinced to pay much of that salary if the right offer came along.
"Jean Segura..."
The Milwaukee Brewers have turned over full-time first base duties to the 23 year-old, who had come over from the Angels in the Zach Greinke trade the year before.
"Billy Butler..."
Suddenly out of favor in Kansas City, Butler has become expendable with the rise of fellow first baseman Eric Hosmer. Butler's coming off a career year in 2012 (.313, 29 HR, 107 RBI), but his $8 million salary this year has made him a luxury the penny-pinching Royals can no longer afford.
"and Brandon Belt."
A promising 25-year old across the Bay in San Francisco, the Giants haven't been able to decide what to do with Belt, who has superior defensive skills but lacks the power to be a traditional first baseman.
"Alright, alright, alright," Billy says, thinking aloud. "Take Segura off the list. There's no way the Indians are letting him go. Scratch Belt off too."
"Why Belt?" David asks, surprised.
"Because f--- the Giants," Billy shoots back. "That's why."
The Giants and A's have some bad blood between them, enough to fill the San Francisco Bay, over the territorial rights squabble in San Jose. Billy knows any trade he makes needs approval from the owner, and he knows he won't get it from Lew. Not unless he somehow screws over the Giants in a trade, which likely won't be the case.
"That leaves Butler, Young, and Viciedo," David reminds Billy.
"Get rid of Viciedo," Billy says as David makes another mouse click. "Kenny may have made us a trade, but I think Rick is scared s---less of me."
Kenny would be former White Sox GM Kenny Williams, who infamously dealt veteran second baseman Ray Durham to Billy for relief pitcher Jon Adkins in 2002. After getting taken for several lopsided trades by Billy, the White Sox brass essentially cut off communication with Oakland after Rick Hahn took over as GM.
So it's down to the Phillies' Michael Young and the Royals' Billy Butler.
"Who to take, who to take..." Billy asks aloud. David already knows the answer. He usually knows what Billy's going to do before Billy even knows it. Still, he lets Billy work it out himself.
"Where is Philly in the standings?" Billy asks.
19-15. Same exact record as the A's, just by chance. They're 3.5 games back of the red-hot Washington Nationals, who are sporting the best record in baseball at 22-11.
"The Royals have got to be in last place," Billy says, almost as if it's a question. He's right. They have the worst record in the Majors at 11-20.
Now Billy's setting his sights on Butler. Just as David expected.
Billy Butler, former first-round pick in the 2004 Draft. All-Star selection last year at first base. His career batting average has hovered right around .300 over each of the last four years. Any doubt about his power numbers were erased when he bombed 29 homers in 2012. He's a F---in' A Trade.
"Billy f---ing Butler," Billy says to no one in particular.
"F--ing A," David chimes in.
Over the course of the next fifteen minutes, Billy and David throw names back and forth at each other in rapid fire succession. It really is a beautiful thing. You would swear they were married. At the same exact moment, they arrive at the same exact conclusion.
Chris Young.
Young is the perfect player. His salary figure of $8.5 million is almost a wash with Butler's $8 million this year, and he's got a team option of $11 million, which Kansas City would almost certainly decline in 2014. He would give the Royals a much-needed bat in the outfield next to Alex Gordon in the short term, and they could try to trade him off for prospects come the All-Star break.
The trade also makes plenty of sense for the A's, who haven't been able to work Crisp into the platoon they envisioned, thanks to his torrid start. Most MLB teams carry four outfielders on their roster. The A's have been carrying five with Coco, Young, Yoenis Cespedes, Josh Reddick, and Seth Smith. Young is the odd man out.
As quickly as that, Billy is on the phone with Royals GM Dayton Moore. Moore, unbeknownst to the A's, has been shopping Butler around without much success. The Yankees had expressed interest with their starting first baseman Mark Teixeira out with a wrist injury, but were unwilling to move much in return. Butler would've been a short term solution and the Yanks would only pay for the value they saw in Butler, which wasn't much.
Billy is selling Young hard, assuring Moore that there's nothing wrong with his centerfielder.
"Coco's just playing to well to find Chris a spot in the field," Billy explains. "His bat is just fine. We tried to stick him in a platoon and he's just not comfortable hitting against lefties alone. He's an everyday player."
Young, in actuality, doesn't need much selling. He's got incredible range and can play all three outfield positions. He hits for power and can steal bases. Young, as it turns out, would've made a perfect fit for the A's if not for Coco's hot start.
The two sides haggle over a couple of prospects to be thrown in to the deal until they come to a resolution. In the end, the A's trade Young, along with three AAA prospects (C Luke Montz, P Brian Gordon, SS Andy Parrino) to the Royals for Butler and low minors outfielder Alexis Rivera.
Amazingly, Billy had been pouring coffee in the break room two hours ago, and now here he is, sending a former All-Star outfielder to Kansas City for another All-Star.
Such is the genius of Billy "F---in' A" Beane.